Monday Night Raw – July 5, 1993: He’ll Be Your Hero….If He Has To Be

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 5, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

We’re fresh off of the 4th of July and that means we have a new American hero. Yesterday saw a bodyslam challenge on the deck of the USS Intrepid. That means we are going to be seeing quite the push on the way to next month’s Summerslam but since the WWF has always been good at subtlety, they should be fine about pushing the new hero too hard. Let’s get to it.

We open with a look at some of the failed attempts at the bodyslam challenge on the USS Intrepid, but we don’t see the winner.

Opening sequence.

Commentary is rather excited about what happened yesterday.

We get an extended look at the bodyslam challenge, with no one being able to pull it off. Yokozuna even stopped for some rice during the middle of the contest. Tatanka chopped him but got beaten up before Crush got closer than anyone else. Randy Savage went last but couldn’t do it either and all hope was lost. Then a helicopter landed on the ship and LEX LUGER decided to be a real American (he has a flag shirt on after all) and called Yokozuna out. The fight was on and, after the steel forearm to the head, he (mostly) slammed Yokozuna. This was a heck of a moment and the staredown alone looked great. Now just follow it up.

Randy Savage praises Luger, whose challenge for a title shot has already been turned down.

Blake Beverly vs. 1-2-3 Kid

Kid is freshly off beating Razor Ramon so he’s far from established. Beverly yells at the crowd to start but gets dropkicked in the back, followed by a jumping kick to the chest to drop him again. Back up and Beverly gets in a shot of his own, followed by a neckbreaker. The Kid gets sent crashing out to the floor and the rather cocky Beverly slaps him in the face a few times.

Back in and a big toss over the top sends Kid crashing to the floor again, followed by an Oklahoma Stampede for two back inside. Kid misses a middle rope crossbody and a flying shoulder sends him crashing out to the floor. Beverly’s dive off the apron misses though and Kid hits a running flip dive. Back in and Beverly catches him with a belly to back suplex, only to get kicked down. A top rope legdrop gives the Kid the pin at 8:03.

Rating: B-. This was a match that told a nice story, with Beverly not buying that the Kid was anything more than a fluke and then getting caught as a result. That’s a smart way to go and Beverly is just enough of a name to make this feel important. The Kid is still getting started, but they’re doing it right in the early stages.

Men On A Mission raps. I think they want the titles.

Luna Vachon threatens us with Bam Bam Bigelow.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Joey Maggs

Some corner splashes finish Maggs in 41 seconds.

Watch All-American Wrestling!

Undertaker vs. Samu

Afa is here with Samu but Paul Bearer is still injured and the urn has been stolen (again). Samu hammers away to start before an exchange of shoulders goes nowhere. Undertaker tries a leapfrog and it doesn’t go well, which is probably why he doesn’t do it very often. A drop toehold of all things takes Samu down and Undertaker knocks him outside for some venting of frustration. Back in and Old School connects but Samu gets in a shot of his own to put Undertaker on the floor.

We take a break and come back with Undertaker being sent knees first into the steps. A powerslam gives Samu two and he knocks Undertaker outside again, only for Undertaker to grab him by the throat. Undertaker tosses him into the corner but misses the elbow. The top rope headbutt connects but Samu tries another, with Undertaker sitting up. The chokeslam and Tombstone finish Samu at 7:21.

Rating: C. The idea here was that the Undertaker was doing different things without Bearer around and it worked…kind of. The leapfrog was terrible and the match itself was only so good, but that’s what you have to expect from a Samu match. Undertaker needed a better opponent and Mr. Hughes was only going to take him so far in the near future.

Watch WWF Mania! Dang this company has a lot of shows.

Here is Yokozuna, with Mr. Fuji, for a chat. Fuji doesn’t hear the USA chants and brings up Lex Luger’s steel forearm. There was NO slam and Luger does not get a title shot because he is a CHEATER. Vince McMahon asks about Bret Hart or Randy Savage getting a title shot but here is Crush to interrupt. Crush thanks Luger for standing up for America and embarrassing anyone. He’d love that title shot and the match is on for next week.

Mr. Perfect vs. Brian Costello

PerfectPlex finishes at 1:00.

Commentary wraps us up and we see the slam one more time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. So this is pretty much where we are now, as the entire focus is on Lex Luger and little more. Other than that, the biggest story is the Undertaker against the monster of the month and that isn’t exactly enough to carry things. Hopefully they add in something as a bonus, because Luger slamming Yokozuna and then not being here the next week isn’t much to go on for the long term.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




King Of The Ring 1993 (2025 Edition): All Star Mode

King of the Ring 1993
Date: June 13, 1993
Location; Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bobby Heenan, Randy Savage

It’s another WWE Vault special as we’re looking back at one of the company’s on again/off again concepts. That could make for a good way to go, but this show has a bit of a hit and miss reputation. Bret Hart is the #1 seed and that’s good enough for me, though this is hardly a strong time for the company. Oh and Hulk Hogan is defending the WWF Title against Yokozuna in a Wrestlemania rematch. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the tournament and runs down the brackets:

Bret Hart
Razor Ramon

Mr. Perfect
Mr. Hughes

Jim Duggan
Bam Bam Bigelow

Tatanka
Lex Luger

Commentary previews the show, including the non-tournament stuff.

King Of The Ring First Round: Razor Ramon vs. Bret Hart

Heenan and Savage bicker about the 1-2-3 Kid’s famous upset of Ramon so JR ignores them to call the match as Hart starts in on the arm. Hart works on an armbar but can’t get a hiptoss, instead getting dropped by a hard clothesline. An elbow misses though and Hart is back on the arm, including another armdrag into an armbar.

Ramon gets evil by going to the eye before elbowing Hart in the face for two. The chinlock doesn’t work though as Hart reverses into a hammerlock and cranks away. Back up and Hart misses a charge into the post, allowing Ramon to really take over for the first time. A fall away slam gives Ramon two and he nails a running powerslam for the same.

Hart fights up and hits the atomic drop into the running clothesline for two as the fans are way into the comeback. The Five Moves Of Doom are cut off with the chest first crash into the buckle but the Razor’s Edge is blocked as well. A small package gives Hart a VERY near fall so Ramon takes him up top for the belly to back superplex. That’s reversed into a crossbody to give Hart the pin at 10:24.

Rating: B. It’s a good sign for Hart that he’s gotten this much better in just a few months, as this was quite a bit better than his match against Ramon at the Royal Rumble. This was Hart figuring out a bigger and stronger opponent, which is where he tends to shine. Good stuff here, though if Hart is the #1 seed, Ramon is dead last? Really?

We look at Mr. Hughes taking out the Undertaker, who needed a new monster to slay. The villains stole the Urn as well.

King Of The Ring First Round: Mr. Perfect vs. Mr. Hughes

My money is on Mr. Before the match, Heenan uses his Brain Scan to mock Perfect’s form on the gum swat, because he’s still bitter over Perfect deserting him. Hughes powers him into the corner to start and shrugs off a dropkick. Perfect is sent outside and comes back in to slug away with limited success. A neck crank keeps Perfect down for a bit and a big boot makes it even worse. The neck crank goes on again before a big whip into the corner has Perfect down again.

Bret Hart gets an insert interview, where he says he’d rather face Perfect in the second round. Back up and Perfect tries to jump over Hughes but both of them go down, with Perfect slugging away to keep things going. A missed charge in the ropes gives Perfect a breather and he manages a backdrop (Hughes doesn’t even lose his sunglasses) and there’s the necksnap. That’s enough for Hughes, who grabs the Urn and clocks Perfect for the DQ at 6:01.

Rating: C. Yeah there isn’t much that Perfect can do here, as they didn’t have time to go anywhere and the ending was just lame. Hughes is getting one of his biggest shots ever and he just hits Perfect for the lame DQ? It’s just a weird way to go, though Hughes was just a successful enough monster to feel like he could win, giving Hart another monster to slay in the semifinals.

Mr. Fuji and Yokozuna are ready for Hulk Hogan, who cheated at Wrestlemania. Not exactly but Hogan was hardly on fair footing there either.

King Of The Ring First Round: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Jim Duggan

Duggan is in the singlet style gear here so you know this isn’t going to go well. Bigelow grabs a headlock to start as JR is firmly in NFL resume mode. Heenan: “CAN IT! WHO CARES???” Duggan slugs back with a running shoulder to the floor, with Savage getting on him for spending way too much time playing to the crowd.

Back in and Duggan can’t pick him up, allowing Bigelow to start in on the ribs. The bearhug doesn’t last long and Bigelow misses a headbutt but Duggan still can’t slam him. The second bearhug works a bit better but Duggan fights out again. This time the slam works but Duggan misses a charge into the buckle. Bigelow’s top rope headbutt finishes Duggan at 5:01.

Rating: D+. I love Duggan but the magic was gone by 1993. That made this little more than a formality, though Duggan still did have the ability to slug it out with a big man. Bigelow was clearly the right way to go here as he was always worth a look and they didn’t waste an opponent on him, but yeah not much to see here.

The Steiner Brothers and the Steiner Brothers are ready for Money Inc. and the Headshrinkers in an eight man tag. This is from the Coliseum Video version of the show so it isn’t even the original broadcast.

King Of The Ring First Round: Tatanka vs. Lex Luger

Luger does his mirror entrance and has the steel forearm for a bonus. Hold on though as Luger has to put on an elbow pad or he’s out of the tournament. As Heenan panics over the pad ruling, Luger jumps Tatanka to start fast but stops to pose, with commentary losing it over how stupid he is here.

Tatanka is back in to chop him to the floor for a slam, followed by a clothesline for two back inside. The armbar slows Luger down again and Tatanka chops away at the shoulder as this is already feeling like the time limit draw of the tournament. Bam Bam Bigelow joins us for an insert promo which we can’t hear to start, but he seems to want to face Tatanka next.

The armbar goes on again but this time Luger fights out as you can hear the crowd getting rather quiet. A backbreaker out of the corner puts Tatanka down again and a rather delayed elbow gets an also delayed two (oh yeah the time limit draw is coming and they’re not hiding it). Luger actually hits his big jumping elbow for a VERY delayed two and we hit the chinlock.

Tatanka fights up and chops away as we have three minutes left. A big chop gets two as the fans are responding to actually seeing someone working faster. The top rope chop gets two but Luger knocks him down again and we get a double breather. A backdrop puts Tatanka down again and a suplex gives Luger a near fall with thirty seconds left. Another suplex gets another two and time expires at 15:00.

Rating: C-. This was one of the most frustrating things you can see in wrestling, as it was just a countdown until the obvious finish. There was no reason for them to do some of the things they were doing here other than killing time and that made for a tedious match. Tatanka’s comeback was good and they needed to do this to protect his undefeated streak, but find a more interesting way to do it.

Post match Luger talks about wanting to keep going and then takes the pad off to knock Tatanka silly.

Mr. Perfect doesn’t like Bret Hart saying he would prefer to face Perfect, with Gene Okerlund egging things on. Then they argue over whose dad could beat the other before bringing up Hart beating Perfect at Summerslam 1991. They do at least shake hands.

King Of The Ring Semifinals: Bret Hart vs. Mr. Perfect

Hart has a bandaged hand after the first round. They start slowly until Perfect takes him down by the head as commentary discusses whether or not Heenan was managing Perfect when Hart beat him for the Intercontinental Title. Ignore that he wasn’t, but Heenan seems to have forgotten that. Hart blocks a slam and kicks him away, setting up a headlock to grind away a bit.

