Daily News Update – May 24, 2022

We’re in a bit of a different era these days, as we now have unified Tag Team Champions, plus the lack of Sasha Banks and Naomi. I know WWE got their chance to complain about Banks and Naomi last week, but why do it once when you can do it again? Other than that, we might actually get something new set for the pay per view next weekend. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Usos beating RKBro to win the Raw Tag Team Titles. The Bloodline wrecked RKBro after the match.

Here is Riddle for a chat, because that’s how long a post match beatdown lasts for these days. Riddle talks about how things have been hard for Randy Orton in the last few years. His back was messed up before the unification match and he could barely walk. Riddle isn’t happy with “that tribal piece of trash” Roman Reigns and he wants revenge on all of the Bloodline. Vengeance is sworn and he knows that Orton is watching at home. The RKBro chants take us to a break. Serious Riddle is different and while he wasn’t the most natural, I bought it.

Riddle/Street Profits vs. Sami Zayn/Usos

The Usos get in a quick promo about how great they are, plus a special entrance, announcing them as FROM THE BLOODLINE. The brawl is on at the stage and we take a break before the bell. Back with the opening bell, giving us a cliffhanger time of about 2:53. Sami backs away from Dawkins to start as Riddle and Ford trade places on the apron for some unclear reason.

Dawkins takes him into the corner and hands it off to Riddle, with Zayn going after the bad ribs. Riddle fights up and hands it off to Ford for some house cleaning, only to have him get sent outside. A whip into the steps leaves Ford down and we take a break. Back with Ford still in trouble as Riddle’s ribs are dropped onto the barricade by the Usos. Ford fights up and brings in Riddle, which might not be the smartest tagging choice. Everything breaks down and Ford hits a flip dive onto the Usos. Riddle hits Zayn with the hanging DDT as the Usos walk off. The RKO finishes Zayn at 12:38.

Rating: C. This was about making Riddle look like a serious threat and they did it work enough. He had the bad ribs but survived and won here, as he had Zayn beaten before the Usos left. Riddle as the next challenger to Roman Reigns makes sense, though I’m still not sure why I should believe he has an actual chance at winning.

We look back at Bobby Lashley beating Omos in a cage last week, almost by accident.

Here is Bobby Lashley for the Almighty Challenge to MVP and Omos, the latter of whom he is facing at Hell In A Cell. Cue MVP and Omos, who don’t think much of Lashley. Here’s the challenge: a match tonight, with the winner getting to pick the stipulation for the pay per view match. Lashley wants MVP tonight and after a little goading, gets MVP to agree. MVP and Omos come to the ring but then leave without doing anything.

Crown Jewel is back on November 5.

We look back at Asuka becoming the new #1 contender last week.

Dana Brooke wants Carmella but runs into Becky Lynch (in an….odd shirt). After an exchange of cattiness, Lynch says she wants Asuka. That’s cool with Adam Pearce, who makes a rematch for tonight. If Becky wins, it’s a triple threat match at Hell In A Cell.

Here is the Judgment Day for a chat. Damian Priest talks about how they had an open call for new members last week but now those people need to help themselves. Rhea Ripley rants about how she doesn’t like Liv Morgan before Edge talks about how the team is power. Edge says everyone is a sheeple and afraid to get everything you can out of life. Now the question is who joins the team next. Maybe it’s Tommaso (yes Tommaso) Ciampa, Corey Graves or Drew McIntyre (Edge: “Surprised you with that one didn’t I?”). Or maybe AJ Styles, who can learn to call him Uncle Edge.

Liv Morgan/AJ Styles vs. Rhea Ripley/Damian Priest

Priest works on Style’s arm to start but Styles is back up with the tag off to Morgan to clean elbow Ripley in the corner. Ripley pulls her out of the air and tries a suplex, which is reversed into a Backstabber. That’s enough to send Ripley outside and Morgan hits a dive. A heck of a knee from Styles drops Priest on the floor but Ripley runs Morgan over back inside. It’s back to the men with Priest sending Styles into the corner. That’s fine with Styles, who knocks him to the floor but glared at by Ripley.

We take a break and come back with Morgan dropkicking Ripley, setting up a springboard spinning Codebreaker for two, as Edge puts the boot on the rope. Styles decks Edge but Priest makes the save. That leaves Liv to try Oblivion but Edge holds Ripley back, allowing her to stack Liv up for the pin at 10:31.

Rating: C. It isn’t a good sign that Judgment Day is only really interesting when they are adding someone new or not wrestling/talking. They have a great look and presence, but the “we’re better than you and you’re all stupid” isn’t exactly inspired stuff. Maybe it works better once they get beyond the AJ feud, though it isn’t grabbing me so far.

Post match the big beatdown is on, with Styles and Liv being left laying.

Miz says he doesn’t trust anyone with a neck tattoo and Cody Rhodes’ ego is out of control. He has more pyro than the 4th of July and it is time to take him down a peg.

Here is Jerry Lawler for the King’s Court. He hypes up Veer Mahaan as a monster and brings him out to ask some questions. Mahaan doesn’t have anything to say, but Lawler asks if that is because of what the “Dominiks” did to him last week. Lawler asks if it’s because Mahaan is so hairy that when he goes outside to walk his dog, people pet him instead. Mahaan grabs the mic and says this isn’t about being funny. Violence is threatened but the Mysterios run in for the save. They knock Mahaan to the floor where he yells at them a lot.

Alexa Bliss is glad to be back and laughs at Sonya Deville’s recent issues. Maybe Deville should try some therapy. As of tonight, she gets to beat up Nikki Ash, who dressed up like a super hero while Bliss talks to a doll. Bliss: “It sounds weird when I say it.”

Alexa Bliss vs. Nikki Ash

Doudrop is here with Nikki Ash. Bliss takes her down to start and sends Ash outside so posing can ensue. Back in and Ash gets in a shot of her own to set up a chinlock, which is broken up rather quickly. A running Blockbuster gives Bliss two but Ash catches her on top. That is broken up and Twisted Bliss finishes Ash at 2:58.

Seth Rollins is asked about his issues with Cody Rhodes and how they escalated this far. Rollins talks about fans cheering for him every week and singing his song but now all he hears are CODY chants. Now there is even a countdown clock for Cody. WHERE DOES IT STOP??? The countdown is on for Rollins as well, and it’s ticking down.

Video on Asuka.

Asuka says Becky Lynch wasn’t ready for Asuka last week and mocks her crying. Tonight, she’ll beat Becky again and turn her into the Big Time Baby.

Cody Rhodes vs. The Miz

Miz grabs a headlock to start but Cody is right back up with an early rollup. A dropkick puts Miz on the floor but he blocks a dive with a shot to the face. The threat of the Figure Four is broken up and Cody hits some running knees to the ribs. Miz kicks him off the apron though and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a powerslam and the Cody Cutter, setting up the Figure Four. Miz gets out so Cody goes up, only to get shoved off the top by Seth Rollins for the DQ at 8:52.

Rating: C. They might as well have put up a big sign to Rollins interfering and that is more or less what Rollins promised before the match. It’s a good enough match, but at the same time, you can’t have Cody pin Miz? Maybe that happens next week or the week after, but there is something a little strange about Cody not being able to get a pin here.

Post match Rollins sends Cody knees first into the steps and then steals a weightlifting belt from the fan Cody handed it to. That means a heck of a whip to the back and Rhodes is left laying. With Rollins gone, Cody gets up and limps to the back, making sure to hand the belt back to the fan on the way.

Ezekiel vs. Chad Gable

Kevin Owens and Otis are here too. Gable takes him to the mat to start as Owens shouts about barbecue sauce. Ezekiel comes back up with the chops and sends Gable into the corner. After Gable escapes an electric chair, Otis gets in a chop block and Gables goes after the knee. There’s a dragon screw legwhip and Gable gets to pose. Gable takes him down again but the moonsault hits raised boots. Ezekiel gets a kick out of the corner but Otis offers another trip. That’s enough for an ejection so Owens tries to come in as well, only to get ejected too. Distraction, rollup, Ezekiel wins, 4:22.

Rating: D. This is the kind of match that can get rather annoying because you could see almost every step they were going to take from the second the match started. They then did exactly what you would have expected, but even then the match felt a bit clunky. It wasn’t a disaster or the worst match of the year, but it was a boring wait to get to the ending, which didn’t look great either.

Post match Ezekiel bails into the crowd but Owens says cut the music. All he cares about is beating the heck out of Ezekiel, Elias, Giuseppe, or whatever he calls himself. The challenge is on for Hell in a Cell with Ezekiel agreeing.

We look at Seth Rollins taking Cody Rhodes out not that long ago.

Cody Rhodes gets out of the trainer’s room and says this isn’t just Rollins’ second chance, but his shot at going 0-3 against the American Nightmare. Rhodes will be waiting in the Cell. Good fire from Cody here.

Bobby Lashley vs. MVP

The winner gets to pick the stipulations for Omos, at ringside, vs. Lashley at Hell in a Cell. MVP bails to the floor to start and then hides in the corner as well. The third stalling is on the floor again, with Lashley going after him. Omos gets in a cheap shot this time, and now MVP is fine enough to hit the running boot in the corner. Lashley is right back up and posts MVP but another Omos distraction means Lashley can’t beat the count at 3:06.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of a smoke and mirrors match, as MVP wasn’t exactly doing much here. Maybe his knee isn’t better or maybe they were trying to make it feel one sided, but they were keeping it simple here. They did a good enough job of setting up the pay per view match, assuming you can accept that there is any reason for Lashley vs. Omos to be happening again.

Post match Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock on MVP for about five seconds.

Asuka vs. Becky Lynch

Bianca Belair is at ringside and if Becky wins, the Women’s Title match at Hell in a Cell is a triple threat. Corey Graves seems to get annoyed at Mike Rome for some reason during the entrances and it’s Asuka driving her into the corner to start. The threat of the armbar sends Lynch outside but the sliding knee misses. Lynch sends her hard into the post and we take an early break.

Back with Asuka being knocked off the apron but managing to get back inside. A shot in the corner staggers Asuka but she is is back with a German suplex for two. Becky goes up but dives into a Codebreaker, setting up the cross armbreaker. That sends Becky to the rope but Asuka superplexes her down for two.

