HIDDEN GEM: Before She Was Famous

I love little surprises like this one.

Starla Sexton vs. Malia Hosaka
Date: December 21 , 1998
Location: Universal Studios Florida, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Lee Marshall, Mike Tenay

This is from WCW Worldwide, which is about as low as it got on the WCW ladder (though it ran uninterrupted from 1975 until 2001 and was the final WCW show to ever air). Sexton is better known as Molly Holly and has barely been wrestling a year at this point. Hosaka gets the ever present standard Japanese music and apparently just had a kid a few months ago.

Sexton flips out of a top wristlock and slaps on a quickly broken armbar. Hosaka chokes with the knee and then the boot before stopping to kick at the leg. The legdrop between the legs (ala Jeff Hardy) lets Hosaka choke even more but she misses a crossbody. A gutwrench suplex gives Sexton one but she gets caught in a reverse DDT. Back up and Sexton grabs a quick victory roll for the fast pin at 4:36.

Rating: C. You could see the talent in both of them and my eyebrows popped up at the surprise finish. I would not have bet on Sexton pulling it off but it was so strange to see women having a normal, even good at times, match in WCW. You don’t see that very often and it worked well here. Not a great match, but compared to what women usually did in WCW, this was a masterpiece.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1998 (2013 Redo): Highway To Censored

Summerslam 1998
Date: August 30, 1998
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 21,588
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Venis misses a splash and gets caught in a belly to back suplex to give Brown control again. Val comes back with an overhead t-bone suplex but walks into a clothesline followed by a legdrop for two. A leg lariat and a middle rope elbow gets the same and Val is holding his back for some reason. Brown follows up on the injury with a Texas Cloverleaf but lets it go after only a few seconds. Did he learn submissions from No Mercy? Brown misses a middle rope senton and both guys are down. The fans are much more into this than you would expect them to be.

Val hits some running knees to the ribs and a backdrop for no cover. He tries a high cross body but gets caught in a Sky High (lifting powerbomb) which gets a delayed two count. Brown hits a quick DDT but dives off the middle rope into a powerslam for two. A butterfly suplex sets up the Money Shot (top rope splash) but Brown gets his knees up.

Val slams the referee and hits a Money Shot.

Mankind is mad that Austin broke the hearse (“I have to take it to the Brisco Brothers Body Shop.”) because he wanted to put Kane in it later tonight. Mankind has a sledge hammer and wants to use it on someone.

Insane Clown Posse plays the Oddities to the ring to a HUGE reaction.

Oddities vs. Kaientai

Two members of the team combine to slam him and four straight top rope splashes followed by four straight legdrops get no cover. A quadruple dropkick has Golga in trouble but a quadruple clothesline puts Kaientai down. The hot tag brings in Kurrgan who takes down everyone in sight and hits a wicked side slam on Funaki. Everything breaks down as managers Luna Vachon and Yamaguchi-San get in a fight. A quadruple chokeslam is good for the pin by Golga on everyone from Japan.

Jeff Jarrett vs. X-Pac

A Jarrett leapfrog is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two and Howard is starting to panic. Another Bronco Buster attempt is countered by a low blow but Jarrett stops to hit the Fink, allowing the X Factor to connect for a VERY close two. Southern Justice is back but Dennis Knight (Phineas) drops a guitar, giving Pac the shot to Jarrett for the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but it went a bit too long for what they were trying to do. If Southern Justice could come out at the end, where were they for the other ten minutes of the match? The haircut was the move that Jarrett needed as he changed his entire character from Tennessee Guy to chauvinist pig soon after this.

Jacqueline/Marc Mero vs. Sable/???

This is the final blowoff of the long Mero vs. Sable feud. The mystery partner is Edge who has only been around for a month or so at this time. The guys start things off with Edge hitting some quick Japanese armdrags. Off to Jackie who demands Sable come in but runs off to Mero as soon as the blonde comes in. Edge hits a quick flapjack but Jackie trips him up to give Mero a free shot.

Rating: C-. The match kind of sucked but Sable was WAY over. You have to remember how big of a deal she was back then to keep this in context. Sable was the final thing you would see on Raw a lot of the time, much like Cena is today. The biggest problem I still have with this match is what JR says at the end: “SHE DID IT!” This was all about Sable and Edge, the guy they were trying to rub, could have been any other guy.

Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

Hart comes right back with a powerslam and a belly to belly sets up the Sharpshooter. In an awesome counter, Shamrock crawls over to the cage and pulls himself up the wall to escape the hold. A tornado DDT off the wall puts Owen down and a spinwheel kick does the same. Owen sends him into the cage and tries a dragon sleeper but Shamrock walks up the cage to backflip out and the ankle lock gets the submission.

Austin is ready.

Tag Titles: Mankind vs. New Age Outlaws

Mankind and Kane are the champions but as mentioned Kane is missing. This is no holds barred and falls count anywhere, making this a hardcore match. The Outlaws are ridiculously over and Mankind is approaching his face turn if not almost already there. Billy and Roadie bring a dumpster to the ring but Mankind meets them with the cookie sheet. He and Billy both get chairs and Mankind wins a quick duel but the numbers game catches up with him.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. HHH

The champion starts his climb but HHH flies in off the top to break it up, but the ladder falls on him to keep both guys down. A hard ladder shot puts Rock down again and HHH drives the top of the ladder into his ribs. Rock pulls HHH off the ladder and the future Game lands on his knee, legitimately injuring it and requiring several months off to heal up. Some elbows to the knee make the pain even worse but the ladder being dropped on it is far more painful.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Steve Austin

Kane pops up at the entrance but Undertaker tells him to go back. The brawl keeps going but Austin goes to the floor to make sure Kane is gone. A somewhat sloppy chokeslam brings Austin back in but he clotheslines Taker to the floor. They fight into the crowd with Taker backdropping Austin onto the concrete. Back to ringside with Austin being rammed back first into the post, making JR scream that Austin may be paralyzed. That would be two years in a row if true.

Post match Taker hands Austin the belt and walks away to stand next to Kane in the entrance.

Ratings Comparison

Original: B

Redo: C+

Oddities vs. Kaientai

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Jeff Jarrett vs. X-Pac

Original: B

Redo: C

Marc Mero/Jacqueline vs. Sable/Edge

Original: F

Redo: C-

Ken Shamrock vs. Owen Hart

Original: B-

Redo: B

Mankind vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D+

HHH vs. The Rock

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Steve Austin vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: A-

Most of the matches are rated higher and the overall rating is lower. Sounds like one of my old reviews.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/01/history-of-summerslam-count-up-1998-the-biggest-summerslam-ever/




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 1998 (Original): This Year’s Wrestlemania

Summerslam 1998
Date: August 30, 1998
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 21,588
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

If there has ever been a Summerslam that could be put on par with Wrestlemania as far as build up and importance goes, this is it. The Attitude Era of 1998 was going full speed ahead with nothing in sight stop it as Austin vs. McMahon was dominating the wrestling world. The idea is that there was a conspiracy led by Vince to get the title off of Austin. The reason you had to see every show was no one knew who else was in on it.

That’s just downright creepy if you can ignore the fact that it’s professional wrestling. The main enemy of Austin was Undertaker, so guess what tonight’s main event is? This show was the crescendo of the summer and is exactly what a Summerslam is supposed to be like in my eyes. Every storyline was heavily built up, the showdowns were worth drooling over, and it’s in Madison freaking Square Garden.

Also, this show has some historical significance, as it was on this night that HHH and Rock launched themselves into the highest level of the company. For the better part of a year DX and the Nation had been feuding. However this was really just window dressing for Rock vs. HHH, and tonight was the final match in the feud: Rock defending the IC title against HHH in a ladder match. I’ve been looking forward to this match since I started this review as it’s one of my favorite matches ever. I’m going to call this the Milenko Special for something that comes in the second match. I’m actually looking forward to this, so let’s do it.

The buildup is perfect now and it just looks awesome. Excellent work here and it makes it look like a big time show.That wasn’t the intro, so we get this one. Basically Taker and Kane are together and Austin isn’t surprised, but he’s not afraid. What kind of a face would he be if he was? Vince says that Taker has to have Kane there with him to make sure he wins. Remember that line. The video cuts off really abruptly for some reason and it doesn’t go well. This is the home video so AC DC is edited out. Ross and Lawler are here and run down the card of course.

European Title: Val Venis vs. D’Lo Brown

Apparently Austin broke a hearse that either of the Brothers could have been in. The name graphic for Val is placed perfectly as it covers his crotch as he’s gyrating and taking off the towel. He says he’s in the big apple and does his came, saw, came again line. As he’s doing this they cut to a gorgeous woman in the front row that is jaw dropping. Brown is billed from Helsinki after having been from Lisbon on Raw.

The announcer’s voice when he reads Helsinki is great as if he sounds like he’s thinking what in the world is wrong with my eyes? They keep talking about the hearse. This was back when Heat meant something. They need to bring it back as a preshow. At the time Brown was using the chest protector like Orton used the cast. He got injured about two months before but it’s a slow healing injury I guess. We go to a random shot of the crowd but the camera zooms in on someone.

It’s some guy in an open shirt and sunglasses with long blonde hair. His name is cliff or rock or something. Oh Edge, yeah that’s it. I’m sure he’ll never amount to anything. Back to the next big things, Val Venis and D’Lo Brown. Oh I forgot to mention the entrance. It’s the kind where when you look at the ring the entrance is straight ahead and it’s designed to look like gates.

Again, that’s just awesome looking as this show is being treated like a mega show and it’s paying off. Brown busts out a Texas Cloverleaf which oddly doesn’t get a bad Europe joke. A lot of the sound bites here are used in one of the Smackdown video games. Val goes up for…something and gets caught in the Sky High which is awesome but unnamed at this point. This is a good match so far which isn’t something you’d expect out of these two.

We have some solid chemistry here actually. Val really was good in the ring, at least better than he’s given credit for. He keeps going up top but it’s never in the right position for the splash. He finally gets one off but Brown gets the knees up. Crowd is marking hard for Brown actually. Correction they think he sucks. Could we possibly have dueling chants? We have more sex jokes from Lawler that are really under the radar if you don’t know what to listen for.

SWEET looking Low Down from Brown but it misses. Eventually Val steals the chest protector and goes for the splash but the referee tries to stop him and he gets crotched. Brown gets it back but Venis beats him up before putting it on again. Referee tries to stop him but he gets fired across the ring for the stupid DQ finish. Post match, the referee gets beaten on.

Rating: B. Very good match here, but the ending is just weak to me. I get that they didn’t want to do the title change but wanted Val to look strong, but they couldn’t do a count out or something? The referee thing was just stupid and it didn’t work for me. Either way, this was a great opener and it worked very well. Sometimes you find guys like these two that just work well together. When you find something like that, it’s a bonus.

Cole is in the back with the hearse as we find out that Kane and Taker weren’t in the hearse, but Mankind isn’t happy. He brought it apparently, and now it’s only good for giving the Brisco Brothers Body Shop some work. He also has a sledgehammer, which I guess HHH stole from him.

Oddities vs. Kai En Tai

This is a handicap match, because I guess three giants against four tiny men isn’t fair? Anyway, ICP plays the Oddities to the ring which actually gets a very nice reaction. They get all the fans waving their hands, including one scantily clad woman that needs to be dancing more. Apparently the Japanese team doesn’t like the Oddities for no apparent reason.

The Oddities are the Giant Silva who is taller than Khali and less talented, Kurrgan who was an interesting character until they turned him face, and Golga who is Earthquake in a mask and obsessed with Cartman from South Park. Ross says he likes ICP which stuns Lawler. This is mostly a comedy match, as no one on the planet thought the Oddities would lose. They were actually an interesting concept, but you need more odd characters than just three big guys.

In a funny spot, Kurrgan gets on his knees to fight Funaki, which sadly makes them about the same size. We get a tug of war between Kurrgan and the other team over Kai En Tai’s manager, Yamaguchi San. He may be the most annoying manager ever, even surpassing Slick, who had a cool song to make up for his annoyance. As the crowd somehow gets even quieter, all four small guys run in and attack Silva, which also doesn’t work.

Ross tries to compare him to Andre as I glare at my screen. Anyway, eventually Tenta, or Golga I guess, the most talented guy in this match is tagged in and gets beaten down surprisingly. The four man team actually is fun to watch as they work really well together. He comes back with a quadruple clothesline as this is going on WAY too long.

A double, double chokeslam followed by a huge splash finally ends this as ICP tries to bring the crowd back to life. I will give the Oddities this: the dancing was pretty funny.

Rating: C-. This was fairly funny, but it just went on way too long. It’s almost a ten minute comedy match, which is about twice as long as it needs to be. The gimmick was fine, but we get it: Kai En Tai couldn’t do crap here. You don’t need to make us see that over and over again.

Jeff Jarrett vs. X-Pac

This is hair vs. hair. Jarrett has Southern Justice with him as we continue to try to validate the Godwinns being employed. On Heat, the trio shaved Fink’s hair. I don’t remember him having much to begin with but ok. Debra desperately needs to get here. Fink is apparently an honorary DX member for tonight only. Sarge sends Southern Justice to the back. Fink doing the crotch chop is one of the greatest things of all time.

He also says suck it as part of my soul dies. Jarrett is the perfect size for someone like X Pac to fight. Like I’ve said, when Pac is fighting someone closer to his size he’s far less annoying and can be enjoyable. They’re working a fast paced match here and it’s working better. They keep going for awhile as this is turning into a good match. Fink gets up on the apron and Jarrett condemns himself to eternal torment by hitting him. This leads to an X Factor but Southern Justice comes out again.

They miss with the guitar and Pac drills Jarrett with it for the pin. The army of people that Jarrett has given haircuts to plus the Outlaws run out to help with the haircut. He’s not shaved, but he gets his short haircut that he had for years.

Rating: B. This was a solid match. Both guys can work a faster pace and in this case it was the right way to go. Both are far better when they don’t try to move up and fight like heavyweights. It was hard hitting and fast paced, which made this a very good little match.

Doc is looking at the Lion’s Den, which was a pretty cool concept. That’s up later on.

Cole is with the Rock, who attacked HHH earlier and hurt his knee. He rips into Cole as only he can do, which is always funny. He also says he’ll win.

Marc Mero/Jackie vs. Sable/Mystery Partner

Mero is doing the boxer thing at this time. There’s no clue who Sable’s partner is here. This is mainly over Sable vs. Mero, which was an interesting concept but it just didn’t work in the end. They tried so hard to make Sable a big deal as a wrestler and it just never worked that well. The partner is…..EDGE! Edge was still a rookie at this point so it’s really get how big he was going to become.

Anyway, this is more or less all about Sable, so it’s naturally not going to be that interesting. I swear that woman had a bigger ego than Hogan at times. She comes in and beats on Jackie for a bit because heaven forbid that Edge, the young guy who has a lot to prove still gets significant ring time. Eventually Edge does and immediately throws a great suicide dive over the top rope onto Mero before spanking Jackie to a big pop.

See what happens when you let someone with that little thing called real talent into the match? It gets a lot better and the crowd is more into it. The problem with Sable was simple: only horny men cared about her. Other than that, she was pretty much worthless. This is really just getting bad at this point. Not the in ring stuff, but how this is all about Sable.

Edge beats Mero up, then Sable comes in and gets a hurricanrana out of it, despite the rules earlier being men vs. men and women vs. women. Jackie helps out with the worst looking spot I’ve ever seen. Somehow Mero is too far from the corner for the falling headbutt spot, so Jackie steps forward and THEN collapses onto Mero’s crotch. Edge knocks him out even more, just so Sable can have Edge lift her up for a splash to get the win.

Ross of course screams SHE did it, after which Lawler (thank goodness) says THEY did it. I knew I always liked Jerry better. The referee raises Sable’s hand first, then goes back and raises their hands together. Ok now I’m just being picky. Post match, it’s all about what Sable did as this is just stupid now. Edge just kind of leaves as Sable celebrates. Commentary: Oh yeah Edge was good too.

Rating: F. Not for the match, which was ok, but for Sable. This match was a love letter from Sable to Sable and it was just bad to say the least. It was all about her and Edge, Jackie and Mero were just along for the ride. Edge did 90% of the work and was an afterthought.

Sable did two moves on her own, one of which was sloppy at best, yet the whole thing was about her. Even at the end of the match when JR said she did it, you knew this was all about her. That’s just flat out stupid no matter who it is. This really was stupid to me and it left a bad taste in my mouth.

We now get what to me was one of the funniest interviews I’ve seen in a long time. Mankind is panicking because he can’t find his sledgehammer (which he had like 30 minutes ago and we haven’t seen him do anything since then but whatever) and he doesn’t have a partner against the Outlaws. He and Kane are the tag champions at this point and it’s a hardcore match (billed as falls count anywhere and no holds barred but you get the idea).

He says that Cole should be his partner in getting their heads kicked in and he hands him a belt. This is something that should never be done again. Anyway, Vince comes up and we see the brilliance of these two characters. Foley is putty in Vince’s hands and you can see him just manipulating Mankind with a few short and simple words. It really is well done here. He promises Mick that if he wins, he’ll get him in the MSG hall of fame.

He brings Foley some weapons, which inspire Foley. Foley says that he thinks he has 13 words for the Outlaws: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? This is as bizarre as it sounds and maybe it’s the Foley mark in me, but I loved it.

Recap of the Owen/Shamrock feud, which was an ok idea, but it didn’t need Severn involved. Short version: Owen hates Shamrock for no apparent reason, so he got Dan Severn to train him and they’re having a match in a small octagon called the Lion’s Den, which is named after Shamrock’s training facility.