Perfect gets up and gets pulled into another headlock, which is broken up as well. A nice dropkick sends Hart outside and Perfect hits a rather loud chop as the fans approve of what they’re seeing. Back up and Hart gets shoved off the apron for a huge crash (near a cooler full of ice, water and Pepsi). Hart is back in and Perfect’s missile dropkick gets a pair of near falls. Perfect goes up again but gets caught in a superplex, allowing Hart to start in on the leg. The Figure Four has Perfect in trouble until he makes the ropes, meaning Hart can grab another leglock to keep him in trouble.

That’s broken up and the sleeper goes on, with Perfect putting his foot on the ropes because he’s still a bit of a heel. Hart gets out again and starts the comeback, including the backbreaker into the middle rope elbow. The Sharpshooter is loaded up but Perfect gets smart by grabbing Hart’s bandaged hand. Back up and the PerfectPlex is blocked as Hart suplexes him out to the floor for a huge crash. Back in and Perfect tries a small package but Hart reverses into one of his own for the pin at 18:54.

Rating: A-. There are certain people who work very well together and these two have some very underrated chemistry. Hart continuing to get the better of Perfect is a cool thing to see as you know Hart had to work for this one. Perfect was game here too and I could have gone for a heck of a lot more of hero Perfect than we got over the years. He really was that good and it was on display here. Outstanding match.

Post match respect is (eventually) shown.

Hulk Hogan and Jimmy Hart give a VERY pro-America speech about how they’re protecting us from the evil Japanese threat. This would have been over the top during World War II.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Yokozuna

Yokozuna, with Mr. Fuji, is challenging and there are a lot of Japanese photographers at ringside. Heenan says this is a fresh Yokozuna, not one who wrestled a “thirty minute match” before Hogan faced him. That’s a stretch even for Heenan. Hogan comes out and sweet goodness he’s probably….oh 40lbs down from his traditional size or so?  Happy steroids trial everyone.

Hogan can’t shove him around to start but Yokozuna can shove him down rather quickly. A big slam drops Hogan again and Fuji is certainly approving. Back up and Hogan avoids a charge in the corner before hammering away with right hands. The running corner clothesline rocks Yokozuna but it’s way too early for the slam. Another attempt gets a leg up but Hogan falls down and is in trouble again. Hogan fights up and hits some running clotheslines but Yokozuna drops him with a single clothesline.

The big splash misses and Hogan has an opening, which is cut off with a bearhug. That stays on for a good while until Hogan fires off some right hands to free himself. Yokozuna drops him again though as Hogan just can’t keep anything going. The belly to belly suplex gets two (and Yokozuna gets some height on the kickout) as it’s time to Hulk Up. The big boot rocks Yokozuna but doesn’t drop him and a second has the same result.

A third big boot finally drops Yokozuna and the legdrop connects…for two, with the kickout putting Hogan back on his feet. Hogan has to deck Fuji but a photographer (with a huge beard) gets on the apron. Hogan goes over to him and the camera causes a fireball to go off in Hogan’s face. The big leg gives Yokozuna the pin and the title back at 13:07.

Rating: D+. There is only so much you can do for a match like this, but that’s how Hulkamania officially ends in the WWF in the 90s. They went out of the way to make sure Hogan didn’t get to slam him and that’s the big sign that things are changing. Hogan never should have gotten the title back in the first place and he had some protection with the camera, but Yokozuna kicking out of the legdrop was a big moment. Not a good match as expected, but it certainly has the historical significance.

Post match Hogan tries to get up but he can’t see. Yokozuna hits the Banzai Drop and Hogan is helped out, not to appear on WWF TV for nearly nine years.

Mr. Perfect is disappointed with his loss but he’d rather not talk about it.

Gene Okerlund talks about the love that Detroit has shown to the WWF (I’m thinking there was a promo for Summerslam 1993 cut out here) but wants to talk to Shawn Michaels and his new bodyguard. Michaels dubs the new bodyguard as Diesel (who had been around for all of five minutes at this point) but says he (as in Michaels) does the talking.

Steiner Brothers/Smoking Gunns vs. Money Inc./Headshrinkers

Welcome to the death slot guys. Scott and DiBiase start things off with Scott getting the better of things and sending DiBiase outside. Rick sends him back in, where Scott hits a Steiner Line out to the floor. Back in again (thanks Rick) and it’s off to Fatu vs. Bart, with latter of whom hits a dropkick into an armbar. Bart makes the mistake of ramming him head first into the mat, earning a shot to the face from Fatu.

IRS comes in for a back elbow and it’s back to DiBiase for a nice suplex. Samu drops a headbutt and a backbreaker gets two. IRS’ top rope right hand connects as IRS is fascinated by Money Inc.’s briefcase. Bart gets in a shot of his own though and it’s off to Billy to clean house. The Million Dollar Dream cuts Billy off though, only for DiBiase to let him go for some reason. Billy grabs a quick small package for the pin at 6:50.

Rating: C. There’s nothing to see here as the idea was just to put people in the ring after the big devastating title change. That’s what you need to do in a spot like this, even if the match meant pretty much nothing. It’s kind of a shame too, as there were some good tag teams in there.

Post match the brawl is on with the good guys cleaning house in a hurry. The Steiners would win the titles from Money Inc. the next day (and lose then two days later, only to win them back again three days later).

Jack Tunney congratulates Yokozuna and Mr. Fuji on the win. Fuji brags about doing exactly what they said they would do.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Crush

Michaels, with Diesel, is defending. They take their time to start until Crush grabs a headlock and then shoulders him down. The headlock goes on again before some leapfrogs frustrated Michaels. The superkick misses and Crush hits a pair of dropkicks to put him out on the floor. Back in and Crush gorilla presses him (with reps) and drops Michaels so casually that it’s kind of funny.

There’s the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and Diesel pulls Michaels to the floor for a breather. Crush goes after him but gets in a staredown with Diesel, allowing Michaels to get in a diving shot off the apron. Diesel sends Crush head first into the post and Michaels rams Crush’s head into the post over and over (GEEZ).

Back in and Crush actually kicks out so Michaels grabs a front facelock. That’s broken up with pure power as Crush sends him out to the floor and then swats away a dive off the top. Crush hits a big boot and drops the leg for two (not a good combination on this show)….and we have two Doinks. The distraction (it could be their cigars) lets Michaels hit a superkick to the back of the head to send Crush into the buckle and retain at 11:15.

Rating: C+. I’ve long since had a soft spot for Crush and I could have gone for seeing him do something more. Maybe not being the guy getting the Luger spot, but doing something else could have been interesting. This was memorable due to the RAM CRUSH’S HEAD INTO THE POST spot but there was pretty much no way that Michaels was losing when his new bodyguard was getting his big debut.

Bam Bam Bigelow is fresh and ready to become the first King Of The Ring. Short and to the point here.

King Of The Ring Finals: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Bret Hart

Hart is pretty banged up with a band hand and a slight limp. Bigelow goes with the big forearms to the back to start but Hart counters a gorilla press into a crossbody for two. More pounding drops Hart again and Bigelow launches him over the top for a big crash. Back in and Bigelow slowly hammers away, setting up a hard whip into the corner (back first for a change). Thankfully JR is right there to sell the impact and the pain, which is where he shines like few others.

A jumping elbow gives Bigelow two and we hit the bearhug. That’s broken up and they go outside, where Hart reverses a whip into the barricade. Back up and Hart is rammed into the post so Bigelow goes back inside. Cue Luna Vachon with a chair to drop Hart again but he actually makes it back inside. The top rope headbutt gives Bigelow the pin and the crown at 9:27….but here is another referee to point out the chair shot.

For some reason that isn’t a DQ and instead we keep going. Bigelow isn’t happy and hammers away again, with a headbutt knocking Hart silly again. The bearhug goes on again so Hart escapes, only to get headbutted into an over the shoulder backbreaker. That’s broken up as well and somehow Hart manages a belly to back suplex. Bigelow misses a backsplash and Hart fights up again, this time with a dropkick out to the floor.

The slingshot dive hits Bigelow and Hart hammers away as this feels like his last shot. Back in and a middle rope clothesline gives Hart two and the middle rope bulldog gets the same. The Sharpshooter is broken up so Hart tries another belly to back, with Bigelow landing on him (nice call back to earlier in the match) for two. Back up and Hart gets a boot up in the corner and grabs a victory roll for the pin at 18:21.

Rating: B+. Just in case you needed another great Hart match to close things out. As usual, Hart can do some of his best work against a monster and also as usual, he knows how to make you believe that he’s near death before making the comeback. Having Bigelow get a pin in there was kind of weird, but Hart was cheated to make it happen so it hardly brought anything down.

Post match Randy Savage runs in to hug Hart and they RUSH him over to the platform for the coronation. Hart gets the robe and the crown…and Jerry Lawler comes in, saying he’s the only king in the WWF. Lawler offers him the chance to kiss his feet, but Hart asks why he was never in the tournament in the first case. Hart starts the BURGER KING chant and Lawler jumps him from behind, beating him down with the scepter and kicking off a two year feud. JR is AGHAST and Lawler kicks Hart in the face, which he says is making Hart kick the royal feet. Hart is out to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. It’s so weird to see a show divided in half between Bret Hart and everything without Bret Hart. This was a one man all star performance from Hart, who had three awesome matches and…well everything else. What was the best match without him? The Intercontinental Title match I guess, and even that was just decent. Absolutely incredible work from Hart, with the Perfect match being outstanding, and not much else in the way of quality.

At the same time though, it’s a huge change of course though with Yokozuna taking the title back and getting rid of Hogan, who would be off to Hollywood and then WCW. That’s quite the big night, with Hart pretty clearly turning into the next star…but we had to deal with Luger’s face run first. In other words, 1993 WWF didn’t make a ton of sense, but Hart is awesome.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




WWF Supertape 4 (2025 Edition): LIAR!

Supertape 4
Host: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes
Commentators: Sean Mooney, Lord Alfred Hayes, Bobby Heenan

It’s time for another in this series and that could mean just about anything, as this series likes to stretch the definition of “super”. You never know what you’re going to get on this thing, though I’d assume on some wrestling from the WWF. Other than that, it could be quite the variety of quality so let’s get to it.

This is presented in the most complete form, which is a weird thing for a home video.

Opening sequence, which is likely just a preview of what we’ll be seeing.

Sean Mooney is tasked with delivering the master tape of Supertape 4 to Coliseum Video and he has a cooler, van, driver and tour guide. The van is labeled with a piece of paper and the driver is Lord Alfred Hayes…who doesn’t let the food or driver inside. Hayes already doesn’t know where they’re going but the cooler is left outside.

Mr. Perfect, with Bobby Heenan, has the Intercontinental Title back and insists he is perfect enough to beat the Texas Tornado.

From West Palm Beach, Florida, December 12, 1990.

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Perfect vs. Texas Tornado

Perfect, without Heenan, is defending. Tornado tries to slug away to start but takes too long taking off his robe, allowing Perfect to knock him outside. Tornado pulls him outside as well and gets in some shots of his own before throwing Perfect back inside. That means Tornado can throw him right back outside, as Tornado doesn’t have the clearest strategy. Back in (again) and Tornado hammers away before grabbing the Claw…on the stomach. With that broken up, Perfect grabs the sleeper until Tornado powers into the corner.

Tornado misses a charge into the post though and Perfect pulls a turnbuckle pad off. A quick Tornado Punch sends Perfect outside but another one hits the post by mistake. Back in and Perfect sends him into the post for two but the PerfectPlex only gets two. Tornado gets the Claw so Perfect pulls the referee in, only for the Tornado Punch to connect for a delayed near fall. Back up and Tornado hits another Tornado Punch….but NOW the referee calls for the DQ at 7:45. What a ridiculous ending.

Rating: C-. Perfect was trying here but there is only so much that can be done when Tornado is in this kind of shape. Tornado was clearly not right out there, which was becoming an issue more and more frequently. The guy looked great, but it didn’t matter if he couldn’t have a coherent match most of the time. Throw in a screwy ending and there was only so much to be done with this.