The running hip attack in the rope misses so Becky cranks on the arm, earning herself a dragon screw legwhip. Now it’s the hip attack sending Lynch to the floor, where Asuka kicks Belair by mistake. Becky takes her down and slides in, with Asuka beating the count. That’s fine with Becky, who grabs a rollup for the pin at 10:52.

Rating: C. There’s your 50/50 booking, as Asuka and Becky now both go in to face Belair with a loss to the other. I don’t know how that is supposed to make me believe either has a real chance of winning the title but they have done dumber things. This is where the countout should have taken place, though I can accept not wanting to do two of them (plus a DQ) on the same show.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t a very strong show and a lot of that is due to it feeling like they are dragging the Wrestlemania stories out one more time. AJ vs. Edge, Belair vs. Lynch, Lashley vs. Omos and probably more are all going to be stretched out to a third month, even if they weren’t that interesting at the second. Things should change a bit once they get towards Money in the Bank, but that doesn’t exactly give me hope for next week’s show.

Results
Riddle/Street Profits b. Sami Zayn/Usos – RKO to Zayn
Rhea Ripley/Damian Priest b. AJ Styles/Liv Morgan – Rollup to Morgan
Cody Rhodes b. Miz via DQ when Seth Rollins interfered
Ezekiel b. Chad Gable – Rollup
MVP b. Bobby Lashley via countout
Becky Lynch b. Asuka – Sunset flip

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – May 19, 2022: They Fit In Anywhere

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 19, 2022
Location: Promowest Pavilion, Newport, Kentucky
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We are on the way to Slammiversary and as of last week, we have a new #1 contender. Eric Young won Gauntlet For The Gold to earn the title shot against World Champion Josh Alexander, but that leaves a lot of the card to be filled in. This week will feature the Briscoes defending the Tag Team Titles against Violent By Design in an Under Siege rematch so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s Gauntlet For The Gold, with Eric Young beating Chris Sabin to win the title shot.

Opening sequence.

Ultimate X Qualifying Match: Laredo Kid vs. Mike Bailey

The winner moves on to Slammiversary. They trade legsweeps and no counts to start before flipping to their feet. An exchange of armdrags sends Bailey outside but he blocks a dive with a kick of his own. Back in and the fans are behind Bailey as he kicks Kid down for two more. The exchange of kicks goes to Kid and he grabs a neckbreaker for two.

Kid sends him outside for a suicide dive into the barricade and Bailey is in trouble for a change. Back in and back to back moonsault elbows to the back give Kid two but Bailey kicks him to the floor. That means another big flipping dive (you may notice a pattern here) and a missile dropkick gives Bailey two more back inside.

Bailey’s big kick to the head is countered into a powerbomb for two but Kid has to avoid the Ultimate Weapon. Bailey catches him on top but gets headbutted back down. Kid misses a dive though and a kick to the head gives Bailey two, setting up a pinfall reversal sequence to give Bailey the pin at 8:11.

Rating: C+. I’m still only kind of feeling Bailey as that bow he does at the beginning is hardly the most appealing thing. He can have a pretty good X-Division style match though and that is what they’re going for here. I wouldn’t be surprised if he leaves Slammiversary with the title, but coming in I would have said something similar about Kid. There is talent in this division, and now they are starting to feature them a bit more often.

Ace Austin, in Japan for the New Japan Best Of The Super Juniors, is glad that Bailey has qualified because Bailey deserves punishment for his lack of loyalty. He has already won his first match in the tournament and that is because he is the best in the world. After the tournament, he is heading straight for Nashville to retain the title at Slammiversary.

We get a weird Slammiversary ad, featuring Josh Alexander hearing something and leaving his locker room. Eventually he finds a coat over a crate featuring the old TNA logo.

Matt Cardona and Chelsea Green, on the beach, laugh at the idea of being inside Rich Swann’s head. Cardona may be always ready but he’s not always available, because they are on their honeymoon. Green is ready to get the Knockouts tItle back at Slammiversary.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Deonna Purrazzo/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans vs. Jordynne Grace/Taya Valkyrie/Mia Yim

Purrazzo and Grace trade wrist control to start and it’s an early standoff. That means Steelz and Valkyrie come in with Valkyrie getting the better of things without much trouble. Some running knees in the corner crush Steelz and we take a break. Back with Grace hitting a running elbow to crush Steelz in the corner, setting up a delayed vertical suplex for two.

Evans comes in for a cheap shot though and it’s Purrazzo taking Grace into the corner. A butterfly suplex gives Evans two and the beating is on. Grace suplexes her way out of trouble though and the tag brings in Yim (the fans approve). There’s a Cannonball to Steelz and everything breaks down. Purrazzo gets in a shot to Yim to take over but Taya grabs the sliding German suplex. Eat Defeat gives Yim the pin on Evans at 11:23.

Rating: C. Evans taking the fall here was the logical way to go as she isn’t in the Queen of the Mountain match so there is no point in having someone else take the loss. Giving Yim the pin to get her a bit more over in the fans’ eyes and she is already one of the more interesting players in the division. Now just don’t make the Queen of the Mountain stuff its usual mess and they could be going somewhere.

Post match the lights go out…and it seems to have just been a glitch. Well that’s not nice teasing.

It’s time for Locker Room Talk with Tenille Dashwood as this week’s guest host. This week they are talking about the locker room itself, as they are glad to have gotten rid of some of the worse people. Cue Johnny Swinger, still in his mini Wrestlemania III ring cart, with Zicky Dice pushing him. Decay pops in and wants their Knockouts Tag Team Title shot but are told to go earn it. Dice thinks he recognizes Havok from the Dungeon and pain ensues.

Chris Sabin is disappointed by last week but he’s glad to be here for twenty years. There is one person he remembers from the start and he wants that match next week. That man: Frankie Kazarian.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Chris Sabin defeating Frankie Kazarian to retain the X-Division Title, June 25, 2003.

Eric Young talks about wanting to go to Wrestlemania III when he was a kid but his parents were too poor. We go through his career, including some cool old footage from his Team Canada days, plus his time in the Band. Then he turned into a star and went up to the top of the company, which he will do again at Slammiversary.

Josh Alexander acknowledges what Young has done and thinks he might be the MVP of the first twenty years of Impact. Alexander asks who gets to usher in the next era in Impact, but knows it’s going to be him.

Matt Taven/Mike Bennett vs. Good Brothers

The rest of Honor No More and the Bullet Club are here too, with Maria Kanellis-Bennett on commentary. Bennett and Anderson lock up to s-tart and slug it out as commentary brings up Maria’s history with the Good Brothers in Japan in 2015 but she moves on as fast as she can. It’s off to Gallows to clothesline Taven down before Anderson comes back in to whip Taven into the corner.

A blind tag lets Bennett come back in for a double hot shot though and the villains take over. Taven’s missile dropkick gets two and Bennett is smart enough to dropkick Gallows off the apron like a good villain should. We’re right back to the chinlock but Anderson pops up without much trouble.

The hot tag brings in Gallows to clean house, including something like a spinning Big Ending to Taven. The chokeslam is broken up though and Taven hits a Lionsault for two. Bennett superkicks Taven by mistake though and it’s the reverse 3D for…no count as Maria gets up on the apron. Maria comes in and Bennett accidentally spears her down by mistake. The Gun Stun finishes for Anderson at 10:36.

Rating: C+. Oddly enough, the Good Brothers are working slightly better as faces. Maybe it’s the lack of being the cool heels but this is an upgrade over what they have been doing. Maria costing Honor No More the match is a way to keep them a bit stronger, though the team continues to not exactly do much.

Sami Callihan is glad Moose broke his leg because it gave Sami the better part of a year to think about what he could do to Moose.

Masha Slamovich vs. Shawna Reed

Slamovich unloads on her in the corner to start and the Snowplow is good for the pin at 51 seconds. As usual.

Post match Havok comes out for a showdown with Slamovich.

We get part two of the Josh Alexander’s Slammiversary ad, as he looks at the crate with the old TNA logo. He opens the crate and we get a highlight package of the company’s history.

Raj Singh and Shera yell about Bhupinder Gujjar not joining them. Gujjar comes in and says let’s settle this in the ring. Singh laughs about him being by himself, but W. Morrissey comes in to say Gujjar isn’t alone. Deal.

Tag Team Titles: Briscoes vs. Violent By Design

The Briscoes are defending and it’s still bizarre to see them here. Doering and Mark start things off with Doering shoving him down. Jay comes in and locks up with Doering, who hands it off to Deaner pretty quickly. The champs take over on Deaner and put him in the corner for some elbows to the face. Deaner gets stomped down in the corner before being thrown outside. The Bang Bang elbow connects but Doering gets in a shot to the face as we take a break.

Back with Jay getting slammed and elbowed for two but he manages to get over for the tag to Mark. That means house can be cleaned, including Deaner being thrown off the top for two. A powerbomb gets the same but Doering posts Mark on the floor. Doering spinebusters Jay for two and Deaner’s top rope headbutt is good for the same. Mark is back in but the Doomsday Device is broken up. While Mark is dealing with Doering, Jay rolls Deaner up to retain at 13:58.

Rating: C+. After watching them for years, it is great to see the Briscoes on a slightly bigger stage and they are every bit as good here as they are in Ring of Honor. They are instantly the best team around here and that could be the case for a long time to come. Violent By Design isn’t the most thrilling team and now that they’re gone, the Briscoes can move on to someone else, perhaps the Good Brothers.

Post match Eric Young comes in to help with the beatdown but Josh Alexander comes in for the save to end the show and probably set up the six man next week.

Overall Rating: C+. We’ll call this one good enough, as Impact is on its way to Slammiversary and that could be a solid show. What matters is that they are setting up the card, or at least the pieces of the card, and you can see some of the show from here. Young vs. Alexander could be turned into something big, though they still have a long way to go to make it happen. Nice show this week, as they aren’t coming off of a bad post pay per view show for a change.

Results
Mike Bailey b. Laredo Kid – Rollup
Jordynne Grace/Taya Valkyrie/Mia Yim b. Deonna Purrazzo/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans – Eat Defeat to Evans
Good Brothers b. Matt Taven/Mike Bennett – Gun Stun to Bennett
Masha Slamovich b. Shawna Reed – Snowplow
Briscoes b. Violent By Design – Rollup to Deaner

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Mouse’s Wrestling Adventures – Fright Night: Little Flippy Doo Action

Mouse’s Wrestling Adventures: Fright Night
Date: October 11, 2019
Location: The Arena, Jeffersonville, Indiana
Commentators: Nick Miller, Chad Green

Assuming it is the same one, Mouse is someone who I have seen around on another show but don’t know much about him. Either way, this seems to be his (or someone named Mouse) show, which could go all over the place. I have no idea what is coming on this thing and that makes for a nice feeling. Let’s get to it.

