ECW on Sci Fi
Date: August 28, 2007
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Summerslam has come and gone and since ECW doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme of WWE, there is only one match of note. In this case, that would be John Morrison retaining his ECW World Title over CM Punk (again). That means Morrison needs a new challenger and we’re getting another #1 contenders match. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is John Morrison (in slow motion) to brag about retaining the ECW World Title. At Summerslam, he united the people and created CM Punk’s new reality when he beat Punk again. Since there is a four way tonight to crown a new #1 contender, let’s look at the four men who want to join the Palace of Wisdom. There is the Boogeyman, who is coming to get him, but Morrison is beyond good and evil and it takes more than worms to scare him.

Then we have the Miz, who says he is a chick magnet, but actions speak louder than words. Hoorah. Third is Big Daddy V, and let’s hope he doesn’t win for the sake of humanity. Finally there is CM Punk, and come on already. Let’s take a look at his straightedge lifestyle. Punk doesn’t do anything, which seems to include winning titles. Oh but he does get tattoos. Imagine if he got a tattoo for every time Morrison beat him! None of the four are going to beat Morrison anyway so it doesn’t matter.

Stevie Richards vs. Kevin Thorn

Richards has had Thorn’s number as of late and Thorn is about to snap. Thorn pounds on Richards to start and stomps him down in the corner as the anger comes out. A beal sends Richards flying again and a comeback is cut off with a drop across the corner. Richards’ throat is dropped across the ropes and Thorn drives him hard into the barricade. The Razor’s Edge is countered so Thorn clotheslines him down to stay on the throat. Richards starts kicking away for two of his own and a rollup is good for the same. That’s enough for Thorn, who hits a torture rack backbreaker and the Original Sin finishes Richards off.

Rating: C-. This was little more than a squash, but it was also disappointing. Richards had gotten a small push in the last few weeks and then he just loses here. Thorn isn’t exactly an exciting option for a heel and I’m not sure how far he is going to be able to go even with this story over. Richards didn’t have the brightest future, but I was more interested in his winning streak than anything Thorn is probably doing.

Video on the Boogeyman.

Balls Mahoney runs into the Miz and Extreme Expose. Miz was shocked Mahoney won last week, but Kelly Kelly doesn’t seem thrilled. They even cut her off from saying anything, leaving Brook and Layla to call Mahoney a loser. The four of them go to leave, with Kelly wishing Mahoney luck.

John Morrison is in Armando Estrada’s office to find out who is going to be the new #1 contender. CM Punk pops in, with Morrison saying he wants another title shot handed to him. Punk says he’ll earn it, without having to put his feet on the ropes like Morrison did at Summerslam. Violence is teased, but Punk eats cantaloupe instead. Morrison: “That guy has got some serious daddy issues.”

Balls Mahoney vs. Elijah Burke

Miz and Extreme Expose are at ringside. Burke jumps Mahoney to start, earning himself some shots to the face. The comeback has Kelly Kelly up and cheering, which doesn’t sit well with everyone else. Some more shots to the face put Mahoney down for two but the fans are behind him anyway.

The headstand elbow in the corner sets up a front facelock as Kelly continues to play cheerleader. An STO plants Mahoney to cut off a comeback and the chinlock is on. That’s the trigger to a comeback (of course) and Mahoney hits the Nutcracker Suite for two. Burke catches him up top with a superplex though and the Elijah Express is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. Much like the previous match, someone who won a match to start a little something loses to the bigger star, cutting off almost any interest there might have been. It also isn’t the best sign for Miz’s chances tonight if he’s involved with Mahoney here. The Kelly deal is kind of interesting, but it would be better if she hadn’t done the same thing with CM Punk last year.

Post match Miz laughs at Mahoney’s loss but Kelly Kelly checks on him before leaving.

Miz vs. CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V vs. Boogeyman

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a future ECW World Title shot. Miz is in the ring when we come back from a break, despite going to the back before the break. Matt Striker is here with V as a bonus. Everyone goes after V to start and get knocked away without much effort. V starts splashing people in the corner, with Miz being knocked outside. Boogeyman starts the comeback but gets pulled to the floor instead. Punk is thrown to the floor but V would rather chop Miz.

There’s a chop to Punk to keep things even as the pain continues. V misses a charge and falls over the barricade, leaving Miz to knee Boogeyman down. Back in and Miz hits the running clothesline for two on Punk, who comes back with a slam. The legdrop misses though and Miz grabs a fairly illogical chinlock. Punk breaks that up without much trouble and hits a running knee. The springboard clothesline gives Punk two and the GTS finishes Miz for the title shot.

Rating: D+. What a weird match. Miz vs. Punk was perfectly fine, but this wasn’t a Miz vs. Punk match. Boogeyman and V disappeared for most of the match, which wasn’t that long in the first place. I’m not sure what happened to Boogeyman there, but at least there was a reason for V to be gone. Weird match, though at least they didn’t waste time with anything but the only real choice for a winner.

Post match V slams Boogeyman on the floor and stares at Punk, who gets out before he being crushed.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t their strongest showing, as it was more about getting things back to normal, which meant cutting the legs off from some people who were making some headway. Punk vs. Morrison again might be boring, but who else is there to go after the title? This needs to be Punk’s big win though, as he can only take so many losses. Not a good show this week though, and that isn’t the greatest surprise given the show’s issues with lack of talent depth.

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Dynamite
Date: February 2, 2022
Location: Wintrust Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Excalibur, Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone

We’re back in Chicago, where a lot of big things tend to happen. There is a good chance that will be the case again here as we have a major main event between CM Punk and MJF. These two have been going at it for a long time now and we should be in for a heck of a blowoff (maybe) here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Jon Moxley vs. Wheeler Yuta

Yuta, with Orange Cassidy and Danhausen, is taking Brian Kendrick’s place after some previous controversial comments resurfaced. Moxley runs him over to start and knocks Yuta outside for a quickly broken sleeper. Back in and Moxley ties him up in something like an STF, sending Yuta to the ropes.

Yuta is sat on top for a heck of a back rake before being sent outside. That means another Danhausen/Moxley staredown, allowing Yuta to hit a big dive to the floor. Back in and Moxley grabs a cutter for two, because almost everyone has to use a cutter around here. Yuta gets in a quick Angle Slam and a top rope splash connects for two, but Moxley blasts him with a lariat. The Paradigm Shift finishes Yuta at 7:20.

Rating: C+. Yuta is one of the people around here who can have a good match with almost anyone and he got a fired up Moxley this week. That is not a bad place to be in and he looked good in defeat. Moxley is on to bigger and better things though, with Bryan Danielson looking pretty likely. Works for me, as did this opener.

Post match here is Bryan Danielson to stare Moxley down. Danielson asks who wants to see the two of them fight. He has been watching Moxley and knows that he was the best AEW World Champion. If Moxley had a little support, he would still be champion. Danielson understands that they shouldn’t be fighting, but rather fighting together.

There is no reason for some millennial cowboy to be World Champion. There is no reason why a dinosaur is a Tag Team Champion and there is no reason why someone best known for a vlog is TNT Champion. What if they took people like Daniel Garcia or Lee Moriarty or Wheeler Yuta under their wings to train the future together? Danielson says that even if the people don’t like him, they like what he is saying. Moxley can have some time to think about it because there are possibilities. This is intriguing and it could go more than one way, which is something AEW does well.

Video on CM Punk vs. MJF.

Here is Brandi Rhodes for a chat but before she gets very far, here is Dan Lambert to interrupt. He doesn’t think much of Brandi and her fake accent/the fake bulldogs down her shirt. Brandi says the only reason they hired him was to get to Josh Alexander, but his American Top Team guys aren’t doing so great. After Brandi waits through (and acknowledges) the unpleased cheers, she talks about how Lambert’s best fighters keep getting knocked out.

Maybe he should be spending more time with American Top Team. Lambert says Brandi’s whole family should turn heel, because the only face turn people want is her own job, which was turning face down. Brandi slaps him, so Lambert brings out Paige Van Zant for the big pull apart brawl. The argument was bad and I could have gone without Stephanie vs. Rousey lite.

The AHFO wants gold, with Isaiah Kassidy promising to take Sammy Guevara’s title and girl. Matt Hardy wants to know where Darby Allin is but Andrade thinks he wants more money.

Kings of the Black Throne vs. Penta El Zero Miedo/Pac

The chyron says Knights instead of Kings and Pac’s eyes are still bandaged. After he slides between Black’s legs to start, the blindfold comes off and it’s time for stereo dives to take out the Kings on the floor. We settle down to Penta chopping Black against the ropes and handing it back to Pac for some hard shots of his own.

We take a break and come back with Penta striking away at Black, who kicks him in the chest. Pac comes back in (with Tony saying it was a blind tag, which would have been a better line about five minutes ago) and gets taken down with a legsweep. Some sliding knees to the head give Black two and everything breaks down. Penta hits a step up flip dive onto King but gets shoves off the top. The mist sets to Penta sets up Dante’s Inferno for the pin at 10:23.

Rating: C+. Pac has a certain realism/aggressiveness to him that makes his matches fun to watch. They were laying it in here and the Kings winning was the only way to go. This seems to be setting up either Pac vs. Black in a huge showdown or the Kings vs. the Lucha Bros (or probably both), which works for everyone involved. I’m not sure how much Black needs someone at his side, but King is a good monster.

Adam Cole says Orange Cassidy didn’t beat him and his record is still intact (yay for legal loopholes). He’ll beat Evil Uno on Rampage and the world will know what he wants.

Nyla Rose vs. Ruby Soho

Vickie Guerrero is here with Rose. Ruby tries to start fast but walks into a Samoan drop for two. That means it’s time for Rose to start working on the arm as JR says it takes more energy to kick out for Soho than for Rose. Some more shots to the shoulder have Soho in trouble and we take a break.

Back with Soho getting planted back first onto the apron but the Beast Bomb is countered. The No Future (Riott Kick) gets two, with Vickie putting the foot on the ropes. Soho goes after Vickie but the distraction lets Rose hit a neckbreaker. Rose gets caught on top but blocks a super hurricanrana. The No Future misses completely and Rose hits a top rope Swanton to the back. The Beast Bomb finishes Soho at 10:48.

Rating: C. This was just a step above a squash as it’s time to reheat Rose. That’s something that has been done before, but the interesting thing here is Soho. She came in as the biggest female signing in a very long time and she hasn’t come close to breaking out. She has all of the tools, but this is the second company where she isn’t clicking. Maybe there was a reason that it didn’t work out so well in WWE?

The Gunn Club jumps Jungle Boy and takes him outside for a toss into the snow. Then they run off down the iced over road with Christian and Luchasaurus making the save.