Lion’s Den Match: Owen Hart vs. Ken Shamrock

This match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. I know that because Ross said that this match is taking place in a theater adjacent to MSG. So this is the WWF version of the UFC cage but they’re wrestling a WWF style match in there, which is about what you’d expect I guess, as it’s pretty clear Shamrock wouldn’t have much trouble in a real MMA fight with Owen.

Hart would hang on for awhile, but it’s not likely he would have much of a chance in the long run. The cage offers some different effects, but it’s nothing earth shattering. It’s better than a normal match would have been though, as it suits Shamrock very well. Speaking of that, he hits a sweet move as he gets a running start and plants his foot on the cage to jump backwards and catch Owen with I think either a back elbow or a dropkick.

Either way it looks very good and he nailed him with it. The cage isn’t really offering a lot of differences, but the main one is on whips. With no ropes, you’re just hitting cage, which has to hurt pretty badly. Hart gets the sharpshooter, which Ross says no one does better. Remind me never to leave WWF.

This is likely the coolest spot of the match as Shamrock crawls to the cage and climbs it while in the Sharpshooter, forcing the hold to be broken. The problem is they just brush over it, despite it being brilliant. Owen gets a choke on him but Shamrock runs up the cage to backflip out of it and gets the real ankle lock, not the Angle lock, to get the win.

Rating: B-. This was a weird concept and I guess it worked. It didn’t really fail, but it just wasn’t the best thing in the world. Overall the in cage stuff was fine, but it just wasn’t to my liking and I’m glad it only happened like three times.

Austin says he’ll do whatever it takes to keep the title.

Tag Titles: Mankind vs. New Age Outlaws

Like I said, there’s no Kane so this is virtually a hardcore handicap match. The announcer calls it a no holds barred pinfalls match count anywhere, so I wonder what he did during that long break they had for the Lion’s Den match. Both of the Outlaws are rocking South Park shirts, and remember this is back when that was a brand new show. There’s a dumpster at ringside. The Outlaws do a conchairto with cookie sheets.

I’ve always wondered why there were cookie sheets at ringside. Apparently the Outlaws should tag. Why? What are they going to do, get disqualified? This is really short and you can probably guess how it ends. Dang it I just realized I didn’t put up any matches from this show. You’ll live I suppose for this one.

Anyway, WZ is down right now so it’s not like I have anything else to do with my time. Anyway, the Outlaws win after a spike pile driver in the general area of the title belt. Now they’re going to put him in the dumpster. Post match, Kane is in the dumpster and drills Foley’s unseen body with the sledgehammer.

Rating: D+. This was really short and wasn’t that good. For a match like this, it can work but it needs a lot more than 6 minutes. Granted, I don’t think they were looking for a classic in this. It was just too short to get going and it felt like it was over just after it started.

Recap of DX vs. Nation, including the DX imitation of the Nation, which I’m sure you’ve all seen a million times. We also see D’Lo Brown pinning HHH for the European Title. It’s amusing that this is supposed to be DX vs. the Nation, yet all we see is HHH and Rock for about 95% of this. Oh yeah and that REALLY dumb time limit draw in a 2/3 falls match. All of that leads us to this. HHH’s promo before Summerslam from Raw: At Summerslam, you’re gonna bow to me! That’s all he said and that was perfect.

Ladder Match: IC Title: HHH vs. Rock

This is going to be good. The DX Band plays HHH to the ring, which is really cool actually. I think HHH is being followed by a nuclear power plant. Oh never mind. That’s just Chyna’s neon green outfit, not nuclear fallout. HHH picks Chris Warren, the singer, up and carries him around the ring while he’s still singing, which looks a bit stupid. I’ve never gotten the point in destroying the band’s equipment after a performance.

Oh yeah and at the time there was a bad storyline with Chyna and Mark Henry that ended with Henry almost sleeping with a transvestite. Yeah it was worse than it sounds. They start out with just standard stuff, but are out by the ladder inside of three minutes. In a bit of a surprising move, they don’t touch it yet. I like that. Save it for a solid buildup and then go for it. That being said, it’s in the ring less than 2 minutes later.

In a painful looking spot, Rock goes up the ladder but HHH comes off the top rope to stop him. He gets that done, but the ladder falls on him. He didn’t know it was coming, or he’s the greatest seller I’ve ever seen, and I’m leaning towards the former. Here we have a great example of why theatrical moves like the People’s Elbow are stupid. Rock has the ladder set up and drops an elbow off the apron down onto HHH who is laying on it.

How is that different than the People’s Elbow? In short, it isn’t, yet the People’s Elbow can win world titles. Explain to me how that makes any sense at all. Anyway, HHH’s knee gives out soon after this, as he has to put all his weight on it to stay up. Now that’s the focus of the match, which is something I really like. Now, instead of just big spot followed by big spot, we have a reason to pay attention to what’s not involved with the ladder.

That’s putting psychology in as well, as JR puts it: one legged men don’t win kicking contests, and they don’t climb ladders either. We get a Home Improvement reference to really date the show a bit. It’s rare to see two heavyweight guys in a match like this, but that doesn’t mean that it’s going to be bad. Here you have two guys where it’s more about the feud rather than the prop and the gimmick, which is more or less a guaranteed way to make the match better.

Oh yeah the ladder is big and yellow for no apparent reason. We get an extra ladder to make things a bit more interesting. Henry and Chyna get into it on the floor as HHH stops Rock from winning. Soon thereafter Rock is busted open but HHH can’t climb the ladder because of his knee. Rock makes the save as HHH has to climb like a turtle. See, that’s nice for a change.

Instead of having the guy climb all slow for no reason other than to fill time and give the other guy a chance to catch him, we have a real reason. See how much better and more intelligent that seems? HHH’s knee is hurt, so he can’t climb. Behold the wonders of psychology, even in gimmick matches. Rock is down, so HHH gets a chair and just wears him out with it.

Since it’s a gimmick match though, Rock is back up inside of 20 seconds and land a People’s Elbow on the ladder. They fight over the ladder but HHH gets up it a bit. However, he jumps off onto Rock and lands right in the Rock Bottom. HHH catches him though because the ladder is almost broken. He pulls him down with one hand since he’s the Game and lands the Pedigree as both guys are pretty much dead, with good reasoning.

They’ve beaten the living tar out of each other and it’s a tossup at this point. Ross is losing his mind at this point. With both guys down, Henry throws powder into his eyes and since the ref didn’t see it, it’s ok. It’s a ladder match. What could he do anyway? Even blinded, HHH climbs the ladder perfectly. Rock goes after him but Chyna low blows him. HHH gets up the rest of the ladder and grabs the belt to blow the roof off the place as DX runs out to celebrate.

Rating: A+. This right here is what WWE needs so desperately to do today: give two young guns nearly half an hour and let them go steal the show. This match worked for many reasons, but the biggest was it wasn’t about the ladder and big spots. It was about the two guys trying to get the win, with the spots being something that helped them accomplish that goal.

The knee injury was great as well, with HHH barely being able to walk for a large part of the match. The crowd was WAY into this as the pop for HHH winning the title and ending the feud was great. This is an absolute classic and to me could rival Shawn and Razor.

We go to “exclusive home video footage” of Rock heading to his locker room. Hearing the people say they need to get Taker ready isn’t something that should air. More or less, Rock says he’s still the people’s champ, no matter what.

This is the culmination of the entire summer, which was the theme being the ending of the road being here at Summerslam. That’s actually really smart. Apparently Taker says no Kane. Ross says this should be a classic. That’s just funny. No video package or recap or anything. That’s VERY rare.

WWF Title: Undertaker vs. Steve Austin

I’m sure you know the story, but just in case: basically, Taker is accused of being the main guy in a giant conspiracy against Steve Austin, which Vince denies every time. All the signs are there though, so Austin believes that it’s Taker who is the mastermind. Now, this would result in one of my all time favorite angles, and the ONLY time when a Vince Russo angle got to where it was supposed to go and got him labeled a genius.

Eventually, Taker and Kane took the title from Austin in a “triple threat”, which was really a handicap. However, Taker started turning crazy as Rock won the title. Eventually, Taker formed the Ministry to fight Vince and struck out on his own to take over the company. Vince and Shane, who was new as a big time character, formed the Corporation to fight Taker, but Shane kicked Vince out.

This is where the angle got intense, as Taker started being very satanic in nature, burning crosses, sacrificing people, and more or less bringing in religion to the shows. This leads to the big one, which is Taker kidnapping Stephanie at the end of Backlash. In perhaps my all time favorite segment, he was attempting to marry Stephanie, but Austin comes out and single handedly takes out the Ministry.

A few weeks later, Taker has the belt and says that the Higher Power is coming soon. It turns out that the higher power is Vince. Vince destroyed his family, tortured his daughter, and nearly ended his whole company, all to get the WWF Title off of Steve Austin. Holy goodness was this cool at the time. It all culminated in Austin being named CEO, which after a few other things, led to Austin beating Taker for the title on Raw, which if my memory is right is still the highest rated single match in wrestling history.

WOW I went off on a tangent there. Sorry about that but I love this stuff. As Taker is coming out, you can hear someone that sounds like Lawler shout GET OUT EARL. You can see Earl slide out, just as pyro goes off in the ring. That was insanely close. They do the real glass for the shatter here which is always cool looking. Austin is rocking the Smoking Skull belt here.

There’s a moment in this match that changes the whole thing. It’s said that these two simply couldn’t have a good match together. I disagree. At In Your House 15, they had a very good one. However, like I said, there’s a moment in here where things change drastically, which I’ll mention when we get to it. This starts off very weird, with them battling over control of each other’s arm.

Austin even uses a drop toe hold into a fujiwara armbar. Now, a lot of you may be thinking, how is this different than Hogan and Sting sucking the life out of Starrcade 1997? Well, the answer is kind of unclear. I think the main thing is that they keep the pace going fast. While it’s mat based at first, they never stay in the same place twice. They keep the energy high, which is smart.

Not everything has to be punching and kicking to make it work, so they threw in something different. Now I’m not saying that it worked as the crowd is clearly a lot more silent now, but they’re far from dead. I think what they’re going for is a slow build to a big finish, and there’s not a thing wrong with that. What there is a thing wrong with is what happens next.

Taker whips him in and ducks. Austin, naturally, kicks him in the face. That’s a very standard move and it makes good sense. However, due to Taker’s height, his head slams into Austin’s chin, breaking his jaw. For the rest of the match, Austin is clearly off balance, and it makes them look bad. While Austin is clearly the bigger face, Taker isn’t really a full heel here, but he’s leaning more towards that way.

The announcers point out that Austin is hurt and just doesn’t look right. Dang something about Summerslam just doesn’t agree with him for some reason. We get some standard Taker beatdown stuff, but Old School is countered with an….no that had to be an error. I couldn’t have seen that. Austin couldn’t have used….an arm drag, could he? I…I think he might have. Ok this joke is stupid he used an arm drag.

As this happens, Kane comes out but Taker sends him back, which is odd indeed. Not sure if that was really needed actually. Austin works the knee, which makes a lot of sense. Psychology isn’t something you see that often from Austin, but he’s certainly an intelligent wrestler. He gets a bad reputation as nothing but a brawler, and that’s just not fair. They go to the crowd which is always fun.

The crowd is coming to life and dying again and again, but I think it’s more alive than dead. Austin goes for a stunner and the people go nuts, just for him grabbing at Taker’s head. That’s saying a lot. Austin is taking a freaking beating here. I’m not sure if I like this match or not. It’s certainly not terrible, but it’s nothing great. I think it’s another case of a match having insane hype and there’s just no way they can live up to that.

Taker keeps choking him to buy him more and more time to clear his head, so you at least have to give him points for that. Austin is on the Spanish announce table, as Taker goes up to the top. In a SICK looking spot, Taker hits Austin with a diving leg drop. Now for the problem: the table doesn’t give. The momentum just sends them sliding off of it, but the table is still standing.

That just can’t be a good idea and must hurt horribly. Think about that: Taker is billed at 325 so we’ll say 290, and that slams onto Austin who is on a table. DANG. He kicks out of this in the ring, which stuns JR. Ha, that wasn’t even meant to be a pun, but I laughed. Laugh people. We get the double clothesline, which even gets a pop. You have to love New York crowds. They’ll get excited about ANYTHING.

Alright, now we get to the end. We start (laugh again) with Austin’s comeback, which is standard stuff: punches and the double bird elbow. You can REALLY tell that Austin just isn’t all there. It’s showing really badly. Taker reverses to send Austin chest first into the corner, but he hits something that looks like a bad stunner. Even the announcers say that wasn’t a stunner.

Taker kicks out and hits a pretty bad chokeslam, then goes for the tombstone. Instead though, for some reason he can’t get Austin up so he crotches him on the top rope. They look like rookies out there. The rest of the match I thought was pretty good up until now. Lawler keeps trying to convince us that they went through the table, which is a lie. The ending is very weird and comes out of nowhere.

Taker is dominating, and goes for Old School again. He jumps, but Austin gets his arm up to low blow Taker. Kick, stunner, pinfall…really? Even the referee looks a bit confused for this one. Taker remains a semi-face by handing the belt to Austin after the match. Austin can barely get to the corner ropes right so he’s way out of it. Kane comes out to watch Austin right next to Taker. They leave together as Austin celebrates.

Rating: B-. This is a hard one to grade. Given the injuries to both, this was good. Factoring those out, this was bad. However, I’ll certainly make exceptions as both were hurt while trying to make something happen in the course of a match. It certainly wasn’t awful, but it wasn’t that far from it.

I see why people criticize it, but like I said earlier I think this suffers a lot from its hype. This match was built up as huge, and there was no way it could match that. Overall, I liked it though. Austin won clean, which needed to happen. It built him into an even bigger star, and Taker didn’t exactly lose everything because of it. I liked it, but I could see people hating it.

Overall Rating: B. I thought this was a very solid show, with the only bad match being the Oddities, but what do you expect from a comedy match with only a small bit of talent to go around? I still hate the Sable thing. It was just flat out overkill and wasn’t needed, since it only happened to build up her massive ego even more.

You have a flat out classic in the ladder match and what I thought was a good main event. It’s a solid show and definitely the biggest and best built Summerslam I’ve seen so far and maybe the best ever. This was a Wrestlemania like atmosphere and it definitely paid off. A very solid recommendation here, but not the highest.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIV (2015 Redo): An Actual New Era

Wrestlemania XIV
Date: March 29, 1998
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 19,028
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Tag Team Battle Royal

Los Boricuas (Vega/Perez), Los Boricuas (Estrada/Castillo), Truth Commission (Recon/Sniper), Bradshaw/Chainz, Nation of Domination (Brown/Henry), Nation of Domination (Faarooq/Mustafa), Legion of Doom 2000, Quebecers, Rock N Roll Express, Headbangers, Too Much, Disciples of Apocalypse, Steve Blackman/Flash Funk, Godwinns, New Midnight Express

Ever the poor sports, the Godwinns come back in with their metal buckets to knock the LOD silly and give the Express a chance. Animal rolls under the ropes to the floor, leaving Hawk to beat up both goons on his own. Animal comes back in to clean house and the Express is clotheslined out to give LOD the win at 8:13.

Kevin Kelly and Honky Tonk Man tell us to CALL THE HOTLINE!

Clips of various media appearances that took place in Boston over the recent days. This would become a Wrestlemania tradition and always made the show feel more important.

Light Heavyweight Title: Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila

Michinoku is defending and won the inaugural title late last year. Aguila is better known as Essa Rios and slaps hands with the champion to start. A quick spinwheel kick sends Taka out to the floor and Aguila follows him out with a moonsault to the outside. Taka kicks him outside as well and nails his signature running springboard dive to take over again.

European Title: HHH vs. Owen Hart

Hart starts fast and scores with some early clotheslines and right hands in the corner followed by a standing hurricanrana for two. So much for the leg being badly damaged but he does seem a bit ginger. HHH sends him to the floor but Slaughter stops Chyna from interfering. Back in and a poke to the eye breaks up the Sharpshooter to give HHH control.

Rating: B. What a difference a year makes with HHH as he went from a slow, boring match with Goldust to a really good, fast paced match here with Owen. I never quite got why Hart kept losing and losing to HHH as you would think they might want to go somewhere with him as the last remaining Hart. At least he was a good opponent for HHH and we got a good match here.

Marc Mero/Sable vs. Luna/The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Mero celebrates like he got the pin in a perfect character move.

Intercontinental Title: Ken Shamrock vs. The Rock

Rock is defending and the leader of the Nation of Domination. He actually gave Shamrock a title shot back at the Rumble where Shamrock got disqualified and the feud has continued from there. This included Rock BLASTING Shamrock in the face with a chair a few weeks back on Raw in a shot that would probably get him fired today. Rock has the Nation in his corner, minus Faarooq who Rock took the leadership from. If Rock gets disqualified here, he loses the title.

Tag Team Titles: Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie vs. New Age Outlaws

In Your House XXI ad.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kane and this is going to get a bit complicated. Paul Bearer had promised to destroy Undertaker and revealed that Undertaker had a brother named Kane, who had been horribly burned in a fire as a child, a fire that Bearer claimed Undertaker set. During the first Hell in a Cell match, Kane actually debuted and laid out Undertaker, seemingly setting up their first match. However, Undertaker vowed to his parents that he would never fight his brother.

Undertaker vs. Kane

They stare each other down and Undertaker hammers away to almost no effect. A big toss by the throat sends Undertaker into the corner but Kane charges into a boot to the face. Undertaker charges into a Tombstone attempt but gets dropped on his head in the corner. Kane knees Undertaker down in the corner before draping him ribs first across the top rope.

Bearer comes in for some cheap shots, allowing Kane to lay Undertaker out with a chair and another Tombstone. Kane and Bearer leave but Undertaker sits up again.

Another Attitude spot, but this time with some legends talking about how amazing their days were. In their time, there were no flashing lights or moonsaults, no walking the top rope or pyrotechnics. Today though, the legends are the ones cheering. Another outstanding ad here as you can see that everything is changing.