Keep in mind I have never seen this promotion before so I apologize if I miss any plot or character bits.

We open with a Halloween theme, including clips from Hocus Pocus and Ernest Scared Stupid. Oh yeah I’m in the right place.

Logan Stunt vs. Cole Radrick

Logan is Marko’s brother and Cole is a pretty basic looking guy who can do good things in the ring. Radrick takes him to the mat to start as commentary (I have absolutely no idea if those names are right but it’s the closest I could get to what they were saying is in need of an early fix as it is BADLY distorted). A suplex sends Stunt into the corner but he’s back with a jumping knee to knock Radrick to the floor. The big suicide dive knocks Radrick into the fans, as there are no barricades here.

Back in and Radrick’s bridging butterfly suplex gets two but he misses a middle rope moonsault (commentary: “Little flippy doo action.”). A running knee gives Stunt two and it’s time for the slugout. Radrick knocks him into the ropes for a big running boot but Stunt manages to knock him outside. Back in and Radrick grabs a backpack Stunner into a running knee to the back of the head (BOOM!) for a rather near fall. A butterfly powerbomb finally puts Stunt away at 7:15.

Rating: C. They certainly started fast here and the fans are VERY hot for this show. Stunt is similar enough to his brother that he can get the sympathy while also being a bit bigger to keep things from being entirely ridiculous. Throw in a lack of floss dancing and this was an instant upgrade over most Marko matches.

The house band plays, because we have a house band.

Tom Hanks Memorial Battle Scramble

This is a Royal Rumble with thirty second intervals, but once we get down to five, a special entrant comes in to turn it into a six way scramble with pinfalls for eliminations. Also there might have been something about fans being allowed to throw people back in but it wasn’t easy to understand. Ace Perry is in at #1 and the Arena Phantom is in at #2 with the rather small Phantom sending him outside (not out) and backflipping into a pose back inside.

Back in and a big boot and suplex rock the Phantom as Levi Everett (he looks Amish) is in at #3. He takes his sweet time going around the ring to shake every hand he can though, leaving Perry to hit a low superkick on the Phantom. The claw has the Phantom down again but…some unnamed wrestler comes in to take Perry down. Reilly MaGuire is in at #4 and gets German suplexed by Perry.

The Phantom manages to skin the cat to stay alive and it’s Hoodfoot (Maybe) (that’s what the graphic says) in at #5, even as Levi is still on the floor shaking hands. Reilly tornado DDTs the unnamed guy and Trigga Travis is in at #6. Levi and another unnamed wrestler get in at the same time, but here is Adam Slade in at #8 (I guess?). Levi, the second unnamed guy and Slade seem to be part of the Lost Boys and it’s Levi snapping Reilly’s arm.

Step Stool Sarah, who might be a backstage worker, is in at #9 and hits a Stunner (because she’s in a Steve Austin jersey) before trying to eliminate herself….but she gets stuck on the top. Chris Copeland is in at #10 and the brawling continues until Jack Andrews is in at #11. The Phantom is eliminated off camera and it’s Loki Havok (Commentary: “He’s an odd bird.”) in at #12 to clean house.

Patrick Heeter is in at #13 as commentary has no idea who is in or how many are left. Nolan Edward is in at #14 and with nothing happening, Righteous Jesse is in at #15. Heeter knocks him straight down and puts him in the Tree of Woe for….us to cut to another wrestler who doesn’t get a graphic on his entrance. Whoever he is he’s in at #16 as there might be another entrant drinking in the crowd. Someone carrying a bag walks back through the entrance and it’s Danhausen in at #17.

We haven’t had commentary for a few minutes now and the handheld camera work isn’t helping. Lord Crewe is in at #18 and eliminates two unnamed guys in similar tights. Havok goes Joey Ryan by no selling a testicular claw, only to be tossed a second later. Another unnamed guy is tossed and a clothesline puts the original unnamed guy out, all at the hands of Crewe. There goes Heeter as well as the ring is rapidly clearing out. A toss powerbomb sends someone else onto the pile but Danhausen rallies the troops to go after Crewe.

Danhausen pours teeth into Crewe’s mouth and boots him out, leaving us with five. That means the special entrant can come in and it’s….the Wilson volleyball from Cast Away. This freaks Crewe out and has him in tears of apology, but Wilson starts talking to him. Wilson is thrown inside, where he chokeslams Everett. Then Wilson breaks up a superplex attempt and hits a super hurricanrana, followed by what I think is a Canadian Destroyer on Reilly.

Danhausen sizes him up, inserts a tooth, and stomps away. Now it’s time for the piano mat from Big, allowing Danhausen to dance and hit people in the head with Wilson. That’s enough piano and Wilson is chucked over the top and onto some of the wrestlers at ringside. Slade hits a springboard dive to take everyone down on the floor again, followed by Reilly moonsaulting off the top to take them all down again. Back in and a superplex sends Slade into the pile again, leaving a fan to ask “what the f*** is happening”.

Danhausen hits a slingshot German suplex and a running knee for two on Perry but Reilly kicks Wilson into him. Slade gives Reilly a running Canadian Destroyer but Perry hits him with a running Death Valley Driver into the corner for another two. Then Wilson Stuns Danhausen, leaving Levi to hit a top rope headbutt for two on Wilson, as this really needs to wrap up already. Another top rope headbutt is enough to finish Wilson and give Levi the pin at 32:00.

Rating: D+. There were a lot of fun moments, but this was WAY too long and it hurt things a lot. There were also far too many people, with a lot of them only there so Crewe could toss them out. I’ve seen matches like this one several times before and they almost all wind up having the same issues. I didn’t hate it, but I was ready for it to end about ten minutes early. Throw in commentary being gone for over half of the match and I was more lost than anything else.

Lee Moriarty vs. Shawn Kemp

Kemp is a rather good sized guy with a bunch of dog nicknames. Commentary is back as Moriarty hits a big springboard armdrag into a dropkick to put Kemp on the floor. Back in and Kemp runs him over with a crossbody, setting up the chinlock. Moriarty gets a boot up in the corner though and a top rope stomp to the arm lets him strike away. A suplex doesn’t work on Kemp, who hits a Judas Effect into a Psycho Driver for two.

Another shot to the arm slow Kemp down and a quick suplex gives Moriarty two more. A clothesline sets up a Fujiwara armbar (with finger twisting) but Kemp is in the ropes. With the holds not working, Moriarty takes him up top but a swinging fisherman’s buster brings him right back down. Back up and Kemp hits an enziguri into…something that doesn’t work as the arm gives out. What looked to be an F5 gives Moriarty the pin at 10:23.

Rating: C+. This took some time to get going but eventually they settled down into Moriarty picking him apart with the focus on the arm. I can always go for someone being that solid technically and Moriarty was on it here. Kemp is another big yet athletic guy, though he is going to need a bit more tho make him stand out.

Brett Ison vs. Calvin Tankman vs. Dominic Garrini

Hoss battle so it’s a chop circle to start. We’ll make that a punch circle as things get a little more intense early on. Ison gets double teamed down but Tankman Pounces Garrini to send him outside. A backbreaker into a clothesline drops Ison again but he dives back in to make a save.

Tankman BLASTS Garrini with a chop, only to have Garrini triangle choke him down. Ison is back up so Garrini gives him a German suplex, which doesn’t have much effect. Ison mixes things up with a Styles Clash, drawing Tankman back in for the save. Back up and Ison elbows the heck out of Tankman for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C+. They didn’t try to do anything out of the ordinary here, as you had three big monsters hitting each other until one of them couldn’t kick out. That’s all it was supposed to be and I had fun watching them beat on each other. Those chops were great and I liked it ending with a shot to the face instead of something more complicated, as it kind of fits the theme.

Baka Gaijin vs. Naturally Gifted

That would be Madman Pondo/2 Tuff Tony (from Juggalo Championship Wrestling) vs. Bradley Prescott IV/Chase Holliday. Naturally Gifted seems to be part of the Lost Boys, and come out to the theme Rich Swann uses when he isn’t in Impact. Prescott has quite a bit of beer on his way to the ring and we get in-ring entrances, with Pondo and Tony insisting that they go first. It’s a brawl to start with Prescott and Holliday being beaten down on the floor as this is rather one sided early on.

Back in and a barbed wire bat to the back has Holliday screaming but Prescott is back up with a beer. That’s fine with Tony, who comes up with a bottle of vodka. There’s a pumpkin rolling around on the floor as Tony and Prescott try each others’ drinks (that’s just not sanitary). They trade sides and it’s Holiday avoiding a stop sign shot. An STO and basement dropkick get two on Pondo, followed by Prescott adding a jumping Stunner.

A Van Daminator (with a case of beer instead of a chair) gets two on Tony, who is back up with Pondo for a double elbow. Holliday is hung over the top for a flipping legdrop, drawing Prescott over for a save this time. The stop sign shot rocks Prescott and Tony hits (mostly) a Lionsault to make it worse. Pondo brings in a cinder block and a sledgehammer (commentary: “Somebody gonna die.”). The block is put between Holliday’s legs and crushed by the sledgehammer, setting up a fireball to finish Prescott at 9:50.

Rating: D-. I can’t stand this kind of stuff and it was little more than a squash for Pondo and Tony. They’re big guys who can’t move very well but they’re TOUGH, meaning they can do a bunch of stuff and not sell anything. The match wasn’t funny and was a way for the two of them to look great at the others’ expense, which isn’t so much interesting as much as it is annoying. Really not a fan of these guys and this didn’t make that any better.

Billie Starkz vs. Hawlee Cromwell

Cromwell jumps her during her entrance but Starks gets in a few kicks to take over. A clothesline gives Starkz two but Cromwell sends her into the corner for a running kick to the head. They slug it out on the apron with Cromwell getting the better of things, setting up a dropkick to the side of the head for two. Some forearms rock Cromwell in the corner and she charges into a boot to the face to make it worse.

