Smackdown – January 6, 2005: If They Just Have To Do This

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 6, 2005
Location: Mohegan Sun, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re in a new year and it’s time to start building towards the Royal Rumble, featuring another Undertaker vs. Heidenreich match. I’m not sure why anyone would be looking forward to that but hopefully it wraps up their feud once and for all. Other than that, John Cena is looking like the star of stars and I’m thinking that has some potential. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Fallout from last week’s Tag Team Title match. Rey brings out the 619 Cam but Eddie steals it for some filming of guest timekeeper Joy Giovanni. We get started with Rey snapping off a headscissors but getting caught in a test of strength. That’s broken up with Rey climbing onto Eddie’s back for two off a sunset flip, meaning it’s an early standoff. Back up and it’s another headscissors to rattle Eddie some more.

Rey charges again but this time he gets faceplanted down, setting up an armbar on the right (not left Cole) arm. The hammerlock goes on for a good bit until Rey makes the rope, with Eddie not letting go immediately. Rey tries a moonsault but gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a dropkick to the ribs. Eddie misses a charge though and crotches himself against the post as we take a break.

Back with Rey holding something like an abdominal stretch on the mat before switching to an armbar. An exchange of sleepers goes to Rey, followed by a springboard armdrag. Rey gets two off a Lionsault and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up so Rey dropkicks him into the ropes, only to miss the 619. Eddie chills in the corner so Rey tries a Bronco Buster, which is blocked with a raised boot.

It was NOT a low blow though (Eddie promises) so Rey takes him up top but the hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb. A missed charge bumps the referee though and Eddie has an idea. It’s the old grab the title spot so he throws it to Rey….who throws it right back and drops down as the referee gets up.

Eddie crawls around on his stomach to hide the title and INSISTS that he did not use the belt. He tries to crawl over and throw it away but gets caught, giving us a hilarious look on his face. Rey cracks up and Eddie tries to convince the referee that it means Rey did it. That’s almost a double DQ but Eddie’s begging keeps the match going….and lets Rey small package him for the pin.

Rating: B-. Well of course these two had a fun match, but the ending was hysterical with Eddie going so over the top when he had no idea what to do in the situation. His NO and HE’S LAUGHING got some actual laughter and they did it for the right reason. How often do you get that in wrestling?

Post match Rey shakes an unenthusiastic Eddie’s hand.

Heidenreich thanks Paul Heyman for coming to help him with the casket stipulation. For some reason, Heyman is treated like a big reveal here and isn’t shown until a little bit into Heidenreich’s speech. Heyman promises to fix things.

Cruiserweight Title: Funaki vs. Akio

Funaki is defending and Carlito, with his petition, is on commentary. Hang on actually as Carlito gets a signature from the cameraman and some fans. Funaki starts fast with an armdrag to send Akio outside, followed by some rollups for two each. Carlito isn’t done though and even gets inside, asking the referee and wrestlers for signatures.

With Carlito sent outside (sans signatures), it’s time to get some security guards to sign. Akio’s enziguri gets two and it’s off to a quickly broken armbar. Funaki hits a bulldog for two as Carlito is asking more fans for signatures. Akio misses a corkscrew moonsault and gets DDTed off the middle rope for the pin.

Rating: D. What were you expecting here? This was all about Carlito’s deal and does very little to make me want to see the cruiserweights for the time being. You can’t put a squash match in there instead of a title match? Hopefully they don’t do any more of this stuff, or at least not in a match that should matter.

Post match Joy won’t sign so Carlito spits apple on her. I do not find this to be cool.

Heyman and Heidenreich try to talk Long out of the casket match at the Royal Rumble. Violence seems to be threatened so Long gives Heidenreich an offer: If he can beat Undertaker tonight, he gets to pick a new stipulation. Oh and we’ll make it a handicap match with Heyman involved. Heyman: “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND???”

Kurt Angle meets with Luther Reigns and Mark Jindrak but Amy Weber comes in and wants to talk to him in private. She offers him her services, which Angle sees as her hedging her bets. Personal relations are implied and Angle seems rather happy.

Here’s Angle for the Kurt Angle Invitational and he’s feeling like he’s up for a gamble tonight. By that he means doing the same thing he’s done every week.

Kurt Angle vs. Brian Black

Black looks a bit like Chris Nowinski with shorter hair. Angle makes him tap in less than thirty seconds.

Torrie Wilson and Jackie Gayda meet Daniel Puder, who doesn’t seem entirely impressed. Puder brings up Jackie cheating on Charlie Haas and wishes her better luck with men in the future. They can leave now, with Puder saying they’re just after his money.

And now, a battle rap between John Cena and Kenzo Suzuki before their US Title match next week. Kenzo, now clean shaven, is dressed like Uncle Sam. It’s Kenzo going first and talking about how much he loves America with the usual lame jokes. Cena on the other hand goes with a bunch of gay jokes about him and sex jokes about Hiroko. Kenzo says something about Cena sucking so Cena brings out Rochelle, Michelle and Lauren.

They get Kenzo’s attention and he flirts with them a bit. Cena: “I swear, he’s got some game.” The women seem more disturbed than anything else so Hiroko jumps on Michelle’s back. That’s broken up and Cena cleans house. They’re just biding time until Cena goes after the World Title because everyone else feels beneath him.

Next week: the Tag Team Titles are on the line in a four way.

Rob Van Dam vs. Doug Basham

Danny Basham and Orlando Jordan are in Doug’s corner. Rob takes him to the mat without much effort as Mysterio has come out to even the score a bit. The threat of a kick to the face sends Doug outside, where he shoves Rey and gets punched down. That’s an ejection for Rey so Van Dam moonsaults down onto Doug for two back inside. They slug it out on the floor with Van Dam going back first into the apron so Doug can start in on the spine.

The bow and arrow hold doesn’t last long so Doug tries a Vader Bomb, which hits raised feet. Rob hits the middle rope boot to the face and Rolling Thunder keeps Doug in trouble. A distraction lets Orlando give Doug a foreign object but the referee catches him, allowing Danny to change places. Danny’s chokebomb is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing special to see here though it does give the Bashams a little momentum as we head into next week’s title match. The tag division isn’t exactly strong right now but Van Dam and Mysterio have felt like filler champions since they won the belts. That’s not a bad thing but I’m not sure who is going to work well as champions.

Angle lets himself into Amy’s dressing room but she’s in the shower. The suit comes off and, after Angle rubs his nipples, it’s Joy in the shower and a lot of screaming ensues. Angle pulls her towel off and smiles again as Joy runs off. Angle gets his pants on and chases after her, but finds Big Show holding her, meaning panic sets in as Angle tries to explain things. The chase is on and they wind up in the ring as the announcers try to figure out the locker room situation. Reigns and Jindrak try to help and get destroyed but Angle grabs a chair. This goes badly as well and Angle is dispatched.

Post break, here’s the same thing you just saw.

JBL, Amy and Jordan are very happy about what happened and of course Amy has put a sign up on Joy’s locker room to mess with Angle. Yeah it was telegraphed but it worked fine.

Raw Rebound.

Heidenreich punches a wall to warm up as Heyman tries to calm him down about the casket. He was totally going to volunteer to be on Heidenreich’s team if Long didn’t order him to do it.

Heidenreich/Paul Heyman vs. Undertaker

If Heidenreich/Heyman win, they can pick a different stipulation for the Rumble match. Heyman is in a suit here. Heidenreich starts for the team and shoulders Undertaker down, which is more success than you would usually expect against undertaker. An armdrag of all things takes Heidenreich down but he sends Undertaker into the corner and hammers away.

The chinlock doesn’t do anything so Heidenreich knocks him down for two more. Undertaker is right back with his usual series of strikes and the jumping clothesline puts Heidenreich back down. Snake Eyes into the big boot sends Heidenreich to the floor….and we’ve got druids.

They bring two caskets to the ring (Cole: “Perhaps one casket is for Heidenreich and the other is for Heyman!”) and Heidenreich panics. He tags Heyman and runs out into the crowd as Undertaker’s head snaps to Heyman. A lot of screaming is cut off by the Tombstone and Heyman is sent into the casket for the win. To be fair the casket is outside so I guess it would be a countout. Then again there’s no bell so I guess it’s just assumed.

Rating: D. This was exactly what it should have been as Undertaker vs. Heidenreich in a long match is nothing I ever need to see again. Since WWE seems to think they MUST finish this feud though, keeping it short is the best idea possible. Now just let Undertaker crush him at the Rumble (in another short match) and be done with it.

Overall Rating: D+. The opener carries a lot of the show and the Angle/Joy thing was fine, though the Undertaker vs. Heidenreich stuff just isn’t working. They need to get to the Royal Rumble build already so Cena can become the main event star he’s destined to be. You can feel the energy when he’s on screen and there’s no one even close to that right now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Super ShowDown 2019: They Were So Close To Not Terrible

IMG Credit: WWE

Super ShowDown 2019
Date: June 7, 2019
Location: King Abdullah Sports City Stadium, Jeddah, Saudi Arabia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

Yeah we’re back over here and no that’s not the most interesting thing in the world. It’s the third of what is likely to be twenty (geez) shows in the country that shall not be named and it feels even more like a show where they’re doing it because they have to. The Goldberg vs. Undertaker match feels like a big deal though and will likely headline the show. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Usos vs. Revival

Cole: “We are live here in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia!” Well at least they said it. Oh and it’s 94 degrees and feels 102 (34 to 39 for you Celsius fans) in the stadium. As a bonus, they have about ten minutes before the show so this is going to be short. Dawson gets backdropped to start and Wilder gets dropped over the top onto him for a bonus. The Usos hit some chops on the floor but Jimmy is taken down inside, setting up a running elbow to the back of the head.