Here is Hangman Page for a chat. He has a Texas Deathmatch with Lance Archer next week but he has a five month old at home throwing peas everywhere and there’s a foot of snow on the ground, so get Archer out here night now. Cue Dan Lambert, with Jake Roberts, to say he’s surprised Page didn’t stay in a city like Cleveland that canceled its Indians. Roberts wants the fight right now so Page goes after Lambert, only to have Archer come in from behind. A chokeslam onto the steps leaves Page laying and the Black Out puts him through a table. Simple and to the point beat down the champion before the title match segment

Chris Jericho doesn’t like Santana and Ortiz not tagging him in last week because it was embarrassing and disrespectful. Is it because of Eddie Kingston? They started AEW together so what influence does Kingston have? When it comes to AEW, Jericho is a bigger influencer than Kylie Jenner on Instagram, so he demands a full Inner Circle team meeting next week. Attendance is mandatory.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Maxwell Jacob Friedman vs. CM Punk

They have about forty minutes for this if needed and there is no Wardlow. MJF hides in the ropes to start so Punk starts punching away, giving us the teeter totter (for lack of a better term), with MJF eventually falling outside. They fight up into the crowd, with MJF getting crotched on a barricade, with Punk knocking him back to ringside. After some posing, they head back inside for the Scoop Slam Symphony. The threat of the top rope elbow has MJF rolling away so Punk misses a charge into the post instead. MJF gets in a few shots of his own and we take a break.

Back with MJF working on the shoulder but Punk forearms him off the top. A high crossbody puts MJF down and there’s a neckbreaker to drop him again. The running knee in the corner sets up the bulldog, with Punk saying it’s time to go to sleep. They head to the apron instead, with Punk slamming him outside instead.

A fan gets to chop MJF’s chest, but he’s fine enough to crotch Punk on top for a breather. MJF takes him down from the top by the arm for two of his own but Punk is back with the Pepsi Twist. The referee backs into the corner so the referee pulls Punk off, allowing MJF to choke away with some wrist tape. A sleeper has Punk in trouble….and he’s out at 14:41.

Hold on though as MJF celebrates but drops the tape, meaning we’re going to restart things. Punk unloads in the corner with about twenty right hands and an atomic drop (Excalibur: “Manhattan drop! JR: “Or an inverted atomic drop!”). MJF kicks him outside though and we take another break.

Back again with Punk hitting the clothesline but not being able to hit the GTS. The arm is snapped across the top rope but Punk scores with a suicide dive for a double knockdown on the floor. Back in and MJF scores with a stomp to the arm before busting out something like a Texas Cloverleaf Tequila Sunrise. That’s reversed into an STF but Punk has to let go due to the arm. The GTS doesn’t work either due to the knee so MJF goes with the ankle lock. That’s reversed as well and they strike it out until Punk busts out a poisonrana.

They’re both down for a bit until MJF goes after the arm, setting up Made In Japan of all things for two. MJF sends him hard into the corner for two more and we take another break. Back again with Punk getting two off a rollup and hitting his leg lariat. MJF bites his fingers and face but Punk catches him on top with the Pepsi Plunge of all things.

Neither can hit a Tombstone so Punk kicks him in the face and, slowly, hits the top rope elbow for two. Punk knocks him outside….and here is Wardlow. He steps over MJF and goes face to face with Punk before stepping side without getting physical. Punk limps over to MJF and throws him inside but the distraction lets MJF hit Punk with the ring for the pin at 39:36.

Rating: A-. This was one of the better TV matches you’ll see in a long time and the nearly forty minutes flew by. MJF winning was always a possibility and Punk has a reason for a ticked off rematch. The important thing for now though is MJF has a path to the World Title shot at Double or Nothing, which is where he belongs, assuming the Punk stuff is wrapped up. MJF continues to be able to bring it in the big matches and this is the biggest win of his career.

Post match a replay shows Wardlow passing MJF the ring (which we couldn’t see due to the closeup on Punk/Wardlow). MJF sits down ala the Pipe Bomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. The show was centered around one match and that took up about a third of the night at a very high level. Other than that, stories were advanced and we had some good matches, making this a pretty easy success. AEW knows how to do things when they are focused and that was back tonight. Good show, with a main event that was both great and flew by, which you don’t get very often.

Results
Jon Moxley b. Wheeler Yuta – Paradigm Shift
Kings of the Black Throne b. Pac/Penta El Cero Miedo – Dante’s Inferno to Penta
Nyla Rose b. Ruby Soho – Beast Bomb
Maxwell Jacob Friedman b. CM Punk – Ring to the head

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Dynamite
Date: January 26, 2022
Location: Wolstein Center, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Excalibur, Tony Schiavone

It’s time for Beach Break, which is in Cleveland because when you think of going to the beach, you think of a place that is currently 12 degrees and on a lake. This week’s show is stacked, with a ladder match for the TNT Title and a Lights Out match where Orange Cassidy can beat Adam Cole but it doesn’t count. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

TNT Title: Cody Rhodes vs. Sammy Guevara

Ladder match for the undisputed title. Cody starts fast with a dropkick and goes for the drop town uppercut, only to get blocked. The technical wrestling (which defines ladder matches) ensues until they head outside with Cody grabbing the ladder. That’s broken up so they head into the crowd (with Cody having to check on a fan he bumps into). Cody wins a slugout but stops to high five the fans, allowing Sammy to dive over the barricade with a cutter.

Back in and Sammy loads up the ladder but Cody is fine enough to break that up without much trouble. The collision knocks both of them down and they slowly climb, with Cody hitting a scary delayed vertical suplex off the ladder (with the referee holding it in place). We take a break and come back with Cody dropping Sammy ribs first on an upside down ladder. Cody grabs a Figure Four with Sammy’s legs tied in the rungs of a ladder but lets go pretty soon.

Sammy fights back and kicks away but his springboard is cut off with a ladder to the face. That lets Cody go up, but Sammy hits a springboard (off the top of another ladder) into a super cutter to send them both crashing down. It’s Sammy going up again but Cody shoves the ladder over, sending Sammy crashing into the rope. Somehow Sammy is back up so it’s Cross Rhodes to bring him back down, almost sending the ladder into the referee.

They both go up but wind up hanging onto the bar the belts are attached to. That means a double crash and they both roll outside for a breather. Cody ties the leg in the ladder but here is Fuego Del Sol to beg for some mercy. That earns him a Jay Driller inside but Sammy is back up with a save and the GTH on the floor. Sammy adds a big flip dive to the floor to take Cody down again.

Cody is laid over a ladder bridged between the ring and the barricade, allowing Sammy to climb the BIG ladder (not inside under the title, because that would make too much sense). The Swanton hits Cody, with the ladder not giving whatsoever. They’re both down and then slowly go up, with Sammy hitting him in the head with one of the belts for the big knockdown. Sammy pulls down the titles to win at 22:07.

Rating: B. This was the definition of a spotfest, with a bunch of the moves not making sense as they could have gone for the title. That being said, SWEET GOODNESS there were some amazing spots here, with that cutter being one of the cooler things I have seen in one of these in a long time. This was awesome, turn your brain off stuff and Sammy winning was a nice treat.

Earlier today, Team Taz had Tony Schiavone come to the freezing beach in Cleveland. They want to take out Dante Martin and Jay Lethal, but Tony thinks his hand has frozen to the microphone.

Wardlow vs. Elijah Dean/James Alexander

Wardlow is the hometown boy and it’s the Powerbomb Symphony for the double stack pin at 1:17.

Inner Circle vs. 2.0/Daniel Garcia

Santana and Ortiz/Chris Jericho here with the former two beating on Parker, including a splash for two. Garcia comes in and gets kicked down as well, though there is not even a look at Jericho for a tag. Jericho tags himself in out of frustration but Santana tags himself right back in.

The argument is on and the Inner Circle gets jumped as we take a break. Back with Oritz fighting out of trouble and ignoring Jericho’s hand to tag in Santana. Everything breaks down and Jericho looks on from the floor. Jericho pulls Lee outside though, followed by a Judas Effect through the ropes to Parker. Santana piledrives Parker for the pin at 8:44.

Rating: C. There wasn’t much drama in this outside of Jericho screwing over his partners, but they were a bit heavy handed with Santana and Ortiz not trusting him. The split still seems imminent and after the Inner Circle has been a thing for so long, that is not a bad idea. Jericho could use his latest freshening up and Santana and Ortiz will be fine on their own so the breakup wouldn’t be awful.

Video on Hangman Page vs. Lance Archer, which will be a Texas Deathmatch. Page, upon hearing that, has his eyes bug out as he asks “a WHAT?” in a funny bit.

We get a showdown between Jurassic Express and Private Party, with Christian Cage and Matt Hardy. Matt hypes up the team but Jungle Boy points out that Party’s watches are fake.

Here is CM Punk for a chat. He is trying to look tough tonight but Cleveland makes him smile. Everyone knows who Punk wants to fight and he wants the fans chanting for MJF so it can happen for the only time ever. Punk opens the jacket to reveal the scarf, and apparently you can get a 12 pack on Amazon for $5. He has beaten everyone MJF has so bring him out here.

Cue MJF to ask the fans if they want to see them wrestle right here right no. MJF: “No.” They can do the match next week in Chicago, with MJF finally saying he’ll have the match. MJF says he’ll beat him in Chicago (Punk: “Do it here b****, do it here.”) and talks about Punk walking out in Cleveland about eight years ago. All Punk is going to do is walk out and then talk about it on a podcast.

Punk says MJF will be listening because he is a fan. Leaving was the best thing he ever did and now being back is the best thing he ever did. Punk wants MJF to go put in his three inch lifts and come out here to fight. These people love him because he keeps getting up and fights, just like Cleveland and Chicago.

MJF wants to test that theory, so here is the rest of the Pinnacle, including Shawn Spears coming in from behind. The big beatdown is on, but Wardlow stands back and doesn’t get involved. MJF tells Wardlow to powerbomb Punk and, after thinking about it, Wardlow does so, albeit without much force. MJF sits on Punk’s chest ala the Pipebomb to wrap it up. That was awesome, and it’s time for Punk to finally crush him, possibly with Wardlow turning.

The Acclaimed doesn’t like Jon Moxley and promise that Anthony Bowens will beat his “Oskar Kokoshka looking a**.” I did not have a Hey Arnold reference on this show.

Mark Sterling interrupts a Varsity Blonds interview and gives Julia Hart the next TBS Title shot against Jade Cargill. Griff Garrison says she needs time to heal properly but she cuts him off, saying she can fight her own battles.

Leylah Hirsch vs. Red Velvet

Hirsch pulls her down to the floor for a whip into the barricade and grabs a suplex as we take a break. Back with Velvet hitting the running knees to the back but favoring her shoulder. Hirsch hits a suplex and grabs the Legit Lock, sending Velvet over to the rope. Back up and Velvet tries a rollup, only to get reversed into a cradle with Hirsch grabbing trunks for the pin at 8:13.

Rating: D+. This was WAY too long as there is no reason to believe Velvet would hang with Hirsch that long. On top of that, it wasn’t even a clean finish, which shouldn’t be the case for Hirsch against someone on Velvet’s level. The match wasn’t even very good, which makes this one of the bigger headscratchers they’ve had in awhile around here.

