Wrestlemania XXIX
Date: April 7, 2013
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 80,676
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

With those matches out of the way, the only name left is the Undertaker, who will be facing CM Punk in a match that might have been better had it been for the title. This time it’s personal though, as Paul Bearer had recently passed away, leaving Punk to mock his memory and steal the urn one last time. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: Wade Barrett vs. The Miz

Barrett is defending and Miz is now a good guy who uses the Figure Four. Miz gets sent to the apron to start but slides in for a sunset flip for two. A hard kick to the ribs drops Miz but he’s still able to get his boot up to stop Wade’s running boot. The Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) gets two on the champ, followed by Winds of Change (spinning Boss Man Slam) from Barrett for the same. Barrett’s Bull Hammer (hard elbow to the head) is countered with the Figure Four, sending Wade into the ropes. Not that it matters as Miz sweeps the leg and puts the hold on again for the tap out and the title at 4:05.

Rating: D+. Really quick and nothing match here to fire the crowd up before the real show comes on. Barrett and Miz were both in tailspins at this point and the title was in an even worse place with meaningless title changes like this one. To give you an idea of what this meant, Barrett would get the title back the next night on Raw.

The opening video is narrated by New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, who talks about the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, which leveled huge portions of New Jersey. In the face of all that adversity though, New Jersey stood tall and is still alive today. Everywhere from New York to New Jersey, the people are unbreakable and unstoppable.

The New Jersey National Guard waves American flags.

We get the standard awesome Wrestlemania opening video, again focusing on the Wrestlemania Moment. The Streak actually gets the primary focus here with the other two main events going after. A great line here: “The storied past is only rivaled by the promise of a glorious future.”

We’re back in the company’s home area, hence the theme song called Coming Home.

The set is one of their most detailed ever with the Brooklyn Bridge and Empire State Building over the entrance and the Statue of Liberty over the canopy above the ring.

Sheamus/Randy Orton/Big Show vs. Shield

Shield (Dean Ambrose/Roman Reigns/Seth Rollins. I’ll spare you a description of each.) comes through the crowd as is their custom. Show hasn’t been considered the most trustworthy partner so the question is whether or not the team will implode. Sheamus and Reigns get things going with Roman taking over in the corner and stopping a charge with an elbow.

It’s off to Orton to slam Rollins’ head into the mat and then stomp on his face. Some right hands in the corner and a slingshot suplex get two on Rollins and it’s back to Sheamus. Notice the lack of tagging in Big Show. Ambrose comes in and gets powered down by Sheamus as well, only to have Show tag himself in for a series of rapid fire (well as rapid fire as Show can reach) chops in the corner.

Shield starts going with what brought them to the dance with the fast tags, setting up the top rope knee to Show’s head for two. Dean has lost his shirt as he comes in to stomp Show down, followed by some knees to the head to give Rollins two. Reigns puts on a chinlock (he’s the only member of the team who could make that work) until Show easily throws him down and makes the tag off to Sheamus.

That means Rollins loses his shirt as well for the ten forearms to the chest. Not to be outdone, Ambrose replaces Sheamus and takes a string of forearms of his own. Reigns breaks up the top rope battering ram though as Orton and Show have been taken down off camera. Orton gets triple teamed and it’s a triple stomp on Sheamus back inside.

Show comes back in with a spear to break up the TripleBomb. Sheamus crawls over to tag Show but Orton tags himself in instead to clean house, including catching a springboarding Rollins in the RKO. Reigns comes in with a spear for the pin at 10:34 with Big Show just watching the pin go down.

Rating: C+. Nice opener here as Shield looked good and are clearly the future. Show turning on his partners doesn’t do anything for me as it happens at least twice a year. Orton and Sheamus were great choices to put in on the team as they can take a loss with no damage and are just good enough that you could see them pulling it off. Shield would have far better matches but that wasn’t the point here.

Post match Show knocks his partners out.

Music video on Rock vs. Cena. Haven’t we already paid for the match at this point? We really don’t need to have it hyped again. The theme here is Rock’s legacy vs. Cena’s redemption.

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Ryback has been in a free fall since losing his undefeated streak and needs a win to get his momentum back. Henry hasn’t meant much in awhile but is still strong enough to be a threat to anyone. They slug it out to start with Henry as the strong crowd favorite despite being the heel. New York fans are smart you see. Henry runs him over and grabs a powerslam for one.

A “Sexual Chocolate” chant begins and Henry clotheslines him out to the floor before bringing Ryback inside again for some shots to the back. The bearhug doesn’t last long as Henry throws him outside again, only to put the bearhug on again. Just in case Ryback didn’t learn his lesson the first time. Ryback makes his quick comeback with the Meathook clothesline but Henry grabs the rope to break up the Shellshock. The weight makes Ryback collapse and Henry falls on him for the pin at 8:03.

Rating: D. What the heck was that? They’ve set Ryback up as needing a win and they have him lose here? The only answer would be a losing streak to set up a heel turn, because WWE thinks the best way to get someone over as a heel is to have them lose all their matches first. Really weird decision here but WWE had a lot of those.

Post match Ryback hits the Shell Shock. Henry would lose a World Title shot the next night and Ryback would indeed turn heel, leading a series of pay per view title shots. Why they didn’t have Ryback win here, then have Henry answer an open challenge for the title the next night and then let Ryback have his title series as the bigger threat. Instead they did everything backwards because they do a lot of stupid things.

The announcers play with their new toys with JBL making sure to beat up Rey Mysterio.

The WWE is partnering with the Special Olympics.

Some Special Olympians are here with Stephanie McMahon and Chris Christie.

Tag Team Titles: HELL NO vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

HELL NO (Daniel Bryan/Kane) is defending. Langston is Ziggler’s new bodyguard and an awesome powerhouse. The bell rings and Ziggler kisses AJ (Now with him. As Lawler put it, AJ has been on more manhunts than the FBI.) and walks into a kick to the head from Bryan for two in a nice callback. Ziggler bails to the floor and eats a suicide dive followed by the YES kicks. That’s finally enough to send Ziggler over for the tag and Bryan does the same for the power vs. power match.

Langston throws Kane into the corner and powers out of a chokeslam before running Kane over ala Vader. It’s off to Ziggler who misses a splash in the corner and overshoots the Fameasser. Everything breaks down as Langston breaks up a cover, leaving Ziggler to hit the Zig Zag on Kane for two. AJ throws in the Money in the Bank briefcase, only to have Dolph walk into a chokeslam. Bryan adds the top rope headbutt to retain the titles at 6:17.

Rating: C-. Just a step above a Raw match here which is becoming a problem on this show. Things picked up a lot near the end but what are you going to get out of a six minute match? Bryan and Kane were becoming something special and Ziggler would win the World Heavyweight Championship the next night.

WWE works with Make-A-Wish.

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Fandango is a dancer (formerly known as Johnny Curtis) making his in ring debut here. It had been teased a few times before but he had declined due to someone pronouncing his name wrong (seriously). Jericho was chosen because he kept messing the name up (“Fan-Danny Devito? Fan-B-I-N-G-O-and Bingo was his name-o!”). Fandango comes out with a bunch of dancers before going to ringside with his main dance partner.

Jericho takes him down to start and pounds away with a very early Codebreaker putting Fandango outside for a big dive. Fandango is staggered but finally comes back with an enziguri to take over. JBL is really not pleased with Fandango posing so much because JBL is far too uncultured to understand the power of dance. A chinlock just seems to re-energize Jericho as he comes back with an enziguri of his own, only to be sent into the post.

Now we get Fandango’s real control as he drops his top rope legdrop for two. Yeah they really just had his finisher get two in his debut. Does that mean it’s still his finisher? Jericho breaks up a second legdrop attempt but the Walls are countered into a small package for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C. That’s one of the biggest upsets in Wrestlemania history and it really shouldn’t be that big of a surprise given that Jericho was only around to put people over at this point. The extra time helped a bit but everyone knew that a dancing gimmick was only going to go so far, though it did lead to the INSANE rise of Fandangoing (a dance done to the tune of Fandango’s music) that was the hottest thing in the company for about a week, starting the next night.

Clip of the pre-show match.

Another Rock vs. Cena video with fans quoting Rock’s catchphrases. This is the kind of stuff that really needed to be cut for the sake of more match time.

Here’s a montage of Wrestlemania moments set to music from the Rocky movies, leading to P. Diddy coming out for the musical medley. At least it’s shorter than Kid Rock.

We recap Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger. Del Rio has turned face and won the World Heavyweight Title back in January. Swagger then adopted a new gimmick as the disciple of Zeb Colter (formerly known as Uncle Zebekiah about eighteen years ago), a man who accused ever non-white person of sneaking across the border and being here illegally. The match is a huge culture clash with Swagger wanting to win the title and get rid of Del Rio while Del Rio is standing up for what he believes America is all about. Swagger won the Elimination Chamber to earn this shot.

World Heavyweight Title: Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Swagger is challenging and doesn’t even get an entrance. Did I mention that he had been arrested for DUI and marijuana possession about six weeks before this match? Before the match, Colter rips on New York for being a bunch of people who can’t speak English. Swagger recently broke Ricardo Rodriguez’s ankle but Ricardo limps out here. I had hoped they would get Ricardo deported and then have him make his big return here instead but it’s not that big of a deal.

Swagger bails to the floor to start so Alberto drops him with two boots through the ropes. Back in and a Colter distraction lets Swagger run him over and put on a very quickly broken chinlock. A Vader bomb gets a close two on the champ and Jack drives in some weak shoulders to the ribs. Alberto fires off some clotheslines and even stomps on Colter’s hand, only to have Swagger slam him down to break up the armbreaker attempt.

Swagger finally gets to the point by taking out the leg to set up the Patriot (ankle) Lock. Del Rio easily kicks him away and pounds in forearms to the back, followed by a Backstabber for two. Neither guy can get their submission so Jack settles for a layout powerbomb for two more.

The Patriot Lock goes on but Del Rio takes him down and counters into the armbreaker, only to have Swagger kick the arms away and grab the ankle again. Del Rio gets to the ropes and comes back with the corner enziguri (thankfully limping into it) but has to save Ricardo from Colter. Swagger gets in a few cheap shots but Del Rio grabs the armbreaker back inside for the tap out at 10:30.

Rating: B-. Again the time hurt this but the submission trading with all the counters was really fun stuff. They would have an I Quit match the next month which sounds good on paper, until you realize that Del Rio just beat him by submission here. Del Rio was a good face but for some reason they turned him right back in June. On the other hand, Swagger was dead in the water the second he got arrested which made the match more academic. There were rumors that he was going to win until the arrest, which really does show how much one mistake can screw you up.

WWE supports the National Guard, in case you haven’t been told how awesome the company is in the last half hour.

We recap CM Punk vs. Undertaker, which is mostly about the urn and Paul Bearer’s legacy. Undertaker had been paying tribute to him but Punk interrupted to say that Bearer was lucky enough to not see Undertaker lose his Wrestlemania perfection. Punk spent weeks disrespecting Bearer’s memory with manager Paul Heyman even dressing up like Bearer as a distraction so Punk could beat Undertaker down. Undertaker swore that even if the Streak ended, Punk wouldn’t live to tell about it.

CM Punk vs. Undertaker

Living Colour plays Punk to the ring and Heyman still has the urn. No druids this year but the stage is so close to the fans that you can see hands reaching through the shadows and smoke to try and touch Undertaker. Punk spends the entrance tossing the urn in the air like a ball. Undertaker stalks him into the corner and gets slapped in the face as Punk is trying to win any way he can, including by DQ.

The chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the head so Undertaker takes him to the floor and throws Punk over the timekeeper’s barricade. It’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Undertaker throws him back inside. Old School is broken up as well and Punk actually does his own Old School for a new idea.

Punk starts working on the arm to set up for the Anaconda Vice before throwing him outside for a top rope ax handle. Back in and we hit the chinlock as Heyman talks trash from the floor. Punk makes the eternal mistake of trying the same move twice and crotches himself going for Old School. Heyman breaks up the Taker Dive and Punk gets two off a springboard clothesline.

The Macho Elbow gets the same and Heyman holds up the urn. A quick chokeslam gets two for Undertaker but the big boot is blocked by a leg lariat. They head outside with Punk escaping a Last Ride and kicking Undertaker onto the table. The Macho Elbow doesn’t break the table which had to feel horrible on Punk’s hip and knee. Undertaker beats the count at nine and a half and Punk is shocked. He’s shocked enough that Undertaker grabs Hell’s Gate, only to have Punk roll over into the Anaconda Vice.

In the spot of the match, Undertaker does the situp and stares into Punk’s eyes as the hold is still on. Punk’s confidence is shattered as he looks completely terrified with his best move getting him nowhere. A chokeslam is countered into a bad GTS but Undertaker shrugs it off (to be fair it really didn’t connect) and grabs a Tombstone for two on a hot near fall. They slug it out and there goes the referee.

Punk tries his running knee in the corner but gets countered into the Last Ride. Before he’s dropped, Heyman throws in the urn for a shot to the head and a very close two (done much better with HHH and the sledgehammer at Wrestlemania XVII). The GTS is countered into the Tombstone which is countered into the GTS which is countered into the Tombstone to make it 21-0 at 22:08.

Rating: B+. I liked this better on a second viewing as when I watched live, I never bought the Streak as being in jeopardy. They tried to make the Vice a big deal but at the end of the day, Undertaker does not tap out. Period. Why should I buy this particular submission as having a chance? The urn to the head was a good near fall though and had me closer to thinking it was over than anything in the HHH match two years earlier. Very good match but it never hit the level of the HHH and Shawn editions.

Undertaker poses a lot and retrieves the urn one more time.

Ad for the new Mick Foley DVD.

Here’s a video on Cena wanting his redemption tonight after losing a year ago. This makes over ten minutes spent on these things.

Sports commentator Michelle Beadle is here.

We recap HHH vs. Lesnar II. They fought at Summerslam 2012 with Lesnar making HHH tap out. HHH teased retiring as a result (again taking the focus off Lesnar as the last shot of the show was HHH standing in the ring alone) and after no one bought it, Lesnar attacked Vince and Shawn to set up the rematch here. To make it even more intense, it’s no holds barred with HHH’s career on the line. (which was announced with the same intensity as last year’s Cell match). Just in case you had any doubt that HHH was winning here you see.

At the end of the day though, everyone knew this was all about HHH getting his redemption over Lesnar because Lesnar is the latest monster trying to stop HHH’s precious legacy, even though Lesnar is anything but just another monster. Unfortunately that’s how Lesnar was billed and it made this feud even less interesting. The first match was fine, but this was the least interesting rematch in a long time.

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Shawn and Heyman are here as seconds and remember it’s no holds barred. HHH sends him to the floor to start and whips Brock hard into the barricade. You know, the same Brock who destroyed Cena when they fought about a year ago? Well HHH is beating him up a minute into the match. The fans are silent but it’s in awe of the awesomeness I’m sure.

HHH knocks a chair out of Lesnar’s hands but Heyman is smart enough to grab the chair before HHH can get it. A whip into the steps has no effect on Brock as he belly to bellys HHH on the floor (now that’s more like it). HHH gets suplexed through the announcers’ table and Brock is in Beast Mode. Brock throws him onto the pieces of the table and a single glare at Shawn sends him SPRINTING away. Yeah because a Hall of Famer and one of the best ever just isn’t good enough to stand up to Brock the way HHH did.

Back in and a series of suplexes gets a series of two counts. Brock goes after Shawn on the floor but the distraction lets HHH get in a clothesline to put Lesnar in the timekeeper’s area. That goes nowhere though as Brock Germans him again and elbows Shawn in the face. You don’t mess with HHH’s life partner though and he plants Brock with a spinebuster. The Pedigree is countered into an F5 but Shawn comes in for a superkick, only to take the F5 instead.

HHH grabs a quick Pedigree for two but the sledgehammer shot is countered with an F5 for another two. They go outside again with HHH going into the steps, which are then sent inside for more fun. Brock hits him with the steps for two and tells HHH to retire, igniting HHH’s comeback. Cole: “A little flame in the game!” The Kimura (Brock’s arm lock) has HHH in trouble but he breaks it up as the fans want to see a broken arm.

Brock gets it on for the fourth time in a row with his legs wrapped around HHH’s waist, only to get powered into a spinebuster for the break. HHH is MANLY you see. A low blow keeps Brock down and HHH wraps his arm around the post. He crushes Brock’s arm with a chair for good measure and there’s a Kimura from HHH. So he’s a submission guy too. Heyman tries to come in for the save but Shawn superkicks him down. See, Heyman isn’t some big monster that would scare Shawn.

Thankfully Brock doesn’t tap as he lifts HHH up and slams him onto the steps. HHH grabs the hold again so Brock counters it the same way. It worked so well that they do it AGAIN, but since HHH is so smart he counters into a DDT onto the steps. The sledgehammer to the head and a Pedigree onto the steps ends Brock at 23:58.

Rating: B-. This was HHH’s big thank you for putting Lesnar over last year, because a win over HHH means SO much at this point. Let’s recap: HHH is able to beat Brock in a slugout, knows how to do UFC submissions, isn’t a coward like Shawn (that Hall of Fame World Champion), can survive suplexes and F5’s and isn’t hurt by things like Kimuras.

HHH looked like a god here and it was so ridiculous for a long majority of the match. The fans’ silence was so telling as they just did not want to see HHH get his big moment, no matter how much HHH demanded that he get it. Oh and they had ANOTHER match the next month too, stretching their feud to a year. At least HHH was nice enough to put Lesnar over there, because he couldn’t do it here at the show people remember most.

Hall of Fame video, with a STACKED lineup.

Here’s the Class of 2013: Mick Foley, Booker T. (probably the lowest level wrestler in the class), Trish Stratus, Bob Backlund, Donald Trump (booed here but he’s been at five Wrestlemanias now) and the headliner: Bruno Sammartino (so long overdue it’s unreal). If there’s ever been a better class, I’ve yet to see it.

Wrestlemania XXX is in New Orleans.

The new attendance record is announced.

No recap of the main event but I think you get the idea by now.

WWE World Title: John Cena vs. The Rock

Rock is defending. Cena is booed out of the building even worse than he was last year, which I didn’t think was possible. After the big match intros, Cena runs him over with a shoulder to start. Rock nails one of his own and it’s a standoff. They circle each other for a bit as the fans are restless, leaving Cole to explain Rock’s history.

Rock takes over with some right hands and a kick to the face but Cena grabs a belly to belly. A chinlock keeps the match slow until Rock reverses into a sleeper. Cena counters with another suplex and stomps down as JBL actually says Rock and Cena compete in movies. A release fisherman’s suplex gets two on the champ and good grief do something interesting already.

Rock comes back with right hands before ducking a shoulder. The STF is broken up but now some weak shoulders have Rock in trouble. Well they’re certainly doing something now. A much better Sharpshooter has Cena in trouble but he rolls away and hits the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle misses so Cena settles for the STF, only to have Rock reverse into a rollup for two.

Cena catapults him into the corner and now the Shuffle connects. The AA is broken up and Rock plants him with the spinebuster, only to have the People’s Elbow countered into another STF. Rock rolls onto his side and separates Cena’s hands for the break in a good power display. Back up and a Rock Bottom out of nowhere gets two. There’s an AA for two with almost no one buying the near fall.

Rock avoids the top rope Fameasser and scores with the spinebuster into the Elbow for two more. Just like last year, Rock goes up for a cross body but gets caught in the AA, only to slip out and hit the Rock Bottom. Instead of covering though he tries the Shuffle, allowing Cena to hit another AA for two. Cena wins a slugout and Rock Bottoms Rock (BIG reaction for that) but the kickout stuns him all over again.

Just like last year (again), Cena tries the Elbow but is ready for Rock, only to take too much time setting up the AA and getting countered into the Rock Bottom for two. They counter each others’ finishers about five times in a row (with little energy on any of them) until Rock plants him with a DDT. Another Rock Bottom is countered into another AA to give Cena the title back at 24:00.

Rating: B-. While it’s still entertaining, there was almost no emotion in this. It felt like both guys were just going through the motions to get to the obvious ending and that’s not good. As we’ve seen over the years, there are ways to have an entertaining match with an obvious ending but that’s not what happened here. Instead this was a bunch of finishing moves over and over after about ten minutes of nothing to start. It’s still a good enough match, but they really needed more intensity here. At least look like you’re giving it everything you have even if you really aren’t.

One last thing of note: at some point, Rock ripped his abdominal muscle and suffered a hernia. Reports vary about when it happened (ranging from in the opening to the first AA to the final AA) but it’s a major reason why Rock hasn’t had a match since. This is WAY too dangerous for him to be doing when he’s needed on movie sets and it will probably keep him out of the ring for good, save for maybe one more farewell match.

They shake hands post match and say something to each other than the cameras can’t pick up. Cena leaves Rock in the ring to pose until Rock comes up to the stage to raise Cena’s hand and end the show.

Overall Rating: C. In a word, this show was just there. There’s good stuff on it but nothing feels like it matters. Instead we have a bunch of good to decent matches with the crowd (and remember a good chunk of it is a New York crowd) not caring. The last two matches are especially bad about this as they were rematches that people didn’t want to see. The HHH vs. Lesnar rematch was even worse about this as there was no need to have a rematch other than to make HHH look good. Rock vs. Cena wasn’t as bad about that but it also wasn’t as entertaining of a match.

Undertaker vs. Punk is definitely the best match of the show due to the good story behind it and the execution helps even more. I still didn’t believe that Punk was a real threat to the streak but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t entertaining. Punk got in a lot more offense than I was expecting and had some near falls to make it good. There was no way Undertaker was going out in his tribute to Bearer though.

The rest of the card is where the show falls apart. There’s some watchable stuff but so much of it feels like it belongs on Raw. None of the first five matches break eleven minutes and I really didn’t have much interest in seeing Chris Jericho lose to a newcomer, even if it was one of the biggest upsets ever. The first half of this show had the problem of not feeling like a Wrestlemania, which is one of the worst things that can happen. The second half is a huge improvement, but nowhere near enough to make this required viewing.

Ratings Comparison

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Original: D+

2014 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D+

Shield vs. Randy Orton/Sheamus/Big Show

Original: B-

2014 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

2014 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston vs. HELL NO

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D

2014 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C

Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

2014 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: B-

Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Original: B

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B+

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

John Cena vs. The Rock

Original: C+

2014 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2014 Redo: B

2015 Redo: C

There’s good stuff in there but it’s swimming with an anchor.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/07/wrestlemania-xxix-and-so-it-ends/

And the 2014 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/04/05/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxix-redo-twice-in-a-lifetime/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXIX
Date: April 7, 2013
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 80,676
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s hard to believe this show was almost a year ago. The main event is of course Rock vs. Cena II in the sequel that not a lot of people wanted to see. Other than that we have CM Punk challenging the Streak and HHH vs. Brock Lesnar in another sequel that not a lot of people wanted to see. I wasn’t too hot on this show live but Wrestlemania is always worth checking out. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett is defending. Miz backflips out of an early belly to back suplex attempt and gets two off a fast rollup. He tries to jump over Barrett in the corner though and gets kicked in the ribs to give the champion control. Barrett: “How awesome is he now?” Miz is laid on the top rope and a running knee to his ribs gets two. Barrett loads up his boot to the face with Miz in the ropes but Miz gets his own foot up instead.

The Reality Check gets two for Miz but both guys escape finishers. Winds of Change gets a close two for Wade but Miz ducks the Bull Hammer and hooks the Figure Four. Barrett is quickly into the ropes though and pops up with Wasteland for two. Miz picks the leg and takes Barrett to the mat for the Figure Four and the title out of nowhere.

Rating: C. This was perfectly fine as they wanted to fire the fans up before the show got started. It’s amazing how far these two have fallen in the last year as Miz is floundering even more and Barrett is a one note character. This result wouldn’t mean anything as Barrett got the title match the very next night.

New Jersey Governor Chris Christie talks about Hurricane Sandy hitting New Jersey back in October and destroying a lot of the Jersey Shore. But the people of New Jersey fought back and rose up along with New York because they’re unbreakable and unstoppable.

The opening video talks about moments that change the world forever and how they make time stand still.

I still like the female part of that I’m Coming Home song.