The fans get behind the Usos, even as Jimmy gets caught in the chinlock. That’s broken up in short order and the hot tag brings in Jey for the house cleaning. The running Umaga attack in the corner rocks Dawson and a high crossbody gets two. Hang on though as Wilder distracts the referee, meaning Jey’s small package gets no count. Dawson hits a spinebuster for two but it’s time for the superkicks a go-go. Double superkicks finish Wilder at 7:11.

Rating: C-. Well it was nice while it lasted, but I guess it was more important to give the fans watching at home more hype videos for HHH vs. Randy Orton and Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon than let us have a longer match here. That isn’t sarcasm as those matches are more important, but this would have felt weak as a Raw match.

The opening video talks about what a grand international stage this is before going into a pretty standard recap of the top matches.

The pyro is back.

Raw World Title: Baron Corbin vs. Seth Rollins

Rollins is defending and is very banged up after Brock Lesnar destroyed him on Raw. Speaking of Lesnar, he has promised to cash in, though he hasn’t said on whom. The fans are behind Rollins (with his VERY taped up ribs) so Corbin gets smart with a knee to the gut. Rollins is fine enough to kick him in the head, only to have a springboard broken up with a ribs first drop onto the top rope.

Corbin drops the ropes onto the top again for two and the kickouts earn the referee a stern lecture. We hit the waistlock (I can’t handle Corbin not using a chinlock), followed by a belly to back suplex for two. Rollins manages an enziguri for the double knockdown and it’s a Sling Blade to send Corbin outside. That means back to back suicide dives, followed by a sunset flip for two back inside.

Corbin bails to the floor again but this time the suicide dive is blocked with an uppercut. The near fall off Deep Six makes the frustration even worse so Corbin grabs a chair. Common sense sets in and Corbin drops it to the floor but he yells at the referee again. This time though the referee yells back and the stunned Corbin gets rolled up to retain Rollins’ title at 11:12.

Rating: C-. This felt like a pretty lame Raw main event with the banged up Rollins not being able to do much with Corbin. They followed the blueprint pretty much to the letter but that doesn’t mean it’s something that worked. At least Corbin didn’t win here, but you can practically guarantee that we’ll be seeing this again later this month. The ending was clever though.

Post match Corbin hits the End of Days on Rollins. Cue Lesnar and Paul Heyman with the briefcase but Heyman drops the briefcase on the way in, allowing Rollins to get in a low blow and some chair shots. Lesnar tries to use the briefcase to cover up but Rollins Stomps him onto the case (that looked good) to knock Brock cold. No cash in.

Post commercials, Lesnar is still leaving the ring, earning the Goodbye Song from some of the fans.

Intercontinental Title: Andrade vs. Finn Balor

Balor is defending and of course there’s no Zelina Vega. Balor is the Demon here, with a bunch of people in black surrounding him during his entrance. Andrade starts fast and tries a quick hammerlock DDT but Balor shoves him off. A missile dropkick gives Andrade two and we hit the Three Amigos. Andrade’s reverse tornado DDT gets two more and it’s off to the chinlock. Balor fights back and sends him outside for the big flip dive and it’s 1916 for two back inside.

Back in and Andrade kicks him in the face, which just makes Balor yell a lot. Andrade’s cartwheel kick to the head puts Balor in the corner so the running knees can get two. The double moonsault hits knees (that’s still one of the most contrived moves in WWE) and Balor nails the top rope double stomp to the back for two of his own.

Andrade kicks him in the face and the hammerlock DDT gets two (Andrade: “That’s my finish!”). Balor is right back with a powerbomb and the shotgun dropkick but Andrade breaks up the Coup de Grace. They both wind up on top and Balor hits a DDT to bring Andrade right back down. Now the Coup de Grace can retain the title at 11:28.

Rating: C+. Pretty nice match here, which is about all you can ask for in a spot like this. Above all else though, WWE’s ability to screw up something like the Demon astounds me. They make it sound like it’s two completely different people and call him the Demon over and over again. As usual, it’s a case of WWE acting like the fans need everything simplified for them and it’s getting annoying.

Miz says he’ll win the battle royal.

Jinder Mahal says he’ll win the battle royal and then get the 24/7 Title back.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon. Reigns debuted on the Superstar Shakeup edition of Smackdown and punched Vince McMahon. Shane vowed revenge because you don’t attack people’s fathers (add irony to the list of things they’re bad at these days) and has sent various lackeys after Reigns. Since it’s Shane though, he’s both the final boss and the one that should be easily destroyed at the same time.

Shane McMahon vs. Roman Reigns

Drew McIntyre is here with Shane and his early distraction lets Shane get in some cheap shots in the corner. Reigns misses a charge into the post and Shane sends him in again for a bonus. Some choking has Cole freaking out over everything Shane is allowed to get away with, just like he did last month in a cage. Thankfully Graves is right there to ask how you can get away with stuff in a cage match, with Cole backpedaling in a hurry.

Shane’s back elbow to the face gets two and we hit the chinlock. Reigns fights up but the Superman Punch is countered with a chop block. The triangle goes on until Reigns turns over and powerbombs his way to freedom for two. Reigns sends Shane to the floor and goes to get him, but has to Superman Punch McIntyre first.

Back in and Shane gets two off a spear but the Coast to Coast is broken up with a Superman Punch. I won’t even bother telling you that Shane kicked out, because of course he did. The spear is blocked by a kick to the face and the referee gets bumped. McIntyre hits the Claymore and Shane gets the pin at 9:25.

Rating: D. I burst out laughing and how can you not? It’s clear that they’re just trolling us at this point and flipping off the fans who are complaining about Shane. The thing to remember here is that Shane dominated the match, kicked out of the Superman Punch and blocked the spear. Shane wasn’t dead at the end and got dragged on top for the pin. This was another case of Shane being presented as the greatest thing in WWE and the fans can just deal with it. In his last major singles matches, he’s beaten Reigns, Miz twice and Dolph Ziggler, earning a trophy and the Tag Team Titles in between. How is he not next for Kofi?

Reigns looks….mildly annoyed.

Kofi Kingston talks about all the great things he’s gotten to do as champion. Tonight, he’s giving Dolph Ziggler a new memory: the time where Kingston beats him again. Xavier Woods is here too and still seems a bit forgotten, which seems to be some seeds being planted for he and Big E. turning on Kofi.

Lars Sullivan vs. Lucha House Party

This is Sullivan’s in-ring debut and it’s a handicap match. Kalisto starts for the team and gets swatted away without too much effort. It’s off to Dorado, who has to slip out of an over the shoulder backbreaker, earning himself a clothesline to the floor. Sullivan is bleeding from the mouth as Metalik comes in and hits some kicks but Kalisto gets knocked out of the air again.

A shot to the face knocks Sullivan out to the floor though and it’s time to maul Kalisto. Graves says the fans are in awe of him but they seem to be more in awe of the lines for the restrooms. Sullivan gets knocked off the top….and Kalisto and Dorado beat on him….for a DQ at 5:44.

Rating: F. This is more amazing than Shane beating Reigns. Why in the world was this not LARS SMASH??? I’m going to hope that this is some form of punishment for Sullivan and assume that they’re not THIS stupid, though it wouldn’t shock me if that was the case. It’s another case where I have to laugh, though at least Sullivan didn’t get pinned. Would it really have shocked you if he had?

Post match the Luchas beat him up even more until Sullivan fights up and cleans house to leave them laying.

We recap HHH vs. Randy Orton. They’ve been fighting on and off for about fifteen years and now they’re doing it again because Saudi Arabia.

Randy Orton vs. HHH

HHH gets the motorcycle entrance that we were all waiting to see again. The fans go from an NXT chant to a THIS IS AWESOME chant before they even lock up. Feeling out process to start with HHH taking him into the corner but getting taken down with a headlock takeover. The fight over a top wristlock gives us another standoff as we’re firmly in HHH’s long match formula here. A missed charge sends Orton shoulder first into the post, followed by some rams into various other metal objects.

Orton drops him onto the announcers’ table and sends HHH into the steps. Back in and some stomping sets up the chinlock, with Orton pulling him by the beard to stop a comeback bid. HHH fights up again and hits the jumping knee to the face. Neither finisher can hit and HHH blocks the hanging DDT, only to eat a dropkick to put him on the apron. The superplex is blocked and HHH clotheslines him in the back of the head for a double knockdown.

Orton’s powerslam gets two and there’s the hanging DDT, but the RKO is countered into the spinebuster. HHH covers three times in a row before going to a Crossface of all things. That’s broken up with a rope break and even that takes forever with no energy to it. The Pedigree attempt is countered into a backdrop and the RKO gets two.

Orton loads up the Punt, which Cole says is how he became known as the Legend Killer (no). That’s countered into the Pedigree for two more so Orton rolls to the floor. Orton gets dropped onto the announcers’ table to even the score and HHH does it again to go one up. Make it FOUR in a row and that table still won’t break. Back in and Orton hits the RKO for the pin at 25:39 (it’s as sudden as it sounds).

Rating: D. As usual with a big HHH match, it would have been good if you cut out ten minutes of laying around and stopped watching it in slow motion. It’s not like the match means anything in the long run so Orton winning is the right move, but I need a serious shot of caffeine after this marathon.

