Survivor Series 2017
Date: November 19, 2017
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,478
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T., Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton

I barely remember this show other than it was a bunch of Raw vs. Smackdown stuff, including AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar. As usual, the modern stuff has no impact on me because so much of it feels like it’s going to be similar to whatever we’re likely to get this year. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Matt Hardy vs. Elias

This is a bonus match, because a four hour show needs more content. Before the match, Elias asks if anyone wants to go for a walk. You can wear red or you can wear blue, but at the end of the day, what would Elias do? The song gets cut off by the booing but he gets it going to talk about how much he hates Houston. Hardy’s music cuts him off again and we’re ready to go. Since it’s a major pay per view and WWE has a really weird way of doing their pre-shows, the are far more empty seats than filled ones opposite the hard camera.

Hardy headlocks him down to start as the announcers start talking about other matches on the show. The Russian legsweep sets up the middle rope elbow to the back of Elias’s head as we take a break. Back with Matt dropping a fist for two but getting his throat snapped across the top rope. Elias switches over to the arm and cranks on an armbar for good measure. The arm goes into the post as Corey talks about getting to see matches we’ve never seen before, such as HHH vs. Shane McMahon. I’d recommend studying your WWE Network before.

The armbar goes on, followed by a double underhook shoulderbreaker for two. Matt gets sent to the apron and Elias follows for some reason, allowing Matt to hit a Side Effect and take over. Back in and Elias gets sent into all three buckles, followed by the bulldog for no cover. Another Side Effect gets two and the middle rope elbow is good for the same. Elias is smart enough to hit him in the arm though and sends it into the post. Drift Away puts Hardy away at 9:16.

Rating: D+. I can never get around the empty seats during these first matches. What in the world is the point of having a match when it’s something that means as little as this and isn’t even any good in the first place? The arm work was fine and it played into the finish, but it was nothing that wouldn’t bore you in the third hour of Raw.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore

Amore is defending and was sent into a cake on 205 Live to really make this personal. Before the match, Enzo goes into a rant about Kalisto sending him into a cake that Enzo paid for. Tonight, Enzo is going to make beef stew out of chicken. Enzo is extra aggressive to start but Kalisto kicks him away without much effort. The chase to the floor is on and Kalisto follows him back in with a slingshot Code Red for two. Kalisto goes to the ropes once too often though and gets his throat snapped as we take a break.

Back with Enzo getting two off a clothesline and pulling him out of the corner into a side slam for the same (cool move). The chinlock goes on for a bit until a running forearm in the corner gets two more. That means a second chinlock with a Stunner not quite breaking the hold. It’s too early for the Salida Del Sol so Enzo puts him in the Tree of Woe, only to miss a charge and hit the buckle.

Kalisto hits a top rope moonsault but his ribs won’t let him get a cover. He’s fine enough to hit the hurricanrana driver but the Salida is broken up again. They slug it out on the apron and Enzo pulls him head first into the rob that connects the buckle to the post. The Jordunzo finishes Kalisto at 8:13.

Rating: D+. That’s one of the better matches I remember from Enzo, which probably had a lot to do with Kalisto being in there to do most of the hard work for him. There was little chance that Enzo was dropping the title here so at least they kept it short, even with a commercial included. Not a good match, but it could have been worse.

Kickoff Show: Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Breezango

Sami is freshly heel here and doesn’t like being stuck having to face losers like Breezango. They should be on Team Smackdown tonight but Shane McMahon is holding them back. It’s all part of the McMahon sibling rivalry but here’s Breezango to cut them off. They got a tip of some fashion violators and all that ungroomed facial hair proves they’re right. That’s bad enough for some violations so Fandango dropkicks Owens down. Owens and Zayn are sent outside where they have fashioned tickets rained down on them as we take a break.

Back with Sami getting sent outside again but Owens gets in a cheap shot this time to put Breeze in trouble. Owens comes in for his usual pummeling but it’s already back to Sami for the chinlock. A kick to the face isn’t enough to get Breeze out of trouble as Owens comes back in for a chinlock of his own. That’s not good enough, so we hit the fourth chinlock in about two minutes.

Owens mixes it up with a backsplash but hits knees, suggesting that he should have stuck with the chinlocks. The hot tag brings in Fandango for the snap jabs and a middle rope dropkick. A tornado DDT gets two with Owens making the save but Fandango misses the Last Dance. The Pop Up Powerbomb finishes Fandango at 8:32.

Rating: D+. Well this concludes the worst Kickoff Show I can remember in a long time. It didn’t seem like Owens and Zayn cared at all here and really, can you blame them? The previous month they were headlining a pay per view and now they’re on the Kickoff Show? That’s the best you can have for these guys? Fair point as that’s the idea of the story. Other than that, I still feel bad for what happened to Breezango as they got themselves over and then were just dropped for….whoever the Smackdown Tag Team Champions were at this point. Does it really matter if they’re that forgettable?

The opening video focuses on the war between Raw and Smackdown, featuring the UNDER SIEGE deal, which was mainly all about Stephanie vs. Shane. I still don’t get how they didn’t have the Usos with the Uso Penitentiary deal leading that charge. The rest of the Raw vs. Smackdown matches get a quick look of their own.

We have a FIVE MAN commentary booth. As usual, quantity equals quality in WWE’s eyes.

New Day vs. Shield

This didn’t get the attention that it deserved because it’s a genuine dream match. Before the match, Woods says that while this is great fuel for the fan fiction writers, it’s also time for them to show that they’re the most dominant trio in WWE history. Kofi brings up the Raw roster invading three weeks after Smackdown did and not even doing it as well. They’re about to go Bob Barker on the Hounds of Justice (How did no one get that line in before?) and when Wrestlemania time comes up, the Shield will bite each other (true actually, at least before Dean got hurt).

They’re the true brotherhood around here and it’s time to prove it. And now, before the match, here’s another video of Smackdown invading Raw and vice versa, in case you didn’t get the point six minutes ago. The only new material here is New Day costing the Shield the Tag Team Titles. Big pop for Shield, as you had to expect. Seth and Dean have the half Raw half Shield shirts but Reigns is too cool to go that route.

Ambrose and Kofi start things off as the fans are split here, apparently not able to pick which wristlock they like best. Booker’s preview for the night: “There’s not gonna be a whole lot of entertainment.” This man gets paid to do this people. Rollins and Woods come in with Woods quickly realizing that he’s in way over his head. As the announcers discuss titles, Big E. comes in to face Rollins. Now you NXT fans should get where commentary should be going, but of course nothing is mentioned.

It’s off to Reigns instead and this isn’t quite the showdown that WWE thinks it is. Big E. breaks up a waistlock attempt and runs Reigns over with a shoulder, only to have an elbow do the same to him. A good looking Samoan drop gives Reigns two….and the fans are there with the SWEET because we’re that lucky. Everything breaks down and a triple clothesline takes Big E. and Kofi to the floor, leaving Woods to get stomped down in the corner. Rollins comes off the top with a right hands to the ribs as the Shield starts their rhythm.

Ambrose gives up the tag to Kofi though and things pick up in a hurry. The Boom Drop hits Ambrose but he kicks Kofi out of the air. It’s too early for Dirty Deeds though and the Unicorn Stampede is on. New Day does it again for good measure and the fans aren’t thrilled this time around. That’s enough for Rollins and Reigns and everything breaks down. Big E. spears Ambrose through the ropes, thankfully not coming that close to death. That’s only good for two and things settle down again with Ambrose’s shirt being ripped off. It’s an improvement, as Ambrose looks more normal in all black.

The chinlock goes on for a few moments before Dean breaks up a superplex attempt. Big E. can’t get one either and Dean missile dropkicks him down instead. The hot tag brings in Rollins, albeit with an unnecessary jump from Dean. Seth springboards in with the clothesline and starts in with his usual fast paced offense. The announcers are already getting really annoying with this Raw vs. Smackdown stuff and Graves being in the middle is all that’s holding it together.

Reigns comes in for a jumping clothesline to Woods and the Superman Punch knocks him even sillier. Big E. breaks up the spear but Rollins saves Dean from the Midnight Hour. The jumping knee into Dirty Deeds gets two on Kofi with Woods making a save of his own. A fired up Woods comes in so Rollins kicks him in the face to calm things down. Now it’s Big E.’s turn to break up the TripleBomb and there’s Trouble in Paradise to Rollins. Reigns is laid out on the floor so Woods puts Big E. on his shoulders so Kofi can jump over them for a splash onto Dean.

Woods drops Big E. onto him as well but there’s no cover. Instead Big E. picks up Ambrose and Rollins for a double Midnight Hour, leaving Reigns to spear Big E. onto the covers for a save. Both teams pull each other up for a cool visual and the fight is on again. Dirty Deeds plants Big E. on the floor and the spear cuts Kofi in half. Shield isn’t done though and it’s a super TripleBomb to completely finish Kofi at 21:32.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but once they turned it into the big fight feel, it became what it should have been. These teams are both great in different ways and while New Day has had more success as a trio, it’s hard to argue with them beating three former World Champions. Shield winning is the right choice, but at the same time it means that we have to hear about Raw being up 1-0 on Smackdown for far too long now.

Cole: “Raw is up 1-0!”

In the back, Stephanie McMahon: “Raw is up 1-0!” She gives the Raw women’s team a pep talk and it’s about as over the top as you would guess.

There’s a scoreboard to show Raw is in fact up 1-0.

Raw Women’s Team vs. Smackdown Women’s Team

Raw: Sasha Banks, Bayley, Alicia Fox, Asuka, Nia Jax

Smackdown: Carmella, Natalya, Becky Lynch, Naomi, Tamina

Lana is in Smackdown’s corner and Fox and Lynch are the captains. During the entrances (which are going to take their sweet time), Phillips reminds us that Raw is in fact up 1-0. Does WWE really think we have the attention spans of drunken squirrels? We also get to see the Raw women invading the Smackdown locker room so we can hear about UNDER SIEGE for the fifteenth time in the show’s first forty five minutes.

Fox and Lynch start things off with Fox actually getting the better of it off some forearms. Becky gets in a neck snap across the top though and drops a top rope legdrop for two. The threat of the Disarm-Her sends Fox to the ropes so Bayley tags herself in and grabs a rollup to get rid of Lynch at 2:02.

Natalya comes in next to stomp Bayley in the corner as Booker can’t figure out who is on which show. Tamina misses a splash in the corner and gets forearmed in the head before it’s off to Asuka to a big reaction. That’s just a preview though as a few kicks to the legs are enough before Asuka hands it back to Fox. Since it’s Fox and she’s not very good, it’s already back to Bayley, who gets beaten up in the corner. Carmella hits a superkick and Tamina’s Superfly Splash gets rid of Bayley at 5:27.

That’s what you get for cheering her when you’re not supposed to people. Nia comes in to face Tamina, and it’s not interesting a year earlier either. A shot knocks Naomi off the apron and Tamina does the same to Asuka before neither can hurt the other. Nia’s headbutt hurts both of them but Nia splashing her in the corner only hates Tamina. Lana gets on the apron for some reason so Nia knocks her off, allowing Tamina to superkick her to the floor. A dive from Naomi and another superkick set up the crossbody off the apron to get Nia counted out at 9:01.

Asuka comes in to unload with kicks to Carmella and the hip attack gets two. Carmella pulls her down by the hair and hits a quick Bronco Buster before pausing to mock Sasha’s dance. For reasons of general stupidity, Carmella slaps Asuka in the face and it’s a knee to the head, followed by a heck of a kick to get rid of Carmella at 12:59. Banks and Natalya come in and hit each other a few times until Natalya gets the better of it for two. Sasha gets sent face first into the middle buckle and the Sharpshooter makes her tap at 15:22, leaving Asuka vs. Natalya and Tamina in the Ultimate Warrior at Survivor Series 1988 mold.

Natalya gets in a few kicks and hands it off to Tamina for a slam. The Superfly Splash that wouldn’t have hit even if Asuka hadn’t moved misses when Asuka moves and it’s a cross armbreaker to get rid of Tamina at 17:32. Natalya can’t get the Sharpshooter as Asuka pulls her into a kneebar, followed by a kick to the face. The Asuka Lock finishes Natalya at 18:27.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t great to start but the ending was exactly the right call with Asuka getting the star treatment at the end. The rest of the match wasn’t all that great as the focus was on Tamina (who still isn’t interesting, mainly because Nia is better at every single thing Tamina is around to do) or Alicia being wacky, making it an exercise in waiting around on Asuka. To their credit though, they got that part right and that’s what mattered most.