Sheamus/Randy Orton/Big Show vs. Shield

The three guys had been having issues with Shield for months now. At this point, Shield still hasn’t lost a six man tag and Big Show isn’t trustworthy but he’s a necessary ally. Basically everyone thought Orton was going to be the one to turn on his partners here though. Thankfully Shield doesn’t come from the top of the stadium this time. Reigns starts with Sheamus and they slug it out in the corner. The cameras are all over the place as they keep switching angles.

A running ax handle puts Reigns down and a clothesline is good for one. Orton comes in and drops a knee before hitting the Garvin Stomp. Rollins comes in but walks into a dropkick followed by ten right hands in the corner. The fans are WAY into this so far. Back to Sheamus who gets his knee dropkicked out, allowing Ambrose to come in for some fast stomping. The fans are even more into Ambrose but he walks into a powerslam for two. Sheamus goes to tag Orton but Big Show tags himself in instead.

Show rips the vest off Ambrose for the chop in the corner but Dean tries a chop of his own. That just makes Big Show mad so he hits ten straight chops. Dean dropkicks Big Show in the knee just like Sheamus got earlier and it’s back to Rollins who tries to keep Big Show down. Shield starts their fast tags as Cole says they’re like a swarm of hornets. Rollins hits some running knees to the head for two before it’s back to Reigns for a chinlock. Show suplexes his way to freedom but Rollins knocks Orton to the floor.

The giant backdrops Rollins from his knees and the hot tag brings in Sheamus. The Irishman rips the vest off of Rollins for the ten forearms. Ambrose gets a tag and is immediately caught in the ten forearms as well. There’s the rolling fireman’s carry to Ambrose and another one to Rollins who lands on Dean. Reigns pulls Sheamus outside though and the double teaming begins.

Orton is whipped into Rollins to put both guys down but Shield throws Rollins back inside. The Triple Bomb to Sheamus is broken up by a Big Show spear in a nice visual and everyone is down. Show reaches out for a tag but Orton takes it himself, ticking Big Show off. Randy loads up the RKO on Ambrose but has to catch a springboarding Rollins in an RKO. Reigns comes in with the spear though and puts Dean on top for the pin as Big Show watches from the apron.

Rating: C+. It’s amazing that Shield is actually still together a year later and have become even more dominant. I thought they would win the match coming into this and I’m glad the first loss wasn’t here at Wrestlemania. The match wasn’t bad but it didn’t have the time or the near falls that make most Shield matches awesome. Still though, good opener and Big Show was somewhat justified in his actions.

Big Show yells at Orton post match and knocks out both of his partners.

Music video on Rock vs. Cena II with the theme of legacy vs. redemption.

Snooki is here.

Mark Henry vs. Ryback

This is a simple idea: how big of a guy can Ryback Shell Shock? Henry also choked Ryback during a bench press challenge a few weeks earlier. Ryback was on fire a few months before this but has fallen through the floor in the time since. They stare each other down to start before Ryback wins an early slugout. Some clotheslines put Henry against the ropes but he runs Ryback over to a big pop. A powerslam gets two for Henry and we get a Sexual Chocolate chant.

Ryback can’t suplex him but Mark lifts Ryback up and places him on the apron for a ram into the buckle. Back in and Henry pounds on the spine before we hit the bearhug. Ryback is thrown outside but he dives back inside at two. The bearhug goes on again but Ryback fights out and drives Mark into the corner. There’s the Meat Hook and Ryback easily picks Mark up for the Shell Shock, drawing Ryback’s first pop of the match. Henry grabs the ropes though and falls onto Ryback for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing but a slow power match here though the Shell Shock attempt looked good. The booking still doesn’t make sense to me as Henry would challenge Cena to a title match tomorrow night before Ryback closed the show by turning heel and getting the title shot on PPV. Why not have Ryback win here, have Henry answer the open challenge, and THEN have Ryback go after Cena, saying Henry almost beat Cena (he did) so imagine what Ryback could do. The whole thing was backwards. Anyway the match wasn’t great and they only kind of did the Shell Shock, which was the whole point of the thing.

Post match Henry goes back in to stomp on Ryback some more but the Big Guy fights back and Shell Shocks Henry. Again, why not have that be the ending?

The announcers play with the new WWE action figures. JBL beats up the Rey Mysterio toy in some nice continuity.

Video on the WWE partnering with the Special Olympics.

Some Special Olympians are here with Stephanie McMahon and Chris Christie.

Tag Team Titles: HELL NO vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston

This is Langston’s in ring debut and his team is challenging. AJ is with them as well and Dolph is Mr. Money in the Bank. Bryan’s beard is only a foot or so long here. We get a nice bit of continuity to start with Ziggler kissing AJ on the apron after the bell, allowing Bryan to kick him in the head for a close two. The YES Kicks have Ziggler in trouble but he dives to the corner after ducking the big one. Both power guys come in now and it’s Kane taking over with right hands to the face, only to be caught in a series of backbreakers.

Langston runs Kane over and it’s back to Ziggler who gets two off a dropkick. Dolph doesn’t stay in long as he tags Big E. back in, only to have him get caught by a running DDT. Now it’s already back to Ziggler who walks into a side slam. Kane misses the top rope clothesline but Ziggler almost entirely botches the Fameasser, meaning it’s only good for two. A hard clothesline drops Ziggler but Big E. breaks it up at the last second. Langston nails the Big Ending but Bryan takes him to the floor. AJ throws in the briefcase but misses the big show, allowing Kane to hit the chokeslam, setting up Bryan’s Swan Dive to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. This was more short than anything else. They seemed to be teasing leaving Ziggler fresh so he could cash in later which people were expecting like the birth of a child at this point. HELL NO was a good team and a good stepping stone for Bryan to the main event scene in the coming months.

Make-A-Wish video starring John Cena.

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

This is the dancing feud so Fandango has a full dance troupe with his original brunette dance partner, soon to be replaced by Summer Rae. It’s also Fandango’s in ring debut under this name. Fandango dances to start but is quickly taken down to the mat by Jericho. A hard slap sends the dancer to the floor before Jericho brings him back inside and hammers away in the corner. The fans are entirely behind the Canadian here.

Fandango jumps over him in the corner but walks into the Codebreaker to send him out to the floor. A hard baseball slide drops Fandango again and a BIG dive off the top knocks him to the floor. Back in and Jericho slaps him in the face but Fandango enziguris Jericho down to break up the springboard dropkick. Fandango stomps away before putting on a chinlock as Jericho’s forehead is cut open.

Jericho fights up and runs Fandango over with some shoulders before hitting a top rope dropkick. A Thesz Press of all things drops Fandango and there’s an enziguri to make up for earlier. Fandango sends him shoulder first into the post to take over again and the guillotine legdrop gets two.

Back up and Jericho counters a dropkick into a Walls attempt but Fandango kicks away. He goes up again but Jericho shakes the ropes to bring him down. A superplex is countered by a series of headbutts, only to have Jericho avoid another legdrop attempt. The Lionsault connects but Jericho tweaks his knee, allowing Fandango to small package him for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t bad for the most part and I’m not sure I can argue against it being the biggest upset in Wrestlemania history. Fandango may have wrestled as Johnny Curtis before but this was his debut as the character, making it a big deal to have him win here. Jericho has always been great at making people look good and that’s exactly what he did here.

We look back at the pre-show match with Miz winning the Intercontinental Title.

Another video on Rock vs. Cena, this time focusing on Rock and his fans. By this I mean fans saying Rock’s catchphrases.

We get a video of classic Wrestlemania moments set to the song playing in the Rocky Balboa vs. Apollo Creed fight in the first Rocky movie. This leads into a Sean Combs medley.

We recap Del Rio vs. Swagger. It’s a basic story: Del Rio is from Mexico and Swagger’s new manager Zeb Colter is very anti-foreigner. He’s as close to a white supremacist as you’ll get in modern WWE and rants about how evil foreigners are crippling America. The government won’t do anything about it so Jack Swagger will instead. He won the Elimination Chamber to earn the title shot here and has injured Ricardo’s ankle coming into the match.

Del Rio had turned face late last year and was on a roll as champion. He was suddenly a patriot who loved America but was also proud of being from Mexico. The character worked very well and his matches got about a hundred times better. Even I was digging Del Rio around this time while I’m not generally a good fan.

World Heavyweight Championship: Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

After all that, Swagger doesn’t even get an entrance. AT WRESTLEMANIA. Colter goes into a rant about how horrible this country is because of how many other languages people speak now, including Chinese and Yiddish. However, Swagger will fix everything tonight by winning the World Heavyweight Championship. Del Rio wears an old school robe and after the big match intros we’re ready to go.

Del Rio quickly sends him to the floor and sends Swagger into the announcers’ table but gets trippled by Colter. Back inside and Jack sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. A quick rollup gets two for the champion but Jack drops him with a kick to the head. The Vader Bomb gets two but Del Rio counters Jack instead of having his knee wrapped around the post. Back in and Jack runs into a boot to the face before taking a few clotheslines to put the champion back in control.

Alberto stomps on Colter’s hand for good measure before the low superkick gets two. The armbreaker is countered into a kind of powerslam for a very close two as Jack is in control again. Jack takes out the knee and puts on the Patriot Lock but Alberto quickly kicks away. He misses the enziguri in the corner though and Jack stays up. Del Rio comes right back with a series of forearms in the corner and the Backstabber is good for two.

The champion hits a German suplex but takes his time following up. His cross armbreaker is countered into the gutwrench powerbomb to give Swagger a two count and there’s the Patriot Lock again. Alberto is almost to the ropes but Jack pulls him back into the middle. Instead Del Rio pulls him down into the armbreaker but Jack counters that into the Patriot Lock.

This time Alberto makes the ropes before countering another gutwrench suplex into a kick to the head. He limps into the corner enziguri for two as Colter puts Swagger’s leg on the ropes. Zeb goes even more evil by kicking Ricardo’s leg out to draw Del Rio outside, allowing Jack to send him into the barricade. Back in and Alberto grabs the armbreaker out of nowhere to retain the title. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C+. This was getting good in the middle but they ran to the finish almost immediately. There’s a chemistry there and I’d love to see them do stuff on the mat and trade submissions for fifteen minutes. Instead it didn’t even get eleven and they cut off the technical stuff to go for the manager. That being said, it’s still a good match but it could have been great.

WWE supports the National Guard.

We recap Undertaker vs. CM Punk. As usual, Punk is trying to break the Streak but this time there’s an added caveat. Undertaker’s long term manager Paul Bearer recently passed away and Punk interrupted Undertaker’s tribute to him to promise to break the Streak. He even stole Bearer’s Urn and tossed it around like a football before dropping it on the concrete.

CM Punk vs. Undertaker

Living Colour plays Punk to the ring and Heyman is still at his side here. As always, Undertaker’s entrance is just freaking cool. Punk slaps him in the face to start and fires off forearms in the corner. Undertaker misses another big right hand and gets slapped in the face, so this time he just kicks Punk in the face. Punk is thrown out to the floor and into the timekeeper’s area where Undertaker nails him in the head again. The Dead Man loads up the announce table rams Punk into the post before being thrown back inside.

There’s a right hand to the head as the dueling chants begin. Taker drops the leg on the apron before driving his shoulder into Punk’s to set up Old School. Punk pulls him down off the top rope with an armdrag though and starts ramming elbows into Undertaker’s head. In something I can’t remember seeing from anyone else, Punk hits Old School to Undertaker. You can see how much he’s loving this and the facials are making it so much better.

Punk nails a Russian legsweep and cranks on Undertaker’s right arm. That goes nowhere as Undertaker puts him into the corner and hammers away but hits his own knee on a charge. A baseball slide puts Undertaker on the floor and Punk drops a top rope ax handle (with the finger poke of course). Back in and Punk gets two off a neckbreaker but Undertaker comes back with right hands. A high kick gets two for Punk as Heyman shouts about CM getting more and more momentum.

We hit the chinlock on the taller guy but Taker quickly fights up, only to charge into a boot to the face. Punk tries another Old School but crotches himself on the top rope. A big right hand puts Punk on the floor but Heyman gets on the apron to block the Taker Dive. The distraction lets Punk hit another neckbreaker for two. Punk nails the running knee in the corner followed by the Macho Elbow for another near fall. Taker escapes a GTS attempt and plants Punk with a chokeslam for two of his own.

A big series of right hands has Punk covering up in the corner and it’s the snake eyes and big boot combo but Punk leg lariats Undertaker down to block the boot. The dueling chants pick up again before Punk sends Taker back to the floor. An uppercut slows Punk down but he’s able to escape a Last Ride through the table. He kicks Undertaker in the head to set up the Macho Elbow onto the table, which doesn’t break. That always looks sick.

Both guys are down and Punk looks to have injured his leg. Punk is able to get back inside and we tease a countout until Undertaker dives back in at nine. Back in and Undertaker tries Hell’s Gate but can’t quite get it on. Punk flips over for two and hooks the Anaconda Vice. Undertaker’s shoulders stay down for two but he sits up and stares Punk in the eyes for a great counter.

The chokeslam is countered into the GTS but Taker bounces into the ropes and hits the Tombstone for a very close two. They slug it out but Punk’s shots have no effect. Taker loads up the chokeslam but Punk shoves the referee down. Heyman distracts Undertaker but Punk injures his knee by kicking Undertaker in the ribs. The Last Ride is countered by an urn shot for another close two. The GTS is countered into a Tombstone which is countered into a GTS which is countered into a Tombstone to make Undertaker 21-0.

Rating: B. I liked the match but it’s still not as good as it’s made out to be. The urn to the head into the Undertaker cover was done better at Wrestlemania X7 and I never bought Punk’s covers as serious threats. It’s still a good match and I was into it more than the match at Wrestlemania 27, but it’s still not Punk getting inches away from breaking the Streak like it’s been made out to be.

Undertaker picks up the Urn for a nice tribute to Bearer.

Ad for the Mick Foley DVD.

Video on Cena, focusing on redemption.

Michelle Beadle is here.

We recap HHH vs. Brock Lesnar. They started feuding the night after Extreme Rules 2012 when Lesnar broke HHH’s arm, setting up a match at Summerslam. Brock beat HHH by breaking his arm again and HHH thought about walking away. However, Lesnar attacked Vince and put him in the hospital. This fired up HHH enough to want a rematch here at Wrestlemania on the grandest stage of them all. Brock also broke Shawn Michaels’ arm and you know that’s too far for HHH.

It’s No DQ and if HHH loses he has to retire. This is of course completely different from the no holds barred match at Summerslam. From what I remember, a grand total of no one wanted to see a rematch but it’s HHH at Wrestlemania so you knew it had to happen. The stipulations dropped the interest even further.

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Shawn and Heyman are in the respective corners. As always, Brock looks nothing short of terrifying. HHH has powder all over himself as he comes out through a skull entrance. They slug it out to start and of course HHH gets the better of it. Remember when Brock just destroyed Cena and Big Show with right hands? Forget that, because they’re not HHH. A knee to the ribs finally puts Lesnar in control but they fall out to the floor. Lesnar is sent into the barricade and then into the announce table as HHH is dominating in the first minute.

Brock comes back with a chair but misses a swing and hits the steps. They head into the crowd with HHH clotheslining him back to ringside. Back in and HHH blocks the chair shot with a running knee before throwing Brock back to the floor. Brock goes head first into the steps but comes right back with an overhead belly to belly. There is a MASSIVE bruise on Brock’s left pectoral. Shawn is looking concerned as Brock suplexes HHH through the announce table and roars.

Another overhead belly to belly on to the remnants of the table have HHH reeling. Back in and Brock stomps away in the corner before charging into a boot. Not that it matters as he comes right back with a third belly to belly for two. HHH tries to elbow out of a German but gets thrown down again with ease. Another German gets two but HHH fires off right hands, only to be whipped over the corner and out to the floor.

Brock glares at Shawn long enough for HHH to come back with a big running clothesline. Another clothesline puts Brock in the timekeeper’s area and there’s a big chair shot to his back. Back in and Brock snaps off another German for two before knocking Shawn off the apron with a big right hand. Trips comes back again with a spinebuster because he’s capable of going move for move with Brock Lesnar. A Pedigree is countered into an F5 attempt but Brock lets go to avoid a superkick from Shawn. It’s Michaels taking the F5 instead, only to have Lesnar take the Pedigree for two.

The sledgehammer is brought in but Brock ducks the shot and takes a massive F5 for two. They head outside again with HHH being whipped hard into the steps. The steps bounce off HHH’s head before Brock throws them into the ring for some fun. Another shot with the steps is good for two as the fans aren’t really responding to a lot of these near falls. Even Heyman says that’s enough but HHH slaps Brock in the face.

A slugout (won by HHH of course) is countered into the Kimura but HHH drives him into the corner for the break. The same hold is countered the same way before Brock puts him on the middle rope to slap the hold on again. HHH lifts Brock into the air and puts him down with another spinebuster to break. Brock misses a charge into the post and HHH hits a hard low blow to put both guys down. HHH crushes the arm against the post with a chair as

Shawn is laid against the barricade with his head up watching. Another chair shot to the arm crushes it against the steps and HHH puts on a Kimura of his own. Heyman tries to interfere but walks into a superkick. Brock finally powers up and slams HHH down onto the steps for another break. HHH grabs the hold again and gets slammed down onto the steps one more time. There’s a third Kimura to Brock but he plants lifts HHH into the air, only to be countered into a DDT on the steps. A sledgehammer to the face sets up the Pedigree on the steps for the pin.

Rating: B. As mentioned earlier, the match was good but the interest just wasn’t there. The times when HHH was able to go punch for punch with Lesnar were just ridiculous but we live in HHH’s WWE anymore. At least he didn’t make Lesnar submit to an MMA hold and Lesnar got to break some stuff. The match is certainly entertaining and I can live with HHH winning at Wrestlemania, but they had to keep it going one more match as a result which was pure overkill.

Hall of Fame time. This year’s class includes Mick Foley, Trish Stratus, Bob Backlund, Booker T, Donald Trump and of course Bruno Sammartino.

Wrestlemania XXX is in New Orleans.

The new attendance record: 80,676.

WWE Championship: John Cena vs. The Rock

Twice in a lifetime. Rock is of course the crowd favorite and defending. After the big match intros we’re ready to go. Cena grabs a headlock to start as they have a lot of time to work with here. A hard shoulder puts Rock down before they do the exact same sequence with the roles reversed. Rock grabs a second headlock before throwing him down with a hiptoss. Cena bails for a bit before taking over with right hands and a hard whip into the corner.

The fans are entirely behind Rock here as he comes back with more right hands and a hard whip of his own. More mirroring of the other. Some shots to the chest have Cena in trouble but he comes back with a clothesline followed by a chinlock. Back up and a belly to belly gets two on Rock before we’re back in the hold again. Rock counters into a sleeper as the crowd is oddly quiet.

That goes nowhere so Rock grabs a Samoan drop to put both guys down again. Cena gets two off a fisherman’s suplex but misses the tackle. The STF doesn’t work either and Rock grabs his bad looking Sharpshooter. That goes nowhere as Cena powers out and initiates his finishing sequence, only to miss the Shuffle. A Rock Bottom is countered into a bad looking crossface (not the STF Cole you dolt) but Rock rolls out.

Now the Shuffle connects but the AA is countered into a spinebuster. The Elbow takes too long though and now the STF (JBL: “THERE is the STF Michael!”) goes on, only to have Rock power out of it. The Rock Bottom gets two and so does the AA, with the latter allegedly ripping Rock’s abdomen apart and giving him a hernia which means he’s probably never wrestling again because insurance companies don’t want to deal with that risk.

Cena misses the top rope Fameasser and now the Elbow connects for two. John rolls outside so Rock can recover a bit. Back in and Rock wins a slugout but tries a cross body which is of course easily caught. Cena looks bored catching him like that. The AA is countered into another Rock Bottom followed by more laying around. Rock tries the Elbow again complete with You Can’t See Me but he runs into the AA for two more. They slug it out yet again and Cena hits a Rock Bottom of his own for two.

John loads up the People’s Elbow just like last year but hangs onto the ropes when Rock gets up. The AA is countered into yet another Rock Bottom for yet another two. They counter finishers again until Rock nails a DDT to break the finisher streak at like 8. Back up and another Rock Bottom is countered into another AA to give Cena the title back.

Rating: B-. Now just to clarify, they did get in some finishers right? This was bordering on parody with all of those kickouts as they went from headlocks and shoulders to Rock Bottom/AA a go-go for the last ten minutes. It was entertaining for the most part but much like any other match, when you pound finishers into the ground like they, they stop meaning anything.

They say something we can’t hear and shake hands after the match. Cena leaves Rock alone in the ring and waits for him on the stage. They pose together to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The show is definitely entertaining and I shortchanged some stuff when I watched it live. My main criticism still holds up though: nothing felt big here. Even a year later, what is important here? Cena won the title, only to have Bryan charge up the ladder and become the real star after Cena feuded with Ryback for a few months. Lesnar and HHH had their real blowoff a month later. Punk vs. Undertaker was good but the real moment for Punk was at MITB.

Overall the show works well enough and is entertaining for a one off viewing, but it doesn’t feel like a big deal. The two main events are both rematches from the previous year and that isn’t the best idea for Wrestlemania. It didn’t help that the last three matches all had really obvious endings so it was more about just killing time rather than any intrigue. Still though, all three of those matches are at least good and there’s nothing really horrible so it’s definitely a solid show.

Ratings Comparison

The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Original: D+

Redo: C

Shield vs. Randy Orton/Sheamus/Big Show

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

Redo: D

Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston vs. HELL NO

Original: C

Redo: D+

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Original: D

Redo: C

Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Original: B

Redo: B

HHH vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: B

John Cena vs. The Rock

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/07/wrestlemania-xxix-and-so-it-ends/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 

Wrestlemania XXIX
Date: April 7, 2013
Location: MetLife Stadium, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 80,676
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

We have arrived at the biggest night of the year. The main events is John Cena vs. The Rock II for the WWE Championship. If that isn’t enough for you to get into this, we also have Brock vs. HHH II, Undertaker vs. Punk and Del Rio vs. Swagger for the Smackdown Title. The show looks great, the matches look good, the WWE is going home, and it’s Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Miz is challenging. This match was set up because both guys had movies out at the same time but that has since been dropped. Miz beat Barrett on Raw a few weeks ago as well. Miz escapes a belly to back suplex to start and gets two off a quick sunset flip. Barrett gets in a kick in the corner to take over but Miz blocks the kick in the ropes. The Reality Check gets two for Miz before the Wasteland and Skull Crushing Finale are both countered.

Winds of Change get two for Barrett but the Bull Hammer misses. Miz takes the legs out and puts on the Figure Four but Barrett gets a rope. Wasteland hits this time for two and Wade is frustrated. In a unique counter, Miz trips up Barrett and puts on the Figure Four from the mat for the submission and the title at 4:10.

Rating: D+. What do you want here? It’s a four minute match and not a very good one at that. At the end of the day, Miz isn’t anything special, the match was nothing special, Barrett hasn’t meant anything of note in forever, the title means nothing, and the match was four minutes long. How in the world are they supposed to get anything of note going? The answer is they aren’t, because that’s what a pre-show match is for.

The opening video is about Hurricane Sandy and is narrated by New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, who talks about New Jersey rising up due to its great spirit.

The National Guard waves a bunch of American flags.

The real opening video talks about growing up and making an impact on the grandest stage of them all. It’s your standard video about making a Wrestlemania moment, but well done.

Much like previous years, there’s a big canopy setup, but this year there’s a Statue of Liberty over the ring.

Shield vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton

Surprising choice for an opener. Thankfully Shield doesn’t come down from the upper deck of the arena. Sheamus and Reigns get us going and the pale one pounds away from one corner to the other. This is already longer than Sheamus’ match from last year. A forearm puts Reigns down as does a hard clothesline for two. Off to Orton for the knee drop and some stomping. We get Cole’s first error of the night as he says Orton won the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania 24 (he retained).

Reigns gets in some shots to the head and it’s off to Rollins. That goes badly as well for Shield as he gets pounded in the corner and suplexed down. Back to Sheamus but Seth gets in a dropkick to the knee to take him down. Ambrose gets the tag and it’s time for some evil double teaming. Sheamus will have none of that though and powerslam Ambrose down for two. Orton is ready for a tag but Show tags himself in instead. He rips Ambrose’s vest open for the LOUD chop and Dean wants another one. Instead he gets about five in a row and a splash in the corner.