We look back at the 24/7 Title changes at the airport and in the air.

Baron Corbin rants about the referee costing him the title. Heads will roll.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

Lashley poses on a platform during his entrance so Strowman throws it off the stage. Lashley’s shoulder has no effect as Strowman just stares at him. The test of strength goes to Lashley off some knees to the ribs, followed by a leapfrog of all things. Strowman runs him over this time but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Lashley to hit a running powerslam for two.

Lashley grabs a chinlock for a bit until Strowman powers him up and sends things outside. That means the running shoulders around the ring and the powerslam (minus the running) for two back inside. It’s back to the floor with Lashley driving him into the barricade and hitting a suplex on the ramp. Back in and Strowman slams him off the top, followed by a pair of powerslams for the win at 8:23.

Rating: D+. It was a decent hoss fight and not much more than that but were you expecting anything else? This is one of those matches that anyone can understand, even if they’re not a wrestling fan. There was a firm ceiling of what they were going to be able to do and they hit it pretty squarely.

Ali says he’s going to win the battle royal so he can inspire people.

Samoa Joe says he’s going to win the battle royal.

We recap Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler, which is the latest instance of Ziggler saying that this time will be different and he’ll be awesome and all that stuff. It’s coming off like a filler feud and that has to be the case every now and then, but Ziggler still isn’t interesting no matter how many times they trot him out there.

Smackdown World Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Kingston is defending and has Woods in his corner. Ziggler has an American flag on his tights to make sure he’s a heel around here. Kofi misses an early Stinger Splash attempt and gets dropkicked for two. Some raking of the eyes makes Kofi yell a lot and Ziggler’s yelling gets two. Kofi fights out of a chinlock and whips Ziggler hard into the corner, meaning it’s time for some tromboning. The comeback is on, including the Boom Drop for no cover.

Ziggler goes to the ropes to avoid Trouble in Paradise and heads up top, only to get tossed off. A high crossbody is rolled through to give Ziggler two and it’s off to a pinfall reversal sequence. The SOS gets two and Kofi sends him outside for the big dive (with trombone) off the top. Ziggler sends Kofi into the steps and superkicks Woods before heading back inside. Trouble in Paradise misses but woods kicks Ziggler, setting up Trouble in Paradise to retain the title at 10:09.

Rating: C. Yeah this was every Ziggler match for the last few years and that’s all you could have expected. It was fine and short with the heat likely getting to them. Kofi retaining makes sense as the idea of Ziggler being champion might be too much even for WWE these days. Assuming no cash in, Kofi vs. Shane sounds like Summerslam to me.

In the back, Ziggler rants about how Kofi is a fraud because he had his friend helping him. He wants a rematch with no one interfering, perhaps in a steel cage. WE JUST DID THAT LAST MONTH!

We look back at the opening match with Corbin yelling at the referee and getting pinned, plus the resulting failed cash-in attempt.

Video on the fans being happy that WWE is here.

Battle Royal

Zack Ryder, Curt Hawkins, The Miz, Otis, Tucker, Tony Nese, Mansoor, Mojo Rawley, Matt Hardy, Jinder Mahal, No Way Jose, Sunil Singh, Sumir Singh, Karl Anderson, Luke Gallows, Elias, Samoa Joe, Buddy Murphy, Shinsuke Nakamura, Curtis Axel, Bo Dallas, Ali, Samoa Joe, Oney Lorcan, Cedric Alexander, Humberto Carrillo, Ivar, Erik, Akira Tozawa, Ricochet, Mike Kanellis, Heath Slater, EC3, Akam, Rezar, Xavier Woods, Robert Roode, Shelton Benjamin, Rowan, Brian Kendrick, Jimmy Uso, Jey Uso, Scott Dawson, Dash Wilder, Cesaro, Titus O’Neil, Eric Young, Drew Gulak, Sin Cara, Chad Gable

I think that’s everyone. Titus gets one of the special entrances and runs down but makes sure to stop for a funny bit. Elias plays himself to the ring and sings about how many losers there are in the match. Miz jumps out of the ring and attacks Elias as EC3 and the Singh Brothers are tossed early on. Anderson is out too, along with Eric Young and Carrillo. There go Gallows and Slater as they’re clearing the ring out early on.

Axel is out, followed by Lorcan, Dallas and Tozawa. Jose, Kendrick, Gulak and Nese are tossed as you can see the mat for the first time. We settle down to a three way staredown between Heavy Machinery, AOP and the Viking Raiders for a cool visual. The Vikings get rid of the AOP and Tucker as we see Titus hiding underneath the ring. He comes back in and starts cleaning house, including eliminating the Vikings by himself. Shelton knees Titus out and Xavier superkicks Murphy to the floor.

Matt gets rid of Shelton and Joe dumps both Hawkins and Ryder. Gable and Crews are out, followed by Ricochet getting rid of Jinder. Things settle down a lot with almost everyone being down at once. Otis runs over Nakamura and Rusev, setting up the Caterpillar to little reaction. Rowan dumps Otis and Woods but gets superkicked out by the Usos. The Revival gets rid of the Usos and Hardy does the same thing to the two of them.

Cesaro eliminates Matt and Swings Alexander, setting up a catapult for the elimination. Sin Cara hits La Mistica on Cesaro but takes Kinshasa from Nakamura. Cara is right back up though and kicks Nakamura out (seriously) but Rusev dumps him as well. Miz gets rid of Roode and hits the YES Kicks on Cesaro and Elias. Cesaro ducks one though and sends Miz to the apron so Elias can knee Miz out.

We’re down to Joe, Ali, Ricochet, Mansoor, Elias and Cesaro. Ricochet and Ali start double teaming Cesaro but Joe runs them both over. The two of them get together and eliminate Joe but Cesaro eliminates both of them. Mansoor gets rid of Cesaro and we’re down to Mansoor (the home country favorite) and Elias. Mansoor hits a superkick and backdrops Elias out for the win at 17:50.

Rating: D. Yeah fine. It’s been proven that these wins mean nothing so Mansoor winning is an acceptable choice. I’ll take it over some lunkhead winning it and going nowhere as a result. Let the fans have something special to cheer for so they can actually have some energy for a change.

Post match Mansoor looks straight ahead in shock before talking about what this means to him. A year ago he was here as a prospect and now he’s won the biggest match of his career. Nice moment actually.

We run down the Stomping Grounds card, with rematches of both World Title matches confirmed.

We recap the main event in a pretty cool video package with clips of Undertaker and Goldberg from over the years. It’s a great way of showcasing how these are two monsters and that’s exactly what they’re setting up here. This has been the best built thing on the show so hopefully it’s able to come close to the hype.

Goldberg vs. Undertaker

Another spear drops Undertaker for two and it’s time for the situp. Goldberg isn’t sure what to think of that one but he’s fine enough to escape the chokeslam. The kneebar goes on until a rope is grabbed and Goldberg misses a charge into the corner, busting himself open BAD. Half of Goldberg’s head is covered in blood in a few seconds and there’s Old School. The chokeslam plants Goldberg again and it’s a Tombstone for two (and not even two and a half).

Goldberg is up first for the double clothesline and they’re both down. Snake Eyes connects but the big boot is cut off with a spear. They botch the Jackhammer with Undertaker getting dropped on his head like a brainbuster for two. Goldberg tries a Tombstone but falls down, setting up a horrible chokeslam to give Undertaker the pin at 8:28.

Rating: D-. I wanted to say it wasn’t that bad but egads some of those botches were terrible. They sucked the life out of what they had here, though the early part of the match more than felt special. That being said, it was hot, Goldberg was bloody, and it was his first match in over two years. Goldberg looked really, really off after getting cut open too and factoring in the heat, this was a lot more understandable. It was very bad at the end, but it could have been WAY worse (like if it had gone 25 minutes or some nonsense like that).

Undertaker does not look happy to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This could have been way, WAY worse and it’s miles ahead of the disaster that was Crown Jewel. There were some watchable matches earlier and, aside from the usual head scratch inducing booking choices in the middle, the last third mostly made sense. Now that being said, HHH vs. Orton is the latest edition of the cure for the common insomnia and Goldberg vs. Undertaker went sailing off a cliff after five minutes.

The problem here continues to be how unimportant these shows feel, and that’s before you even get to stuff like Sullivan winning by DQ, Shane beating Reigns, HHH’s marathon and hearing that both World Title matches are happening again in two weeks. This show is over and done with now so we can move on and forget it. It’s the middle of the three shows, but my goodness it was rough at times.

Results

Seth Rollins b. Baron Corbin – Rollup

Finn Balor b. Andrade – Coup de Grace

Shane McMahon b. Roman Reigns – Claymore from Drew McIntyre

Lars Sullivan b. Lucha House Party via DQ when Kalisto and Lince Dorado double teamed Sullivan

Randy Orton b. HHH – RKO

Braun Strowman b. Bobby Lashley – Powerslam

Kofi Kingston b. Dolph Ziggler – Trouble in Paradise

Mansoor won a battle royal last eliminating Elias

Undertaker b. Goldberg – Chokeslam

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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WCCW TV – May 16, 1987: At Least It Was Short

IMG Credit: WWE

WCCW TV
Date: May 16, 1987
Location: Texas Stadium, Irving, Texas
Attendance: 5,900
Commentator: Bill Mercer

So about a year ago, someone asked me to look at some WCCW shows. I decided to look at ten random episodes and somehow, two of the first three have been from the Parade of Champions. This is the 1987 edition, which didn’t quite have the same impact as the famous one in 1984. Mike Von Erich had recently passed away but the lack of 40,000 fans would suggest that fans weren’t quite as interested. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Steve Doll vs. Tim Brooks

Brooks is a rather scary looking man and Doll is probably best known for being in the ring when Scott Hall jumped the barricade on Nitro. Brooks jumps him at the bell (how villainous) and then lets him get back to his feet. How….nice I guess? Or stupid might make more sense. The amount of empty seats in the stadium is just embarrassing and there’s no way to hide it.