Here’s what coming on WWE Network. Don’t worry though, because they’ll air almost nothing but NXT, 205 Live and whatever tournament they have going on at the moment.

Stephanie (erg) brags to Daniel Bryan about Raw being up 2-0. She accuses Bryan of getting John Cena on the Smackdown men’s team by practically being family. Bryan: “Didn’t you put your husband on the Raw team?” It turns into a discussion of Wrestlemania XXX as this goes on way too long as we AGAIN recap the invasions. Sweet goodness WE WATCH THE TV SHOWS AND DON’T NEED TO HEAR THIS STUFF OVER AND OVER AGAIN! I haven’t watched the TV shows since last year and I can tell you what happens week by week just because of all these recaps.

Baron Corbin vs. The Miz

Smackdown vs. Raw and US Champion vs. Intercontinental Champion, though it’s non-title, like every match tonight. Miz has Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel with him and Corbin has been talking trash about Maryse and Miz’s unborn child. The threat of an early clothesline sends Miz bailing to the floor and it’s time for some consultation. A Dallas distraction lets Miz hit a baseball slide, followed by a clothesline to put Corbin right back on the floor. Corbin kicks him off the apron though as they’re going back and forth pretty fast so far.

The fans try to start some dueling chants but the LET’S GO MIZ chants are pretty clearly louder. Corbin misses a running crotch attack to the back but easily avoids a baseball slide. With Miz in trouble, Dallas hits Corbin in the knee to give Miz his first actual advantage. The Figure Four is easily blocked but a chop block cuts Corbin down again. Now the Figure Four goes on but that’s broken up in short order, allowing Corbin to hit Deep Six on one leg.

Dallas is right there again with a shot to the knee though and Miz adds a big boot. Corbin’s knee is fine enough to slide underneath the ropes and beat up the Miztourage but the End of Days is countered into a DDT for two. Some rather weak looking YES Kicks don’t have much effect so Miz hits the running corner dropkicks. Corbin shrugs them off though and End of Days is good for the pin at 9:26.

Rating: D+. Commentary really hurt this one as the put on Raw vs. Smackdown stuff continues. The leg work was fine but when Corbin is fine enough to do all of his usual stuff and then hit his finisher to win, it doesn’t mean that much. You had to give Smackdown something in this whole thing and given how bad the midcard titles are presented in the first place, this was the least painful loss for a champion.

Post match Corbin says he just shut everyone’s mouth.

Paul Heyman says everything about tonight is phenomenal, including AJ Styles. Then the bell will ring and the conqueror is going to rip AJ Styles apart.

Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

Before the match, the Usos mock the Bar’s catchphrase and says they’ll be bartenders tonight. Or maybe they’re pole vaulters. Sheamus drives Jimmy into the corner to start and Jimmy isn’t sure what to do here. Instead it’s off to Jey who does the same to Sheamus, though he’s smart enough to stomp away and take over. As the announcers discuss Corey’s lack of success (as Booker hadn’t heard about it), Cesaro comes in and gets hiptossed down.

A quick double team puts Jimmy down though and it’s off to a headlock, because a chinlock isn’t sophisticated enough. Jimmy knocks Sheamus to the floor but a dive gets cut off by a Cesaro uppercut. Back in and Cesaro puts on a Crossface without the arm trap as Booker wants the Bar to be called the A-Team. Graves: “Why would you do that? They’re called the Bar Booker.” Sheamus drops a knee and puts on a chinlock with Cesaro running in to kick Jey off the apron.

The pop up uppercut gets two but Sheamus takes too long setting up the ten forearms to the chest. Booker: “Think about the brand!” Jimmy gets in a Whisper in the Wind and that’s enough for the hot tag to pick up the pace. He also picks up Cesaro with a backdrop into the corner for two, leaving Sheamus to argue with the referee. Jey gets in a superkick but Sheamus adds a forearm to the back, allowing Cesaro to Swing Jimmy into the Sharpshooter. The longest crawl to a rope I can remember gets Jey out of trouble, assuming you bought the Sharpshooter as a potential finish either (you shouldn’t have).

The spike White Noise is broken up and Sheamus is sent into the post. He’s fine enough to hold Jey up for White Noise with Cesaro adding a springboard spike. Jimmy makes a great looking last second save so Cesaro throws him out and loads up Jey in a powerbomb. Sheamus goes up top but gets punched in the face, allowing Jimmy to Samoan drop him down with Cesaro adding the powerbomb. Cesaro dives in the way of a double superkick, leaving Sheamus to take the same thing. Jimmy does the eternally cool tag while diving over the top to take out Cesaro. The Superfly Splash finishes Sheamus at 15:56.

Rating: B-. Yeah of course this was good with two very talented teams. Granted a year later the Usos haven’t had a meaningful match in forever and the Bar are now the Smackdown Tag Team Champions, but at least this was entertaining. If nothing else though, this is a great showcase of what happens when you just let people go and have a fun match, which is always going to help things out.

Jason Jordan, who was recently (and thankfully) replaced on the Raw team by HHH, wants to see HHH get eliminated before Team Raw wins.

We recap Charlotte winning the Smackdown Women’s Title on Tuesday to take Natalya’s spot tonight. If nothing else it was awesome to see Ric Flair come out after his health scares.

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

Non-….you get the idea. Charlotte knocks her outside early on and is polite enough to hold the ropes open to invite Bliss back in. Booker of course talks about baseball. Back in and Bliss hides in the ropes before slapping her in the face. That earns Bliss a hard right hand so they head to the apron with Bliss snapping the arm to the floor. A dropkick into the steps has Charlotte in more trouble and it’s off to an abdominal stretch, though Charlotte has to kneel because Bliss isn’t that tall.

Some kicks to the ribs keep Charlotte in trouble and she gets sent face first into the middle buckle to make things even worse. Bliss tries to go aerial but a tornado DDT is countered into a t-bone suplex into the corner (with Bliss bouncing around as only she can). Charlotte gets crotched on top but rolls away before Twisted Bliss. That’s even worse for her though as she gets caught with middle rope double knees to the back (I still don’t get how that doesn’t cause a severe injury.).

Code Red gives Bliss two and she hammers away with even more fire than she usually shows. A guillotine choke has Charlotte in trouble (it worked for Bayley against Nia Jax) but a sitout powerbomb (looked great) breaks that up. The fans are split (as they should be) and Bliss breaks up the Figure Eight with a right hand that has the referee checking on Charlotte.

Natural Selection gets two but the moonsault misses (as always). Bliss grabs her DDT for two of her own so she chokes and screams a lot. Amazingly enough, Charlotte can pretty easily overpower Bliss and hits a spear to cut her in half. Back up and more kicks to the ribs have Charlotte in trouble but Twisted Bliss hits raised knees. A big boot sets up the Figure Eight to make Bliss tap at 15:46 and put Smackdown up 3-2.

Rating: B. Heck of a match here with Bliss looking like she could more than hang with someone on Charlotte’s level. You don’t see someone go move for move with Charlotte like this and it’s a great sign for Bliss’ future. The ribs story was perfectly fine, even if it meant that another champion had to lose. You know, because of bragging rights.

Post match, Charlotte nods in approval.

We recap AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar in another champion vs. champion match. Lesnar is the monster and AJ is the new underdog champion (sounds oxymoronish), thankfully saving us from Lesnar vs. Jinder Mahal.

Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles

Heyman handles Lesnar’s introductions, saying he’s fighting (Heyman: “Fighting. You hear that Mr. Performer?”) and the fans are split to start. Brock goes straight to the shoulders in the corner and throws AJ across the ring a few times. Forearms to the back keep AJ in trouble as the dominance is on early. One heck of an overhead belly to belly has Styles in more trouble and there’s the first German suplex. Lesnar sends him outside for a toss into the barricade as Cole is almost giddy.

Back in and another German suplex has AJ rocked but he tries to get up anyway. With Heyman cradling the Universal Title like a newborn, Brock hits a running knee in the corner. Lesnar wants him to fight and then clotheslines AJ right back down. Some right hands have little effect for Styles as Brock puts him down again. The F5 doesn’t work and Lesnar’s second running knee hits the buckle.

A DDT actually puts Lesnar down and it’s time to cheer for AJ as he kicks at the leg. Lesnar throws him off a tornado DDT attempt and they’re both down. AJ tries a springboard but gets caught in a German suplex that flips him over his head. Well of course it does. This time AJ ducks the big right hand and Lesnar falls to the floor, setting up the slingshot forearm. Brock goes knee first into the steps and there’s another forearm off said steps.

Rating: A-. Oh yeah this worked. I was getting into these near falls all over again as they were nailing the Rocky story. Lesnar knows how to play the monster but AJ is even better at being the fighting from underneath high flier. This was great stuff and I’d love to see it again, even if a year later they’re somehow right where they were here. Anyway, great performance from both guys as Lesnar shows he can still do it.

We recap the Raw vs. Smackdown men’s match. Allow me:

UNDER SIEGE

Invasion

Invasion

Stephanie is really, really annoying

Roster changes because they knew the original lineups were awful

Invasion

Got all that?

Raw Men’s Team vs. Smackdown Men’s Team

Kurt Angle, Braun Strowman, Finn Balor, Samoa Joe, HHH

Shane McMahon, Randy Orton, Bobby Roode, Shinsuke Nakamura, John Cena

What are the odds that the whole competition comes down to this? Shane jumps at Strowman to start because Shane is the most awesome person ever. That’s shrugged off so we’ll try Joe vs. Orton instead. Joe headlocks him into the corner without much effort so let’s go with Nakamura vs. Balor instead. That certainly gets the fans into it, though Cole ruins it a bit by calling him Shin. The feeling out process begins as the NXT chants start up.

Nakamura takes him to the ropes for the swinging arms, only to be reversed into a TOO SWEET to the head. HHH comes in for a kind of weird showdown and takes Nakamura into the corner for the right hands. Nakamura gets in the first kick to the chest but the facebuster sends him into the corner for the tag to Roode. This one isn’t so much weird as much as it is….nothing. Since Roode’s pose takes forever, HHH punches him in the face. Fair enough actually.

The spinebuster takes Roode down again but Roode counters the Pedigree and hits a spinebuster of his own. That means we get the GLORIOUS pose but the Glorious DDT is broken up. Instead HHH drives him into the corner for the tag off to Angle for the rolling German suplexes.

A double clothesline puts them both down so the Raw guys switch places on the apron. It’s off to Nakamura for the running knees so Joe comes in to make the save. Everything breaks down and Nakamura hits Kinshasa on HHH, only to run into the now legal Strowman. The middle rope knee staggers the monster but the running powerslam gets rid of Nakamura at 11:31.

Roode comes in and kicks at Strowman’s legs, followed by the Blockbuster. That’s not even good for one so Roode tries it again, earning himself another running powerslam for the pin at 12:22. For some reason Joe and Strowman get in an argument, as do HHH and Angle. Smackdown is smart enough to let them fight until Orton and Shane come in like idiots. Orton powerslams Joe and Cena is all fired up, only to have Strowman come in for a heck of a 2-1 showdown. The AA and RKO are both broken up and Strowman knocks them both to the floor.

Orton and Cena get together and the rest of Team Smackdown (including the eliminated members) get together to suplex Strowman through a table. Naturally Shane gets to talk the trash but Joe breaks up an elbow to the floor with a belly to belly superplex. Cena comes in to hammer on Joe but gets booted in the face. The Rock Bottom out of the corner looks to set up the Coup de Grace, only to have Joe and Balor get in an argument. An AA to Joe, an AA to Balor and another to Joe is good for an elimination at 18:05.

Angle comes in for the showdown with some history behind it and Cena gets taken down without much effort. Back up and Cena elbows him in the face, followed by initiating the finishing sequence. The Shuffle is reversed into the ankle lock but Cena slips out without much damage. The Angle Slam does a little more damage, to the point where Shane has to make a save. Balor drops the Coup de Grace and another Slam gets rid of Cena at 21:45.

We’re down to Orton/Shane vs. Balor/HHH/Angle/Strowman so Orton comes in, only to get forearmed by Balor. A trip to the floor lets Balor shotgun dropkick Shane into the barricade. Back in and the Coup de Grace misses again, setting up an RKO to get rid of Balor at 23:46. HHH is right there to jump Orton from behind but the backbreaker gets him out of trouble.