We recap Austin vs. Michaels, which translates to a video on Mike Tyson, who is the real star of this show and the reason it was such a big deal. This is one of the best celebrity investments in company history and made the match.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels

JR gets the famous line with “The Austin Era has begun!” Michaels is ticked off at Tyson and takes a swing, earning him a right hand to the jaw to knock Shawn out cold. Confetti falls and the highlight package takes us out.

There are better Wrestlemanias out there but this one was the right show at the right time with the right ending. The memorable moments here are memorable for a reason and the show holds up today for all the right reasons. This show launched the WWF into its second great era and they never looked back. Well not for a few years at least.

Ratings Comparison

Tag Team Battle Royal

Original: D-

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D+

Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila

Original: D+

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

HHH vs. Owen Hart

Original: B-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: B

Marc Mero/Sable vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust/Luna Vachon

Original: C

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

New Age Outlaws vs. Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: B

Kane vs. Undertaker

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

That’s a lot more all over the place than usual, even by my standards.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/21/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-14-everything-changes-forever/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/23/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xiv-the-austin-era-has-begun/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIV (2013 Redo): Like Looking In A Weird Mirror

Wrestlemania XIV
Date: March 29, 1998
Location: Boston Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 19,028
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Chris Warren of the DX Band sings an unnecessary rock/metal version of the Star Spangled Banner/America the Beautiful. Thankfully this is booed out of the building.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Los Boricuas (Vega/Perez), Los Boricuas (Estrada/Castillo), Truth Commission (Recon/Sniper), Bradshaw/Chainz, Nation of Domination (Brown/Henry), Nation of Domination (Faarooq/Mustafa), Legion of Doom 2000, Quebecers, Rock N Roll Express, Headbangers, Too Much, Disciples of Apocalypse, Steve Blackman/Flash Funk, Godwinns, New Midnight Express

The fans are completely behind the LOD as you would expect. Apparently the title match will be next month at Unforgiven. Things slow WAY down as Hawk runs over Henry Godwinn. The bikers (D.O.A.) are gone but they come back in to eliminate the Godwinns for fun. That leaves the returning L.O.D. against Bombastic Bob Holly and Bodacious Bart Gunn. Do I need to draw you a picture here?

CALL THE HOTLINE!

Light Heavyweight Title: Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila

Back in and Michinoku misses a corkscrew dive but Aguila hits a moonsault for two. Taka fights up and hits a smack to the face to put Aguila on his knees. A splash hits knees though and Aguila puts Michinoku back on the top. Aguila hits a big old rana off the top for no cover, allowing Taka to come back with a knee in the chest. A missile dropkick puts Aguila down as does a powerbomb, but Taka misses a moonsault. Aguila dives into a dropkick though and the Michinoku Driver retains the title.

European Title: HHH vs. Owen Hart

Chyna decks Slaughter post match.

We recap Mero/Sable against Goldust/Luna. This was a weird feud as Mero had been a total jerk to Sable for months as he thought she was hogging the spotlight. Then Luna and Goldie went after her so for about a week, Mero was the gallant hero standing up for her honor.

The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust/Luna Vachon vs. Marc Mero/Sable

Mero pounds away on Goldust in the corner but gets clotheslined down to change control. A quick cross body gets two for Marc but Goldust hits an uppercut to put him right back down. The fans chant for Sable as the men collide. A double tag brings in the girls and Sable spears Luna down. She pounds away and kicks Luna in the corner before bealing her across the ring.

Jeff Jarrett brings out Gennifer Flowers to be at ring announcer for the next match.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie

Back in and Cactus goes up on top of the ladder along with Billy, onto to have Terry knocked into the ladder, sending both guys on top of it into the dumpster. Cactus climbs out as Terry is powerbombed into the dumpster.

Unforgiven is in Greensboro, North Carolina.

Undertaker vs. Kane

Post match Kane lays out Undertaker again, blasting him with a chair a few times. A tombstone on the chair leaves Taker out cold.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Steve Austin

We get the famous line from JR of “The Austin Era has begun!” as Austin gets the belt for the first time. He poses on the ropes in another famous visual before handing Tyson an Austin shirt. Shawn is ticked off at Tyson and gets in his face so Tyson lays him out with a right hand (JR: “TYSON! TYSON! TYSON! RIGHT HAND! DOWN GOES MICHAELS!”). Massive celebrating ends the show.

Ratings Comparison

Tag Team Battle Royal

Original: D-

Redo: D

Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila

Original: D+

Redo: B

HHH vs. Owen Hart

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Marc Mero/Sable vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust/Luna Vachon

Original: C

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: C-

New Age Outlaws vs. Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie

Original: C+

Redo: C

Kane vs. Undertaker

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B+

Redo: B

I have no idea what I was thinking on the second and third matches.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/21/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-14-everything-changes-forever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XIV (Original): He Did It

Wrestlemania 14
Date: March 29, 1998
Location: Fleetcenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 19,028
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross
America the Beautiful: Chris Warren

We have arrived in the Attitude Era full blast now. As of last year’s Wrestlemania, it was about as obvious as possible that Austin was going to be the guy that the company put itself on for the foreseeable future. Bret was gone due to Montreal and, we didn’t know it at the time, but Shawn was on his way out. This show was based completely around storyline with wrestling thrown in on the side.

The big deal at this show was Mike Tyson. Floyd Mayweather at last year’s show was nothing but a cheap imitation of this. Tyson being on the show was absolutely mind blowing at the time as he was one of the biggest names in the world. We all knew Austin would get the belt, but with Tyson there we wanted to see how he did it. The other feud was a mind blowing one as well with Kane vs. the Undertaker.

That feud is about as epic as you can get so I’ll go into the explanation for that when it’s time. This was the first show that was completely in the new era and it’s clear that the company was going in a new direction. You can see that in the very first match of the show. Before that though, we get an excellent video talking about how the new generation is killing off the tradition of Wrestlemania, but it questions if they really are doing so. Check it out if you get the chance. Where was I? Oh yes, let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how there’s a new era in the company. This era is full of brash young men that are fighting for the same title that Hogan and Sammartino had. Tonight instead of fighting history, they will become it. Cool opening video.

With no pyro or anything, it’s time for the first match.
Tag Team Battle Royal

Los Boricuas (Vega/Perez), Los Boricuas (Estrada/Castillo), Truth Commission, Bradshaw/Chainz, Nation of Domination (Henry/Brown), Nation of Domination (Farrooq/Kama), Quebecers, New Midnight Express (Bart Gunn and Bob Holly), Rock N Roll Express (original), Headbangers, Too Much (Too Cool), Disciples of Apocalypse, Steve Blackman/Flash Funk, Godwins, Legion of Doom 2000
This is for a title shot the following month at Unforgiven. The LOD is returning here, managed by the epitome of sex appeal, Sunny. If you ask most people here, Sunny was one of their first crushes. Just an absolute goddess. Anyway, this is a pretty big mess of a match. The rules are that if one man is eliminated, so is his partner. The RVD sign in the crowd amuses me. The crowd is going nuts for LOD, who were always ridiculously over.

We only see the intros of Farrooq/Kama and the LOD, more or less saying who the winners are automatically. Why there’s a remix of their song I have no idea. Anyway, Animal is in shorts now and Sunny is in very little. LOUD LOD chant starts up. Everyone starts on the floor so it’s a big brawl to start. Savio goes out. There isn’t much to say here as everything is a big mess with 30 people in the ring to start.

Kurrgan comes out and eliminates the Truth Commission. Barry Windham comes out to get rid of Chainz and Bradshaw. Thankfully that clears up a bit of space here. D’lo and Henry are out. The Quebecers are out. This is going so fast that you can’t keep up with anything at all. The original Express is out. This is annoying beyond belief.

Castillo and Estrada are out. Headbangers are out. Henry is still in there even though his partner is out. I have no idea who is left. Henry is gone finally. Too Much is gone and Lawler is mad. Uh the Godwins, the DOA, the LOD, New Midnights and that’s it. We slow WAY down and this is just boring.

The DOA is finally out. We went from like two eliminations a minute to one in three minutes. Ok the DOA is still in. Now the Godwins are out as is DOA. The Godwins get their buckets to drill LOD, making it harder for the new Midnights to pick them up and toss them as the LOD are now dead weight. Animal goes under the ropes but Hawk hangs on. I think you know the ending here. The LOD clean house and almost stereo eliminations give the old guys the win.

Rating: D-. This was awful. The ending was known far before the match ended, the eliminations were awful as they went far too fast, and there were WAY too many people in the ring at once with 30 being in there at the beginning. This team went nowhere for the most part but anytime Sunny looks like that you can’t call it a failure at all.
Light Heavyweight Championship: Taka Michinoku vs. Aguila

This is the epitome of filler. No one ever knew what to do with these guys so it would be Taka vs. random opponent of the month. This whole title was just a waste and I don’t think anyone missed it when it was exiled to Metal. It was clearly a response to the Crusierweights, but the problem was simple: most of the good cruiserweights were taken already.

Aside from Taka, the WWF guys had no personality, no substance to them at all, and were just dull. There was absolutely no structure to the division whatsoever. See what I’m doing here? I’m typing this out so I don’t have to be bored to death by this match. Dang it I have to watch it I guess. There was zero transition here at all either as we just start the match. No entrance for Taka either.

They slap hands to start and here we go. This is very much like the Moolah Women’s Title defenses back in the 70s and early 80s. Asai moonsault by Aguila who is only 19. We head to the floor for the second time tonight as Taka hits a huge plancha to take down Aguila.

We go into the ring and the fans go into their seats. No one cares about these guys and it’s pretty clear. There’s a reason why this division bombed and I’ve gone into it already. We go to the floor for the third time in less than three minutes. Taka counters for a bit but gets caught by a top rope armdrag.

Aguila does some great flips and we’re on the floor one more time. Nice corkscrew plancha by Aguila takes Taka down as we’re doing high spot, rest, high spot, rest, lather rinse repeat. Moonsault by Aguila gets two. Middle rope splash gets knees for Taka and the champion is in trouble. Michinoku Driver and a moonsault miss but Taka gets a counter with a dropkick and the second attempt at the Driver ends this.

Rating: D+. The match was fine but at the same time, this was rather pointless. It’s the definition of filler as there was no reason to care about any character. Only Taka got any kind of extended camera time and when the challengers are all gone a week later, why in the world should I get interested? The division never worked and those are some reasons why.

We see some woman that had something to do with Bill Clinton interviewing the Rock. This is completely hilarious as Rock is the most egomaniacal person of all time, saying that all the major issues like homelessness aren’t important as long as his lawn is clean. He’s the judge and jury and is always a hung jury, if you smell what he’s cooking. If my memory is right, that’s the debut of that line. He makes sex jokes about interns and is absolutely hilarious.

European Title: HHH vs. Owen Hart

This feud is a residual effect from Montreal. The time of HHH as leader of DX was on the horizon as was his face turn. That would lead to one of the best feuds of the late 90s between him and the Rock, culminating in an absolute war in the ladder match at Summerslam. Chris Warren and the DX Band play HHH to the ring. He’s champion here and Chyna will be handcuffed to Sgt. Slaughter, the commissioner, during the match.

We get a quick video of Owen’s bad ankle being destroyed by Chyna and losing the title to HHH as a result. Owen never got his big match with Shawn and was more or less buried and fed to HHH who moved on to bigger stuff. Owen was given the European Title after beating Goldust to keep him appeased but the writing was totally on the wall at that point.

Setting up the handcuffs takes FOREVER. Owen comes out and the fight is on in a hurry. Bret is actually mentioned here which is odd to hear indeed. Hurricanrana gets two. Owen was insane in the ring at times for someone his size. HHHHH gets in a shot to the knee and we hit the floor. Chyna tries to interfere but gets stopped cold by Slaughter.

Owen takes over again and we go back to the ring. Sharpshooter almost goes on but HHH rakes the eyes. Hart lowers his head and gets a facebuster because of it. Well if you do it that obviously you deserve to get a knee to the face. Crotch chop to Owen. Earl Hebner isn’t here tonight and is in intensive care for some reason. He’s watching Mania though, probably thinking of how to screw over Owen for a change.

Suplex by HHH gets no cover. Jerry screams at HHH to go for the ankle but it’s a Flair knee drop instead. DDT gets two. HHH finally goes after the ankle and the big beaked Canadian is screaming in pain. Owen’s nose is busted. More ankle work but Owen gets some shots in to take over a bit. He ducks a boot and slides HHH’s balls into the post. Get Stephanie stat!

Missile dropkick gets two as the ankle is ok enough for that I guess. Quick belly to belly gets two. Enziguri puts HHH down but it reinjures the ankle and down goes Owen. The delay allows HHH to kick out before the three. Rana is blocked into a powerbomb for two for HHH. Chyna keeps trying to interfere as Owen gets a cross body for two.

Pedigree is blocked into another Sharpshooter attempt but Owen manages to fall on the little Pedigrees again for two. Owen lowers his head again and almost gets caught in the Pedigree again. Instead it’s reversed into the Sharpshooter but Chyna is able to pull HHH to the ropes even with Sarge out there. That’s rather impressive. Chyna gets some white powder from somewhere (read as Waltman) and throws it in Slaughter’s eyes. A low blow to Owen lets HHH hit the Pedigree to end it.

Rating: B-. This was a pretty solid match but they needed a few more minutes. Also the cheating at the end made the Slaughter aspect completely pointless. It’s good but there’s just not enough there to warrant a higher grade. I liked it though as Owen and HHH were both good in the ring with HHH being a shell of what he would become.

Chyna beats up Slaughter post match to a big pop just because she can.

Apparently we have some technical difficulties as Vince should be checked for a heart attack. I didn’t notice anything.

We recap Sable vs. Mero with him being starved for attention while Sable became a star. He got Goldust and Luna to help him in some weird way. This was one of the weirder angles in the early Attitude Era which is saying a lot. Luna wanted to make Sable ugly and Mero defended her, bringing Goldie into it. This takes like three minutes to explain.

Marc Mero/Sable vs. Luna and Goldust

Oh he’s the Artist Formerly Known as Goldust here. I lay corrected. Mero is a boxer character here which mirrors his real life background. Goldie is of course dressed in a ridiculous outfit. Sable and Luna want to start us off. Sable is about as clueless as you could ask for. Remember that as I’ll get back to it later. Actually the guys start us off as the gender have to match here.

Off to the women as Sable gets a loud pop. Luna runs and the chase is on. Luna gets back in the ring and tags out so it’s back to the men. Mero backdrops Goldust and it’s off to Sable and Luna. Luna of course hides again like the heel she is so it’s back to Mero and Goldie again. You may notice Sable is doing NOTHING here.

Goldust gets a clothesline out of the corner to put Mero down and take over for a bit. Both guys go for cross bodies and it’s Goldust taking over again. The fans want Sable and I can’t say I blame them. She does look good here. Sable finally comes in to fight Luna and hammers away. She’s incredibly sloppy and fires “martial arts” kicks. Goldie gets drilled also and Luna is reeling.

She manages to get the tag off to Goldie so Sable hits him too. Mero beats on Goldust on the floor but can’t get a slingshot splash to come back in. Sable distracts the referee and Mero gets a low blow. TKO is countered into a DDT for two. Curtain call is reversed and Mero gets a running knee lift and a moonsault press for two. Top rope rana gets two and a rollup from heel miscommunication does the same.

TKO isn’t as crisp as it should be but Luna saves. Sable tags herself in and tries to pin Goldust. Luna misses a splash and Sable debuts her powerbomb to get two. See, for a big move like that it should END THE MATCH. Instead she ends it a few seconds later with a bad TKO.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here considering the star was Sable and Mero vs. Goldust was the core of this. While the did the lifting here, that still gives us the logical conclusion. Of course Sable gets the glory here by being told she’s such a great wrestler. This led to a somewhat sad story actually. After this match, Luna, a long since established veteran, claims that Sable refused to learn how to take bumps and would only get punched or slapped while Luna did all the work.

After the match, Sable was congratulated by everyone while Luna was left completely alone, with the exception of one person telling her she did well: Owen Hart. If you watch the match, you can see that Sable is completely clueless and is only able to do the two big moves that she knew. Other than that it’s all Luna. Also, Luna had always wanted to be the Women’s Champion, yet never got it because of Sable. A very sad story to me.

Jeff Jarrett and that woman from the Rock interview are presented to the crowd in a total waste of time. Oh and Tennessee Lee, the promoter of Jeff Jarrett, introduces them. He’s more famous as Colonel Robert Parker in WCW. Thank goodness the Nation of Domination’s music plays to hurry this along.

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

This was an interesting little feud here. Shamrock was built up to be this fighting machine that had Rock’s number. Recently, Rock had gotten under Farooq’s, the leader of the Nation, skin, claiming that he, the Rock, was the reason for the group’s success. Four members of the Nation including the Rock are at ringside to face Shamrock. God that woman’s voice is annoying. Flowers is doing the announcing if you didn’t get that.

Shamrock really was sweet at what he did. He knew how to fight and he made sure you knew it. While never a great wrestler, he was completely legit and it made him that much more impressive sounding. Rock’s heritage is explained for the ten thousandth time, without it once being explained why his last name was Maivia and his father’s last name was Johnson.

It’s so weird because I’m watching Raw leading up to this as well as this show today so it’s kind of intriguing to see every little bit that set this up. Shamrock had been owning Rock recently and had let Rock get a clean chairshot which would get them fired today. Also Rock hit Farrooq with a chair for no apparent reason.

Shamrock sprints to the ring and it’s on. Rock ducks a lot of punches but gets kicked in the head to take him down. If Rock gets disqualified he loses the title. After some brawling on the floor it’s back in the ring and all Shamrock. The Nation interferes a bit to give Rock control as he sends Shamrock into the steps.