Brooks tries a sunset flip but Doll lands on him so Brooks works a waistlock in a smart move. It’s off to a test of strength as you can see several sections with literally no one in them. Doll goes to an armbar as they’re certainly in first gear so far. A headlock takeover has Brooks down again but he finally breaks it up with a knee crusher. Brooks stays on the leg by twisting the knee around and we get a rather extreme closeup.

With the knee getting a little boring, it’s off to a bearhug to change things up a bit. Doll slips out in a hurry and sends him into the corner (and nearly into the camera) but Brooks goes for the throat. An armbar puts Brooks down as the targets keep moving. Some shots to the back get Brooks out of trouble so Doll small packages him right back into it. Doll gets in a powerslam but oh yeah his knee is hurting so he collapses. A small package gives Doll the pin at 7:36.

Rating: D. This was a mixture of all over the place as well as messy, which made for a rather bad match. It’s like they could decide which body part to work on and the ending came out of nowhere. Both guys are capable of doing better than this so in theory this was just a bad night for both of them.

Al Madril vs. Mil Mascaras

Let the no selling begin. Mascaras wastes no time in taking him down for a double arm pull, which seems to hurt Madril a bit. The arm pulling continues until Madril makes the rope, allowing him to offer a handshake. Mascaras slaps the hand, which I guess is good enough. An anklescissors takes Madril down again and is keeps him on the mat in a hold you don’t see very often.

Madril’s hammerlock works as well as you would expect it to as Mascaras gets in some right hands to drop him again. There’s an abdominal stretch (and YES Mascaras hooks the toe) with Mascaras even pulling him down into a cradle for two. Madril finally gets in some shots of his own, including one to the throat to put Mascaras outside for a minute. That’s enough selling for Mascaras though as he’s right back with a flying shoulder, followed by the high crossbody for the pin at 7:04 (I have no idea how they got 10:27 for the official time).

Rating: D+. Mascaras is always an interesting one to watch as he’s a genuine legend but his reputation for not being interested in selling anything for anyone brings him down a bit. Still though, this was designed to be a Mascaras showcase and giving him a win here is hardly the worst idea in the world.

Red River Jack/Spike Huber vs. Abdullah the Butcher/Eli the Eliminator

Jack is pretty clearly Bruiser Brody under a mask. If his team loses, he has to unmask but if he and Spike win, he gets five minutes alone with Butcher/Eli’s (Eli was a territory guy who never got very big) manager Gary Hart. Huber is a smaller guy in good shape and seems to be part of a construction union. Eliminator drops Spike with a clothesline and drops a big leg to start but misses a second attempt. Jack comes in for some kicks to the head and everything breaks down early on.

Butcher chairs Jack in the back but he’s right back in to go after Butcher and Eliminator at the same time. A distraction lets Butcher’s other manager Jim Holliday post Huber as Butcher stabs Jack in the mask. That actually draws blood, which you don’t see through a mask very often. We settle down (kind of) to the villains taking turns on Jack until he kicks Eliminator in the face, setting up the hot tag to Huber. A slam and two legdrops get two on Eliminator as everything breaks down again. We lose commentary as Holliday comes in to save Huber, who reverses a Tombstone and pin Eliminator at 6:27.

Rating: C. This was a lot more sloppy than the previous two matches but also WAY more entertaining with the fans being into Jack and wanting to see Hart get what was coming to him. Huber felt pretty out of place here but he did his job well and was working hard so it’s hard to complain much about a short match like this.

Post match Hart and company unload on Jack and bust him open even further.

Red River Jack vs. Gary Hart

Hart goes after the banged up Jack but since it’s a wrestler vs. a manager and WCCW knows how to do this stuff, Jack fights back with ease and manages to take Hart’s shirt off. They fight to the floor and brawl up the aisle with Jack getting in a chair shot before heading back inside to win via countout (though there was no bell) at about 1:50.

We see some clips of Bruiser Brody defeating Jeep Swenson from last week (or later in the Parade of Champions).

WCWA World Title: Kevin Von Erich vs. Nord The Barbarian

Kevin is defending and Nord is better known as the Berzerker. Oh and David is wearing his brother Mike’s ring jacket with yellow roses for David in case you REALLY don’t know what to expect here. Nord goes straight at him and hits a flying shoulder to put the champ in early trouble.

A sleeper is broken up so it’s a powerslam for two on Kevin instead. Nord goes up top but misses a guillotine legdrop, allowing Kevin to hit his own slow motion powerslam. There’s a missile dropkick but Kevin’s splash hits a raised boot. A legdrop over the back sets up an over the shoulder backbreaker but Kevin gets smart and grabs the Claw. That’s enough to make them fall over the top and it’s a double countout at 5:33.

Rating: D+. What they had here wasn’t too bad but what in the world was that ending? They really couldn’t do anything other than a double countout in the main event of one of their biggest shows of the year for the World Title? After the previous match they aired had a countout as well? I don’t get the booking here, but then again this isn’t exactly the height of their creative powers.

Overall Rating: D. Egads this wasn’t much to see and it’s easy to see why the promotion is starting to fall apart. What was the appeal here? A tag match about unmasking someone who would be working later on in the show? This was a rather boring show and the best thing about it was the fact that I only had to watch part of the event. Rather bad night here and the empty seats told you almost everything you needed to know.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


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Super ShowDown Preview

Yeah we have to go back to Saudi Arabia because WWE needs money to keep paying for all these people that they never actually use on TV. The card feels a little tied together and that’s not the best thing in the world. Some of the matches could be entertaining but the previous two shows have been horrendous at best and a disaster at worst. Maybe they can break the trend here but I’m not exactly optimistic. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Revival vs. Usos

You know, because this has no place on the main card. This story had cooled off a bit but suddenly the Revival are Shane McMahon’s lackeys, because that’s….actually I shouldn’t be complaining about that because it’s a major upgrade over the stuff they had been doing with the Usos. They also beat the Usos a few weeks back on Monday Night Raw, but I doubt WWE remembers or cares about something like that.

I’ll take the Usos to win here, likely setting up a rubber match at Stomping Grounds. These guys can put on a clinic if they’re given the time and I’ll certainly take this over some of the other stuff we’re likely to get. I could go for either of them winning, but it makes more sense for the Usos to go over here. That’s fine, as long as we stay from the utter nonsense that they did a few weeks back.

Lars Sullivan vs. Lucha House Party

On paper, this should be the easiest pick of the year but there is one problem. Would you put it past WWE to punish Sullivan by having him lose to three luchadors? I mean, it would be the dumbest thing they could do and it wouldn’t shock me to see it happen. Sullivan is one of the best prospects for a monster they’ve had in a little while and that’s not the kind of thing they need to waste in a match like this.

I’ll hope that sanity prevails here and that we get the Sullivan win that makes all the sense in the world. Sullivan should crush these three with no problem whatsoever but that isn’t always the way WWE likes to play these things. Hopefully Sullivan goes over and gets to move on to something more substantial (like picking a fight with Aleister Black) but for now, I’m just hoping WWE doesn’t get any “brilliant” ideas.

Intercontinental Title: Finn Balor(c) vs. Andrade

Yeah this is a thing in case you had forgotten about it. Andrade beat Balor back around the time of the Superstar Shakeup but thanks to Money in the Bank, we’re just now getting to the big title match. Neither has done anything significant in months so let’s have a title match. I’m not thrilled with this one but it’s a match with some potential.

I’ll take Andrade to win here, as Balor is the kind of guy who can be moved around the card without losing much steam. It’s not a good idea to have either of them lose and the title is the kiss of death at the moment, but it wouldn’t shock me to see a title change. That being said, these shows have a tendency to not do a lot of title changes in the first place, so maybe I’m overthinking things here. It’s not like either of them are going to benefit from having the title either, but I’ll go with Andrade for the sake of some history.

Bobby Lashley vs. Braun Strowman

This sounds good on paper but I’m not sure what kind of chemistry they’ll have together. It’s a power match and Strowman will be able to throw Lashley around like no one ever has, though I’m not sure how dominant Lashley is going to be able to look in return. At least there’s a simple idea here and it’s an actual wrestling match instead of the arm wrestling mess we had on Monday.

There’s no reason to have Lashley win here so I’ll take Strowman to go over and continue his dominance in the country. Given how behind the times Saudi Arabia tends to be, it makes sense to have Strowman get some momentum there since he’s a few months (if not years) removed from being an interesting character and anyone worth pushing.

Triple H vs. Randy Orton

Yeah this is a thing that’s being done because the shows need to have something “special”. In this case it’s a feud that was completely played out ten years ago and that no one has thought of since then. I’m not thrilled with seeing this and based on their segment on Monday, neither are Triple H and Orton.