Post match the beating stays on but Kris Statlander makes the save.

The House of Black threatens Pac because they are inevitable.

Here is Tony Schiavone to introduce Britt Baker, who won a bunch of Pro Wrestling Illustrated Awards. She talks about how the Steelers beat the Browns and lists off a bunch of Baker Mayfield’s failures. Then she does it again before saying she is the Baker you can count on. This was oddly repetitive.

Vickie Guerrero brings out Nyla Rose, who rants about how Ruby Soho cost her the TBS Title. A challenge is thrown out.

Adam Cole vs. Orange Cassidy

Unsanctioned lights out. Cassidy takes the glasses off and crushes them, setting up the big brawl. The fight to the floor with Cole being sent into the barricade. Cole is back with a shot of his own, sending Cassidy down in a heap. It’s time to get a chair….and Cole pulls Danhausen out with him. Danhausen seems to curse him before leaving, but Cole is fine enough to superkick a chair into Cassidy’s face. Cassidy’s Orange Punch hits post to damage his hand though and we take a break.

Back with Cassidy hitting a Michinoku Driver on the open chairs. Cue a bunch of people to brawl at ringside, leaving Cassidy to hit the Orange Punch. It hurts the band hand though and it’s Cole hitting him low….only to find out that Cassidy is wearing a cup with thumbtacks attached. Cassidy hits his own Panama Sunrise for two and it’s time to fight to the back. After running Jerry Lynn off, it’s an AA to send Cassidy through a table for two.

They go back to the stage where Cole blocks an Orange Punch with a light to knock Cassidy silly. Cole climbs the set but Cassidy gets away and climbs up after him. A low blow cuts Cole down and he gives Cole a hug, setting up a dive through the stage. Cassidy lands on top and wins at 17:00.

Rating: C+.I’ve had to sit here for a bit and let this one soak in. On one hand, Cassidy winning makes sense based on the story they have been telling. On the other hand, it’s still Orange Cassidy, the guy who does the lazy kicks and the thumbs up, beating Adam Cole. This isn’t going to kill Cole and he’s not dead, but this is a case where it’s ok for Cassidy to fight hard and then lose in the end. The “but it doesn’t count!” deal will be the defense for it, but ultimately, Cassidy pinned Cole and that’s a bit much to swallow.

Overall Rating: B. This was a huge improvement over last week, which gives me some very solid hope that last week was just a misstep. The opener and main event were both good brawls, though the main event result still doesn’t quite sit right. It was a better show than last week, but there is still a little something missing from these shows. I’m not sure what it is, but the spark isn’t as bright as it was for a long time.

Results
Sammy Guevara b. Cody Rhodes – Guevara pulled down the titles
Wardlow b. Elijah Dean/James Alexander – Double pin
Inner Circle b. 2.0/Daniel Garcia – Piledriver to Parker
Leylah Hirsch b. Red Velvet – Rollup with trunks
Orange Cassidy b. Adam Cole – Slam through the stage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: August 21, 2007
Location: Colonial Center, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Summerslam and the one ECW match is set. Granted you might not have known that based on last week’s show, as you might think that we’re coming up on Boogeyman vs. Big Daddy V as the show’s big match. The build has been a bit weird in recent weeks, but that is mainly due to the match being set up so far in advance. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence, featuring a slower version of Don’t Question My Heart.

Armando Estrada is in the ring with a bunch of weapons around him. He declares himself the Hardcore Dictator and introduces our first match.

Big Daddy V vs. Tommy Dreamer

Extreme Rules and Matt Striker is here with V. Dreamer slugs away to start and tries a slam for reasons of general stupidity. V chairs him in the back and shows Dreamer how to do a slam. There’s a whip into a shopping card in the corner but Dreamer avoids a charge. The table is loaded up but a Striker distraction lets V run Dreamer over again. Back in and Dreamer’s trashcan shots to the head have no effect, as V Samoan drops him through a table for the fast pin. Pretty much the squash it needed to be.

Video on CM Punk.

Vince McMahon and Jonathan Coachman are here as Vince continues to search for his son. Coach thinks that the son might be the result of an encounter Vince had in a bathroom stall (Vince: “HOW DID YOU FIND OUT ABOUT THAT???”) so here is Balls Mahoney. Vince wants this….thing out of his sight. Arguing ensues with the punchline of Vince shouting that he has no balls. Coach: “I know you have grapefruits….” Vince: “SHUT UP!”

Elijah Burke vs. Balls Mahoney

Burke grabs a headlock to start as commentary talks about Mahoney’s interactions with Vince and Kelly Kelly because he’s quite the man about town as of late. Mahoney is back with a shoulder and chop, leaving Tazz thinking Burke needs some sanitizer. They actually go technical with some arm work as Joey talks about Mahoney being barred from amateur wrestling in New Jersey (because that is the only Balls Mahoney story ever). Tazz: “Yeah I’ve heard that one before.”

Some kicks slow Mahoney down and a few uppercuts make it even worse. Burke sends him shoulder first into the post and the leg is wrapped around it too. There’s the handstand elbow in the corner (that always looks cool) and Burke grabs an armbar. The frustration starts setting in so Burke bites the arm, which can’t be very sanitary. More arm pulling sets up a slam before they both miss an elbow. An STO works a bit better for Burke but Mahoney is back up with the right hands. The sitout spinebuster gets two and Burke misses a splash in the corner, allowing Mahoney to get a sloppy rollup for the upset pin.

Rating: C-. This went on longer than it needed to as the pretty surprising mini Mahoney push continues. Burke has long since stopped being a thing around here so this isn’t some soul crushing loss, but you would think there would be a little something better for him to do. The fans like Mahoney though so this isn’t the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen.

Video on John Morrison, including a lot of his weird sayings.

HHH is back at Summerslam.

Post break Balls Mahoney runs into Miz and Extreme Expose. Miz mocks Mahoney and leaves with the women, though Kelly Kelly does not seem pleased. Some winking ensues between Kelly and Mahoney.

We look back at Kevin Thorn beating Stevie Richards last week but beating him up after the bell for the reversed decision.

Thorn is in the back when Richards jumps him. Referees break it up.

Summerslam rundown.

Vince McMahon and Coach don’t think tonight has been a success, though Coach thinks he might have an idea. CM Punk comes in, and while Vince thinks he is talented, he can’t get behind the straightedge stuff. Punk says he doesn’t have dirty unprotected sex with some skank who files a paternity suit against him, making him a living breathing, national disgrace. Vince is not impressed.

CM Punk/Boogeyman vs. Miz/John Morrison

This is Miz and Morrison’s first traditional tag match together (at least on TV). Extreme Expose is here with Miz to uneven things up a bit. Punk kicks away at Miz to start and hands it off to Boogeyman, who scares the girls a lot. We take a break and come back with Morrison flipping over Punk and getting kicked in the face for his efforts. Boogeyman comes in to show Punk how to properly gyrate before pulling him out of the corner, making Morrison flip backwards.

Punk adds a kick to the head but Morrison gets in a cheap shot to knock him off the corner. Back in and Miz hammers away with the left hands, setting up Morrison’s neck crank. A backbreaker/neckbreaker combination gets two on Punk and Miz grabs the chinlock. Morrison gets two off a slingshot elbow and he rains down some right hands.

Another neckbreaker gets another two and the second chinlock doesn’t last very long. Morrison loads up a superplex but gets sunset bombed back down, allowing Punk to strike away. Punk hits a big dive to take Morrison down on the floor as Boogeyman is sent into the steps. Back in and a catapult sends Miz into the corner. There’s the GTS to Miz but Morrison makes a blind tag and hits the flipping neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: C. I wonder if something happened to Boogeyman there as he just kind of vanished near the end and never even got a tag back in. Morrison getting the pin on Punk is a little surprising but it adds a bit of drama to Sunday’s match. Miz and Morrison do work well together though, which is the kind of thing that can go a long (or really long) way. Not a great match, but it kept Punk vs. Morrison warm for Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C. They can’t get to Summerslam fast enough as this show was out of gas by the end. It doesn’t help when one story is worthy of the pay per view and they have already fought three or four times. The show wasn’t bad, but it’s another skippable week. That has been the case more than once as of late and they really need to do something to make it better soon.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Royal Rumble 2013
Date: January 27, 2013
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Attendance: 13,00
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This show was only a year ago and I can barely remember anything about it. Aside from the Rumble the big matches are the Rock challenging CM Punk for the WWE Title in the most obvious ending ever and Alberto Del Rio defending his newly won World Heavyweight Championship against Big Show in a last man standing match. Other than that we’ve only got HELL NO vs. the Rhodes Scholars to complete the card. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: The Miz vs. Antonio Cesaro

Cesaro is defending. This is just after Flair passed the Figure Four to Miz, starting the worst period of his career. Miz grabs a headlock to start and gets two off an elbow to the jaw. The headlock takes Cesaro down to the mat but he fights up and grabs one of his own. Back up and Miz tries a leapfrog but gets caught in midair with a tikt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. The champion takes over and cranks on both of Miz’s arms before getting two off a Michinoku Driver.

A hard European uppercut sets up the gutwrench suplex for two and it’s back to the double arm. Back up again and Miz slips out of a slam and hooks the Reality Check for two. There’s the running clothesline in the corner and Miz goes up but hurts his knee on the top rope ax handle. Cesaro gets caught with his feet on the ropes, allowing Miz to get two off a rollup. Antonio misses a running knee in the corner but is still able to roll away from the Figure Four. Cesar takes him to the floor and rams Miz into the metal underneath the ring. Miz is out cold so Cesaro Neutralizes him for the pin to retain.

Rating: D+. Miz just doesn’t work in a lot of these matches and the Figure Four doesn’t work in the slightest. Thankfully he wouldn’t be featured very prominently for awhile as there was just nothing to him for the most part. Cesaro still needs to get a push as he’s more talented and marketable than half the roster but instead we get people like Miz.

The opening video is about time passing and how no one has enough. This ties into Punk’s time as champion with Rock saying the reign ends tonight.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Alberto Del Rio

Last man standing match, which is a rematch with the same stipulations from when Alberto won the title a few weeks ago. Del Rio turned the announce table on top of Big Show so Big Show turned it on top of him a few weeks later. Alberto is shown in the back and he runs into Bret Hart for no apparent reason whatsoever. Bret says Alberto reminds him of a Mexican version of himself. Alberto calls Bret a Canadian Del Rio and Ricardo gushes, earning him Bret’s sunglasses. What a bizarre cameo.

Some hard chops have Del Rio in early trouble and a slam gets a five count. Alberto chops away but jumps off the middle rope right into a chop to change control right back. The champion dropkicks the giant’s knee out but the low superkick actually knocks Big Show up from his knees to his feet. A hurricanrana and a seated senton put Big Show down and Alberto gets a breather. It’s amazing how much more intersting Del Rio is by doing this lucha stuff instead of his arm work. The arm stuff is good but this is such a nice change of pace.