Cue Sami and Owens to beat Shane up but he fights them off with a chair, because OF COURSE HE CAN DO THAT. An RKO drops Owens….and Strowman is back up to come in again. The running powerslam is good for the elimination at 26:32 and Shane is worried, mainly because he’s alone against HHH, Strowman and Angle. Shane stands around forever before going in to face Strowman until HHH tags himself in. Angle tags himself in as well and gets taken down by a Russian legsweep.

Rating: D+. Yeah this still didn’t work a year later either. The first third is spent on showdowns that don’t mean anything and the rest is getting rid of the people who don’t matter so we can get down to the big stuff with Shane, HHH and Angle. You know, the older guys. The wrestling wasn’t the worst but it was long, didn’t feel important and came off more as a way to get to the ending instead of something worth seeing along the way.

Post match HHH is all smiley as Strowman stares him down. Strowman grabs him by the throat and says never do this again so HHH tries a Pedigree but gets powerslammed twice to end the show. This of course lead nowhere.

Overall Rating: B-. Much like last year, the show just felt long and brought down the good things they had going on. Now that being said, the good matches on the show were more than good enough to make up for the bad and the show is definitely worth seeing. AJ vs. Brock is more than good and the opener isn’t far behind. In other words, this Survivor Series is great if you take out the Survivor Series matches.

If nothing else, they’ve made me dislike Survivor Series, which used to be my favorite pay per view. This Raw vs. Smackdown story was pure annoyance with the announcers all suddenly being cheerleaders about a story that would disappear in a few days. It feels so manufactured and, because it’s WWE, they beat you over the head with it so hard that you’re waiting on the whole thing to finally end so you don’t have to hear about it anymore. Thanks for sucking the fun out of one of my favorite shows guys. It only took thirty years.

Ratings Comparison

Elias vs. Matt Hardy

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore

Original: D

Redo: D+

Kevin Owens/Sami Zayn vs. Breezango

Original: D+

Redo: D+

New Day vs. Shield

Original: B

Redo: B+

Team Raw Women vs. Team Smackdown Women

Original: D

Redo: C-

The Miz vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Usos vs. Cesaro/Sheamus

Original: B

Redo: B-

Charlotte vs. Alexa Bliss

Original: B+

Redo: B

AJ Styles vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Team Raw Men vs. Team Smackdown Men

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

Redo: B

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/19/survivor-series-2017-never-mind-the-talent-here-are-the-old-guys/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: August 1, 2008
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

Things have gotten more interesting around here as Vickie Guerrero seems to be rather vengeful after Edge cheated on her. As a result, Edge is now set for a Hell In A Cell match against the Undertaker at Summerslam, which cannot end well for him. Other than that, HHH is set to defend the World Title against the Great Khali. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge apologizing to Vickie Guerrero but getting sent to the Cell anyway.

Opening sequence.

Here is Jeff Hardy to watch the first match as we’re told that he is facing Edge at Saturday Night’s Main Event. This is noteworthy as other than the Jenny McCarthy stuff, the show has not been mentioned in the slightest.

MVP vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

MVP comes out first and is announced as “coming to the ring to face Jimmy Wang Yang”, which isn’t something you often hear. Before the match, MVP mocks Hardy for never being WWE Champion because of his risky behavior. MVP wastes no time in knocking Yang down and then faceplants him without much trouble. The double underhook crank goes on, allowing MVP to yell at Hardy a bit more. Yang fights up and strikes away, including a running spinwheel kick in the corner. MVP is right back with a gutbuster though and the Drive By finishes.

Post match Hardy gets in the ring and tells MVP to never mention his family or dog again. The ensuing brawl goes to Hardy.

Chavo Guerrero isn’t sure who the surprise guest on the Cutting Edge is tonight but he and Vickie Guerrero run into Alicia Fox. JR: “What is the wedding planner still doing here?”

Mr. Kennedy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. The bell rings and Kennedy gets in another name shout, as is his custom. Benjamin takes him down but gets chased to the floor for a bit of a surprised reaction. Back in and Kennedy starts in on the arm but Benjamin drives him into the corner to break that up. Kennedy gets in a knee to put Benjamin down and goes back to the arm. The armbar keeps Benjamin down before Kennedy kicks him in the face. Back up and Kennedy misses a charge into the post though and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin working on the arm for a change as they’re not exactly going at a high gear so far. A shoulderbreaker gives Benjamin two and the ensuing arm stomping has the fans a bit restless. Benjamin wraps his legs around the arm (at least he’s mixing it up) before switching to a cross armbreaker.

The cranking continues until Kennedy finally reverses into something close to a Sharpshooter, sending Benjamin over to the rope. Kennedy fights back but Benjamin jumps to the top for a spinning crossbody for two in one of those insane athletic displays of his. Kennedy can’t quite get a backslide but he can kick Benjamin in the face and hit the Mic Check for the pin.

Rating: C-. I don’t know what’s going on with WWE’s matches this week but they have felt incredibly lazy and slow paced. It’s been a lot of laying around in holds without much action in between. That doesn’t feel like what WWE usually does but it’s really not working. The talent is there, but it doesn’t matter if they aren’t going to use it.

Post match Benjamin says he won’t make excuses….but he has bronchitis.

Chavo Guerrero comes in to see Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins, who haven’t seen Edge. Their discussion of wrestling figures continues.

The Brian Kendrick vs. Stevie Richards

Ezekiel is here with Kendrick. Before the match, Kendrick talks about how smart he is and goes over his history in WWE, which was all a ruse to get here. If you have any problem with that, take it up with Ezekiel. Kendrick takes him down to start and cranks on the neck with something like a camel clutch dragon sleeper. Since that can’t last long, Kendrick hits a middle rope dropkick to the back for two, setting up a Boston crab.

With that broken up, Kendrick settles for kicking Richards back down and then standing on his head. Er, Richards’ head if that isn’t clear. Richards gets fired up and fights back, hitting his own kick for two. A nice Sky High gets two on Kendrick and Richards sends him outside, where Ezekiel cuts off the crash. Back in and a quick shot lets Kendrick hit the Kendrick for the win.

Rating: C. Richards’ comeback was nice here but it’s nice to see Kendrick getting to keep building himself up. He’s different enough kind of star and I’ve been digging the start of his run around here. Richards is a good choice to put someone over and make them look good, thankfully which didn’t take long to make happen.

Post match Ezekiel puts Richards in a torture rack for good measure.

Great Khali vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy realizes this isn’t going to be easy but shoves Khali anyway. Some right hands and a clothesline stagger Khali a bit but he takes Hardy down with a clothesline of his own. Hardy get knocked into the corner and slowly beaten down, as you might have seen coming. A hard slam puts Hardy down again so Khali does it a second time.

The big elbows in the corner rock Hardy again and Khali knocks him outside to cut off a comeback attempt. We take a break and come back with Khali putting on a nerve hold to keep Hardy in trouble. Hardy fights up again and manages a Whisper in the Wind for the big knockdown. The Swanton connects but Hardy has to take out an invading MVP, allowing Khali to grab the vice for the win.

Rating: C. This was about all you could expect from such a match, as Khali going ten minutes is only going to go so well. Khali’s reputation for being terrible isn’t exactly fair, as he is more than capable of having a passable match. That’s what we got here, as Hardy was fighting from underneath the whole way with a few nice hope spots. It wasn’t terrible by any means, which is getting close to Khali’s peak.

We get another R-Truth video, this time talking about how poor decisions landed him in prison. Someone told him everything to do and when to do it but then he became a free man. Now he’s determined to never let that happen again because he is in control. These have been very good so far and make R-Truth seem rather interesting.

Maria vs. Victoria

Victoria easily takes her down to start and grabs a front facelock. Back up and Victoria mocks the Kiss Cam, setting up the spinning fireman’s carry side slam for two. A headscissors gets Maria out of trouble but Victoria plants her right back down for two. We hit the seated full nelson for a bit before Maria is back up with a sunset flip for two of her own. Maria kicks her way out of the corner and hits a middle rope clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C-. Maria feels like the Smackdown version of Kelly Kelly, as WWE seems like they want to push her based on her looks and charisma. That makes sense, but the in-ring stuff just isn’t quite there. Maybe it could change for her as she is still mostly new in the ring, but it’s easy to see why she’ll get chance after chance. The fact that the fans like her a lot is only going to make it easier too.

Edge is in a confined space with Alicia Fox, apparently having invited her. He got her the ticket to the show because she’ll want to see his special guest.

Video on HHH.

Summerslam rundown.

Big Show vs. Domino

Domino tries a waistlock to start and is quickly knocked outside. Back in and some chops set up the chokeslam to finish Domino quick.

Post match Umaga comes out for the staredown with Show.

Chavo Guerrero and Vickie Guerrero don’t know who the special guest on the Cutting Edge is going to be. Didn’t we already establish that?

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table, a ladder and a chair. He’s rather worried as he sits down to talk about his recent search for inner peace. His marriage is going through a rough patch, but in just over two weeks, he’ll be locked in a Cell with the Undertaker.

We pause for the UNDERTAKER chant before Edge talks about all the footage he’s seen of the destruction Undertaker can cause. That is why he has surrounded himself with tables, ladders and chairs, because he knows them so well and they helped him vanquish Undertaker in the first place. He has found the one person who can help him against the Undertaker the most: MICK FOLEY!

This seems to take Foley by surprise but he eventually gets in the ring. Edge understands that they have history but he is a changed man. What he wants is Foley to remember what he used to be, so we get a video on 1998, including a bunch of stuff that has nothing to do with Foley.

Eventually we get to the Cell match with Foley and Undertaker, which has Foley smiling a bit. Edge knows Foley is still feeling that match but he walked away on his own. Since then, Edge has seen Foley try and fail to walk properly. Now Foley has the chance to help Edge get back at the Undertaker. Foley talks about how much he would love to help Edge, but the one thing he has going for him is his word.

For years, Foley has praised Edge both on the microphone and on the written page. Unless fans have a really long memory, they think Edge sucks. They have been looking at an Edge who takes shortcuts and plays the numbers game while relying on his wife. Foley cannot help Edge, because only Edge can help himself. He needs to find the Edge who made Foley believe in him.

Where is the Edge who made the letters TLC mean something? Just two years ago, they had the greatest hardcore match in Wrestlemania history. If Edge can find that Edge, Foley and JR can call the greatest match WWE has ever seen. But if it’s the Edge we’ve been seeing, the one who wears a white tuxedo and uses a loofah, Undertaker will massacre him. Edge understands and then decks Foley with the microphone but Foley fights back.

They go outside with Foley finding a chair but Edge kicks it back into his face. The spear sends Foley head first into the steps, allowing Edge to load up the table back inside. A quick Mandible Claw is broken up by a low blow and Edge puts him on the table. The big chair shots off the ladder through the table leaves Foley broken to end the show.

They took their sweet time to get there, but as usual, Foley can bring the goods when you ask him to get serious and emotional. They had to do this kind of a change for Edge, because Foley was right when he said we hadn’t seen the really good one for a long time. It’s the kind of beatdown you need, though I do continue to wonder why anyone would want Foley’s advice on a Cell match when he never actually won any of them.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was almost all about Edge, with only MVP/Jeff Hardy being something noteworthy otherwise. They’re betting heavily on that one match and I’m not sure it’s enough for two hours, especially with Undertaker not being around. Throw in HHH not being here other than for a staredown last week and Edge is carrying this show on his back. He can make that work if everything goes right, but there isn’t enough going on to make this show good. The Edge stuff was good, but they need something else and HHH is going to have to be back to make that work.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: July 25, 2008
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

We are done with the Great American Bash and HHH is still the World Champion, having beaten Edge, who is still having all kinds of issues with his new bride, Vickie Guerrero. That could go in a few different ways but odds are it is going to be the big focal point for the time being. Other than that, HHH Is going to need a new challenger for Summerslam so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge marrying and then cheating n Vickie Guerrero.

Opening sequence.

Here is MVP with the VIP Lounge to get things going. After bragging about his hair, MVP lists off his various nicknames before bringing out his controversial guest: Jeff Hardy. MVP gets right to the point by announcing that Hardy will be in a battle royal for the shot at HHH at Summerslam. Naturally MVP is the favorite to win the match but Hardy brings up that MVP hasn’t won a match in….well a long time actually.

MVP talks about how Hardy has a lot going on right now, like being on the cover of WWE Magazine. Hardy likes to take big risks, but some of them have resulted in some big failures. One of those failures is talked about in the Magazine, with Hardy saying it resulted in a 60 day suspension (but not actually saying what it was). MVP brings up Hardy losing the Intercontinental Title and his home in a fire, with Hardy not being sure why we’re talking about this.