Post match Tornado sends him into the exposed buckle for the big spinning sell.

From New York City, New York, January 21, 1991.

Koko B. Ware vs. Tito Santana

This is a very rare face vs. face match and even Heenan thinks this will be good. They shake hands and then go to a lockup to start, with Heenan saying that his Family could have a better match. An armdrag takes Ware down and Santana does it again as they’re certainly in first gear so far. Santana snapmares his way out of a hammerlock and actually suggests a hair pull. A shoulder block into an armdrag puts Ware down and they seem to be getting a big agitated.

We get an exchange of shoves (Heenan: “I LIKE IT!”) before Ware punches him in the face as things get a lot more aggressive. They go outside where Ware sends him into the post before going back inside to hammer away. Ware slugs him down and drops an elbow for two, setting up the nerve hold. Some snap jabs have Heenan rather pleased, with Mooney thinking Ware might belong in the Heenan Family. The top rope fist drop misses though and Santana makes the comeback. They both miss clotheslines but Santana hits the flying forearm for the pin at 10:10.

Rating: C+. This was so strange to see and oddly enough, it worked well. Ware knows how to work this style and Santana is as good of a face as you’ll find, but dang this does doesn’t feel right in the WWF. I’ll take something going this way for a change though, as it was cool to see a fresh take on a match instead of more of the same.

Believe it or not, Hayes is lost.

We look at wrestlers who have gone from wrestling to broadcasting (From The Mat To The Mike), including Gorilla Monsoon, who talks about making the transition and promises to be around more often.

Roddy Piper gets a look as well and insists he is NOT retired. He makes some jokes about Vince McMahon and Roddy Piper before saying it’s better to not get beaten up.

We also have Gene Okerlund, which is an excuse to show his match with Hulk Hogan against Mr. Fuji and George Steele.

Finally Randy Savage talks about going against the best of all time and giving everything he had. Naturally he’s as intense as a broadcaster as he was as a wrestler.

The van has engine trouble.

From West Palm Beach, Florida, December 12, 1990.

Undertaker vs. Tugboat

This is the Fan Favorite match, meaning someone actually requested to see it. We’re VERY early in Undertaker’s time as he still has Brother Love as his manager. Undertaker slugs away to little effect as Tugboat shoves him back. An exchange of shoulders doesn’t go anywhere so Undertaker tries a leapfrog but Tugboat just stops, resulting in a knee to the head instead.

Back up and Tugboat elbows him down, which is quite the big deal for Undertaker at this point. Another elbow drops Undertaker but Tugboat misses the elbow drop. Undertaker hammers away but misses a charge in the corner, with Tugboat falling down as he tries a slam. Some shots to the back have Tugboat down again but he’s back up with a powerslam. A kick to the face rocks Undertaker again but Tugboat misses a charge in the corner. Undertaker’s top rope forearm to the chest is good for the pin at 5:43. Mooney: “What a great match this turned out to be!” LIAR!

Rating: D. I was a fan when I was a kid but my goodness Tugboat was HORRIBLE. He was big, he was slow, and those are his good points. Other than that, Tugboat just did not have anything to offer in the ring and that was on display here. Things would get a bit better when he would turn into Typhoon, but this was not a good time for him whatsoever.

From Savannah, Georgia, January 29, 1991.

Shawn Michaels vs. Crush

Marty Jannetty and Mr. Fuji are here too. Crush pounds away to start and blocks a sunset flip. Michaels hammers back and hits a flying shoulder but the kickout sends him flying outside. Back in and Michaels goes simple with a front facelock, which Crush powers into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.

A torture rack dropped down into a backbreaker keeps Michaels in trouble, followed by the required bearhug. With that broken up, Crush switches over to a bodyscissors but misses a top rope knee drop to leave them both down. Fuji gets on the apron as Crush catches Michaels, only for Jannetty to add a high crossbody to knock Michaels onto Crush for the pin at 7:19.

Rating: C+. Crush was little more than a monster for Michaels to slay here, as you could see Michaels’ singles star power trying to break through. That’s a great sign for his future and he is getting better before your eyes at this point. It’s no surprise that he is getting this kind of a singles push and it was working well enough.

Hayes and Mooney work on the van, with Hayes using Mooney’s jacket to clean up. They know the problem….but don’t know how to fix it.

From Huntsville, Alabama, January 7, 1991.

Mr. Fuji/Orient Express vs. Legion Of Doom

For some reason Fuji starts for the team but then switches out with Kato, while also playing pass the salt. Animal shoves Kato around and then does it again for a bonus. With that not working, Kato slaps him in the face and gets a chase going, allowing Kato to strike away back inside. Tanaka comes in and gets knocked down, where it’s time for a meeting with his cohorts.

Back in and Tanaka teases going after Hawk, who growls him away. Hawk fights off a double teaming and Kato bails out to the floor, where Animal picks him up for a gorilla press toss back inside. A running clothesline puts Kato on the floor again though and Animal clotheslines him there as well.

This isn’t going so well for him at the moment. Animal runs Tanaka over so Kato offers a distraction, with the salt to the eyes taking Animal down. That has Animal in trouble for all of a few seconds before he clotheslines his way to freedom. Hawk comes back in clean house and the Doomsday Device finishes Kato at 8:00.

Rating: C-. There was only so much you could get out of this kind of a match and there was no way around it. The LOD more or less squashed them here, with even the salt not being able to do much. That was part of the problem with the LOD: you could only put so many teams against them and that was the case at this point, as they didn’t have much in the way of competition.

And now, Gourmet Cooking Tips with the Bushwhackers. We start with a salad, which is thrown everywhere, then the mashed potatoes, which has a special ingredient, then broccoli, which results in bodily function jokes, and then walnut surprise cake, which is shoved into faces. We also get a flashback to Gene Okerlund becoming a Bushwhacker in the first Supertape thanks to some Bushwhacker Buzzard. Back in the kitchen, an apple goes into Okerlund’s mouth and the Bushwhackers want him for dinner. This was about ten minutes of not funny.

Hayes says he knows a good repairman and Mooney shows us to a profile on the Big Boss Man.

Boss Man talks about being the law and order around here and promises us three matches.

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, September 16, 1990.

Earthquake vs. Big Boss Man

Jimmy Hart is here (minus the megaphone for some reason) with the non-Canadian Earthquake. They take their time circling each other to start and finally lock up, with Earthquake shoving him hard into the corner. For some reason Hayes finds this hilarious, though it might be Earthquake doing the posing. Back in and Boss Man does his weird bouncing headlock before punching him into the corner.

Boss Man gets powered into the corner but knocks Earthquake down, followed by chasing Hart around the ring. Earthquake misses a charge into the corner and gets low bridged down for two, only for Earthquake to hit him in the throat. Boss Man gets sent into the corner so Earthquake can sit on him, which doesn’t go well.

Back up Earthquake wins a slugout and an atomic drop has Boss Man in more trouble. Boss Man gets up with a shot to the back of the head and a kick to drop Earthquake, setting up the running clotheslines. That means Earthquake gets tied up in the ropes, but Boss Man goes after Hart and an invading Dino Bravo. Earthquake gets out and hits him in the back, setting up a big elbow for the pin at 10:04.

Rating: C+. I liked the match, but it’s a bit weird to see Boss Man losing in a match designed to be part of his profile. That being said, it was a good brawl, as Boss Man was always good at slugging it out at someone bigger than him. It worked very well against Vader and this was a similar enough idea.

Post match Earthquake goes after him again but Tugboat makes the save.

From Syracuse, New York, November 20, 1990.

Bobby Heenan vs. Big Boss Man

So Heenan has spent weeks insulting Boss Man’s mother so it’s time for payback. Before the match, Heenan brings out a Hulk Hogan wrestling buddy (that’s worth some cash these days) as a gift to Boss Man’s mother, along with roses that he has already sent to her. Boss Man comes to the ring and shoves the wrestling buddy into his face. Heenan gets in a shot with the microphone so Boss Man hits him with the nightstick for the win at 31 seconds.

Post match Haku comes in and gets beaten down just as fast. Boss Man handcuffs them together but Mr. Perfect runs in to go after Boss Man as the other two leave. That’s broken up as well and Boss Man clears the ring, with Mooney declaring it a “great matchup.” Again, LIAR!

From Toronto, Ontario, Canada, November 25, 1990 (I believe, as I’ve seen multiple dates and locations for this one).

The Barbarian vs. Big Boss Man

Boss Man slugs away to start and hits a big boot, followed by a running elbow to send him outside. Back in and Barbarian strikes away for a change, only to get clotheslined out to the floor. Barbarian gets back in but has a big boot blocked, allowing Boss Man to hit the running crotch attack against the back. That doesn’t last long as Barbarian knocks him down for some ax handles to the back.

The bearhug goes on for a good while but Barbarian lets it go. The middle rope elbow misses for Barbarian though and they slug it out, with Boss Man doing his always rather awesome “out on his feet” selling. Boss Man kicks him in the head and grabs a hot shot for two but can’t hit a piledriver. Instead Barbarian backdrops him down…and right into a sunset flip to give Boss Man the pin at 11:18.

Rating: C. There is something cool about the way Boss Man sells and it was working again here. At the same time, Barbarian continues to be the perfect choice for a spot like this as he can make someone like Boss Man work but doesn’t lose any status whatsoever in defeat. This wasn’t anything special, but it could have been far worse.

Post match Haku runs in to help Barbarian with the double team. And no one makes the save. What a great way to wrap up a profile.

Mooney pulls up his pants to cross a stream. Hayes uses the footbridge about twenty feet away, which Mooney somehow didn’t notice.

From Huntsville, Alabama, January 7, 1991.

WWF Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Slaughter, with General Adnan, is challenging. They take their time to start until Slaughter takes him into the corner and chokes/kicks/hammers away. Warrior kicks right back though and a right hand sends Slaughter over the top, with his massive chin getting caught on the bottom rope (that’s a new one). Back in and Slaughter gets knocked out to the floor again, this time allowing Warrior to send him back inside for the hard chops.

Slaughter manages to knock him outside and send him into the timekeeper’s table before hammering away back inside. A catapult into the corner gives Warrior a breather though and a double clothesline puts both of them down. Slaughter grabs a backbreaker for two and puts on the camel clutch, with Warrior getting to the ropes for the break. Warrior Warriors Up, hits a flying shoulder and drops the splash to retain at 9:57.

Rating: C. Yeah you could only expect so much out of a match like this, as it was a dark match from a TV taping to send the fans home happy. The problem with that is there was only so much joy to be found in a Warrior match. He was mere days away from losing the title to Slaughter, so it was almost weird to seeing him win clean like this.

Mooney and Hayes realize they’re walking around in circles. Hayes walks off on his own, presumably leaving Mooney to die in the woods.

Overall Rating: C-. These compilations can be a lot of fun, but at the same time, they can also be rather dreadful. Unfortunately the latter was the case here, as nothing on here was worth seeing, with even the profile on Boss Man only being so good. Total waste of a tape, which fits the era rather well.

 

 

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WWF Superstars – April 25, 1992: When Hulk Is Away, Berzerker Attempts To Stab Undertaker

Superstars
Date: April 25, 1992
Location: Wings Stadium, Kalamazoo, Michigan
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect

The look back at Superstars continues on the WWE Vault and I’m certainly fine with that. It’s the former big weekly show and that means things might actually happen around here. I had fun doing a show from about a month after this one and it could be interesting to see what happens on this episode too. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Vince McMahon is on his own to start as Mr. Perfect has to be in Ric Flair’s corner as Flair tries to get back on track after losing the WWF Title at Wrestlemania.

Here’s who to expect on the show.