I think they try a suplex to the floor but land on the ropes, resulting in a nasty looking fall to the floor. Back in and Cromwell grabs a swinging facebuster for two, followed by something like a Death Valley Driver/Air Raid Crash for the same. Starkz grabs a fisherman’s suplex for two and a sunset driver (with Cromwell’s head not even approaching the mat) for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t feeling this one again as they weren’t exactly the most polished out there. Starkz is someone I’ve seen a few times before and she can have a good enough match but that wasn’t the case here. The execution didn’t quite work here and it was one of those matches that lost me pretty quickly, which is never a good sign.

The Carnies vs. The Night Ryderz

That would be Kerry Awful/Nick Iggy/Tripp Cassidy vs. Aaron Williams/Alex Colon/Dustin Rayz. The brawl is on before the bell with the Carnies beating them down both in and outside. We settle down to Colon getting crotched on the post and the choking in the corner drawing in the rest of the Ryderz for a failed save attempt. Everything breaks down with Colon getting kneed and suplexed for two.

The brawl heads to the floor as commentary hasn’t bothered to tell us who these people are, so we’re stuck with wild brawling and general insanity. The Carnies choke Colon in the corner and kick Williams (thanks commentary) in the head. Colon and Williams are back with double kicks and stereo suicide dives, leaving Rayz to clean house inside.

A DDT plants Iggy for two with Cassidy shoving the referee for the save. Awful is back in with a chokebomb to Colon, who pops up with a piledriver and a crucifix for two on Iggy. Colon and Iggy chop it out until Awful plants Williams for two, with Colon making the save. A hanging DDT/top rope double stomp drops Iggy on his head for the pin at 8:24.

Rating: C. This was the kind of brawl that you knew was coming on a show like this and that may or may not be a good thing. The lack of knowing who was who didn’t really matter in the end but it’s nice to at least know their names as they’re brawling. Either way, it was a good enough brawl, even if there have been a lot of wild fights on the show so far tonight.

Before the main event, Marko and Logan Stunt get in the ring to goof around a bit.

Grindhouse Pro Title: Freddie Hudson vs. Tyler Matrix vs. The Kenway

Hudson is defending. Matrix jumps both of them to start fast, including a belt shot to Hudson. They head outside where Hudson loses his shirt but Kenway is back in with a fisherman’s….something, which is countered into a small package for two. Hudson and Kenway slug it out until Matrix comes back in to run them over. Matrix superkicks Kenway to the floor and tells the fans to move, setting up the suicide dive.

Another dive drops Matrix and Kenway, leaving everyone down on the floor. Back in and Matrix hits a Canadian Destroyer on Hudson, followed by Kenway hitting one on Matrix. Not to be outdone, Hudson is up with a middle rope Canadian Destroyer to Kenway to leave everyone down. Back up and we get the circle slugout with Hudson being knocked down first.

Back up and Hudson slugs it out with Matrix, setting up a standing Sliced Bread for two. Kenway is back in with a rolling German suplex on Hudson, setting up a pumphandle suplex for two more. Matrix grabs a reverse fireman’s carry backbreaker on Kenway, with Hudson having to make a save. Matrix shrugs off Hudson’s poisonrana so Hudson does it again. Kenway is back in with a powerbomb to Hudson, who pops up with a Shining Wizard to retain at 8:24.

Rating: C+. They had me until the ending, when it became a bunch of no selling that always drives me crazy. Matrix has been around the circuit for a bit, including a long time in Ohio Valley Wrestling, and he has had some nice stuff before. Hudson and Kenway were both fine enough, though not exactly standing out from the larger pack.

Respect is shown to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were some good parts here but the bad ones had me losing any reason to care. That battle royal and that Pongo/Tony tag match were death for the show and at least the battle royal overshadowed a lot of the good things going on. The atmosphere was fun though and I had a nice enough time in parts to keep it from being a disaster, but not a very good show for the most part. Also, where was Mouse?

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Impact Wrestling – May 12, 2022: Consider It Thrown Down

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 12, 2022
Location: Promowest Pavilion, Newport, Kentucky
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

We’re done with Under Siege and that means we need a new #1 contender. Josh Alexander successfully defended the World Title against Tomohiro Ishii so now it’s time for something new. That means the return of the Gauntlet For The Gold, a huge gauntlet match, to crown a new #1 contender. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Tom Hannifan and Matthew Rehwoldt are in the ring to hype up the Gauntlet For The Gold.

Video on Gauntlet For The Gold.

Ultimate X Qualifying Match: Chris Bey vs. Kenny King

The winner is in the Ultimate X X-Division Title match at Slammiversary and Maria Kanellis-Bennett is on commentary. King takes him down with a headlock to start but gets armdragged into an armbar. A dropkick puts King on the floor, where he gets knocked down again for a bonus. Back in and King hits some running knees in the corner for two, followed by a snap powerslam for the same.

The neck crank goes on for a bit before King misses a springboard spinning legdrop. Bey’s torture rack neckbreaker gets two but King grabs the Chin Checker into the tiger driver for two. That has Maria VERY fired up and in full cheerleader mode but Bey cuts her off with a slingshot DDT for two of his own. Standing Sliced Bread plants King and Bey goes up, only to have Maria offer a distraction. The Royal Flush sends King to Slammiversary at 8:35.

Rating: C+. Good choice for an opener here as there was almost no way that this wasn’t going to work. King is someone with enough of a resume around here that he is going to tie into the history and feel like a viable challenger so the win is a good idea. Bey losing is a bit weird, but maybe he can get back in there some other way.

Gisele Shaw and Alisha Edwards don’t seem to get along before their Knockouts Tag Team Title shot. Yes, another thrown together team.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Influence vs. Alisha Edwards/Gisele Shaw

Edwards and Shaw are challenging and it’s Edwards rolling Rayne up for some near falls to start. Everything breaks down early and stereo Thesz presses have the champs in trouble as we take a break. Back with Edwards beating on Dashwood until a Rayne distraction cuts her off.

Dashwood grabs a neckbreaker for two and the champs take turns choking in the corner. Rayne’s neckbreaker gets two of her own but Edwards gets over for the hot tag to Edwards without much trouble. House is cleaned, including a spear for two on Shaw. Edwards tags herself back in though and it’s the double Stroke to retain the titles at 11:07.

Rating: C-. With the IInspiration gone, I continue to not exactly see the need for these titles to exist. Until some more teams are built up, they are glorified vanity trophies for the Influence and no one else. As usual, there just isn’t that much depth to support them and it shows more and more every time they get to face another thrown together tag team.

Violent By Design promises to get the Tag Team Titles back next week. For tonight though, Eric Young is winning the Gauntlet For The Gold.

Here is Gail Kim for a chat. She is excited about the 20th anniversary Slammiversary, which means we need something historic. This time around that is going to mean the first ever Queen Of The Mountain match. The five names participating are Tasha Steelz, Chelsea Green, Jordynne Grace, Deonna Purrazzo and….here are Steelz and Savannah Evans to interrupt.

Steelz can’t believe how much Kim is doing to take the title from her but she knows that Evans is going to be the fifth entrant. Actually no, because the fifth entrant is…..MIA YIM! That sends Steelz over the edge but the lights go out and Yim, with minions, is here for the save. Purrazzo comes in to help beat Yim down but Taya Valkyrie and Grace make the real save.

Rich Swann is ready for Gauntlet For The Gold but he also doesn’t think much of Digital Media Champion Matt Cardona.

Bullet Club vs. Tomohiro Ishii/Josh Alexander

Jay White/El Phantasmo for the Club. White and Alexander start things off but we’ll go with Phantasmo before anything can happen. Phantasmo actually takes him to the mat, which isn’t ok with Alexander. That means Phantasmo gets sent into the corner for the tag to White, who gets to face Ishii. White gets run over with a shoulder but it’s too early for the brainbuster. Instead White runs him over and gets to pose a bit, as he likes to do.

The choking on the ropes ensues and it’s back to Phantasmo, only to have Ishii get fired up. Some double teaming slows Ishii down though and it’s White chopping him in the corner. Ishii finally gets in a shot of his own though and the hot tag brings in Alexander to run over Phantasmo. Everything breaks down and the C4 Spike hits White, with Phtantasmo making the save. It’s back to Ishii, who German suplexes Phantasmo and Alexander decks White. The sliding lariat sets up the brainbuster to finish Phantasmo at 10:32.

Rating: B-. Pretty good match here, as the Bullet Club takes a hit. That being said, losing to the World Champion and a star like Ishii is hardly a devastating loss. White vs. Alexander has to be at least a candidate for the Bound For Glory World Title shot assuming it is still a possibility and keeping the two of them mostly apart here was a good idea. Alexander’s roll continues though, and I’m not sure who is supposed to stop him.

The Briscoes, the new Impact Tag Team Champions, are ready for Violent By Design again next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Gauntlet For The Gold

Royal Rumble style, twenty entrants, two minute interval to start then ninety seconds each (weird), regular match when it gets down to two. Chris Sabin is in at #1 and Alex Shelley is in at #2 by the power of coincidence. A battle over wrist control doesn’t get either of them anywhere as commentary talks about the history of Gauntlet For The Gold. Neither can get the better of anything and it’s Eddie Edwards in at #3.

The Guns wisely start in together on Edwards but he clothesliens both of them down in a bit of a surprise. Vincent, also of Honor No More, is in at #4 to give us a mini tag match. Oddly the Guns get the better of things when their odds are worse and it’s Steve Maclin in at #5. The Guns are dropped again and it’s Maclin working with Honor No More (though he doesn’t seem happy to do so) until Shark Boy makes his return at #6.

The Chummer hits Maclin and the Guns are back up to help clean house. A double Chummer hits Honor No More and we take a break. Back with Shark Boy gone, Raj Singh having come in at #7, Trey Miguel having come in at #8 and Bhupinder Gujjar coming in at #9. Gujjar beats up and elimiantes Singh, because that is the only reason these two exist around here.

Shera is in at #10 and slugs it out with Gujjar with Shera getting the better of things. W. Morrissey is in at #11 and gets to clean house, including eliminating Shera and Vincent. Eric Young is in at #12 and hits Morrissey with a hockey mask, setting up the piledriver. Young blocks Gujjar’s skinning the cat attempt and tosses him out and Maclin hits Miguel with an Irish Curse.