MVP thinks Hardy’s reckless behavior might have resulted in the death of his dog and that is making him feel guilty (geez). The reality is that Hardy is ruining his career with his behavior and because of that, he will never be WWE Champion. MVP doesn’t buy that Hardy will never be suspended again, with Hardy saying he’ll be released instead.

That doesn’t work for MVP, who says Hardy needs to start acting like a professional and a grown man. Hardy says he’s all about second changes, which is something MVP should know about. MVP tells him to settle down and gets shoved to the floor. This was a really weird segment and felt more like a public punishment/embarrassment for Hardy than anything else.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Before the match, Benjamin says he liberated the US Title from Matt Hardy and there ain’t no stopping him now. Benjamin throws him down to start and drops some knees as Foley talks about Benjamin yelling at him backstage. Yang gets in an enziguri into a headscissors as Foley compares Yang’s speed to Cool Papa Bell (look him up). Not that it matters as Benjamin hits Paydirt for the fast pin.

The Edgeheads come in to see Edge, who is proud of them for winning the Tag Team Titles. Edge wants to apologize but they say it was his business. They have a match to get ready for and leave rather quickly. Edge looks at his wedding ring.

Festus vs. Curt Hawkins

Jesse and Zack Ryder are here too. Festus strikes away to start but misses a charge in the corner. Back up and Festus knocks him to the floor, where Jesse cuts off Ryder from ringing the bell. They head back inside, where Festus grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the fast pin.

Post match the bell rings and Jesse and Festus get beaten down.

Jenny McCarthy and her celebrity friends don’t like autism.

Edge corners Alicia Fox in the back and says she needs to blend in more. Bam Neely is shown listening as Edge says they’ll talk about this at the hotel. Saying it in front of a camera might not have been the best idea.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Stevie Richards

Kozlov takes him into the corner to start but Richards hits a quick clothesline for two. A belly to belly overhead suplex sets up a front facelock suplex as Richards is in trouble. Richards has to fight out of a Fujiwara armbar and sidesteps a charge to put Kozlov on the floor. Back in and a dropkick gives Richards one but a tornado DDT is blocked. The headbutt to the chest gives Kozlov the pin.

We get the same video on Edge/Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox that opened the show.

Battle Royal

Great Khali, MVP, Big Show, Jeff Hardy, Mr. Kennedy, Umaga

For the World Title shot at HHH at Summerslam. MVP bails to the floor to start, leaving Hardy and Kennedy to go after Khali in the corner. That gets them nowhere as Khali hits a double clothesline, followed by a big chop to MVP. Show hits a side slam on Umaga and gets the required showdown with Khali. Umaga is back up to superkick both of them down and we take a break.

Back with no one having been eliminated and Hardy hitting the Whisper In The Wind on Umaga. Everyone pairs off again and Hardy tosses out MVP for the first elimination. Show and Umaga slug it out with Show shouldering him down and then throwing Umaga out. Kennedy hammers on Show and is thrown out for his efforts.

That leaves us with Hardy, Umaga and Khali, with Khali chopping Show down. Show blocks the tree slam and manages a chokeslam, only to get headscissored out by Hardy. A Swanton hits Khali but just seems to get him back to his feet. Hardy kicks him low to escape the vice but Khali hits a chop and gets the win.

Rating: C. They kept this moving quickly enough and it for a better battle royal. You can only get so far with six competitors in the first place but the good thing is almost anyone could have won. I’ll take that over having a bunch of people with no chance in there and this worked well enough. Khali is certainly a dragon for HHH to slay and it should make for a….something main event.

Post match HHH comes out for the staredown.

We see a not so nice place with someone talking about growing up in a bad neighborhood, which is why he got caught in a life of crime. It taught him what he needed to know though and that is the truth, because R-Truth is coming to Smackdown.

Michelle McCool vs. Maryse

Non-title. McCool takes her down by the hair to start before they trade rams into the buckle. A dropkick drops Maryse (with a kick) but she sends McCool outside as commentary talks about Jennie Finch (popular softball player of her day). Back in and Maryse hammers away, only to get rolled into the heel hook to give McCool the fast win.

Raw Rebound.

Chavo Guerrero wheels Vickie Guerrero into the arena, where Bam Neely greets them.

Next week: Maria.

Edge tells Bam Neely that he needs to talk to Vickie Guerrero, in the arena.

Brian Kendrick vs. Shannon Moore

Before the match, Kendrick tells us how lucky we are to get to see him in person, because he’s that good. He also introduces us to his rather large bodyguard named Ezekiel, who will deal with anyone who tries to touch greatness. Kendrick hammers away in the corner to start but misses a charge, allowing Moore to hit a quick legdrop. Ezekiel offers a distraction though and Kendrick gets in a shoulder on the apron. Kendrick grabs Sliced Bread #2, which is dubbed the Kendrick, for the fast pin.

Bam Neely tells Vickie Guerrero that Edge wants to see her in the arena…but he can’t remember who is supposed to do the apologizing. Vickie looks….I’m not sure really.

Ben Stiller doesn’t like autism.

Here is Edge for his big meeting with Vickie Guerrero. Edge gets right to the point and says he wants to apologize to her in public, face to face, so he would like her to come out here. It takes a pretty long time but Vickie, with Chavo Guerrero and Bam Neely (in the busiest show of his life), finally comes out. Edge apologizes, saying that the video didn’t show how many times he tried to say no to Alicia Fox.

She was so aggressive and wouldn’t take no for an answer. Edge had to stay to hammer out the wedding plans because he knew how important it was to both of them. Nothing means more to him that Vickie’s happiness. Vickie seems touched and says she understands so we get a big hug, with Edge looking relieved. They’re not done though, as Vickie says she was a woman scorned.

While they’re better now, she did something when she was mad at him: she reinstated the Undertaker. Panic ensues but Edge says that’s good business. Undertaker and HHH can fight each other and he can pick the bones and get his title back. It’s not that simple though, as Vickie has already made a match between Undertaker and Edge at Summerslam….and it’s inside Hell In A Cell. Edge knows he’s in big trouble to end the show. This was actually a pretty awesome segment as Vickie strung him along for the whole time, knowing the bombshell she had waiting for him.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t your normal show, with only one match breaking three minutes in two hours. At the same time, they set up a few major matches for Summerslam, which is off to a hot start. The opening and closing segments both worked well, with the battle royal being fine enough. This wasn’t a show that focused on the wrestling, which is ok every so often as it can give you some important results. That’s what they did here and it made for a good show.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: May 17, 2010
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
Guest Host: Buzz Aldrin

This is a requested show, mainly because it features quite the Canadian cast of stars in Toronto. That should be enough to make things interesting, but we’re also in the Bret Hart Era, as he showed up again back in January and just kind of stayed. We could be in for a fun time, as I have almost no memory of this time. Let’s get to it.

As a bonus, this show is commercial free.

Opening sequence. Dang I miss Nickelback. Yeah I said it.

Here is Bret Hart to get things going and yeah the fans seem to like him (the Blue Jays jersey probably helps). Last week Hart heard Miz challenge him to a US Title match here in Toronto and he doesn’t take challenges lightly. He called headquarters and said book the match but now he’s had a week to think about it. There are so many old wrestlers who keep hanging around long past their time and he doesn’t want to be one, so the match is off.

Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt and he wants to know why Hart came back. Hart can’t fool him because all Jericho sees is a pathetic has been. Jericho doesn’t think Hart cares about closure and he’s only back here because he’s a big phony. Hart deserved to get screwed in Montreal, but Hart asks Jericho when he last looked in a mirror. What Hart remembers is Jericho learning in the Hart Dungeon but he was more often up getting a drink instead of training.

Jericho is the one who needs to take a good look at himself, but Jericho says he did that earlier and saw a man better than Hart ever was. Jericho thinks Hart is out here to hear the fans cheer for him one more time, but the reality is Hart doesn’t matter. To all of Hart’s new fans…..pause for a pro-Bret chant…..the reality is the Hart name means nothing anymore. Stu Hart would be ashamed of his son.

Jericho goes to leave, but Hart says tell Miz to get his boots on because he has a match tonight. That makes Jericho chuckle because he thinks Hart will try to get himself disqualified, so the match should be No DQ. Works for Hart, who also promises that the Hart Dynasty is going to beat Jericho and Miz on Sunday at Over The Limit. This felt like a way to have Jericho and Hart together in the ring and….yeah that works.

Great Khali hates rental cars. Hornswoggle is in a Hummer. It’s a WWEshop ad.

Here is Edge for a chat before his name. He talks about the people Randy Orton has been RKOing in recent weeks but gets cut off by Orton’s handpicked opponent for later tonight (with Edge getting to pick Orton’s later).

Edge vs. Christian

They take their time to start with a lockup going nowhere, leaving Edge looking rather confused. Christian takes him down again and we have another standoff. Edge slaps him in the face and bails to the floor to start the chase. Back in and Edge hammers away to take over, only to have Christian hit him in the face a few times. Christian sends him outside though and hits a slingshot neck snap, setting up the springboard dive to the floor.

Christian’s charge hits the barricade though and he barely beats the count back in. Back in and Edge grabs the armbar before knocking Christian down to cut off the comeback attempt. The armbar goes on again, only to have Edge switch to a simple pull on the arm. Christian fights up but can’t hit the pendulum kick in the corner. Edge catches him on top but a superplex attempt is countered into a tornado DDT for two.

The Killswitch is countered so Christian hits him in the face instead. Christian’s top rope splash misses and Edge sends him hard into the corner. The spear misses for Edge though and Christian hits the pendulum kick. The Killswitch still doesn’t work though as Christian’s arm gives out, with Edge sending it hard into the post. Now the spear can give Edge the pin.

Rating: B. Yeah of course these two are going to be able to have a good match with each other in their sleep. It helps when they’ve known each other for the better part of ever and they had the time to put together something solid. This felt like a showdown and they beat each other up with Edge picking the arm apart and finishing him off.

Post match Randy Orton pops up on screen to say he isn’t sure why Christian was out there, because that wasn’t Edge’s opponent. Here’s Orton’s pick to face Edge.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge immediately bails to the apron and yeah he’ll just take the countout.

Post match Christian throws Edge in and there’s the chokeslam.

Maryse is not happy with Trish Stratus being on the cover of a magazine because Trish is no celebrity. She also mocks Divas Champion Eve Torres, who shows up to pour powder over Maryse. The brawl is on with Maryse being left laying.

Buzz Aldrin and his wife are here when Vickie Guerrero comes in to introduce herself. There’s just one problem: the Aldrins are in her office. Aldrin talks about walking on the moon and compares it to Vickie walking out as GM of Raw. Actually her replacement will be here next week! Aldrin tries to show her some app on his phone but Vickie doesn’t care. That’s fine with him, as he has the Bella Twins come in and get rid of her. My goodness I forgot how worthless this whole concept really was.

We look at Batista attacking Mark Henry with a chair last week and putting him in something like the Rings of Saturn.

Mark Henry vs. Batista

Henry’s shoulder is taped up and Batista jumps him from behind with a 2×4. The shoulder is sent into the post and Batista steps onto Henry to get in the ring. Batista demands and receives a spotlight. Posing ensues and no match.

We look at the history between Sheamus and John Cena.

Ted DiBiase vs. Yoshi Tatsu

DiBiase brings out VIRGIL as his bodyguard as he is getting to throw his money around. Tatsu starts fast with an armdrag into a dropkick for two but gets driven into the corner. A big gutbuster takes Tatsu down though and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Tatsu kicks him in the face, then does it to the chest for two. Back up and Tatsu misses another shot and walks into Dream Street for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can consider a lot of factors about why DiBiase’s time in WWE didn’t go well, but at the end of the day, he just wasn’t that interesting. He has average size, a generic look and nothing special in the ring. Other than his father, what was there that made him stand out in any way?

Post match DiBiase calls out R-Truth (who turned down the chance to be DiBiase’s “Virgil”) and says the person who has no problem with being the new Virgil is the original Virgil. DiBiase says he if can’t buy it, he’ll beat it, including R-Truth at Over The Limit.

Chris Jericho gives Miz a pep talk and Miz is NOT answering questions. Instead, Miz talks about how you don’t see a national hero coming back again but Miz is ready to beat him. Miz walks into the arena and promises to embarrass both Bret Hart and the Hart Family name. He promises to make Hart scream and tap out to the Sharpshooter, just to make it personal.