Ric Flair vs. Ron Cumberledge

Feeling out process to start with Flair backing him into the corner and slowly hammering away. Perfect calls Cumberledge “Savage”, with Vince correcting him because that’s something Vince would do. The Figure Four finishes fast at 2:13.

UPDATE!

We get a look at the concert in the park, featuring Sherri, Jimmy Hart, the Mounties and the Nasty Boys singing for charity. It’s as bad as you would expect. There was also a Wrestlemania Superstars Look A Like contest and…I’ve seen worse. We had a big reception, with Hulk Hogan bringing out his daughter and wife for a rare cameo. Finally, there was a brunch, which looks more like wrestlers just sitting around. This was actually rather cool and felt like the forerunner to Axxess.

British Bulldog vs. Kevin Kruger

Perfect joins commentary, thankfully getting us away from Vince doing a solo job. Bulldog armdrags him down a few times to start and hits a slam as Vince refers to Kruger as “the opposition”, likely not knowing his name. The delayed vertical suplex sets up the running powerslam to finish Kruger at 1:29.

You’ve got to want it! As in the WBF Bodystars. I don’t think many people wanted it.

Beverly Brothers vs. Erik Collins/Mike Freedom

The Genius is here with the Beverly Brothers. Beau beats on Freedom to start and we get an insert promo from the Beverlys, who dub the Legion Of Doom (and Paul Ellering) the Legion Of SISSIES. The jump onto the back hits Freedom and Beau calls him Animal (ala Mr. Perfect in the first match). The Shaker Heights Spike finishes at 1:48.

Post match Genius pours out some yellow paint so the Beverlys can do an LOD mockup on Collins. Actually make that LOS.

EVENT CENTER!

The Legion Of Doom is ready to wreck the Beverly Brothers.

The Repo Man can help the economy because he takes things from people so they don’t have to waste money paying for them. And he’ll be rich!

Crush is at a junk heap where he talks about his mom telling him to mind his manners as a kid. We see a black and white video of a child trying to pour milk but squeezing the carton too hard, sending the milk flying. Back in real life (and in color), Crush says he’s full grown, so who is going to teach him to mind his manners now?

Shawn Michaels vs. George Anderson

Sherri is here with Shawn, who hammers Anderson into the corner to start. A knockdown lets us hear from Bret Hart, who isn’t going to let Shawn tarnish the Intercontinental Title. The superkick connects (not really) and the Teardrop suplex finishes Anderson at 1:47.

EVENT CENTER TWO!

Texas Tornado knew there would be difficult challenges when he came here and gives a rather incoherent promo (I’m shocked) about how the two belts (or maybe one) are about honor and the dreams he is made of. Or something. I think.

The Nasty Boys want the Tag Team Titles back.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Brooklyn Brawler

Slaughter hammers away to start and leapfrogs him, much to Perfect’s shock. The insert promo sees Slaughter promising to make the Mountie an international maggot. Does that include official paperwork? A gutbuster into an elbow to the ribs sets up the Cobra Clutch to finish the Brawler at 1:39.

Sid Justice, with Harvey Wippleman, comes out to the platform for a chat. Justice is sick of the Ultimate Warrior and the Little Warriors because he is the man that everyone fears. Warrior tried to save Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania but who is saving the Warrior from Justice? No one can do it because Justice rules the world.

Shawn Michaels has left the building!

Natural Disasters vs. Kent Carlson/Tom Stone

Earthquake knocks Carlson down to start and powers him into the corner without much trouble. The big elbow to the back connects as we get an insert promo from Money Inc., with Jimmy Hart, bragging about retaining the Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania. A double splash in the corner to Carlson sets up a double splash in the corner to Carlson and Stone at the same time. The Earthquake into the big splash finishes Carlson at 2:30.

EVENT CENTER! WHERE THEY DON’T TALK ABOUT EVENTS!

Skinner is tired of having to prove himself and it’s time to beat people because he’s hungry.

Tatanka thanks everyone from the great spirits to the fans for their support. He wants to rise to the top and make his people proud again. Not a bad promo here.

Undertaker vs. Berzerker

Paul Bearer and Mr. Fuji are here too. Hold on though as Fuji steals the Urn and Berzerker hits Bearer with the shield. Berzerker hits Undertaker with the shield a few times and then hits him in the back with the sword (as you do). A stab sends the sword through the mat and Berzerker knocks Undertaker to the floor. Berzerker piledrives him on the exposed concrete and leaves, only for Undertaker to stalk him up the aisle.

Skinner is ready for the Ultimate Warrior on Superstars.

The Ultimate Warrior is ready for Skinner on Superstars.

Next week: an update on Undertaker! You mean the guy who got up and walked away? What kind of update do we need?

Overall Rating: C+. This is far from a good time for the promotion, but dang it’s fun to see how things can go with the company trying to find something that works. When you have things like Undertaker almost being stabbed and the LOD being called the LEGION OF SISSIES, you can tell they’re trying to find themselves. That’s what had to happen with Hogan stepping away though and it makes for a fascinating transitional period, which was just getting going.

Results
Ric Flair b. Ron Cumberledge – Figure Four
British Bulldog b. Kevin Kruger – Running powerslam
Beverly Brothers b. Erik Collins/Mike Freedom – Shaker Heights Spike to Collins
Shawn Michaels b. George Anderson – Teardrop suplex
Sgt. Slaughter b. Brooklyn Brawler – Cobra Clutch
Natural Disasters b. Kent Carlson/Tom Stone – Splash to Carlson

 

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March To Wrestlemania X: They Did A Great Job

March To Wrestlemania X
Date: March 13, 1994
Location: Liberty High School, Liberty, New York/Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Attendance: 1,600/Unknown
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Johnny Polo, Gorilla Monsoon, Stan Lane

It’s another one of these Wrestlemania preview specials and in this case that could be quite the improvement over last year. Wrestlemania X is one of those shows that receives almost universal praise so seeing how WWE got to their big night could be interesting. Or it could be a bunch of filler matches which don’t get us anywhere. Let’s get to it.

The hosts/commentators preview the show. Stan Lane thinks Jim Cornette might be up to something. That has to be so surreal for both of them.

Lex Luger vs. Jimmy Del Ray

Jim Cornette and Tom Prichard are here with Del Ray. Luger isn’t about to shake Del Ray’s hand and knocks him down a few times without much effort. A clothesline puts Del Ray down again as Polo keeps messing with a sound machine, much to McMahon’s annoyance. Luger misses a charge to the floor and gets slammed/stomped by Prichard.

Back in and Del Ray stomps in the corner, allowing Prichard to choke in the ropes for a bonus. The double arm crank goes on before Del Ray sends him into the corner for….well he pulls the bottom rope but I have no idea how that is supposed to hurt. Del Ray’s moonsault misses though and Luger makes the same generic comeback he always makes. Prichard gets decked and it’s a powerslam into the Rack to finish Del Ray at 8:38.

Rating: C-. Just a simple match here but Luger’s lack of charisma was on full display. There’s just nothing you can do when Luger is doing the same basic stuff he always does and it didn’t work here. It’s not a terrible match, but they did about all they could and it did not work.

Post match Luger calls out Yokozuna, who comes out for the staredown and then leaves.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Ben Jordan

Luna Vachon is here with Bigelow, who throws him around to start and grabs a neck crank. Jordan’s comeback is cut off with a Boss Man Slam (with the left arm for a weird visual). The headlock goes on and Bigelow wants the people to shut up. Jordan avoids a charge and slugs away, only to walk into a hot shot for the pin at 3:31.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here, with Bigelow running through Jordan, despite a few right hands here and there. Bigelow and Vachon were set for a mixed tag match against Doink and Dink so it wasn’t like they needed to be in any serious training. It’s better than not acknowledging the match, but not by much.

Video on Women’s Champion Alundra Blayze.

Vince and Polo talk about more than half of the 50 greatest pay per views of all time being WWF events. Well what were they really up against?

Tatanka is ready for Yokozuna, thanks to the power of his Little Squaws. Yeah that didn’t catch on.

Razor Ramon vs. Tony DeVito

Non-title. Razor powers him into the corner to start and gets in a mocking look, which was quite the trademark for him. DeVito gets powered into the corner and then taken down by the arm for some cranking. Razor hammers away in the corner and then hiptosses him back out, setting up the abdominal stretch with the raised leg for a bonus. The belly to back superplex sets up the Razor’s Edge for the pin at 4:09.

Rating: C. I can always go for a nice squash and that’s what we got here. Razor was on a roll at this point and was getting ready for his big showdown with Michaels in that whole ladder match thing. That’s more than enough to make for a big Wrestlemania match and you could feel the star power here, as he destroyed DeVito.

Polo brings out Owen Hart for a chat. Hart is tired of his brother Bret holding him down, though he has to talk over the WE WANT BRET chants. Hart knows that everything will change at Wrestlemania, because there is no law that says the older brother has to be better. As for tonight, he wants Crush to save just a bit of Bret so there are no excuses at Wrestlemania.

Little Richard is ready to do America The Beautiful at Wrestlemania.

Earthquake vs. The Executioner

The Executioner tries to go after him to start but gets knocked down. A rake to the eyes lets Executioner go up, but Earthquake launches him mask first to the mat in a painful looking crash. The powerslam into a big elbow into the Earthquake finishes at 1:52. Earthquake just felt out of place in 1994.

It’s time for the Wrestlemania Control Center and we talk about the celebrities rather than the actual matches. Thankfully we do get a recap of the WWF Title situation, complete with a bracket, which I’ll take over a triple threat match.

Jim Cornette is ready for Yokozuna to leave Wrestlemania as the WWF Champion, because of course Yokozuna can beat Lex Luger and Bret Hart will be coming in weakened. As for tonight, Tatanka is going to get crushed.

The rest of the card gets a quick look as well.

Bret Hart, being interviewed by Johnny Polo (that could be a fascinating discussion), is ready for at least Owen Hart, and whomever he faces for the WWF Title. Bret wears this leather jacket because he is the ring general and now he’s ready to face anyone. These two could have a great buddy cop comedy.

Bret Hart vs. Crush

Mr. Fuji is here with Crush. Hart’s waistlock doesn’t get him very far to start and it’s an early standoff. Crush wants a test of strength but Hart is a bit too intelligent for that. Then for some reason Hart does try it and is immediately taken down. Hart sends him out to the floor and then gets in an elbow to send Crush outside again.

We take a break and come back with Crush hitting a superkick and grabbing a choke on the mat. Back up and a whip into the corner has Hart in more trouble, setting up a cross armbreaker as Polo is CERTAIN that there is someone better than Hart. There has to be! Crush grabs a bearhug to keep him in trouble before Hart is sent outside again. Fuji’s cheap shot is cut off by the referee so Crush sends Hart into the steps for two instead.

A backbreaker gets two more and Crush poses, allowing Hart to roll him up for two of his own. The middle rope bulldog gives Hart two and the Russian legsweep leaves both of them down. Back up and Crush hits another backbreaker but a top rope knee misses. Fuji offers a distraction but Crush hits him by mistake, allowing Hart to make the real comeback. Cue Owen Hart to turn a small package over so Crush can steal the pin at 14:20.

Rating: B. This is what I love about these shows, as it came out of nowhere and wound up being a heck of a match. Who would expect Crush to have this kind of a match? Granted that’s part of the perk of facing Hart, who really can do something special with anyone. It shows you why people saw potential in Crush, who could have a good match if he was out there with the right opponent and wrestled the right style.

Rhonda Shear wants to see Lex Luger at Wrestlemania and will make time for it because she is the guest timekeeper. I feel dumber having listened to her talk.

Quebecers vs. ???/???