Dean actually comes back and dropkicks the knee out to bring in Rollins. A top rope kick gets two on Show and it’s off to Reigns for some hard shots to Show’s back. Ambrose is back in now, sans all of his vest and shirt. Back to Rollins as Shield is tagging in and out very fast. A running kick to the face gets two for Rollins and it’s back to Roman for the chinlock. Big Show fights up with a belly to back suplex but Rollins takes out Orton to break up the tag. That’s fine with Show though as he brings in Sheamus instead for some fast and hard hitting knees to the chest.

Rollins gets his own vest split open and there are the ten forearms to the chest. Ambrose tags himself in from the apron and there are ten forearms for him as well. The Regal Roll puts Dean down and Sheamus hits one on Rollins as well, this one on top of Ambrose. Reigns breaks up something from Sheamus off the top and everything breaks down. Rollins dives through the ropes at Orton and slams his own head into the barricade. Sheamus is triple teamed in the ring but as Shield loads up the TripleBomb, Show spears them all down for the save.

Ambrose is the only one still in the ring for Shield as Sheamus is crawling to the corner. He reaches for Big Show but Orton tags himself in instead. The powerslam sets up the Elevated DDT and Big Show is ticked off. Orton loads up the RKO on Ambrose but Rollins springboards into the RKO instead. Reigns spears Orton down as Big Show watches from the apron for the pin at 10:34.

Rating: B-. Not as good as I was hoping for here but it was still a good match and a fine opener. This was more about the trio instead of the Shield, which is ok I guess but I’m hoping Shield gets to have their moment later on. The good thing here though is that Reigns got a 100% clean pin on Orton. It wasn’t Shield picking the bones. It was a spear and a pin. That’s a big help for the team and a good sign for them.

Big Show knocks out both of his partners post match.

Video on Rock vs. Cena.

Snooki is here.

Ryback vs. Mark Henry

They stare each other down before colliding. No one goes anywhere so they do it again to the same result. They slug it out with Ryback taking over. Some clotheslines stagger Henry a bit but Henry runs Ryback over with a single clothesline of his own. A powerslam gets one for Mark but Ryback fights back with some right hands. A suplex is blocked by Henry and he puts Ryback on the apron with ease. Henry sends him into the post and clotheslines him out to the floor for good measure.

Back in and Henry pounds away on the back even more to take away the power game from Ryback. We hit an old school bearhug for a bit before Henry throws him to the floor again. Ryback gets back in at nine and it’s back to the bearhug. The bald one finally fights out of it and hits some shoulders to the ribs in the corner and there’s the Meat Hook. Ryback loads up the Shell Shock but Henry grabs the top rope and falls onto Ryback’s back for the pin at 8:06.

Rating: D. What in the world was that? Henry DESTROYED Ryback here and beat him almost clean in eight minutes. I don’t think there was an injury or anything, but why in the world would you have Ryback lose here? This keeps his long losing streak going for what, eight months now? I don’t get this one at all.

Post match Ryback hits the spinebuster and Shell Shock on Henry. So why did we have the match end that way???

The announcers play with toys and announce a partnership with the Special Olympics.

Some Special Olympians are here with Stephanie McMahon and Governor Christie.

Tag Titles: Big E. Langston/Dolph Ziggler vs. HELL NO

HELL NO is defending. This was set up by Ziggler beating Kane and Bryan in singles matches and wanting a title match as a result. This is also Langston’s debut. We get a funny bit to start with Ziggler kissing AJ to taunt Bryan and getting kicked in the head for a VERY close two ala last year. Ziggler bails to the floor and gets caught with a suicide dive. Back in and Bryan fires off the hard kicks to the chest but the big one to the head misses.

Ziggler dives off to tag in Langston and he gets Kane. Big E. easily catches a charging Kane and hits three straight backbreakers to take over. Kane gets a boot up in the corner to stop a charging Langston but the chokeslam is easily broken up. Langston runs over Kane and it’s back to Ziggler for some quick choking. Langston comes in again for more shots to Kane’s chest and ribs. He lowers his head though and there’s a DDT from Kane to put Langston down.

Back to Dolph who breaks up a tag to Bryan, only to miss a splash in the corner. Kane’s side slam gets two but the top rope clothesline misses. The Fameasser kind of misses but Bryan comes in for the save anyway. Ziggler jumps into an uppercut from Kane but Langston splashes Kane for the save at two. The Big Ending is broken up and Kane sends Big E. to the floor for the knee from Bryan. The Zig Zag gets two on Kane and Dolph is frustrated. AJ slides in the briefcase but Kane ducks Ziggler’s swing. The chokeslam connects and Kane takes out Langston. The Swan Dive from Bryan retains the titles at 6:30.

Rating: C. My predictions are taking a pounding tonight. I would assume this means Ziggler cashes in tonight, because we should totally buy him as world champion after he loses to Bryan here right? The match was fine, but at this point there’s no need to see HELL NO with the belts anymore. It’s just dull at this point and they stopped being funny a long time ago.

John Cena talks about Make-A-Wish.

Fandango vs. Chris Jericho

Fandango has a troop of dancing girls this time. This is set up because Jericho can’t pronounce Fandango’s name properly. This is also Fandango’s debut. Fandango dances to start and is taken down by Jericho very quickly. The dancer heads to the floor but as soon as he heads back in, Jericho takes him down and pounds away even more. Fandango jumps over Jericho in the corner but walks into a Codebreaker to send him to the floor. A baseball slide sends Fandango to the floor and Jericho hits a big plancha to take him down.

Back in and Jericho wipes the dust off his hands but as he loads up the springboard dropkick, Fandango blasts him in the face with a hard kick. Off to a chinlock as JBL goes off on Fandango for posing too much. Chris fights up pretty quickly and speeds things up before hitting a top rope ax handle. A Thesz Press puts Fandango down as does an enziguri for two. A top rope cross body gets two for Jericho but he gets sent shoulder first into the post to stop his momentum again.

A Downward Spiral puts Jericho down and the guillotine legdrop hits….for two. The Walls are countered and Fandango clotheslines Jericho down. Another guillotine legdrop is broken up but so is Jericho’s superplex bid. The third legdrop attempt misses but the Lionsault misses as well. Jericho tries the Walls but looks to have tweaked his knee. Fandango gets a sloppy small package for the pin at 9:16.

Rating: D. This was REALLY sloppy at the end and it appeared to be botched. Fandango did nothing to impress me here as he only seems to have one big move in the legdrop and that was tried three times in less than ten minutes. That ending looked awkward though so I’m guessing something went wrong.

We look at Miz winning the Intercontinental Title on the pre-show.

Video on Rock being back and various cities his fans come from.

We get a highlight package of Mania moments set to Rocky music on the big screens with all the other lights off. The lights come back up to reveal….Diddy, for the annual music medley.

We recap Swagger vs. Del Rio. Swagger and his manager Zeb Colter don’t like people coming into their country and taking jobs from “people that look like them”. The world champion, Alberto Del Rio, is one of these people. Swagger won the Elimination Chamber match and earned this shot. To make it personal, Swagger broke Alberto’s friend Ricardo Rodriguez’s ankle. The idea is that Del Rio is the kind of immigrant that America was built on, but the fans aren’t really buying him in this role for the most part.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger’s entrance is cut off as he and Colter are in the ring after the video package. Colter goes on his usual rant about how awful New York is because of all the non-English languages being spoken. Apparently those foreigners are plotting something. Swagger pounds away to start but Del Rio sends him to the floor for a baseball slide. Alberto pounds on Jack on the floor for a bit before heading inside again. Colter starts distracting the champion immediately and Jack takes over.

A hard clothesline gets two for Swagger and it’s off to an armbar, which Del Rio rolls up for two. Swagger comes back with the Vader Bomb for two but as he tries to wrap the champion’s legs around the post, Alberto pulls Jack’s shoulder into the post. Back in and Swagger charges into a boot to the face and there are some clotheslines from the champion. Both Swagger and Colter get kicked in the face with the actual wrestler getting covered for two as a result.

The armbreaker is countered and Swagger hits a high belly to belly suplex for two. Jack goes after the leg but the Patriot Lock is quickly broken up. The Vader Bomb is broken up as well and Del Rio hits the ten forearms to the back followed by the Backstabber for two. The champion hits a hard German suplex for two but the armbreaker is countered into the gutwrench powerbomb for two.

There’s another Patriot Lock but as Swagger tries the grapevine, Del Rio slides over into the armbreaker in a sweet counter. Jack powers out of that into the Patriot Lock again but Alberto makes the rope. Another gutwrench powerbomb is countered and Del Rio fires off a kick to the head, only to hurt his ankle even more.

The corner enziguri hits Swagger but Colter puts the foot on the ropes at two. Ricardo goes after Zeb but gets kicked in the ankle. Del Rio and Colter both have a crutch but the distraction lets Swagger deck Alberto. They head back in and there’s the cross armbreaker out of nowhere for the tap out at 10:37. It was as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: C+. That ending came out of nowhere and cut short what was looking to be a good match. Thankfully they kept this a mat based match which is where both of these guys shine. The counters were pretty sweet out there and both guys looked good, but at the end of the day that ending stopped this dead in its tracks, which is a shame.

The National Guard is here.

We recap Punk vs. Undertaker, which is built around the idea of Punk disrespecting the memory of the recently dead Paul Bearer. Punk wants to be the 1 in 20-1, meaning he wants to break the Streak. He stole the urn as well, because that hasn’t been done in about ten years or so.

Undertaker vs. CM Punk

Living Colour plays Punk to the ring live. Heyman and Punk throw the urn around before the match. Punk slaps Taker in the corner to try to tick him off before pounding away back inside. Undertaker launches Punk into the corner but Punk slaps him again. The chokeslam is blocked by a high kick but Taker kicks him in the face to counter. We head to the floor and Taker keeps pounding away before loading up the announce table.

Punk is rammed spine first into the post and there’s the apron legdrop for good measure. Back inside and Taker gets some more open shots in the corner. Old School is broken up and Punk stomps away in the corner. In a solidly evil move, Punk hits Old School of his own followed by a Russian legsweep for two. Off to a kind of keylock by Punk which is easily broken up. Taker slugs him down but misses a running big boot into the corner.

A baseball slide puts Taker on the floor and there’s a Macho ax handle to keep the Dead Man down. Back in and Punk works on the shoulder with some Scott Hall driving shoulder blocks. Taker fires off some right hands but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker for two. Heyman shouts that Punk is getting closer and it’s off to a chinlock. A suplex eventually gets Taker out of trouble but Punk tries Old School again. That’s just asking for trouble though and Punk crotches himself on the top rope. Heyman: “WHAT HAPPENED?”

Taker loads up the Dive but Heyman makes the save. Instead of a chokeslam to Heyman though, it’s a springboard clothesline by Punk for two. The running knee in the corner connects and there’s the Macho Elbow for two more. Punk draws power from the urn and calls for Go to Sleep but Taker counters into the chokeslam for two. Back up and Undertaker wins a quick slugfest before pounding Punk down into the corner. Snake Eyes connects but Punk leg lariats him down for two.

A clothesline sends Taker to the floor and now Punk finishes loading up the announce table. Taker tries a Last Ride through the table but Punk escapes and high kicks Taker onto the table instead. The Macho Elbow…..doesn’t put Undertaker through the table as Punk just kind of stops moving once he hits Undertaker. Both guys are down and Punk is holding his knee back in the ring. The referee gets to nine but Taker dives back in just in time.

Back in and Taker tries Hell’s Gate but can’t get it all the way in. Punk tries to flip over but only gets two as a result. There’s the Anaconda Vice (no mention of Punk beating Taker in a submission match back in 2009) and Taker sits up. He glares at Punk while still in the hold and slips his hand underneath, but the chokeslam is countered into a bad GTS. Taker doesn’t even go off his feet and picks Punk up for the Tombstone for two.

They slug it out again and Taker loads up the chokeslam, only to have Punk shove the referee down. Punk’s knee is giving out but he hits the running knee in the corner only to be countered into the Last Ride. Heyman throws in the urn to blast Taker in the head ala HHH and the sledgehammer in 2001. Naturally it only gets two because Undertaker doesn’t lose at Wrestlemania. Taker escapes the GTS twice and the second Tombstone makes it 21-0 at 22:23.

Rating: B. It was good but I never once bought the Streak as being in jeopardy. It wasn’t going to end in a countout, it wasn’t going to end off a GTS, it wasn’t going to end with the same spot that HHH did better 12 years ago. It’s a good match but it’s a step down from the last four years. To be fair though, did anyone really think it was ending here? I’m not sure why you would. It’s Undertaker at Wrestlemania for crying out loud. The match was entertaining though and Punk’s visuals were great throughout, as was him hitting Old School. Good but definitely not great match here.

Undertaker reclaims the urn and looks like he’s about to cry.

WWE has donated a lot of Slim Jims to the military.

Video on Cena being focused for the main event.

We recap HHH vs. Brock Lesnar using the same video we’ve seen about five times now. HHH didn’t have a reason to get back into the ring until Lesnar hurt Vince. It’s No Holds Barred with HHH’s career on the line.

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Shawn Michaels is in HHH’s corner. Lesnar is in the MMA gear which makes him look even scarier than usual. They slug it out to start with HHH firing off a bunch of right hands to the ribs. Lesnar knees the Game in the ribs and out to the floor we go. Brock is sent into the barricade and the announce table but Brock sends him into the apron to take over. They head into the crowd but HHH immediately clotheslines Lesnar back to ringside.

Brock blasts him in the head and picks up a chair as we head back inside. The jumping knee to the face puts Brock back down and Heyman steals the chair away before HHH can use it. They head back to the floor and Lesnar hits a belly to belly suplex to send HHH onto the floor. A release vertical suplex puts HHH through the table and Brock screams at HHH’s body. There’s another belly to belly suplex onto the remnants of the table and Brock gives us another evil grin.

Shawn tries to check on Brock and is sent running away. Back inside and Brock pounds away into the corner and shrugs off a facebuster before clotheslining HHH down for two. Another belly to belly gets another two as Shawn plays cheerleader. A pair of German suplexes get three two counts and Brock shouts a lot. HHH fires back some right hands but gets whipped over the corner and back out to the floor.

HHH’s arm is hanging there at the moment but he comes back with a clothesline and a right hand. Another clothesline puts Lesnar into the timekeeper’s area. A chair shot staggers Brock but we head back inside for a bridging German for two. Brock decks Shawn off the apron but walks into a spinebuster. The Pedigree is countered but so is the F5. Shawn comes in to try a superkick but gets caught in the F5 instead.

A bad looking Pedigree gets two on Brock and it’s sledgehammer time. Brock puts HHH up in mid swing and hits the F5 for two. We head to the floor and Brock cracks a chair over the Game’s back before sending him into the steps. The same steps go upside HHH’s head and Brock sends the other set into the ring. Back inside and Brock hits him in the arm with the steps for two more. Another shot with the steps gets another two but HHH comes back with some right hands. The Pedigree is countered into the Kimura arm lock but the ropes do nothing here.

Triple H breaks the hold twice by ramming Brock into the corner but Lesnar puts it on again. Brock fires off some knees and puts the hold on while on the middle rope but HHH picks him up and slams him down in a spinebuster. Brock misses a charge into the post and there’s a low blow for good measure. HHH wraps Brock’s arm around the post and Brock sounds like he in labor. A chair shot crushes the arm against the post and HHH does the same against the steps for good measure.

HHH throws on a Kimura of his own and Brock screams for Heyman, only to have Shawn superkick Heyman down. Brock holds off from tapping and lifts HHH into the air before slamming him down onto the steps. HHH throws the hold right back on and Brock slams him down onto the steps again to break the hold a second time. Here’s a third Kimura by HHH and Brock lifts him up, only to be DDTed onto the steps. It’s sledgehammer time again and a shot to Brock’s head sets up a Pedigree onto the steps for the pin at 24:00.

Rating: B+. This started slow but the ending was much better. I was actually thinking Brock would tap at the end and they had me not sure of who was going to win until the end. I’ll have a lot more to say about HHH spending eleven months with Brock Lesnar and then beating him in the blowoff match at Wrestlemania, but for now this was a good, hard hitting, entertaining match.

We get the Hall of Fame video from last night.

The Class of 2013 is presented to the arena: Mick Foley, Booker T, Trish Stratus, Bob Backlund, Donald Trump (booed) and Bruno Sammartino (gets a trumpet entrance). Foley got the loudest ovation it seemed.

The attendance record is 80,676.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. The Rock

No entrance video, no musical performance, no special Mania entrance, nothing. Cena just walks out and kind of struts down the ramp at first. Apparently the eight person tag was cut from the show. I didn’t think they could fit all of that into the amount of time they had left. We get Big Match Intros and we’re ready to go. The crowd is exactly as you would expect it to be. Rock is champion and the huge crowd favorite if that wasn’t clear.

A quick shoulder block gets no one anywhere so we stare each other down a bit more. Rock grabs a headlock which does nothing of note either. We try it again until they run the ropes a few times followed by a hip toss to send Cena to the floor. Back in and Cena sends Rock into the corner before pounding away a bit. The champion comes back with a clothesline and a kick to the face to put Cena down on the mat.

Rock drives some elbows into Cena’s chest but gets clotheslined down again. The crowd isn’t into this for the most part. Cena hooks a chinlock which transitions into a headlock on the mat. Rock fights up and hooks a sleeper as the fans think this is boring. A suplex puts Rock down and Cena stomps away as he continues to be the heel in the match. Rock fights back with a Samoan drop and they lay around a bit more. Cena’s release fisherman’s suplex gets two.

Rock tries the spit punches but Cena hits the shoulder. A second one misses and the spit punch connects. The spinebuster is countered into an STF attempt but Rock escapes. Cena hits his finishing sequence but the ProtoBomb is countered into the Sharpshooter, and it’s WAY better than the one he used last year. Cena rolls out of that and kicks Rock off so he can hit the ProtoBomb.

The Shuffle misses (I don’t remember that happening before actually, which is hard to believe) and Rock hits a DDT to take Cena down. The Rock Bottom is countered into a bad Crossface but when that gets Cena nowhere, he hits a third ProtoBomb and the Shuffle for no cover. The AA is countered but there’s the spinebuster by Rock. Cena picks the leg to counter the Elbow though and the STF goes on. In an impressive power display, Rock rolls onto his back and breaks Cena’s grip to escape.

Cena charges into the Rock Bottom for two as the fans are barely reacting to these near falls because we’re not even fifteen minutes into this yet. The AA hits for two but the to rope Fameasser misses. Now the People’s Elbow hits but of course it only gets two. The near falls aren’t even close as Cena is kicking out at like two and a quarter instead of two and nine tenths.

After Cena rolls to the floor for a bit they head back inside for the boo/yay slugout. Rock for some reason tries a cross body and it’s ANGRY Cena but he gets countered into a big Rock Bottom. AGAIN Cena kicks out barely after two which takes away a lot of the drama. Rock stops to listen to the people and loads up another Elbow, only to throw in You Can’t See Me. In a nice callback to last year, Cena pops up and hits the AA for two.

Back up and they slug it out again and Cena hits a Rock Bottom of his own for two. NOW the fans are getting into this. Cena has no idea what to do now but as he loads up the Shuffle, he stops and sets up the Elbow. This is what cost him last year but he holds the ropes when Rock nips up, only to have the AA countered into a Rock Bottom for another two. This is starting to pick up a lot.

The AA is countered, the Rock Bottom is countered, the AA is countered again, the Rock Bottom is countered again, the AA is countered again, Rock hits a DDT. The champion tries about the nineteenth Rock Bottom of the match but gets countered into the Attitude Adjustment to give Cena his 14^th world title at 24:00. Yeah seriously, that’s it.

Rating: C+. This started off REAL slow but picked up after about twenty minutes. The problem is it stopped as soon as they started to get going. This fell into the classic trap of trying to have an epic match and collapsing under the weight. The problem at the end of the day is we’ve seen this done better before, so what’s the appeal here? Not much to see here and it was freaking boring at times.

They say something we can hear to each other and shake hands….and Rock walks out to his own music to end the show. Oh wait they salute each other and pose to really end it.

Overall Rating: B-. This falls into that awkward “Good but not memorable” category. The big matches were all good but nothing on here was what I would call a masterpiece. Rock vs. Cena was good but we saw a better and bigger match last year between the two. The crowd didn’t help things, which ranges from either the cold or reports of REALLY obstructed views for a lot of them.

The biggest problem here is there was never that moment that you remember from each show until the end. Yeah that helps a lot, but it doesn’t help when we’ve seen Cena win the title what, twelve times before? It also doesn’t help that the moment comes after FIVE HOURS of WWE tonight.

Results

Shield b. Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus – Spear to Orton

Mark Henry b. Ryback – Henry fell on Ryback’s back

HELL NO b. Dolph Ziggler/Big E. Langston – Swan Dive to Ziggler

Fandango b. Chris Jericho – Small Package

Alberto Del Rio b. Jack Swagger – Cross Armbreaker

Undertaker b. CM Punk – Tombstone

HHH b. Brock Lesnar – Pedigree on the steps

John Cena b. The Rock – Attitude Adjustment

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Fusion #51
Date: March 30, 2019
Location: Cicero Stadium, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Jim Cornette, Rich Bocchini

It’s the last show in Chicago before we head up to New York for Battle Riot. The problem is this show doesn’t really do much to build towards its specials, meaning it’s not going to be much more than a regular episode. That’s not the worst thing in the world though and this week will feature Teddy’s Hart’s open challenge for the Middleweight Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Salina de la Renta sends El Hijo de LA Park somewhere to give someone whatever he wants for an advantage in Battle Riot.

Opening sequence.

We open with a preview of Battle Riot, a two hour special.

Recap of Teddy Hart getting arrested and Dynasty destroying Brian Pillman Jr. last week.

Ariel Dominguez vs. Daga

Low Ki is on commentary due to ripping off Daga’s ear a few months back. The fans are behind Daga as the much smaller Ariel spins out of a wristlock. A headlock works a bit better for Daga and a dropkick puts Dominguez down, getting the fans right back into it. Some running forearms keep Daga in control and the announcers talk about Konnan. Dominguez gets thrown into the air for a big crash to the mat and a running kick to the face gets two.

Dominguez finally gets in a pair of elbows to the face and a springboard tornado DDT gets a delayed two (Low Ki: “COVER HIM! COVER HIM!”). Daga gets sent outside for a dive, with Dominguez barely being able to take him down. Back in and Daga gets some knees up, followed by a right hand to the face to really take over again. A heck of a release German suplex drops Dominguez again and a single arm implant DDT gives Daga the pin at 7:49.

Rating: C-. Dominguez has a lot of fire but he’s small enough that it’s really hard to believe that he could actually pull something like this off. Daga is a bigger star both figuratively and literally, making this feel longer than it needed to. Low Ki vs. Daga should be fine for a hard hitting brawl, and listening to Low Ki is far more fun than it should be.

Post match referees have to break up Daga and Low Ki.

Last week Salina and LA Park’s victory interview was interrupted by Mance Warner, who was beaten down for his efforts.

Myron Reed has accepted the open challenge for the Middleweight Title because he wants a chance. Reed gets straight to the point: he’s taking the belt and heating up Major League Wrestling.

The Hart Foundation isn’t happy with the Dynasty and Teddy promises to throw them into a furnace like coal to keep the fire going.

Ricky Martinez vs. Air Wolf

This is Air Wolf’s (a masked 19 year old from Minneapolis) debut. An early hurricanrana has Martinez in trouble and a springboard dropkick sends him outside. There’s a good looking no hands dive and a Salina distraction doesn’t work, allowing Wolf to kick him in the head. He tries to get just a bit too high flying though and Martinez takes him off the barricade, setting up the Madison Rayne faceplants back inside.

Martinez hits an old Bobo Brazil kick to the head, followed by the Tully Blanchard slingshot suplex and you know Cornette is right there with the historical names. A neckbreaker gets two but Wolf is back with a series of kicks and a 619 over the bottom rope. Wolf’s slingshot DDT is more of a slingshot armdrag though Martinez looks a little dead. Back up and Wolf gets caught on top, allowing Martinez to hit a pop up knee for the pin at 6:26.

Rating: D+. Wolf had some nice stuff but he never really popped in a way that made me care about him. That being said, at 19 years old he’s in need of a lot more ring time so the extra polish is going to help him a lot. Martinez is still very good as a midcard heel like this and he’s a perfect fit as Salina’s muscle.