People’s Elbow isn’t quite of the people yet but it’s still good for two. Shamrock is up quickly, likely because it’s just an elbow. Rock is sent to the floor one more time and Shamrock grabs a chair. He shoves the referee down and Rock gets a BIG chair shot to the head for two. That was absolutely sick and is a great example of why those can be a bad thing. Shamrock does his usual stuff, grabs the ankle lock (yes, KEN SHAMROCK brought it to American pro wrestling, not Kurt Angle) for the quick tap to win the title!

Rating: C+. This was very quick but it did the job it was supposed to. Shamrock looked like an animal here and he massacred Rock with relative ease. When it was one on one Rock was completely overmatched and had to cheat to get anything going. The quick tap out was nice also.

Post match the Nation attacks and Shamrock fights them all off. Shamrock grabs the ankle lock again as Farrooq comes down. He looks at Rock and just walks away, more or less turning face. Shamrock grabs the hold again as referees and officials come down. They get their beatings too and Rock is taken out on a stretcher.

Shamrock’s eyes are FREAKY. Due to the beatings, the decision is reversed and Rock keeps the title. He goes after Rock and beats on him even more. Rock wouldn’t lose the title until August at Summerslam and Shamrock wouldn’t get it until October.

The WWF guys say they’re real athletes, which is true.

There’s a gate record tonight as there has never been a more lucrative event in this city. I find that hard to believe with Patriot games or Red Sox games.

Tag Titles: Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie vs. New Ago Outlaws

The backstory here is simple. Jack was feuding with the Outlaws and got tired of getting beaten up, so he got his friend Charlie, a.k.a. Terry Funk to help him. Eventually the Outlaws threw them in a dumpster and threw them off the stage. This match for the tag titles is the result of that act. It’s dumpster match which means you have to put both guys in the dumpster.

Road Dogg is getting the entrance there but doesn’t quite have it yet since they’re not in DX yet. There’s a dumpster at ringside. This is far more of a brawl than a match as you would expect. They hit the floor immediately and the beating is on. It’s Cactus vs. Road Dogg and Funk vs. Gunn. Cactus tries a flip at Road Dogg but bounces off the dumpster instead.

The Outlaws are in control early and manage to get Funk into the dumpster. Roadie hits a Russian Leg Sweep to ram Cactus’ head into the dumpster. That was SICK. The Outlaws slam the lids of the dumpster on the back of the heads of their challengers. Cactus is in the dumpster while Funk is abused. Both challengers are in now and Gunn celebrates but Cactus gets up and gets a double Mandible Claw. They couldn’t shut the lid so the match isn’t over.

Funk pops out of the dumpster with a cookie sheet to hammer away some more. Cactus and Funk take turns giving neckbreakers to Road Dogg as this is a total brawl. Cactus Elbow with a cookie sheet to Gunn on the floor. He looks for more toys and finds a ladder. Oh dear. Cactus and Billy climb it for no apparent reason and get launched into the dumpster.

They both get out but Funk is powerbombed into it by Billy. The Outlaws take Cactus to the back and we don’t have a camera there so we see some replays. Ah there’s a shot in the back with Cactus falling into everything. After being thrown into some massive soda bottles, Cactus finds a chair to even the odds. He puts both Outlaws on a forklift which Funk commandeers to put them in a dumpster to win the titles.

Rating: C+. Hard one to grade here as it was a total mess to say the least. That being said, the challengers worked themselves to death out there and it’s not like the Outlaws ever wrestled anyway. The ending would come into play the next night on raw as the Outlaws would get the decision overturned because they were put into the wrong dumpster. Later that night, the company just happened to have a steel cage handy so the titles were on the line in a cage match. DX interfered, giving the titles to the Outlaws, who finally joined DX.

Now we get to the real stuff on this card. This whole show was built around two matches: the WWF Title match, and this one right here. In what might have been the best booked “silly” feud of all time, the Undertaker was set to do battle with his brother Kane. My God this was built up perfectly. Sit back, because this is a long backstory.

After Paul Bearer betrayed Taker at Summerslam 96, Taker was going after him. Midway through the previous year when Taker was WWF Champion, he feuded with Mankind, managed by Bearer. During that feud, Bearer mentioned the name Kane. This drove Taker insane as he kept trying to cover up what this name meant. Finally Bearer revealed that it was Taker’s brother, and that Taker attempted to kill him.

This led to Bearer eventually saying that when Taker’s parents were killed in a fire, the Undertaker was the person that started the fire in an attempt to kill his parents. What wasn’t known was that his brother was in the house with them. Taker says that it was an accident and that he tried to rescue them but firefighters held him back. Bearer would go on to reveal that he was in fact Kane’s father.

This results in one of the worst beatings ever recorded on WWF television, but it ends with Paul saying that it’s the truth and that Kane told him, because Kane was still alive. Apparently Paul rescued him from the fire and cared for him for the last 20 years, which was unknown to Taker.

This was all revealed over a several month long period of time. Finally, in August, Taker was facing Shawn Michaels in the first ever Hell in a Cell match. Shawn gets one of the worst beatings of all time, but as Taker signals for the Tombstone, the lights go out and we hear organ music. An explosion goes off and a 7ft giant walks through the curtain, accompanied by Paul Bearer.

Taker is stunned as this man rips the door to the cage off and tombstones Taker, allowing Shawn to pin him. There was one key to this whole thing that made it work to me: for probably 3 months, you only heard about Kane. Until the night of the Cell match, you never saw him.

You didn’t know what he looked like, you didn’t know how he dressed, you didn’t know how big he was. You knew absolutely nothing at all but what you heard. All you knew was he was the Undertaker’s brother. After all the buildup you got about him, no matter what he looked like when you finally saw him, he was going to be awesome. That my friends, is how you build up a character.

Anyway, Kane of course wants to fight his brother. In the interest of ratings, Taker says no way. Kane begins just destroying people left and right, including two brothers named Matt and Jeff. They never did anything after that I don’t think. Kane would randomly run in and beat people up, all while begging the Undertaker to fight him.

He would come to the ring and beat up his brother, but Taker kept insisting he couldn’t fight his own flesh and blood. Kane punched him one night and raised him hand to do it again, but Taker blocked it. The crowd went nuts over him simply raising him arm. Taker didn’t fight back though and got beaten up again.

Finally, Taker and Shawn were feuding again, leading up to the Rumble. HHH kept interfering, but one night, out of absolutely nowhere, Kane helped his brother. That Sunday at the Rumble, Taker was gang attacked and Kane came out. However, he beat up his brother and shut him in the casket, costing him the match. Kane then locked it shut and set it on fire.

However, after this occurred, it was revealed that the casket was empty, prompting Paul Bearer to be absolutely terrified, knowing that Taker was still alive somewhere. Kane continued to ravage the company, until one night on Raw, the arena was covered by a blue light, and druids brought out a body on a pedestal. A bolt of lightning hit it, and the man on it rose up, revealing himself to be the Undertaker himself.

In a completely over the top yet still amazing promo, the Deadman said he will gain his revenge on his little brother, accepting his challenge for Wrestlemania. The next week on Raw, Kane was in the ring having called out his brother, yet instead Taker appeared on top of the titantron, talking about how Kane would feel his wrath. Taker then threw a lightning bolt at the stage, igniting a coffin that was standing up. Inside was an effigy of Kane, that began burning.

And that finally leads us to this. The video on the PPV took over five minutes so you know this was a long story.
Kane vs. The Undertaker

Before the match, Pete Rose appears, insulting Boston. Kane then comes out and tombstones Pete Rose, starting a three year running joke feud between the two which was rather funny in my eyes. This was kind of funny but went on too long. Rose sounds drunk too. Also, was there a need to make Kane a face for 8 seconds like that? Anyway, JR puts it just right: as Taker is about to appear, JR says, “This ovation will be not of this world.” He couldn’t’ have been more correct.

The fans all have their lighters out, they’re going crazy, Taker has a line of druids all holding up torches which he walks under, the lightning, the thunder, the smoke, and Taker dressed in his demonic attire. It was absolutely amazing looking and finally the pair face off in the middle of the ring. This is still the best entrance of his I’ve ever seen. This match might have the best build up I’ve ever seen, which is covering a lot of ground.

Taker’s offense is no sold to start which is going to be something you read a lot in this review. Kane launches him into the corner but Taker keeps moving. Almost all Taker so far. Short clothesline by Kane but Taker pops up. Kane gets him in a Tombstone position but rams him into the buckle instead. You have to remember this is maybe the fifth match Kane had in this gimmick, at least two of which had been squashes. This isn’t something he’s used to yet.

Kane takes over and we slow things WAY down. These two seem incapable of having a good match for some reason. Taker winds up on Kane’s shoulders so Kane shoves him face first into the mat. Well kind of as it didn’t go like it was supposed to but you get the idea.

Out to the floor now as Taker is dropped across the railing. Kane drops the steps on Taker’s back as Bearer has the referee. The steps make a big sound and hit the referee in the leg, yet somehow the referee doesn’t call a DQ. Makes sense right? Taker is apparently trying to get Kane to punch himself out. Chokeslam gets two as Kane pulls his brother up.

We hit the chinlock. Now let’s time this as it goes on for FAR too long overall. Yet again we get the beginning of the Streak wrong, saying it started at Mania 8 instead of 7. Minute and a half on this particular chinlock until Taker breaks it up. A clothesline puts the more successful one down and it’s back to the chinlock. Just a minute this time as Taker lifts Kane up and puts him on the apron.

A big boot finally puts Kane on the floor. Taker dives over the ropes but Kane casually steps to the side and lets Taker crash into the table. Top rope clothesline puts Taker down again for two. You ever notice that everyone manhandles Taker better than the previous guy he fought?

Out of nowhere Taker grabs a Tombstone but Kane reverses into one of his own for a long two count. The crowd is barely alive for this by the way. Taker starts firing punches in and a big shot takes Kane down. Big boot is blocked so Taker has to settle for the Chokeslam. Taker gets the Tombstone but KANE KICKS OUT. This was unheard of as I don’t think that had ever been done.

Kane pops up so Taker has to hit a second Tombstone which AGAIN only gets two. Bearer is clutching his chest as he curses Undertaker. Taker goes up and hits a top rope clothesline to put Kane down one more time. The THIRD Tombstone finally gets the pin as he hooks a leg and Kane kicked out at about 3.1.

Rating: D+. While not great from a technical standpoint, this match’s build up was out of this world. A fine example of the hype carrying a match rather than the in ring work. The streak is beginning to mean something now as it reaches 7-0, although I don’t think that’s mentioned for another three years. The match itself more or less sucked, but the buildup was there and enough to make it passable. Cut about 5 minutes out of this and it goes WAY up.

Kane beats up Taker with a chair post match including a Tombstone on it.

We recap Austin vs. Shawn. Basically there’s not much build up here. Austin won the Rumble and got the title shot. On Raw one night, Vince had Mike Tyson show up as a guest, but Austin got in his face, flipping him off and starting a fight. This is what planted the seeds for the Austin vs. McMahon war that went on for nearly two years. Tyson is named the enforcer referee for the title match, but joins DX in between. It was his involvement with Austin that is credited with putting the WWF over the top of WCW, so in the end this was a great move.
WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Shawn Michaels

If you didn’t get that, Mike Tyson is a guest referee and allegedly in Michaels’ pocket. Yep Austin is over. Austin and Tyson immediately get in each other’s faces. Tyson is actually the outside referee here which is probably better. He grabs at Austin’s foot just after the bell. As JR says, it don’t get no bigger than this. Austin flips Shawn off as we’re waiting around a bit before we get going.

Shawn scores with some fast punches and then runs like an intelligent lad. Here comes Austin though and we get the Heart Break reveal. Austin goes for the knee, I guess trying to get rid of Sweet Chin Music. Shawn, with his tights still pulled down, gets backdropped onto DX on the floor.

HHH jumps Austin on the floor but the referee doesn’t disqualify Shawn due to it being too easy of a way out. HHH and Chyna are sent to the back to a huge pop. Austin beats up HHH by the band area because he can. Shawn drills him with a clothesline for hurting his life partner though as this is your standard Attitude Era brawl.

Back in the ring Shawn gets caught coming off the top and here comes Austin again. Flair flip in the corner and Shawn is more or less dead. Atomic drop gets two for the bald one. Austin knocks him off the apron and Shawn’s head smacks into the table. That looked sick. Austin hammers away and the elbow gets two.

We hit the chinlock as it’s clear Shawn is far weaker than he usually would be. Shawn fights back though and it’s time for the ring post. Austin pulls Shawn in and Shawn’s head rams the post instead. Nice and simple counter there. We hit the floor and Austin is sent into the crowd via a backdrop. Shawn pops him in the head with the bell which the referee didn’t see. Tyson did though and is like “I want a new rubber duckie. I’ll name it Albert and I can bite his head off in the tub!”

Back in the ring with Shawn dominating completely. He hammers away on Austin while Tyson cheers Shawn on. Shawn flips off the crowd and limps around the ring. Austin gets a kind of spear and hammers away. Shawn goes flying to the floor again and his back must just be dead. He gets the leg of Austin around the post though to reestablish his dominance.

Shawn works on the knee for a good while as he’s trying to take away the Stunner I guess. That makes sense. According to JR that’s what he’s doing at least. Austin gets knocked into the table by Shawn and Tyson throws him back in. Here’s the Figure Four from Shawn as he channels his inner other old crippled dude.

The hold goes on for a good while but Austin reverses and Shawn lets it go. Austin catapults him into the post for two and it’s time for a sleeper from Shawn. Naturally the referee is bumped (with Shawn’s back going into his face that is) and Austin hammers away. Shawn gets the forearm (minus the jump but I can accept that) and nips up.

Top rope elbow looks to kill Austin but there’s no striped shirt wearing referee. Shawn starts to tune up the band as his face looks horrible from the pain in his back. Austin ducks the kick, Shawn blocks the Stunner, Austin catches the kick, Stunner, Tyson slides in and Austin wins his first title! JR: “The Austin Era has begun.” Perfect description. Tyson puts on an Austin shirt and knocks Shawn the heck out to end the show.

Rating: B+. We all pretty much knew who was going to win here, but we watched to see how Tyson would play in and how Austin would do it. Looking back now and knowing how much pain Shawn was in because of his back, this match goes way up in impressiveness for me.

You can tell when Shawn is selling and when he’s in real pain and it’s good to see that despite Shawn being a complete jerk backstage, he would go out and perform despite the pain he was in. I don’t care how big of a jerk he was, that takes guts. This match pretty much comes down to who is going to hit their big move first.

The match itself is much better than I remember it being. That’s not saying much because I, like most people, barely remember it. We all know the ending and the buildup, but that’s about it. Good, underrated match.­

Overall Rating: B+. If there’s ever been a show where the torch was completely passed, you’re looking at it. Austin winning the title finally is as about as important of an event as you can possibly have in company history. It launched the WWF ahead of WCW in the war, although that wouldn’t be official for a few more weeks, and it was also the last time Shawn would wrestle for nearly 5 years.

However, even with the Taker match, the solid work elsewhere and only two bad matches, you really do have an all around solid show. It’s not great, but it’s certainly worth checking out. Skip the Light Heavyweight match and about five minutes of Taker/Kane and you’ll love the rest of it in theory.

 

 

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1998 (2013 Redo): That’s A Hot One

Royal Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Mike Tyson is in a skybox.

 

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

 

Back in and Luna trips Vader up, finally allowing Goldie to get in a clothesline. Another clothesline puts him down and Goldust works on the leg a bit. Goldie drops a middle rope elbow to the ribs and we head back to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps so Luna can choke him a bit before we head back in. Goldust pounds away again but stops to kiss Vader. I may not be a pro wrestler, but I know better than to kiss a guy called the Rocky Mountain Monster.

 

Vader kills him with a clothesline and suplexes Goldust down before getting two off a splash. Vader loads up the Vader Bomb but a low blow stops him cold. Another clothesline puts Goldie down again and Vader sits on his chest. He loads up the Bomb again and despite Luna jumping in his back, Vader drops it anyway and crushes Goldust for the pin.

 

Austin gets here and tells Cole to park his truck. Southern Justice (the heel Godwinns) follow him, presumably to jump him.

 

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

 

 

 

The Nation goes to attack Austin but only find an Austin foam finger.

 

We recap Shamrock vs. Rock. Shamrock has charged through the Nation to get this shot at the unofficial leader of the team. Mark Henry joined the Nation to save Rock from Shamrock less than a week ago.

 

The Nation argues over which of them will win the Rumble. Rock says the fans of course want to know what he thinks of Clinton and Paula Jones, so he tells the President not to lie down with dogs or you might get fleas. This joke would be done way better over the next few weeks.

 

Intercontinental Title: The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

 

Rock is defending of course. Feeling out process to start with Rocky trying to get a cheap shot in the corner. Both guys shove the other into the corner and Shamrock blocks a shot to the face before hitting one of his own. They run the ropes a bit until Shamrock kicks him in the chest and knocks the champion out to the floor. Back in and Rock pounds away a bit before hitting a corner clothesline. Ken comes back with some clotheslines of his own but the standing clothesline is countered into a hot shot for two.

 

 

Post match the referee finds the knuckles and reverses the decision. The referee is beaten up very badly for his efforts.

 

A Coliseum Video Exclusive from “moments later” show a clean and dry Shamrock in jeans attacking the Rock.

 

Los Boricuas attack someone that they think is Austin but find one of the Disciples of Apocalypse. Brawling ensues.

 

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws, which is old school vs. new with the Outlaws defending the titles. The Outlaws put a big old beating on the LOD and tonight is their return.

 

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

 

 

The Outlaws destroy Animal until Hawk snaps the handcuffs to make the save.