Non-title and the Quebecers are sent outside in a hurry to start. Back in (and after a hug), the Quebecers take over on one of the two, as Captain Lou Albano comes out to say he doesn’t like these tactics. Pierre backdrops Jacques into a backsplash for two and the slow beating continues. An Alabama Slam into a Boston crab/Fameasser combination finishes for Pierre at 4:06.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but that’s about what you would have to expect. I’m not sure why else was going to happen here, with the Quebecers on their way to a Tag Team Title match at Wrestlemania. I still like them as a heel team and they were one of the few bright spots in a terrible time for the division.

We get a sitdown interview with Randy Savage (it’s so bizarre to see him in a Raw shirt) and he promises to get his dignity back. He had Yokozuna beaten in his chance to become a three time WWF Champion but then Crush cost him. It should have been him going to Wrestlemania to face Bret Hart and Lex Luger, who he could beat. Savage has put in the work to get to that title shot and he wore Yokozuna out.

He’ll get to Crush and everything is cool, even with the divorce. He is a coiled spring though and it’s a good idea to not have him in the building tonight. Savage can’t go to Wrestlemania X as the WWF Champion but he is going to get his revenge on Crush. He’s guaranteeing that he’ll leave Wrestlemania with his dignity. This was INCREDIBLE and one of the best Savage promos I’ve ever seen. He was all business here and didn’t even have his sunglasses on. Outstanding stuff and HOW DID VINCE MCMAHON NOT SEE MONEY IN THIS GUY???

Tatanka vs. Yokozuna

Non-title and Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette are here too. Polo thinks Tatanka is so ugly that he sleeps with his face in the pillows to be kind to burglars. Yokozuna jumps Tatanka to start and some chops to the head don’t get Tatanka very far. The big elbow misses and so does the splash, allowing Tatanka to hit a high crossbody for two. A knee to the ribs cuts Tatanka down again and naturally we hit the nerve hold.

The comeback doesn’t work for Tatanka as he gets pulled back down and then sent outside. The turnbuckle pad is taken off and we take a break. Back with Yokozuna going to another nerve hold as Polo and his sound machine have Vince very, very annoyed. Granted hearing Polo say that “Tatanka put a ruler next to his bed to see how long he slept” is more entertaining than the second nerve hold.

Yokozuna runs him over again but Tatanka manages to send him into the exposed buckle. A ridiculously delayed cover gets two so it’s the top rope chop to give us the TIMBER fall from Yokozuna. For some reason Tatanka tries the Papoose To Go and gets crushed with a belly to belly for his troubles. The Banzai Drop (Polo:”WHOOMP THERE IT IS!”) finishes Tatanka at 9:22.

Rating: C. Yeah this was when you could see things going south for Yokozuna, as a lot of the speed and movement which made someone of his size that much more impressive, is gone. Instead it’s a lot of standing in place before hitting the big moves and then things like the nerve hold. That being said, seeing Tatanka take a pinfall loss is still weird, but dang how good would it have been if THIS was his first loss? How much more of a killer would that make Yokozuna look like going into Wrestlemania?

Wrestlemania ad, treating it like a Broadway feature. I’ve heard worse ideas.

Commentary makes their WWF Title predictions, with Polo actually predicting Bret Hart to win the whole thing.

We get Men On A Mission’s Wrestlemania Rap. I heard this over thirty years ago ago and I still remember the line “The mission is the titles and we will win but we’re all gonna rock Wrestlemania X.” This could not be more early 90s if it tried, making it awesome.

Overall Rating: B-. While some of the wrestling was hit and miss, I had a good time with this and want to see Wrestlemania more than I did coming in. The fact that I’ve seen Wrestlemania X more times than I can count and kind of want to see it again is quite the effective sign. That Savage interview was outstanding and the Hart vs. Crush match went well. Solid enough show here and it did its job.

 

 

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March To Wrestlemania IX: One Of The Craziest Things I Have Ever Heard

March To Wrestlemania IX
Date: March 28, 1993
Location: Cumberland County Civic Center, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

The title kind of speaks for itself here, as we have about a week to go before Wrestlemania and this is the big final push towards the biggest event of the year. The WWF did some specials like this back in the 90s and that means we could have an interesting selection of matches on the way to Las Vegas. Let’s get to it.

We look back at the contract signing between Bret Hart and Yokozuna, with Yokozuna crushing Hart, who got up anyway to a big reaction.

Vince and Bobby run down the card in front of a green screen.

Yokozuna vs. Randy Savage

Yokozuna has Mr. Fuji with him. They take their sweet time getting going here with no contact being made in the first two minutes. Savage ducks a few lockups before getting shoved down, leaving him thinking twice about this. Yokozuna hits a running shoulder and sends Savage flying over the top in a big heap. With Vince praising Yokozuna as much as he can, Savage gets knocked down again as the USA chants are on.

Yokozuna keeps hammering away as commentary basically says Bret Hart has no chance at Wrestlemania. Savage gets in some left hands but a single chop puts him back down. The big legdrop crushes Savage but the charge in the corner misses. A top rope ax handle puts Yokozuna on one knee but Fuji shoves Savage off the top. Yokozuna grabs a belly to belly suplex for the pin at 6:37.

Rating: C+. This was designed to set up Yokozuna as the monster who is beating a former WWF Champion and that worked well. Savage’s comeback at the end was only enough to give him a sliver of hope and that’s all it needed to be. Yokozuna is the monster of monsters at this point and it’s clear that the company is entirely behind him, as they should be here.

Post match Yokozuna goes for the Banzai Drop but misses and….leaves. Well that was kind of stupid.

We look at Lex Luger’s debut at the Royal Rumble, with Bobby Heenan’s insanely over the top praise still being hilarious/uncomfortable.

Mr. Perfect vs. Skinner

Skinner jumps him to start as Heenan is VERY happy with the idea of Perfect getting beaten up. Perfect gets tossed over the top and Skinner gets in a bite on the floor. Perfect manages a posting, only for Skinner to get in a belt shot to the throat. A whipping ensues, with the referee having no issue with the foreign object. Vince goes NUTS, screaming that Heenan or Luger paid Skinner off to soften Perfect up before Wrestlemania. You know, because Skinner is a totally clean cut star otherwise.

Perfect’s eyes are raked over the top rope as Vince is AGHAST at this BLATANT RULE BREAKING! Perfect gets in a single shot though and the comeback is on, with the right hands in the corner having Skinner in more trouble. The knee lift lets Perfect choke in the ropes, where Skinner gets in an alligator claw to the face. Not that it matters as Perfect hits the PerfectPlex for the pin at 5:27.

Rating: C+. This was a bit better than I was expecting here, with Skinner beating Perfect up until the comeback came through. It really does amaze me to see how easy Perfect can make things look out there, as it feels like he’s just waiting to turn it on and win in the end. That’s not a level of talent you see very often and it is more impressive every time.

Hulk Hogan is coming back at Wrestlemania. This was some over the top praise.

Kamala vs. Kim Chee

Before the match, Slick thanks the fans for their support for Kamala and promises that he is going to take out Bam Bam Bigelow at Wrestlemania. Not exactly as the match didn’t happen but it’s a nice sentiment. Kim Chee wants Kamala to walk back into the darkness but we cannot let that happen. Can Slick get a witness?

Anyway, Chee gets in Kamala’s face to start and seems to scare him, allowing Chee to hammer away in the corner. A slap to the face wakes Kamala up and he grabs a quickly broken bearhug. Kamala superkicks him down and the big splash, plus some coaching to turn Chee over, is enough for the pin at 2:11. That’s all it should have been.

Post match Kamala knocks him to the floor and steals the pith helmet.

We get a Wrestlemania music video in all of its 1993 glory, with various wrestlers giving some rather generic promos. That being said, this is the old Wrestlemania theme, with the OOOH OOOH, WRESTLEMANIA, PUMP IT UP PUMP IT UP (better known as Linda McMahon’s theme) so I can’t complain much. For some reason Big Boss Man, who wasn’t on Wrestlemania, gets two promos.

Vince and Bobby hype up the Mega Maniacs vs. Money Inc.

We look back at Money Inc. attacking Brutus Beefcake, resulting in the return of Hulk Hogan to set up a match which does not feel important in the slightest despite being the second biggest match on the card. I was a huge Brutus Beefcake fan when I was a kid but this return run never worked. Much like Hogan in the early days of Raw, which never felt right.

Money Inc. vs. Reno Riggins/Jerry Sabin

Non-title and Sabin is better known as the Italian Stallion, right down to his trunks saying ITALY. The beating starts fast with DiBiase taking Sabin to the floor and hammering away. Back in and a double back elbow drops Riggins, followed by a suplex to do it again. IRS drops an elbow and the Million Dollar Dream finishes at 2:54.

Here are the Mega Maniacs (obviously in a different arena) for a chat. Hogan talks about Money Inc. hitting Beefcake in the face with the metal briefcase and he knew it was bad. He chilled, he goosebumped and he sweated from head to toe. It was so bad that he ran to the garage and got on Brutus’ motorcycle (which just happened to be there) so he could ride to Venice Beach and bury his ear in the sand. He heard (in the sand) millions of Hulkamaniacs praying for Beefcake.

Then he rode the motorcycle for seven days to New York City, where he went to the Ramada Inn and found Beefcake watching the Three Stooges with an ice pack on his nose. Beefcake talks about going to Florida with Hogan, where they dropped rockets (yes rockets) on his new metal mask and there wasn’t a scratch on it. If Hogan did one more pushup, those Pythons would explode.

Jimmy Hart recommends not investing money in Money Inc., whereas the Mega Maniacs will have new t-shirts, Nintendo games and posters. When they win the Tag Team Titles, their stock will go through the roof. Hogan says Beefcake is mad, with Beefcake saying he spent two days running up and down the aisles at K-Mart to find hair tonic. Then he went to the desert around Las Vegas, where he chopped down some cactuses (should be cacti) and mountains (no word on if it was with the edge of his hand), where he decided he’ll take Money Inc.’s hair out of their heads with his bare hands.

Hogan says he went fishing with his bare hands and caught some sharks, but they weren’t for eating. Instead, he’s filled the pool at Caesar’s Palace with salt water for the hammerhead sharks (and some mermaids). Beefcake is going to help Hogan open the sharks’ mouths so they can wrap the Tag Team Titles around their teeth.

That way, when they throw the bathing beauties and Hulkamaniacs in the pool (with the sharks), the sharks can’t hurt a hair on their chinny chin chins (of the bathing beauties you see). Hogan has two cases of suntan lotion and he wants all the female Hulkamaniacs to have an even tan from head to toe. Catchphrase and posing ensues. If you haven’t seen this promo, go find it somewhere, as the Ultimate Warrior would have thought this was totally insane. And then it just KEPT GOING as they talk for the better part of ten minutes.

We look at Tatanka pinning Shawn Michaels a few times, earning an Intercontinental Title shot at Wrestlemania.

Michaels is ready to play Tatanka like people get played in the Las Vegas casinos.

Tatanka vs. George South

Tatanka takes him down without much trouble as Heenan is insisting that Shawn Michaels is NOT in jeopardy. All this does is make me wonder how Heenan would have done as Shawn’s manager. Tatanka takes him into the corner but South gets in a few shots of his own. A ram into the buckle sends Tatanka onto the war path as Heenan rants about how he DOES NOT CARE about Sherri being at Wrestlemania. Some chops set up the Papoose To Go to finish South at 2:29.

Post match Michaels comes out to gloat so Tatanka wants to fight. Nah.

It’s time for the Wrestlemania Control Center with Gene Okerlund, who feels out of place in the WWF in 1993. He hypes up the toga party (because that really was a selling point) and the double main event, with Bret Hart being tired of hearing that he has no chance. Yokozuna could lose a lot more than face at Wrestlemania.