Big Show blocks the armbreaker with one arm and slams Del Rio down, sending him outside. Del Rio gets back in as Big Show gets a chair but the champion dropkicks him in the ribs to knock it out of his hands. A series of chair shots (crowd: “SI! SI! SI!”) has Big Show down but Alberto dives into a chokeslam for an eight count. We head outside again with Del Rio getting chopped to the floor with ease. This is a very slow paced match so far.

A pair of low blows puts Big Show down in the aisle but he’s up at nine. Show hits something resembling a DDT on the floor before sending Del Rio into the set. He rips a piece of the set, resembling a light tube, and blasts Del Rio over the back. Since this is WWE there’s a table readily available and Big Show takes the champion on top of the set for a chokeslam through the table. The bump looked awesome but he’s again on his feet at nine.

The beating takes Del Rio back to the ring and Show loads up the WMD. Alberto sees it coming and rolls outside, only to have Big Show throw Ricardo around for fun. Big Show misses a charge through the barricade (clearly heavily padded) for five but a long series of chair shots has him down again. Del Rio crushes the arm between the steps and a chair, but Alberto follows up with a fire extinguisher blast to the face for no apparent reason. Back in and the armbreaker goes on, but Ricardo ups the ante by duct taping Big Show’s legs to the ropes. The giant can’t get up and Alberto retains the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but it was very slowly paced and the ending made Del Rio look more clever than tough. It also doesn’t help that the match was the same gimmick they did less than a month ago. Face Alberto was a nice guy but they cut the cord just six months after this. Not bad, but Del Rio winning the title here would have been much better.

Send Slim Jims to the military!

Ziggler isn’t worried about being in the Rumble and AJ threatens Matt Striker with Big E. Langston for implying Ziggler can’t win. Langston does one of the most mind blowing imitations of an annoying reporter while asking Ziggler for his thoughts on the main event. Dolph has little of note to say but no one was hearing him after Big E.’s bit anyway.

Cesaro says he’ll continue the streak of non-Americans winning the Rumble.

The Prime Time Players……WE’RE GETTING RUMBLE PROMOS!!!! Anyway they say anyone that thinks they’ll eliminate either of them is getting a penalty flag.

Orton says he’s perfect for the Rumble because it’s every man for himself.

Cena is ready for the Rumble because it means he can be champion again.

Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett says he’ll restore credability to the Rumble.

Sheamus says he won the Rumble last year and he’ll do it again tonight.

Ryback isn’t any catchphrase and he doesn’t eat Fruity Pebbles, but he’ll see food every 90 seconds. Feed him more.

We recap Miz vs. Cesaro on the pre-show.

Tag Titles: HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

The Scholars are challenging. Cody kicks Bryan in the ribs as Cole references Queen lyrics. Bryan spins out of a wristlock and the fans chant for Cody’s mustache. Cody’s leapfrog is countered into a surfboard and it’s off to Kane for a low dropkick and a two count. Rhodes scores with a dropkick of his own and drives Kane into the corner for the tag off to Sandow. Kane easily powers Sandow into the corner because, you know, he’s Damien Sandow and it’s off to Bryan for the YES Kicks.

JBL rants about Cole and Lawler hugging as Kane kicks Sandow in the face, knocking him out to the floor. The FLYING GOAT takes out the challengers but Cody low bridges Bryan to the floor to take over. Back in and a half crab has Daniel in trouble but he reverses into a small package to escape. Damien comes in again and drops an elbow for two before dropping the Wind-Up Elbow.

After some knees to the back it’s Cody in again but he charges into a boot in the corner. Sandow breaks up a hot tag attempt and Cody puts Bryan in an over the shoulder backbreaker. Daniel slides down to escape and makes the tag to Kane. Sandow is tossed around like a rag doll but a Cody distraction prevents the top rope clothesline. Kane grabs both guys by the throat and Bryan tags himself in. The Scholars double suplex Kane but Bryan shoves Cody into a chokeslam and Daniel YES Locks Sandow to retain.

Rating: C. Nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw around this time which means it was fine. The Scholars were a nice idea for a team but it was clear that they had no chance at this point given how low their individual stocks were. Kane and Bryan gelled perfectly well as a team and Bryan would get far bigger very soon.

Rumble By The Numbers which I’ve typed many times already.

HELL NO celebrates in the back when Vickie Guerrero comes up and gives them their Rumble numbers. Daniel shows Kane his but Kane won’t show Bryan. This leads to penis jokes.

We look at the Royal Rumble Fan Fest which is another name for Axxess. This included a tournament of NXT wrestlers for a spot in the Rumble, won by Bo Dallas.

Royal Rumble

Ziggler is #1 which he picked (the other option was #2) after winning a Beat the Clock Challenge on Raw. Dolph says he’ll win and doesn’t care who he faces first, bringing out a returning Chris Jericho at #2. This was a complete shock and the roof is blown off the building. Also remember that Ziggler beat Jericho to send him out of the company to give us some history. The clock is at 90 seconds between entrants this year.

Jericho is quickly sent to the apron but comes back with a top rope ax handle. Now it’s Dolph on the apron as the fans tell Jericho he still has it. When did Jericho ever come close to losing it? A superplex brings Ziggler back into the ring and Cody Rhodes is in at #3. Jericho hammers away on him but Ziggler gets in a cheap shot as the double teaming begins. Chris knocks Ziggler down and puts Cody in the Walls but Dolph makes the save.

Dolph catapults Jericho throat first into the bottom rope as Kofi Kingston is in at #4. Kofi immediately speeds things up and pounds away on Cody but can’t hit Ziggy with Trouble in Paradise. Ziggler is thrown to the apron and all four guys try to eliminate each other at the same time in the same spot. Santino Marella is #5 and he sends all four to the apron before loading up the Cobra. Everybody is back in and even though Santino takes Kofi down with the sock, it’s Cody backdropping Marella out.

Drew McIntyre of 3MB is #6 and gets to fight Kofi as everyone else takes a breather. Back up and it’s time to lay on the ropes while trying to eliminate people. Jericho is sent over the ropes but he keeps his feet off the ground and gets back in. Titus O’Neil is in at #7 to add some power, including taking Cody and Kofi down with a double clothesline. Cole finally tells us that the bark is a shout out to his fraternity from Florida. Thank you for explaining that to us after two years.

Jericho throws out McIntyre but can’t do the same to Ziggler as Goldust is #8. Cody gets ready for the showdown and the fans are WAY into this. They trade the kneeling uppercuts and Goldie stomps on Cody for a bit. The fans chant for Goldust and it’s David Otunga (remember him?) is in at #9. The announcers ignore the match to talk about the commentators being in the Rumble last year as people start to pair off.

Nothing much happens until Heath Slater is in at #10. That gives us Ziggler, Jericho, Rhodes, Kingston, O’Neil, Goldust, Otunga and Slater at the moment. Slater fires off right hands to Kofi as Jericho calls spots to Ziggler. Dolph gets stuck on the apron again and Sheamus is #11 to clear out some bodies. He destroys everyone with his usual stuff before sending Titus to the apron for the ten forearms. Otunga is thrown onto Titus to get rid of O’Neil before ten forearms and a Brogue Kick get rid of the lawyer. Tensai, still the Japanese lunkhead, is #12.

Everybody goes after Tensai to make a big cluster in the corner. That goes nowhere at all so Brodus Clay comes in at #13. We get a Tons of Funk preview before Goldust backdrops Cody to the apron, only to get pulled to the apron as well. Cody gets back in and sends Goldust into the post for the elimination and a lot of booing. Rey Mysterio is #14 to make the crowd happy again. Ziggler and Jericho get quick 619s and the top rope splash crushes Jericho. Things slow down a bit until we reach the halfway point with Darren Young at #15.

A bunch of guys join forces to dump Brodus and Kofi puts out Tensai a few seconds later. Now we get to the part that everybody was waiting on as Kofi is knocked off the apron, only to land on Tensai’s back. He jumps onto the announcers’ table as he tries to figure this out. Why he doesn’t just jump two feet to get onto the steps is beyond me. Bo Dallas is #16 as this is going on. Instead of the steps, Kofi gets JBL’s office chair and pogos his way back to the ring. Kingston pulls Darren out of the ring but gets caught with the Disaster Kick for the elimination before he can get back inside.

Godfather gives us the nostalgia pop at #17 and is dropkicked out by Ziggler four seconds later. He seems ok with that and leaves with his women. The whole point was the entrance anyway so I have no issue with that. Wade Barrett is in at #18 as the ring is getting too full. Everything slows down again and John Cena is #19 to clear out some tired people. Everybody gets ready for him so Cena comes a charging. John fights them all off and throws out Slater and Cody but can’t dump Jericho.

Damien Sandow is #20, giving us Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Mysterio, Dallas, Barrett, Cena and Sandow. Mysteiro and Barrett fight to the apron and a big forearm puts Rey out. Sheamus goes right after Wade as Jericho tries to put Cena in the Walls. Daniel Bryan is #21 and fires off kicks to Sandow. Now it’s Barrett getting the kicks as everyone else is down. Sheamus and Bryan try to put Jericho out but he slides back in under the ropes.

Antonio Cesaro is in at #22 and gets in a fight with Sheamus as the fans start the dueling Cena chants. Everybody is back up now and Great Khali is #23. It’s chops all around until things calm a bit. Kane comes in at #24 to fire things up again (get it?) but the ring is too full. It gets even worse with Zach Ryder coming in at #25 but HELL NO dumps Khali. Bryan dumps Kane but Cesaro dumps Bryan into Kane’s arms. Daniel: YES! Kane shouts no and drops Bryan for the elimination in a funny bit.

Randy Orton is #26 and it’s powerslams all around. Ziggler and Dallas get a double Elevated DDT and it’s an RKO for Ryder, followed by the elimination. Jinder Mahal gets lucky #27 as Cesaro lifts Cena up, only to be eliminated himself. Ziggler gets launched to the ropes but slides back in as Miz is #28. He gets in a fight with Cesaro in the aisle and limps into the ring to sell the ankle injury from earlier. Sheamus dumps Mahal and Sin Cara is #29.

Cara tries an enziguri on Ziggler which misses by four inches but Ziggler sells it anyway. Bo Dallas pulls Barrett out in an elimination that should have led further than it did. Miz sends Jericho to the apron as Barrett pulls Dallas out from the floor. Ryback is #30 to give us a final grouping of Ryback, Ziggler, Jericho, Sheamus, Cena, Sandow, Orton, Miz and Sin Cara. Damien is out first and Sin Cara quickly follows. Miz tries to power Ryback out and is tossed as well to get us down to six. Jericho is somehow still alive and hits a Lionsault on Cena but the springboard dropkick doesn’t eliminate Sheamus.