Some fan wins the Austin truck.

We recap the build up to the Rumble. Basically, everyone knows Austin is going to win and EVERYONE else in the Rumble is trying to stop him but not one has been able to slow him down at all. The only difference here: the fans were eating this stuff up with a spoon.

Royal Rumble

Mosh and Funk pair off as do the other two guys. Funk (the announcers are calling him that too) tries a moonsault but it winds up being more of a headbutt than a splash. Phineas Godwinn is #6 and helps Rock beat up Mosh. Not much happens for a bit until 8-Ball of the DOA is #7. Jack misses a charge and Funk backdrops him out to empty the ring out a bit. Apparently someone who might have been Ken Shamrock has attacked Austin.

The Nation members are thrown together and Rock gets hit by Sweet Shin Music and the double arm DDT. Austin hits Dude low and Faarooq throws Love out. Rock puts out Faarooq to give us Austin vs. Rock. They slug it out and Rock is thrown to the apron. Austin is fine with Stunning him and throwing him out to go on to Wrestlemania where he would claim his destiny.

Tyson celebrates “Cole Stone” Steve Austin winning the Rumble.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

The forearm from Shawn sets up the nipup which sets up the top rope elbow. He must be either high as a kite on painkillers or on a huge adrenaline rush to be able to have a match like this at this point. The superkick knocks Taker out cold but Shawn is Shawn and stops for a crotch chop. Taker grabs him by the balls and we head back inside for the beating Shawn deserves. Another Flair Flip sets up the big boot, but Taker misses a clothesline and lands in the casket.

Post match Kane nails the casket shut and hacks at it with an ax. He pours gasoline inside and LIGHTS IT ON FIRE to end the show. Taker of course would disappear from the casket once it was opened up.

Ratings Comparison

Vader vs. The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust

Original: B-

Redo: D

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Original: B-

Redo: C

The Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Legion of Doom vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D

.what in the world was I on back then?

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 1998 (Original): You Can’t Stop Him

Royal Rumble 1998
Date: January 18, 1998
Location: San Jose Arena, San Jose, California
Attendance: 18,542
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We have seen our savior and he is called Austin. So it’s official: Steve Austin ranks somewhere just below free beer in terms of popularity at this point and is the undisputed king of the company. There’s just one thing: he’s not the world champion yet. It’s about as clear as you can make it that Austin is going to win the title at Mania, so this is another formality. However, a few things have happened in the last two months or so.

Number one: Montreal. We have no Bret Hart and Shawn and Vince are now pure evil, especially the latter. The other thing is Starrcade 97, where Hogan’s ego has managed to almost single handedly kill the massive lead that WCW was enjoying. Therefore, even though the results are clear, they have to do this right because if they do, the WWF could actually catch up to WCW (which they did).

Your other main event tonight is Shawn vs. Taker in a casket match, and you know what happens there. I’ve always felt the main event should have been someone else but I’ll get to that later. Anyway, Kane is now apparently face and will be here to help Taker, and you know he wouldn’t ever do anything like turn on him 6 days after joining him or anything like that.

As for the rest of the show, the roster has filled out a lot more now with a lot of the familiar Attitude Era people there now, such as Shamrock, Rock in his more famous form, face Mankind and the Outlaws. Actually a lot of the wrestlers are the same but now they’re in their best forms, which is often the most important part. I have decent memories of this show and it’s certainly important as far as history goes so let’s get it started.

The opening video is about being champion, which is what the show is mainly about so at least it makes sense. The set for the Rumble isn’t elaborate yet as it’s still the circular one that was used for years. Why were there always blimps in the arenas for these things? I’ve never gotten the point of that. Oh yeah Mike Tyson is here tonight too in what turned out to be a big deal for the company as far as going mainstream went. DANG he is getting booed out of the arena.

Vader vs. Goldust

This is actually the Artist Formerly Known As Goldust but I didn’t want to type that out more than once so he’s just Goldust in this. Let’s see: green hair and what we’ll call yellow and blue striped tights. More or less he’s just insane at this point where he’s expressing himself or something like that. It never made a ton of sense but it was different if nothing else.

Vader has just fallen through the floor as far as meaning anything went by this point for no reason that I’ve ever been able to come up with. Well I’ll give him this: he’s still energetic and the fans are WAY into him. Of course that means he’s not worthy of being anything but a jobber in Vince’s company, so there we go. Lawler actually says that he’s glad Goldust is back in men’s clothing for this match.

I think that sums up the Attitude Era pretty well. Vader is just beating the tar out of Goldust at this point. He throws Goldie into the stairs in the worst, weakest looking shot I’ve ever seen. Goldust stopped about 6 inches before he hit them and then tapped them. It looks horrible. We have a hot crowd if nothing else. After a decent comeback, Goldust kisses Vader, and you know what’s coming next.

Apparently Austin isn’t here yet. Why is it that he never got to the arena on time? After putting him down, Vader sets for the Vader Bomb. This takes literally thirty seconds. He deserved the low blow he got from that. There is little more entertaining to me than a big guy just dropping down on someone else.

In a cool looking visual, Luna jumps on Vader’s back as he’s setting for the Bomb again. He’s like screw it who cares and does the move with her on his back. The sight of Luna flying through the air and just stopping dead when Vader lands is great for some reason. Naturally this ends it.

Rating: B-. For an opener, this was a very good choice. The fans were into Vader and he looked quite solid out there. It was a standard beatdown and the ending spot looked cool. It wasn’t epic and it wasn’t supposed to be, so this was exactly right and I’m perfectly fine with it. For the life of me I don’t get the complete lack of push for Vader.

Austin is here and the Godwins follow him. Apparently all 29 other guys want to kill him.

Max Mini/Mosaic/Nova vs. Battalion/El Torito/Tarantula

Yep it’s a mini match. Sunny is referee here to give anyone a reason to care. The three faces combine to weigh less than 260lbs. That’s just amusing. They kept having these matches for no apparent reason other than an attempt at capitalizing on the Luchador craze, which I guess was a better idea than trying to use bad luchadors like they would do in a few months. Max weighs 87lbs and is very fast if nothing else.

Everyone has very generic gimmicks with Batallion being an army guy or something. We’re about two minutes into this and we just saw our 8th arm drag. It’s Trios rules here as in if one of the guys goes to the floor, that’s the same as a tag. We go split screen to look at Tyson who looks like he’s hamming it up for the camera, and to his credit he looks genuine at least. Like I’ve said a dozen times: if you don’t want to be there, at least try to look interested, and Tyson is certainly doing that.

The crowd doesn’t care about anyone in there other than Max. For no apparent reason, Sunny helps Max throwing dropkicks at the other guys. It made no sense but it got a pop so there we go. We hit the floor and there they go. It’s your standard everyone runs to the ropes and hits a big move and it works really well here.

I’ll say this for these guys: they’re not boring. They’re not particularly interesting but they’re not boring either. Max goes to the top (which to be fair is like from the top of a cage for a normal size guy) and hits a rana which leads to a cradle for the pin. This was so far ahead of last year’s Lucha stuff that I can’t even see it back there.

Rating: B-. Again, it wasn’t great, but it was exciting if nothing else. It kept you paying something close to attention so that’s better than nothing at all. Max was more over than all 5 other guys combined so it was smart to have him be the focus of the match.

Granted that might be because he was by far the most talented. Compared to last year’s old guys doing nothing for 11 minutes, this was a good deal shorter at about 8 minutes which helped it out a lot. That doesn’t sound like a lot of time, but three minutes can mean a big difference in a match. Think about how many matches you’ve seen that are about three minutes long. A lot of TV matches are, so there’s time to do a good amount of stuff in there. By keeping this one shorter it was FAR better.

The Nation is looking for Austin but all they find is a foam finger.

Vince and Shane are with Tyson. Shane looks so much more comfortable talking to him than Vince does.

We get a recap of Shamrock vs. the Nation, including Henry turning on him to join the Nation. This was when Rock was taking the leadership of the group over from Farrooq and is also IC Champion at the time, having been handed the title after Austin forfeited the belt to go after the World Title. Cole is with the Rock as we cut to a clip from the Free For All of the Nation arguing over who would win the Rumble.

Cole says that apparently there are problems in the Nation. Rock says apparently you’re an idiot. I love Rock ripping on Cole. It was always priceless. Rock offers advice to Clinton, continuing his gimmick of offering his input on social matters of the time as only he could. It helped play up the People’s Champion thing, and more importantly led to an interview with Gennifer Flowers at Mania where he debuted a rather famous line because of it, if you smell what I’m cooking.

Intercontinental Title: Rock vs. Ken Shamrock

Rock comes out alone here. The crowd is way behind Shamrock here as Rocky was flat out hated. We start with a fairly long feeling out period and then we all of a sudden get going. Shamrock is pretty good at the moves he could do, but the problem is he didn’t have a ton of things that he could do well. Since we’re in the Attitude Era, there’s a lot of brawling going on here which makes sense for Shamrock at least.

What doesn’t make sense though is Rock being able to go toe to toe with Shamrock in that area. If he’s supposed to be the best fighter of all time like JR keeps telling us, Rock is amazing then. In an amusing bit, Rock goes for a chinlock but does the arm motion that he would do for the People’s Elbow by swinging his arm around really slowly to hook the chinlock on. I love that.

JR says this isn’t the seniors’ tour which is a clear jab at WCW and how much they messed up the previous month’s show. As Shamrock goes insane, here’s Kama to allow Rock to get some knucks to knock out Shamrock. Now in a brilliant move Rock puts them in Shamrock’s tights. Ken kicks out and hits a belly to belly for the pin and the title. Rock gets up a bit later and says to check his tights. You can see the ending coming from here and the decision is reversed.

In a great moment, the referee is checking his tights and points to the crotch and asks what is that? It’s as humorous as it sounds. Yep, the referee gets the ankle lock too. They would do a similar screw job ending at Mania where Shamrock was named the winner again but didn’t get the title again. Rock would finally lose the belt at Summerslam in an epic ladder match with HHH. On a replay we see Rocky hitting him with the knucks.

We also see the problem with it as the knucks are on the back of Rock’s hand, but the way Rock throws punches, the part where the brass is sticking out wouldn’t have touched Ken’s head, but why should we care about that?

Rating: C+. This was what it was. It wasn’t meant to be anything great and they didn’t try to make it something it wasn’t which is the smart thing to do. The ending was at least somewhat creative so they get points for that. I don’t get why they did the same kind of ending at Mania, but whatever. This was fine. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t terrible given what they had to work with here.

We see exclusive footage of Rock in his locker room taking off his boots when Shamrock jumps him. For some reason Shamrock has had time to take a shower and put on jeans while Rock doesn’t even have his boots off yet, despite Rock having left first.

Los Boricuas are looking for Austin. They find the DOA instead and of course they fight like they did for months. I think a combined 5 people cared in all those fights.

We recap the LOD vs. the Outlaws which more or less consists of old school vs. new and it’s not that interesting but it’s ok I guess. Basically the LOD are old and cool and the Outlaws are jerks. Nothing is different I guess. Oh and they beat up the LOD and shaved Hawk’s head while wearing Cartman shirts. Seeing South Park being considered cutting edge and underground stuff is just ridiculous to think of.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Legion of Doom

They’re wearing Favre jerseys for no apparent reason. Oh apparently Favre just beat the 49ers and we’re in the Bay Area. Hawk and Animal look at clips of them being beaten up and say that this is about pride or something. Animal is completely insane in this promo. Why are the LOD referred to as American Originals? I’ve never gotten the point to that reference. I’m sorry to shock those of you with heart conditions, but this starts out as a brawl. I know I can’t believe it either.

The heels try to run and naturally that doesn’t work at all. JR actually mentions the Horsemen on a WWF program. He follows that up by saying this might be a matter of time, more or less giving away the ending. There’s zero flow to this match at all. It’s just random insanity and I don’t recall any tagging here at all. That’s fine in spurts but it needs some sort of structure to be legitimate at all.

To further the insanity here, Hawk gets handcuffed to the turnbuckle while the injured Animal is beaten on. We shift over to a one on two match here with Animal fighting for all he’s worth. He hits a powerslam and has it won when a chair from Road Dogg breaks it up for the DQ as we STILL can’t have a clean ending in a match that means anything. They start the beatdown, but Hawk and the power of the 80s breaks the handcuff and after a bunch of chair shots, the LOD reign supreme.

Rating: D+. This match can almost sum up everything about the Attitude Era as a whole. You have a classic team like the LOD that got world title shots back in the 80s and then you have these two guys that aren’t great workers to begin with but get heat based off of shock tactics. There was little tagging and most of this match was brawling. There’s the Attitude Era in a few lines.

Some chick in Tennessee wins Austin’s truck.

We get a recap about how Austin is a marked man or whatever. In other words we get a package to futher drill into our heads that Austin will indeed win the Rumble tonight.

Royal Rumble

Fink claims that it’s every 2 minutes for intervals. It’s really closer to 90 seconds if you pay attention and considering the whole thing lasts 56 minutes, 2 minute intervals are impossible unless the last guy is thrown out before he gets to the ring. Cactus Jack is first and apparently Jack, Dude Love and Mankind got into a fight over who would be in the Rumble and Jack won.

Second is Chainsaw Charlie, who is more commonly known as Terry Funk in some weird crazy man gimmick. When I say crazy I mean crazier than usual. He brings a fake chainsaw with him, so Foley throws chairs at both him and it, which produce no sparks. There’s about 5 chairs and a saw in the ring and we’re underway. Aww the referee gets the saw out of the ring. Anyway, Funk says for Foley to blast him with a chair so he does.

Foley hands it to Funk so Funk can have a free shot. This is either cool or mind blowingly stupid. Tom Brandi is 3. Think Santino but less talented and stupider and that’s what you have. In a move that shocks no one, he’s thrown out in about 10 seconds. This is a weird hardcore kind of thing here as Funk has his customary convulsions. Number four is Rock to some weak heat. Ah ok there it is. Foley hits him with a trash can to show off their future hardcore epics.

The hardcore guys beat him up as Lawler is panicking. Mosh is fifth as I’m starting to hate the Attitude Era. He gets the biggest pop of all five guys so far. Naturally Funk goes for the moonsault and it misses. I don’t get the point in having such an insane start to the match. Phineas is 6th. He and Hank are heels here and it just failed on so many levels. More or less they switched to creepier music and wear the rebel flag so now they’re heels.

Yeah it bombed big time, so naturally they were pushed for about another year or so until the company woke up and let Hank go and changed Phineas to Mideon. Funk throws some chops and the wooing begins. Number seven is 8-Ball to continue the greatness of this Rumble. Seriously, considering there’s three world champion out there, this is just boring so far. Funk puts out Cactus as the crowd couldn’t care less.

Allegedly someone has attacked Austin but King won’t say who. Bradshaw replaces Cactus at number 8 to really enhance the greatness in there. Owen Hart is number nine, but Jeff Jarrett and Jim Cornette who were representing the NWA of all things jump him as Ross declares Cornette a stain on the underwear of life. For the love of all things good left in the world, someone lobotomize JR before he hurts himself. For some reason Owen gets huge cheers from Tyson. That’s just odd.

Owen can’t get in the ring and is just laying on the floor. Steve Blackman is tenth. He’s a complete WWF rookie at this point despite having a ton of experience in other companies before this. We mull around even more as the ring is way too full. All of the guys I’ve listed are in other than Jack and Brandi. Owen is still down as number 11 is D’lo Brown. There are 5 members of the Nation in the Rumble tonight which is kind of impressive.

Shamrock may have been the guy that got to Austin. Rock goes the heck off on Blackman with some insanely fast kicks. At this point we’re just waiting on some monster to come out and get rid of some of these guys. No one cares as there is zero chance Austin is going to lose.

Number 12 is Kurrgan. Now this was an interesting character to say the least. He was completely dominant so of course they made him a comedy character by the fall. He gets rid of Mosh so if nothing else he’s done his job. How weird is it to think that Bradshaw of all people would wind up having a 9 month world title reign out of all these guys in there? Mero and Sable come out at 13. Good grief Mero was a depthless character.

Blackman is gone via Kurrgan. Bradshaw beats on him a bit which at least looks kind of cool. Shamrock comes out to a BIG pop. He goes straight for Kurrgan and knocks him down with relative ease to allow a big group of people to dump him out. In 20 seconds, Shamrock has managed to get the crowd to actually cared about the match which the other 12 hadn’t been able to do in almost half an hour. Thrasher comes out at 15.

The ring is WAY too full at this point. There’s a very loud Sable chant. Lawler keeps talking about how he wants to fight Tyson which is just perfectly good cheap heel heat. 16 is Mankind as we hit one of my all time favorite Rumble bits. Yes, all three of Foley’s personas are in the Rumble. He puts out Funk with relative ease. In a very unintentionally funny moment, Shamrock is trying to get Rock out in the corner.

The tape freezes just for a second and Shamrock’s arms are under Rock and his head is laid on his stomach and the look on his face looks like he’s lovingly smiling. It’s just great. Anyway Goldust is 17th and this time he’s rocking a silver body suit with painted on women’s lingerie including g-string. The ring is WAY too full here. I would list them all off for you, but it would be Austin Fodder #1, 2, 3, 4 etc. There’s about 10 guys in there and no one cares about most of them.

Goldust puts out Mankind who wasn’t a big deal just yet. Jarrett is 18th and Owen finally gets in and beats the living tar out of him. After skinning the cat, Owen dumps Jarrett. There’s a big rant coming on Owen later so stick around for that. And from out of nowhere Honky Tonk Man is 19th. Rock puts out Shamrock as HHH and Chyna come out. HHH is hurt and not in the match. Owen tries to get rid of Goldust, allowing HHH and Chyna to use a pair of crutches to eliminate him.