I’ll go with Triple H to win here in what I’d assume is a feel good moment, though seeing the RKO finish him off wouldn’t be the biggest shock. The problem here is there is no reason to care about either guy winning the match because Triple H isn’t a wrestler anymore and Orton has absolutely nothing going on at the moment. It’s a match that doesn’t matter to either guy so I’ll take Triple H to give himself a win.

Roman Reigns vs. Shane McMahon

How are we here? I don’t even mean how are we having this match, but more importantly how are we in a place where McMahon winning is not out of the question? I know it isn’t likely to happen, but would McMahon pulling this off really shock you? Reigns winning is what makes the most sense here and yet I can’t get the slightest bit of confidence rolling for the idea.

For the sake of my own sanity, I’ll pick Reigns to win here but you know the feud isn’t going to end anytime soon. For some reason WWE has turned McMahon into the greatest thing since Sliced Bread #1 and it started last November in Saudi Arabia. Hopefully it ends here as well, but do you really think we’re getting away that easily? Reigns wins, and I say that with roughly 51% confidence.

Raw World Title: Seth Rollins(c) vs. Baron Corbin

And I thought my nightmares were over with the last match. This is another match that only WWE seems to think is interesting and odds are it’s going to get at least twenty minutes because Corbin needs twenty minutes. Rollins is coming in banged up thanks to Brock Lesnar, who is going to be lurking around with the Money In The Bank briefcase. Lesnar promised to cash in the briefcase here too so you know what that means.

I’ll take Rollins to overcome the odds and retain, likely setting up a rematch at Stomping Grounds with Corbin because WWE doesn’t know how rematches work these days either. Then again the fact that Corbin is already in the match should tell you everything you need to know about their intelligence in the first place. Rollins could use another big win and if you add up the three he’ll probably have to get over Corbin, he’s at least up to a medium.

SmackDown World Title: Kofi Kingston(c) vs. Dolph Ziggler

I’m getting such a headache with a ll these names that are in such big matches. Of all the people that WWE has available for this show, they decide to bring Ziggler out of mothballs for his latest “I’m totally different this time and I’ll win the big one for real!” story? You have the whole Wild Card thing at your disposal and you couldn’t find ANYONE better for this? Like, Andrade or Drew McIntyre or Rusev or Shinsuke Nakamura or the paper plate that Bo Dallas used at catering?

Not that it matters though as I fully expect Lesnar to cash in the briefcase here and become SmackDown World Champion. WWE is going to try as much as they can to boost the SmackDown Live ratings and since the problem can’t be everything else going on with that show, the blame must call directly on Kingston and Kingston alone. That being said, the title reign has already been longer than I would have bet on, but does it have to be Lesnar that takes it? I mean, odds are Reigns takes it back on the first FOX show, but egads I hope they can come up with something more original.

Fifty Man Battle Royal

Who is even in this thing? I know they’ve announced a few names but the biggest name is Miz, and that’s not exactly the top level star that you would pick as a winner. Battle royals can be all over the place as you never know what you might get in something like this. It might be a match where they get rid of everyone in a hurry, but at the same time there is a possibility that this is going to be crazy long with a bunch of waiting around until we get to the big names.

Since I don’t know who is in the thing, I’ll take…..let’s go with Big Show to win. I mean, it’s not like the match means anything at all anyway (as proven by the Greatest Royal Rumble) so go with someone who hasn’t meant anything in WWE in a long time. Hopefully this isn’t some 45 minute epic struggle because that’s about as far from what this show is going to need as you can get. Or it could be McMahon, because why not.

Goldberg vs. Undertaker

Yeah they’re old, yeah this would have been better twenty years ago and yeah it’s going to need to be about five minutes long, but sweet goodness that showdown they had at the end of SmackDown Live was great. This feels epic because it’s an actual dream match that could be really entertaining. What might not be so entertaining is seeing Undertaker’s bones come flying out of his body when Goldberg hits a spear. Then again with the money they’re getting for these things, I’m sure they can afford the medical bills.

I guess I’ll go with Undertaker here, but I can’t imagine either of them actually losing. Undertaker is far more likely to wrestle for the company again though and it would make more sense to have him get the win. Also can you imagine WWE letting a WCW wrestler get that big of a win over someone as important as Undertaker? The match is going to feel a lot better than it is, but I’ll take what little good I can get.

Overall Thoughts

I don’t want to watch this show and I don’t know many people who do. These shows are long, usually terrible and I just feel wrong for watching them. There is a good chance that it’s one of the worst shows of the year and very little on the show gets my attention. Hopefully they exceed my nonexistent expectations, but it’s not like they have any kind of a positive track record.

Oh and I don’t think they’ll have the teased women’s match. I’ll be stunned if they do and there’s a tiny chance they could, I just can’t picture them actually letting it happen.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Ring of Honor TV – June 5, 2019: Old Guys Are Still Good

Ring of Honor
Date: June 5, 2019
Location: The Odeum, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Ian Riccaboni, Colt Cabana

Things have been going fairly well for the company as of late and that’s rather nice for a change. The problem is I’m not sure how long that can last, as there are a lot of problems that need to be fixed around here. Hopefully things stay as good as they have been in recent weeks, though this company doesn’t have the best track record. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Allure to talk about how they’ve brought credibility to the Women of Honor. They started a revolution a long time ago and it’s time to believe in then. We hear their resumes and they know how to make an impact. That’s why they debuted at the biggest show of the year in Madison Square Garden. And for all the Twitter trolls hiding in their mom’s basement, Mandy Leon is the foundation of the Women of Honor division.

Cue Jenny Rose and Kelly Klein for the brawl with Velvet Sky bailing to the floor. A hairspray blast blinds Jenny and the Allure gets out. Klein wants to know what the three of them have done lately and the challenge is laid out for anytime and anywhere. This still feels so out of place around here.

Bouncers vs. Kingdom vs. Coast to Coast vs. Young Lions

One fall to a finish. LSG shoves Milonas in the face for some reason and is shoved down with ease. Marseglia comes in instead but the chops don’t do much on the big man. The huge crossbody drops Marseglia so it’s off to Bruiser for some snap jabs. Marseglia gets smart and kicks at the knee before going after Bruiser’s teeth….which don’t exist.

Alex Coughlin takes himself in and gets Clark Conners to help with a double hiptoss on O’Ryan. The Lions start cleaning house and it’s a Cannonball from Bruiser to take out Coast to Coast. Back from a break with Conners taking a double flapjack from the Kingdom and a legdrop/backsplash combination getting two. We settle back down to Ali hitting a slingshot hilo for two on Conners, followed by a double slam for two more.

Conners finally slips out of a suplex attempt and the hot tag brings in Coughlin to clean house. A missed charge in the corner allows Bruiser to tag himself in though and everything breaks down again. Marseglia comes back in to start kicking people in the face but gets sent into a sitout Boss Man Slam.

Coast to Coast hits a Stroke/Downward Spiral combination on Bruiser but the Lions and Kingdom are back in. House of 1000 Horses drops Conners though and Ali gets two, with Bruiser shoving LSG onto the cover for the break. Coughlin tries to clean house but gets crushed in the corner, setting up Closing Time to give Milonas the pin at 10:23.

Rating: C. The Bouncers continue to grow on me as they’re fitting in well for the fun team spot, which isn’t the worst place in the world to be. The Young Lions losing doesn’t hurt them so this was hardly a devastating loss. If nothing else it’s nice to not see the Kingdom win again so this was a nice surprise.

Mark Haskins and Tracy Williams are ready for Bully Ray, even though Lifeblood’s numbers are down. PJ Black comes in to offer his services but they walk away.

We look at Colt Cabana winning the NWA National Title and being challenged by James Storm after the match. The title match is next week in Chicago.

We look back at last week’s show with Silas Young’s exhibition and Kenny King defeating Jay Lethal using Lethal’s own Lethal Injection.

We get a video on Jeff Cobb, who is challenging for the World Title at Best In The World. He was born in Baltimore but moved to Guam, where he managed to make the US Olympic team. He didn’t fare well and now he wants to be the best in the world in Ring of Honor.

Josh Woods vs. Maverick Boone

Woods powerbombs him down and hits the Seismic Toss for the pin at 54 seconds.

Yuji Nagata/Satoshi Kojima vs. Evil/Sanada

The crowd wastes no time in the ALL THESE GUYS chants as Nagata forearms Sanada to start. They go to the mat and it’s an early standoff. They shake hands and Sanada kicks him in the ribs, which you don’t do to an old wrestler. Nagata kicks at the leg and brings in Kojima for some kicks of his own. We pause for some chest bouncing between Sanada and Kojima until Evil trips Kojima to take over.

Sanada ties Kojima up in the Paradise Lock for the running dropkick. Back from a quick break with Kojima kicking and DDTing his way out of trouble. That’s enough for the diving tag off to Nagata so house the hard kicks can continue. The exploder suplex gives Nagata two and it’s time to forearm it out. Nagata’s big kick is countered but he blocks another Paradise Lock attempt. Instead it’s the Nagata Lock but Evil finally comes in for the break. The freed Sanada hits a springboard dropkick to Nagata and hands it off to Evil, who gets dropkicked in the knee.

That’s enough for the tag to Kojima for the rapid fire chops to both of them in the corner. A top rope elbow gets two on Evil but the discus lariat is countered with a rake to the eyes. Evil gets two off a clothesline but Nagata breaks up the Magic Killer. The Koji Cutter gets two on Evil, followed by the brainbuster for the same. Evil and Kojima trade standing switches until Sanada comes back in for a dropkick, setting up the Magic Killer for the pin at 12:16.