Ziggler backdrops Jericho to the apron and superkicks him out (missed as well but he’s spent at this point) but walks into an RKO. There’s one for Cena as well and Sheamus gets the third. That leaves Ryback to fight Orton but the monster gets taken down with an Elevated DDT. Ryback fights off the RKO and clotheslines Randy out to get us down to four. Ziggler DDTs Cena down but a Brogue Kick puts Dolph on the floor.

It’s Sheamus, Ryback and Cena with Ryback getting double suplexed down. Cena and Sheamus make things serious by LOOKING AT THE SIGN. John takes over but Ryback runs him over with a clothesline. Sheamus escapes the Shell Shock, looks at the sign, and hits White Noise on Ryback. The Brogue Kick is countered with a backdrop to eliminate Sheamus and we’re down to two.

They LOOK AT THE SIGN and do their signature taunts before Ryback spinebusters Cena down. The Meathook is countered into the STF and Ryback passes out, leaving him as dead weight. Ryback fights out of the corner and Cena’s head into the mat. He loads up a powerslam but Cena slips out the back and shoves Ryback out for the win and title shot at Wrestlemania.

Rating: B. It’s a good but not great Rumble. That being said, there was almost no other option to win here, even though it set up the rematch that no one wanted to see. There’s certainly some good stuff in it and there were no down spots, but you would expect more big moments than we got here.

Coming Home ad for Wrestlemania. That still should have been Wrestlemania XXX.

We recap CM Punk vs. The Rock. It’s a basic story: Punk has been champion for 434 days and Rock is getting a title shot because he’s the Rock, which was kind of a lame reason, especially when the shot was announced six months ago. That began a countdown that made everything Punk did meaningless, because there was no way it would be anyone but Rock taking the belt from him here. Yeah Punk got in some shots on Rock before the match, but this was as much of a layup as you could get. Also if Shield or anyone interferes, Punk is stripped of the title.

Rock, after waiting for them to chant his name, says he isn’t worried about Shield, even though they busted up his lung recently. He goes on a rant about how many hard things he’s been through, but redeems himself a bit by talking about his mom getting cancer but beating it to be here tonight. Punk has said that the people don’t count but Rock says every single one of them count to him. He reaches his hand out to everyone that believes in the Rock so he can get their power, if you smell what he’s cooking.

Raw World Title: The Rock vs. CM Punk

Punk of course has Heyman with him. He charges right into the brawl and actually pounds Rock down into the corner. A quick Rock Bottom is countered but Punk is sent outside. Rock follows him outside and sends the champion into the barricade before loading up the announce table. Punk comes back with a shot to the ribs and puts the table back together in a great bit. Back in and Rock scores with more right hands to knock Punk to the floor again.

Punk is whipped into the barricade one more time but he gets a boot up to stop a charging Bull. He finishes fixing the announce table instead of following up on Rock before dropping Rock ribs first on the barricade. They head inside again for a body vice from CM followed by a knee to the ribs for two. Off to a freaky looking hold where Punk pins Rock’s shoulders down but pulls back on his head to crank on the shoulders and back.

More choking follows and a knee to the back has Rock on the apron, followed by a springboard dropkick to send him outside. Punk tries a top rope ax handle to take Rock down but injures his knee in the process. Rock scores with some kicks to the knee but the champion easily sends him out to the floor to stop the comeback. Back in and Punk misses the springboard clothesline and reinjures the knee, giving Rock his opening.

A DDT gets one on Punk but he fights out of the Rock Bottom. The GTS is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but Punk counters into the Anaconda Vice in a nice sequence. Rock rolls over into a cradle, forcing Punk to let go of the hold. Back up and tries the Rock Bottom but Punk counters into a rollup for two, only to be countered into a low seated Sharpshooter. Punk is next to the rope so naturally he takes thirty seconds to get the break.

Rock takes him to the floor and loads up the announce table again. They fight on top but Rock counters a GTS attempt into what was supposed to be a Rock Bottom but was really more like the table collapsing with Rock’s arm around Punk’s chest. Rock comes up holding his knee and both guys make it back in at an eight count. Punk scores with a high kick but both guys are down.

Back up and Rock wins a slugout before scoring with the spinebuster. He loads up the People’s Elbow and there go the lights. Cole can see Shield pulling Rock to the floor and powerbombing him through the table. The lights come back up and Rock is laid out as the referee has no idea what’s going on. The announcers try to tell Mike Chioda what happened and Punk feigns innocence.

He throws Rock back in for the pin and celebrates but here’s Vince to say Punk is stripped of the title for the interference. Rock says no and to restart the match. The bell rings again and Punk stomps away as JBL threatens to put Cole through a table for playing cheerleader. The Macho Elbow gets two but the GTS is countered into a spinebuster, setting up the People’s Elbow to end Punk’s reign.

Rating: B. It’s another good match but it felt like they were dancing around for twenty three minutes before we got to the obvious ending. The Shield stuff was a decent fake out but it really didn’t need to be there. Rock winning was obvious though and that really put a ceiling on how high this was going to get.

Rock celebrates for about three minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Yeah it’s a good show overall, but the major problem is obvious: there was no other possibly ending other than Rock vs. Cena at Wrestlemania 29 and almost everyone knew it. The show is definitely entetaining and actually really good at times, but it was so telegraphed up and down the card that it offers almost no excitement at all, even on the initial viewing. Still though, worth checking out if you have nothing else to do.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. The Miz

Original: C-
Redo: D+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show

Original: B
Redo: C-

HELL NO vs. Rhodes Scholars

Original: C
Redo: C

Royal Rumble

Original: C+
Redo: B

The Rock vs. CM Punk

Original: B
Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A-
Redo: B

That original overall rating is too high for what I gave everything else. Also I think the original last man standing match rating is closer to the accurate one. It just didn’t hold up as well on a second viewing, but it was good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Saturday Night’s Main Event #35
Date: August 18, 2007
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 16,827
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross

It’s time for the annual hour and a half long commercial for Summerslam which makes you want to watch the original run of this series again. This show has nothing advertised outside of an update on who Vince McMahon’s illegitimate child might be. The show doesn’t make a difference anyway but I’m almost worried about what is going to be on here. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon and Coach are in the back to recap the illegitimate child deal. Coach has been looking through the roster and thinks he has an idea of who Vince’s child is. Vince has told him about all of his dalliances (which he just has records of I guess), except for this one in Kansas City (where Coach is from), back in the 70s….when Coach was born…..and then put up for adoption. Vince thinks this is going to be a long night.

Opening sequence.

Batista/Kane vs. Great Khali/Finlay

Take two Summerslam matches, put them in a tag match. Finlay and Kane, with his taped up ribs, start things off, with Kane knocking him into the corner. It’s quickly off to Batista, who takes Finlay down by the arm. A MuscleBuster drops Finlay again and we take a break. Back with Khali working on the ribs and putting on the stomach Claw.

Kane fights up but gets kicked in the face to put him right back down. That doesn’t last long though as Finlay gets over for the tag off to Batista as everything breaks down. Khali gets tied in the ropes so here is Hornswoggle…who is launched into Khali’s chest. A double chokeslam puts Khali down and the Batista Bomb finishes Finlay.

Rating: C. Total house show style main event and that’s about as good as you’re going to get. Ultimately, the wrestling isn’t so much the point of this show as much as just seeing these wrestlers doing something to get you ready for Summerslam. They didn’t have another option for the ending either so this was about as good as it could have been done.

Vince McMahon has to know who his kid is….and then he looks in a mirror to turn him into his 80s version. Coach gets Vince out of there so Ron Simmons comes up and catchphrases at his own reflection.

MVP is very happy to see Evander Holyfield here to beat Matt Hardy in a boxing match. Holyfield does seem to know him.

Here are Coach and Vince McMahon for Illegitimate Child Corner. Since DNA tests have taken so long, it is time to find out who the child is. Coach talks about how Vince is man with urges but Vince tells him to GET ON WITH THIS. First up, Vince had a tryst in Kentucky, which brings out Eugene. Vince says that’s not possible, because he slept with a woman, not his cousin. Eugene says his Uncle Eric wanted to get into wrestling because Vince nailed his sister….and that’s enough for Vince to cut him off. Eugene: “I LOVE YOU DAD!”

Vince throws him out so Coach brings in Melina, who might have been conceived when Vince was at a Wrestlemania II after party in Los Angeles. Cue Melina, who looks rather upset. They both insist that it isn’t her, as….apparently they had, ahem, a “meeting” on the Fourth of July. Melina better hope that their meeting was, ahem, harmless, or she’s suing him for everything he has. I think he’ll be fine as Vince was in New York for Wrestlemania II, not Los Angeles.

Anyway, there’s one more person but Coach doesn’t want to bring them out. Vince insists though and the glass shatters, meaning we get that classic Vince panic. Austin thinks Vince could be his pops and he could be the fruit of his loins. The result of what came from Vince’s grapefruits if you will. Vince says there’s no chance of that, which Austin says is too bad.

They never had the chance to play catch, go to a football game, build a go kart or teach him how to water ski. Vince never even got to have that talk about the birds and the bees with him. They didn’t get to have a beer together but Vince has had enough of this. Austin thinks the easy thing would be Stunning Vince, but he would rather help him out with the grapefruits instead, meaning a bunch of low blows. Coach gets the Stunner instead and beer is consumed. Vince pulls himself up and gets a Stunner of his own. This was a few jokes until we got to the Austin/Vince moment and that’s always going to work. The search continues.

John Cena vs. Carlito

Non-title and this is the Big Apple Showdown. Cena tackles him down to start and pounds away with right hands. Carlito is sent outside but manages to pull Cena to the floor as we take a break. Back with Cena hitting the top rope Fameasser for two and the STFU makes Carlito tap in a hurry. Not enough shown to rate but this was almost a Cena squash.

Post match Randy Orton comes in and gives Cena an RKO through an open chair. Cena is out cold and Orton yells at him a lot before staring, evily.

Post break, Randy Orton says that’s just the beginning and he’ll take the WWE Title at Summerslam.

There are a bunch of women at ringside for the boxing match.

Matt Hardy vs. Evander Holyfield

Michael Buffer is here to handle the introductions, including one for MVP, in Holyfield’s corner. Matt is at least wearing headgear to prevent a bad case of destruction. We have two minute rounds and Holyfield knocks him down in about a minute. Hardy gets back up and is down again in about twenty seconds. Somehow he survives again to end the round, with MVP being very pleased. The bell rings for the second round and Holyfield doesn’t want to beat him up anymore. MVP comes in and tells Holyfield to do it, earning himself a knockout. This is about all they could have done and at least they made it fast.

CM Punk/Boogeyman vs. John Morrison/Big Daddy V

ECW actually gets the closing spot. Matt Striker is here with V and they’re moving through the entrances pretty fast. Punk and Morrison start things off with Punk rolling him up for tow. Morrison sends him throat first into the middle rope so Punk clotheslines him over the top to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Boogeyman backdropping Morrison a bit harder than he needed to but Striker’s distraction lets V come in. That means Boogeyman is thrown around this time but he does avoid a charge in the corner. It’s back to Punk with the springboard clothesline to Morrison but he’s back up with a knee to the head. Not that it matters though as Punk grabs a small package for the pin.