US Title: Miz vs. Bret Hart

Hart is challenging and this is No DQ/No Countout. Miz immediately bails out to the floor and says he doesn’t trust Hart, who would bring in the Hart Dynasty. Cue Vladimir Kozlov and William Regal, who have been paid to deal with them. Indeed cue the Hart Dynasty to brawl with them to the back so cue Chris Jericho, with Natalya coming in to even things up a bit. A slap drops Jericho but he’s back up to deck Hart. David Hart-Smith is back in to help make the save but Miz loads up a Sharpshooter. Tyson Kidd runs in to break that up and it’s a Hart Attack into the Sharpshooter to make Hart champion.

Rating: C. Obviously this was more of an angle than a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Hart gets one more title win, even a token one, and it was a nice feeling in his home country. It also furthers the Dynasty vs. Jericho/Miz so it’s not like anything was terribly hurt. This went fine and they got out of there quickly, which always helps.

Hart and his family get to celebrate a bit.

Money In The Bank is getting its own pay per view.

We look at John Cena winning a Beat The Clock Challenge a few weeks ago, meaning he got to pick the stipulation for his match with Batista at Over The Limit. Then Sheamus jumped him from behind to lay him out.

We get a message from our sponsor: Santino Marella, parodying a Dos Equis beer commercial.

Laycool/Maryse vs. Bella Twins/Eve Torres

Layla (the real one) and McCool both have Women’s Titles. After a near brawl before the bell, Layla grabs a headlock on Eve to start before sweeping the legs and getting two off a rollup. Eve is right back with a neckbreaker for two and it’s Brie coming in, with Layla rolling her up for two. McCool gets in a cheap shot to take over and then comes in for some knees to the ribs. Layla misses a legdrop though and Nikki comes in…as McCool pulls her over the top. A monkey flip and Hennig necksnap get two on McCool but Maryse comes in with the French Kiss (DDT) to finish Nikki.

Rating: C-. To say the women’s division was not doing great around this time would be an understatement, and that almost non-existent crowd reaction didn’t make it much better. They did feel like they were trying and it helped, but there is only so much you can do to overcome these problems. It felt like they were going over every piece of their script and that doesn’t make for the best match.

Post match Maryse and Eve have to be held apart.

John Cena isn’t worried about his critics because he would rather speak to those who still support him. He and the Cenation have tasted victory and defeat but he has never not delivered on a promise. Tonight he is ready to take Sheamus out and then he will go on to face Batista in an I Quit match at Over The Limit. If Batista can make him quit, there will be no rematch because the champion should not be a quitter. Batista has hurt him before but Batista can’t make him quit. At Over The Limit, Batista will quit and the champ will be here.

Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger

This is Edge’s pick to face Orton and Swagger’s World Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Michael Cole lists off Swagger’s talents, including being a Scrabble champion. Orton takes him down to start and Swagger is already thinking twice about this. Orton’s backbreaker has Swagger down and we hit the slow motion stomp. The big knee misses though and Swagger hits a clothesline for two.

Orton fights out of a chinlock and Orton starts the comeback but Swagger bails to the floor. Back in and Swagger snaps off a belly to belly, setting up the running Vader Bomb. Swagger takes him outside to keep up the beating before grabbing another chinlock back inside. Orton fights up again and kicks him away, followed by the snap powerslam. Now the hanging DDT can connect and Orton loads up the RKO, only to have Edge come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The only thing this match did was remind me how awful Swagger was as champion. It wasn’t so much that he wasn’t skilled, but he felt completely out of place in this role and very far in over his head. Orton never felt like he was in serious trouble and that shouldn’t be the case against the World Champion.

Post match it’s an RKO to Swagger but Edge spears Orton down.

Over The Limit rundown.

Here is Buzz Aldrin for a chat. He’s happy to be here and talks about liking Swagger vs. Orton. Over the last few years, he’s been trying to make the space program better and we need new rockets and spacecraft. Canada has done some wonderful things as well, including building the landing gear on the craft he and Neil Armstrong used to land on the moon.

Finally Zack Ryder and Alicia Fox interrupt, with Ryder mocking Canada and their love of moose meat. Ryder implies that the moon landing was faked and we see a clip of Aldrin punching someone who said the same thing. Aldrin says he won’t pound Ryder…and we awkwardly pause until Evan Bourne and Gail Kim interrupt. Thankfully the match starts to wrap this up, as Aldrin was completely out of place here. That being said, who in the world thought he was a good choice to be in this spot?

Evan Bourne/Gail Kim vs. Zack Ryder/Alicia Fox

Bourne chops away to start and gets one off a sunset flip. Ryder comes back with a swinging neckbreaker as commentary mocks almost everything Aldrin was talking about and reference space movies. Everything breaks down and Kim hits a missile dropkick for two on Fox. Back up and Fox sends her to the floor as we talk about Aldrin on Dancing With The Stars. The neck crank doesn’t last long as it’s Ryder snapping off a running hurricanrana to Ryder. Fox breaks up the shooting star press, leaving Kim to hit Eat Defeat for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well, at least it was better than Aldrin. This was a rather out of nowhere tag match and save for maybe a brief feud, there was little reason to see these people fighting. As for Aldrin…yeah I’m not sure what they were thinking. He’s a celebrity but that doesn’t mean he belongs on a wrestling show. I don’t get the point of this, but that was the case with almost the entirety of the guest host period.

Post match Aldrin gets in to celebrate and even does something close to a moon walk.

Another ad, this one with Goldust as a blind date.

Sheamus vs. John Cena

Non-title. They start slowly with Sheamus taking him into the corner and stomping away. Cena shrugs that off and they head outside, where Sheamus is sent hard into the steps. Back up and Sheamus sends him into the barricade and they head back inside, where Sheamus gets to slowly hammer away. A suplex gets Cena out of trouble and he sends Sheamus into the post for another crash outside.

Back in and the AA attempt is countered so Cena settles for the ProtoBomb. Sheamus is back up to knock him to the apron for a running knee, which works so well that he does it again. Cena gets back in but the running bulldog is shrugged off. Sheamus slowly hammers away until Cena manages the flying shoulder to start the comeback. The threat of the AA has Sheamus grabbing the ropes but Batista runs in to jump Cena for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was better than almost anything else on the show and it shouldn’t be a surprise. Cena works well against power brawlers and that’s what you got to see here, as Sheamus continues to be someone Cena just can’t pin. It might not have been a classic, but it was a hard hitting brawl at the end of a not so great show and I’ll certainly take that here.

Post match Batista lays Cena out with a pair of spinebusters and grabs something like the Rings of Saturn to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The opener and the Hart stuff made this work as well as it did, but egads this era does not hold up well. For the parts that do work, there are even more things that miss almost entirely, like the Aldrin stuff (including the tag match), DiBiase and the women’s match. There is a reason you do not hear this period talked about very often and this was a good illustration of why that is the case.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Great American Bash 2008
Date: July 20, 2008
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 12,454
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We’re wrapping up the period before the Summerslam build here and the card is one sided to put it mildly. The Smackdown side is pretty much Edge challenging HHH for the Smackdown World Title, plus a four way Tag Team Title match. On the other side, Raw has John Cena vs. JBL in a parking lot fight, CM Punk defending the Raw World Title against Batista and Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho in a grudge match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Vickie Guerrero and Edge’s wedding, plus HHH revealing that Edge cheated on her the night before to end Smackdown. The other big matches get some attention of their own.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Edgeheads vs. Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Jesse and Festus

Miz and Morrison are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Festus clears the ring as tends to be his custom before Hornswoggle comes in for a stare…uh, up. Hornswoggle rolls up his sleeves but opts to dive onto Miz and Morrison instead. We settle down to Jesse monkey flipping Miz and knocking him down again for two. Festus beats on Miz as well before handing it off to Finlay. Morrison comes in and actually takes over on Finlay before bringing Miz back in for a chinlock.

It’s back to Morrison for his own chinlock as JR continues his Morrison to Rick Rude comparisons. Finlay fights up and double legs Miz down before doing the same thing to beat on Morrison. They collide in the corner so Ryder tags himself in to hammer Finlay down. The neck crank doesn’t last long on Finlay so Hawkins comes in to keep Finlay in trouble.

The Celtic Cross hits Hawkins and a shillelagh shot gets two, with Miz and Morrison making the save. Hawkins grabs a chinlock but Finlay is back up again, this time getting over to Hornswoggle to pick up the pace. Jesse tags himself in just as fast though and the fans are not pleased with the lack of Hornswoggle. Hawkins comes back in for a cheap shot on Hornswoggle but it’s back to Festus to really clean house. Miz and Morrison are sent outside and Hawkins breaks up the Rocket Launcher to pin Jesse and win the titles.

Rating: C+. It was a fast paced opener with a bunch of moving parts but they managed to keep the focus on just a few people at a time until the ending. Hawkins and Ryder winning the titles is the right way to go as Miz and Morrison have gotten everything they can out of them and La Familia is still the biggest thing on Smackdown. Give the team some more gold, as it’s not like Jesse and Festus or Hornswoggle/Finlay are worth anything.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and is quickly taken to the mat to start. A small package gives Hardy two as well as a breather but Benjamin is right back with a headlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as they’re certainly starting slowly. Benjamin sends him to the apron for a ram into the post, setting up the armbar back inside. A gutbuster sets up the seated abdominal stretch as commentary talks about Benjamin’s aggression, despite there being nothing to suggest it exists here.

Hardy fights up and tries a Side Effect but gets planted with something like an STO. Back up and Hardy blocks Paydirt to start the comeback and hits the bulldog out of the corner. Hardy’s middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a heck of a buckle bomb and they’re both down. A Side Effect gives Hardy two but the moonsault…I think it was supposed to hit knees but Hardy overshot it anyway. Paydirt gives Benjamin the pin and the title.

Rating: C. The match was far from bad, but it wasn’t exactly thrilling, as it came off as more of a house show match. The ending didn’t help things either as commentary had to scramble to cover Hardy missing. It’s not like hardy was doing anything with the title anyway so switching it over to Benjamin works as well as anything else.

We see an interview from Monday, with CM Punk talking about how he’s always been the underdog. It’s not about your size or muscle and he’s in the business of proving everyone wrong, which is what he’s always done.

We look at HHH revealing that Edge cheated on Vickie Guerrero the day before their wedding.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Henry is defending and has Tony Atlas in his corner while Dreamer has Colin Delaney. Dreamer charges at him and is quickly shoved into the corner, with Henry throwing him around again for a bonus. A hard clothesline puts Dreamer down again and Henry steps on his head as a few BORING chants start up.

Henry works on the arm (which is code for he leans over and grabs the wrist), Dreamer fights up, Henry takes him down and works on the arm again. The splash misses though and Dreamer hits the basement dropkick but has to escape the World’s Strongest Slam. The DDT puts Henry down and Dreamer goes up for no apparent reason, allowing Delaney to pull him down. Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam to retain.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of everything that is wrong with ECW. First of all, there was no reason to believe Dreamer was going to take the title. He hasn’t been nearly that important for a long time now and it wasn’t going to change here. Second, the Delaney turn doesn’t mean much as he’s a loser who didn’t exactly become a star when he was with Dreamer. Third, the match was really boring, which is quite ECW in a lot of ways. Rather dull stuff here and by far the worst thing on the show.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels, and thank goodness as the show needs it. Jericho claimed Michaels is a hypocrite (and was kind of right) and then took out his eye. Now Michaels is back for revenge and to prove that no matter what Jericho does, Michaels will always be better.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

They lock up to start and thankfully drop that in all of two seconds to start hitting each other in the face. Shawn gets the better of things with some chops and knocks Jericho into the corner before going after the leg. The reverse Figure Four has Jericho in early trouble but he’s in the ropes pretty quickly. Shawn stays on the leg and the referee stops things for a second to check on Jericho in the corner.

Jericho is fine enough to send Shawn over the corner and out to the apron, with Shawn favoring his back. The knee is fine enough to hit a triangle dropkick out to the floor before Jericho takes him inside for a double arm crank. With that broken up, Jericho dives into an atomic drop and Shawn drops him with the flying forearm. Shawn nips up but Jericho pulls him straight into the Walls, which is counter you don’t see very often.

This time Shawn makes the rope so Jericho loads up the bulldog, only to get dropped with a clothesline for two. The top rope elbow is broken up but Shawn wins a fight on top and now the elbow connects. Cue Lance Cade to break up the superkick but Shawn blocks the Codebreaker. They slug it out again until Shawn hiptosses him out onto Cade for the big crash. Naturally Shawn is right there with a moonsault onto the two of them and everyone is down again.