Recap of Contra’s attacks.

Dynasty is happy with destroying the Hart Foundation (though MJF isn’t happy with Hammerstone’s arm around his shoulder) because they were all frauds. Pillman’s necklace shattered last week because it was cheap, but diamonds like them are forever. They’re going to win Battle Riot.

Battle Riot Control Center with WXW’s Avalanche Robert Dreissker, Jimmy Yuta, Rey Horus, Kotta Brazil, Ricky Martinez, Lance Anoa’i, Myron Reed, Richard Hollday, Rich Swann, Jordan Oliver, Leo Brien, Michael Patrick and Dan Severn, among all the other previously announced names. That’s looking pretty good, though I still feel bad about the destruction of the Dirty Blondes.

Tom Lawlor isn’t sure what to make of Jimmy Havoc but he wants revenge for Havoc being the last man to defeat him. Havoc might as well check into the hospital right now because Lawlor is putting him down and he’s staying there.

Daga wants a rematch with Low Ki and he’s going to kill him.

Salina is on the phone with whomever she sent El Hijo de LA Park to help but Hijo isn’t there yet. LA Park says he’s got this.

Middleweight Title: Teddy Hart vs. Myron Reed

Reed is challenging and Hart is still banged up with bad ribs. We hit the posing on the ropes and Reed bails to the floor as the early stalling continues. They finally lock up over a minute in and Hart grabs the arm to put Reed in trouble. A shoulder drops Reed again but it’s a nipup in short order. Hart goes with the strength in the form of a snap powerslam, which bangs up his own ribs even worse.

Project Ciampa makes it even worse on Reed, though again with the same problem for Hart. The Arabian Press gets two but Reed finally gets smart by going after the heavily taped ribs. Sometimes just kicking a guy in the bandages over and over is the best strategy. Hart can’t come back with a German suplex so Reed hits him in the ribs to keep control. A Codebreaker gives Reed two more and Hart gets thrown outside, followed by a whip into the barricade.

Back in and a top rope splash gets two but Reed spends too much time yelling at the referee and gets taken down for an armbar. The ribs flare up again though and Hart has to let go, instead heading up top. That’s delayed as well and it’s a dropkick into a super hurricanrana for two. Reed walks into something like a hammerlock fisherman’s DDT but the Lionsault hits knees. The kickout means another argument with the referee, allowing Hart to grab a backslid of all things for the pin to retain at 10:59.

Rating: C+. There was a story here and the injury was the only way to make you believe that Reed had a chance. Hart and the Hart Foundation are one of the hottest acts in the company and it’s a good idea to have him overcoming the odds here. It was almost nothing but waiting around until the ending with Hart winning, and really that’s just fine.

Hijo returns…and punches his father in the face, because it’s Mance Warner under the mask. A beatdown of Park ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was all it needed to be with a completely watchable show in the vein of a good Ring of Honor episode. They didn’t do much for Battle Riot but that’s the kind of show where one match is going to be more than enough to make the card work. Now just do that show right and we can get on to the stuff they’ve been setting up over the last few weeks.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

WWE was the focus of Last Week Tonight…and it didn’t go that well.

It’s mainly about the business practices in regards to how WWE treats its employees, which has never been the best. Oliver talks about the lack of healthcare or an offseason, which have been problems for years. While there are some context issues (some of the clips are 15-20 years old), he does a good job of not being ridiculous and does point out some of the good things that WWE has done. The main thing though is that Oliver wants the fans to chant/bring signs about this to Wrestlemania, which isn’t out of the question. There isn’t a lot that hardcore fans won’t know, but it’s worth seeing from an outsider perspective and Oliver is rather good at this kind of thing.

 

Wrestlemania XXVIII
Date: April 1, 2012
Location: Sun Life Stadium, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 78,363
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

As big as HHH vs. Undertaker is, everything pales in comparison to Rock vs. Cena. This was the biggest match since Rock vs. Austin’s heyday and the money it brought in more than validated an entire year spent setting everything up. There’s no way the match isn’t going to be great and everyone was ready to see it. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Primo/Epico vs. Tyson Kidd/Justin Gabriel

Primo and Epico (Carlito and Primo’s cousin) are defending and this is one fall to a finish. Primo, Jey and Kidd start things off and you have to tag your partner. Kidd sends Primo to the floor and jumps into a rollup for two. The champs start stomping Tyson gets caught in a DDT for two more. Primo loads up a superplex on Jey but Kidd springboards up to make it a Tower of Doom in a cool spot.

Jimmy and Epico get hot tags and everything breaks down. Jey throws Gabriel up for a Samoan drop but Justin kicks out. Epico gets backdropped over the top and out onto Primo, setting up a dive from Jey. Gabriel moonsaults out onto all three of them, leaving only Jimmy on his feet. Jimmy throws Gabriel back in for a cover, only to have Epico come in for a Backstabber to Jimmy for the pin at 5:11.

Rating: C. Fun tag match here and much better than most of the pre-show matches in recent years. Epico and Primo certainly weren’t great champions by any stretch but there were far worse options out there. This wasn’t meant to revitalize the division or anything but it was very suitable for a quick match to fire the crowd up.

Lillian Garcia sings America the Beautiful. The show is outside again and the stadium looks amazing.

The opening video shows the paths that Cena and Rock took to get here in a really nice concept. We also see the montage of Wrestlemania moments before focusing on HHH vs. Undertaker as the last of a generation. Just like two years earlier, they’re making no secret of the fact that this is a two match card.

World Heavyweight Championship: Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Notice that the Raw and Smackdown names have been dropped as the Brand Split officially ended in August 2011. Sheamus is challenging after winning the 2012 Royal Rumble and choosing to fight Bryan, who won the title by cashing in a Money in the Bank contract at Tables, Ladders and Chairs 2011. Bryan also has his girlfriend AJ Lee with him. The bell rings, Bryan kisses AJ, and it’s a Brogue Kick to give us a new champion at 18 seconds. That fall would haunt Bryan for over a year and indirectly lead to his rise up the card which we’ll get to later.

Team Johnny (as in John Laurinitis, one of McMahon’s longtime yes men) is ready for the ten man tag later tonight. Miz tries to captain the team but they’re not interested in listening. David Otunga (a wrestling lawyer) introduces Johnny in his white suit. Johnny talks about what a big moment this is going to be, just like Austin not submitting and Hogan slamming Andre. There’s no punchline or anything here and it’s just building up the match later. It’s Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy with the winning GM controlling both shows.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Kane is upset that he shook Randy’s hand last year after a street fight and needs to become a monster again. Cole explained that as Kane made his entrance and it was simple, to the point, and told you everything you need to know. Why is that so hard the rest of the year? The fans chant for Bryan as the sun is starting to set.

Orton pounds him down to start and loads up the elevated DDT (which Cole calls a bulldog), only to get draped over the top rope. A big boot to the face sets up a chinlock as the match slows down a bit. Kane’s side slam gets two more and we hear a weak BORING chant. Orton gets taken down in a vertical suplex and Kane puts on his third chinlock of the match. They get back up and Orton hooks his backbreaker, followed by the elevated DDT (AGAIN called a bulldog by Cole).

It’s Kane up first though and he tries the top rope clothesline, only to dive into the dropkick. The Punt is countered into a chokeslam for two (Do they really need to have finishers kicked out of so often? This is a midcard match, not a main event.) so Kane heads up top. Orton breaks it up and tries the superplex, only to get countered into a super chokeslam to give Kane the pin at 10:57.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad and it’s nice to see Orton lose a match after getting dominated and not just nail a quick RKO for the pin. You can tell this is designed to set up a bunch of rematches, which is part of the problem with Wrestlemania: it should be the big ending to a feud, not the start of one. I liked this more the first time around but the chinlocks really hold it back on another viewing.

Santino Marella talks to a cast member from Deadliest Catch and Mick Foley is there eating crabs while talking like a pirate. Mr. Socko and the Cobra make cameo appearances and destroy the crabs until Ron Simmons comes in for his catchphrase.

Intercontinental Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Show is challenging but more importantly he’s in search of his Wrestlemania moment. Cody had made fun of him for weeks over being a joke at Wrestlemania because in this universe, Wrestlemania XVI where Big Show was in the main event doesn’t exist. Yeah he lost quick but how many main events has Cody been in? Cole makes it even worse by saying Show has won some tag matches but was never involved in the pinfall victory. I guess that quick match last year doesn’t count either.

Cody gets Show to chase him to start but dives into Show’s arms, meaning it’s time for the beating to begin. There are the loud chops in the corner and Show adds a Stinkface to make up for some of the humiliation. Cody comes back with a series of dropkicks, including one to the leg for a smart move.

Show gets his leg cranked as Cole says he isn’t as big when he’s on the mat. As usual, this is inaccurate. Actually Show is the same size but he can’t use it to his advantage. I know it’s stupid but that always gets on my nerves. Show fights up and the Disaster Kick doesn’t even knock him down. Cody tries another but gets “speared” (more like a shoulder block which went very low), followed by the WMD (KO Punch) for the pin and the title at 5:20.

Rating: D. So Big Show has the title now, but I guess the whole Wrestlemania moment is the real prize. It’s not like the title had meant anything in years anyway so that makes as much sense as anything else. It makes more sense than saying being in the main event of a Wrestlemania doesn’t count as a major moment at least.

Video on what it means to be a WWE Diva, which seems to translate to wearing very little clothing and dancing a lot.

We recap the Divas tag match. Kelly Kelly had been a guest on Maria Menunos’ (a good looking TV host) Extra when Eve Torres and Beth Phoenix came in and said they should be interviewed. The solution was a tag match of course.

Maria Menunos/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

Beth is Divas Champion (and has wings on her head for no apparent reason) while Maria has cracked ribs and stress fractures in her feet. A quick rollup gets two for Kelly but her cartwheel into an elbow hits feet to the legs. Eve’s moonsault is broken up and Maria comes in for a double Stinkface. Off to a bodyscissors on Maria until Beth comes in for a bearhug from the side.

Eve tries another dancing moonsault but gets kicked out to the floor, allowing for the tag off to Kelly. The screaming headscissors puts Beth down and a top rope seated senton gets two. Beth’s Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog (actually a bulldog this time) and the tag is made to the still injured Maria. Kelly saves her from getting slammed and Maria rolls Beth up for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: D+. I know Kelly is supposed to be this big deal but her theme song is still about hollering in a club to a hot beat. Then you have the Divas Champion lose to a celebrity, who to be fair was clearly trying. The match could have been worse but the division was just dying at this point and this was great proof. Watchable match, horrible ending. You really can’t have Eve get pinned here? Really? Also: only Maria would be involved with the next Wrestlemania.

Shawn Michaels says this next match will be the end of an era. It’s ironic that he gets to decide which era that will be.

The attendance record is announced.

Jim Ross, now with a goatee, comes out to do commentary.

There’s no recap for the Cell match (if you were watching the show you probably knew the story already) but as I said it’s the final chapter in the story between these three men. HHH wanted one more shot at the Streak (though the way he talked you would think he already broke it) and Undertaker agreed if it was inside the Cell. Shawn is guest referee to add some more drama.

Undertaker vs. HHH

Inside Hell in a Cell with Shawn as guest referee. Shawn takes a quick lap around the stage before coming to the ring. HHH comes out through a miniature set designed like a war helmet and shoulder pads. Undertaker’s hair now now shaved into a mohawk with the first reveal coming here, much to the crowd’s shock. The Cell is lowered to The Memory Remains by Metallica, allowing JR to talk about how the Cell is morally corrupt.

Undertaker slugs him down to start (with carcinogenic right hands according to JR) and HHH can’t hang in a fist fight. They head outside instead with Undertaker backdropping him onto the floor. The announcers talk about how this is the end of an era and we’ll never return to it. Undertaker sends him into the cage as Cole’s latest stat is HHH winning every match in which Shawn is a guest referee. So he’s what: 2 or 3-0?

Back in and the facebuster has no effect on Undertaker and it’s Old School putting HHH down again. The steps off HHH’s head surprisingly don’t draw blood. The apron legdrop keeps HHH in trouble before we get to the real violence. HHH finally gets in a DDT for a breather but the Pedigree onto the steps is quickly broken up. The spinebuster onto the steps works a lot better and Undertaker is in trouble.

HHH walks right into Hell’s Gate from the steps so he lifts Undertaker up (JR: “Sinful strength by HHH!”) into a powerbomb onto the mat for the save. The steps are sent to the floor and it’s time for the chair shots to Undertaker’s back. Shawn tries to pull HHH off but JR accurately says that there are no rules (unfortunately with no strange word choices). Michaels tries to talk Undertaker into quitting (out of sympathy, not cheating) but Undertaker demands that it not be stopped.

That earns him a chair to the ribs and the back for a pretty slow two count. HHH goes to get more weapons and tells Shawn to end it before he does. That means sledgehammer time but Undertaker says keep it going. There’s a sledgehammer shot to the face for two (we’re getting close to that ridiculous point). Shawn breaks up another one to the back of the head to avoid being a murder witness and thinks about calling the match to save Undertaker.

You don’t threaten the Undertaker though so he chokes Shawn out to break it up. That earns him another sledgehammer to the head but there’s no referee. Undertaker is still able to kick HHH low, despite probably having about 18 concussions at once. The Hell’s Gate has HHH in trouble and here’s another referee to take Shawn’s place. A chokeslam gets two so Undertaker chokeslams the new referee (barely getting him above shoulder high).

Shawn gets back up and superkicks Undertaker into the Pedigree for maybe the hottest near fall of all time, sending Shawn nearly into tears in the corner. I totally and completely bought that it was over on that cover. HHH gets the sledgehammer and throws an intervening Shawn to the floor…..and Undertaker sits up with that look in his eye. You can take your Brock Lesnar, your old school Vader, your Mankind and your Mr. McMahon at his craziest. For me, ticked off Undertaker is the scariest thing in wrestling.

The big boot and Snake Eyes set up a Tombstone for a very close two and Undertaker’s adrenaline comes to a sudden stop. They slug it out from their knees and then their feet until a quick Pedigree gets two. Shawn is still on the verge of tears. Undertaker sits up again but falls when he tries to get to his feet. HHH gets the sledgehammer again but Undertaker steps on it before unloading on HHH with a chair.

The chair is bent over HHH’s back and now Shawn has to try to stop Undertaker. All those shots are only good for two and Shawn begs HHH to stop. HHH tries to get the sledgehammer back up but Undertaker easily blocks a swing. Barely able to stand in the corner, HHH fires off a crotch chop as Shawn turns his head. A sledgehammer to the head means it’s time for the straps to come down and the Tombstone finally ends HHH at 30:54.

Rating: A+. What a ride. Those are the first words to come to my head after seeing this again because that went from one end of the roller coaster to another with every kind of emotion you could find in the middle. This is one of the best stories ever told in a match and a perfect way to conclude a four year saga between these three men. I’m glad the Streak didn’t end here, but that superkick into the Pedigree had me ready to believe that it was over. This is an absolute masterpiece and the definition of wrestling as art. There’s nothing left for these three to do and they left it all in the ring. See this if you haven’t before.

Shawn has to pull Undertaker up as HHH is still unconscious. They eventually help HHH out and get him up the ramp where they all hug to truly end this in a show of respect. That’s what the entire story was based on, even if they went to war for years. It was never a war based on hatred and it’s very good that they showcased that at the end.

We get the Hall of Fame video from last night with the Four Horsemen being inducted as a team so Flair could be put in twice. This wound up biting them though as Flair was officially still under contract to TNA so WWE had to send Christian to Slammiversary 2012 as compensation (while Christian was still Intercontinental Champion).

Here’s the Class of 2012: Mil Mascaras, Yokozuna (represented by his children), Ron Simmons, the Four Horsemen (Flair, Arn Anderson, JJ Dillon, Tully Blanchard and Barry Windham. I believe it’s just this incarnation and not the group as a whole), Mike Tyson and Edge.

Heath Slater wants to sing a duet with Florida (“That’s Flo Rida.”) but Rida isn’t interested in any sort of partnership. Slater gets beaten up.

Team Teddy vs. Team Johnny

Teddy: Santino Marella, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, Zack Ryder, Great Khali, Booker T.

Johnny: David Otunga, Mark Henry, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, The Miz

The winner’s team gets to run both shows. Johnny has Vickie Guerrero and Brie Bella, Teddy has Hornswoggle, Eve Torres, Brie Bella and Aksana (Teddy’s would-be girlfriend). Ryder is fresh off becoming a grassroots hero who won the US Title, only to lose it all (presumably because he isn’t what WWE wanted as a star, as brilliant an idea as that is). Johnny is in a white suit and red tie, making him look like a thin Colonel Sanders. All of the wrestlers (including Captains Otunga and Marella (US Champion)) are in red or blue shirts.

Kofi and Ziggler start (makes sense as they’ve fought literally about thirty times on TV alone over the years) with Kofi grabbing a headlock and bringing in Truth for a double hiptoss. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and it’s off to Drew as Cole and Lawler bicker over who would be the better GM.

Khali comes in for the big chops before handing it off to Booker (a last minute addition to the team) for two off a side slam. Booker gets in trouble though and it’s time for the face in peril (along with Vickie screaming). Mark comes in and throw Booker into the corner before Miz comes in, much to Cole’s delight. Booker fights out of a chinlock as the discussion turns to Vickie’s looks.

The World’s Strongest Slam drops Booker and everything breaks down. A double flapjack drops Khali but Kofi, Ryder and Truth hit triple flip dives to take out most of Team Johnny. Aksana and Vickie brawl which gets the Bellas into it. The hot tag brings in Santino to clean house, including his saluting top rope headbutt.

There’s the Cobra to Miz (Cole: “Oh my God, oh my God.”) but Ziggler breaks it up at two. Ryder comes in and takes down Miz and Ziggler, including a Rough Ryder (leg lariat) to Dolph. Eve gets in the ring for no apparent reason other than to distract Ryder, allowing Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin on Zack at 10:38.

Rating: D+. Big mess here but that triple dive was really cool looking. This was another step towards Ryder’s complete burial after he ran from Kane, was destroyed by Kane, lost his US Title and lost Eve (the woman of his dreams) a few months ago. It was depressing how bad things got for him and he never recovered. As you probably guessed, this was your annual get everyone on the show match.

Eve kicks Ryder low to make sure you get the idea: don’t cheer for people WWE doesn’t pick.

Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson are here.

Wrestlemania week video.

CM Punk is ready to defend his WWE World Title but Johnny comes up to say the title can change hands on a DQ.

We recap Jericho vs. Punk. Jericho returned again and accused Punk of ripping him off when Punk called himself the best in the world. Punk eliminated him from the Elimination Chamber by knocking Jericho out due to injury without pinning him. Jericho then won a battle royal to earn this shot and started accusing Punk’s family of being a bunch of alcoholics and drug addicts. That’s too much for Punk and now he’s out for blood.

WWE World Title: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Punk is defending if that wasn’t clear and he can lose the title on a DQ, just in case they didn’t hammer the idea in well enough at Wrestlemania XXV. The champ takes it to the mat to start before taking Jericho down again with a knee to the ribs. Jericho gets sent into the corner where he shouts “HOW’S YOUR FATHER” to send Punk over the edge again. Punk beats him down again but the threat of the top rope elbow sends Jericho to the floor.

That’s fine with Punk as he dives onto Jericho, who then asks about Punk’s sister. Punk grabs a chair but opts to kick Jericho in the ribs instead. Just like three years ago, these pauses are killing the flow of the match. A quick dropkick gives Jericho a breather and he suplexes Punk over the top and out to the floor for a big crash. You don’t often see that work. Jericho starts working on the back to set up the Walls with a kick to the spine and a backsplash for two. A double arm crank keeps Punk in trouble until he dropkicks Jericho into the corner.

The running knee in the corner sets up the bulldog but Jericho slams him down instead. Punk has to counter the Walls and gets two off the high kick to the head. The Macho Elbow hits Jericho’s knees though and a Codebreaker puts Punk on the floor. Back in and a GTS out of nowhere gets two (no way a title match ends on the first finisher). Jericho drapes him ribs first over the top rope and the Lionsault gets two. Cole: “Not often you see somebody kick out of the Lionsault.” I don’t remember the last time it pinned someone.

The Walls have Punk in trouble but he makes the ropes as you would expect. A knee to the head staggers Jericho but Punk springboards into another Codebreaker for another two. Punk kicks him down again and tries the GTS (Punk: “BEST IN THE WORLD!”), only to be countered into the Liontamer (kneeling Boston crab) and then the Walls. Punk counters into a small package and then the Anaconda Vice. Jericho counters THAT with knees to the head but can’t hook the Walls again, allowing Punk to hook the Vice (and duck his head this time) for the tap out at 22:20.

Rating: B+. This got so much better once they got away from the stupid DQ stuff (which would be remedied at the next pay per view with an awesome street fight). I really don’t get the thinking behind the DQ idea. I know it’s the evil GM screwing with Punk but it cripples whatever the match could get going. Either let them do the violent stuff that fits the story or just have it be an awesome match like they’re clearly capable of having. This half and half stuff almost never works and this only succeeded because of how good both guys are.

Wrestlemania XXIX is in New Jersey.

Here’s the still mostly new Funkasaurus Brodus Clay to tell us to call our mamas. Brodus calls his own mama and finds out that she’s here, complete with the bridge club. Cue mama and said bridge club (all a bunch of older women (clearly in makeup) and matching dresses) for a massive dance number. This got twelve times the length that Sheamus vs. Bryan had.

Video on G.I. Joe 2, which wasn’t released for over a year due to re-shoots.

After all that, we recap John Cena vs. the Rock. This has been built up for over a year now and both guys have spent so much time heavily insulting each other that it actually is epic, as described by a bunch of legends in the video. Several years back, Cena had been on a radio show where he talked about Rock saying he loved WWE and then leaving. Cena on the other hand was here every single day because this is what he loved more than anything.

This turned into a back and forth war until Rock finally returned over a year ago. This is the match that has been set up by both guys trading huge bombs on the mic with Rock saying Cena wasn’t serious enough and Cena calling Rock out for using wrestling to become an actor. They flat out did not like each other and made that very clear, setting up this match as the biggest in a generation, which it certainly was. The tagline for the match and the show: Once in a Lifetime.

Since we haven’t dragged it out enough, here are Machine Gun Kelly and Skylar Grey to perform the show’s theme song and define the word underdog.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Cena is booed out of Miami the second his music hits. And wait again because here’s Flo Rida to perform two songs and eat up even more time. Of note: he has a bunch of backup dancers, who I’m assuming are the bridge club after a costume change. After that eats up WAY too much time, Rock’s ovation is thunderous. Ignore him having to walk through the posing dancers to look out at the people. They talk trash after the big match intros and we finally get the opening bell, nearly twenty minutes after the video package began.

We get the big lockup and Cena shoves him away. Rock does the same as we’re firmly in Hogan vs. Warrior territory so far. Some quick armdrags and a majistral cradle get two for Rock, sending Cena into the corner with a stunned look on his face. Rock can’t get a Sharpshooter and Cena bails to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Cena takes Rock’s head off with a clothesline for one and we hit a bearhug on the mat. That goes nowhere so they head to the floor with Rock being dropped ribs first over the barricade. Cena stays on them with a belly to belly and now it’s off to a bearhug. Rock fights back with right hands and the spinebuster but Cena grabs the leg for the STF to break up the People’s Elbow. He can’t get the hold on so it’s a ProtoBomb instead, followed by the Shuffle.

Back up and it’s a double clothesline to give us another breather. Another slugout goes to Rock but he tries his own You Can’t See Me and walks into the AA for two. The Rock Bottom gets the same but Cena comes back with a side slam. The top rope Fameasser gets another two and both guys are spent. Something like a spear (it was supposed to be a spinebuster) sets up the Sharpshooter (with Rock pulling back with his hands instead of his arm), only to have Cena quickly make it to the ropes.

Rock sends him hard into the steps to keep Cena in trouble but he grabs the STF (with almost no torque). The hold stays on WAY too long and Rock starts to fade, even drawing an arm check. Rock finally makes the ropes after about two minutes and grabs a Samoan drop to get a breather.