Rating: C-. This felt like they were running out of time and had to squeeze everyone in there while they could. I’ll take that over not having the match, though V didn’t do much here, which might be a good thing. Punk gets another boost for his title match and that was the point here.

Commentary sends us to a fast highlight video to wrap up the show.

Overall Rating: C. Keeping in mind that this was just a way to build to a pay per view, it was completely watchable. They probably could have cut this down to an hour instead of an hour and a half, but at least they covered a lot of stuff and had the Vince/Austin deal in the middle. Absolutely not a show you need to see, but it would have been completely acceptable background noise while you fold your neighbor’s towels.

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Dynamite
Date: January 19, 2022
Location: Entertainment & Sports Arena, Washington DC
Commentators: Jim Ross, Excalibur, Tony Schiavone

It’s a big night around here as we have the return of Jon Moxley after a nearly three month absence. Moxley has been out of action due to undergoing alcohol rehabilitation treatment and it is great to have him back. What matters most is that he is healthy and if that is the case, I’m glad he can be around here again. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Jon Moxley to a hero’s welcome to get things going. Moxley gets in the ring and, after telling a fan “Go f*** yourself, get that piece of s*** out of here” (completely uncensored on the broadcast), Moxley talks about having a dream where a demon told him he would never make it. He has more scars on his body than most people and those are the things that tell our story. Those scars are the ones that tell us the story of who we are. Nobody is perfect and no one should be afraid to stand up and bare it all.

Everything that makes you the person you are, scars and all, should make you say THIS IS ME. If you want to write him off, he’ll tell you where to shove all that s***, just like he told that demon. For everyone who has supported him, thank you. He is going on a pilgrimage and do whatever he wants to the world of professional wrestling because he is truly free. No one here can put him through worse than he has been through and these days, all he drinks is blood. Well that was amazing, and one of the most emotional speeches you’ll see in a LONG time.

MJF talks about CM Punk needing to steal a win by using the hair and trunks last week to beat Wardlow (who could have escaped with a bit more experience). As for this week, it is Wardlow’s birthday and MJF offers him a sincere apology for losing it last week. Wardlow seems to appreciate that….but MJF is docking Wardlow’s pay for putting his hands on him. MJF moves on to Shawn Spears, who is going to hand PG Punk his first loss, while teaching Wardlow a lesson. The turn is going to be incredible when we finally get there.

Adam Cole/Britt Baker vs. Kris Statlander/Orange Cassidy

The women start but Baker tags out almost immediately. Then Cole tags out, meaning Statlander has to come back in. Hold on though as Cassidy does the lazy kicks, earning himself a stomp to the food. Statlander comes in to slam the posing Baker but it’s too early for the Big Bang Theory. It’s back to the men, meaning Cassidy can hit a tornado DDT to send Cole outside.

Back in and Statlander grabs a delayed vertical suplex on Baker, with Cassidy shoving it over. Cassidy hits a rather low dive on Cole before stopping for a pose, allowing Baker and Cole to superkick them down. A nice kiss sends us to a break and we come back with Cassidy taking Cole down.

The women come back in with Statlander hitting a Blue Thunder Bomb for her own two. A neckbreaker takes Statlander down though and it’s back to Cole for the superkick to Cassidy’s knee. Cole hits an enziguri but Stundog Millionaire gets Cassidy out of trouble. Baker comes in off the blind tag to break up Beach Break and Stomp Cassidy down. Statlander kicks her in the face and hits something like a Falcon Arrow for two.

Area 451 is loaded up but Cole covers Baker….which is fine with Statlander, who splashes both of them. The Beach Break hits Cole for two but he superkicks a dive out of the air. Baker takes Statlander to the ramp for a Canadian Destroyer, leaving Cole to Panama Sunrise Cassidy for two. With nothing else working, Cole loads up a table at ringside (because we need tables), only to have Cassidy accidentally knock Baker through it. Cole is livid and it’s a low blow into the Boom for the pin at 14:22.

Rating: C+. That’s it for the feud right? There is no reason for Cole and Cassidy to feud any longer and hopefully we can move on and let Cole do something more important. The match was your usual AEW match with big kickouts and went on a bit longer than necessary, but it did have the entertaining bits that you would expect.

Chris Jericho tells Eddie Kingston to GFY but Santana and Ortiz don’t like him talking about Kingston that way. Actually, when has Jericho even had their back? Maybe next week, they can prove that they don’t need Jericho. That seems to shake Jericho a bit.

Adam Cole is sick of Orange Cassidy. He has beaten Cassidy every way he can, but now Cassidy is attacking Baker? Next week, it can be No DQ, anything goes, lights out. It might not be a good idea to point out that you have beaten the guy over and over before challenging him to another match. And great, ANOTHER hardcore match.

CM Punk vs. Shawn Spears

MJF is on commentary as the GTS finishes Spears at 12 seconds. Much like last week: that’s how I like my Spears matches.

Post match Punk poses so MJF tries to sneak in, only to have Punk jump in his face. Punk grabs the scarf but MJF bails from the threat of a right hand.

Billy Gunn stops Christian Cage in the back and says his sons have earned a Tag Team Title shot against Cage’s friends, the Jurassic Express. Cage says make a statement and they’ll talk. Cue the Gunn Club to jump Christian and send him head first into the steel door. Billy as a mouthpiece for his kids is a completely acceptable idea and an upgrade over what he has been doing.

Here is Cody Rhodes, with a huge ladder in the ring. Rhodes talks about CM Punk’s pipe bomb, which was the beginning of a revolution. Some of the things Punk were saying were the blueprint for what AEW would do. After pausing for some negative chants, Cody talks about how Punk made the comeback of the decade and we are all living it. Cody starts yelling about how he carried the revolution and since “you ask me why I won’t turn heel”, it’s because they cheered him when he needed it the most.

There are industry journalists who talk about opening the forbidden door…and now let’s talk about how ReDRagon passed hiptoss class. There are wrestlers elsewhere named Gunner McGillcutty or whatever it is but then he was gone for two weeks and there is an Interim TNT Title. Fans have been taught to believe that any title without the word World in it doesn’t matter.

That’s why he wants to face Sammy Guevara in a ladder match at Beach Break for the undisputed title. I got the gist of what Cody was saying here, but this was all over the place with one idea after another thrown out there but he kept moving on before getting to the point. The ladder match (because this company loves ladder matches) is a fine way to unify the titles, but this was a rambling mess of an insider/shoot promo and it was all about Cody, again, without making much sense until the end.

Jade Cargill has issued an open challenge for the TBS Title and Anna Jay is ready to accept it. Jay talks about the hardcore match from a few weeks ago to show she’s ready.

Kings of the Black Throne vs. Varsity Blonds

Brody shoves Garrison around to start and sends him outside, meaning it’s off to Pillman. That doesn’t work though as Pillman won’t try Air Pillman. Instead he drops outside to talk to Garrison, who is driven into the steps. Back in and Black sweeps Pillman’s leg so Garrison can hit a backsplash. Garrison is taken out again and Dante’s Inferno finishes Pillman at 1:48.

Post match Black tells the House of Black to rise but Pac, still blind, pops up on screen to say he is beyond Black’s reach.

Video on Lance Archer vs. Hangman Page, with Jake Roberts returning to say Archer is ready for Page.

Roppongi Vice steals Brandon Cutler to challenge the Young Bucks to a match on Rampage. They beat the Bucks in Japan once so they can do it again. Cutler thinks the Bucks are going to kill him. Romero: “Then turn the camera off bro.”

Lance Archer vs. Frankie Kazarian

Jake Roberts and Dan Lambert are in Archer’s corner. Archer hammers him down before the bell and then stands on Kazarian’s neck. The beating continues with Archer slowly pounding away as Kazarian can’t get anything going. Kazarian gets dropped again and again and we take a break.

We come back with Archer loudly saying “F*** YOU” (seemingly to a fan) and sending Kazarian chest first into the buckle. The Blackout is broken up with Kazarian finally getting in a little something. That doesn’t work for Archer though and he chokeslams Kazarian down as this is going WAY too long. Archer finally finishes with the Blackout at 10:01.

Rating: D. This was a bad miss, as Archer didn’t look like a monster but rather a guy lumbering around and (very) slowly beating Kazarian down. I don’t know if they were told to fill in time or what, but they took what should have been a three minute match and stretched it way further than it needed to be. This doesn’t make me want to see Archer vs. Page, but rather seeing a big audible call.

Post match, Dan Lambert goes on another cowboy rant against Hangman Page, but Archer cuts him off because he’s sick of this s*** (as we have even more swearing, which isn’t as edgy as AEW seems to think it is). Archer loads up a chokeslam off the ramp but here is Hangman Page for the save. Page gets kneed down so he pulls off his cowboy boot to blast Archer in the head. The Buckshot Lariat is blocked so Page forearms him out to the floor. Page stands tall.

Dante Martin is ready for Team Taz, with Lee Moriarty and Matt Sydal having his back until his brother gets back.

Ricky Starks and Powerhouse Hobbs are going to prove Martin is all alone because he’ll need someone to watch every side.

Leyla Hirsch breaks up a Red Velvet/Kris Statlander interview to complain about their loss on Friday. Velvet says it was miscommunication and gets her arm barred as a result.

Serena Deeb vs. Skye Blue

Deeb takes her down to start and sends Blue to the apron to keep up the beating. Back in and some uppercuts to the back of the heck set up a fisherman’s neckbreaker. The Serenity Lock finishes Blue at 2:50. I can absolutely go for more of this Deeb.

Ethan Page wants a big match on Rampage and tells Tony Khan to put the franchise player in.

On Rampage: Ethan Page vs. Jon Moxley, plus Roppongi Vice vs. the Young Bucks. We get some New Japan footage of their previous matches.

Video on Hook.

Matt Hardy has signed Andrade El Idolo 51% of the Hardy Family Office but he is still in charge of the board of directors. Andrade will be the president though, and they are now the AHFO. Now, they want Darby Allin. I’ll take them combining some of their more boring acts into one.

Acclaimed vs. Darby Allin/Sting

Caster’s rap promises to make this worse than Starrcade 97 so you know it’s serious. The Acclaimed jump them before the bell as Tony says he still can’t explain Starrcade 1997. A chair is wrapped around Allin’s neck and Caster whips it into the post. Sting is back up as medics check on Allin but he’s willing to fight on his own. Sting takes the Acclaimed down to start but the Stinger Splash hits an exposed buckle, giving Bowens two.

We take a break and come back with Sting putting Caster in the Deathlock. Bowens hits a discus forearm but Sting yells and doesn’t let go. A superkick breaks it up but Allin comes back in to make the save. Allin gets taken down again so the Mic Drop can give Caster two. Sting backdrops Bowens over the top and splashes Caster through a table at ringside. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” I don’t think YOU STILL GOT IT is a term that applies to something that Sting rarely did, but fair enough. The Coffin Drop finishes Bowens at 9:20.