Johnny Swinger, in a mini Wrestlemania III ring cart (as powered by Zicky Dice in a hilarious bit) wacks to the ring like a Bushwhacker, is in at #13, gets tossed, and wacks his way out as we take another break. Back again with Black Taurus having come in at #14, Heath having come in at #15 and having to be saved by Rhino at #16. The Gore hits Edwards and he gets tossed out as we see Shelley being eliminated during the break.

Moose is in at #17 and tosses Taurus and Rhino in short order. Heath slugs away at Moose and gets tossed as well but it’s Rich Swann in at #18 to get the numbers back up a bit. Swann hits Moose with a Lethal Injection but Young slows him down with a low blow. Matt Cardona’s….music plays, as Matthew Rehwoldt is in at #19 to toss Swann from behind. PCO is in at #20 and gets to clean some house, including eliminating Rehwoldt.

Morrissey and PCO get the big slugout (with Morrissey TOWERING over him) until Maclin tosses both of them in an impressive feat. That gives us a final four of Moose, Young, Maclin and Sabin, with Moose being the only one standing. Then the lights go back and it’s Sami Callihan (who returned at Under Siege) to get rid of Moose. Rage seems to be implied as we’re down to three.

Maclin and Young start stomping on Sabin in the corner but he’s back up with a double clothesline. Sabin manages to send Maclin to the apron though and some dropkicks put him down,meaning it’s Sabin vs. Young in a regular match for the title shot. Young knocks him down and hits the top rope elbow for two, plus a clothesline for the same. Sabin is back with a tornado DDT for the same but the Cradle Shock is countered into a piledriver to give Young the pin and the title shot at 36:34.

Rating: C+. The best thing that you can say about a match like this is that it didn’t drag and they managed to make it work here. They even had some comic relief with Swinger and Shark Boy in there to make things a bit more fun. As for Young winning….I guess it works, though it doesn’t exactly feel like something that should be headlining what is often their best show of the year. Maybe it winds up working, but it isn’t exactly exciting.

Overall Rating: B-. This show was built around one match and that match wound up doing rather well. That is a rare change of pace for Impact, as they rarely come out hot after a bigger show. Hopefully they can keep that up, as Slammiversary could be quite the success if they put everything together well. They have a main event set, and while it could be good, they might have their work cut out for them to make the card feel that important. It can be done, but it won’t be the easiest trick.

Results
Kenny King b. Chris Bey – Royal Flush
Influence b. Gisele Shaw/Alisha Edwards – Double faceplant to Edwards
Tomohiri Ishii/Josh Alexander b. Bullet Club – Brainbuster to El Phantasmo
Eric Young won Gauntlet For The Gold last eliminating Chris Sabin

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Star Pro Wrestling: Spring Break In Sellersville: The Producers

Spring Break In Sellersville
Date: March 7, 2020
Location: Forrest Lodge VFW, Sellersville, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Billy Avery, Doc Diamondfire

This is from Star Pro and seems to be another combination of former Chikara and indy wrestlers. These shows can be fun, but it depends on how much they lean into the goofy. The former Chikara wrestlers have some completely insane gimmicks, but you never know what you might be getting. Let’s get to it.

As usual, I have no idea on any characters or plot points coming in so please bear with me if I miss something.

Our unnamed and tuxedoed host welcomes us to the show, though I can barely understand anything he is saying.

Fenix Fury vs. Icarus

Oh yeah it’s a former Chikara crowd alright. Feeling out process to start until Icarus takes him into the corner and comes out with a belly to back suplex. We hit the seated abdominal stretch, followed by a belly to back suplex to drop Fury again. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Icarus chokes away in the corner. Fury finally gets back up for some flying forearms and a tornado DDT gets two. Back up and Icarus ducks a right hand, setting up a quick Wings Of Icarus (Pedigree) for the pin at 7:23.

Rating: C. Nice stuff here, though Fury doing some more high flying might have been a better idea. Icarus is someone who has been around this area for a very long time and it makes sense to start with someone the fans are going to know. I haven’t seen much of Icarus as a heel, but he was certainly getting on the fans’ nerves here. Maybe not the best choice for an opener, but a good enough match.

South Philly’s Finest vs. Shinobi Shadow Squad

That would be Jimmy Konway/Luca Brazzi vs. Eli Isom/Ryan Nova, the latter of whom were regulars in the last few years of Ring Of Honor. Before the match, the Finest want to know why Nova is missing part of his pants. Brazzi takes Nova into the corner to start and it’s an early standoff. Nova takes Brazzi down but lets him go and chills on the top rope. That doesn’t work for Brazzi, who slaps him in the back of the head, causing Nova to…throw a ninja star? Eh it brought Edge and Christian together.

Since that didn’t work (I’m as shocked as you are), it’s off to Isom, who gets elbowed in the face and has his nipples twisted in the corner (yep). Nova is dragged in as well and send into Isom in the corner to put them both down. Another shoulder to the ribs puts Nova on the floor but Isom is back up with a dropkick to send Brazzi outside. Isom chokes Brazzi a bit so Nova can get in a suplex as I’m not sure who the fans are supposed to be behind here.

The chinlock goes on, with Isom even stomping his feet on the mat for…well ok it doesn’t add anything. Other than maybe some percussion. Brazzi fights up and tries to dive over for the tag but gets caught in a release northern lights suplex. Some headbutts to the ribs aren’t enough to get Brazzi over to the ropes and a dive through Isom’s legs is cut off as well. Brazzi FINALLY kicks Isom away….but Nova pulls Konway to the floor. That leaves Isom to hit a release German suplex for a rather arrogant two as the beating continues.

The arrogance wakes Brazzi up enough (make your own Rick Martel jokes) for him to get over to gag in Konway, meaning house can be cleaned. Isom breaks up Sliced Garlic Bread (awesome) but Brazzi punches both of them in the face over and over. A wheelbarrow faceplant with a Stomp gets two on Brazzi with Konway making the save. Konway is sent outside, leaving Brazzi tho hit Sliced Garlic Bread to finish Nova at 13:45.

Rating: B-. This was your straight formula tag match and once I figured out that the Squad were the villains, the match got a lot better. I wouldn’t have bet on the two of them being effective heels but they managed to make it work well enough here. The Finest have been around for a few years but I haven’t seen them before, which is kind of a surprise as they’re not bad.

Isom has to carry Nova out.

Star Pro has a dojo. Well of course they do.

Frightmare vs. Dan Champion

Frightmare is a bit supernatural and Champion is a rather muscular guy. The much smaller Frightmare’s running clotheslines have no effect so Frightmare goes to the eyes to stagger Champion. A running shot knocks Champion to the floor and Frightmare follows him out with some sauntering in between each shot. Back in and Champion cuts off a crossbody, setting up a rather delayed suplex (that’s what you get for sauntering).

The running corner clotheslines work a bit better for Champion, at least until Frightmare kicks him in the shoulder. For some reason Frightmare tries a suplex, even though Champion has about eight inches and a hundred pounds on him. Frightmare goes after the knee to take Champion down and there’s the standing moonsault for two.

A running boot in the corner rocks Champion again and his knee gives out on a whip from corner to corner. The Kneecalepsy (moonsault knees) misses for Frightmare though and Champion low bridges him to the floor. Back in and a heck of a TKO gets two on Frightmare, leaving Champion a bit stunned. Some more kicks to the leg put him down and now Kneecalepsy can finish for Frightmare at 9:20.

Rating: C. Another completely watchable match here, though the smaller Frightmare as the villain was a little odd. Granted that is because Champion is bigger than Drew McIntyre, which makes for some limited options. Frightmare was one of the top heels in Chikara, but it doesn’t work as well without the complete insanity that the company could offer. Champion is an ok big man, but I’m not sure I can imagine him going much further.

Veda Scott vs. Logan Easton LaRoux

LaRoux is a rather obnoxious (and rather rich) heel who I’ve seen good things from before. He is from “a gated community inside a gated community surrounded by a gated community” and is billed as the Champion of the 1% in case you need a better idea. Feeling out process to start, with LaRoux working on the finger for some small joint manipulation.

Scott sends him to the floor, only to have LaRoux snap the throat across the rope. Back in and some arm cranking on the ropes ensues, setting up the chinlock. Scott fights up and kicks him in the head a few times, setting up a bulldog for two. Back up and LaRoux hits a spear for two, followed by Scott hitting one of her own for the same. LaRoux misses a charge into the corner and it’s a fisherman’s suplex to give Scott the pin at 7:03.

Rating: C-. This was one of those intergender matches where you could tell that things weren’t going at top speed and it hurt things a bit. The good thing is that Scott is talented enough to make something like this work. I haven’t seen her in the ring in a bit and I had forgotten how good she can be when she is out there. LaRoux is someone I could go with seeing more of as well, but he might need to change things up a bit in a world where MJF exists.

Junior Heavyweight Title: Billy Avery vs. Jixx vs. Joe Clyde vs. Markus Skyler

Jixx, with his painted face, is defending and it is one fall to a finish. Avery left the commentary booth for the match and appears to weigh about 130lbs. Skyler has a large bag with him and seems to be popular. Clyde on the other hand looks like Trevor Murdoch if you deflated him a bit. Before the bell, Jixx, who seems to be about Rey Mysterio’s height, grabs the mic and insults Sellersville. He then turns around and has all three challengers waiting on him with a triple dropkick.

That’s enough to send Jixx to the floor, with Clyde joining him for…uh, a beer. Avery takes Skyler down but it’s Clyde coming back in to tackle Avery up against the ropes. Jixx is back in with a dropkick to Clyde and it’s a moonsault onto all three challengers on the floor at once. Back in and Jixx gets two on Skyler before they both head back in. That leaves Clyde to suplex Avery for two, followed by a DDT for the same. They switch off again, leaving Jixx to rake Skyler’s eyes and choke in the corner.

A running shot in said corner gets two and Jixx is frustrated, at least partially due to losing his face paint. Clyde comes back in to take Jixx down for a change, meaning it’s time to go up for the required Tower Of Doom. It’s Avery up first and getting to clean house, including a chop off with Jixx. Avery knocks Jixx down but gets F5’d by Clyde, who is taken down by a Canadian Destroyer from Jixx. Skyler is back up as well though and it’s a bridging northern lights suplex to pin Jixx for the title at 11:48.