Crush is on a boat in Hawaii and, in a rather odd accent, promises revenge on Doink at Wrestlemania. Then he dives into the water and gets some octopuses.

The Steiners are ready to beat up the Headshrinkers.

Beverly Brothers/Little Louie vs. Bushwhackers/Tiger Jackson

Jackson would go on to become Dink The Clown. After some stalling, Beau punches Luke down to start as Heenan wants to say something important. Vince asks for a drum roll before Heenan insists he will NOT be wearing a toga. Heenan: “Imagine Gorilla Monsoon in a toga. It’ll look like an unmade bed.” We get a four person bite chain until Luke threatens to beat up Louie. Instead Jackson dances and hits Louie with a dropkick.

A splash gets two, with Louie’s kickout sending Jackson into the referee’s arm. Said referee throws Jackson back onto Louie for two before they do the sequence all over again. Louie gets in a shot of his own and Butch comes in to yell at Blake but not actually hit him. Blake gets in a cheap shot and hammers away as we get a rare BUTCH chant. Butch works on the arm and we get a chase from Louie and Jackson.

Beau comes in off the top with an ax handle to take over on Luke and we get some assisted choking on the ropes. Another top rope ax handle connects and Louie gets in a slap from the apron. Luke gets over and brings in Butch to clean house, which isn’t exactly hard on the Beverly Brothers. Everything breaks down and Jackson hits a high crossbody for the pin on Louie at 9:57. Heenan: “I didn’t understand anything I just saw.”

Rating: D. What in the world was the point of that? None of these people are on Wrestlemania and they get almost ten minutes, or longer than any other match on the show. That’s such a weird way to go and it was nothing that you wouldn’t see on a house show. It felt like they had nothing else to use on the show and picked a random comedy match.

We look at Giant Gonzalez debuting and taking out the Undertaker.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Undertaker

Paul Bearer is here of course. Bigelow slugs away to start but Undertaker drop toeholds him down. The chase is on with Bigelow getting in a shot, only to get caught with a running DDT. Old School connects but Bigelow knocks him down again as we take a break. Back with Bigelow hammering away on the floor, giving us Undertaker’s stagger sell. A hard whip sends Undertaker knees first into the steps but he gets up.

Back in and a slam has Undertaker sitting up again, with Heenan wanting Giant Gonzalez to come out here and take care of Undertaker. Some elbows make Undertaker sit up again and Bigelow misses the top rope headbutt. The comeback is on with a chokeslam sending Bigelow outside and he walks out for the countout at 7:40.

Rating: C+. This could have been a lot worse as they had a story here with Bigelow’s big man offense not being able to keep him down. It gave you just enough drama about whether or not Bigelow could stop him before walking out. Not a great match, but it made me want to see them doing something else.

Post match Giant Gonzalez comes out for the staredown, with Undertaker slowly going towards him. Referees break it up.

Vince and Bobby (who insists he does NOT have a tail) give us a quick final Wrestlemania preview to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There’s a reason Wrestlemania IX is so poorly remembered and a two hour preview for the show isn’t the best thing to see. This was a way to get people hyped up for the show, but then you realize just what you’re getting into. Throw in the completely out there mixed tag and the all time weird Mega Maniacs promo and this didn’t work. The decent wrestling you get is nothing worth seeing and the whole thing is kind of a mess as a result.

 

 

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WWF Global Warfare: They Lost This One

Global Warfare
Date: 1993
Host: Jimmy Hart
Commentators: Jim Ross, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan

This is one of the Coliseum Videos released on the WWE Vault and I’m not sure what it’s going to be. It’s not the best time for the company as it’s in a transitional phase, with the New Generation coming in. That could go in a variety of ways and hopefully they don’t live down to this era’s reputation. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features bombs going off around the world as we seem to have a theme.

Jimmy Hart welcomes us to his home and says he’s excited about global warfare. That’s quite the odd statement to make. No one should know more about global warfare than him. That’s another quite the odd statement to make. Anyway, he talks about the theme songs (admitting he wrote them) of some of the wrestlers on the tape and brags about his music career. And now, to the first match.

From Sheffield, England, April 11, 1993.

Intercontinental Title: Crush vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is defending and this is from the UK Rampage 1993 show, which was only so good overall. Crush powers him around to start as the fans are already doing their deal with the horns, which can get rather annoying in a hurry. Some more power sends Michaels into the corner and Crush grabs him with a bearhug to take over again. A backbreaker has Michaels in more trouble but he wins a chase around the ring and hammers away.

Crush grabs a gorilla press slam and holds him there for WAY longer than should be done before sending Michaels outside. Back in and a knee to the back knocks Crush outside, where Michaels gets in a posting to really take over for the first time. A DDT gives Michaels two and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Crush blocks the superkick, setting up a legdrop…which sends Michaels bailing for the countout at 8:52.

Rating: C-. Yeah what else were they supposed to do here? Crush was on a roll and teasing getting the big Lex Luger push but you don’t want him to win the title. At the same time, it’s always a disappointing finish when someone just walks out, even if it makes sense for the options that they had available.

Post match Crush throws him back in for a beating, including the Head Vice. Crush holds up the belt like a moron, showing that he might have been perfect for the Luger push.

From Paris, France, April 8, 1993.

Yokozuna vs. Jim Duggan

Yokozuna, with Mr. Fuji, is less than a week after winning the WWF Title and losing it about a minute later. This is also singlet Duggan so you know it’s not going to be much to see. Duggan throws a chair inside and Yokozuna (in black for a weird but cool look) doesn’t really move. The right hands in the corner stagger Yokozuna a bit so Duggan grabs the 2×4, which is quickly taken away. Yokozuna chokes away on the ropes so Yokozuna comes back with more big right hands.

As usual, Yokozuna knows how to sell this stuff rather well and almost does the big fall before elbowing Duggan in the face. That sequence works so well that they just do it again, with Heenan suggesting that Duggan just hit Yokozuna in the face with the board. Instead he gets caught in a bearhug for a good while until Duggan bites his way out (Heenan: “THAT’LL WORK!”). Duggan avoids a charge into the corner and starts firing off the clotheslines to FINALLY knock him down. Fuji offers a distraction though and it’s a splash in the corner, setting up the Banzai Drop for the pin at 7:22.

Rating: C. It was basic and really simple with Duggan slugging away over and over, but dang he knows how to do that match rather well. There is something about Duggan that makes you want to see him knock a giant down. The match wasn’t good, but it was rather entertaining and that’s a good thing. At the same time, you could definitely see how much slimmer Yokozuna was here, with the tights clearly being padded to make him look bigger.

Hart is listening to music and professes his love of Coliseum Video. He also promises that Hulk Hogan will get the WWF Title back from Yokozuna. The other day, he and Hogan were in Boston and Hart wrote a new song using a Hulk pencil on a picture of Hogan. And yes, he’s wearing a Hogan shirt. Hart is nothing if not the biggest shill in wrestling history. Well one of them anyway.

From Barcelona, Spain, April 24, 1993.

Tag Team Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Money Inc.

The Steiners are challenging and can’t get in the ring as IRS holds them off with the briefcase. The ring announcer says that if the Steiners aren’t allowed in and the briefcase isn’t taken to the back, the titles change hands. That’s enough for the Steiners to come in and clean house without much trouble.

We settle down to DiBiase headlocking Rick to start as the camera is staying rather wide for some reason. That’s reversed into a belly to belly for two on DiBiase and it’s already off to Scott to go after the arm. The camera goes to a LONG crowd shot, with Savage and Heenan both getting on him for not showing the match. We get back to the ring with DiBiase getting over for the tag to IRS, whose arm is cranked as well.

Scott uses the tie to take IRS down again as we shift to a normal camera shot as I’m rather confused by the whole direction so far. Anyway DiBiase sends Scott outside for a ram into some metal, allowing IRS to drop an elbow for two back inside. Commentary gets on the camera work again, even if things are at least somewhat settled down. DiBiase chokes Scott on the ropes and IRS gets in some cheap shots like a villain should be doing.

Scott fights out of a chinlock but goes the wrong way, with DiBiase almost feeding him into the right corner. Rick comes back in to clean house as everything breaks down. DiBiase’s piledriver is cut off and Scott adds a middle rope clothesline. IRS gets sent outside and the Frankensteiner hits DiBiase, only for IRS to come back in and….I guess the word would be tap Scott with the title for the DQ at 10:18.

Rating: C. The camera work was the focal point of this match and that’s a weird way to go. The venue was strange looking enough so maybe that’s why the camera stuff was so odd. Other than that, it was a rather just kind of there match with neither team exactly doing much. Then again, a Frankensteiner from Scott is always worth a look.

Post match the Steiners hold up the titles, marking the second time we’ve done the “they don’t know the rules” in three matches. It takes way too long to get on to the next match.

From Sheffield, England, April 11, 1993.

Mr. Perfect vs. Samu

Afa is here with Samu. They take their time to start and Samu shoves Perfect away, meaning they stare at each other again. Perfect’s headlock and a shoulder have Samu in a bit of trouble and he misses a crossbody. A crossbody works a bit better for Perfect (he is perfect after all) and some dropkicks have Samu on the floor, with the fans rather behind Perfect.

Back in and they tease a test of strength until Samu knocks him down to take over for the first time. A toss to the floor lets Afa get in a cheap shot, which has Perfect going after him. Heenan: “Come on Perfect, didn’t I teach you better than that?” Samu gets in a shot of his own, only for Perfect to go after the leg. That doesn’t work either as Samu and Afa both get in their own shots as the slow beating continues.

Samu hits a superkick, some headbutts to the head and a headbutt between the legs. As dull as this match has been, the fans are indeed staying with it so far. Perfect finally fights up and kicks away, only to get hit fairly low to cut off the comeback. A small package gives Perfect two but Samu knocks him outside. Perfect manages a quick crotching on the post to no avail but has to avoid a top rope splash. The PerfectPlex finishes for Perfect at 13:36.

Rating: C-. Thank goodness the fans were there to carry this as far as it got, as there was only so much for the whole thing. Perfect was beaten up here by half of a tag team. What else were you going to expect out of this kind of a setup? It was a match for the sake of letting the fans see Mr. Perfect, but it wasn’t much for anyone outside of the arena.

Hart is listening to Crank It Up (dig that Young Stallions song) and then brags about doing the song for Bret Hart’s next match.

From Barcelona, Spain, April 24, 1993.

Bret Hart vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow powers him around to start and then runs Hart over with a shoulder. Back in and Hart starts in on the arm and drops a leg onto it, allowing commentary to talk about wrestlers taping up fake injuries to trick their opponents. Something close to an elbow sends Bigelow to the floor and Hart gets to pose, which isn’t his style most of the time. This time Bigelow gets smart and rams him into the post, followed by a second shot to keep Hart down.

Back in and Bigelow stomps away as Hart is clearly near total destruction. The bearhug goes on back inside, with Heenan thinking a spinebuster could work well here. Instead it’s a big belly to back suplex for two and it’s off to an over the shoulder backbreaker. Hart slips out and manages his own suplex, which has Heenan losing his mind over Hart pulling that off.

Bigelow is right back up with a nasty butterfly backbreaker, only to miss the top rope headbutt. Hart fights up and hits the usual, setting up a middle rope clothesline. The sharpshooter attempt is broken up so Bigelow tries a bearhug, which is broken up with a bite to the face. Another belly to back attempt is cut off though and Bigelow crashes onto Hart. Back up and a splash misses in the corner, allowing Hart to grab a victory roll for the victory at 11:55.

Rating: B. It might not have been their King Of The Ring final but Hart knows exactly how to do a match like this. As usual, Hart felt like he was getting close to death before pulling off the miracle win in the end. Good stuff here, as Bigelow could do the monster role rather well, especially with this kind of an opponent.