Rating: C+. Sting matches are all smoke and mirrors, but dang they’re fun smoke and mirrors. They aren’t doing anything too bad and the fans’ reactions alone carry the matches to another level. That being said, Sting and Allin have to be close to being #1 contenders right? They’re undefeated and just beat the #1 contenders, so shouldn’t their title shot be coming soon? That’s not a bad thing, but it should be addressed.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m not sure what happened tonight but this might have been the biggest miss Dynamite has had to date. There were good parts to it (Gunn being moved into a manager role (at least for now), Deeb’s squash, the main event, Spears going short again and King/Black’s debut) but the rest was a bit of a mess. It felt like they didn’t have a plan tonight and it was kind of all over the place.

The biggest standout part was the Cody promo, which started and ended well but took a right turn into lala land in the middle. I still don’t know what he was trying to say with a lot of that and it was one of the bigger head scratchers in recent memory. In addition, you have Cole saying that he has done everything he can to Cassidy, including pinning him tonight, but now we’re going to do it AGAIN, and this time in a hardcore match.

That is where AEW is starting to slip a bit for me, as it feels like they are trying to be a modern day ECW. Between the constant hardcore based matches (I believe Cole vs. Cassidy makes three since December 31), the table spots (two tonight) and ALL THE SWEARING, it feels like they are trying to push the envelope for the sake of pushing the envelope. When you do that kind of thing all the time, the impact goes away very fast and that is what they are doing now. Just pull it back a bit and save that stuff for when it matters, not whenever you can throw it out.

Overall, this show just did not feel like AEW quality. Dynamite has been good to excellent most of the time but they have been missing a bit in recent weeks. I don’t know if that is due to some kind of Covid deal shaking things up backstage or something else, but the shows have not been the best as of late. Maybe they need to change something backstage, because this is starting to trend in a bad direction.

Results
Adam Cole/Britt Baker b. Orange Cassidy/Kris Statlander – Boom to Cassidy
CM Punk b. Shawn Spears – GTS
Kings of the Black Throne b. Varsity Blonds – Dante’s Inferno to Pillman
Lance Archer b. Frankie Kazarian – Blackout
Serena Deeb b. Skye Blue – Serenity Lock
Sting/Darby Allin b. Acclaimed – Coffin Drop to Bowens

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: August 14, 2007
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Things have changed again as we now have a bit company wide angle. Vince McMahon has an illegitimate child who is a wrestler on one of the brands, meaning the ECW roster is in contention. That could open up some doors for some interesting options, but we also have an upcoming ECW World Title match between John Morrison and CM Punk. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vince McMahon finding out that his child is a wrestler and dreading the possibilities.

Jonathan Coachman is here to say he is still searching for the surprise McMahon. That means he is going to be busy, but he has a solution. Coach brings out the new ECW General Manager: Armando Estrada (Not to be confused with Armando Alejandro Estrada. I think they’re cousins.). After saying we can call him Commandante and hoping that McMahon made frequent trips to Cuba back in the day (if you know what he means), it is time for the contract signing for the ECW World Title match at Summerslam.

John Morrison and CM Punk come out, with Morrison saying that this is as close as Punk will ever get to the title. Morrison signs, while saying Punk couldn’t last fifteen minutes last week. Punk says that’s right, because he beat Morrison last week. They yell at each other, with Punk insulting Morrison’s clothes and signing. Estrada says he likes the fire because both of them will be in action tonight.

CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V

Matt Striker is here with V. Punk gets shoved down to start and V crushes him in the corner to make it worse. Back up and Punk hits a running knee in the corner, only to get caught with something like a powerbomb. A running charge knocks Punk off the apron and into the announcers’ table for the fast countout.

Rating: D+. Pretty lame reason for a countout to end a short match, but they didn’t have many other options to make this work. They didn’t want either of them to lose so the weak countout ending was as good as they could have done. Punk got in nothing here though and I’m not sure why they needed to do this in the first place.

Video on the Boogeyman.

Tommy Dreamer comes up to Armando Estrada in the back and says he wants the winner of the Summerslam title match. Estrada doesn’t seem to like that because Dreamer is lazy. Dreamer also has 60 seconds to make it to the ring for his match. We get a clock on the screen as Dreamer runs into various things and winds up limping into the ring. It’s about to get worse too.

Big Daddy V vs. Tommy Dreamer

V pounds away and hits a Samoan drop, followed by a splash and a big running elbow for the easy pin.

Miz, with Layla and Brooke, run into Kelly Kelly talking to Balls Mahoney. Miz laughs off the idea of Kelly and Balls getting together, with Kelly not being able to say much. Layla says they have to do something and the women all leave with Miz, as Mahoney is left sad.

Kevin Thorn vs. Stevie Richards

Thorn powers him into the corner to start but Richards fights out and hammers away. Some rights and lefts don’t have much effect though as Thorn tosses him into the corner. A knee to the back keeps Richards in trouble and we hit the chinlock. Back up and some clotheslines rock Richards again as this is mostly one sided so far. Richards fights back with some kicks and what would become known as the Codebreaker for two. That’s too much for Thorn, who hits a spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what the point was in having Richards win a few matches and then lose, as it doesn’t quite make Richards look good to go 2-1 against him with the last being a loss. At the same time, beating Richards in the thirst match doesn’t make it much better. Also, an underdog Richards sounds more interesting than Thorn at the moment, but WWE going with the guy who is already beyond his expiration date makes sense.

Post match Thorn beats on him even more and that’s a referee’s decision, meaning Richards wins again.

Coach talks to Elijah Burke about his parentage.

Summerslam rundown.

We look back at CM Punk beating John Morrison last week to earn the Summerslam title shot.

John Morrison vs. Boogeyman

Non-title. They lock up to start with Morrison being sent into the corner early on. Back up and Morrison’s springboard kick to the face misses but he Peles Boogeyman off the top. Some right hands give Morrison two and a sliding lariat is good for the same. The armbar goes on before Morrison kicks him in the ribs a few times. The corkscrew moonsault misses though but so does Boogeyman’s splash in the corner. Now the springboard kick to the face connects and Morrison hammers away….for the DQ.

Rating: C. Not too bad here, but that’s the second match in a row that resulted in the referee calling off a match because of violence. The match didn’t exactly make Morrison look great, but then again you don’t want Boogeyman in there for a long match in the first place. It also doesn’t help that Boogeyman was last seen getting squashed by Big Daddy V, but I doubt WWE remembers that one.

Post match Boogeyman hits the chokebomb but Morrison bails from the worming to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird show, as both CM Punk and John Morrison came off looking fairly weak here. That doesn’t exactly make me care about the upcoming title match but it isn’t like it means much in WWE either. There wasn’t much on the Vince side either, but at least Richards won again (eventually). Somehow, that is the story that has me the most interested, which doesn’t bode well for ECW’s immediate future.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Dynamite
Date: January 12, 2022
Location: PNC Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur

It’s time to get a bit more back to normal after last week’s major show. That could mean a few things this week, as AEW has a bit of a strange definition of normal. World Champion Hangman Page is here and we have a showdown between CM Punk and Wardlow, which means MJF will be around too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here are Adam Cole and ReDragon for a chat. Cole brags about how awesome the three of them are and how he is undefeated in singles action. ReDragon is the baddest team in wrestling….but here are the Young Bucks and Brandon Cutler to interrupt. Cole tries to play peacemaker and they all seem to be friends, because both teams are better than people like the Best Friends.

Cue the Best Friends and Orange Cassidy, with Cole calling their music stupid. The fight is on in a hurry but Cole hits Cassidy low. The beatdown is on but Kris Stadtlander comes in to stare Cole down. Britt Baker runs in to take Stadtlander out and the double kiss is loaded up, but Baker will take care of that too. A lot of posing ensues.

Video on Wardlow.

CM Punk vs. Wardlow

MJF is here with Wardlow. Punk drops to the floor to glare at MJF but Wardlow is waiting for him. Back in and Wardlow powers Punk into the corner so Punk comes back with a headlock. Some forearms take Punk down in the corner as the slow pace continues. Wardlow shrugs off a kick to the leg and tries the Powerbomb Symphony. Punk bails to the floor in a hurry though and we take a break.

Back with Punk escaping another Powerbomb Symphony and striking away to little avail. Clotheslines and strikes put Wardlow down to one knee and the springboard clothesline finally drops him. Punk’s right hands in the corner are finally countered into the first powerbomb and the Powerbomb Symphony is on. Five powerbombs connect…but MJF gets on the apron and says he wants more.

More powerbombs plant Punk again and he is mostly done on the apron. MJF wants Wardlow to powerbomb her through a table at ringside and gets just what he asks for, leaving Punk barely moving. Punk somehow manages to beat the count back in (with JR saying the count is being rather lenient)…where he small packages Wardlow for the pin at 14:06.

Rating: C+. I’m not sure about that one, as while I know where it’s going, it’s a bit much to accept Wardlow getting pinned off a small package after all that. MJF’s deal was perfectly fine and made sense, but seeing Wardlow get pinned after that is a bit much to take. It made Wardlow look great and dominant, but I wasn’t wild on that ending.

Post match MJF yells at Wardlow but Wardlow grabs his hand. Violence is teased but Shawn Spears runs in for the save.

Powerhouse Hobbs vs. Dante Martin

Hobbs starts fast and throws Martin around on the floor before the bell. The spinebuster plants Martin no the floor and tosses him inside to keep up the beating. A big slam lets Hobbs rip at Martin’s face and a hard clothesline takes him down again. Martin slips out of a torture rack but Hobbs crushes him with a crossbody. Hobbs whips him hard to the floor where Ricky Starks can get in some stomping as we take a break.

Back with Hobbs still not being able to get the torture rack as Martin slips out for a springboard missile dropkick. Martin knocks him outside for a springboard corkscrew dive. They get back in where Hobbs runs him over, though their heads seemed to have collided. Starks tries to offer a distraction but Jay Lethal (hey he still works here) pulls Starks off the apron. Martin hits a quick Nose Dive for the pin at 10:07.

Rating: C+. It wasn’t quite the same thing but this was another match where the power guy beat up someone until they won on a quick shot. Martin winning to continue frustrating Taz is a good way to go and having ANYTHING for Lethal to do is something overdue. They have done a good job with making Martin feel like a bigger and bigger deal. Good enough stuff here, even with Hobbs slipping on a banana peel.

The Inner Circle is proud to have won the Faction Of The Year and are ready for Sammy Guevara to win tonight. Cue Eddie Kingston to say he has a bad knee but also to blame Jericho for Santana and Ortiz not being Tag Team Champions. Santana and Ortiz leave before things get more serious. Jericho says he’ll be down there in tonight’s main event and threatens Kingston if he is down there too.

Here is a livid MJF to say this isn’t happening and the match is happening next week. Next week, it’s CM Punk vs. SHAWN SPEARS!