Rating: C+. I’ve never been a fan of Nagata’s but this was a fun match with the old guys looking good and Evil/Sanada getting a bit of a statement win over the legends. It was a smart move for a TV main event as these fans are going to cheer this kind of stuff every single time. Sometimes it’s ok to not have a storyline main event and that’s what they did here.

Here’s Dalton Castle to talk about what has been going on with him. He has come to terms with the fact that he lost at Supercard of Honor. It was a spectacular loss though because Rush beat him in sixteen seconds. It’s ok though because Rush is a dirty, filthy cheater. That’s why Castle wants a match with Rush…..’s brother Dragon Lee. Rush is going to pay with his family’s health as Castle breaks every bone in Lee’s body.

Cue the Boys, now in regular gear, to beat Castle down and knock him to the floor. Castle fights back though and sends them into the barricade and various other hard objects. Boy #1 is put on a table and Castle powerbombs #2 onto him but not through the table. Castle yells a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The streak of good shows stumbled here but it’s not quite done yet. This was a show where they threw in some of the less important stuff and I have a feeling that’s going to be the case next week as well. There was nothing bad here though and that’s certainly better than some of the things that happen around here on some occasions. The Castle segment worked well and hopefully they can keep building up the midcard like this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Fury Road: It’s The Next Road Over

IMG Credit: Major League Wrestling

Fury Road
Date: June 1, 2019
Location: Waukesha County Expo Center, Waukesha, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Cornette, Rich Bocchini

We’re FINALLY done with the Wrestlemania weekend tapings and tonight it’s a live special with the finals of the National Openweight Title tournament to crown an inaugural champion. Throw in a Middleweight Title match and we have a nice little show here. Hopefully it can turn into a good big show, but I’m not getting my hopes up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s show with Contra dominating a lot of the roster.

Opening sequence.

World Champion Tom Lawlor is not here yet, either due to weather or traffic issues.

Myron Reed vs. Gringo Loco

Reed has his mouth taped and is holding up the JUSTICE sign again. Rich rants about Reed being checked for weapons despite never having one….and then the referee doesn’t check him anyway, making it a moot point. Loco goes outside early on and it’s a big flip dive to take him down. Back in and Loco starts the flips before dropkicking Reed’s legs out for a nice looking counter.

Reed’s hurricanrana is countered with a cartwheel and Reed is rather stunned. A jumping enziguri hits Reed’s raised arm but puts him down on the apron anyway, only to have him knock Loco down with a forearm. The slingshot legdrop gets two on Loco and it’s time for Reed to get cocky. We hit the chinlock to slow things down but Loco is right back up. Then he’s right back down after missing a moonsault, leaving Reed to charge….right into a running Liger Bomb for two.

A super Falcon Arrow (or a “super Falcon Arrow slam thing” according to Cornette) gets two more but since Reed somehow survived that, it’s a springboard cutter for two on Loco. The springboard 450 is good for the same but the referee accuses Reed of pulling out a foreign object. Since there’s nothing there, Reed has to hit a Stundog Millionaire to block a suplex. Another accusation from the referee has Reed annoyed so Loco grabs a spinning Tombstone for the pin at 8:35.

Rating: C+. Reed is an uninteresting character in an interesting story if that makes sense. It might be something that has been done before but it’s a story that can work well. Loco is becoming a cult favorite but he’s a cult favorite who can have some entertaining matches. This worked well and kept the story going so well done.

Post match Reed pulls out some brass knuckles to knock Loco silly.

Salina de la Renta will be executive producing another episode of Fusion on June 15.

We take a quick look at the Crusher, the Man Who Made Milwaukee Famous. Next week, he gets a statue in Milwaukee.

Tom Lawlor still isn’t here so he can’t be interviewed.

National Openweight Title: Brian Pillman Jr. vs. Alexander Hammerstone

For the inaugural title. Pillman’s hair is now bleached blond, which doesn’t work that well for him. Before the match, Maxwell Jacob Friedman says Brian Pillman Sr. would be sick at the sound of his own son. With the seconds gone, Pillman dodges early on and ducks a right hand, setting up a few chops. Forearms in the corner have Hammerstone in trouble and a running dropkick makes it worse. Hammerstone responds by kicking him in the face as the fans try to get behind Pillman again.

Pillman avoids a suplex though and dropkicks him out to the floor for a mostly missed dive. A running start around the ring gets Pillman swung into the barricade and a powerbomb onto the apron stays on Pillman’s back. Hammerstone runs him over back inside and there’s a hard whip into the corner. A little trash talking lets Pillman hits a superkick for two, followed by a spinning high crossbody for the same. The Swanton misses though and the Nightmare Pendulum makes Hammerstone the champion at 8:07.

Rating: C+. They did what they could do here as Pillman isn’t ready for the big epic match. The ending was the right call though as Hammerstone winning gives the Dynasty vs. Hart Foundation feud a little more life. That and Hammerstone is a monster and they would be nuts to have him lose so early. Just give us Smith Jr. vs. Hammerstone and I’ll be happy.

Post match Hammerstone says he was putting in the work while Pillman was riding his dad’s coattails. Now this title is Dynasty.

Austin Aries is still coming. Maybe in his hometown of Milwaukee?

The announcers are cut off by a video with the Contra feed. Contra seems to have taken over the production truck and we see a video of the team attacking Tom Lawlor.

Lawlor is bound and gagged but they take the tape off and choke him with it instead. They want him to learn that they can take anything at any time, including Lawlor’s hair, which is quickly cut.

The announcers apologize for making us see that, including the levels of violence shown. That’s not even the most violent thing Contra has done.

We recap the main event with Jimmy Havoc wanting to end Teddy Hart’s career resurgence.

Middleweight Title: Teddy Hart vs. Jimmy Havoc

Hart is defending and both guys bring chairs, though this isn’t billed as No DQ. We get some Big Match Intros to stretch things out a little bit longer. Hart wastes no time in moonsaulting for no reason other than to show off a bit, which draws a charging Havoc into the corner. Some chair shots to the ribs are perfectly fine with Cornette saying we have relaxed rules due to Hart being involved.

Hart forearms him down for two and it’s time to work on the arm as the announcers talk about all the weather and technical issues that have taken place today. We take a break and come back with Hart hitting a Backstabber, followed by a powerbomb Backstabber. The moonsault gets two more as we hear about Tom Lawlor staggering up to the ticket window and asking for help, though we won’t be seeing it. They head to the apron with Havoc trying an RKO onto a chair, with Hart’s face not getting anywhere near the thing.

Somehow Hart is busted anyway and Havoc goes with the paper cuts between the fingers and on the mouth. A suplex onto a piece of barricade makes it even worse for Hart and it’s time to head back inside. The chair is set up in the corner but, of course, Hart manages to reverse a whip to send Havoc into it instead.

Havoc reverses a super hurricanrana and gets the Sharpshooter (IT’S BECAUSE TEDDY IS RELATED TO BRET HART AND THIS HAS TO BE INCLUDED IN EVERY HART MATCH IN THE HISTORY OF EVER!!!), sending Hart over to the rope. As Cornette tries to figure out why that works in a match with weapons, Havoc hits a Canadian Destroyer but misses the Acid Rainmaker. Hart grabs a Canadian Destroyer of his own and it’s the lifting hammerlock DDT onto the chair to retain the title at 11:33.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one as the weapons didn’t add anything and they really didn’t add anything to the match. Hart isn’t exactly a hardcore guy and it was just Havoc doing the short form version of his greatest hits. It’s not terrible and Hart’s weird charisma makes things work, but I could have gone for something rather different.

Post match the Dynasty comes in to beat down Hart, drawing out the Hart Foundation for the big brawl to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. For a live special, this worked quite well and would make me want to see what happens next. That’s exactly the point of something like this and I liked what I was seeing for the most part. There was no blow away match but I don’t think there really needed to be. What we got was good, though I’m more interested in where this is going than where it is here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Reviewing The Review – Double Or Nothing

Now that some time has passed, it’s a little easier to look at what went down.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-reviewing-review-double-nothing/




NXT – June 5, 2019: We Need More Biff Fans

IMG Credit: WWE

NXT
Date: June 5, 2019
Location: Webster Bank Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Beth Phoenix, Nigel McGuinness, Mauro Ranallo

It’s a special show this week as we get the mostly recap show from Takeover. That’s fine as they haven’t had time to do a new set of tapings yet, but we’ll also have the two matches taped before the show. It might not make for the best show in the world, but it’s a fine enough way to go about doing things until we can get to what really matters. Let’s get to it.

Here are Saturday’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Takeover, which was a completely average Takeover and one of the best shows of the year.

Opening sequence.

Keith Lee vs. Kona Reeves

Reeves goes for the arm to start and Lee isn’t all that impressed. A bigger wristlock sends Reeves bailing to the apron so Lee picks him up by one hand and brings him back in. Lee lifts him over his head and Reeves tweaks his knee on the way back down. The goldbricking lets Reeves get in a headbutt and a running boot in the corner. That’s enough to knock Lee onto the apron and it’s a chinlock because Reeves isn’t that bright.

Lee powers out of it so Reeves forearms him in the back of the head to cut off the comeback. Some right hands just wake Lee up though and it’s time for the left hands to put Reeves in trouble. Reeves gets in a quick Rock Bottom (not a bad one either) for two but Lee is right back with a series of strikes to the face. The big Pounce sets up the Limit Breaker for the pin at 6:10.