The AA is countered into a spinebuster (Rock might have said “Yabba dabba” on the way down) and the People’s Elbow for a really close near fall. A catapult of all things sends Rock into the buckle (as opposed to a Buick sending him into it), only to have Rock break up a superplex. Rock goes nuts with a high cross body but Cena counters into an AA for two more. With nothing else working, Cena tries his own People’s Elbow but charges into the Rock Bottom for the pin at 30:54.

Rating: A. Just because it’s not quite as good as the Cell. That was the main event of Wrestlemania. What else can you ask for from these two, especially after all this build and the Rock having one match in eight years? This was almost all about the atmosphere coming in and then they had a great match on top of it. It’s one of the best main events ever and certainly one of the biggest, which is exactly what it needed to be.

So did the right guy win? I really don’t think so the more I look at it. Everything that Cena had said over the year was true: win or lose, Rock was going back to Hollywood to star in another blockbuster so why should he win here? It really doesn’t help Cena either as he got beat by a guy who hasn’t wrestled in eight years, though at the same time I don’t want to imagine how bad the reaction would have been if Rock had lost in his hometown. I would have gone with Cena, though I think I can understand their reasons behind going with Rock. Maybe.

Now for the second iconic image of the show: Rock poses on the ropes and Cena sits on the ramp, totally lost.

Overall Rating: B+. This is almost all about the two main events which ate up nearly half the show when you consider buildup and fallout. Those two matches were both home runs and that’s all you need to make this a good show. Jericho vs. Punk is good but not great….and that’s about the extent of the positives on the show. Everything else is just ok at best but again, nearly two hours of great is more than you get on several months of shows most of the time, which easily makes this a very good show.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C-

Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Kelly Kelly/Maria Menunos vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

HHH vs. Undertaker

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: B+

The Rock vs. John Cena

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: B+

The top matches on this card are as good as WWE has done in a long time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/04/01/wrestlemania-xxviii-one-of-the-best-shows-of-all-time/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/06/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxviii-this-show-got-me-excited-all-over-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXVIII
Date: April 1, 2012
Location: Sun Life Stadium, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 78,363
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

We wrap things up with this and a main event which no one ever thought we would see: John Cena vs. The Rock. This is one of if not the only match ever that I had to see. I didn’t know if it would be good or bad, but I needed to see it. The match was announced the night after the last Wrestlemania and was literally built for a year. On the undercard we have Punk vs. Jericho for the world title, Sheamus vs. Bryan for the other title and HHH vs. Undertaker inside the Cell. When that is a DISTANT second match, you know you’ve got something huge. Let’s get to it.

Lillian Garcia sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is about how Cena and Rock’s lives have both built up to this moment and how this match is Once In A Lifetime. Oh and HHH vs. Undertaker is happening too.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Sheamus won the Rumble to earn this show. We’re pre-beard for Bryan here which is weird to see anymore. The bell rings, Bryan kisses his girlfriend AJ, turns around into a Brogue Kick and we have a new champion in 18 seconds. That number would haunt Bryan for at least six months.

Team Johnny is fired up for the twelve man tag for later tonight. Miz brags about being in the main event last year but it’s Otunga who gets them to be quiet for a pep talk from Johnny Ace.

Win tickets to Wrestlemania 29!

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Kane had recently put the mask back on again and went after Orton to prove that he’s still evil because last summer he lost a street fight to Orton and then shook his hand. Why is it Orton who gets these months and years long backstories? The opener didn’t quite have its intended effect as the fans are chanting for Daniel Bryan. Kane takes over to start but the chokeslam is broken up by kicks to the ribs. Orton gets him down and stomps away but Kane reverses the Elevated DDT (called a bulldog by Cole) and takes over with a big boot.

Kane’s low dropkick gets a near fall and it’s off to a chinlock. Back up and they slug it out with Randy taking over. Kane will have none of that though and clotheslines Randy down for two. The side slam gets two more and it’s back to the chinlock. A swinging neckbreaker out of nowhere puts Kane down but the monster hits a vertical suplex for another two count. Off to chinlock #3 as the match slows down again.

Orton backflips out of another side slam and his backbreaker puts Kane down for a bit. There’s the powerslam and Orton is getting fired up. Kane goes shoulder first into the post and now the Elevated DDT hits (again called a bulldog by Cole). The RKO is countered into a big boot for two more for Kane but the top rope clothesline is blocked by a dropkick. Orton loads up the Punt but walks into a chokeslam for a close two. Another RKO is countered and Kane goes to the middle rope. Orton tries a superplex but Kane shrugs him off and hits a middle rope chokeslam for the upset win.

Rating: B-. I had always wanted to see these two have a match and I was pleased when I finally saw it. Kane can have a good match on a big stage when he needs to and that’s what he did here. Orton is bulletproof so it’s not like losing here means anything of note. This was a nice surprise and a good match with a big ending.

Santino is with Mick Foley in a sailor hat and a guy from the fishing show Deadliest Catch. They’re eating crabs and Foley makes bad pirate jokes. Socko and Cobra make appearances, as does Ron Simmons and I think you can get the joke from here.

Some National Guard people are here.

Intercontinental Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Cody is defending and the idea here is that Big Show has never had a good Wrestlemania moment. You know, because winning a meaningless midcard title in 2012 is more important than main eventing the show in possibly the biggest and best year the company has ever had. During the entrance we get some “highlights” from Show’s career. Naturally the pin in the 8 man tag last year is never mentioned at all.

Cody runs to the floor to start but Show easily throws him back into the ring. There’s a beal across the ring and a hard chop in the corner, followed by a Stink Face for good measure. Cody comes back with some dropkicks to the knee and pounds away as much as he can. Rhodes pounds on Show’s back a bit and is LAUNCHED off on the kickout. The champion works on the knee a bit with a standing leg lock and a DDT to take it down. After some stomps to Show’s head, he shoves Cody away with ease but gets caught by the Disaster Kick. A second is countered with a spear though and the WMD makes Show the champion.

Rating: D+. What were you expecting here? At the end of the day, Cody has nothing that was going to keep Show down and with all the building up of the match about Show’s past embarrassments, there was only one way this could end. That and it’s only about five minutes so it didn’t have enough time to suck or anything. Not great but it was exactly what it was expect to be.

Video on what it means to be a Diva.

We recap the Divas tag. Kelly Kelly had been a guest on Extra with Maria Menunos when Eve and Beth came in and claimed they should be the guests. A tag match was made.

Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix vs. Maria Menunos/Kelly Kelly

Beth has….wings on her head? Kelly and the freshly heel Eve start things off with Kelly doing her screaming hurricanrana to take over. A handspring elbow hits Eve’s knee in the corner but Kelly breaks up a moonsault and knocks Eve into the Tree of Woe. Off to Maria for a double Stink Face, resulting in the famous stain on the back of Maria’s tights from Eve’s makeup.

Since Maria isn’t a wrestler, the beatdown on her begins quickly with Eve wrapping her up in a body vice. Off to Beth (in gold tonight) for a side bearhug as the match slows WAY down. Back to Eve for some quick double teaming but she takes too long with the shaky moonsault. It’s back to Kelly as things break down a bit. A top rope seated senton gets two on Beth and the Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog. Back to Maria who goes….up. After getting pulled down, Kelly breaks up a gorilla press and a rollup is enough for Maria to pin Beth.

Rating: D+. Four good looking women in tight outfits and one of them anchors a national television show. Do you really need a further explanation as to why this happened? The interesting note: of these four, Maria is the only one involved with Wrestlemania 29 and that’s as a Hall of Fame inductor.

Shawn Michaels, the guest referee inside the Cell, says either the Undertaker or HHH are done tonight.

New attendance record. As always.

Jim Ross comes out to do commentary for the Cell match.

HHH vs. Undertaker

This is inside Hell in a Cell with Shawn Michaels as guest referee. Undertaker basically became Batman in his cave and wanted a rematch to prove he could beat HHH. As in like he already did. This is also billed as End of an Era, but what era that was never actually became clear. The announcement of the Cell was perfect as HHH said he wanted one more thing, which was presumed to be Streak vs. career. It’s a good lesson in letting the feud set the stipulations, not the calendar. Undertaker debuts his new mohawk here to a gasp from the crowd. The Cell is lowered to Memory Remains by Metallica.

Taker pounds away into the corner to start with “carcinogenic” right hands according to JR. HHH pounds away as well but gets thrown out to the floor soon thereafter. HHH is sent into the Cell a few times and a backdrop puts him down on the floor again. Taker sends him into the steel over and over as it’s one sided so far. Now it’s the steps instead of the Cell with Taker in full control. Back in and a facebuster is no sold and down goes HHH again.

Old School connects and we head back outside again. Shawn isn’t a factor yet. The steps go upside HHH’s head and set up the apron legdrop. Back in and HHH hits a DDT, which somehow makes us completely even. The steps are in the ring now so HHH slams Taker’s head into them a few times. A Pedigree onto the steps is blocked with a backdrop but HHH comes back with a spinebuster onto the steps, only to get caught in the Hell’s Gate. In an impressive power display, HHH lifts Taker up into a powerbomb to break the hold and get two as well.

HHH throws in a pair of chairs and cracks one of them over Taker’s back. Taker is whipped into the steps in the corner before they’re sent to the outside. JR says there are no laws in the Cell. Other than you win by pin or submission and all that. HHH goes off with the chair, DESTROYING Undertaker Austin/Rock style. Shawn takes the chair away and tells HHH to cover Undertaker because he’s not going to quit. Trips takes the chair back and shoves Shawn down before pounding on Taker even more. He tells Shawn to end it before he does.

Taker says do not stop it as he’s getting back up. He turns around though and is hit in the ribs and back by the chair but it only gets two. HHH is starting to get frustrated so he hits Taker in the back with another chair and it’s time for more pathos with Taker saying don’t stop it. Cue the sledgehammer for a shot to the head for ANOTHER two. HHH (who is cut over the eye) has no idea what to do now.

The Game pulls up the hammer to slam it down onto Taker’s head but Shawn pulls it away to prevent the murder. Shawn is ready to stop it as Taker can barely move. Michaels raises his hand but Taker pulls him into the Hell’s Gate to stop him. Trips breaks it up with a hammer shot but Taker comes back with a low blow and Hell’s Gate on HHH. There’s no referee though and Taker lets it go from exhaustion with his opponent out cold.

Another referee comes in as Taker hits a last effort chokeslam for two. Taker chokeslams the referee (I believe that’s the same referee he beat up in 2001 against HHH as well) but walks into the superkick into the Pedigree…..FOR TWO! I lost my mind watching that live because I really thought it was over. Now HHH shoves Shawn to the floor and Taker sits up to scare the life out of HHH. Taker erupts on HHH with a big boot and running clothesline, setting up snake eyes and another boot.

The Tombstone connects but HHH is up at two. Shawn has no idea what to do as both guys are slowly getting up. They slug it out from their knees before getting to their feet for more HARD punches. Another Tombstone is countered into the Pedigree for a VERY close two. HHH goes for the hammer but Taker steps on it to stop him. A HARD chair shot to the back puts HHH down and another one keeps him down.

Some more chair shots get two on HHH so Shawn screams at them to end this. HHH tries a hammer shot to the face but Taker easily blocks it. They stare each other down and HHH gives Taker a crotch chop. Trips walks out of the corner into a hammer shot to the head. HHH tries to climb up Taker’s body but the strap comes down, the throat is slit, and the Tombstone makes it 20-0.

Rating: A+. This is another reason why I’m not so wild on last year’s match: they’re capable of SO much better and this is proof. This match told a great story with both guys destroying each other with Shawn being stuck in the middle and trying to figure out what do do in each situation. It’s a great match, it’s a great fight, and it’s pure emotion the entire time. Great stuff here, and most importantly of all: there were moments where I thought it was over. I never bought that as a possibility last year.

After a few moments on the mat, Taker sits up but falls right back down. He pulls himself up on Shawn and they embrace. HHH is still out cold. Shawn and Taker lift him up and carry him out of the ring. They embrace on the stage in one of the most iconic images you’ll ever see. You don’t often get to use that word, but it’s true in this case.

Send Slim Jims to soldiers! I love charity stuff, but it’s a big shift after what we just sat through.

We get clips of the Hall of Fame stuff from last night.

Here’s the live presentation of the 2012 class: Mil Mascaras, Yokozuna (represented by his kids), Ron Simmons, the Horsemen (including Flair, which set off a lawsuit since he was still under contract to TNA), Mike Tyson and Edge (who gets theme music but has short hair which is such an odd look for him). This was the breather that the fans needed.

Heath Slater tries to get a spot in Flo-Rida’s performance but gets turned and then shoved down. Hawkins and Reks laugh at Slater.

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Johnny: Miz, Mark Henry, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler, David Otunga

Teddy: Kofi Kingston, Great Khali, R-Truth, Zack Ryder (with Eve), Booker T, Santino Marella

Each team has a Bella as a fan, the match is for total control of both brands, and Johnny is in a white suit. Oh and Vickie is with Johnny and Horny is with Teddy as the flag bearers. Otunga and Santino are team captains, because Miz and Booker aren’t good enough. Kofi and Dolph start things off for their usual solid sequence. Truth comes in for a double hiptoss and a dancing legdrop.

McIntyre comes in to pound on Truth but it’s quickly off to Khali to change momentum. It should also be mentioned that they’re in red and blue t-shirts with the GM’s on the front. Off to Booker to chop away on Drew and a superkick puts him down. Booker goes after the rest of Team Johnny but the numbers catch up with him, allowing Swagger to take over. Jack gets to beat on Kofi for a bit and it’s off to Henry. Mark pounds him down in the corner as the match slows way down.

Off to Miz with some knees to the chest and a boot to the face for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit but Booker comes back with a suplex for no cover. Ziggler comes in to break up the tag and drop some elbows for two. Everything starts breaking down as Henry hits the Slam on Booker but Khali chops him down. I can’t keep track of everything going on but Henry catches a diving Horny in mid-air.

The girls get in a brawl and there’s the hot tag to Santino to pound on Miz. The Cobra connects and Cole panics until Ziggler makes the save. Another hot tag brings in Ryder for the Rough Ryder for Dolph and a beatdown on everyone else. He loads up the Broski Boot but Eve gets in the ring as well. The referee tries to get her out and the distraction lets Miz hit the Skull Crushing Finale on Ryder for the pin, making Ace GM of both shows.

Rating: D+. As is the usual case with stuff like this, there was way too much going on to keep track of anything. There were something like 18 people involved in this whole thing and the ending was about Eve and her heel turn more than anything else. Ace would be GM for about four months or so while boring us to death against Cena. Not much to see here though due to the amount of people in the match.

Post match, Eve finally turns on Ryder for good, confirming him as the biggest loser in the WWE. Wasn’t Eve already a heel in the Divas tag? Why is this supposed to be shocking?

Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson are here.

We get a video on the media blitz and activities for Wrestlemania week.

To celebrate winning, Laurinitis changes the Raw World Title match rules so that if Punk gets disqualified, Jericho wins the title.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

This is over who is the best in the world and Jericho claims that Punk is really an alcoholic and his family has a bunch of substance abuse issues. The buildup for this really was good stuff, even though this is nowhere near the main event. Punk takes it to the mat to start and fires off some kicks to the chest. He does the same with knees in the corner but stops when the referee gets to four. Jericho slaps him in the face and takes the beating like a man to try to get the DQ again.

Another few slaps have Punk in a frenzy but he holds off to avoid the DQ. A slam puts Jericho down but he rolls away before the Macho Elbow can be launched. Instead CM dives to the floor to take out Jericho, followed by a wicked smile. Jericho asks how Punk’s sister and father are but Punk doesn’t swing the chair he grabs. Punk charges into a pair of boots to the face and the challenger takes over.

They head to the apron and Punk tries a GTS, only to be clotheslined back into the ring. Jericho hooks a kind of Jackhammer to the floor for two back inside. We hit the chinlock but Punk fights up with a slap. Jericho comes right back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two and kicks the injured back again. Some hard kicks to the torso keep Punk in trouble but he fires off some strikes of his own. The champion goes up but is pulled back down to land hard on his back.

Punk escapes a bow and arrow hold and sidesteps a charge to send Jericho crotch first into the corner. A spinning neckbreaker gets two on Chris and there’s the running knee in the corner. Jericho counters the bulldog but has to stop the Lionsault to avoid knees. That counter is countered into a Walls attempt but Punk shakes him off for two. The Macho Elbow hits knees and Jericho hits the Codebreaker but it sends Punk out to the floor. Back in and Punk grabs a GTS out of nowhere for two.

Punk fires off the kicks and gets two off a quick powerslam. They trade German suplex grips but Punk gets dropped on the top rope to give Jericho control. The Lionsault gets two and Chris goes up, only to be chopped a lot to slow him down. The champion loads up a hurricanrana but gets countered into the Walls in one of Jericho’s classic counters. Punk finally makes the ropes and sends Jericho to the floor to set up the suicide dive.

Jericho staggers to his feet and Punk hits the running knee, crushing Jericho’s head against the post. They head back in and somehow Jericho grabs the Codebreaker out of nowhere for two. Back up and Jericho pounds away on Punk in the corner, only to go up again and get kicked down. The GTS is countered into the Liontamer (the kneeling version of the Walls) in the middle of the ring but shifts it to the regular Walls.

Jericho has to pull him away from the ropes and Punk escapes into dueling small packages. CM rolls through again into the Anaconda Vice but Jericho knees Punk in the back of the head to escape. The Walls don’t work again and Punk hooks another Vice, this time tucking his head in to avoid the knees. Jericho is trapped and finally gives up.

Rating: A. Great match here with both guys destroying each other and countering everything both guys had. I love the ending with Punk getting smarter as he kept going in a good display of psychology. Thankfully the DQ bit didn’t go anywhere which makes it pretty stupid. Excellent match here though which would have been a great main event for any other show of the year.

Wrestlemania 29 is coming to New Jersey, but we’ll bill it as New York because it sounds better.

Here’s Brodus, who had recently debuted as the Funkasaurus. He tells everyone to get their phone, because they’re gonna call their mamas. Brodus calls his own and apparently she’s here tonight……WITH THE BRIDGE CLUB! Cue a troop of old women for a BIG dance party.

Video on G.I. Joe 2 which was just released like two weeks ago. As in nearly a year after this show.

And now, it is time.

We recap Rock vs. Cena which is at least a year in the making. Something like seven years ago Cena insulted Rock in an interview, so when Rock came back to be guest host last year, he insulted Cena in his return promo. The night after Wrestlemania, Cena had challenged Rock to a one on one match at THIS Wrestlemania. This led to a year of build (minus six months for Rock to make a movie of course) which got me to the point where I HAD to see this match. I didn’t know if it was going to be great, if it was going to suck, or somewhere in between, but I needed to see it. That’s never happened to me as a fan before.

Diddy comes out to bring out MGK (a rapper) to perform some song called Invincible. He does this stupid monologue about how Cena is a huge underdog in this, despite Cena being active having more experience overall than Rock. Cena is booed out of the building but gives something to an old lady who apparently is related to some Hall of Famer. We should be ready for Rock’s entrance, but first we need Flo-Rida to perform two songs. I remember SCREAMING to get to it at this point. Oh and Flo has a bunch of dancers with him, presumably the same girls who were in the Bridge Club ten minutes ago.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Rock’s ovation is thunderous. There’s really no other way to put it as it’s very clear who the fans are for here. During the big match intros, Cena is booed even further out of the stadium. They stare each other down and FINALLY the bell rings. Cena shoves him away to start and the dueling chants begin. They lock up again and this time Cena goes flying. Rock grabs a headlock before they fight over arm control.

A few armdrags put Cena down and a cradle gets a quick two for Cena. Cena has to make sure it wasn’t three as he looks a bit shaken. Back up and John leapfrogs over Rock before taking him down with a headlock takeover. They get up again and Rock tries a quick Sharpshooter but Cena bails to the floor. Rock decks him as he gets back in but Cena charges at him in the corner with a hard shoulder to the ribs. Cena gets a quick one count off a clothesline before putting on a bearhug on the mat.

Back up and Rock punches away but gets low bridged out to the floor. Cena drops him ribs first onto the barricade and announce table before going to the ring for a seat. When Rock won’t quit Cena throws him back inside and gets a two count. We’re definitely in another gear now. Off to a bearhug on Rock’s bad ribs but he won’t quit. Rock finally comes back with right hands to escape and a DDT for two.

Rock wins a quick slugout and hits the spinebuster but Cena picks the leg to break up the Elbow. Cena comes back with his finishing sequence but the AA is escaped. A double clothesline puts both guys down as they take a breather. After a few moments on the mat they slug it out with Cena punching Rock down to his knees. Rock fires off more punches and does You Can’t See Me before trying the spit punch, only to get caught in the AA for a close two.

Cena goes to pick Rock up but takes the Rock Bottom for two for the Brahma Bull. Rock stomps away in the corner but walks into a side slam for two. John goes up top for a very delayed top rope Fameasser for another near fall. Rock comes back with a spinebuster into the Sharpshooter but he doesn’t have it on well. Cena crawls to the rope so Rock lets go and pounds away. Back to the Sharpshooter (why don’t more people do that? Even if Cena won’t quit you can still do more damage) but Cena makes the rope immediately again. Gee maybe if he had pulled Cena from the rope it would have been harder to escape.

Rock fires off some elbows to the chest and sends Cena into the steps for good measure. Back inside and Cena tries a sunset flip of all things but immediately shifts into the STF in the middle of the ring. Cena drags him back to the middle of the ring and Rock is starting to fade. We get an old school arm check and Rock holds it up on the third drop. I love stuff like that. Rock makes it to the ropes and as they get back up, Cena walks into a Samoan drop to put both guys down.

Another slugout goes to Rock and the spinebuster sets up the Elbow……for TWO. The place is losing their minds on these kickouts and can you blame them a bit? Both guys are spent here but Cena hits a catapult into the corner for two. With nothing left to try, Cena loads up the middle rope AA but Rock shoves him off and tries a top rope cross body but Cena rolls through into the BIG AA for an even closer two. Cena begs the referee to call it three. That gets him nowhere so Cena loads up a People’s Elbow. As he hits the second rope, Rock nips up and hits the Rock Bottom for the shocking pin.

Rating: A+. What else do you want from this? This is one of those matches which could have gone either way as they beat the tar out of each other. They had the big fight atmosphere down to perfection here and while the ending is still questionable (yet not completely wrong), it’s exactly what you want a Wrestlemania main event to be. This somehow surpassed the hype and was excellent in every sense of the word.

Cena sits on the ramp, stunned.

Rock poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. This is one of the best shows of all time, bar none. The two big matches delivered far better than you could have hoped for, the Raw title match was great, nothing sucked, there are multiple Wrestlemania Moments on here, and the crowd was white hot all night. This is easily in the highest levels of Wrestlemanias ever and it’s every bit as good as it was when I watched it live. Great stuff and absolutely worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus

Original:

Redo: N/A

Kane vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Kelly Kelly/Maria Menunos vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

Original: C+

Redo: D+

HHH vs. Undertaker

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Original: C

Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

Original: A

Redo: A

The Rock vs. John Cena

Original: B+

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A+

Redo: A

I shortchanged that main event terribly. It’s a masterpiece.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/04/01/wrestlemania-xxviii-one-of-the-best-shows-of-all-time/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXVIII
Date: April 1, 2012
Location: Sun Life Stadium, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 78,363
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
America the Beautiful: Lillian Garcia

As I wrote out that title, I almost started shaking. Today is Wrestlemania Sunday. In less than two and a half hours, the show is going to begin. This is the day that we as fans wait for all year long. Everything ends tonight and at the same time, everything begins. You all know the card by now, but for those who might forget, the main event is John Cena vs. The Rock, Once In A Lifetime (until ratings go down and we need a rematch). Let’s get to it.

First up we’ve got a pre-show match as a bonus.

Tag Titles: Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd vs. Primo/Epico vs. Usos

Primo/Epico have the titles and have beaten the Usos about five times already. Kidd and Gabriel are teaming for the first time after Kidd asked Gabriel if he wanted to be a team. Gabriel said yes, and apparently that qualifies you as deserving a title match. New tights for the Usos here. Josh and Striker are doing commentary for this match. This is under WCW rules as in three in the ring at once, but in a twist you can only tag your own partner.