Ok screw waiting for later. At the end of the previous In Your House, Owen had jumped Shawn to end the show, making his first appearance since Montreal. He beat Shawn up and then ran off into the crowd. Every single sign in the world said that Owen vs. Shawn would be the title match at the Rumble. Think about it: Owen comes back to avenge his brother’s honor so the drama and story are already there.

Owen can actually hang with Shawn in the ring so it’s not like the match would be boring or something. Owen was getting insane reactions from the crowds at this point so it’s not like they wouldn’t buy it. So given how obvious this was, Shawn vetoed it. Owen made the epic return and was promptly fed to HHH.

Yes, instead of going with the money match at the Rumble of Owen vs. Shawn, I’m assuming Shawn was afraid that Owen would either upstage him or shoot on him, so he somehow convinced everyone that the best choice was for Owen to just go back down into the midcard and job to HHH and Jarrett and stay far away from the title picture, and showing the power of the Clique, it worked.

Owen was made to look like a joke over the next three months, having a tiny feud with Jarrett that went nowhere and then jobbing to HHH to make him look good. At least Shawn got what was coming to him all those years later in the casket match, which he lobbied for. I hate to say it, but he got what he deserved.

Ahmed Johnson is number 20 and no one cares. He was just completely wasted by this point and it failed miserably. The crowd is pretty much dead here. Lawler lets it slip that Honky is his cousin. We accidentally hear someone say that someone isn’t cleared to wrestle which we’ll get to in just a few moments. Mark Henry is 21st. In a great stat, Henry is one of 17 people in this Rumble that have never been in one before.

Ross says Henry is handling the big Johnson. I’m not going near that one. There is no number 22 and everyone thinks it was supposed to be Austin. It turns out that it was supposed to be Skull, but he was hurt earlier in the attack by the Boricuas and was who the accidental voice was talking about. Phineas and Ahmed are gone with Phineas landing on a referee in an amusing spot. The crowd really couldn’t care less here.

Kama is number 23, and here’s the best recap I can give you: Rock, 8-Ball, Bradshaw, D’Lo, Mero, Thrasher, Goldust, Honky, Henry and Kama. Holy jobber fest Batman. Austin it 24th to an EPIC pop. I mean the fans went insane for that glass shattering. Literally everyone in the ring turns to the entrance to jump him, but he comes through the crowd and knocks out Mero and 8-Ball with relative ease.

Why in the world did they insist on constantly making Brown a big deal or at least trying to? Never mind he’s been upstaged by the failure that is heel Henry Godwin. We start the final five with Savio, who leads the completely worthless Boricuas who all go after Austin despite not being in the match. Naturally they’re easily dispatched. There are WAY too many people in there. I’m counting 11 I think.

Farrooq is 27th as all 5 members of the Nation are in there now. Naturally he beats on all of the other 4 members. I’ve always thought they missed the boat with Farrooq. He was clearly a great athlete with a solid character yet they never pulled the trigger on him. Rock and Austin go to the floor through the ropes. Dude Love is 28th which gets a nice pop. Foley was such a brilliant character when you think about it.

Kane was Isaac Yankem and Fake Diesel etc. Kama was Papa Shango, Godfather etc. The thing is, those other characters are never mentioned. They’re simply repackaged to give them a fresh start and that’s fine. Foley took it completely the other way. They made him all three characters at once with no attempt at hiding it. That’s very unique and I don’t think it’s been done otherwise. Anyway he puts out Bradshaw in about a second.

Rock does the overrated elbow on Brown and gets beaten up by Austin for it. At least Austin recognizes overrated moves. Chainz, another guy I thought could have been more than he was, is 29th making Vader number 30. There goes Brown to lighten us up a bit.

Ok, so with all 30 in, here are your possible winners: Rock, Thrasher, Goldust, Honky, Henry, Kama, Godwin, Vega, Farrooq, Dude Love, Chainz, Vader and Austin. I wonder who the win…never mind that joke is just stupid. Who thought it was a good idea to have 13 people in at the end? Vader puts out Honky. The crowd still doesn’t care at all. There goes Thrasher to a tiny pop.

Kama is gone as we’re starting to clear the ring out. Ross thinks Brown is still in for some reason. There goes Vega as Austin has dropped three in a row now. Goldust puts out Vader because Vader can’t do anything since he’s an over character. Instead we have to have a freak character be put over again. Henry and Goldust go out. Farrooq just shows off by throwing out Henry.

Chainz was put out by Austin over the corner and slammed into the steps which just looked SICK. The final four are Farrooq, Rock, Dude Love and Austin. I’ve always loved Dude’s Sweet Shin Music. Farrooq eliminates Dude. Say that out loud and see how ridiculous it sounds. Ross is ticked off for some reason at Rock resting while Farrooq fights Austin.

Farrooq was in for about 10 minutes while Rock had already wrestled earlier and had been in over 50 minutes at this point. I guess according to JR that’s nothing. Anyway the final two are Rock and Austin. They slug it out and the fans are buying every bit of it. After a Stunner Austin shocks no one as he’s going to Wrestlemania.

Tyson is happy too. We get a quick interview with Tyson, who despite calling Austin Cold Stone, which to be fair sounded far more like a slip of the tongue rather than him just not knowing what he was saying, says he’s very happy and looking forward to the main event. If nothing else, he’s very enthusiastic and sounds like a legit fan.

Rating: D+. This was a bad Rumble in every sense of the word. The big problem here is clear so I’ll ignore that. The problem is there’s no one out there that was even a potential challenger. There was almost no flow to this either. The closest thing to a story was the Nation but it got no play at all.

That’s the problem here: there’s no story or drama at all and it just crippled the thing. We knew Austin would win, but the question was how. The problem was there was no way to disguise the fact that he was going to win and it really hurt the match. There really was no way to make this great, but they at least could have made it ok.

We recap Taker vs. Shawn. More or less they were trying to just pick up their rivalry from the fall like nothing ever happened. Good night Shawn took a beating in the Cell. Kane has broken away from Paul Bearer and apparently has joined Taker to help him fight off DX. For some reason Taker accepted his brother that hated him with no issue at all. I’ll give you two guesses as to how that’s going to work out.

Casket Match: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Fink looks REALLY weird for some reason here. It looks like he’s being forced to announce at gunpoint or something. We get a weird comment from JR about Shawn: He may not be in a class of his own but it doesn’t take long to call the role. Wait, what? If he’s the world champion and the best big match guy ever, why wouldn’t he be in a class of his own? Also, Ross tries to say HBK has a better record in big matches than anyone including Hogan. That’s just laughable.

Shawn’s overselling of Taker putting the lights back on is great. Shawn of course has to run here and punch where he can, but we get my favorite spot that Taker keeps using as he just grabs Shawn by the throat and throws him into the corner. I’ve always loved that. In a very cool spot, Shawn goes for a crossbody from the middle rope and Taker catches him in a two handed choke. That looked great. And there it is.

Shawn is backdropped over the top rope and slams him back on the casket, more or less shattering it and putting him on the shelf for four and a half years after Wrestlemania. You can tell something just isn’t right with him at this point, and oddly enough a fan shouts out BREAK HIS BACK while Taker is beating Shawn up. As usual, Taker is just beating the living heck out of Shawn.

That’s your formula for the majority of this match: Taker beats up Shawn, Shawn hits a little something, Taker beats up Shawn some more. Eventually Shawn hits a kick out of nowhere, but Taker doesn’t really do much about it. We go near the casket a few times which is always good, but the best part is Shawn in the casket and trying to get out while Taker pulls him back in.

It’s a very cool shot that’s been done many times since but never as well as there. Eventually the tombstone hits and Shawn is dead, but Los Boricuas (which is incorrect grammar but whatever) and the Outlaws run out.. Cue Kane, but of course he turns on Taker to throw him in the casket to keep the title on Shawn. That’s not the end though, as Kane nails Taker into the casket and starts walking it back up the stage.

In one of the most famous scenes of his career, he covers it in “gasoline” and lights it on fire. JR is FREAKING as we go off the air. Of course Taker magically disappeared from the casket, setting up his return just in time for a Mania match with Kane.

Rating: B. This one is hard to mess up. These two worked very well together and this was no exception. They’re just perfectly suited to one another and they showed why here. Granted they more or less did the exact same thing as they did in the Cell, but it still worked.

Obviously the bigger story here is Shawn’s back, but that’s been covered more elsewhere because no one knew how bad he was hurt at this point. The match was fine, but it was clearly more about the angle than the match, which is ok here.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a show where the individual matches don’t add up to the final grade. This is a lot more like a transition show than anything else, with most of what you see here just setting up stuff for later on. It set up Shawn vs. Austin which had to happen for the company to survive as well as Taker vs. Kane, but other than that there’s just not much here.

I really didn’t like this show all that much, but it was ok I suppose. There have been worse Rumbles, but not that many. Watch it if you haven’t seen it before I guess, but you likely won’t want to again.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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In Your House #21: Unforgiven: It’s Getting Hot In Here

Unforgiven: In Your House #21
Date: April 26, 1998
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 21,427
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The opening video focuses on Undertaker vs. Kane which is the bigger story coming into this show.

Nation of Domination vs. Faarooq/Ken Shamrock/Steve Blackman

Henry comes back in and drops some elbows for a somewhat delayed two count, allowing Faarooq to pound away and make a tag off to Blackman. Henry runs Steve over but takes his time covering again. Back to Brown for a middle rope elbow and a standing one to the jaw for two. Rock comes in and stomps away in the corner while talking a lot of trash.

European Title: Owen Hart vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

HHH gets his leg caught in the ropes for a bit as Owen goes over to look at Chyna. That gets boring though so Hart DDTs HHH and puts on the Sharpshooter. The cage is lowered though and Chyna gets to the ground so Owen breaks the hold. Slaughter holds Chyna back as X-Pac (new DX member) comes in to blast Owen with a fire extinguisher to keep the title on HHH.

Post match Owen says enough is enough, which meant a heel turn for him.

NWA World Tag Team Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. New Midnight Express

Sable vs. Luna Vachon

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. LOD 2000

Lawler gets out some marshmallows and hot dogs to roast during the inferno match.

Kane vs. Undertaker

With little else to do to each other in the ring, Undertaker throws Kane over the top rope and over the flames. Kane tries to walk out so Bearer bullies the guy in charge of the flames into turning them up even higher. Before Kane can get away though, Vader returns to fight Kane back to ringside. Undertaker dives over the top rope to take them both out in a great visual.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. Dude Love

Dude jumps Austin from behind but Austin pounds away on him in the corner to take over. An elbow sends Dude to the floor before a Thesz Press takes Love down back inside. Austin hits a snapless spinebuster and an elbow drop for two before having to chase Dude up the aisle. They head back to the music stage with Austin slamming Foley down and hiptossing him off the stage and down onto the floor in a big crash.

Back and ringside and a clothesline puts Love down again before they get back in the ring. Love avoids a running hip attack to the ropes and bulldogs Austin down for two. Steve explodes out of the corner with a clothesline but Dude gets in a shot to the ribs to put him down again. Dude puts on a bodyscissors with a choke as Vince and the Stooges come out to watch. Austin fights out of the hold with a bunch of elbows to the face but stops to look at Vince, giving Dude a rollup for two.

Steve wraps both legs around the post and does the same to the arm for good measure. They head back to the floor with Love backdropping out of a piledriver attempt on the concrete. Austin is sent into the barricade so Vince can go laugh at him like the evil monster he is. Steve gets up but Dude saves his boss from probably death. Dude knocks Austin off the apron and Vince tells Austin to be a man and get back in.

A long stretcher job by Vince ends the show.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 1998 (Original): He Did It

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 1998
Date: November 15, 1998
Location: Kiel Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 21,779
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Now this is a time when a year can completely change things around. Shawn and Bret are gone due to Montreal and injuries. Austin is the undisputed king of professional wrestling, and the WWF is back on top in the ratings war. The Attitude Era is in full swing as we have no world champion. With Vince hating Austin completely, he booked Austin in a triple threat for the belt at a PPV.

They double pinned Austin, leading to a one on one match at the previous PPV with Austin as the referee. Austin declared himself as the winner, leading to tonight’s 14 man tournament for the belt. It’s the first Survivor Series match to not have any traditional Survivor Series matches, but the tournament can be viewed as surviving so that’s fine and good. Other than the tournament, there’s a tag title match and a women’s title match. It’s a 14 match card, so let’s get to it.

We get a montage of people talking about how they’ll do whatever it takes to get the title. Remember that for later. The tagline for this show was Deadly Game, which came complete with a catchy song for it. Youtube it as it’s not bad at all. I remember watching this show with a buddy of mine and we were freaking about who could win this.

We were both complete marks at the time, but about a year or two later he would discover a place called Wrestlezone and mention it to me. My life changed forever. Ok so it took 6 years for me to click on the forums part and THEN it changed but you get the idea.

Apparently Vince did the brackets for the tournament. The first round matches are maximum ten minutes, so that’s a plus. Here are your brackets.

Undertaker
BYE

Kane
BYE

Rock
HHH

Goldust
Shamrock

Mankind
???

Jeff Jarrett
Al Snow

X-Pac
Regal

Austin
Boss Man

Kane and Taker were technically both champion before, hence the byes. Rock and HHH in the first round? That’s a heck of an opening match.

We open with…Vince. Yep, the first thing we hear is Vince has something to say. He has a broken ankle at the time thanks to Kane and Taker so he’s got a ton of help. This was actually a big show because for once we’re guaranteed a new world champion. That’s a rare thing. Oh he’s doing the announcing tonight.

First Round: Mankind vs. ???

Mankind was just flat out awesome at this point, as he often was. He was being completely suckered in by Vince to do his bidding because he was dumb enough to believe and trust Vince. Naturally, Vince used him to do his dirty work. As a reward, he gave him a joke: the Hardcore title, which became the hottest thing in the world for all of a week. Also, when Vince was in the hospital, Mankind visited him and debuted Mr. Socko.

He comes out in a tux with the mask, the belt and the sock on. That’s just priceless. He still has that classical music theme as well which is just humorous. There was a HUGE rumor going on at this time that the mystery wrestler would be Shawn Michaels, with even the fans chanting HBK. Josh, the guy I was watching the show with, looked at each other and said no way. He was just too hurt from Mania.

Vince puts on his glasses to read a statement about the opponent. He debuted in 1990, he had a win/loss record that couldn’t be compared to anyone else’s. He jumped ship to WCW but a shoulder injury had kept him out for two years. You can tell the audience is really puzzled over who this is going to be. It’s Duane Gill. No one, and I mean NO ONE got this. Gill was a jobber that never won a match on WWF TV.

This would be like bringing Reno Riggins in for a match. The fans are TICKED. His video is him taking a bunch of people’s finishing moves. He pulls an Eric Young and is scared of his pyro. Apparently he coaches an elementary school football team. I wish my elementary school had a football team. Anyway, the match lasts about 30 seconds. Mankind hits a double arm DDT and uses a rolling ¾ nelson, and I’m not making that up, to get the pin.

This was actually significant, in that it seemed as if Vince was hand picking Mankind to win the tournament. Also, JR mentions Mr. and Mrs. Foley’s baby boy, which is kind of sad as Foley’s father passed away yesterday. From what I read in Have a Nice Day, he was a good man. That’s sad.

Rating: N/A. This will be likely for a lot of matches tonight. How can I rate a thirty seconds match? Eight days later, Gill would win the Light Heavyweight Title (beating Christian of all people) and become Gillberg. I’m sure you’re familiar with that.

We see a clip of Sable getting beaten up by Jackie on Heat and then Cole is in her locker room. Sable as always is a whiny witch that can’t act or fight. She really annoys me most of the time.

First Round: Jeff Jarrett vs. Al Snow

The winner here gets Mankind. Jarrett has Debra McMichael with him now. I know you know who that is but that’s what they call her here. There’s a guy with a sign that says Jarrett is the guy you hate to hate. Does that mean he likes Jarrett? Also there’s a sign that says I need Head. When I saw that I forgot about Snow, so I was surprised. For once, Debra actually looks hot. Snow’s pop is MASSIVE.

He really could have been a solid midcard guy. He certainly had the crowd support. Apparently Snow has stolen Socko, so Foley’s was a forgery. Snow is just freaking creepy on a lot of levels. He lands a sweet cartwheel over the top rope to counter an Irish whip. That was awesome. This is actually a pretty good little fast paced match. Obviously they’re not going to get enough time to blow anyone away, but I like what I’m seeing so far.

These are two guys that can go in the ring and if they were given enough time, this would have been a very good match I think. Both guys get the others’ weapons but Snow gets hit with Head in the back which doesn’t even knock him down. He gets Head from Jarrett and gives Head to Jarrett’s head to end this.

I wanted to see more of the match and less Head. Ross points out that the next WWF Champion could be holding a severed head wearing a tube sock. That sums up the Attitude Era. Debra has nice legs.

Rating: B+. This is hard to grade, but I really liked the little bit that I got to see. Both guys were crisp in the time that they had and it’s a match that you don’t get to see that often. I like Snow’s in ring work more than Jarrett’s so I’m happy here.

First Round: Big Boss Man vs. Steve Austin

There’s no transition here at all as we just go from match to match. I’m not a fan of that style. The pop for Austin is just ridiculous. He had been fired by Vince but Shane hired him back for 5 years. Amazingly, he wouldn’t last in the company that long. They brawl in the aisle to start as this is Vince vs. Austin in essence. Oh there’s the bell so that was pre match stuff. This is really just a fast forwarded match.

It’s a brawl as you would expect, but it’s just not that entertaining because they have less than four minutes to do anything. We see a split screen of Vince, Slaughter and Patterson watching this. There’s no Brisco so I’m assuming he and Patterson broke up for awhile. The announcers point out that Bossman might just be here to beat up Austin instead of advancing, so Boss Man is your Andre the Giant and Vince is your Ted DiBiase in this tournament with Austin as Hogan.