Back in and Shawn’s bad eye is busted open, with commentary not being sure when it was cut. Naturally Jericho goes right after the eye and knocks him into the ropes, where Cade gets in the cheap shot. The very bloody Shawn manages to pull him into a crossface but Jericho pulls him into the buckle for the violent escape. The referee wants to stop it but Shawn begs him not to, meaning Jericho is right back on the eye. Shawn is COVERED in blood and does the “pull myself up on the other guy’s tights” spot, only to have Jericho punch him down again and hammer away….until the referee finally stops it.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but there is almost no one better than Shawn at making you think he was dying in front of your eyes. Shawn was trying to fight and was still in there until the injury flared up again, along with Cade offering the distraction. This felt like the big middle piece in a bigger story and they pulled me in with the emotion and hatred. Awesome match and we’re almost certainly not done yet.

We get the emotional exit for Shawn, who has to be helped out.

Edge is really not pleased with HHH for violating his privacy and taking away his personal life. All Edge has left is his professional life and tonight, he will be extra dangerous.

Divas Title: Michelle McCool vs. Natalya

For the inaugural title but commentary is to busy talking about Edge/Vickie Guerrero. They grapple to the mat to start as commentary compares McCool to softball star Jennie Finch. Natalya wheelbarrow drops her throat first over the top to take over and we hit the surfboard to stay on McCool’s….well various parts. McCool powers out so Natalya switches to the Sharpshooter. That’s broken up as well and this time McCool pulls her into the heel hook for the title.

Rating: C-. These two were in the death slot as there was almost no way they were going to be able to follow the previous match. It doesn’t help that the match was almost a Natalya squash until McCool got in her one hold for the win. It’s rather nice for the women on Smackdown to have something to do, but they could use some more blood in the division or it is going to turn old fast.

Post match here is Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying you need to save your ticket stubs because this is the night of Shawn Michaels’ last match. Shawn has a detached retina and that means his career is over. It shows that the good guys win and the wicked are punished and the worst has finally come for Shawn. Jericho was feeling the evil here and it worked.

We recap CM Punk defending the World Title against Batista. Punk won Money In The Bank and used it to become champion, meaning he needs to prove himself worthy. Batista doesn’t seem to be overly intimidated so Punk is extra motivated.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and we go old school with a weapons check. Batista powers him around to start and Punk realizes he might need another plan. Some kicks to the legs slow Batista down but he elbows Punk in the face to cut him off. An enziguri knocks Batista outside and Punk follows him outside with a suicide dive.

Back in and Punk strikes away, only to be run over to give Batista two. The camel clutch goes on to keep Punk in trouble, which is broken up as camel clutches tend to be. Punk gets up a shot to the face in the corner and hits a high crossbody for two. The Batista Bomb is countered but a powerslam isn’t, meaning Punk has to counter the Bomb again.

Punk hits the running knee in the corner but can’t hit the GTS, instead settling for the springboard clothesline. The Anaconda Vice (been a minute since Punk used that) is broken up and Batista hits a heck of a clothesline. Batista’s charge hits the post and he falls outside, where he is able to catch a diving Punk with a spinebuster. Cue Kane to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They were starting to get somewhere but then just stopped for the DQ ending. This is either setting up a triple threat (erg) or Punk vs. Batista II, but Punk needs to win something on a big stage. It was bad enough that he got the title via Money In The Bank, but he’s lucky to crack the top five stars on Raw. This didn’t help things, though I guess Batista needed to be kept strong. Granted that makes me wonder why he was in the match in the first place, but I can picture Vince’s “oh it’s fine” face from here so we’ll move o.

Post match Kane lays out Punk, Batista, and a production worker. With Kane gone, Batista hits the Batista Bomb on Punk to make things even worse for the champ. Somehow this is a double DQ, despite Kane not touching Punk before the bell.

We recap John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield. With Vince McMahon gone, JBL has declared martial law but Cena isn’t having it. Now they’re going to fight in a parking lot.

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

This is taking place in the parking lot in a circle of cars and JBL shows up in his limo, fighting in most of a suit. There’s no Cena to start so JBL gets on a hood, only to have Cena pop up in another car and ram into him. Cena chokes him with a cord and then slams a car hood onto JBL’s back. Some jumper cables to the crotch set up some electrocution and JBL screams a lot.

JBL is put on another hood and Cena throws a well placed keg, only to hit windshield. With JBL trying to drive away, Cena grabs him for some rams into the horn. JBL fights back to little avail but manages to whip Cena through a car door, knocking it off the hinges. Cena gets punched off a car for two and then sent through the windshield of another for the big crash.

A crowbar shot misses for JBL and Cena slugs away but JBL sends him through a window. With nothing else working, JBL goes to grab some gasoline (with his limo rolling away) and douses one of the cars (with Cena inside). The car is lit on fire and promptly extinguished, with an annoyed looking Cena getting out. JBL goes over to a forklift but Cena is there to send him into another car.

Now Cena gets in the forklift and gores said car, only to lift it up and carry it into the arena. Commentary kicks in as Cena knocks JBL around and plants him with the ProtoBomb onto the stage. Cena loads up the FU but walks JBL over to the edge of the stage, only to take too long as JBL slips off. JBL sends him off the stage and through a windshield for the upset win.

Rating: C-. This was quite the situation and I wasn’t wild on most of it. They had a bunch of slow brawling in the back with car stuff before coming to the arena for a few minutes. JBL had to get a win of some sort but egads this means we’re going to have to hear him talk even more, which is about as painful of a thought as I can imagine. Not exactly great here, but what are you expecting from JBL?

We recap Edge vs. HHH for the latter’s Smackdown World Title. Vickie Guerrero gave Edge the title shot before their wedding but then Edge cheated on her the day before said wedding, with HHH revealing Edge’s, uh, indiscretion. Now it’s about the title, though Edge is more than a bit distracted.

HHH has no regrets over what he did.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Edge

HHH is defending and we get the Big Match Intros with a weapons check. Edge charges right at him and hammers away but gets sent outside. HHH sends him outside and grabs a neck snap across the top. A ram int the buckle has Edge on the floor again but he knocks a diving HHH out of the air. Back in and Edge hits the running shoulder in the corner before sending him outside for a whip into the steps.

A drop onto the announcers’ table keeps HHH’s ribs in trouble and Edge grabs a bodyscissors back inside. HHH fights up but gets dropkicked to the apron, where he sidesteps a spear to send Edge crashing to the floor. Back in and HHH slugs away before they go outside (again) with Edge going into the post. Edge is right back up though and grabs the Impaler on the floor, which means a rather delayed cover gets two.

HHH hits his own DDT for his own two but the Pedigree is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. The spear only hits buckle but Edge’s big boot only hits HHH’s jaw, leaving them both down again. Back up and the spear is countered into the spinebuster to give HHH a much needed breather. The Pedigree is countered again, this time with a ram into the corner. Edge takes him up top for a superplex but here is wedding planner Alicia Fox to send in the title. Cue Vickie Guerrero to take Alicia down and the catfight is on in the ring. The spear hits Vickie by mistake, allowing HHH to grab the Pedigree for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. It was good but they never came close to hitting that really high level. At the same time, it didn’t help that this was more about the Vickie/Edge stuff, with the title just kind of being there on the side. These two feel like they should have had their first big match on a more important show, but at least what they got to do here did work. It just could have been a pretty good bit better.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a perfectly fine show that should have been better than it was. There were some big matches on the card and those matches worked, but the lower card stuff is completely forgettable, even with three new champions being crowned. It’s a show where things happened, but it’s not a show that felt important. Instead, it came off like a “the big one is next time”, which doesn’t make for the most enjoyable event.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,748
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

The Draft has come and gone and now we have a new lineup around here. Some of the moves should make for some nice changes, though this is also the go home show for Sunday’s Night Of Champions. It should be interesting to see what happens with the new stars and the old stories, though Night Of Champions could be quite the endpoint for a lot of stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Draft recap.

Vickie Guerrero is rather sad as we hear about Vince McMahon nearly being crushed during Million Dollar Mania. She hopes Vince isn’t confined to a wheelchair like she is. That moves us on to how great Smackdown is, because she and Edge are getting married soon. With that out of the way, here’s new broadcaster Jim Ross!

Here is HHH to get things going. He talks about how crazy Vince McMahon is and makes jokes about how everything came crashing down on him. Anyway, for the first time in six years, he’s part of Smackdown and he sees the familiar faces of Mick Foley and Jim Ross. HHH says jr would be the one person he would pick to bring here with him (JR: “Thank you.”) so he’s home.

HHH gets in the self described sucking up to the fans before getting to the self described shilling of Sunday’s pay per view. The title is what matters so here is Edge to interrupt. Edge says this is special and big because the two best around are in the ring. He’s heard rumors that they can’t get along but Edge thinks they can make it work. HHH says they both have massive egos and he can see that his is way bigger than Edge’s.

The other difference: HHH will still be champion after Night Of Champions. Edge points out that he can actually beat Batista, unlike HHH. This is Edge’s house and show, so HHH needs to show him some respect. Cue Batista to interrupt and spear Edge down without much trouble. Batista even steals the title for a bonus. That was kind of a cool segment, with the mini Evolution reunion working.

Kane/Big Show vs. MVP/Mark Henry

Henry has been added to the ECW Title match at Night Of Champions after beating Kane on ECW. Kane and MVP start things off with the latter kicking away at the legs until an uppercut drops MVP. It’s off to Show to unload in the corner and knock MVP down without much effort. Henry comes in to cut off the power advantage so it’s right back to Kane. It doesn’t go so well this time around as Henry takes him into the corner for a boot to the head from MVP. Kane fights up so MVP tells Henry to do this himself and leaves…but Henry throws him back inside. The chokeslam gives Kane the fast pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and Kane continuing his dominance of MVP is amusing for some reason. It makes sense to keep everyone but MVP strong as MVP doesn’t exactly have much going on at the moment. This was more about letting Kane get some heat back after his loss to Henry on ECW and it worked just fine all things considered.

Vickie Guerrero discusses wedding plans with Alicia Fox but Edge interrupts. Vickie tells him to not worry about Batista because he’ll be gone. He’ll even get the title back tonight.

Video on Umaga.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Ryder drives Finlay into the corner to start but an atomic drop breaks that up in a hurry. Hawkins comes in and misses a baseball slide, allowing Finlay to unload with forearms. Back up and Finlay sends Hawkins outside, setting up the Celtic Cross to Ryder. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come out for the staredown.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Edge grabs a drop toehold to continue to technical opening. Back up and Matt hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for two as commentary isn’t sure if that would be an upset (yes, it would be). We take a break and come back with Matt blocking the Edge-O-Matic. Edge gets sent outside and Matt nails a clothesline off the apron but a cheap shot cuts Matt off back inside.

Choking on the ropes sets up a running crotch attack to the back of the neck and Edge kicks him in the chest. The cravate has Matt in more trouble but he fights up and grabs the Side Effect for two. That lets Foley get in a Get Smart reference, making him all the more swell. A DDT gives Matt two but he misses the moonsault. Edge misses the spear but gets two off a backslide with his feet on his rope. Back up and the Twist of Fate is countered into the spear to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and the ending sequence was good. I’m not wild on seeing the US Champion losing but at least it was to someone higher up on the food chain. Edge gets some momentum heading into his title match on Sunday while Matt…eh he’s defending against Chavo Guerrero so he’ll be fine.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Victoria/Natalya Neidhart/Maryse

Michelle and Maryse start things off with Michelle cranking on the arm. Maryse immediately bails out to bring Victoria in, with Kelly coming in as well. Foley remembers wearing chaps like Kelly and JR backs away as fast as he can. Cherry comes in and bulldogs Kelly for two as they’re rapid firing through the tags. It’s back to Michelle for a basement dropkick on Natalya, who is right back with the a wheelbarrow hot shot. The surfboard has Michelle in more trouble, followed by the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a chinlock but Victoria comes in to cut Michelle off again. The standing moonsault gives Victoria two as Foley wants to see more of Kelly’s chaps. Foley: “I’m just trying to give you a little Jerry The King Lawler JR.” Kelly gets in a kick to the ribs, setting up one of the most freezing cold tags I’ve ever seen as Cherry comes in. A neckbreaker gets two on Maryse but Natalya gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Everything breaks down and Maryse rolls Cherry up for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly good and I have no idea why they haven’t just announced Michelle for the title match yet. She’s the most obvious pick they could have but they’re still playing the “who is it going to be” nonsense. Am I supposed to believe that Cherry is getting a title shot? Anyway, this match was pretty lame, as it was almost Michelle in a handicap match.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Domino

Kozlov powers him into the corner to start and works on the arm. A shot to the chest sets up an overhead belly to belly suplex but Domino manages to drop him with a jumping elbow. Back up and Kozlov kicks him in the face, setting up the reverse DDT for the pin, though he had to work a bit more here.