Jey, Tyson and Primo start things off. Primo is sent to the floor and Tyson gets two off a sunset flip. Primo comes back in with a missile dropkick as Jey gets beaten down. Kidd makes the save but gets DDTed for two. Primo loads up a superplex on Jey but Tyson springboards up to make it a Tower of Doom in a cool twist on the traditional spot there. Tags bring in Epico and Jimmy but I think Kidd is still legal for his team.

Jimmy comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body and a Bubba Bomb for two. Tag to Gabriel who jumps over Jimmy but walks into a Samoan attack. Back to Jey who hits an assisted Samoan Drop. Jimmy tags in quickly for a double Rikishi attack to Epico and Gabriel. Epico gets dropped onto Primo so Jey can hit a HUGE dive onto both of them.

Kidd pops up on the apron but Jimmy launches him to Jey for a Samoan Drop. Gabriel sets for a top rope Asai Moonsault and hits it on his second attempt. Better safe than sorry on that spot. He tries the springboard 450 but (mostly) hits knees. Backstabber by Epico pins Jey at 5:05.

Rating: B-. Really fun opener here with the six smaller guys being thrown out there to fire up the crowd. That’s what cruiserweights and hot Latin women that can shake their hips were made for so you can’t ask for much more than that. I’m a big Uso fan so seeing them on Wrestlemania was a cool thing to see. Very good start to the night.

Lillian opens us with America the Beautiful. She even sings the second verse.

The opening video is about how this is the beginning, which includes a set of clips of the beginning of a lot of guys’ careers, including some shots of Cena in OVW. We also get some shots of the main guys’ careers. It’s the four in the main events only, which makes sense.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Makes sense. Might as well make this the most worthless world title match in company history given the build for it so far. Cole and Lawler are calling this alone. Bryan has his robe here and AJ is looking GREAT. We get the kiss to start and Brogue Kick and it’s over in 8 seconds. I kid you not it was that fast.

We have 7 matches left and almost four hours to go. Each match could conceivably get 20 minutes each.

Miz fires up Team Johnny in the back. They don’t seem to care until Otunga comes in to introduce Johnny in a white suit. He says this is going to be a night in the ranks of Hogan slamming Andre and Austin refusing to submit to Bret.

Win a trip to Wrestlemania 29.

Kane vs. Randy Orton

This is over Kane shaking Randy’s hand last year and hating himself for it. I can’t imagine this feud isn’t going to continue after this. Seeing Kane in daylight in the welder’s mask makes him look pretty ridiculous. Kane takes him into the corner to start as I think the fans are chanting for Orton. Well it’s longer than the previous match at least. Orton escapes a chokeslam and stomps on the foot/ankle.

Elevated DDT (called a bulldog by that idiot Cole) is countered and Kane drapes him over the top rope for a big boot. This is Kane’s 14th Mania which has to be up there on the all time list. Kane takes him down and it’s off to a chinlock. Orton fights up with punches but runs into the uppercut for two. Side slam gets two. Kane again stops Orton’s comeback and hits a vertical suplex for two.

A headbutt slows Kane down and Orton spins out of another side slam via a backflip. Orton’s backbreaker puts Kane down but his clotheslines don’t do much. There’s the powerslam and Kane’s shoulder goes into the post. Kane comes back and goes up but his clothesline is countered by a dropkick in a cool spot. Orton loads up the Punt but runs into the chokeslam for two. Kane is frustrated so he does an Undertaker situp.

He pounds Orton down in the corner but Randy comes back with a right of his own. RKO is countered but Orton kicks the knee out again. Randy charges into an elbow and Kane goes up but there’s Orton again. Orton pounds him down on the ropes and goes up with him. He loads up something but Kane grabs him by the throat and gets the pin with a super chokeslam at 10:55.

Rating: B-. This was my upset pick and I wasn’t disappointed. That ending was pretty cool too as it looked great. Orton usually brings it at Wrestlemania and this was no exception as he got a decent match out of Kane. I’m likely overrating it but this is a match I’ve wanted to see for years.

Santino is with a captain from the show Deadliest Catch. They’re having I think king crabs and Mick Foley is with them. He puts on a yellow hat and talks like a pirate but the captain tells him no one talks like that. There are Socko and The Cobra and they attack the crabs. Ron Simmons comes in and you know the rest.

The National Guard is awesome.

Intercontinental Title: Big Show vs. Cody Rhodes

The idea here is that Big Show can’t win at Wrestlemania and Cody has made fun of him for it. Cody immediately bails to the floor and Show goes after him. Cody has red trunks tonight. He dives onto Show on the floor and is tossed back in via a SCARY show of strength. Show destroys Cody with chops and gives him a Stink Face. Cody goes after the knee to get Big Show down which is smart.

Show is down on the mat now as Cody shouts about how this is his moment. He hooks a standing leg lock and Show is in some trouble. He starts to get up but Cody drapes the arm across the top rope to slow him down. Disaster Kick (I guess it’s no longer Beautiful) staggers Show but a second attempt results in a spear. WMD gives Show the title at 5:23.

Rating: D+. I wasn’t wild on this but it’s a good way to get the title off Rhodes. That being said, I don’t buy the whole “Show gets his moment” deal at all. He was in the main event before, so how exactly is winning the IC Title in about 5 minutes a bigger deal? Doesn’t work for me at all, but this should be enough for Cody to move up the ladder.

Show cries post match and kisses I’m assuming his wife.

Video on what it means to be a Diva. This would be better used with the sound off.

Maria Menounos/Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres

This is a REALLY risky move as the other four matches are Punk vs. Jericho, the Cell, the main event and the Battle of the GM’s. That’s a stacked final four matches and I’d be worried about them overcrowding the second half of the show. We get the video of the evil ones invading Extra. Maria arguing back at them is still horribly bad. She has a legit case of bad ribs due to Dancing With The Stars, plus stress fractures in her feet.

The sun has gone down now and the stadium looks awesome. Eve and Kelly start things off. Kelly charges into a boot in the corner but the moonsault results in her getting crotched. Here’s Maria and it’s a double Stink Face. Beth kicks her in the bad ribs and Eve goes with a bodyscissors. Maria fires off some decent elbows as the fans chant for her to tap. Beth comes in with a modified bearhug but Maria fights out and tags Kelly.

The annoying screaming blonde does her usual stuff but adds a Molly Go Round for two as Eve saves. Glam Slam is countered into a bulldog and there’s the tag to Maria. She….goes up and this isn’t going to end well. Beth drills her and sets for a gorilla press, but Kelly gets her down and shoves Beth into Eve so Maria can get the rollup pin at 6:54.

Rating: C+. You know, given the amount of injuries to Maria, this was really impressive. That girl legit tries out there every time and you can’t ask for more than anything than that. Decent match and the Kelly flip dive wasn’t bad. When Kelly is the worst worker in a match that involves a celebrity, you know there’s a problem.

Shawn says this match is the end of an era. If HHH loses, it’s the end of the Game. Shawn thinks it’s ironic that he can end an era.

New attendance record: 78,363.

JR is here to call the rest of the show. Is that a beard on him?

The Undertaker vs. HHH

Well this is quite the first hour main event. It’s 8:03 and we’ve got four matches left, which means this and Rock vs. Cena are going to need to be about 35 minutes each. They can do it but that would be a lot. This is billed as The End of an Era, but I don’t know what HHH is exactly putting up. If he loses, it’s the same thing as last year. This is inside Hell in a Cell and Shawn Michaels is guest referee.

No buildup package so I’ll help you out here. Taker beat HHH last year but had to be carried out, so he asked for a rematch. HHH didn’t want to do it so Taker played the “Shawn is better than you” card to get him to say yes. The rest of it was a lot of ego stroking and here we are. HHH’s big entrance this year is him coming out of something that looks like Vader’s old helmet with spikes on it.

Shawn’s shirt isn’t tucked in. It’s Wrestlemania and he’s that sloppy? I think we need a new icon. Taker’s robe looks like it has muscles painted onto it. Or does it look Japanese? These entrances still give me chills, even if he’s bald under there. We get lightning, thunder and smoke as always. His head isn’t completely bald but it’s close enough. It’s almost a mowhawk with hair on the side of it if that makes sense. That look kind of works on him actually.

The Cell is lowered to Memory Remains by Metallica. Slugout to start and JR calls Taker’s punches carcinogenic. HHH comes back so Taker throws him into the corner. The haircut is attributed to HHH not giving him a rematch immediately. Ok then. Out to the floor and Taker goes into the Cell. Now HHH goes into it and is backdropped. This appears to be the taller model with the very little space between the cage and the ring.

Taker pounds on him and chokes on the floor. Shawn tries to break up the choking but Taker knocks him away. Into the cage again as Taker has controlled so far. HHH goes into the steps and we go back inside. The Facebuster is no sold and Taker clotheslines him down. Old School connects and HHH is down. Back to the floor and Taker rams the steps into the Game’s face.

The steps are placed in the ring and Taker this the legdrop (loathsome according to JR) on the apron. Back in HHH grabs a DDT from out of nowhere to put both guys down. HHH rams Taker’s head into the steps three times and tries a Pedigree on the steps which is countered into a backdrop. Taker charges into a spinebuster onto the steps but he manages to grab the Hell’s Gate which won the match last year. In a REALLY impressive counter, HHH picks him up into a powerbomb for two.

We’re ten minutes into this and it feels like we’re only in the beginning. Here are two chairs from HHH and one goes into Taker’s ribs and back. The steps are set up in the corner and Taker gets whipped into them. HHH throws them out of the ring and there’s another chair to the back of Undertaker. The Game goes Stone Cold with the chair and Shawn tries to stop him but can’t.

Shawn finally throws the chair out and HHH says if Shawn wants it to end, then end it. HHH grabs the other chair and shoves Shawn down to beat on Taker some more. That must be about 20 shots with it so far. Taker specifically says not to stop it when Shawn asks. Taker gets up and a shot to the ribs and back puts him right back down, getting two. HHH heads to the floor and there’s the sledgehammer.

HHH says he doesn’t care as he’s basically turning heel mid match. He keeps telling Shawn to end it but Taker keeps saying no when Shawn asks to end it. Sledgehammer to the face gets two. There appears to be some blood over HHH’s eye and oh yes there is. It’s not bad but it’s certainly there. HHH sets for a BIG shot to Taker’s prone head but Shawn stops it and throws the hammer to the floor.

HHH keeps shouting at Shawn to end it because Taker is done. Shawn pulls his finger up to end it but can’t do it. He looks at Taker and thinks about doing it again but still can’t do it. Now he looks at Taker again…and Taker puts Shawn in the Hell’s Gate! HHH hits Taker in the head with the hammer but Shawn is down now. HHH sets for a big hammer shot but Taker kicks him low and puts the Hell’s Gate on again.

There’s no Shawn and HHH drops the hammer. HHH tries the powerbomb counter but can’t do it. He grabs the hammer again but passes out. No wait he’s back up. Taker’s face is a meme in waiting. Shawn is still down and Taker has to let the hold go due to exhaustion. Both guys are out. Here’s Charles Robinson who unlocks the cage to a ton of booing. Chokeslam to HHH gets two. Robinson gets a chokeslam for the count. Eh you knew it was going to be Shawn to count the fall so that’s no shock.

The fans think this is awesome and they would be correct. Shawn kicks Taker into the Pedigree but it gets a VERY close two. I really thought that was it. That didn’t happen at all last year which makes this even better than last year. Shawn is distraught that he almost counted the fall after interfering. HHH has the hammer again and he throws Shawn to the floor. The Game goes after Taker with the hammer but Taker sits up, making HHH fall down in fear.

Here’s the Big Dead Comeback with all of his old favorites. Snake Eyes into the big boot is followed by a legdrop. Tombstone plants HHH but only gets two. Not even a close two either. Shawn looks like he’s about to cry in the corner. They slug it out from their knees to their feet and HHH Pedigrees him out of nowhere for two. It wasn’t a great one so it’s a bit more believable. Taker sits up again and grabs a chair. HHH has the hammer but Taker steps on it. Now HHH takes the beating with the chair and the chair is bent. All of the shots only get two though.

Shawn yells at both of them to let it end already. HHH tries to grab Shawn to pull himself up and gets the hammer. Taker can’t follow up and HHH is in agony. He tries a hammer shot but Taker blocks it due to HHH’s exhaustion. Now Taker has the hammer and HHH shoves him away. There’s a crotch chop so Taker hits him in the face with the hammer. Shawn turns his back on the match and the hammer is thrown to the floor. There go the straps and the throat slit sets up the tombstone for the pin at 30:53.

Rating: A+. I liked this a lot better than last year’s. Of the four matches these three have combined for, I’d put this at second best after HBK vs. Taker I, which is pretty high praise. Great match with some great drama and there were actual moments here where I thought the Streak was over, namely the DX Special finisher. Shawn added something here, but I don’t think it was as epic as they were shooting for. The Cell wasn’t a huge factor but it did add something to it as far as a visual goes. Great match and I loved it.

Shawn pulls Taker to his feet post match. Both of them help HHH to the back in a cool visual.

Hall of Fame video. It’s cool to see Flair up there.

Here are the Hall of Fame inductees. The Fink does the intros which is good. That man belongs at Wrestlemania. Tyson does a crotch chop of course. Edge is on the stage and gets his theme music played. No one says anything but it’s cool to see Flair there. Note that I said there and not in the ring.

Win a trip to Wrestlemania 29!

Josh is about to talk to Flo Rida when Heath freaking Slater says interview him instead. Flo Rida comes out and Slater asks about a duet. That gets a no so Slater wants to be a DJ or backup dancer. Those both get a no. Flo Rida says Slater can hold his mic. Slater gets in his face and Flo Rida shoves him into a wall. Hawkins and Reks come in to laugh at Slater. Ok then.

Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy

Johnny: The Miz, Mark Henry, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler, David Otunga (captain)
Teddy: Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Booker T, Great Khali, Zack Ryder, Santino Marella (captain)

Otunga has his coffee cup with him too which is awesome. Vickie and Horny are flagbearers. The winning GM controls both shows. Eve is with Ryder. Aksana looks good in the Teddy shirt. Dolph and Kofi start things off and Dolph takes over. Kofi comes back with a top rope cross body for two and here’s Truth. Spinning legdrop gets two but Ziggler dropkicks him down.

Off to Drew who gets caught by the Lie Detector. Khali comes in and chops a bit before Booker gets the tag. Side slam gets two. JR is gone now. Otunga gets in a shot to Booker and Drew’s big boot allows him to tag Swagger. Why is swagger in aquamarine? He’s an ALL AMERICAN AMERICAN. Swagger takes him down and it’s time for Henry. He does absolutely nothing so it’s time for Miz.

Running knee lift gets two and it’s off to a chinlock. Back to Ziggy for a knee drop and then back to Miz. Booker finally gets some breathing room but Henry comes in for the World’s Strongest Slam. Khali chops Henry down and everything breaks down. Kofi/Truth hit double dropkicks to send the heels to the floor. For some reason they throw Horny onto Henry and then along with Ryder hit stereo dives to the floor. Aksana spears Vickie as the match is a mess.

Booker and Miz are down in the ring at the moment but there’s the tag to Santino. Santino does his usual stuff and the saluting headbutt from the top. Cobra is loaded up but he stops to go after Johnny. Cobra to Miz gets two as Dolph makes a VERY close save. Tag to Ryder who monkey flips Dolph and a neckbreaker takes down Miz. He loads up the Rough Ryder but Miz throws him onto Ziggler. He loads up the Broski Boot but Eve comes in for no apparent reason. The distraction lets Miz hit the Finale on Ryder for the pin at 10:42.

Rating: C. Was Otunga ever in the match? This was pretty much exactly what was expected with Eve screwing over the team “by mistake” and Johnny’s team winning. I don’t think anyone ever thought Team Teddy had a chance and even further ends the Brand Split, which is more or less dead already. No issues here for the most part.

Eve kicks Ryder in the balls post match and walks off with her hand on her hip.

Extreme Rules is in four weeks.

Alex Rodriguez and Torrie Wilson are here.

Video on what WWE has done for Miami.

Ace brags to Punk a bit about the win. If Punk gets disqualified, he loses the title. That sounds like the perfect setup for a rematch where Punk can’t get disqualified at Extreme Rules.

Raw World Title: Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk

If Punk, the champion, gets DQ’ed, he loses the title. We get a quick video recapping Punk’s rise up the roster and Jericho saying that Punk has addiction in his blood. They go to the mat quickly and Punk stomps away on him in the corner. Jericho slaps him as he’s trying to get disqualified. Punk stomps to four and then stops each time which is a nice touch. Jericho slaps him two more times and then hides. Punk dropkicks him in the corner and pounds on him to four again.

Jericho shouts about Punk’s father, earning him more elbows to the head. Punk loads up the Macho Elbow but Jericho rolls to the floor. Punk is cool with that and hits a top rope clothesline for two. Jericho asks about Punk’s sister which draws a chair from Punk but he won’t swing. A line about Punk’s sister being a drug addict doesn’t do it so Punk kicks him in the ribs instead. Punk throws the chair away and walks into a bottom rope dropkick (yes a bottom rope dropkick) to take the champion down.

Back elbow puts Punk on the outside. They go to the apron and Punk tries a GTS but the Canadian escapes and clotheslines Punk back in. Jericho suplexes him to the floor and it almost looked like a Jackhammer. Back inside that gets two. Butterfly backbreaker gets the same. Jericho is working on the back to set up the Walls. Off to a chinlock and then a kick to the back. Surfboard submission goes on so Punk jumps up into a dropkick to the gut in a nice counter.

Punk counters the bulldog by sending Jericho into the corner crotch first. CM makes his comeback with kicks and chops, plus a neckbreaker for two. Punk hits the knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered. Lionsault gets knees but Jericho counters into the Walls but that gets countered. Sweet sequence. High kick gets two and Chris is down. The Macho Elbow looks awkward as it looked like it hit but I think Jericho put his knees up, which doesn’t do much good for an elbow. That looked weird.

Codebreaker hits but Punk rolls out. Jericho throws him back in but walks into the GTS. Punk can’t cover immediately though and Jericho gets his foot on the rope. Another high kick misses but a powerslam gets two. We get a series of standing switches resulting in Jericho draping him over the top and hitting the Lionsault for two. Chris goes up and Punk tries a rana, but Jericho counters into the Walls in a sweet counter that I’ve seen him use before. Punk of course gets the rope but getting there was cool.

Jericho charges at him but Punk backdrops him to the floor. Punk is holding his back and Jericho stands in perfect position for the suicide dive from Punk. The fans are a little dead for some reason. I don’t get why as this has been a good match. In a SICK spot, Punk hits the running knee to the head of Jericho while it’s against the post.

Punk tries the springboard clothesline but jumps into the Codebreaker for two. That would have been back to back losses at Mania due to the springboard for Punk. Two GTS’s are countered and Jericho is getting frustrated. He goes up but Punk kicks him in the back. GTS is countered AGAIN, this time into the Liontamer and then the Walls. Punk crawls for the rope but Jericho drags him back into the middle.

The champ crawls through the legs into a small package and they reverse it a few times but Punk counters into the Vice which Jericho counters into a rollup for two but he can’t break the hold. Now Jericho knees him in the back of the head and FINALLY breaks the hold, countering into a Walls attempt. Punk counters THAT into the Vice and this time he leans his head forward so Jericho can’t knee him. Jericho is forced to tap at 22:23.

Rating: A. ANOTHER awesome match here. That finishing sequence was absolutely awesome with some SICK counters. I’m not sure if I’d call it a masterpiece or anything, but these two nailed it and it looked like Punk outsmarted Jericho using psychology he gained throughout the match, which is great stuff. Loved this and it’s another great match on a GREAT show so far.

Mania 29 will be in New Jersey.

FUNKASAURUS!!! AND HE’S TALKING!!! I don’t think most people care about him. He asks people to pull out their phones because they’re going to call their mamas. Brodus calls his mama and says he wishes she was there. His mama is here with the bridge club apparently. She was in the back….and he didn’t know it? She’s a woman with really weird hair and what has to be……oh my goodness the bridge club is all here to dance with her. There must be 20 old women out there dancing. I think I need a minute.

Go see G.I. Joe 2.

Clips of the Once in a Lifetime special to hype up the main event. If you don’t get the story here, go look it up.

Diddy introduces some rapper to sing one of the theme songs. The rapper defines an underdog who apparently is Cena in this. Uh….not quite but ok.

John Cena vs. The Rock

Writing that gave me a chill. Cena is booed but it’s not horrible. We get his traditional shot from the back as he runs to the ring. There’s a new green shirt too. Ok now he’s getting booed. There’s nothing really special to Cena’s entrance this year. Once Cena is in the ring Flo Rida does the other theme song to the show with a full set of backup dancers. Now some chick comes out to sing another song with him. Could the timing on this be worse?

Rock’s entrance really could have done without the dance troupe behind him and it made things look a bit less epic than they were going for. He looked like he was going in for a big fight though and that’s the important thing. We get a shot from above the stadium and it looks AWESOME. We get big match intros. This is really happening. Oh THERE are the boos for Cena. There are some cheers and it’s nowhere near MITB but it’s up there. Big pop for Rock as expected.

The bell rings at 10:24:42 after about a minute of staring. My heart is beating out of my chest as I can’t believe it’s finally here. They lock up and Cena shoves him off. He looks like he lost five pounds of air with the exhale after that. The dueling chants begin and it’s certainly not a one sided crowd. Rock shoves Cena off. That’s so Hogan (in a good way). They lock up again and Rock grabs a headlock.

They fight over a wristlock and Rock does Owen’s counter into a pair of armdrags and La Majistral for two. He did that at Survivor Series and Cena still looks stunned. Cena whips him in and gets perhaps the highest leapfrog I’ve ever seen into a headlock takeover. No one has an advantage of note after about four minutes. Rock lowers his head for Cena to kick him and Rock pops him with a right.

Cena charges and Rock tries a Sharpshooter, but John rolls to the floor. Rock catches Cena coming in but Cena sends him into the corner and hits some shoulders. Clothesline gets one and Rock gets to the rope. You know it occurs to me: Cena has an experience advantage here and a big one at that. He’s been in WWE going on ten years, whereas Rock was around less than seven in total, and that’s stretching A LOT.

Rock fires off some punches but misses a charge to send him to the floor. They’re starting slow but we have almost half an hour for the slow build. Rock gets dropped on the barricade and they go to the floor. Cena drops the ribs into the announce table and sits in the ring. Back in the ring and Cena is in control. Belly to belly gets two as he keeps working on the ribs. Now a bearhug which is a smart move. Cena’s power is often forgotten until the end of the match so this makes sense.

Rock fights out of it with punches and a DDT, but Cena fights back. Now Rock comes back with punches and the jumping clothesline. Spinebuster looks to set up the elbow but Cena picks the leg for an STF attempt. That gets countered so Cena comes back with the shoulders and ProtoBomb. The Shuffle hits but the AA is countered and they clothesline (kind of) each other.

They slug it out and Rock takes over with faster punches. He tries to do You Can’t See Me but Cena grabs the AA for two. NOW this is getting good, almost fifteen minutes into it. That’s not a bad thing mind you as it’s about what happens in every main event match. Cena might have a cut next to his nose but it’s not bad. Cena goes after Rock and gets caught in the Rock Bottom for two. Rock hammers him in the corner but walks into a side slam for two.

Cena goes up and takes forever, but manages to hit the top rope Fameasser for two. Out of nowhere Rock grabs the Sharpshooter and somehow it’s gotten even worse. We’re over twenty minutes into this and Rock is getting frustrated. Sharpshooter goes on again and he’s just pulling on the feet instead of wrapping his arm around them. They go to the floor as we’re over 20 minutes into this.

Cena goes into the steps and Rock is in full control so far. John goes into the steps again but as they come back in he sunset flips Rock (that boy can JUMP) but instead of covering he hooks the STF. The leg is bent in a freaky way. Rock almost gets the rope so Cena lets go and pulls back to the middle of the ring. Rock is starting to fade and he’s not very close to the rope. The referee takes forever to check the arm and it drops once. It drops twice, but on the third try Rock continues to channel Hogan (again awesome) to raise the arm. He FINALLY makes the rope and we’re not done yet.

We’re 24 minutes into this so it’s got to be running short on time. It’s 10:49 now so it can’t break forty minutes. Cena is tired but he walks into a Samoan Drop to put both guys down. They slug it out and both finishers are countered. Spinebuster puts Cena down and there goes the elbow pad. The People’s Elbow hits for two. Cena grabs a small package (easy big fella) for two. John grabs a slingshot to send Rock into the buckle and a rollup gets two.