Rating: B-. It was a fun match with some good high flying, but it’s also the kind of match that you have seen done a hundred times. Skyler stood out a bit here, while Avery is just WAY too small to take seriously and Clyde feels like he should be a heavyweight. Jixx felt like the latest in a long line of spooky/supernatural characters and seeing him lose was kind of nice as a result.

Razerhawk/Green Ant/Wheeler Yuta vs. Young Dumb N Broke

That would be Ellis Taylor/Griffin McCoy/Jordan Oliver with manager Charlie Tiger. Ant sends Taylor running to the floor to start before grabbing a full nelson back inside. A springboard armdrag takes Ant down but it’s quickly off to the technical stuff. That doesn’t go well for Taylor, so we’ll try McCoy vs. Yuta instead. The technical off goes to Yuta again (shocking I know) before they do a weird mirroring sequence.

Yuta rolls him up for two so it’s off to Razerhawk vs. Oliver to complete the trilogy. Razerhawk takes him down by the arm and cranks on the wrist so it can be back to Yuta. Tiger offers a quick distraction though, allowing the villains to collectively drop Yuta and take over. McCoy stomps on the mat and in the corner and it’s Oliver coming back in with a front facelock. Yuta can’t slip through Oliver’s legs but he can catch Oliver’s kick…only to get poked in the eye.

Taylor and McCoy start taking turns on Yuta’s arm, causing Razerhawk and Ant to have to be held back. The chinlock goes on but Yuta fights up and FINALLY dives over to Ant for the hot tag. House is cleaned rather quickly, at least until Taylor knees him in the face. Everything breaks down and Razerhawk hits a missile dropkick on McCoy. A splash off of Yuta’s shoulders gets two and Yuta Angle Slams Oliver for a bonus.

The villains fight up and clear Ant out, leaving McCoy and Yuta to slut it out. Taylor is back in with a kick to Yuta and a brainbuster onto the knee puts him down. Ant grabs a Samoan driver on Taylor but gets Tombstoned by Oliver. Back in and Razerhawk hits a backslide slam for two on Oliver. McCoy gets pulled into Yuta’s Sharpshooter, which draws in Tiger. That’s broken up as well and it’s a running Meltzer Driver (minus the springboard) for the pin on Yuta at 18:01.

Rating: C+. This got some time to make the match work a bit better, but it was a bit much to watch that long of a sequence without anything resembling a tag. I know it’s the style and expected and all that jazz, but couldn’t you at least pay it some lip service? Oliver will be getting better at his size, though the other five are all so small that it is difficult to get that invested.

Ophidian vs. Danny Duggan

During the entrances, Duggan says he hopes the ring announcers gets the Coronavirus so he never has to see him again. Duggan, who looks like an Anderson, bails to the ropes to start but powers Ophidian into the corner. Ophidian misses a spinning kick to the face but is fine enough to take it to the mat for the required arm control exchange. Back up and Duggan grabs a headlock before chopping him into the corner. Duggan grabs him by the throat but Ophidian tries a sleeper of his own.

That isn’t working so some spinwheel kicks rock Duggan instead. The middle rope broke somewhere in there so Duggan is easily sent outside. As Duggan staggers a bit on the floor, Ophidian grabs a chair and has a seat, which doesn’t sit well with Duggan. Back in and Duggan chokes on what is left of the middle rope before slapping on the chinlock. Ophidian fights up and gets a sunset flip, meaning Duggan’s trunks come most of the way down.

Some kicks rock Duggan again but thankfully he gets a clothesline in and fixes the gear. Duggan grabs a spinebuster (again, Anderson) for two and now his arm (which was bandaged coming in) is busted open. A suplex into the corner (which is broken as well) FINALLY finished Ophidian at 13:29, even though the referee didn’t seem to get the count right.

Rating: C-. The fact that the ring literally broke kind of holds this back but it wasn’t a great match in the first place. You can only get so far when things are this limited, though I kept getting bored by the match anyway. Maybe they could do better under the proper circumstances, but dang this wasn’t a great main event.

Post match Duggan thanks the fans for coming out, even if his native Canada is that much better.

Ophidian says something I can’t understand to really wrap up the show.

Overall Rating: C. As you can clearly see, this show feels like the end of the movie The Producers. After nearly doing everything they hoped for, the main stars’ plan falls apart and they lose everything. That doesn’t stop them from trying the same thing again, at least on a smaller budget. That’s what I was feeling here, as this came off like the latest example of trying to put together a Chikara style show without the Chikara presentation. In other words, you’re left with a pretty ok show that I feel like I’ve seen a half dozen times now, often with a similar lineup. Check it out if that’s your thing, but you’re better off finding Chikara.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Mid American Wrestling – September 1, 2002: The Rare Double Failure

Mid American Wrestling
Date: September 1, 2002
Location: KP Classics, Big Bend, Wisconsin

This appears to be a rather small promotion but the thumbnail is CM Punk talking so there should be at least something decent here. I know a few names on the card, but there are some that probably didn’t make it much higher than this. You never know what you are getting from something like this though so let’s get to it.

Keep in mind that I have never seen any of this promotion before so I apologize for missing any storyline or character points. The lack of commentary isn’t going to help either.

Scott Marciano vs. CM Punk

Marciano has some guy and a tall blonde in a short dress with him, while Punk has Dave Prazak to even things out a bit. Before the bell, Punk says a bunch of stuff that I can’t pick up (keep in mind that this is an outdoor show so the audio isn’t great) before saying this will be like old times. Prazak gets the mic and joins Marciano’s Shoot World Order, which causes Punk to end their friendship. Punk says the blonde doesn’t know what this is about, meaning it’s time to explain the idea of straightedge meaning Punk is BETTER THAN YOU.

We get the bell as Punk takes him down into a chinlock, which is reversed into a headlock. Punk switches back into a headlock, followed by an STF. Marciano’s comeback doesn’t last long as Punk slams him down and grabs something like another STF. That’s broken up so they fight over a suplex, with Punk hitting the delayed variety for two.

Prazak is smart enough to low bridge Punk to the floor, where the other guy who came to the ring with Marciano gets in some cheap shots. Back in and they trade rollups before Punk suplexes his way to freedom for a double knockdown. Marciano starts kicking at the legs but Punk sweeps Marciano down. A running knee looks to set up the Pepsi Plunge but the other guy at ringside breaks it up. Instead Punk grabs a Texas Cloverleaf for the tap at 8:47.

Rating: C. Not much of a match here, but you can see the charisma dripping off of Punk, even if it is at a smaller show like this one. Having the angle tacked on at the beginning like this was a little weird, but Punk won pretty convincingly anyway. Marciano was fine enough here, though I didn’t see much in the way of shooting for someone who is part of the SHOOT World Order.

Colt Cabana vs. Ace Steel

For some reason the match order is wrong on the video’s listing but there didn’t seem to be a cut. Cabana would be 22 years old here (and he looks even younger) and is facing one of his trainers (not an uncommon practice). They take their time to start with Steel backing him into the ropes for a clean break. Steel sends him into the corner so Cabana has a breather on the apron.

Back in and Cabana grabs a full nelson of all things, only to get sent to the floor this time. With the holds not working, Cabana misses a running elbow and gets chopped into the corner…as a plane seems to drown out the limited sound for a bit. A knuckle lock doesn’t go well for Steel but he reverses into a headlock as the technical off continues. It’s off to an exchange of armbars but Cabana is back up with a springboard….something to drop Steel.

Cabana starts going after the knee, including a series of stomping and what looks like a kneebar. We’ll make that a spinning toehold but Steel is up again. This time Steel tries a jump over him out of the corner but gets caught in a half Billy Goat’s Curse (that’s a new one). Steel gets to the rope and grabs the arm to pull Cabana down into I guess you would say a reverse Koji Clutch. With that not working, Steel rolls him over for the cradle pin at 13:04.

Rating: C+. This was a much more technical match and you can tell that Cabana doesn’t exactly have the most experience at this point. You also didn’t get to see much of what would make Cabana famous, which is rather strange to see. That being said, what we had here was a nice match with two guys who were able to have a good technical exchange. Yeah Steel was probably walking him through it, but what else is a trainer for?

Post match Steel needs a chair to get out. Cabana says he has no shame in getting pinned by Steel and offers to buy the beers tonight. Not for him because he doesn’t drink, but sure for Steel.

The ring announcer brings out the Furies, who won the Tag Team Titles last night. The Furies (Mitch Blake and Rick Walsh) bring out a guy in an OLD SCHOOL shirt to yell at him, but here are two guys from behind to jump the champs and beat them down. Some shouting suggests that these two are the former champions, better know as the Old School Express (Jason Dukes/Skull Crusher). They wreck one of the champs’ knees and shout a lot before walking off.

Chuck E. Smooth vs. Jarrod The Jackal

Jackal, who cackles a lot, takes Smooth down without much effort and slams him for a bonus. Back up and Smooth elbows him down, setting up a nasty kick to the back of the head for two. Jackal sends him into the corner though and takes over, only to miss the top rope splash. That’s enough for Smooth to grab a quick rollup for the pin at 4:26.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t very good and didn’t have time to get better, though the only thing that stood out was Jackal’s cackling. It felt like there were out there to fill in time and that they kind of did, albeit not much as they weren’t given a ton of time to make it work. Granted neither exactly stood out here as they were both fairly small but didn’t wrestle much of a cruiserweight style.

ODB, with Dave Prazak, comes out for a match with a woman but says she wants to fight a man instead.

ODB vs. Ken Anderson

This is pre-WWE Anderson but you would know that hair anywhere. Anderson says he isn’t doing this but gets kicked in the gut (or maybe lower) and the bell rings. Back up and Anderson is able to kick her out to the floor, meaning frustration is setting in. ODB takes him down without much trouble but gets rolled up for two, which just annoys her more.

A gorilla press attempt is countered into a rollup to give ODB two but she is right back with a testicular claw. ODB’s falling top rope splash misses though and they’re both down for a bit. Anderson tries a powerbomb (with ODB’s trunks being pulled in various ways) but gets rolled up instead. The annoyed Anderson hammers away in the corner, though he has to alternate between Prazak and ODB). The Swanton Bomb is enough to finish ODB at 5:05.

Rating: C-. This was treated as a regular match without a ton of gimmicks so it could have been a lot worse. It’s bizarre to see Anderson as such a young guy without the confidence and character that would make him as famous as he was. ODB was far smaller here than she would become and while the other stood out more, this was a better fit for her as she looked more like Beth Phoenix than anyone else.