From Paris, France, April 8, 1993.

Crush vs. Doink The Clown

Wrestlemania rematch. Doink hides underneath the ring to start but gets caught coming back in to to start the beating early. Crush knocks him outside and the chase is on, with Doink’s stomps not having much effect back inside. There’s an atomic drop to make Doink gyrate a bit and a figure four necklock has Doink down even longer.

Crush hits a backbreaker but misses a knee, giving Doink a needed target. The knee is wrapped around the post and Doink slowly stomp away in the corner. Crush finally fights up and knocks him to the floor, setting up the head vice. Doink slips out though and walks away for the countout at 8:15.

Rating: D+. Another nothing match in a series of them. The idea of Doink was that he would play mind games and mess with people but here he was just having a boring match. Also, if you want Crush to be seen as a big deal, maybe don’t have his two matches on the same tape end with the same finish.

Jimmy Hart is impressed by all of the new technology and then talks about Shawn Michaels, who isn’t in the next match.

From Milan, Italy, April 25, 1993.

Scott Steiner vs. IRS

Neither of their partners are here for a change. IRS hides in the ropes to start, which might not be the worst idea. A battle of wrist control sends IRS to the ropes again before he does manage to get in a shot to the head. Steiner is sent outside as JR complains about not being able to find a chicken fried steak last night. Back in and a powerslam into a headlock has IRS in trouble for a change and he bails again as they’re not exactly getting into a higher gear so far.

Back in again and Steiner takes him down by the arm, only for IRS to go outside AGAIN. This time IRS gets back in and they run the ropes a bit until Steiner is sent outside, because Heaven forbid they keep anything going. A ram into the steps keeps Steiner in trouble but he gets his knees up to block a splash. IRS bails into the corner as commentary talks about how we don’t have timeouts here. BECAUSE THIS MATCH HAS BEEN SO ACTION PACKED! Steiner charges into a boot in the corner and gets two with his feet on the ropes. The referee waves that off and Steiner gets a sunset flip for the pin at 10:06.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t so much that it was a bad match but geez this was boring. IRS wasn’t exactly known for keeping the pace up and the stalling did make sense as he was trying to keep Steiner from getting to a higher gear, but that doesn’t make it fun to watch. This tape hasn’t been much to see thus far and this didn’t help at all.

From Milan, Italy, April 25, 1993.

Yokozuna vs. Undertaker

Mr. Fuji and Paul Bearer are here too. To say they stall for a good while here is an understatement, as Bearer takes nearly two minutes to get out of the ring. They stare each other down and Yokozuna’s shots to the head not doing much. The running DDT plants Yokozuna but he hits a clothesline to put Undertaker on the floor. A ram into the steps staggers Undertaker again and the big leg…does pretty much nothing back inside. Yokozuna hits a clothesline but Undertaker gets back up so it’s a bucket shot to Undertaker’s head for the DQ at 5:42.

Rating: D. Sweet goodness this the perfect way to wrap up this pretty terrible tape. They barely did anything, with over a third of the match being spent on them standing around and staring at each other before any contact. Then they just do another DQ, which is fine for the sake of not wanting Yokozuna to look weak, but GEEZ that’s a lot of non-finishes in one sitting.

Post match Yokozuna misses the Banzai Drop and gets “chokeslammed” (eh fair enough given the size) to send him running.

Hart gives us something of an inspirational message about never giving up and going for your dreams…and then praises Hulk Hogan, even posing to Real American to wrap it up.

Overall Rating: D. As usual, leave it to Hart to have the only good match on a terrible collection of wrestling. I know it’s the European tour so things aren’t going to be up to their usual standards, but sweet goodness this was dull. It’s not a good sign when the second best part of a collection is how odd the arena in Paris looked. Just lame stuff all around and it’s easy to see why 1993 is not the best time the company ever had.

 

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Smack Em Whack Em (2025 Edition): Two Firsts Of Many

Smack Em Whack Em
Date: 1993
Host: Lord Alfred Hayes, Bushwhackers
Commentators: Lord Alfred Hayes, Gorilla Monsoon

Ah here we go, as the WWE Vault continues to upload Coliseum Videos, though in this case we have one of the best ever released. There are some classic matches here with a major focus on Bret Hart, who was becoming the new star of the company now that the Hulk Hogan Era was mostly over. This should be a lot of fun so let’s get to it.

Lord Alfred Hayes welcomes us to a house that is needing to be renovated. The people fixing things up: the Bushwhackers, who wack in from off camera, naturally with their music playing. They have been hired to turn this place into the Bushwhackers’ Wrecking Room. The first thing we have to worry about is safety, so they give Hayes some safety glasses and a helmet. And a tool belt. And gloves. And now we’re off to the first match.

From Erie, Pennsylvania, November 23, 1992.

Crush vs. Berzerker

Crush starts fast by ducking a clothesline and hitting a belly to belly suplex. Berzerker is sent outside, followed by a flying shoulder to send him out there again. Back in and Berzerker hammers away, setting up a big boot to put Crush down for a change. This time it’s Crush getting knocked out to the floor, setting up a piledriver for two back inside. Crush’s arms get tied in the ropes so Berzerker kicks away, which wakes Crush up for some reason. A backbreaker and legdrop give Crush two and the head vice finishes Berzerker at 6:17.

Rating: C. They kept this short but it was a way to push Crush forward a bit more as his near mega push was on. You could see what the company saw in him as he had the look and style that had worked for them over the years. That being said, I’m not sure I could have seen him going all the way to the top. Beating monsters like Berzerker is a good way to go, but going beyond that might have been too far.

Back at the house and the Bushwhackers try to install a window but their measurements don’t quite work. Butch’s sledgehammer shots are a few feet low, but they think it’s fine because the dog can use the window.

From Dayton, Ohio, November 24, 1992.

Earthquake vs. Repo Man

Repo moves around to start but for some reason tries a waistlock. An elbow to the face knocks that away and Earthquake runs him over as commentary talks about owing debts on various things. The splash in the corner connects but Repo is back with some right hands and a middle rope clothesline actually puts Earthquake down. The neck crank doesn’t last long on Earthquake, who fights up but misses an elbow. Repo takes too long going up though and gets powerslammed, setting up the Earthquake for the pin at 4:24.

Rating: C-. Pretty much a nothing match here, as Repo was a weird choice to face a monster like Earthquake. At the same time, it’s a strange time for Earthquake, as the Natural Disasters were something of a lifeline to him. With Yokozuna coming in though, there wasn’t much of a place for Earthquake and that was becoming fairly obvious with something like this.

The Bushwhackers use a saw on the wood but say that their mother would be proud of them. Then they accidentally cut an electrical wire, but insist on safety first. Hayes is promptly electrocuted, and perhaps killed.

And now, eating for the single man with Yokozuna. He eats a lot and Gene Okerlund is impressed. This goes on for over ten minutes and it’s just him eating. They keep presenting more food to him and he eats it, with Gene trying some. I have no idea what the point of this is, but man he sure does eat a lot.

Now we get to something a lot more fun: a profile on new WWF Champion, Bret Hart. Gorilla Monsoon talks to Bret about some of the matches we’ll be seeing, including some newfangled thing called a ladder match. Bret even thinks that Shawn Michaels might have had secret ladder match experience.

From Portland, Maine, July 21, 1992.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn, with Sister Sherri, is challenging in the first ever (in the WWF at least) ladder match. After the belt is hung, Shawn starts hammering away but gets dropped with a quick clothesline. Bret comes back with some right hands and the always good looking headbutt but Shawn punches him down for a change. As Monsoon LOSES IT over Sherri having a tattoo on her chest, Shawn gets in a knee to the ribs for another knockdown.

That’s enough for the first ladder to be brought in but Bret cuts him off (starting a bit of a weird tradition in ladder matches of NO, I’M BRINGING THE LADDER IN FIRST) and hammers away on the floor. That means it’s time for Sherri to offer a distraction, allowing Shawn to set the ladder up inside. Bret cuts it off again but Shawn cuts him off just as quickly, with the ladder falling down.

Shawn rams the ladder into the ribs but eventually hits the post, forcing him to leave the ladder in the corner. Another knockdown lets Shawn go up and he touches the belt, only to be knocked back down with the ladder falling on him for a nasty crash. This time it’s Shawn knocking Bret off the ladder as the crashes continue to mount up. Bret knocks him off the ladder for no crash, but the ladder being put into the corner can’t go well. The middle rope clothesline puts Shawn down before slingshotting him into the ladder.

It’s too early to get the title though and Bret comes down, possibly twisting his knee in the process. A double down gives them a breather and Sherri is absolutely losing her mind. They both go up and then come crashing down so Sherri grabs Bret’s foot. That lets Shawn hit the superkick and the teardrop suplex before doing the really slow climb. Bret dropkicks the ladder over, sending Shawn crashing hard out to the floor. That’s finally enough for Bret to retain the title at 13:46.

Rating: B. The thing to remember here is that this was the first ladder match in WWF history. No it doesn’t have a bunch of huge spots or really anything else, but it’s not that kind of a match. Instead, this was a match which happened to have a ladder involved rather than a match focusing on a ladder. It helps that Bret and Shawn have great chemistry, which was on display here as they worked the ladder in very well. Good match and it’s a shame that it is so forgotten.

Gorilla talks about Bret defending the title so frequently. This includes a title defense against Kamala, when he was still all evil. Bret knew he had to be a fighting champion and that’s what he was going to do.

From Louisville, Kentucky, October 28, 1992.

WWF Title: Bret Hart vs. Kamala

Kamala, with Kim Chee and Harvey Wippleman, is challenging. Bret gives his glasses away as usual before ducking a lockup attempt as we’re over a minute in already. A waistlock doesn’t go so well for Bret as he gets taken into the corner, only to avoid a splash. Another missed charge lets Bret start in on the arm but he has to avoid some falling chops. Kamala has to go to the ropes (with his managers telling him to do it, then telling him he needs to let it go) before offering a test of strength.

Bret (eventually) tries it for some reason but catches the cheap shot, steps on the bare foot, and goes back to the arm. Kamala chops him down though and we hit the bearhug. For some reason that’s dropped in a hurry so Kamala can grab the pectoral claw. That’s broken up and Kamala actually leapfrogs him (COMPLETELY no sold by commentary) but Bret is back with a Russian legsweep. The middle rope clothesline into the middle rope elbow but the managers break up the Sharpshooter attempt. Instead Bret just rolls him up to retain at 8:50.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches that shouldn’t have been very good but Bret did what he could to make it work. There was only so much that could be done with someone like Kamala, who was only going to do much. Nice stuff here, with Bret getting a defense against a rather scary looking monster, which often works.

Post match Kamala and the managers go after Bret again but he pulls Wippleman in the way of the splash and clears the ring.

Gorilla and Bret preview the title match against Ric Flair, with Bret saying this was his one chance to get the title and he was winning no matter what. He even sprains his ankle and dislocates a finger early on but kept going anyway. It’s rare to see them giving away the result early but it’s kind of a huge deal.

From Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada, October 12, 1992.

WWF Title: Bret Hart vs. Ric Flair

Flair, with Mr. Perfect, is defending. Commentary makes a big deal about this being the hometown of Bret’s father Stu, just in case this wasn’t a big enough moment. Flair backs him into the corner to start and we get a clean break, plus a WOO for good measure. A headlock to the mat has Bret down but he reverses into a hammerlock, which gets a nice reaction.

Back up and Flair backs him into the corner for a chop as commentary talks about how good a match between Bret and Mr. Perfect would be. You know, like when Bret beat him for the Intercontinental Title and it was great? The threat of a Sharpshooter sends Flair outside and it’s a headlock to slow him down back inside. Bret wins the fight over a top wristlock as they’re firmly in first gear. A wristlock into a hammerlock keeps Flair down but he’s able to punch his way out of a sunset flip attempt.