Cena drives him to the corner and puts Rock up on the second rope. He looks like he’s setting for a superplex but Rock shoves him off. Rock looks very tired and I can’t blame him. It’s his first singles match in about 9 years and he’s going half an hour. Rock goes up top (huh?) and tries a cross body but Cena rolls throug and flips him onto his shoulders for the AA for TWO. I thought that might have been it. It’s 10:54 and they’ve gone thirty minutes now. John looks at his hand, takes off the wristband, and sets for the People’s Elbow but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin at 30:40. WOW.

Rating: B+. I have no idea what the point of that is, but they did it. The match was never going to be able to live up to the hype and I don’t think it was going to ever be able to do so. I really don’t agree with the ending as there’s no incentive for a rematch now, Cena looks like he can’t beat a guy that’s been retired almost longer than he was active, and it does nothing for the guys sticking around. I don’t get it at all. Good match, close to great, not a masterpiece.

Rock poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. This was an incredible show and one of the best Wrestlemanias I’ve ever seen. I was really worried about the pacing of the show for awhile but they pulled it off really well and it never dragged. There were multiple classics and that’s exactly what Wrestlemania is supposed to be. When the worst match is probably the Divas, that’s definitely a good sign.

As for the main event, it was indeed very good but I didn’t like the ending. Granted that’s two minutes after it so maybe that’ll change. I don’t hate it, but I don’t like it that well at the moment. Still though, it’s a very good match to end an amazing show and we’ll have to see where things go from here. Absolutely worth seeing though.

Results
Sheamus b. Daniel Bryan – Brogue Kick
Kane b. Randy Orton – Middle Rope Chokeslam
Big Show b. Cody Rhodes – WMD
Maria Menounous/Kelly Kelly b. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres – Rollup to Beth
Undertaker b. HHH – Tombstone
Team Johnny b. Team Teddy – Skull Crushing Finale to Ryder
CM Punk b. Chris Jericho – Anaconda Vice
The Rock b. John Cena – Rock Bottom

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Wrestlemania XXVII
Date: April 3, 2011
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 71,617
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Josh Matthews

There’s a bit more to the main event than Rock just returning. The night he returned, he cut a long promo about how things had changed, including John Cena being the top star in the company. There is real tension between the two of them and people are expecting it to boil over soon. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan (I think you know him) is challenging and it’s almost strange to see him with short hair and clean shaven. Daniel moonsaults over the champ to start before the yet to be named YES kicks send Sheamus outside. That’s not cool with Mark Henry as he throws Sheamus back inside for more kicks from Daniel. Sheamus grabs a quick tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two but the High Cross is broken up. The champ is sent to the floor where he gets in a fight with the lumberjacks, triggering a huge brawl to throw the match out at 4:19.

Rating: D+. These two would later get to show that they have good chemistry but the four minute clock here didn’t give them time to go anywhere. It doesn’t help that the match was designed to set up something else instead of having a definitive ending. We’re not done with these two though.

Smackdown General Manager Teddy Long comes out to say let’s have a battle royal.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

R-Truth, Great Khali, David Hart-Smith, Mark Henry, Johnny Curtis, Evan Bourne, Trent Barretta, Chris Masters, JTG, Yoshi Tatsu, Chavo Guerrero, Ted DiBiase, Tyler Reks, William Regal, Drew McIntyre, Curt Hawkins, Tyson Kidd, Primo, Zack Ryder, Jimmy Uso, Jey Uso, Daniel Bryan, Sheamus

Curtis is a generic guy who would later be known as Fandango and I think you know the Usos. Khali throws out Reks and Hawkins in the first twenty seconds and Henry tosses Tatsu a few seconds later. The match slows down a lot and everyone brawls with everyone with no one getting close to an elimination. Jimmy Uso is hanging onto the ropes and pulls them down to eliminate Truth.

Henry dumps both Usos a few seconds later and a big group of people gets rid of Mark. Primo and Ryder go out in quick succession and Drew has to last on the apron. Chavo tries to knock McIntyre out but gets backdropped to the floor and Khali knocks out Hart-Smith. JTG is dumb enough to go up top and gets chopped out by Khali. Bryan throws Kidd out and McIntyre eliminates Trent.

Curtis tries to fight Regal, Sheamus and McIntyre at the same time for reasons that aren’t clear, earning himself an elimination. Masters chops at Drew but gets sent to the apron where he tries the Masterlock. Oh come on dude you’re smarter than that. Drew goes down and Evan tries Air Bourne, only to have Sheamus throw Evan down after the crash. DiBiase eliminates Regal and Drew kicks Ted in the face for an elimination. Bryan dumps McIntyre but gets pulled to the apron by Sheamus who kicks Bryan to the floor. Khali and Sheamus are the last two in and a clothesline gives Khali the win at 8:29.

Rating: D. This is becoming the standard operating procedure for these matches and again, it’s hard to really complain when it’s a relatively short battle royal just there as a DVD bonus. Khali winning is fine as he hadn’t done anything for years at this point so throw him a bone to make a victory over him mean a little bit more.

Keri Hilson sings America the Beautiful.

The set is a big sign saying WRESTLEMANIA and a big arch over the stage. It’s a simpler design but it works quite well.

The cylinder from last year has been replaced by an even bigger cube.

We don’t go straight to the opening video as a voiceover which sounds like a daytime game show host or a late night talk show announcer introduces “a supernova of entertainment” named The Rock. It’s pretty safe to say that Rock is still incredibly over as the fans practically worship at his feet.

Rock walks around a bit before hitting the FINALLY line about Atlanta and Wrestlemania. He wants to know if we can feel, taste and smell the electricity. I don’t think you can taste electricity but if you try you’ll certainly feel something. It’s time to do something special and have some fun. Therefore, when Rock says wrestle, the fans will say mania. After that wastes some time, Rock wants to talk about someone who is deciding which Fruity Pebbles shirt to put on tonight (if that line makes no sense, Rock had said Cena looked like a great big bowl of Fruity Pebbles because of all his shirts).

The fans chant CENA SUCKS and then switch to FRUITY PEBBLES. Rock stops for some of the People’s Water (his words) before saying yabba, which means he wants the people to say dabba. He rhymes a bit with his catchphrases (“Always defiant and standing taller than Andre the Giant!”) and says this is bigger than Christmas (“Sorry Santa but the Rock is bringing it all over Atlanta!”) before having the people join him for IF YA SMELL to wrap up this ten minute monologue, which really wasn’t funny.

The opening video is the standard operating procedure: talking about the history of the event with the major highlight clips before an assortment of stuff on the major matches. This still works so why mess with it?

Cole: “This is the fabric of Americana!” Cole, in his own plastic box, is one of the top heels in the company and is already arguing with Lawler, who he’ll be facing tonight in Lawler’s first ever Wrestlemania match.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Edge

Alberto (who won the 2011 Royal Rumble to earn this shot) is challenging and comes out in a Rolls Royce (he was a car guy, to put it mildly) with his personal ring announcer Ricardo Rodriguez doing his introduction. Del Rio also has Brodus Clay as his bodyguard so Edge brings out Christian as backup. Feeling out process to start until Edge gets shoved into the corner but he comes out with a slap to the face.

The champ gets stomped down in the corner and they head outside with Del Rio sending Edge and his bad arm into the barricade. Back in and we hit an armbar as Del Rio starts getting ready for his cross armbreaker. The bad arm is wrapped around the middle rope as you can’t argue with Del Rio’s psychology so far. Edge avoids a charge to send Alberto outside and follows with a big over the top flip dive.

Back in and Edge heads up top, only to get armdragged back down to the mat in a big crash. A big boot and flapjack get two for the champ but a Codebreaker to the arm looks to set up the armbreaker. Edge counters into the Edge-O-Matic for two but Del Rio grabs the armbreaker a few seconds later, only to have Edge roll his feet into the ropes. Del Rio follows up with a running enziguri but Edge gets his foot on the ropes again. Rodriguez tries to break it up, triggering a brawl between Christian and Brodus.

The Edgecution (impaler DDT) looks to set up the spear but Del Rio sidesteps it and Del Rio pulls the arm into the post. Now the armbreaker goes on in the middle of the ring until Edge rolls onto him for a cover, forcing Del Rio to break it up. There’s the Edgecator (a variation on the Sharpshooter) as Christian takes Brodus out. Del Rio escapes but walks into the spear (with the bad arm to no pain from Edge) to retain Edge’s title at 11:09.

Rating: C+. Good enough match but Edge not selling the arm really hurt things. If he’s not going to sell it, why waste our time watching Del Rio try to get the submission? That’s the major problem with a heel using a submission hold: almost no top face ever taps out so the finisher isn’t all that effective.

Now for the interesting part: this would be Edge’s last match due to another neck injury and the title would be vacated. If he was leaving less than a month later, why not drop the title here and put Del Rio over as a career killer? That’s never set well with me, but it did at least give us a good moment for Edge’s last win.

Post match Edge and Christian destroy Del Rio’s car. I’m sure there will be rapid legal ramifications for their actions of course. Then again, if Matt Hardy doesn’t get arrested for burning down Jeff’s house, this is pretty tame. Also you would think Del Rio would go up there to save his car or at least try to but the crowbars Edge and Christian are holding might have something to do with it.

Tough Enough ad.

Cole brags about his Slammys and promises to win tonight.

Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

This was an interesting story as Cody had been a narcissistic man who believed he was the best looking person on the roster. Then Mysterio hurt Cody’s face with the 619, forcing Cody to undergo facial reconstruction surgery. Cody returned and wore a mask to hide the horrible surgery scars. Then the mask came off to reveal that Cody looked fine but he still swore the scars were there. He kept wearing the mask and looked like Dr. Doom for a really interesting psychological character which should have taken him up the card.

Mysterio is Captain America this year and he starts hammering Cody’s ribs as Cody is still in the hard mask. Cody headbutts him down and goes for Rey’s knee brace, followed by the Disaster Kick (springboard kick to the face) for two. We hit a one arm camel clutch followed by an Alabama Slam for two more.

Cody slaps on a nerve hold as Cole continues to rip on Rey for not doing enough to make up for the injury. A delayed superplex (that’s a rare sight) drops Rey for two but he gets out of Cross Rhodes (a rolling cutter) and sends Cody to the floor. Rey sends him into the apron with a headscissors but dives into a wheelbarrow suplex for two. The 619 is broken up (Cole is thrilled) and Cody gets the knee brace off.

Rey gets two more off a moonsault press but Cody loses his mask. The 619 to the exposed face sets up the top rope splash but Rey puts the brakes on when Cody raises his knees. Rey puts Cody’s mask on for some headbutts, sending Cole into hysterics. The fans chant for Cody as the referee gets rid of the mask, leaving Cody to hit Rey in the head with the brace. Cross Rhodes finishes Rey at 12:01.

Rating: B. This was a lot better than I was expecting, even if you ignore Cole’s incessant heel commentary (we’ll come back to that later). Mysterio putting the mask on was a stupid move on his part but at least the right guy won. Cody was running with this character but unfortunately this was pretty much the peak as he became just Cody Rhodes again, which isn’t really interesting. Good match here though.

Snoop Dogg is here to scout talent for his upcoming tour so Teddy Long has set up some auditions. Snoop: “Let the dogs loose.” First up is William Regal who raps about being a heel. Regal: “Was that gangster enough for you?” Beth Phoenix and Great Khali sing Summer Lovin from Grease. Zack Ryder sings Friday (a big hit at this point) until Roddy Piper breaks a coconut over his head. Yoshi Tatsu sings We Will Rock You as Chris Masters does his pectoral dance to the beat. Hornswoggle comes in but Teddy says he can’t talk so Snoop leaves. After they’re gone, Hornswoggle raps as the Bellas dance.

Kane/Big Show/Santino Marella/Kofi Kingston vs. Corre

Corre is Justin Gabriel/Heath Slater/Wade Barrett/Ezekiel Jackson in a spiritual successor to Nexus. They’re having some success too as Slater (a country boy) and Gabriel (a high flier) are Tag Team Champions (finally with two belts between them) and Barrett (a British brawler) is Intercontinental Champion. Jackson is a very muscular powerhouse. Show has been having issues with the team as of late, Kingston lost the title to Barrett and Corre put out Santino’s partner Vladimir Kozlov. Santino and Slater start but it’s quickly off to Show to destroy Heath. Everything breaks down and Show KO’s Slater for the pin at 1:35.

Santino dances a bit, probably thrilled with getting a Wrestlemania payday for such a quick match (really the only reason for this match to exist and there’s nothing wrong with that).

The Rock is in the back with Eve Torres and lets her feel his arm. Eve describes the weekend as magical so Rock offers to make magic with the next person that comes around the corner. As you might guess, cue Mae Young who wants the people’s strudel (guess what that means). Rock makes some old age jokes (Rock: “This is Eve. Like your childhood friends Adam and Eve.”) so Eve gives him a little spank. Rock wants anyone else to come around the corner and here’s Steve Austin. It’s serious Austin tonight and they say it’s good to see each other and say they both remember. You could feel the electricity here.

We recap CM Punk vs. Randy Orton. Punk had taken over the Nexus after they threw out Wade Barrett and targeted Orton, costing him the World Title at the 2011 Royal Rumble. This was all due to Orton costing Punk his Raw World Title back in 2009, causing Punk to promise that Orton won’t be champion again on his watch. Orton took out the New Nexus one by one (in about six weeks after Cena couldn’t do it in six months).

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Orton comes in with a bad right knee after Punk hit it with a wrench. Punk dives after the leg but gets punched in the face for his efforts. They head outside where Punk dives over the steps and kicks them back into the bad knee to take over. A cross body gets two back inside but Punk stops to do Orton’s pose, earning himself a backbreaker. Something like a Stunner to the leg puts Orton right back in trouble though and Punk cannonballs down on it.

Orton gets tied up in the corner for a top rope double stomp. The GTS is countered into an RKO attempt but Punk kicks him in the face for two. Punk gets crotched on the top for a superplex but it bangs up the knee again. There’s a figure four around the post (you can’t fault Punk’s strategy here) followed by something like an Indian deathlock.

Some headbutts get Orton out and an Angle Slam gets two. The Anaconda Vice (Punk’s arm trap choke) out of nowhere has Orton in trouble until he rolls on top to make Punk break it up. The elevated DDT looks to set up the Punt but the knee gives out. Punk blocks an RKO attempt and goes up top for a clothesline, only to dive right into the RKO for the pin at 14:40.

Rating: B-. Another good match here as the first hour and a half of this show have been on a roll. Punk losing here was a surprise but it gave us the sweet RKO out of nowhere for the year. Orton was starting to get into a weird place as he was the upper midcarder on call for whatever you needed him to do. Punk would be back later in the year though so he didn’t have a lot to be worried about.

Gene Okerlund is in the back with Rock and they meet John Cena’s #1 fan: Pee Wee Herman. Rock recruits him to be a man and the payoff is Gene in Cena gear. This really isn’t funny.

No Hall of Fame video this year as they just come out. The Class of 2011 includes Abdullah the Butcher (legendary hardcore wrestler), Sunny (never likely to be mentioned again in WWE after basically going crazy), the Road Warriors (long overdue), Drew Carey (he was in the 2001 Royal Rumble), Bullet Bob Armstrong (famous Georgia wrestler), Jim Duggan (with a bowtie on the 2×4) and Shawn Michaels as the headliner, getting his own entrance.

Clip from this week’s Raw of Lawler beating up Cole’s trainer Jack Swagger. Lawler tried to go after Cole and got coffee thrown in his face.

Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole

Austin is guest referee and this is Lawler’s chance for revenge after Cole treated him like garbage for months, including costing him a Raw World Title shot. Booker T., Josh Matthews and JR will be on commentary. As he almost always did, Cole cuts off JR’s entrance to call Lawler and Ross old and fat. Swagger does his push-ups on the ramp entrance but Austin’s music and ATV cut him off.

Cole hides in the Cole Mine (his plastic box) and warms up until Austin rings the bell. Lawler takes out Swagger and Cole (showing off a lot of tattoos) immediately starts begging off. Cole offers a handshake through the box wall but Lawler doesn’t let go. Instead he pulls Cole’s head against the wall over and over before climbing in to pull Cole out (after a beating inside the box of course).

Lawler rams Cole head first into his public speaking platform (for official announcements from the anonymous Raw General Manager). Swagger gets in a cheap shot and puts on the ankle lock. Austin doesn’t see it but he counts even slower than Bruce Hart did last year. Cole bends the ankle around the bottom rope and does a very slow motion Vader Bomb from the middle rope for two. With Lawler in trouble, Cole pulls down the strap and puts on the Ancole (yes Ancole) lock.

Lawler gets out and stomps Cole down in the corner as Austin doesn’t seem interested in intervening. Swagger throws in a towel but Austin throws it back. That’s not cool with Swagger so he gets a Stunner for his troubles. Cole slaps Austin and eats a BIG right hand from Lawler, who easily pounds Cole down. The middle rope fist drop (with the real strap lowering) gets two as Lawler pulls him up. The ankle lock makes Cole tap (Austin: “DO……..YOU…….QUIT?”) at 13:45.

Rating: D. The match was bad for the most part and Cole got in WAY too much offense but the whole thing had to end with Lawler beating him definitively. I know they can’t use the piledriver but at least we got something good enough. Maybe this shuts Cole up for the night if nothing else.

Post match a lot of beer is consumed (not by Lawler, a noted non-drinker) and Booker gets in the ring for a Spinarooni for absolutely no apparent reason. Austin gives him a Stunner for coming in uninvited. Serves that rude Booker right. The celebration continues…..and we get an e-mail from the GM, saying that the decision is reversed due to Austin overstepping his bounds so Cole wins.

I know a lot of this show is poorly remembered and this is the biggest reason why. The first two hours of this show were breezing by and then this happened. You could feel the air going out of the stadium and that’s the last thing you want to do at any point and especially halfway through.

There was no logical reason for Lawler to lose here. Cole had been built up for months and was finally going to get what was coming to him. We had the moment and then he loses to keep this whole thing going for two more months, until Lawler beat Cole in a match no one remembers. This killed what the show had going and it’s going to take a miracle to recover.

Austin Stuns Matthews for making the announcement.

Wrestlemania week video.

We recap Undertaker vs. HHH which is really just the fallout from Shawn’s retirement and HHH trying to do what his best friend couldn’t. Both guys talked about how big this was but somehow avoided talking about their first Wrestlemania match. This is another match that really doesn’t need a big explanation.

JR and King are doing commentary now.

HHH vs. Undertaker

No holds barred. HHH comes out to Metallica’s For Whom the Bell Tolls with a phalanx of soldiers and battle armor. Undertaker doesn’t quite one up him with Johnny Cash’s Ain’t No Grave but it’s close. HHH punches him into the corner to start so Undertaker throws him over the top and out to the floor. A whip into the steps has HHH in early trouble and it’s already time to load up the Spanish announcers’ table, only to have HHH spear him through the Cole Mine.

That only makes Undertaker do the sit up and power glare, followed by a jumping clothesline back inside. Old School is broken up though and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The chokeslam and Pedigree are broken up, the latter with a backdrop to send HHH crashing back to the floor. Dueling chants of 19-0 and 18-1 are quickly broken up by the return of the Taker Dive and both guys are down on the floor.

It’s Undertaker up first and he sets up the steps in front of the Spanish announcers’ table, only to charge into a spinebuster through it instead. Back in and Undertaker grabs a quick chokeslam for two. The Last Ride and Pedigree are both countered, followed by Undertaker charging into a spinebuster for two. This has been a war with nothing but big bombs so far. Undertaker kicks a chair away, only to walk into a Pedigree for two.

The Last Ride and Tombstone (complete with tongue out) both get two and now it’s serious. A DDT on the chair drops Undertaker and a second Pedigree is good for another near fall. The third Pedigree gets the same so HHH massacres him with the chair, including a big shot to the head. For some reason HHH doesn’t cover so Undertaker gets up. HHH: “JUST DIE!” Undertaker grabs him by the throat but there’s nothing behind it and HHH easily shoves him away.

HHH uses a Tombstone for two and people act like it’s some huge deal. This never worked for me as I’ve seen people use that on Undertaker for years and save for Kane, IT HAS NEVER WORKED ONCE! Why is this supposed to be some big, huge deal? HHH goes to get the sledgehammer but walks into Hell’s Gate and finally taps after a ridiculous minute and forty eight seconds to give Undertaker the win at 28:54.

Rating: A-. It’s really good but the last five minutes or so where they tried to turn it into theater took a lot of it down. If HHH wanted to end him that badly, why didn’t he just cover? That and the big Tombstone spot really hurt it as it stopped making sense. This was treated as one of the best matches of all time and it’s just not at that level, especially with Punk vs. Cena coming later in the year.

That’s not to say this wasn’t an awesome match because it certainly was. These guys were just hammering each other out there and it made for some really entertaining spots. The problem for me though was I never bought the Streak as being in jeopardy. I felt that with Shawn at times but it never came here. If you don’t have that drama, you’re missing a little something. It’s a step beneath both Shawn matches, but not a long step.

19-0 flashes on the screen and both guys are done. HHH slowly gets up as the trainer comes in to check on Undertaker (thankfully in silence). Undertaker gets out of the ring and falls on his face, eventually needing to be carted up the ramp.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Miami.

Dolph Ziggler/Laycool vs. John Morrison/Trish Stratus/Snooki

Snooki is from Jersey Shore, a fad which has thankfully died down. Vickie Guerrero introduces Laycool because she’s still around. The bad guys jump our heroes from behind so Snooki slaps Dolph. McCool and Trish get us going and Trish takes over with chops, including one with Snooki licking her hand for good luck. An early Faithbreaker attempt is countered with a facebuster and a big Chick Kick gets two. The guys come in and Morrison knocks Ziggler to the floor for Starship Pain (split legged corkscrew moonsault). Snooki comes in with a handspring elbow into the corner followed by a splash to pin McCool at 4:16.

Rating: D. This was your lame celebrity match of the year but at least they kept it short and didn’t do anything too bad. They didn’t try to do anything too complicated or big here, even though the show really didn’t need anything else packed into this. Trish hadn’t lost a step either.

The new attendance record is announced. Notice that they said for any entertainment event, which excludes football.

We see someone watching videos jumping back and forth between wrestling legends and Miz on the Real World and his rise up the WWE card from joke to World Champion. The song playing talks about how someone isn’t stopping even if everyone hates him. This is really, really good stuff and a great middle finger to all of Miz’s detractors. The problem for Miz is the shadow of the Rock over this entire thing which no one was going to be able to shake. Cena won an Elimination Chamber to earn this shot.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging. Miz and his crony Alex Riley walk through balloons spelling out “AWESOME!”. Cena’s big entrance involves a gospel choir and a man saying a prayer talking about how Cena is here to do good work and that he wished he had more than one life to do it. Cena might actually be booed louder than Miz. Feeling out process to start with Cena getting dropped off a shoulder but coming back with a hiptoss.

Miz takes over in the corner and whips Cena hard across the ring, setting up his running clothesline for two. A gutwrench suplex gets the same for Cena as the crowd is just silent. Miz misses the second running corner clothesline and takes the top rope Fameasser for two. The champ slowly stomps him down and a baseball slide sends Cena out to the floor. Back in and a knee lift gets two as Cena has shown no fire so far.

Cena fights back with some of his normal stuff including the Shuffle but the AA is countered into a low DDT for two more. Miz goes over and rips off a turnbuckle pad but we’re not ready for that yet. Instead Miz has to counter another AA so Cena takes him down into the STF, sending Miz crawling for the ropes. Back up and Miz sends him into the buckle, setting up the Skull Crushing Finale (full nelson faceplant) for two.

There goes the referee (of course) and Cena hits the AA (to silence, as the fans aren’t that stupid) for no count. Riley sneaks in with a metal briefcase shot to the face for two and now the fans are waking up. Now it’s Miz trying his own briefcase shot but it hits Riley by mistake, followed by one of the biggest AA’s of all time for a very close two (and the fans applaud). Miz heads outside so Cena spears him over the barricade (legitimately giving Miz a concussion)…..and that’s a double countout at 14:43.