Rating: D+. I don’t think NXT knows what to do with Lee at this point as he’s incredibly talented but hasn’t had a major feud other than the rather good matches with Dijakovic. He could go for something more substantial, but watching him hurt Reeves was rather entertaining. At least NXT has given up on Reeves, which should have been the case a long time ago.

We look at Shayna Baszler successfully defending the Women’s Title against Io Shirai, who snapped after the match in what should have been a heel turn.

Shirai says she isn’t done with Baszler.

We look back at the four way ladder match with the Street Profits winning the vacant Tag Team Titles in a pretty cool moment.

The Street Profits dedicated their win to hard work and dedication. They even thank the cameraman, who has been here since day one.

We look back at Tyler Breeze vs. Velveteen Dream with Dream retaining the North American Title. They even took a selfie together.

Breeze says the match could have gone either way and he respects Dream. Hopefully Dream respects him too but what matters is that Breeze is back in NXT for good.

Damien Priest is coming.

Mia Yim vs. Bianca Belair

It’s the rubber match no one was asking for. Belair takes her down to start with ease so Mia does the same thing to her. Mia misses an armdrag and Bianca stands on her hand while doing that abysmal catchphrase. A running faceplant drops Mia again and it’s time for the abdominal stretch to slow Yim down.

There’s a tilt-a-whirl gutbuster for two and it’s a bow and arrow to stay on the ribs. Belair drops down onto Mia’s back and even messes with the hair. Another drop lands on Mia’s raised knees but Bianca is right back with another running faceplant. The back is bent around the post but Mia pulls Belair shoulder post into the post to even things up.

A sloppy looking roll sends Belair into the steps, followed by Code Blue for two back inside. Belair is back up and ties her hair around her head so Mia can’t pull it, only to have Mia get in the guillotine choke. That’s broken up so Belair takes her into the corner, only to get caught with the Protect Ya Neck off the middle rope for the pin at 10:39.

Rating: C. I’m almost relieved that they seem to have cooled off on Belair, who still doesn’t click at just about anything. Mia is better and has grown on me a bit, though she doesn’t scream star. The trilogy didn’t exactly get my attention but for a match like this, on this kind of a show, it’s fine for a main event.

Drew Gulak doesn’t like that Marty McFly wannabe (Gulak: “Everybody knows Biff is the hero of the movie!”) showing off around here. Now he wants a submission match with Kushida. The match is set for next week.

Also next week: Undisputed Era vs. Oney Lorcan/Danny Burch.

A long video on Adam Cole taking the NXT Title from Johnny Gargano ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I never know what to say about these shows as they’re only meant to be a placeholder/a recap for the maybe four people who watch NXT but not Takeover. We’ll get to what matters next week after the big show, that’s not the worst thing in the world. Now we can get back to normal and start the slow build towards Toronto, which should make for some good TV.

Results

Keith Lee b. Kona Reeves – Limit Breaker

Mia Yim b. Bianca Belair – Protect Ya Neck

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




NXT UK – June 5, 2019: Four The Hard Way

IMG Credit: WWE

NXT UK
Date: June 5, 2019
Location: Braehead Arena, Glasgow, Scotland
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

We’re still in Glasgow and it’s another big night with the fatal four way to crown a new #1 contender. That’s quite the interesting match and most of the people involved are conceivable winners. Other than that we now have Imperium looming over the rest of the roster and that could get interesting in a hurry. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the four way and how all four (Joe Coffey, Jordan Devlin, Dave Mastiff and Travis Banks) qualified.

Opening sequence.

The Hunt vs. Tyson T-Bone/Saxon Huxley

I had hoped T-Bone and Huxley had fallen in a hole somewhere. Huxley can’t do much with Wild Boar, who growls at him and fires off some forearms. A Thesz press gives Huxley a breather and it’s off to T-Bone vs. Wild Boar in a match that sounds like it’s out of a wrestling video game made by people who don’t watch wrestling. Vic: “T-Bone and Huxley have become quite the team over the last few months.” I don’t remember the last time they were on TV. Boar gets over for the tag though and it’s Primate coming in for some screaming. A Cannonball to Huxley brings Boar back in for a powerbomb/German suplex combination, followed by a double Swan Dive for the pin on Huxley at 3:41.

Rating: D+. The Hunt is a team that could be a solid midcard addition so I’m more than cool with having them beat a team like T-Bone and Huxley. They kept this quick because a team like the Hunt isn’t going to be the most intriguing in a longer match, so everything worked out fine here.

Post match Wolfgang and Mark Coffey come out and jump the Hunt. Wolfgang goes over to commentary to yell at Nigel as the Hunt is left laying.

Kay Lee Ray vs. Kasey Owens

In a bit of an odd thing to hear, Ray is billed as the ICW Women’s Champion. The fans chant ICW as Ray forearms away to start but charges into a boot in the corner. Owens’ over the ropes armbar is blocked with a kick to the back and a dropkick makes it even worse. Owens gets in some strikes of her own but misses a running kick and gets slapped in the chest. A Gory Bomb finishes Owens at 3:57.

Rating: C-. Ray is another name who could become a force in the division and be a rather strong challenger against Toni Storm down the line. There are a lot of names who could become top level performers in the division and Ray already has the success outside of the division. Just keep going like this and see where she can go.

Video on Imperium, who wants to destroy British Strong Style.

Video on Jazzy Gabbert destroying Xia Brookside last week.

Jinny says she got Jazzy to help her because she paid her off. She could either fight Jazzy or befriend her because Jinny is more than just a pretty face.

Here are the Grizzled Young Veterans with something to say. Zack Gibson was told not to come out here but he has something to say. They are the first NXT UK Tag Team Champions and now they’re having to defend the titles at the Download Festival. Gibson: “IS THIS A RIB???” Johnny Saint wants Gibson to walk through an ugly field in his custom boots to defend these titles while horrible bands like Slipknot ruin music? They are the NXT UK Tag Team Champions so they need some respect. If they’re unhappy, the rest of the locker room will be unhappy. That’s bad for morale, so old man Saint needs to figure it out.

Moustache Mountain are in Men’s Health UK.

Next week, British Strong Style vs. Imperium.

Jordan Devlin vs. Dave Mastiff vs. Travis Banks vs. Joe Coffey

One fall to a finish. Coffey shouts that this is his kingdom and it’s Banks vs. Devlin fighting on the floor early on. Coffey and Mastiff hit shoulders that send them outside. That works so well that they do it again a few times on the floor. Banks goes after Mastiff and gets thrown into the barricade, allowing Mastiff and Coffey to collide again. Devlin gets thrown down too and everyone is on the floor.

It’s Banks hammering away at Devlin back inside but managing to kick at Coffey as well. Running elbows in the corner have the villains in trouble and Devlin is thrown head first into Coffey’s crotch. Mastiff comes back in to start throwing people around but Coffey blocks the rolling German suplexes. Devlin takes them instead but Coffey manages to powerslam Mastiff. Just to show off, Coffey throws Banks on his shoulders and reverse giant swings Devlin at the same time.

There’s a double underhook swing to Devlin but he sends Coffey shoulder first into the post. Some stomping keeps Coffey down and Devlin even manages to take out the invading Banks. A backbreaker keeps Banks down but Devlin makes the mistake of mocking Coffey’s pose. Now guess who pops up right behind him. Actually it would be Coffey and Mastiff, who knock him around with some forearms. Coffey’s running headbutt to the ribs hits the buckle though and Mastiff’s German suplex gets two on Banks.

Devlin comes back in and gets knocked into the corner as well for a Cannonball from Mastiff. That’s broken up at two so Banks hits the running Spanish Fly for two on Devlin. Coffey’s top rope spinning crossbody crushes Mastiff and it’s All The Best For The Bells for two more on Devlin. The big guys get knocked to the floor though and it’s the Slice of Heaven into the Kiwi Crusher to give Banks the pin at Devlin at 12:15.

Rating: B. I like Banks getting the title shot like this as he can certainly go in the ring and would give Walter a heck of a run for his money. That being said, he’s going to need some allies to deal with Imperium. They’re keeping Mastiff strong as well and seeing Walter powerbomb him at the end of a hoss fight could be a lot of fun.

Overall Rating: B-. Nice show here, which again is a good sign without the top stars around. They’re doing a nice job of making the smaller names look important and that’s how you build up a successful promotion over time. Banks is someone who could be a very fun challenger to Walter and they kept the others looking strong enough. It’s like they’re thinking, which is a welcome idea around this company.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – January 3, 2005: Happy New Year Of Big Dave

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 3, 2005
Location: Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the first show of a new year and also the go home show for New Year’s Revolution. That doesn’t leave us very long to finalize everything but since so much of the card is tied up in the Elimination Chamber, you can probably guess where things are going this week. Other than that, we probably need some more matches to be added to the card at the last minute. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s Beat The Clock Challenge which saw Batista earn the right to enter the Chamber last. Oh and Shawn Michaels is going to be guest referee.

Eric Bischoff is in the back with the World Title and makes tonight very simple: three singles matches between the six Chamber participants. Nothing wrong with that, mainly because it’s once.

Batista vs. Chris Benoit

Batista goes with the power to start so Benoit gets in a dragon screw legwhip to take him down. A backbreaker cuts Benoit off but Batista goes for a turnbuckle pad, allowing Benoit to roll some German suplexes. Batista catches him on top and hits a Muscle buster of all things for a delayed two. The half crab with a knee on Benoit’s head has him in more trouble and Batista even picks up Benoit’s hand to make him tap.