Intermission.

Adrian Serrano vs. Brad Bradley

Serrano is the other guy who was with Marciano (who is here, with the blonde and Dave Prazak) earlier. Bradley is better known as Jay Bradley, who has bounced around for a LONG time. Serrano gets thrown around a few times to start and wants a breather in the corner. The much bigger Bradley wants a test of strength and even drops to his knees to make it easier.

Serrano accepts and then Bradley accepts to take him down. A suplex gets Serrano out of trouble but Bradley boots him out to the floor. Serrano gets smart by going after the knee though and kicks Bradley down a few times. That doesn’t work for long on a big guy though, as he catches the kick and cranks on the leg a bit. That doesn’t work for long on a submission guy though, as he switches over to an ankle lock.

Something like an STF goes on but Bradley is up again. Prazak gets on the apron for a distraction, allowing Marciano to get in a shot from behind. Serrano grabs a choke in the corner, with Prazak on the apron so long that the fans are chanting BORING. With Bradley finally passing out, the referee turns around and calls it at 9:24.

Rating: C-. Bradley is a big monster and I can see why he has been around for so long. That being said, the ending was such a mess and the fans weren’t happy with what was going on, as they shouldn’t have been. It went so far beyond the point of being realistic that it was just stupid, which doesn’t make for a good ending. The SWO seems to be a big thing around here, but unless Punk is one of the top names, it doesn’t make a ton of sense to have what seems to be one of their top guys lose in the opener. Either way, not a terrible match here, but I wasn’t getting much from it.

Post match the SWO spray paint Bradley’s chest just to hammer the point home that much more.

Tag Team Titles: Old School Express vs. The Furies

The Furies are defending but one of them has a bad leg. Apparently the injury to (I think) Rick Walsh is so bad that Mitch Blake is going to go this alone. Blake is ORDERED to hand over the titles but he hits Jason Dukes in the head instead and starts fast. An armdrag into an armbar has Dukes down and we settle in a bit. Dukes gets out and heads up, only to get slammed back down.

Skull Crusher shoves down a slam attempt though and it’s Blake in trouble for the first time. The double teaming is on, with the bigger Skull Crusher slamming him down and grabbing a Boston crab. Dukes even shoves Crusher back onto him and they switch places to keep the crab fresh. Crusher drops a knee to make it even worse before grabbing a t-bone suplex. A backbreaker gives Dukes two but here is the limping Walsh to stand on the apron.

Dukes takes his own shirt off and starts slapping his chest, drawing one of the best reactions of the night. Blake fights up and slugs away but refuses to make the tag to the injured Walsh. That just earns Blake another beating but he fights back again, which this time is enough to warrant the tag.

Walsh manages to send them into each other but a shot to the knee brings him back down. The knee is wrapped around the post and the screaming is on, made worse by a spinning toehold from Dukes. Make that a Figure Four from Crusher, followed by another (and worse one) from Dukes to keep things moving. That’s finally enough for Blake, who submits for Walsh at 12:39.

Rating: C. The action wasn’t great, but they had some good storytelling here as Walsh fought through the knee injury as well as he could but his body ultimately gave out on him. That’s a classic story and it worked well here, even if it ends their title reign after one day. Crusher and Dukes are a weird team as it’s like Moose and the Blue Meanie teaming together, minus Meanie’s charisma. Still though, not too bad here.

Here is the Commissioner, whose name I can’t hear, but he is happy that the main event is anything goes and cannot be stopped due to blood. He is also happy that there are some nice people in IWA, including their champion, who is willing to come wrestle around here. This brings out IWA World Champion Chris Hero, who seems to be a good guy this time.

Chris Hero/Dysfunctional vs. Corporal Robinson/Ian Rotten

Anything goes and Dysfunctional’s (smoking) manager is happy that they are going to get to hurt Rotten. Hold on though as Rotten isn’t sure if he and Robinson are on the same page. Robinson swears a lot, which seems to be an affirmative. After Rotten says he’s looking forward to hero trying to get more bookings from him in the future, they go to a test of strength and headbutt each other, with Hero switching to a waistlock.

Rotten gets in a few shots but is knocked into the corner, allowing Hero to take him down into a seated abdominal stretch. That stays on for a bit until Hero starts working on the leg. With that broken up, Robinson comes in as this isn’t exactly insanity so far. Hero knocks Robinson down as well and there’s a kick to the back. It’s already back to Rotten, who pulls up Hero’s shirt and starts headbutting away as things pick up a bit.

A Stunner drops Hero and it’s back to Robinson, who gets taken down by the leg. Dysfunctional comes in for the first time and starts kicking at the leg but Robinson hands it back to Rotten for a (very delayed) Razor’s Edge toss. Some chops, to the chest and the back, followed by some shoulders to the ribs in the corner. Robinson distracts the referee, allowing Rotten to do….absolutely nothing illegal. A chair to the head rocks Dysfunctional and another one busts him open.

Rotten bites at the cut as this is painfully slow so far. We go back to the wrestling with an abdominal stretch, followed by a Banzai Drop for no cover. Robinson’s brainbuster gets two and it’s back to Rotten for right hands to the head. Note that there are minutes going on between anything big, as this is a ridiculously slow match as they’re just walking around between a lot of the moves. Then Robinson turns on Rotten as Hero is gone for some reason.

Robinson and Dysfunctional start double teaming Rotten….and now Hero beats up Dysfunctional. Everything breaks down and the partners are fighting each other on the floor. Back in the ring, Hero backsplashes Dysfunctional as Rotten clotheslines Robinson on the floor. Rotten starts chairing Robinson down before going inside to dropkick Dysfunctional. With Hero and Robinson on the floor, Rotten hits an elevated double underhook DDT for the pin on Dysfunctional at 21:50.

Rating: F. This is a failure in two parts, which is pretty hard to pull off. First of all, you have just how bad things were before we got to the wacky parts. The match was moving as slowly as anything I can remember for a VERY long time and that didn’t make me want to keep watching. Instead of doing anything good here, we got got two guys who don’t seem to have the most intricate arsenals doing bad looking stuff in slow motion for well over ten minutes.

Then the partners started beating each other up because of course they did. I’m going to assume that this is something that would be better explained if you were around more often, but that didn’t exactly help when I’m watching for the first time. Absolutely terrible match with people who didn’t know how to work a match this long, capped off by insanity that DESPERATELY needed some kind of explanation.

Post match the beatdown continues, with Dysfunctional and Robinson taking out Hero. Then they take Rotten over near some big platform and put him on a table, with Robinson diving off to put him through said table on the gravel. Robinson’s (I think?) manager pops up to say that Bull Pain is going to destroy Rotten at the next show. Then we spend a few minutes watching Rotten getting up as Robinson is helped off after doing something so stupid. Then Hero shows up with a chair to check on Rotten to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Even taking into account the low level atmosphere, this show was a chore to sit through, especially after the awful main event. You get the feeling that they would take just about anyone and put them on the show, though that is kind of the point of a smaller company like this. The usual suspects stood out and you could see charisma in certain places, but there was a lot of fine tuning to go and it showed badly in places. Not a good show and I can see why this place wasn’t that well known.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282 W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Daily News Update – May 22, 2022

Make sure you check out some recent reviews.

Rampage – May 20, 2022

Smackdown – May 20, 2022

Kansas Wrestling Revolution Episode One

Huge Title Change On SmackDown, Two Titles Might Be Going Away.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/huge-title-change-smackdown-two-titles-might-going-away/

WATCH: NXT Star Debuts On SmackDown With New Name And Character.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/watch-nxt-star-debuts-smackdown-new-name-character/

Pile Them On: Three New Matches Announced For AEW Double Or Nothing.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/pile-three-new-matches-announced-aew-double-nothing/

Again: AEW Star Confirms Surgery To Fix Another Injury.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/aew-star-confirms-surgery-fix-another-injury/

Big Update On Roman Reigns’ Next Upcoming Challengers.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/big-update-roman-reigns-next-upcoming-challengers/

Very Positive Update On Triple H’s WWE Status.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/positive-update-triple-hs-wwe-status/

WWE Has Limited Options For Ronda Rousey’s Next Challenger.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-limited-options-ronda-rouseys-next-challenger/

WWE Takes Big Step Against Sasha Banks And Naomi.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-takes-big-step-sasha-banks-naomi/

Get A Name Tag: WWE Seems To Make Change To Current Stable.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/get-name-tag-wwe-seems-make-change-current-stable/

Another Detail On Stephanie McMahon’s WWE Departure, Team Mostly Gone.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/another-detail-stephanie-mcmahons-wwe-departure-team-mostly-gone/

WRESTLING RUMORS: WWE May Have Spoiled Major Title Change.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wrestling-rumors-wwe-may-spoiled-major-title-change/

Two Different Plans: WWE Released Edge’s Handpicked Judgment Day Member.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/two-different-plans-wwe-released-edges-handpicked-judgment-day-member/

WWE Offers Medical Update On Two Banged Up Stars.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-offers-medical-update-two-banged-stars/

How Becky Lynch Saved This Week’s Monday Night Raw Main Event.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/wwe-came-new-monday-night-raw-main-event-walkout/

As always, hit up the comments section to chat about what is going on and get on the Wrestling Rumors Facebook page.

Kansas Wrestling Revolution Episode One: The New All Time Low

Kansas Wrestling Revolution Episode One
Date: March 1, 2020
Location: Hoisington City Auditorium, Hoisington, Kansas
Commentator: Pat Stratham

This is something that caught my eye as I went through the IndependentWrestling.TV options as who doesn’t love some wrestling from Kansas? Granted one of the best indy shows I’ve ever seen was Championship Wrestling From Arizona so maybe they’re on to something here. Let’s get to it.

Since this is the first episode, I doubt this will matter, but I know nothing of characters or storylines coming in.

Opening video. One of the wrestlers is carrying what looks like a Money in the Bank briefcase so my worries are already going up.

Danimal vs. Explosivo

Commentary puts over Danimal as a legnd as he grabs an armbar into an armbar to start. Back up and Explosivo chops away in the corner, only to get reversed for chops from Danimal. A running powerslam gives Danimal the pin at 1:42. Well that was quick.

We flash back to February 27, 2019, where someone is in a library. He calls someone (so rude) and tells them to be somewhere at a specific time.