Rating: D-. The last few minutes got better but this was AWFUL otherwise as the fans were sitting there in silence. Miz had a great build to this match but that didn’t mean he was ready for the main event of Wrestlemania. Also, A DOUBLE COUNTOUT? That’s dull on Raw and they try it here?

Never mind maybe because here’s the Rock. Before he can say anything, we get an e-mail from the GM. Rock reads the message but decides it doesn’t matter what the GM thinks. Wrestlemania isn’t ending like this so let’s keep going with No DQ. The bell rings and Cena takes a Rock Bottom, giving Miz the pin to retain about 40 seconds after the restart.

Miz goes after Rock for no logical reason so Rock lays him out and drops the People’s Elbow. A lot of posing and four minutes of highlights end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. It’s amazing how much two matches can destroy an otherwise solid show but that main event and the Lawler decision being reversed crushed this thing into the ground. Aside from those two matches, this is actually a heck of a show with nothing really bad (aside from the mixed tag which was kept short). Those two bad matches are devastating though and the ending left a REALLY bad taste in a lot of people’s mouths, which I can easily understand.

The other major issue is the Rock, who loomed over the entire thing. That opening monologue was something a 16 year old could have written and after the thing with Austin, he pretty much disappeared. The ending sets up more down the road, but that doesn’t make for a good way to close out the show. It’s not the worst show ever but those two holes are way too much to overcome.

Ratings Comparison

Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B

Corre vs. Kane/Santino Marella/Kofi Kingston/Big Show

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

Michael Cole vs. Jerry Lawler

Original: C

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. HHH

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: A-

Snooki/Trish Stratus/John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler/Laycool

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Miz vs. John Cena

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: C-

That HHH vs. Undertaker match really is great.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/wrestlemania-27-not-sure-on-this-one/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/05/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvii-rocky-cant-save-this-one/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XXVII
Date: April 3, 2011
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 71,617
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Josh Matthews

This is the Rock’s show as he’s back to be guest host. Really that’s all you need to know here because it’s all that matters. We’ve also got Cena vs. Miz for the Raw Title, which is basically a backdrop for the obvious Rock and Cena interaction. For the blue guys we’ve got Del Rio challenging Edge for the title and Undertaker’s opponent is Shawn’s heterosexual life partner HHH. Oh and there’s no MITB this year thank goodness. Let’s get to it.

Keri Hilson sings America the Beautiful. I’m not sure who she is but I like her voice far better than Fantasia’s from last year.

The opening video sounds like the opening to a late night talk show, but it leads to ROCKY, which makes it all better. He does the long walk down the long ramp to get to the ring and the place goes nuts for him. Rock starts off with the FINALLY line after walking around the ring for a bit. He asks if we can feel, taste and smell the electricity. We get a pretty lame “I say Wrestle, you say Mania” bit with the crowd and Rock has goosebumps.

As for the wrestlers here tonight, there’s one in particular sitting in the back trying to decide which Fruity Pebbles shirt to wear to the ring tonight. We get the required Fruity Pebbles chant as Rock keeps stalling. Before continuing, Rock has to have some of the People’s Water (his words not mine). Now when he says Yabba, the people say Dabba. If it’s not clear by now, he has no idea what to say here for the most part.

Rock lists off all of his own nicknames to say he’s hosting while rhyming a bit (“Always defiant and standing taller than Andre the Giant”) before saying that IF YA SMELL belongs to the people. Everyone says it with him and that’s finally that. This was six minutes long and had about enough material to fill in a third of that.

We get the usual Wrestlemania through history video to show how important it’s been over the last 27 years.

Cole, a heel here, says this is the fabric of Americana. That’s a bit of a stretch I’d think.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Edge

Del Rio is challenging and comes out in a Rolls Royce. The video screen is made to look like a driveway for Del Rio to be driving from in a cool sight. Also at ringside is Del Rio’s bodyguard Brodus Clay. Does anyone even remember that association? Christian is of course here to second Edge. Alberto sends him into the corner to start but Edge comes back with some hard slaps. A backdrop puts Alberto down and a second one puts him on the floor.

Back in and Del Rio grabs an armbar to take over, only to be armdragged down. Alberto goes right back to the arm as Brodus talks trash. Back to the armbar but Del Rio misses a charge and falls out to the floor. Edge dives off the top to take Del Rio down again and we head back inside. The champion heads to the top but Alberto pulls him down with a top rope armdrag for two. Edge comes back with a big boot to get himself a breather but he can’t follow up.

A running forearm puts Del Rio down again and a flapjack gets two. Alberto grabs a Codebreaker to the arm but the cross armbreaker is countered into an Edge-O-Matic for two. Del Rio rolls through a rollup and grabs the armbreaker but Edge gets his feet on the ropes to quickly escape. Edge snaps Alberto’s neck on the top rope but as he goes up top, Del Rio hits the enziguri in the corner for two.

Brodus and Christian get in a fight on the floor but Del Rio kicks Christian down. There’s the Edgecution to set up the spear but it hits post instead. The armbreaker goes on but Edge keeps his hands together….for a minute before Alberto gets the hold on full. Edge gets on top of Alberto to break it up and there’s the Edgecator (modified Sharpshooter) but Del Rio rolls away. Not that it matters as Edge pops up and hits the spear to retain.

Rating: C+. For a world title match at Wrestlemania, this was a disappointment. For Edge’s last match because his neck was REALLY messed up, this was pretty decent stuff. Edge would retire a few days later and vacate the title, which says to me that he should have put Del Rio over here. At the end of the day it makes Alberto look weak to lose to a guy that banged up but it did give Edge a good moment to go out on. Nothing great though.

Post match Edge beats up Del Rio’s car and Alberto….lets him. Christian provides a pipe and the real beating of the car begins. This had to happen sooner or later. Cole brings up a good point: “Someone should arrest them.” True actually, but then again Orton didn’t get arrested for trying to blow up John Cena, so this is minor by comparison.

Tough Enough is coming. That show was awesome.

Cole taunts Lawler a bit before their match later.

Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

Cody used to be Dashing but then Rey hit him with the 619 and the knee brace hit Cody in the face, scarring him and requiring facial surgery. Cody basically became Dr. Doom but in reality his face was fine. However he wanted Rey’s mask for retribution. This was an AWESOME character but of course WWE would wind up wasting the entire thing and make Cody a jobber because they got bored with him after a few months. Still though, this part was awesome.

Oh yeah the match. Rey comes out as Captain America this year which is an awesome looking costume for him. Rey is almost immediately sent to the apron but comes in off the top with a dropkick to take over. A forearm to Rey’s face takes over and Cody goes after the knee brace which caused the initial injury. Rey kicks his way out of the corner but Cody headbutts him in the face to take over again because of the hard mask.

The Disaster Kick to the head puts Rey down again and it’s off to a chinlock. Cody charges into a boot in the corner but comes right back with the Alabama Slam for two. Back to the knee brace for a second before Cody hits a running knee to the back of Rey’s head to keep him down. Mysterio is sent to the apron again and goes up top, only to be sent down in a delayed superplex. Cody stomps away and talks about how Rey hurt his face.

Rey escapes Cross Rhodes and sends Cody out to the floor for a baseball slide to the face. A headscissors sends Cody into the apron and we head back inside to speed things up. Rey hooks a quick quick rollup for two and fires off a kick to the face. Cody charges into a kick to the ribs but comes back with a release German suplex for two. A springboard headscissors puts Cody down but the 619 is caught in mid kick. Cody slingshots Rey’s throat into the middle rope for two more and now the knee brace is removed.

Rey comes right back with a moonsault press for two of his own and Cody loses his mask. The 619 hits and a hard kick to Cody’s head gets two more. Now Mysterio puts Cody’s mask on and hits a few headbutts with it before hitting a top rope headbutt to the chest for two. Cody rolls to the floor and sneaks in a shot to the face with the knee brace, followed up by Cross Rhodes for the upset pin.

Rating: B-. Good match here and pretty easily Cody’s biggest win ever to this point. Cody needed this win a lot more than Mysterio and it made him even more awesome than he already was before this match. Mysterio had nothing to gain here and it was a pleasant sight to see the hotter star go over like that.

We go to the back for our comedy segment of the night. Teddy is in the back with Snoop Dog for a talent search. First up we have William Regal dropping some rhymes on us. Snoop says it’s not gangster enough for him. Here are Khali and Beth Phoenix to sing Summer Loving from Grease. It would have been better as Natalya but still not bad. Finally we have Ryder singing Friday (now THERE’S a dated joke), only to be blasted with a chair by Piper. Snoop is….pleased? Masters does his pec dance to We Will Rock You with Yoshi Tatsu providing vocals. Horny raps and we have a winner. The Bellas come in to dance too.

Corre vs. Big Show/Kane/Kofi Kingston/Santino Marella

Corre is the sequel to Nexus and is made up of Barrett/Slater/Gabriel/Jackson. Barrett is IC Champion and Slater/Gabriel are tag champions. Santino and Slater start things off but after a quick hiptoss from Marella here’s Big Show. Matthews: “He’s certainly not unorthodox.” Yeah actually he is, given how big he is. Everything breaks down and Kofi kicks Barrett’s head off. In all the calamity, Santino Cobras Slater into the WMD for the pin in just over 90 seconds. This would be the replacement for MITB for the Mania payday.

Rock kind of hits on Eve Torres in the back. But enough of that as Rock says he can make magic with anyone that comes around the corner. I called this one before it happened live: Mae Young pops up and says she wants the People’s Strudel. Rock suggests the Moses variety instead and makes various other old people jokes. Mae smack’s Rock’s pants and leaves so Rock can say he wishes that was ANYONE else.

He turns around and locks eyes with Steve Austin. They look at each other and say it’s good to see each other with Rock asking if Austin remembers. Austin says he does and they shake hands. This wasn’t a funny moment but one of those where you could actually feel the intensity. Also to brag a bit, I called both of those appearances before they happened live.

We recap Randy Orton vs. CM Punk. Back in 2008, Orton cost Punk the title for no apparent reason by keeping him out of the Championship Scramble at Unforgiven. Two and a half years later, Punk jumped Orton and said he was doing this as revenge for Orton costing him that shot. Punk had since taken over the Nexus and sent them after Orton, who took them out one by one in a few weeks (Note that Cena spent six months fighting them and took out one guy while Orton took out about five in as many weeks). Tonight is the showdown.

Randy Orton vs. CM Punk

The cylinder from last year is now a cube which still has the videos playing on them. Orton immediately takes it to the floor and pounds away, but Punk jumps over the steps and kicks them into Orton’s knees. Back in and Orton stays on the knees for a quick two count. Punk of course mocks the knee injury before stomping at the legs even more. Randy grabs a quick backbreaker but Punk comes back with a kind of Stunner to the leg for two.

Punk hits the running knee in the corner but Orton falls down before he can hit the bulldog. The straightedge one stays on the knee and puts Orton in the Tree of Woe. In a cool bit, Orton tries to pull himself up but Punk drops a top rope knee to take Randy right back down. The GTS is countered but Punk breaks up the RKO with a high kick for two. Punk loads up the Macho Elbow but Orton crotches him down instead. A superplex puts Punk down but the cover is very delayed and only gets two.

Punk wraps the knee around the post a few times and Orton is in big trouble. Off to a modified Indian deathlock for a bit but Orton fights back and slugs Punk down to take over. Punk comes back with a basic kick to the knee and there’s the Anaconda Vice. Orton rolls over and the fans never once seemed nervous about a tap out. CM heads out to the apron and is rammed into the post, followed by the Elevated DDT. Orton loads up the Punt but the knee gives out. Punk heads to the outside and loads up the springboard clothesline but dives right into the RKO for the pin by Randy.

Rating: B. Good solid match here which should have been the end of the feud, but since this is WWE, there was a gimmick rematch the next month because that’s how WWE books feuds. You know, because WRESTLEMANIA isn’t good enough to end a story at. Anyway, very good match here between two guys with solid chemistry together.

The Rock and Gene Okerlund are in the back and they meet John Cena’s #1 fan: Pee Wee Herman. He’s not my kind of comedy but Rock recruits him to Team Bring It. Gene calls Herman a tool.

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Hall of Fame time. The class of 2011: Abdullah the Butcher, Sunny, Road Warriors, Drew Carey, Bob Armstrong, Jim Duggan (with bowtie on the 2×4) and……that Shawn Michaels guy.

Here’s a Wrestlemania Recall from….Monday night? It’s Lawler and Swagger, Cole’s trainer for his match tonight, brawling.

We don’t bother recapping Cole vs. Lawler, but basically Cole has been heel since November and even cost Jerry the WWE Title a few months ago. After months and months, tonight is Lawler’s revenge. Swagger has been training Cole and Austin is guest referee. Booker and JR come out to do commentary with Josh.

Cole comes out in a Syracuse hoodie and headgear to match. He makes fun of JR for being fat and Lawler for having a big ego. This is going to be Lawler’s first Wrestlemania match.

Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole

Austin rides out on his ATV and sends Cole into his plastic cube. Cole warms up in his cube as Lawler and Austin wait in the ring. Austin rings the bell and Lawler goes right for Michael. He has to punch Swagger out first and sends him into the barricade for good measure. Cole begs for mercy and reaches his hand through the hole in the cube for a handshake, only to be pulled face first into the wall. Lawler climbs in and pounds away before bringing Cole out into the open.

Swagger interferes again and Cole gets a breather before actually hitting a baseball slide. Jack puts on the ankle lock as Cole is in control here. Back in and Michael works on the ankle some more as he’s actually maintaining control. Cole loads up a Vader Bomb but can only do it off the bottom rope for two. It’s remarkable that a former world champion is in this much trouble after a few shots by an announcer isn’t it?

Cole starts going after the ankle again as we’re somehow EIGHT MINUTES into this. The crowd chants boring and they’re absolutely right. Cole takes down a strap and puts on the An-Cole (yes that’s what it’s called) Lock but Lawler easily breaks it. After nine minutes plus, Jerry FINALLY comes back and starts pounding away. Swagger throws in a towel but Austin wipes his head with it and throws it back. Jack gets in the ring and is Stunned for his efforts.

Now Cole gets in Austin’s face but walks into a right hand from Jerry as the real beating begins. There’s a dropkick for good measure to put Cole down and it’s time for the middle rope punch, complete with a point to the sign and the peeling down of the strap. Jerry covers him but pulls it up at two. Lawler puts on the ankle lock and Cole immediately tabs. Austin asks if he gives up veeeeeeeeeery slowly. Cole: “YES YES I GIVE UP I GIVE UP!” Austin: “ARE YOU SURE!” The bell finally rings and we’re done.

Rating: D-. Oh this was terrible. This ran THIRTEEN AND A HALF MINUTES with Lawler getting beaten up for nearly ten of that. This should have been five minutes long with Lawler not even breaking a sweat. I can live with the lack of a piledriver for company rules, but the fist should have ended it rather than the ankle lock. At least it couldn’t get worse though.

Swagger carries Cole out and it’s time to drink. Booker comes in for no apparent reason and Lawler (a notorious non-drinker) has a chance to drop his beers. We get a Spinarooni and Booker gets a Stunner for stealing the spotlight.

And then it happens.

We get an e-mail from the Anonymous Raw GM, saying that since Austin got physical, the decision is reversed and Cole wins by DQ. If there has EVER been a dumber idea in wrestling history, I have no idea what it is. Lawler would get the win TWO MONTHS LATER and the GM would eventually be revealed to be Hornswoggle of all people. This is just so stupid. Austin gives Josh, the messenger, the Stunner for good measure. Also to keep the people from booing this out of the building anymore than they already are.

We get a video on Wrestlemania week.

We recap HHH Undertaker. In short, Shawn couldn’t do it the last two years, so now it’s HHH’s turn to try. Both guys talked about how big this was and how awesome they were and it’s no holds barred for no real apparent reason.

HHH vs. Undertaker

HHH comes out with a phalanx of soldiers, in battle gear and to a LONG version of For Whom the Bell Tolls by Metallica. Does it make up for the Thor entrance? No, but it’s pretty awesome. Taker comes out to Ain’t No Grave Can Hold My Body Down (or whatever its name is) by Johnny Cash. HHH pounds him into the corner to start but gets launched over the top rope for his efforts. The Game fires off more right hands but gets sent into the steps to break the momentum again.

HHH comes back by spearing him into the Cole Mine (JR and King are doing commentary now) but Taker sits up with ease. Back in and Taker hits the jumping clothesline but Old School is countered. A clothesline puts Taker onto the floor and HHH whips him into the barricade for good measure. HHH loads up the announce table but the Pedigree attempt is countered by a backdrop to the floor.

Taker goes back inside and busts out the Taker Dive for good measure. Thankfully this time he had HHH there to catch him. The steps are placed in front of the other table and Taker charges at HHH, only to be caught in the spinebuster through the table to put both guys down again. Back in and HHH walks into a chokeslam for a close two. HHH drives Taker into the corner and starts pounding away, only to get caught in the Last Ride ala Wrestlemania 17. He escapes this time though, only to have his Pedigree attempt countered. Snake Eyes connects but the big boot is countered into another spinebuster.

HHH brings in a chair but gets kicked in the face to give Taker the chair. The Game absorbs a shot to the back and grabs a quick Pedigree for two. Triple H pounds away in the corner again and now the Last Ride connects for two. The Tombstone also hits for two and Taker is getting frustrated. As he picks up HHH, the Game comes back with a DDT onto the chair for no cover. Both guys slowly fight to their feet and there’s another Pedigree and a VERY slow count for two.

A third Pedigree hits and the crowd is barely popping anymore on these kickouts as we’re reaching the point of ridiculousness. HHH blasts him in the back with the chair eight times but he’s too gassed to follow up. A ninth cracks Undertaker in the head and the Dead Man is in trouble. There are about 45 seconds of nothing in between these shots by the way. Taker can’t sit up so HHH yells at him to stay down. A chokeslam attempt is easily shrugged off but Taker gets to his feet in the corner.

HHH tombstones Undertaker but even with the tongue out it only gets two. Again, if your name isn’t Kane, THAT DOESN’T WORK. HHH goes to the floor and gets the sledgehammer but walks into the Hell’s Gate. He drops the hammer but the hold is locked on tight. HHH starts to pass out but gets the hammer again. Then he drops it again and HHH taps out to make Undertaker 19-0.

Rating: B. I’m pretty sure that’s what I gave it live and it barely holds up to that level now. At the end of the day, this was treated like a match where Taker was beaten down so much that he couldn’t possibly come back. The problem with the match is exactly that: it only felt like a match designed to be as one sided as possible for him to make the comeback. Think of it like the Aristocrats joke: take it as far as you can go and then get to the surprise ending. As mentioned, the fans didn’t even react to the near falls by the end. It also didn’t feel natural at all, much like the two Shawn matches. Good, but definitely not great.

Taker is carted out, which was the inspiration for the rematch, as HHH made it sound like he won the match.

Wrestlemania next year is in Miami.

John Morrison/Snooki/Trish Stratus vs. Laycool/Dolph Ziggler

Barely any story here as it’s just there to give us Snooki, which is supposed to mean something. Vickie is with Laycool here because she’s already screwing Dolph at this point. Trish is STUNNING as a brunette here too. Laycool attacks to start and the guys get involved as well. Michelle shoves Layla to start so Trish comes in and beats Michelle up. The Matrish is broken up with a stomp but Trish escapes the Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) with a facebuster.

Michelle and Stratus slug it out on the top before falling to the floor at the same time. Layla tries to interfere and gets decked as well, only to have Trish dive off the apron and take both of them out. The Chick Kick gets two on Michelle as the guys come in sans tags. Starship Pain to the floor takes Ziggy out and there’s the tag to Snooki for a handspring elbow to Michelle. That and a splash are good for the pin.

Rating: D+. Trish and Laycool looked hot, Snooki did her two moves decently enough, the guys did almost nothing at all and Vickie was kept to a minimum in the less than three and a half minutes this ran. For a match that short with Trish looking that good, how much can you really complain here? Laycool would be split in a month with Michelle leaving the company.

The new attendance record is 71,617. Woot.

Do you need a recap of Cena vs. Miz? Miz is champion and it’s Cena at Wrestlemania.

Anyway we do get a video of Miz’s rise from MTV to Wrestlemania main event, cut in with great Wrestlemania moments. I’ll give them this: Miz’s rise from total joke to what he became is nothing short of remarkable. How Cena got the shot isn’t even mentioned here. I think he won the Chamber match.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. The Miz

Miz, complete with the SWEET coat, comes out through a set of balloons spelling out the word AWESOME. Oh and Alex Riley is here too. Cena has a full on gospel choir to sing him to the ring. That’s rather awesome. We get a prayer set to a Cena career video. If nothing else, this lets us see a gospel choir singing “Your time is up, my time is now.” It gets booed out of the building, but it does exist.

Feeling out process to start with Miz being taken down by a headlock. Miz grabs a headlock of his own but gets thrown down yet again. A test of strength is teased but Cena grabs another headlock instead. Not much to see yet. Miz fights into the corner and stomps away before hitting the corner clothesline for two. Matt Hardy’s Side Effect gets two more as we’re firmly in first gear here. Another corner clothesline misses and Cena comes back with a regular clothesline for two.

A big boot to the head gets two for Miz as the crowd continues to be dead silent for this. Cena misses a….cross body I think and falls to the apron. A Million Dollar Kneelift gets two for the champion but the Skull Crushing Finale is reversed and Cena fires off the shoulder blocks. The finishing sequence continues but Miz escapes the AA into a low DDT for two. Miz escapes the STF and hits the Reality Check for two more. The champion removes a buckle pad and as the referee puts it back on, Cena gets an unseen small package for two.

Another AA attempt is blocked with Miz grabbing the top rope. Instead it’s the STF but Miz quickly gets to the rope. Riley gets on the apron and the distraction is enough to send Cena into the buckle (apparently the referee is a bad repairman) and the Skull Crushing Finale gets two. Another Finale is reversed and the referee is bumped. The AA (ZERO pop) hits but there’s no one to count. Riley comes in with a briefcase shot to the head which gets another two on Cena.

Alex tries to come in again but Miz’s case shot takes him out by mistake. A BIG release AA hits again but Miz kicks out at two. They head outside and Cena clotheslines Miz over the barricade into the timekeeper’s area. Miz tries to get up and Cena spears him down, sending Miz’s head HARD into the concrete. I’ve heard Miz say that gave him a concussion and as a result he doesn’t remember a thing about this match. It looked TERRIBLE too, and it actually ends the match, as in the MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA, in a double countout.

Rating: D-. The second half of this match got WAY better than the first, but the problem is it’s a fifteen minute match and the first seven or so are ridiculously boring. On top of that, did I mention it was a DOUBLE COUNTOUT IN THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA??? The only good thing here was Miz kicking out of the AA in the middle of the ring. That’s how you make a guy look good. The rest of the match however is how you make someone look HORRIBLE, much like the match. Terrible stuff here as Miz wasn’t ready for this, which is what almost everyone thought would happen.

Oh wait here’s Rock, who apparently has match making powers as host (why he didn’t change the Lawler/Cole match earlier is anyone’s guess). After ignoring another e-mail, he restarts this under No DQ rules. The bell rings, Cena can’t hit the AA, Rock hits the Rock Bottom on Cena, Miz retains.

Post match Rock beats up Miz to a very limited reaction and it’s the People’s Elbow to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Back in 2011 when I first watched this, I said out loud “What did I just watch?” That’s the same thing I’m wondering now, because this was terrible. Taker vs. HHH and Orton vs. Punk are both solid matches, but other than that this might as well have been Over the Limit instead of Wrestlemania. Basically this was there to set up the next edition of the show, which is pretty much a big screw you to the fans. Nothing to see here other than MAYBE HHH vs. Undertaker, but other than that there’s nothing of quality going on. One interesting note though: this is the only Mania ever with no title changes.

Ratings Comparison

Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Cody Rhodes vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B

Redo: B-

Corre vs. Kane/Santino Marella/Kofi Kingston/Big Show

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

CM Punk vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: B

Michael Cole vs. Jerry Lawler

Original: C

Redo: D-

Undertaker vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: B

Snooki/Trish Stratus/John Morrison vs. Dolph Ziggler/Laycool

Original: N/A

Redo: D+

Miz vs. John Cena

Original: C-

Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

Oh man was I too nice to this show back in the day.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/wrestlemania-27-not-sure-on-this-one/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6