The spinebuster gives Batista two more but Benoit scores with an enziguri, followed by the hard German suplex. Benoit hits the Swan Dive (or at least seems to after a quick camera cut) for two more and the Crossface goes on, though Benoit is almost on top of Batista’s back instead of off to the side. Batista powers up without much effort and drives Benoit head first (several times) into the exposed buckle. Now it’s time to get fired up and the Batista Bomb finishes.

Rating: C+. It’s so frustrating watching WWE stumble through the dark as they try to get monsters (or anyone) over these days when it’s this easy. Batista has been protected for months, says things that makes him look smart and then wins big matches. If they have the talent and intelligence to do the rest, which Batista did because he was well trained down in OVW, you’ll have a star on your hands.

Ric Flair is very pleased with what happened when Batista comes in. Flair says all they have to do is have HHH survive until the end when Batista can destroy everyone so HHH can get the title back. Batista says HHH can count on him, but he wants the $100 from last week’s bet. Flair looks terrified at what this could mean and HHH tells him to give Batista $100.

That’s fine with Flair, who wants to keep the peace. Batista wants HHH’s money though so HHH pulls out $100. Batista laughs and tells HHH to get a sense of humor. Again: treat him like someone with a brain to go with his physical dominance and there is no way he won’t be awesome.

We look back at Snitsky Pillmanizing Kane’s neck.

Snitsky is surprised that Kane is coming back and whispers something to Maria, who runs off. He has a surprise for Kane on Sunday.

Edge still doesn’t get why Shawn Michaels is guest referee on Sunday because it won’t be fair. Bischoff says this is because Edge hurt Shawn even worse and cost Raw revenue. He’s trying to make up for some of it on Sunday, but for now Edge needs to worry about his match.

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

They trade waistlocks to start with Jericho taking him to the mat by the leg. Back up and Edge punches him in the face but gets backdropped to the floor. Jericho follows him out and it’s a double clothesline to take us to a break. We come back with Edge working on the arm for a change, including a DDT on the arm for two. It’s off to a different armbar because Edge is good enough to mix up the holds he uses instead of doing the same things over and over.

Jericho fights up and hits a shoulder with the bad arm, which doesn’t seem to do much damage. A hurricanrana sends Edge flying but he’s right back with a heck of a big boot for two. Jericho’s northern lights suplex gets the same so he kicks Edge hard in the ribs. Edge catches him on top and tries a superplex, which is tossed down for a crash. A missed high crossbody misses Edge but he can’t get the spear. Jericho tries a rollup but Edge sits down on it and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: C. It wasn’t quite as good as the opener but Edge cheating to win gave him a victory that he needed. Edge is one of the weaker options in the Chamber so having him cheat to win is a good way for him to catch up. It’s not like Jericho losing is going to do any serious damage to him anyway.

Randy Orton is ready for his long awaited one on one match with HHH before he wins the World Title on Sunday.

JR and King thank the British fans for watching the show live but King cuts him off to say Happy Birthday.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Sylvan Grenier

Non-title with Maven coming out to do commentary. The distraction lets Grenier get in a cheap shot before the bell as Maven starts to gloat. Grenier stomps away in the corner as Maven talks about how he wants the Intercontinental Title match on Sunday. The chinlock goes on, followed by a full nelson to mix the holds up a bit.

Shelton fights up and drives him into the corner for the break and the comeback is on. Rob Conway offers a distraction, allowing Shelton to hit the Dragon Whip. The referee just stops counting at two because Grenier doesn’t kick out and the fans are not pleased. The exploder is good for the pin. Too short to rate but that ending hurt what was already a bad match.

Video on the Elimination Chamber.

And now, the debate between Muhammad Hassan/Daivari and Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler. Hassan goes into the same speech he’s had every time about how America is racist and it got even worse since 9/11. Lawler says that there are racists and idiots in every country. Hassan has every right to complain about that but when he called the troops cowards, he took it too far.

The reason people don’t like Hassan and Daivari is they’re loudmouth jerks. Daivari goes into a rant but Hassan calms things down. Hassan doesn’t like most Arab Americans because they don’t showcase their heritage. He doesn’t like JR shaking his head at this because Hassan is as American as Mickey Mantle and the Oklahoma Sooners. JR won’t do anything about it though because he’s just like America: angry behind his back but a coward face to face.

JR says America isn’t a perfect place but Hassan and Daivari can love it or leave it (erg). Hassan turns over the podium and punches JR in the ribs, followed by a double team beatdown of Lawler. JR gets choked with a belt but the bloody Lawler takes off his own belt and chases them off, collapsing in the process. This could have been worse, but not that much worse. The RAH RAH AMERICA stuff is wearing thin and WWE knows how to lay it on very thick.

Coach is now doing commentary for the rest of the show. On his own. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish wastes no time in taking her down for some forearms and knees to the face. A hair pull takedown gets two as Victoria is looking like a full on jobber here. Trish chokes her in the corner and a throat first catapult into the bottom rope makes it even worse. Victoria gets in a side slam and rollup for two, followed by the clothesline comeback. The dancing moonsault hits raised knees though and the Chick Kick gives Trish the pin.

Rating: D. What happened to Victoria? She’s one of the best options they have in the division but she’s losing a match like this in a match that is just a step above a squash. It’s not like these two can’t have a good match if they’re given the chance but Trish might as well have been facing Stacy Keibler.

Post match Trish promises to do the same to Lita, so here’s Lita for the slugout. This brings out Snitsky for the save, allowing Trish to hit the Chick Kick. Snitsky grabs a chair but Kane returns to let her escape. Kane and Lita have a bit of a moment.

Video on the Elimination Chamber match from Summerslam 2003. Egads do I really have to think about that one again?

Coach explains why he’s out here alone.

Hassan vs. Lawler is set for Sunday.

Pay per view rundown.

Christy Hemme is doing a photo shoot when Eugene shows up to sing Lindsay Lohan to her. Believe it or not, this is actually dumber than it sounds. Thankfully William Regal comes in for the save with Christy escorting Eugene to the ring. It turns out Regal likes Lohan as well, meaning singing and dancing ensues. This is instantly more entertaining than anything Eugene just did.

Christian vs. Eugene

Christian/Tomko vs. Eugene/Regal for the titles on Sunday. Eugene shoulders him down to start and even shows off some power with the gorilla press into a Warrior Splash (with rope shake of course). Christian finally gets in a shot of his own and a quick distraction lets Tomko drive Eugene back first into the apron. We hit the required neck crank for a bit before Eugene comes back with a Rock Bottom for a very delayed two. Tomko comes in so Eugene forearms him to the floor, leaving Christian to grab a sunset flip (and a rope, since he must have been watching Edge’s match earlier) for the pin.

Rating: D. It’s not a good sign when you’re using the same finish twice in about an hour. This was a perfectly acceptable way to build towards the Tag Team Title match on Sunday, which was announced earlier in the show so it’s not like they can have any less of a story going on. The match was nothing to see of course, but it did what it was supposed to do as well as it could have been asked to.

Evolution (since we haven’t seen them in awhile) is ready for tonight but HHH wants Batista to stay in the back. He only has to beat four guys on Sunday but tonight it’s one on one. Tonight, he needs to show the world that Orton was just a tag along. Flair is all for this while Batista doesn’t seem convinced. He’ll only come out if Orton starts beating HHH up….but that won’t happen.

HHH vs. Randy Orton

Thank goodness JR rejoins commentary for this one. They stare each other down for a good while until Orton snaps off the dropkick to take over early on. A clothesline gives Orton two and it’s time to slug it out. The backdrops has HHH in trouble again and we take a break. Back with HHH being thrown outside again as he hasn’t had any major offense so far. HHH finally manages to snap Orton’s throat across the top to take over and a running knee nearly knocks Orton over the barricade.

Of course that means Flair can get in some stomping because he knows how to cheat properly. Back in and HHH drives shoulders in the corner, followed by another trip to the floor. Flair even gets inside this time for no apparent reason as HHH doesn’t cheat, but Orton manages to send him into the post.

Back in and the powerslam gives Orton two, followed by the backbreaker for the same. The high crossbody gets two more and it’s time to reverse some sleepers. That’s broken up and the ref gets bumped, allowing Flair to slide in the ring bell. Orton takes it away though and blasts HHH, drawing in Batista to hit the big clothesline. That brings in Benoit to cancel out Batista but here’s Shawn to take over as referee.

Edge comes in as well but Jericho stops him from spearing Shawn in some good pre-match sucking up. Jericho dives onto Edge and Batista so Shawn starts counting HHH and Orton as the match is still going. It’s HHH up first but his yelling at Shawn lets Orton….miss the RKO. The Pedigree is countered into a rollup for two and now the RKO gives Orton the pin.

Rating: C-. It was dull until the insanity began, but they might as well just give HHH (who is up against COMPLETELY insurmountable odds) the title now. As usual, Orton wins the match that doesn’t matter and it only took a ring bell, a second referee and half a dozen people getting involved. But hey, HHH certainly put him over here and that’s what mattered.

Overall Rating: C-. The big story here continues to be Batista, who is about to break through the glass ceiling and become the biggest thing on the show if the indications are correct. This show was all about building to the Elimination Chamber as Sunday is a total one match show. That’s perfectly fine and something that has been done before, though there is only so much you can get out of a two hour and forty five minute show with only the main event mattering. They didn’t hide that here, but what they were focusing on got the right amount of attention.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/


And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:


http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6