At least they waited ten years to recycle the tournament PPV formula. They go to the floor and Boss Man drills him with the night stick in front of the referee to end it while advancing Austin. Wouldn’t it have been smarter to try to beat him now? If nothing else you can beat on him and then also possibly take him out.

The result is the same but it takes more out of Austin and it could potentially eliminate him period. I’m no evil genius though. Austin gets a pop for winning despite having his face beaten in at the moment. The beating goes on way too long as shockingly they’re short on time I guess.

Rating: D. Again, it’s not even four minutes and 40 seconds of it is a rest hold. What do you want me to say here? It was bad for the most part, but it was all storyline here anyway so that’s fine I suppose. You have to love the Russo style here of flash with limited actual wrestling involved. That’s always a good thing to have.

Cole is with Vince and asks him if he’s worried that Austin has advanced. Vince of course isn’t.

First Round: X-Pac vs. Steven Regal

Winner gets Austin and X-Pac is European Champion here. This match is completely made of win because of one reason: we get to hear Regal’s MAN’S MAN SONG!!! Oh I’m all giddy.

Regal was fired for working VERY stiff against Goldberg and making him look awful in the ring so he came to Vince and this is what he got for his trouble. It’s since become one of the most popular gimmicks ever, based on how absolutely freaking SWEET the song is. Apparently mixing concrete makes you a man. My grandmother is a REAL MAN’S MAN. Ross is on this weird kick of saying how old everyone is tonight.

King starts singing the song. He should stick to Wimpbusters. Pac gets a sweet spin kick early on. He’s against a smaller man so this should be decent. After saying how old Pac is (26), he calls Regal Blackman twice in a row. King points this out to him and of course Ross is offended. He got the idea from Regal being from Blackpool. At least that makes sense. The fans don’t like Regal so he poses for them.

In a cool looking move, Regal uses a slingshot, but instead of the corner X-Pac just lands on his face. That was awesome. Regal puts on a bad looking submission, which prompts Ross to say he’s looking for a submission. Well gee Jim thanks. I thought he was looking for 38 cents he lost in my couch last Thursday. Vince and co. are looking on as apparently Brisco bought Patterson a flower so they’re ok now. Brisco says that Austin will face neither guy.

In another odd looking but cool spot, for some reason X-Pac and Regal are both face down and Regal has his legs wrapped around Pac’s head. Pac flips forward and grabs the legs. So he’s laying next to Regal but is pulling backwards on his crossed legs in the same way you would for a Sharpshooter while lying down. That’s quite freaky looking. For no apparent reason, they argue over who Jesse Ventura would want to win. X-Pac holds his neck and clearly shouts OH SNAP.

As good as this match has been, X-Pac using the Bronco Buster just drains it. I can’t make it clear enough how much I hate that move. It looks completely ridiculous, so it’s become a staple of the product. They go to the floor and fight over a suplex but both guys get counted out to send Austin to the final four. That was good while it lasted. Vince isn’t happy but he wants overtime.

BUT WAIT!

Vince gets his wish, and we have a five minute overtime. The Fink calls it sudden death, but isn’t every match sudden death? X-Pac can’t fight because he’s hurt, so it’s over. Shouldn’t Regal just move on if they’re redoing the match? Apparently not which makes ZERO sense but whatever. Also, if Vince made the brackets why didn’t he give Austin someone harder than Regal or X-Pac in the second round?

Rating: B. This was another match that I wanted to see more of. This is the problem with big one night tournaments: you can’t see everything you want to. These guys got about 8 minutes though so I guess that’s pretty good.

They worked well together and if I’ve said it once I guess I’m now saying it twice: X-Pac needed to only fight average or small guys. His stuff goes through the roof against them because it looks believable that what he’s doing would be effective. For some reason they never got that. Anyway, this was quite good in my eyes.

First Round: Ken Shamrock vs. Goldust

Shamrock is the IC Champion at this point. The in the zone thing was always humorous to me for some reason. You know since he first got to the WWF, Goldust has really had no gimmick. I know that sounds ridiculous but think about it. What does he do that’s odd anymore? He has the stupid random stuttering thing but that’s once in awhile. Other than that, he’s just a guy in face paint and a weird looking costume.

The movie thing is gone, the inhaling is gone, everything is pretty much gone. He’s just Goldust. I guess that comes with being a veteran though. Apparently after leaving his wife and responsibilities last year he’s back with them now and Terri is pregnant again, but he’s leaving her. This would lead to the female stable known as PMS which was just a mess. Shamrock has won two tournaments already this year so he could be a big favorite in this one which makes sense.

Ross says he likes the ten minute time limits and I’m disagreeing with him again. They should have gone with longer matches and just 8 people. Honestly, would anyone have missed Regal and Pac in there? There had to be four others you could drop in there somewhere. As Ross talks about how great an IC Champion Shamrock is, you can hear the referee say “get it back in the middle of the ring and you have three minutes.” Well that’s good to know.

Shocky was right. It completely sucks the life out of a match. Shamrock is just dominating here as there was never any doubt he would move on. Goldust is another guy you could drop from this. He was just a jobber at this point living off of past success. My goodness I popped in the wrong show. I wanted the 98 show not the 09 one. Oh never mind.

It’s just that Goldust hasn’t done anything in 11 years. My mistake. He goes for Shattered Dreams which misses as Shamrock hits a sloppy top rope hurricanrana. That leads to the belly to belly and the ankle lock for the tap. Thankfully JR didn’t say tapping like a drunk man, because THAT MAKES NO SENSE.

Rating: D+. This was just boring. In something that won’t be said often tonight, that went on too long. It was a complete squash and just wasn’t any good. Granted it was supposed to be just an easy win for Shamrock so at least they got that right. Waste of a match though as 14 people is just too many.

After cutting back to see Shamrock leaving for about a second, Cole has an update on Austin. After the update, we know nothing new.

First Round: Rock vs. HHH

Rock’s pop isn’t that special actually. The winner gets Shamrock. Apparently Vince doesn’t like Rock either. I don’t think there was a reason given for that but whatever. HHH gets a good pop as this is a rematch from the epic ladder match from Summerslam which played a big part in Rock turning face. As the DX song and video plays, we get the Stooges. HHH isn’t here tonight apparently due to injury.

They try to play it off as a no show but it’s actually a knee injury. Rock’s sideburns are odd looking. Patterson says that there won’t be a forfeit and the replacement is Boss Man again. Boss Man gets a running start to the ring and it’s over. In the fastest match in company history, Rock wins in four seconds by grabbing Boss Man as he gets in and rolling him up as the bell is ringing.

Rating: A. For are you kidding me? Like I can grade this. So Jericho and Boss Man are eternally linked, as Jericho beat Rock and Austin in one night and Boss Man lost to them both in one night. In something that I really laugh at, the slow motion replay is a full ten seconds long. That’s just great.

Here’s your updated brackets.

Undertaker
Kane

Shamrock
Rock

Mankind
Al Snow

Austin
Bye

Hmm, which of these people don’t fit in with the other six?

Quarter Finals: Kane vs. Undertaker

This is the next chapter in the absolute never ending feud with Taker and Kane. Paul Bearer is with Taker again. The second round matches are 15 minutes. Bearer joined Taker again when he co won the title. This is happening because both guys pinned Austin at Judgement Day. Apparently cursing someone can be forgiven provided storylines need it. Both entrances here are just sweet, but WAY too long.

How ridiculous is it that we’re on the seventh match of the night already? It’s always amused me that Kane is supposed to be this freak that’s been kept away from society all his life, yet he’s a trained wrestler. Also, why is it that no one has ever physically dominated the Undertaker like everyone that faces him? Listen to any feud that Taker has with a big man and I guarantee that Ross will say that about him. It gets old after awhile.

Again, this is a fast paced version of what could be a good match. There’s a natural chemistry here between these two that never fails to at least be watchable. Taker actually sets up for a figure four. That’s just an odd idea. He’s going for the leg. Is that psychology from the master of the psych out?

Kane actually jumps over the top rope to get to the top for the clothesline. He follows it up with a chokeslam as Bearer gets on the apron. Thanks to the distraction, Taker gets the Tombstone to end it, despite Kane’s foot being under the rope.

Rating: C-. This was somewhere between a bad and fast fight and a train wreck. The time limit and lack of emotion here are clear, which is the stupid part of tournaments. Taker could barely beat Kane with three Tombstones in 25 minutes at Mania, yet he beats him here in seven minutes with one. It’s just the fast forwarded version with no time at all to build up stuff.

Quarter Final: Mankind vs. Al Snow

Again, no transition at all and we’re just on the next match. I hate that. It’s a WWF tape and it skips right when they say WWF Title tournament match. That’s just creepy. Vince McMahon has the power to go back in time and change things apparently. You have to love those panda lovers. Since we can’t remember 45 minutes ago, we get a recap of Snow vs. Jarrett.

Apparently Vince stole Socko. After a few minutes of bad and bland offense, Foley gets head from Snow and gets his sock back. He then starts beating Snow’s Head. Yep, it’s getting worse. Snow hits a sit out power bomb/spinebuster that was cool. Socko puts Foley in the final four where he’ll get Steve Austin.

Rating: D. This was just boring. I’m sorry a lot of these are short but there’s just not enough to talk about. My stories/jokes about wrestlers are used earlier in the night and there’s absolutely no story in these matches at all. It’s just two guys filling time in the ring with stupid pointless matches until we get down to the important stuff.

Quarter Final: Ken Shamrock vs. The Rock

Winner gets Taker in the next round. We get a replay of both guys winning, including the whole match against Boss Man. That’s just amusing. This is a rivalry that Rock just flat out lost, yet somehow never lost the belt to him. You have to love WWF logic sometimes. The problem with tournaments is already coming through: it gets tiring seeing the same people every night. The chant is now Shamrock Sucks rather than Rocky Sucks, so there we go.

Shamrock was kind of limited as a character in the same was Benoit was. He was great at submission stuff, but he had little to his character and it hurt things for him. There was really no emotional investment to be made with his character and it was very clear. Ok, he’s a great fighter and submission guy. Why should we care? And that is why Benoit’s title reign failed, along with the fact that the real main events were HHH vs. Shawn during his time with the belt, but whatever.

You can tell they’re a bit tired also. I know they have the endurance to go longer than they’ve gone so far, but for Shamrock at least this is his second match. It must be draining to get yourself up for a match then have to do it again. Rock had a 4 second thing so I can hardly count that as a match. Speaking of the devil, here comes Boss Man. He sucks too according to the people.

I’ll give the crowd this: they’ll let you know what they think of you. Shamrock initiates his ending sequence and hooks the ankle lock, but since Rock is a face now it doesn’t get the tap. Boss Man still hasn’t actually done anything so at least he’s living up to his previous reputation. We get a double clothesline so both can take a quick rest. There’s really not a lot of interesting stuff in this match as the first six minutes or so were nothing more than just uninteresting back and forth offense.

Rock gets a low blow and the People’s Elbow but Shamrock kicks out. STOP EVERYTHING! JR DID NOT LIKE THAT CALL! Well, I guess that means we have to stop the show and redo the whole tournament. JR isn’t happy, and when JR isn’t happy, the world must bow to his wishes or dare we try to face the horrors of a JR disrespect rant.

It’s been at least a month since he last complained and whined so he must need to here soon. Rock Bottom is countered into a belly to belly, but Boss Man throws Shamrock the nightstick but Rock intercepts it and drills Shamrock for the pin. That’s a very un People’s Champion like thing to do isn’t it?

Rating: C-. This was just not that good. It was about eight and a half minutes, but they were just going through the motions to a dangerous degree. The last two minutes of it or so were fine, but other than that this was just dull. The fans didn’t really care that much either since until you get to the final four like will be up next, why should we care really? It’s just random matches that aren’t going to mean anything until later on, so why care? I certainly don’t.

Final Four:

Rock
Undertaker

Mankind
Austin

What are the odds that the four biggest names in the company would be the final four? I never for the life of me would have guessed that.

Paul Bearer says Taker will win.

Women’s Title: Sable vs. Jacquelyn

Oh this is going to SUCK. At this time, Sable was supposed to be the best women’s wrestler of all time, but there was one small problem: SHE SUCKED. Sable was over completely for her looks and nothing more. At Summerslam she had the most disgusting match I had ever seen, as Edge did all of the work for her yet Sable got every single bit of the credit. I hated that to no end.

It was always all about Sable and making sure she was happy when she was just horrid in the ring. She’s the epitome of everything that is wrong with women’s wrestling today. She’s there because she looks good in a swimsuit and she can barely wrestle safely let alone wrestle well. Because she has a massive chest though, she’s getting a lot of TV time. Ross says he watched Lawler every day and learned a lot from him.

There’s something you don’t hear every day. Apparently Sable has been training extra hard for this match. That can’t be a good sign. She uses the TKO, which is a cool move, but of course she does it wrong and lands on her knee, making the move look completely weak. Mero pulls her out though to prevent the three. I knew I hated him for some reason. Shane is the referee here as he’s being punished by Vince for being a bad little boy.

Sable hits her bad powerbomb on Mero on the floor, nearly breaking his neck. Why is that supposed to be impressive anyway? Oh look she can do sloppy moves on men. BIG FREAKING DEAL! Jackie has part of Sable’s hair that she cut off a few weeks ago. That’s just creepy.

At least she can wrestle, and with her on offense, not only is it better, but Sable gets beaten up. And just as I say that Sable counters to take over again. After another bad powerbomb and NO build to it, Sable is the Women’s Champion. Just shoot me now.

Rating: D. It was three minutes long, and most of that was sloppy. Once again, the attractive yet untalented wrestler gets the belt. Ross immediately says she’ll be the first to say she’s not the most polished but she’s worked the hardest. That’s the nice way of saying we know she sucks but she’ll have a photo shoot a week now for all the 12 year olds watching.

Semi Finals: Mankind vs. Steve Austin

We get recaps of both guys’ victories from earlier in the night in case we forgot already. I’ll never get why Vince thinks we’re that stupid. Remember Austin got beaten up earlier by Boss Man who has now been involved in three matches. I’m sick of him already. Vince and the Stooges come out after Austin hits Mankind with a slipper. You read that right and it’s better if you don’t ask. Foley is in the shirt and pants now so he’s looking a bit more like his traditional self.

In a weird sequence, Austin and Foley are fighting, and Foley hits the floor and, well I guess you could call it sprinting, sprints to the entrance. He’s stopped by Patterson and Brisco, but Austin comes and fights more. That was random. Since it’s the Attitude Era there’s a long brawl on the floor. McMahon won’t let the referee count. Why not? If both guys get counted out then they’re both eliminated so Austin wouldn’t be champion. Isn’t that what Vince ultimately wants?

I guess it’s because Mankind is the hand picked champion? Only in the Attitude Era do you need a scorecard to keep track of a match. It’s time for a bad rest hold now as Foley sits on Austin’s back with his hands on his face. Time for the double clothesline spot because we need to kill even more time. I remember back at Mania 4 they talked a lot about how you had to have stamina to get through one of these.

Call me crazy but I think Savage was in better shape back then than Foley is in now. Granted that’s just a hunch. Foley brings in a chair but it gets kicked in his face, which for some reason isn’t a DQ. It’s another instance of Vince making the rules up as he goes. Austin gets the Stunner but Vince jumps out of his wheelchair to break up the count before hitting the referee. Ross is of course livid but Lawler shouts about how it’s a miracle.

Austin counters the Mandible Claw into another Stunner as Shane runs out for the pin. He gets to two and stops so he can flip Austin a double bird, turning heel and joining Vince again. Austin goes after him and the chase is on. Ross’ shouting of WHAT, WHAT, WHAT the heck is going on is rather amusing. Austin whispers a spot to Mankind who clotheslines him down. Slaughter comes in and grabs Austin while Brisco gets a bad chair shot to Austin for the pin.

Foley looks right at him while he’s doing this but Ross says he might not have seen it. I love spots like that where by simply watching the scene you can tell the announcer is wrong. That’s kind of a weak way to get rid of Austin but that’s just me. They begin the references to Montreal as my head begins to hurt.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t bad but it wasn’t great. Again, it’s just hard to get into a match like this when these two had an great match a few months ago that went about 25-30 minutes while this one just breaks 10. I get the tournament and the time issues, but this is one of the big dangers in it and it shows here. It’s an ok match, but by comparison this isn’t great.

On a side note, Mick Foley might have the best win/loss record against Austin of anyone I can remember after Austin won the title (so no Bret Hart). Think about it. They had two world title matches which were split, Foley pinned him at Summerslam 99 to win the title, and now this. Unless I’m missing a match and I likely am, that’s 3-1. For a guy like Austin, that’s very impressive.

We see Vince and co. running as Vince chases. Austin steals a car, throwing the driver out of it which is funny, and drives off. He’s in his gear, so what would it be like if he got pulled over? That would just be amusing.

We recap what we just saw, and wonder why Shane rehired Austin just to turn heel here.

Semi Finals: Undertaker vs. Rock

Lawler gets in a Groucho Marx line so I’m happy with him again. I didn’t know I was unhappy with him but oh well. Let’s recap both guys getting here because we have nothing better to fill the time up with. This is a rivalry that you don’t see a lot of but it’s certainly an interesting one. Since there was only three minutes of it in the previous match, they brawl on the floor for the early part of this match. Don’t you just love late 90s booking?

They’re in the ring now but they’re going very slowly at the moment. That’s likely better for Taker but for Rock I’d prefer him to go a bit faster. After a lot of slow back and forth stuff, Rock gets tied up in the ropes. He gets out, but even with him standing up and his arms clearly not tied anymore, Taker doesn’t notice. And this guy is supposed to be the master of psychology?