We cut to someone walking and looking at their phone. They go up an alley, where someone else jumps them with a baseball bat. The guy with the bat drops it, and a car pulls up to take him away.

Now we’re in the locker room where a guy in sunglasses (maybe the one from the library but it’s not clear) isn’t happy with having to face Jimmy Armstrong (finally, a name) at Midwest Mania on April 26. It’s a street fight and…that’s it.

Joey Ryan is….I guess coming? Already here? Maybe he left? This show is really bad at explaining things. Apparently he’s the heavyweight champion and he’s back at Midwest Mania II.

Video on a masked guy fighting someone in a singlet, with the referee getting in a superkick.

We aren’t even ten minutes into this show and I have absolutely no idea what is going on.

The highlight continues, including Greg Valentine, a guy in pizza trunks, a man in a shark mask, and a woman with a whip. This video has been going for a few minutes now and it ends with an ad for WrestleVersary. How many big shows are they building towards?

The feed is hacked by some evil sounding voice talking about how the world is run by chaos. We see some clips of a monster with facepaint and a horned sheep mask. He’s debuting in the TV Title tournament. His name: the Black Sheep, Dave Turner.

Paul PuertoRico, with his Puerto Rico themed title, is ready to face Steve Cruze, as the stars have told him to do.

Ad for Mid West Mania II, again featuring Joey Ryan. They’re all in on this guy. Sure hope nothing derails his career and takes away their biggest star.

Paul PuertoRico vs. Steven Cruze

Cruze circles the ring on the floor before the bell as the stalling is on. He finally gets in for the bell but now PuertoRico hides in the corner. A missed charge lets PuertoRico get to the apron but Cruze catches him on top for a slam back down. Cruze hits an elbow to cut PuertoRico down again and there’s a slam to make it worse. The taunting is on, with Cruze standing on PuertoRico’s hand for a bonus.

They head outside for some shots to keep PuertoRico rocked but he’s back in with a running crotch attack to the back of the head (which commentary calls a bulldog). Back in and a missile dropkick drops Cruze but he grabs a suplex to cut that off. Cruze pulls him up at two then hits another suplex, setting up a sleeper for the win at 7:40.

Rating: D. Well that was bad. I’m still not sure why these people are fighting or what their issue was in the first place, but wrestling has been built on less before. The problem is that you need something to draw in interest and that was sorely missing here. Pretty awful match, as Cruze more or less squashed him for a long time.

Post match Danimal and Lunatic Lenny come in to save PuertoRico from….well nothing actually as Cruze let him go but you need something to end the show.

A preview for next week wraps us up.

Overall Rating: F. I have watched a lot of wrestling in my day and I have almost no idea what happened here. I’ve seen shows in languages I don’t understand that made a heck of a lot more sense than this and that isn’t a good sign. There might have been something else before this, but when you have episode ONE as your title, you might want to bother explaining ANYTHING to your audience. This was terrible and probably the new low for a debut episode of any wrestling show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282 W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown – May 20, 2022: Put Them Together And What Do You Have?

Smackdown
Date: May 20, 2022
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We are about two weeks away from Hell In A Cell and I think that means you know what you’re getting. The big story tonight is the Tag Team Title unification match between RKBro and the Usos, which will probably get quite a bit of hype. Other than that, we have a lot more to cover before the pay per view so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going, with Michael Cole saying that if the Usos unify the titles, it will establish the Bloodline as the greatest faction in WWE history. This has been the latest “NO ONE TALKS LIKE THIS” moment. Roman Reigns tells the fans to acknowledge him and then has Paul Heyman tell the people why this night is so important.

Heyman talks about how the Bloodline is amazing, including Roman Reigns, who is better than Hogan, Austin, Sammartino and Cena. Tonight though, the Usos are unifying the Tag Team Titles and beating the best team on Raw to become the greatest tag team of all time (with all due respect to the Wild Samoans). And that is a SPOILER! Roman tells the Usos to deliver what he wants.

Sami Zayn vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Feeling out process to start with Zayn getting the better of things and punching away in the corner. A clothesline lets Zayn choke away on the ropes but Nakamura knocks him off the top. Kinshasa misses though and Sami shoves him off the top and out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Nakamura fighting out of a chinlock and hitting a kick to the head. Zayn sends him outside though and it’s a Falcon Arrow onto the floor. Nakamura beats the count back in, pulls Zayn outside and posts him, but Zayn beats the count. Back in and Kinshasa finishes Zayn at 10:34.

Rating: C. It’s kind of a far cry from the Dallas masterpiece, but at least these two are getting on television with something to do. Nakamura is being built up again in the singles ranks after the Rick Boogs team was derailed so he very well could be set up for some kind of bigger role. Whatever that might actually be.

Video on the Usos.

It’s time for Happy Talk, with Happy Corbin standing next to the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal trophy. Corbin has never been happier and we see a clip of him using the trophy to Pillmanize Madcap Moss’ neck. Corbin talks about being sick of Moss and asks who is laughing now. Then Corbin smashes the trophy.

We look at Gunther chopping the heck out of Drew Gulak last week.

Gunther vs. Drew Gulak

We’re joined in progress with Gulak hitting his own chop, earning himself a kick to the face. A series of chops takes Gulak down and the powerbomb finishes at 1:04.

Post match Gunther puts on the Boston crab but Ricochet runs in for the save. Now this has me interested.

Max Dupri, the head of the hottest male modeling agency, introduces himself to Adam Pearce. Adam had no idea Dupri was coming, but apparently he was signed by Sonya Deville. This is awkward, but Pearce can’t quite pronounce Max Du-PRE! That would be LA Knight, because WWE needed to change THE NAME THAT THEY INVENTED LAST YEAR!

RKBro is ready to beat the Usos.

Shotzi and Aliyah argue about not being able to make it out to the ring to face Ronda Rousey last week. Raquel Rodriguez comes in so Shotzi yells at her, even calling Gonzalez an absurd Amazon.

Shotzi vs. Raquel Rodriguez

Rodriguez powers her into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. Shotzi tries a choke on Rodriguez’s back but gets thrown down again. A fall away slam sets up the twisting Vader Bomb and the Chingona Bomb gives Rodriguez the pin at 2:55. Mostly a squash.

Xavier Woods isn’t happy with Butch beating Kofi Kingston last week. Kofi is on New Day business this week, so Butch can come see him alone.

Sheamus tells Butch to go take care of Xavier Woods.

Butch vs. Xavier Woods

Butch and company (with the company not here tonight) are now dubbed the Brawling Brutes. They start fast with Woods sending him outside but bringing it back inside, where Butch takes him down by the arm. Woods is right back with the Honor Roll for two but Butch kicks him in the head. That’s broken up and Woods grabs Backwoods for the pin at 3:41.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what WWE’s deal is with Butch not being able to beat Woods, but this is the third time that Butch has lost to him via the same move in less than two months. In theory the feud is going to be wrapped up sooner than later, because both teams need to move way on. This is especially true of Butch and Woods, as I don’t know if I get the thinking here.

Post match the Brutes beat Woods down.

Video on RKBro.

Xavier Woods says this ends next week, because he has a partner to face the Brutes.

And now, the big story, as Michael Cole talks about Sasha Banks and Naomi “letting us all down”. Cole explains the walk out and now the titles are vacant, with a tournament coming soon. Banks and Naomi are suspended indefinitely. So yeah, you know those titles that were barely defendable because there were no teams? Well now it’s TOURNAMENT TIME! Also, WWE acting like changing the card at the last minute is the ultimate sin is pretty freaking funny. WWE would NEVER do something like that.

Oh look: the Tag Team Title unification match is next. Sure how WWE doesn’t advertise that and then turn it into a six man tag.

Raw Tag Team Titles/Smackdown Tag Team Titles: RKBro vs. Usos

Winner takes all and Paul Heyman is on commentary. Orton takes Jimmy down to start but Riddle gets taken down into a chinlock. This lets Cole say the Usos are trying to do what the Wild Samoans never did: unify the Tag Team Titles. That would be really impressive for the Samoans to do as THERE WAS ONLY ONE SET OF TITLES TO WIN BACK THEN! Riddle is whipped HARD into the buckle and we take a break.

Back with Riddle having suffered a bruised hip off that whip but he’s fine enough to keep going. A hard belly to back suplex cuts off the hot tag attempt but Riddle strikes his way over to the ropes for the tag. Orton comes in and starts cleaning house, with the RKO hitting Jimmy. Jey makes the save and pulls Jimmy over for the tag. Orton gets kicked into the corner for the tag back to Riddle, who suplexes various Usos. The super RKO is loaded up but Roman Reigns comes out to grab Riddle. Jey shoves him off the top and it’s a Superfly Splash for the pin and the titles at 11:35.

Rating: B-. RKBro is the only team that could hang with the Usos at this point but there was little reason to believe that the Usos weren’t going to have both sets of titles sooner or later. WWE doesn’t need to have two sets of titles so the Usos having the one remaining set is the right choice. Now just find some teams who could give them a run for their money, which is easier said than done.

Post match the big beatdown is on, with Riddle being choked out. The Superfly Splash through the announcers’ table crushes Riddle and we cut to a fan crying in a great visual. Reigns chokes Orton out too. The Bloodline poses with all six belts to end the show. Cool shot, but three people having six titles doesn’t make me impressed. It makes me think there are too many belts. Also, Riddle vs. Reigns at the pay per view should be good.

Overall Rating: C+. Not too bad of a show here with the Tag Team Title match being the biggest deal. I fully expect a rematch to take place at the pay per view but for now, the Usos having the titles is the way to go. Other than that, I want to see Gunther vs. Ricochet, which is someone stepping up to a bigger level. That’s not a bad show, with some other good things sprinkled in.

Then you have the Banks/Naomi reaction and…that is up there on the all time list of hypocritical WWE responses. Banks and Naomi did indeed walk out, but WWE acting like making some last minute change to an advertised match is this unpardonable offense had me laughing quite hard. It’s weird for WWE to actually do what they say they are going to do from one week to the next, but now it’s horrible for Banks and Naomi to do the same thing? That’s a very WWE reaction and I don’t mean that in a good way.

Results
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Sami Zayn – Kinshasa
Gunther b. Drew Gulak – Powerbomb
Raquel Rodriguez b. Shotzi – Chingona Bomb
Xavier Woods b. Butch – Backwoods
Usos b. RKBro – Superfly Splash to Riddle

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