Rey Mysterio, on the way to the ring for his final Smackdown appearance, runs into Hornswoggle for some odd…uh, looking at each other.

Here is Rey Mysterio for his final Smackdown appearance. He came to Smackdown six years ago with a heart full of dreams. Thanks to the fans, he became Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion and the World Heavyweight Champion. Smackdown will always have a place in his heart but now he is heading to Raw. The fans are offered to come along with him and we get some nice words in Spanish to wrap things up.

Batista vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and then breaks up an early Batista Bomb attempt. A splash gives Umaga two and there’s a hard kick to the back of Batista’s head. Batista gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Umaga cuts off the comeback with a kick to the face and a jumping headbutt puts him down again. We’re off to another nerve hold but Batista fights up. A slam attempt doesn’t work so Umaga knocks him back into the corner to hammer away some more. Umaga misses a splash and hits the ring post though and there’s the spinebuster. Cue La Familia to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not the most exciting match here as Umaga almost squashed him until the run-in ending. Umaga needed the boost after spinning his wheels for a long time, though having him do this to the #1 contender was a little strange. The bigger problem here was the match being rather slow though as these two have never had much chemistry together.

Post match the big beatdown is on but HHH makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts here but it wasn’t their best show. The problem is they were trying to build to the show with the old lineup but then had to introduce the new wrestlers. That made for a weird balance and they only kind o pulled it off. Things will be in their new normal next week though and that should make things a lot better.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: June 20, 2008
Location: HP Pavilion, San Jose, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Mick Foley

We’re coming up on Night Of Champions and Edge vs. Batista for the Smackdown World Title is already set. That alone should cover the Smackdown side of things but there are still a few other matches that could be added to the show. In addition, we are coming up on the Draft next week so things are going to be shaken up again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with MVP in the VIP Lounge. MVP gets straight to the point by talking about the Draft, where EVERYONE can be sent to another show. He’s cool with going anywhere because he gets paid anywhere he goes. Maybe the people around here just don’t pay attention to his talents because they’re too busy getting married.

Cue Vickie Guerrero and the Edgeheads, with Vickie saying she doesn’t need this kind of treatment before her wedding. Last week, MVP beat CM Punk like he was supposed to but Vickie says that he didn’t take Punk out. Not that it matters, as Vickie backed out of their contract negotiations. Maybe MVP just doesn’t want to be here, but Vickie doesn’t have time for this. Therefore, tonight MVP can face Kane.

Matt Hardy vs. Bam Neely

Non-title and Chavo Guerrero is here with Neely. The bigger Neely knocks him into the corner to start as Cole says Neely calls himself the One Man Fence. With that stupid name out of the way, Matt gets dropped throat first across the top for two and we hit the chinlock. This lets Cole hype Million Dollar Mania and brag about the ratings success.

Matt fights up but can’t get the Side Effect, instead allowing Neely to kick him in the face for two. The chinlock with a bodyscissors goes on but Matt jawbreaks his way to freedom. Neely charges into a raised boot in the corner and a middle rope bulldog gives Matt two. Chavo offers a distraction though, only to be ejected almost immediately. Matt grabs the Twist of Fate for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was a good example of why Neely wasn’t put in the ring very often, as this wasn’t exactly a great match. Neely is just a big guy with a slightly intimidating bald head but that’s about all there is for his strong points. Matt vs. Chavo should at least be better, but Chavo is only so interesting in the first place.

Video on Edge vs. Batista.

Post break Chavo Guerrero yells about the referee to Edge but Edge needs him to do something tonight: face Batista.

Michelle McCool vs. Layla

Foley reads a song he wrote about Michelle, which sounds a lot like Sweet Child Of Mine. Layla knocks her down to start and we’re off to the early chinlock. A legdrop gives Layla two and we’re back to the chinlock as Natalya comes out to watch. Michelle kicks her way out of trouble and hits a clothesline into a dropkick. A belly to belly gives Michelle two before a heel hook makes Layla tap.

Rating: C. Michelle continues to get better in the ring and has clearly put in the effort to become a more well rounded star. You might as well pencil her in for the Night Of Champions match against Natalya, as at least these women will have something to fight over after all this time. Layla continues to have the attitude, but there isn’t anything to back that up in the ring.

Edge comes in to Vickie Guerrero’s office and asks Alicia Fox to leave so they can talk about the wedding. Referee Charles Robinson comes in and Vickie yells at him for biased officiating, including ejecting Chavo Guerrero earlier tonight. That’s why he’ll be in the ring later. As a wrestler.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jamie Noble

Noble’s single leg doesn’t work as Kozlov wrestles him down without much trouble. Kozlov throws him around again as Foley gives us a history of Sambo, following Kozlov forcing him to read a book about it. A Guillotine choke slows Kozlov down for a change but he drives Noble into the corner for the break. Noble fights up but Kozlov headbutts him out of the air without much effort for the win.

Rating: C. They’re bringing Kozlov along slowly but logically, as he gets to beat a slightly bigger name, which should mean he wants some bigger competition soon. That should open up some more interesting doors for him, though he still isn’t exactly the most interesting monster villain in the world. That headbutt does look good though.

Kane vs. MVP

Non-title. Kane uppercuts him down to start and drops a fast elbow but gets caught in a headscissors of all things. Back up and Kane hits another uppercut and a powerslam gets two. MVP’s running boot in the corner gets the same and we hit the neck crank. Kane gets up and hits a side slam into the top rope clothesline but it’s too early for the chokeslam. Instead Kane shoves him out to the floor….where MVP just takes the countout.

Rating: C+. Somehow that might be the best match of the night here as Kane continues his dominance of MVP in a long running story. Other than that though, there wasn’t much to be seen here as they mainly stayed on the mat until Kane got fired up near the end. MVP seems to be stepping up a bit though and it’s nice to see that include a countout instead of taking a pin.

Post match Mark Henry comes in to lay out Kane.

Chavo Guerrero wishes a confused Charles Robinson luck.

Video on WWE’s work with Make-A-Wish.

Charles Robinson vs. Great Khali

Robinson tries to run but the Edgeheads throw him back inside for the bell. There’s the chop but Khali picks him up at two. Then he does it a few more times before finishing with the vice.

Robinson does a stretcher job.

Deuce N Domino vs. Jesse And Festus

Yes again. Festus wrecks them at the bell so Deuce N Domino brawl with each other on the floor. Deuce sends Domino back inside so the destruction can be completed. The fireman’s carry flapjack finishes Domino in a hurry.

Post match Deuce lays Domino out again.

We look at Hornswoggle and Finlay getting a Tag Team Title shot on ECW and Finlay laying out Miz.

Finlay vs. Miz

Hornswoggle and John Morrison are here too, with the latter joining commentary. Finlay grabs a headlock takeover to start and then runs him over with a clothesline for two. Back up and Miz manages to get in a kick to the ribs before knocking Finlay outside for a change. Miz stomps away back inside and we hit the cravate. That doesn’t last long as Finlay fights back and hits the running seated senton. Morrison goes after Hornswoggle, but it distracts Miz by mistake. That’s enough for Finlay to hit the Celtic Cross for the pin.

Rating: C. This hasn’t been a banner night for in-ring action and that was the case again here, with a mostly boring match to set up a Tag Team Title match that is only so interesting in the first place. Hornswoggle and Finlay are certainly fresh challengers though and that is one of the best things that could happen to the titles at the moment.

Mission Dollar Mania recap.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Batista

Bam Neely is here with Chavo. Hold on though as here is Vickie Guerrero to make Edge the guest referee and if Batista touches him, there’s no title match. Chavo’s headlock doesn’t get him very far as Batista shoulders him down without much effort. Batista cranks on the arm in the corner and grabs a Jackhammer for a very delayed two.

Edge even trips Batista down as they’re not bothering with the subtle stuff here. Neely gets in some choking but Chavo gets pulled out of the air. That earns Batista another trip from Edge so Chavo can get two and the chinlock goes on. Batista fires up and hits a backdrop into a powerslam, only to have Neely pull him outside for a one second countout.

Rating: C+. This was more a storyline advancement than much of a match and that’s the best way to go with something like this one. Batista continues to have to work to finally get his hands on Edge at the end of the road and that can take some time. They’re doing well enough here, and now Batista is going to be furious with just one Smackdown left before Night Of Champions.

Post match La Familia comes in to beat Batista down. Edge hits a spear to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Not much of a show here, as Night Of Champions has one noteworthy Smackdown match and that is all but set. Other than that, there isn’t much to do here and the wrestling wasn’t much better. Hopefully things change a bit next week, because another show like this one sounds very, very tiring. Not a bad show, but a completely skippable one.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: June 13, 2008
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re well on the way to Night Of Champions and Batista is the new #1 contender to Edge’s Smackdown World Title. That alone should make for a good build towards the show, but we’re going to need more than that. Smackdown’s midcard might not be the strongest, but I’m sure we’ll have some Chuck Palumbo involved. Let’s get to it.

Vickie Guerrero is in the ring and we’re starting big with a contract signing. Batista comes out first but won’t sit down, even after Vickie offers him the chance. Vickie hypes up Edge a bit but since he has already signed the contract, he won’t be needed at the moment. She signs as well and tells Batista he needs to, but then won’t hand it over. Apparently Batista has to beat Great Khali tonight to really become #1 contender. That’s fine with Batista, who calls Vickie ugly and leaves. Hold on though as Vickie says if Batista loses tonight, he’s out of WWE. Vickie: “You’re dismissed.”

Finlay vs. John Morrison

Hornswoggle and Miz are here and this is a rather unique match. Finlay runs him over with a shoulder to start so Morrison heads to the floor. A legsweep takes Finlay down for a change but he ties Morrison up in the ring skirt. Hornswoggle is thrown at Miz to break up some interference but Morrison scores with a kick to take over. We hit the chinlock back inside before a neckbreaker gives Morrison two more. Finlay comes back with some clotheslines but Miz goes after Hornswoggle again. That’s enough of a distraction for Morrison to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: C. I could go for more of these two but this was more about setting things up for later. Finlay and Hornswoggle are at least a fresh team but I’m not sure I’d get behind the idea of them as serious challengers. Granted that might not be the case anytime soon as Finlay lost here, though I do like seeing a fresh match.

We’ll be looking at some classic Batista moments, like winning the 2005 Royal Rumble.

Edge likes the idea of honoring Batista before he’s gone from WWE, just like he did with Undertaker. Cue CM Punk to hint at cashing in the Money In The Bank briefcase at Edge’s wedding next month.

Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Before the match, we see a clip of Henry promising to give Big Show another black eye at Night Of Champions. Henry shoves him into the corner without much trouble to start and knocks him down for a kick to the back. There’s another slam to set up a headbutt in the corner as this is total destruction. Dreamer gets a boot up in the corner and slugs away but the DDT is blocked. The World’s Strongest Slam finishes Dreamer without much trouble.

Edge comes in to see Vickie Guerrero, who is planning her wedding with wedding planner Alicia Fox. He’s worried about the threat of a CM Punk cash-in but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP wants to renegotiate his contract because his talents are being underutilized. Edge doesn’t want to hear it so MVP says he could take the title. Anyway, he wants a new contract but Vickie points out that Teddy Long gave him the original. She’ll consider it…if he takes care of this CM Punk issue. Works for MVP.

Cherry vs. Maryse

Cherry takes her down and hammers away to start so Maryse bails into the corner. Back up and Maryse kicks the leg out to take over and we hit the cravate. Cherry fights up and slugs away, setting up a hammerlock DDT for the fast pin. Not much to this one.

Video on the Great Khali.

MVP vs. CM Punk

Punk wrestles him to the mat to start before grabbing a headlock. MVP reverses into one of his own for a bit, only to have Punk pop up. A spinwheel kick drops MVP and we hit the chinlock again. MVP slips out and grabs an armbar and cranks away for a bit. Punk is able to fight out with his good arm as they’re certainly not breaking out of second gear so far.

A missed charge sends Punk’s bad arm into the post and MVP sends it in twice more. We take a break and come back with MVP hammering away and grabbing a Fujiwara armbar. Punk fights out so MVP puts on another armbar. Back up again and Punk is able to hit a kick to the head for two and a hurricanrana gets the same.