They go to the floor (shocking isn’t it?) and JR points out that if there’s a double count out then Mankind is the new champion. Hearing these words, Lawler screams. That was comical. Ross is wondering how Shane can look himself in the mirror again. Dude it’s wrestling. Ross gets in a small line about how he’s never been in Vince’s house because Vince always fired him elsewhere. Dude, LET IT GO!

Without saying it, Ross points out that there was no point in the face turn for Shane if they were going to turn him heel again this fast. And he’s right. Once again it’s all about the McMahons instead of the actual wrestlers. My goodness Boss Man is here AGAIN. That’s FOUR matches he’s been involved in tonight. That’s as many as whoever is going to win the tournament. In a funny spot, Rock hits a Samoan Drop and does the Taker sit up and the screw you sign to Taker.

Naturally, the announcers are talking about Austin and the McMahons because a solid little comedy moment can’t be acknowledged when Vince has things to do on the show. Rock sets for the elbow but Boss Man hooks his foot and Taker sits up. Now Taker hits Boss Man. In a strange way that makes sense.

Taker chokes Rock as Kane comes in and chokeslams Rock. Lawler thinks they’re back together but it makes sense as Kane just cost Taker a spot in the finals. That’s actually very smart booking. It protects both guys and bangs Rock up for the finals. Kane and Taker fight through the audience.

Rating: B-. It was slow but it was solid. The ending was a bit out there but it made great sense in this case. While not great it’s one of the better matches of the night. Rock and Taker is a pairing that I always wanted to see more of and while they had some short feuds, there was never a huge one and that always puzzled me. Either way, this was good enough but you can tell they’re getting a bit tired.

So the finals are Rock vs. Mankind.

Mankind says he can win tonight, if you smell what the sock is cooking. The look on Cole’s face might be the funniest thing in the history of the Survivor Series.

Tag Titles: New Age Outlaws vs. Headbangers vs. D’lo Brown/Mark Henry

I was going to post the match, but I couldn’t find a version online. The Outlaws are the only tag team in the world worth watching at this point as the Dudleyz were in ECW, Edge and Christian and the Hardys had no clue what they were doing yet, and the Outsiders were kind of feuding. As Road Dogg does his thing, there’s a sign that it’s literally taking 12 people to hold. That’s RIDICULOUS.

On Heat all four guys beat up the Outlaws to try to make it seem like there’s a chance here that we could have new champions here. Spoiler alert: there’s no chance that’s happening here. This is the epitome of a filler match. Billy just doesn’t look right in all black. Naturally the Outlaws get the living tar beaten out of them for most of the match. Did you expect anything else? This is just dragging on forever.

Usually I watch a few minutes of a match and comment on it in here, but I’ve gone 7 minutes here and there’s just nothing to say. It’s not good, it’s not bad, it’s just there. I mean there is nothing at all special about this match that would make me interested in it at all. Ross is talking about the next match which I would be doing as well since there’s just nothing at all here of note.

There are no comedy spots, there are no cool looking sequences, there are no near falls, there’s nothing really bad at all either. It’s just six guys going through the motions and filling in PPV time. Actually 5 since Billy isn’t in this at all for the most part. We get a mixture of finishing moves that do nothing and the Billy hits a random and bad piledriver to end this mess. Post match the Dog says noting of importance.

Rating: F. This was nothing. I mean it was ten minutes of just filler which is awful in my eyes. Some people might like this and I can get that, but for me it was a complete and utter failure. No one with a brain thought there would be new champions tonight, and why should we have? Look at the opponents. This was a waste of time, but it was filler so what can I say?

Since we’re about to have the WWF Title match between Rock and Mankind, let’s talk about Austin and how he got robbed instead. Seriously, that’s all the recap is.

 

WWF Title: Rock vs. Mankind

Mankind apparently doesn’t get what’s going on. He’s not Eugene people. Rock looks more tired now than he did before he rested, but whatever. I almost forgot: Raw was in Rupp Arena the night after this, which is five minutes from my house. For some reason that I’ll never get, I didn’t want to go. The McMahons are still here too. They start with a lockup as most matches do.

Lawler defends Mankind of all things as JR mentions that WWF people will be on the Home Shopping Network in a bit. That’s even odder. Lawler gets in a little jab about how the people will get to see all of this PPV. What he’s referring to is Halloween Havoc 98. It was a double main event with Hogan vs. Warrior and DDP vs. Goldberg.

However, because we just HAD to have matches such as Saturn vs. Lodi and Wrath vs. Meng, the PPV ran long and the feed cut off at 11, right in the middle of the main event and Goldberg’s best match of his career. WCW aired the main event the next night on Nitro, which is both good and bad at the same time.

It’s good in that they get to have a PPV match for free on television because it’s practically a guaranteed ratings boost, but it’s rude to the fans that paid for it because everyone else is getting to see what the PPV fans paid for. Why should everyone else get to see it for free? The little jokes by Lawler and Ross here are amusing. Given the two people that we have in the ring, the inevitable brawl starts almost immediately.

You can tell that the fans are a bit worn out here. This is the fourth match for both guys so it’s not like these two are fresh faces. Three and a half minutes into the match, Vince and Shane, who is dressed as a referee, comes out to ringside. JR is hurt by Shane being a jerk. In that case, I hope Shane prays for forgiveness, for my God have mercy on he that hurts JR. Naturally Rock and Mankind take it to the floor. This is just getting stupid with how much they do this.

And now they’re deep in the crowd. I love how despite them having no real issues other than being in this match, they’re having this wild brawl. That cheapens things, but that’s what the Attitude Era is all about I suppose. We’re back in the ring now and Rock has a chinlock. It never ceases to amaze me how the Attitude Era is known for being all about excitement and intensity, yet most of the matches are really slow and methodical.

Ross more or less says that both guys are spent. Why? Both more or less had a bye in the first round with the longer of the two matches going 33 seconds. Snow isn’t really that tough of an opponent either, so Mankind more or less had a sparring session, a warm-up, and a real match and now this, yet he’s spent? Rock I can kind of understand as he had two decent length matches, but they shouldn’t be sucking wind or anything. I don’t get that.

We’re on the floor again and Mankind uses a chair. Rock counters and gets the steps on him which he beats with the chair. I get that it would hurt, but I don’t think it would be anywhere near as bad as it’s made out to be. Think about it for a minute. The steps are already on him right? Therefore there’s no major impact between them and his body after the initial shot with them. The chair would really just make them vibrate wouldn’t it?

After another brief stint in the ring, it’s naturally time to go back to the floor. Mankind hits the Cactus elbow from the apron to the floor and puts Rock on the announce table. He pulls a Hogan and legdrops him on it but instead of breaking through it Rock just slides off of it. JR is just flat out annoying here, yelling about all kinds of stuff without ever saying anything at all of importance but having all kinds of people likely praise him for it.

We go back in again and hit another chinlock. That’s the pattern of this match: big violent sequence outside and then a chinlock in the ring. After that, redo it but reverse the roles. That’s just kind of stupid when you think about it. This just isn’t that great of a match. It’s ok, but there’s just nothing excellent about it.

For the fourth time in less than fifteen minutes of this match, we go to the floor. Mankind dives from the middle rope through the Spanish table, because that’s just tradition. Back in the ring, Mankind kicks out of the Elbow. Because that move completely sucks, Mankind is up and hits the double arm DDT and grabs the sock.

The Claw gets two arm drops from the Rock but he counters into the Rock Bottom. However, it looks freaking stupid though because he gets Mankind set for it and then waits seven or eight seconds. Ok wait a minute. Why wouldn’t Foley be able to elbow him or something? Rock had been in trouble for awhile and since it can’t take a ton of energy to use the Claw, are we supposed to believe that Foley is drained of energy?

After not getting a pin with it, Rock gives the eyebrow to Vince and sets up a Sharpshooter. Yes, that’s how this ends: a Montreal reference. Rock goes corporate, turning heel and joining Vince as we reveal that Mankind was just a pawn like everyone knew he was and that Rock was Vince’s man the whole time. Vince gets on the mic and says the people screwed the people, just in case we didn’t get the Montreal reference the first time around.

Rock really looks awesome with that belt to be fair. Mankind is in the corner and looks heartbroken. I love how he went from being this clueless putz to being one of the wittiest guys in the company more or less overnight. Vince says the Rock hates the people. Rock gets on the mic and more or less says screw the people. Foley says he never quit as Rock hits him with the belt. In a moment that wasn’t supposed to be funny, Rock has the belt over his shoulder and Vince takes it to put it around his waist.

This takes forever and once he gets it on, within a second or two Rock takes it back off and puts it on his shoulder again. And cue Austin. He hits the ring and we have a Wrestlemania main event. Austin hits a Stunner that amazingly enough Rock sells correctly. He throws Rock and the belt to the floor and then gives Foley a Stunner for no apparent reason.

After beating on the Rock some more, we’re out. In a bonus we have some extra footage of Rock backstage where he just acts like a heel which is completely pointless footage.

Rating: B-. It was certainly ok, but it’s nothing special. More than anything else this benefits from actually having a decent amount of time. I wouldn’t have gone with Austin running in at the end and beating up Rock but rather have just had the three hold up their hands and end like that, but what they did is ok I suppose. Anyway, this was certainly a decent enough match but there was too much brawling for my taste.

Either way, these two had awesome chemistry together and it showed here, but this isone of their weaker matches, but it was their first time so I’ll let that slide. This would lead to what I felt was an outstanding feud between these two with them trading the title back and forth about 3 times over the next three months before Austin finally got his shot at Mania and took the title back.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of the hardest ratings I’ve ever had to do. You simply can’t grade it on the strength of the matches alone because it’s just not that kind of a show. It’s a massive gimmick show, and the problem simply is that by the end, you’re bored with it. This show really would have been better making this a standard eight man tournament instead of the 13 (remember Boss Man fought twice).

It’s easy to eliminate five guys from this. Here: Snow, Goldust, Gill, Regal, X-Pac,. That leaves you with Taker, Kane, Rock, Mankind, Austin, Shamrock, Jarrett, and Boss Man. That’s not a bad field at all. Shamrock stays because of the tournament success and he’s IC Champion and Jarrett wins a battle royal or something or other to get in. For one thing, it cuts off a LOT of time that you could use for other non-tournament stuff which this show is dying for.

Also some of the matches could be say two or three minutes longer which makes them better to me as well. Overall, four matches each is just too much for guys, even if two were jokes. That’s four times the crowd has to pop for you and it just drains the people out. You can really tell this in the main event as there’s next to no pop at all, simply because the fans are popped out. Like I said though, this is one that is completely up in the air.

If you like things like one night tournaments then this is your show. If not, then watch the last four matches. I thought it was fine and it set up Mania, but yeah this would have been MUCH better if there was one less round. I’ll recommend it slightly but with a disclaimer.

WWF Title: Rock vs. Mankind

Mankind apparently doesn’t get what’s going on. He’s not Eugene people. Rock looks more tired now than he did before he rested, but whatever. I almost forgot: Raw was in Rupp Arena the night after this, which is five minutes from my house. For some reason that I’ll never get, I didn’t want to go. The McMahons are still here too. They start with a lockup as most matches do.

Lawler defends Mankind of all things as JR mentions that WWF people will be on the Home Shopping Network in a bit. That’s even odder. Lawler gets in a little jab about how the people will get to see all of this PPV. What he’s referring to is Halloween Havoc 98. It was a double main event with Hogan vs. Warrior and DDP vs. Goldberg.

However, because we just HAD to have matches such as Saturn vs. Lodi and Wrath vs. Meng, the PPV ran long and the feed cut off at 11, right in the middle of the main event and Goldberg’s best match of his career. WCW aired the main event the next night on Nitro, which is both good and bad at the same time.

It’s good in that they get to have a PPV match for free on television because it’s practically a guaranteed ratings boost, but it’s rude to the fans that paid for it because everyone else is getting to see what the PPV fans paid for. Why should everyone else get to see it for free? The little jokes by Lawler and Ross here are amusing. Given the two people that we have in the ring, the inevitable brawl starts almost immediately.

You can tell that the fans are a bit worn out here. This is the fourth match for both guys so it’s not like these two are fresh faces. Three and a half minutes into the match, Vince and Shane, who is dressed as a referee, comes out to ringside. JR is hurt by Shane being a jerk. In that case, I hope Shane prays for forgiveness, for my God have mercy on he that hurts JR. Naturally Rock and Mankind take it to the floor. This is just getting stupid with how much they do this.

And now they’re deep in the crowd. I love how despite them having no real issues other than being in this match, they’re having this wild brawl. That cheapens things, but that’s what the Attitude Era is all about I suppose. We’re back in the ring now and Rock has a chinlock. It never ceases to amaze me how the Attitude Era is known for being all about excitement and intensity, yet most of the matches are really slow and methodical.

Ross more or less says that both guys are spent. Why? Both more or less had a bye in the first round with the longer of the two matches going 33 seconds. Snow isn’t really that tough of an opponent either, so Mankind more or less had a sparring session, a warm-up, and a real match and now this, yet he’s spent? Rock I can kind of understand as he had two decent length matches, but they shouldn’t be sucking wind or anything. I don’t get that.

We’re on the floor again and Mankind uses a chair. Rock counters and gets the steps on him which he beats with the chair. I get that it would hurt, but I don’t think it would be anywhere near as bad as it’s made out to be. Think about it for a minute. The steps are already on him right? Therefore there’s no major impact between them and his body after the initial shot with them. The chair would really just make them vibrate wouldn’t it?

After another brief stint in the ring, it’s naturally time to go back to the floor. Mankind hits the Cactus elbow from the apron to the floor and puts Rock on the announce table. He pulls a Hogan and legdrops him on it but instead of breaking through it Rock just slides off of it. JR is just flat out annoying here, yelling about all kinds of stuff without ever saying anything at all of importance but having all kinds of people likely praise him for it.

We go back in again and hit another chinlock. That’s the pattern of this match: big violent sequence outside and then a chinlock in the ring. After that, redo it but reverse the roles. That’s just kind of stupid when you think about it. This just isn’t that great of a match. It’s ok, but there’s just nothing excellent about it.

For the fourth time in less than fifteen minutes of this match, we go to the floor. Mankind dives from the middle rope through the Spanish table, because that’s just tradition. Back in the ring, Mankind kicks out of the Elbow. Because that move completely sucks, Mankind is up and hits the double arm DDT and grabs the sock.

The Claw gets two arm drops from the Rock but he counters into the Rock Bottom. However, it looks freaking stupid though because he gets Mankind set for it and then waits seven or eight seconds. Ok wait a minute. Why wouldn’t Foley be able to elbow him or something? Rock had been in trouble for awhile and since it can’t take a ton of energy to use the Claw, are we supposed to believe that Foley is drained of energy?

After not getting a pin with it, Rock gives the eyebrow to Vince and sets up a Sharpshooter. Yes, that’s how this ends: a Montreal reference. Rock goes corporate, turning heel and joining Vince as we reveal that Mankind was just a pawn like everyone knew he was and that Rock was Vince’s man the whole time. Vince gets on the mic and says the people screwed the people, just in case we didn’t get the Montreal reference the first time around.

Rock really looks awesome with that belt to be fair. Mankind is in the corner and looks heartbroken. I love how he went from being this clueless putz to being one of the wittiest guys in the company more or less overnight. Vince says the Rock hates the people. Rock gets on the mic and more or less says screw the people. Foley says he never quit as Rock hits him with the belt. In a moment that wasn’t supposed to be funny, Rock has the belt over his shoulder and Vince takes it to put it around his waist.

This takes forever and once he gets it on, within a second or two Rock takes it back off and puts it on his shoulder again. And cue Austin. He hits the ring and we have a Wrestlemania main event. Austin hits a Stunner that amazingly enough Rock sells correctly. He throws Rock and the belt to the floor and then gives Foley a Stunner for no apparent reason.

After beating on the Rock some more, we’re out. In a bonus we have some extra footage of Rock backstage where he just acts like a heel which is completely pointless footage.

Rating: B-. It was certainly ok, but it’s nothing special. More than anything else this benefits from actually having a decent amount of time. I wouldn’t have gone with Austin running in at the end and beating up Rock but rather have just had the three hold up their hands and end like that, but what they did is ok I suppose. Anyway, this was certainly a decent enough match but there was too much brawling for my taste.

Either way, these two had awesome chemistry together and it showed here, but this isone of their weaker matches, but it was their first time so I’ll let that slide. This would lead to what I felt was an outstanding feud between these two with them trading the title back and forth about 3 times over the next three months before Austin finally got his shot at Mania and took the title back.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of the hardest ratings I’ve ever had to do. You simply can’t grade it on the strength of the matches alone because it’s just not that kind of a show. It’s a massive gimmick show, and the problem simply is that by the end, you’re bored with it. This show really would have been better making this a standard eight man tournament instead of the 13 (remember Boss Man fought twice).

It’s easy to eliminate five guys from this. Here: Snow, Goldust, Gill, Regal, X-Pac,. That leaves you with Taker, Kane, Rock, Mankind, Austin, Shamrock, Jarrett, and Boss Man. That’s not a bad field at all. Shamrock stays because of the tournament success and he’s IC Champion and Jarrett wins a battle royal or something or other to get in. For one thing, it cuts off a LOT of time that you could use for other non-tournament stuff which this show is dying for.

Also some of the matches could be say two or three minutes longer which makes them better to me as well. Overall, four matches each is just too much for guys, even if two were jokes. That’s four times the crowd has to pop for you and it just drains the people out. You can really tell this in the main event as there’s next to no pop at all, simply because the fans are popped out. Like I said though, this is one that is completely up in the air.

If you like things like one night tournaments then this is your show. If not, then watch the last four matches. I thought it was fine and it set up Mania, but yeah this would have been MUCH better if there was one less round. I’ll recommend it slightly but with a disclaimer.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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