Adam Cole, ReDragon and the Bucks aren’t happy with Kris Stadtlander, and now they have someone to deal with her. Cue Britt Baker so the challenge for the mixed tag is thrown out. No one can remember Brandon Cutler’s name, again.

Here is Hangman Page, in a Smokey the Bear shirt, for a chat. Page talks about spending ninety minutes in the ring with Bryan Danielson, where he has spent all kinds of blood. That’s not enough though because the new year means the records have been reset. He needs a new challenger so….here is Dan Lambert (Page: “Shoot me.”) to interrupt. Lambert talks about how Page never used his backstage connections like Cody Rhodes. He doesn’t like Page’s gimmick though, because there have been some great cowboys in wrestling history.

Anyone from the Carolinas or the Virginias trying to steal their clout comes off like they are full of cowboy s***. Page talks about growing up on a farm and then coming here instead of signing a $600,000 contract, which he calls cowboy s***. Cue Lance Archer to grab Lambert, who tells him not to miss his chance at being in the ring with the World Champion. Archer jumps Page and beats him down with a chair, setting up the Black Out through the open chair. Archer vs. Page will be a good one off title match.

Arn Anderson is proud of Lee Johnson and his son Brock Anderson as a new tag team. They’re in Horsemen Country but here are Tully Blanchard and FTR to say Arn is rather right. The challenge is on and Brock/Lee are in for next week.

We look at Jade Cargill winning the TBS Title and she promises to keep it.

Hikaru Shida vs. Serena Deeb

Deeb jumps her from behind during the entrances and it’s a kendo stick to the knee. Shida kicks the stick away but gets kicked into the steps. She manages to get inside so Deeb unloads on her in the corner. A dragon screw legwhip out of the corner stays on the leg, allowing her to twist the knee around again. The knee is rammed into the mat to set up the Serenity Lock so the referee stops it at 1:59.

Post match the medic comes out to check on Shida but Deeb hits her with the kendo stick anyway. Referees come in to break it up and Deeb finally leaves.

Christian Cage and the Jurassic Express is happy with their Tag Team Titles. They’ll face any top five team so here are Alex Reynolds and John Silver, who were there in all of two seconds. The match is set for Rampage.

Matt Hardy vs. Penta El Cero Miedo

Private Party and Alex Abrahantes are here too. Before the match, Matt promises to send Penta to the hospital with his brother Fenix. We get DELETE vs. CERO MIEDO to start and that goes on for so long that JR is reminding us of the time limit. Penta kicks him in the ribs but gets hit in the back of the head. Back up and Hardy gets sent into the corner, setting up the running chop.

We take a break and come back with Penta hitting a gutbuster for two and hitting an Alberto double stomp out of the corner for the same. The Fear Factor on the apron is blocked and it’s time to slug it out instead. Instead Matt hits a Side Effect onto the apron for two and DELETING ensues. Matt misses the moonsault though and now the Fear Factor can give Penta the pin at 8:51.

Rating: C. Matt Hardy continues to not exactly be the most thrilling guy to watch in the ring and that was the case here. The good thing is that he didn’t win, as that would have been more than a stretch at this point. Penta gets a win to put him back on track, but last week would suggest that there are some bad things coming for him.

Post match Penta calls out Malakai Black so here he is to unload on Penta with the kicks to the head. Black goes for the mask so here are the Varsity Blonds to help beat Black down. The fans chant for BRODY KING and the lights go out again….and here is BRODY KING to clean a lot of house.

Kris Stadtlander, with Leyla Hirsch and Red Velvet, is ready for Britt Baker next week. Hirsch thinks she’s selfish for not focusing on their six woman tag on Friday. Velvet tells them to get it together. Their opponents aren’t mentioned.

Acclaimed vs. Bear Country

Max Caster’s rap brings up Novak Djokovich and blasts Sting/Darby Allin. Bear Country unloads on Acclaimed to start but Caster manages a high crossbody for a breather. We take a break and come back with Boulder not being able to hit a double chokeslam but being able to hit a double Downward Spiral. The Bear Bomb (JR: “Not the Bear Bomb!”) misses Caster so he snaps Bronson’s throat across the top. The Mic Drop finishes for Caster at 6:18.

Rating: C-. This felt more like a Rampage match than something that belonged on Dynamite, though at least they are building up the Acclaimed for a change. I can’t imagine they go any further than losing to Sting/Darby Allin, but that is better than some teams can get. The rapping stuff will take them fairly far, and the good thing is that they can use it to be reheated without much effort.

Post match the lights go out again (come up with something new) and here is Sting with the baseball bat. The distraction lets Darby Allin come in from behind for the big beatdown, including Sting beating on the boom box.

Pac shows us a bunch of photos of himself with no eyes. Malakai Black blinded him but now he sees everything.

Here’s what’s coming on some upcoming shows.

Matt Hardy isn’t happy but here is Andrade El Idolo to suggest they can make a deal. They’ll talk elsewhere.

Interim TNT Title: Sammy Guevara vs. Daniel Garcia

Guevara is defending, Chris Jericho and Eddie Kingston are at ringside and David Crockett is here to present the winner with the title (again). They go straight to the fight with Garcia punching him in the face to get an early breather. Sammy knocks him outside though and there’s the dive to take him down. Back in and the GTH is broken up and Garcia gets in a shot to the face to take over.

We take a break and come back with Sammy knocking him outside for a double springboard flip dive. They get back inside where Garcia hits a belly to back suplex for two (“covering with alacrity” according to Excalibur. Another GTH attempt is countered into a Scorpion Deathlock, with Sammy going straight to the ropes.

Sammy is back up with a messy looking Cross Rhodes for two so he tries another springboard. This time Garcia is ready for him by countering into a choke, followed by a hard piledriver for two. Cue 2.0 to go after Kingston and Jericho before one of them gets up on the apron. That’s fine with Guevara, who sends Garcia into him, setting up the GTH (without much contact) to retain at 12:34.

Rating: C+. This never reached the next level for me and it didn’t quite feel like it needed to be the main event. The Interim Title is a fine way to bridge the gap until Cody’s return though and having Sammy defend it makes things feel more important. Not a bad match by any means, but some of the moves weren’t hitting very cleanly and it took me out a few times.

Post match Jericho and Kingston go after 2.0, which leads to an argument between the two of them to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I really wasn’t feeling this show and a lot of the stuff felt skippable. There were a few things that happened, but it was one of those rare Dynamites where you would probably be better off just reading a recap rather than watching the two hours. That being said, if this is their weaker show, they are in a pretty good place, because it was hardly bad.

Results
CM Punk b. Wardlow – Small package
Dante Martin b. Powerhouse Hobbs – Nose Dive
Serena Deeb b. Hikaru Shida via referee stoppage
Penta El Cero Miedo b. Matt Hardy – Fear Factor
Acclaimed b. Bear Country – Mic Drop to Bronson
Sammy Guevara b. Daniel Garcia – GTH

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: August 7, 2007
Location: Chevrolet Center, Youngstown, Ohio
Attendance: 3,700
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the show with the match that sets up the match on the show, as CM Punk will be facing John Morrison in a 15 Minutes of Fame match. Should Punk win, he gets to challenge Morrison again for the ECW World Title at Summerslam. Other than that, we have…well not much here, other than Extreme Expose having a thing for the Miz. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of CM Punk winning a triple threat last week to earn the 15 Minutes of Fame tonight.

Opening sequence.

Boogeyman vs. Jesse Guilmette

Boogeyman has a large wig on, which he removes to show the new face paint from last week and a mouth full of worms (as you do). A bunch of clotheslines set up a slam and a rather lengthy top rope splash.

Post match, Guilmette gets wormed. Cue Matt Striker to literally shake a stick at Boogeyman until Big Daddy V jumps him from behind. The big beatdown is on, including a Samoan drop and a bunch of elbows. The worms are still all on the mat, which had to be embarrassing for Guilmette. So embarrassing that he changed his name to Pepper Parks and ultimately the Blade in AEW.

Elijah Burke vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer kicks at the leg to start and clotheslines Burke outside. For some reason Dreamer goes to pick him up from the apron and gets snapmared to the floor in a big crash. Back in and Burke hits the running slingshot elbow but Dreamer suplexes his way out of a chinlock. The Texas Cloverleaf is countered and Burke goes to the top, where Dreamer tries a superplex. That’s countered with a neck snap across the top, setting up the Elijah Express for the fast pin.

John Morrison dubs himself the Shaman of Sexy and the Guru of Greatness and doesn’t think much of CM Punk. They don’t serve diet soda in the Palace of Wisdom and after tonight, no one will remember Punk’s name.

HHH is back at Summerslam.

Miz vs. Balls Mahoney

Miz has Extreme Expose with him. Mahoney grabs a headlock to start and shoulders him down. Back up and Miz manages to knock Mahoney outside, where Kelly Kelly looks worried. Mahoney is sent back inside where he avoids a neckbreaker but walks into the Reality Check to give Miz the win.

Post match, Kelly Kelly continues to look worried about Mahoney.

CM Punk promises John Morrison will never forget his name.

Raw Rebound.

Stevie Richards is ready to talk about his wins over Kevin Thorn, but Thorn jumps him from behind and leaves him laying.

John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Non-title but it’s a 15 Minutes of Fame match, so if Punk wins/survives, he gets the ECW World Title shot at Summerslam. Feeling out process to start as Morrison takes him into the corner to start, only to be taken down by the arm. That’s reversed into Morrison’s armbar, which turns into a fight over a top wristlock. Morrison takes him down with a snapmare and points at the clock (now at about 11:00 to go) but Punk fights up and hits a dropkick.

A hard clothesline gives Punk two and a big running version sends Morrison outside. That means a slingshot dive to the floor but Morrison pops up (a bit too fast) to kick Punk off the apron. Punk is fine enough to suplex Morrison over the top and we take a break. Back with about 4:00 to go as Morrison gets two off a leg lariat.

The middle rope moonsault misses though and Punk kicks away, setting up the springboard clothesline for two. We’re down to two minutes as Punk rolls him up for two. Morrison is back with a backbreaker into a neckbreaker for two of his own but Punk gets a rollup for another two with a minute left. The GTS is broken up and Morrison hits an enziguri for a double knockdown. Not that it matters as Punk is back up with the GTS for the pin with five seconds left.

Rating: C+. The ending wasn’t quite in doubt and they didn’t make that much better by screwing up some of the drama near the end. Since a draw was the same as a win for Punk, the ending wasn’t really in doubt with about thirty seconds left. I do like Punk getting the pin though, as he needed to show he could beat Morrison after back to back losses.

Overall Rating: C. The main event is the only thing worth seeing but it was nice to see them advancing some other stories. The biggest flaw around here has been the World Title getting almost all of the focus so maybe they are starting to learn a bit. Not a great show, but it flew by and the main event set up ECW’s contribution for Summerslam, which needed to be done.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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