Punk goes up top but the elbow only hits raised knees. With nothing else working, MVP pulls off a turnbuckle pad and uses the distraction to grab the Money In The Bank briefcase. Punk scores with the jumping knee to the head and takes the briefcase back (it’s his after all) but the referee sees it and calls the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was the wrestling match of the show and it got a lot of time, but the armbars took up a good bit of the time. They made sense given what MVP was tasked with doing but that didn’t make for an interesting match. At least Punk didn’t get pinned again, as they seem to be getting close to the cash-in, or certainly teasing the heck out of the thing.

Video on Edge winning the World Title by beating Undertaker in a TLC match.

Here is Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, to announce that he will be Edge’s best man. In addition, at Night Of Champions, he’ll beat Matt Hardy for the US Title!

Matt Hardy vs. Chuck Palumbo

Non-title. Palumbo powers him into the corner to start and kicks Matt outside. Back in and Palumbo hits a belly to back suplex into a chinlock as the pace stays slow. Palumbo misses a top rope legdrop for two and Matt grabs the Side Effect for two. The Twist of Fate finishes Palumbo soon after.

Rating: C. Palumbo continues to hang around and he’s oddly starting to grow on me. At the end of the day, he’s never going to be a big star but he’s someone who can handle a middle of the road spot like this and do just fine. That’s a role that you need to have on any show and Palumbo, while not great, is doing it well enough.

Video on Batista winning his first World Title at Wrestlemania XXI.

Video on the first week of Million Dollar Mania.

Vladimir Kozlov is asked about better competition and answers in Russian.

Video on Batista winning the World Title at Survivor Series 2006.

Jesse & Festus vs. Deuce N Domino

Festus runs both of them outside to start before Jesse drop toeholds Deuce down to start. Jesse gets taken into the corner though and the double teaming is on quickly. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Jesse kicks his way out. Festus comes back in to clean house, including an uppercut to Domino. A sitdown splash gives Festus the pin.

Rating: C-. These teams feel like they have been fighting each other in circles for months and neither has shown any signs of moving up the ladder. At some point you need to do something that actually matters or otherwise this is just filler. The Festus Is A Monster deal has gone about as far as it can and it’s not getting any better. In other words, it’s a WWE tag team problem, as they continue to prove why there isn’t enough depth for two sets of titles.

Post match Deuce N Domino go at it, with Domino getting the better of things and walking off. And the depth lowers again.

Video on Batista vs. Great Khali from 2007.

Batista vs. Great Khali

If Batista wins he gets a Night Of Champions title shot but if he loses, he’s fired. Edge and Vickie Guerrero come out to watch as Khali chops away in the corner. Batista tries to fight back and we take a break. Back with Khali headbutting him to the floor before dropping the leg. Khali hits the elbow in the corner but Batista reverses for the shoulders to the ribs. The chokebomb gets two and we hit the nerve hold. Batista fights up and blocks the chop, setting up the sear for the fast pin.

Rating: C. As usual, keeping things short is the right way to go for Khali and Batista gets the win to set up the title match. It wasn’t the most interesting drama but they were in and out of there in about five minutes. They built it up over one night but it worked out well enough for a single night main event.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was almost all about setting up the Batista vs. Edge match and it went well enough. That being said, they needed something else to make things interesting and that was lacking pretty badly. Smackdown doesn’t have the most depth in the storyline department at the moment and as has been the case for a long time now, they need to work on that.

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 16, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This was a request for reasons not quite clear. It’s night after Summerslam and the big story is John Cena and company vanquished the Nexus, in a match that saw Cena overcome some rather insane odds. Other than that, Sheamus is still Raw World Champion, having retained the title over Randy Orton. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here is the Nexus to get things going, with commentary saying that the team showed they belong despite losing last night. Wade Barrett (the team’s leader) says they beat SIX of the best that Raw had to offer last night (keep in mind that it was a 7 on 7 tag match) and they are still ready to dominate WWE. They were defeated and that means there will be consequences for Raw.

Cue John Cena, to say that Barrett has the resolve of Winston Churchill and the toughness of Snooki from the Jersey Shore. Cena brings up how Barrett tapped out to cause the team to lose. The reality is that Nexus is expendable and Barrett must be kicking himself in the fish and chips over letting Daniel Bryan go. Then last night Bryan eliminated over half of the Nexus by himself as they proved that Nexus can be defeated.

You have the various members of the team, such as Otunga (an above average male escort), Tarver (looks like a stripper), Heath Slater (the chick from Wendy’s…..so Wendy), Darren Young (a cross between Cena and Buckwheat), Justin Gabriel (he has an “alternative” way of thinking) and Skip Sheffield (who thinks the Meow Mix theme).

All that matters is they are a bunch of humans, with Young tapping out in less than a minute. We get an email from the anonymous Raw General Manager (egads the flashbacks), saying tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a bunch of singles matches, with threats made against Nexus interference.

Barrett doesn’t like hearing that he tapped out, but promises that after tonight, Nexus will be stronger than ever. If any of them lose though, their spots might not be safe. Otunga says that’s fine, but if Barrett loses, someone else can step up and take the leadership. We get another email, saying Nexus can pick their matchups tonight. Except for Barrett that is, because he gets to face Chris Jericho. So there’s your show tonight, and they did it in about fifteen minutes. That’s fairly fast for some Raw opening segments.

Chris Jericho vs. Wade Barrett

Jericho kicks him down to start as the rest of Nexus is shown watching in the back. There’s the triangle dropkick to send Barrett outside but he’s able to knock Jericho off the apron for a breather. There’s a big boot to drop Jericho again and we hit the double arm crank. Jericho fights up and hits a middle rope dropkick, followed by the bulldog. A quick Wasteland attempt is countered into the Walls, sending Barrett straight to the rope. Back up and Jericho boots him in the face again, only to get caught with an enziguri. The Codebreaker is loaded up but Barrett reverses into the Wasteland for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. Jericho can be criticized for a lot of things, but he has a reputation as someone who will put just about anyone over. That is a big win for Barrett, especially after last night’s big loss. Barrett being able to hang with someone at Jericho’s level helps him a lot and they had a good match to show what Barrett can do.

This week’s guest hosts are Jason Sudekis, Charlie Day and Justin Long. They have a new moving coming out and seemingly have no idea what to talk about here so they just make weird noises. We hear some NBA insults before the team introduces the Hart Dynasty (Tag Team Champions).

Hold on though as we get another email. As of tonight, the Unified Tag Team Titles will now be known as the WWE Tag Team Titles, so here is Bret Hart with the new (bronze, because of course) titles. Thankfully that means dropping the dumb four belts for two people idea but here is Nexus on the screen. They have picked Hart’s opponent for tonight: Justin Gable, who promises a 450 to Bret. At least those morons were off quick.

We hear about Daniel Bryan replacing the injured Great Khali on Team WWE. No clip for that?

Michael Tarver vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan goes after the arm to start as Cole goes off about Bryan having no skill or change of becoming a star because he doesn’t eat meat. The rapid fire kicks to the chest in the corner have Tarver in more trouble and a missile dropkick makes it worse. Cue Miz and Alex Riley for a distraction though, allowing Tarver to get the fast rollup pin.

Post match Bryan goes after the Miz but Riley and Tarver take him down. The Skull Crushing Finale onto Miz’s Money In The Bank briefcase leaves Bryan laying.

Post break Miz and Riley talk about how they don’t like Bryan’s popularity, with Miz promising that Riley will be the next breakout star.

Darren Young tells Nexus that he’ll be facing John Cena. Pep talking ensues.

Justin Gabriel vs. Bret Hart

Actually hold on as we get an email saying there is a replacement.

Justin Gabriel vs. Randy Orton

Orton (in his weird bare arms phase) powers him into the corner to start but Gabriel flips over him and starts kicking away. As Lawler tries to figure out what kind of animal Gabriel is poking here (before finally remembering the whole VIPER thing), Orton snaps off the powerslam and the hanging DDT. The RKO is loaded up but cue Sheamus for….not a DQ as Orton brawls with him into the crowd for the countout instead. Well that was a dumb way out of the stipulation.

Post match Orton goes back inside to RKO Gabriel. With that not being enough, Orton grabs a chair and unloads on Sheamus to blow off some steam. That’s not enough so Orton drops Sheamus with the RKO on the floor for a bonus.

Skip Sheffield/David Otunga vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

Morrison works on Otunga’s arm to start before grabbing a Russian legsweep. It’s off to Sheffield to powerslam Truth but Otunga comes back in and gets Downward Spiraled. Cole asks what a Truth/Morrison win would mean for the locker room’s psyche. I’m thinking….not much? Anyway Morrison comes back in to pick up the pace but Sheffield runs him over. One heck of a running clothesline finishes Morrison to keep Nexus undefeated.

Melina/Eve Torres/Gail Kim vs. Jillian/Maryse/Alicia Fox

Gail easily takes Maryse down to start and calls her a gold digger. A crossbody gives Gail two and it’s off to Melina, who is taken into the wrong corner. Fox hits her always nice looking northern lights suplex and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up and Eve comes in with a bunch of dropkicks. Everything breaks down and Eve hits an enziguri out of the corner to drop Jillian. The moonsault is loaded up but Jillian rolls her up out of the corner for the big upset pin.

Edge isn’t surprised that he led Team WWE to victory last night but here is Heath Slater to interrupt. They’re facing each other tonight and Heath tries to get him to back out. That’s not going to work for Edge, who isn’t losing to a Wendy looking Edge wannabe. Heath decks him and leaves.

Edge vs. Heath Slater

Edge knocks him into the corner without too much trouble to start but Heath gets in a cheap shot. They head outside with Edge being sent into the barricade, followed by the armbar back inside. That’s broken up and Edge makes the clothesline comeback for two. Heath gets in his own clothesline for two, with a fan shouting “I HATE YOU HEATH SLATER! I HATE YOU!” Back up and Edge sends him (Heath, not the fan) outside but misses the baseball slide dropkick. The spear against the steps misses….and Heath beats the count back inside for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well that was nothing, but it’s getting more than a little tough to accept that after eliminating all seven members last night, Team WWE can’t beat a single member of the Nexus here. That doesn’t makes the most sense and it’s leading to some rather screwy finishes. This didn’t feel like something Edge would ever fall for and it’s not something I would buy him doing, which doesn’t exactly make for a strong finish.

Post match Edge hits a spear to blow off some steam.

The hosts are in the back with Great Khali and talk about long distances relationships (which is why Khali hasn’t been doing the Kiss Cam). Justin Long sees a picture of Khali’s girlfriend and the other hosts aren’t impressed. They then find out that Khali understands English, but he admits the girlfriend is ugly. Then he leaves with the Bellas. Cole: “WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?”

Video on Summerslam week, including a bunch of charity stuff.

John Cena vs. Darren Young

No entrance for Young and that can’t be a good sign. Hold on though as cue Nexus to watch from the stage and Young gets two off a fast rollup to start. Young grabs a headlock and my goodness you can hear the spots being called despite a fairly rowdy crowd. Cena reverses into a headlock of his own but gets suplexed down, setting up a legdrop for two more. Cole: “Remember Young has to win this match.” Lawler: “I think Cena has to win this match.” Cole: “I agree with you.”

A clothesline and neckbreaker give Young two each and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Back up and Cena….charges into an elbow in the corner as this has been one sided so far. Young drops a leg, Cena says “one more leg”, Young drops another leg. A northern lights suplex gets two more and Young is getting frustrated. With nothing else working, Young tosses him outside and then into the steps for a nine count. Back in and Cena quickly starts the comeback, setting up the Shuffle into the STFU for the tap.

Rating: C+. For someone who almost never got used on his own, Young can wrestle a decent match when he is given the chance. Granted having Cena call spots REALLY LOUDLY might have helped, but it was the best Young ever looked in WWE. At some point someone from Nexus had to lose and Young was the only one left by the end.

Post match the Nexus comes to the ring but let Cena go, instead circling Young. The big beatdown is on, with the Wasteland into the 450 splash destroying Young to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Normally I like the idea of focusing on one thing throughout the show but this was extreme even by WWE standards. Other than the women’s match and some dumb stuff with the hosts, this was all about one storyline. Throw in Nexus dominating most of the show and this wasn’t exactly interesting, with Nexus dominating most of the show despite losing last night. Not a good show, as the Nexus story was instantly a lot lamer after the Summerslam loss. Focusing on a big story is fine, but you have to mix it up a bit.

 

 

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