Bret’s second sunset flip attempt results in Flair’s trunks coming down (of course) so Flair goes to the eyes to calm things down. Bret gets in a shot of his own but it’s way too early to get a Figure Four on Flair. Instead Bret drops some elbows on the leg (Flair: “OH GOD! NO!”) and now the Figure Four can work. After some quick two counts, Flair makes it over to the ropes for the break.

Bret gets two off a backslide before grabbing a sleeper. That’s countered with a belly to back though and they’re both down again. Flair goes after the leg as well and we’re quickly into the Figure Four, which lasts for a good while. Bret finally turns it over so Flair chops away in the corner and kicks away at the leg even more.

Another Figure Four attempt is countered into a small package for two but he charges into a boot in the corner. As usual, Flair goes up and gets slammed back down, allowing Bret to grab the Russian legsweep for two. The middle rope elbow and a suplex get two each, followed by a superplex. Bret grabs the Sharpshooter, keeps it on as Perfect gets on the apron, and makes Flair give up for the title at 26:28.

Rating: A-. This was as big of a shocker as you could get as Bret was a strong star but the idea of him winning the title was out of nowhere. It was great to see and came at the end of a very good match, which saw the crowd hanging in there for every second. Bret survived everything that Flair threw at him and then beat him clean with his finisher, which is (albeit about twenty minutes longer) about the same thing that Hulk Hogan did to the Iron Sheik. Heck of a moment here, and it more than holds up. Flair was finishing up and had an ear issue as well, so everything kind of came together and it went about as well as possible.

Gorilla praises Bret, who is ready to be a fighting champion.

We go back to the house (oh yeah that’s a thing), where it’s time to work on the plumbing. Naturally it’s safety first, but then it’ll be time to build a Bushwhackers bathroom. Luke uses a wrench on a pipe and Hayes is quickly soaked. We’ll get away from this too.

From Beaumont, Texas, January 4, 1993.

Undertaker vs. Razor Ramon

Ramon isn’t sure what to do with Undertaker to start so he slugs away, which goes about as well as you would expect. Undertaker comes back but misses the elbow, allowing Ramon to clothesline him to the floor. That earns Ramon a necksnap across the top rope but he’s fine enough to hit a middle rope bulldog to really stagger Undertaker for a change.

A chair to the back and a whip into the steps have Undertaker in more trouble and they head back inside. Ramon drops about ten straight elbows, which have Paul Bearer trying to get in for the save. Ramon takes the Urn and clocks Undertaker, who pops up at two and hits a chokeslam. That’s enough for Ramon to run off for the countout at 7:30.

Rating: D+. I didn’t like it when they did almost the exact same match (with an identical finishing sequence, even down to the elbows) on Invasion Of The Bodyslammers so this wasn’t much to see. It’s a weird way to go as a final match on the tape after all of the Hart stuff, but this was just disappointing, to the point where I was checking the other tape to make sure it just wasn’t the same match with new commentary. It really shouldn’t be that hard.

Back at the house, the Bushwhackers have a chair set up for Hayes so he can watch his favorite Coliseum Videos at the end of a hard day. This oddly works and Hayes wraps it up. Then the lights go out and the Bushwhackers say OH NO to end the tape.

Overall Rating: B. Why yes, a match with a big focus on Bret Hart as he’s becoming the top hero in the company is worth a look, as the two good matches are REALLY good, with the title change being great. That being said, there isn’t much else to see here, with the main event being flat out lame given that they did pretty much the same match just a few months earlier on another tape. Throw in the Bushwhackers stuff just not being funny and the whole thing was up and down, but dang those ups are worth your time.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – January 11, 1993 (Debut Episode, 2025 Edition): He Never Shuts Up

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Randy Savage, Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett

So you might have seen this one before, as it is the premiere episode of the series as part of the celebration of the move over to Netflix. I’ve seen this one more than a few times but to call it historic would be an understatement, even if it might not have felt that way at the time. Let’s get to it.

Sean Mooney is outside and welcomes us to the show. Bobby Heenan tries to get inside but is told he’s been replaced by Rob Bartlett. There are no tickets left and he’s not getting in through the press entrance so yelling ensues.

Opening sequence.

Commentary runs down the card and Bartlett is already not funny.

Yokozuna vs. Koko B. Ware

Bartlett goes straight to the fat jokes, including saying Yokozuna has an “a** like amphitheater”. Ware gets shoved down a few times so he tries to get the fans behind him with the rhythmic clapping. That doesn’t work either, which shouldn’t be a major shock. The running shoulders have Ware bouncing off of Yokozuna and the big leg connects. Yokozuna crushes him in the corner and hits the Banzai Drop for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: C-. This was more the answer to a trivia question than anything else, with Yokozuna still being new around here and getting to destroy someone in the first match ever on Raw. There isn’t much to say about it either, as Ware was more known for his large pants at this point than anything else. Nothing match, and Bartlett’s jokes made it that much worse.

Bobby Heenan is very excited about Narcissus (Lex Luger, later named the Narcissist). Mr. Perfect is scared of the Narcissus, who will be debuted at the Royal Rumble.

Steiner Brothers vs. Executioners

Scott hammers on #1 to start before handing it off to Rick for more of the same. #1 is sent into the corner as Doink The Clown is walking through the fans. Rick sends #1 into the post and grabs a belly to belly. Scott hits another one and the Steiner Bulldog finishes at 2:59. Total destruction.

Bobby Heenan, in drag, can’t get inside. Where did he get that costume?

Here is Razor Ramon for an interview with Vince McMahon. He’s ready to get the WWF Title from Bret Hart at the Royal Rumble and will win the title way faster than Bret ever did. We see a clip of Razor attacking Owen Hart on WWF Mania and now it’s time for him to take the title from Bret. Simple and to the point here, even if the title match was nothing memorable.

There is a Headlock On Hunger show coming up and Randy Savage doesn’t seem to have the card in front of him in a weird bit.

Tatanka is ready for the Headlock On Hunger.

Intercontinental Title: Max Moon vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is defending. Feeling out process to start as Bartlett makes an unfunny joke about a WWF version of an upcoming movie. Moon starts jumping over him and takes Michaels down with a jumping hammerlock to take over. We take a break and come back with Bartlett talking about Michaels pulling a knife during the break. Michaels drops him throat first across the top rope…and Doink walks out again as Bartlett “calls in” as Mike Tyson.

Michaels hammers away as the Tyson thing finally wraps up and we hit the chinlock. Moon fights up and sends him to the floor for a seated senton off the apron. Back in and the Tyson bit goes on again as Bartlett somehow does not get that it’s dying out there. Michaels hits the superkick and teardrop superkick to retain at 11:23.

Rating: C. This is a rare care where the match was fine but my goodness commentary dragged it WAY down. There was nothing funny about this and while I’m sure the Tyson impression made Vince laugh, it was distracting and another level of terrible. The match was ok, but no one watching was going to be able to focus on it because of the Tyson nonsense. Stop doing that.

Ad for WWF Mania. I could go for seeing some of that just for the flashbacks.

We get the Royal Rumble Report, with a focus on Shawn Michaels vs. Marty Jannetty. Michaels isn’t sure why Jannetty is getting a title shot, but Jannetty implies that Sherri will turn on Michaels during the match. That’s pretty much the story, with the Rockers not being mentioned.

Mr. Perfect is ready to win the Royal Rumble.

Mr. Fuji, with Yokozuna, is ready to crush everyone.

Jim Duggan isn’t sure if he’ll win, but he’ll give it all he’s got. Him winning the match a mere five years ago isn’t mentioned.

People are trying to get tickets for next week. Bobby Heenan’s beard disguise doesn’t work. Maybe he’ll try the roof.

We look at Kamala’s face turn over the weekend, as Reverend Slick convinces him to stand up to Harvey Wippleman and Kim Chee. If you need help standing up to those two goons, you’re already a lost cause.

Undertaker vs. Damian Demento

Undertaker starts fast and knocks him down, setting up Old School. Demento gets a boot up in the corner and hits a running shoulder to put Undertaker down again. That’s shrugged off and the Tombstone finishes Demento at 2:25.

Next week in a cage match: Woody Allen vs. Mia Farrow. I have no idea who this is supposed to appeal to but….no.

Doink The Clown isn’t scared of Crush, who comes out for a chase.

Heenan is allowed in as the show ends.

Overall Rating: C-. This is one of those shows where it is far more historic than memorable on its own. I’ve seen it a bunch of times over the years and there really isn’t anything that great on the whole thing. The wrestling is average at best and nothing on here makes you think it’s a special show.

At the same time, Bartlett is an absolute miss here and dragged the show WAY down. Now, that being said, I have seen a comment from Bartlett, who basically said he knew he was terrible in the role, but as a comedian, you can’t turn down a live mic on national television. Fair enough, but man alive did it not work. Overall, not a particularly good show, but that’s absolutely not the point here. This was about “this is the beginning” and that would be a huge understatement.

 

 

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Paul Bearer’s Hits From The Crypt (2025 Edition): WOW This Was Terrible

Paul Bearer’s Hits From The Crypt
Host: Paul Bearer
Commentators: Stan Lane, Gorilla Monsoon, Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Johnny Polo

Sometimes you need some good old fashioned Coliseum Video and…well this is from around 1994 and that’s not going to be the top shelf stuff. In this case, we should at last have some good stuff in there. I’ve done this tape before but it’s been a good many years and who am I to question the WWE Vault? Let’s get to it.

Paul Bearer welcomes us from the crypt and talks about the THOUSANDS of matches he’s gone through to pick the following.

From Syracuse, New York, April 12, 1994.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Lex Luger

Feeling out process to start as commentary goes on a bit of a weird rant about Jerry Jarrett (Jeff’s father) having a big mouth and running back to the south. Luger grabs a headlock to start so Jarrett complains about a hair pull, which commentary does not like. Jarrett’s shoulders to the ribs in the corner just seem to annoy Luger so Jarrett goes with some arm cranking.

That just earns him a gorilla press and the fans approve, but then Luger just strolls around the ring, as tends to be his case. A clothesline out of the corner gives Jarrett a breather and commentary is on him about wasting time, ignoring Luger being far worse about it just a few seconds earlier. Some ax handles to the back keep Luger in trouble as commentary calls out Luger for his lack of fire. Dang you can hear the burial building and it’s only going to get worse. Lane: “Lex could be sick, he could be injured. He could be coming off a European tour and be tired!”

The sleeper goes on and Luger has to fight up after two arm drops. Luger powers up and gets a suplex before starting the generic comeback. A few clotheslines and an elbow into a powerslam (Monsoon: “Not all that well executed by Lex.”) sets up the Rebel Rack to finish Jarrett at 13:13.

Rating: D+. Luger might as well have been reaching out for the paycheck that was keeping him going at this point as there was NOTHING here that would make you want to see him again. It was the most generic offense (as always) and absolutely no fire at all, with commentary coming close to burying him. It’s no shock that he was more or less done as anything important, as this was a cross between dull and embarrassing to watch.

From Springfield, Massachusetts, February 2, 1994.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels with Diesel, is challenging and takes his time to start. They shove each other a bit before Ramon throws the toothpick into his face to really get things going. Michaels bails out to the floor for a chase before running the ropes back inside as we’re over two minutes in without any major contact. A leapfrog doesn’t quite work for Michaels though and Razor gets in a powerslam for two.

Michaels’ neckbreaker gives him two of his own but Razor punches his way out of a sunset flip, setting up the big clothesline to the floor. They go outside where Razor pulls the floor padding back but a Razor’s Edge on the floor is broken up, allowing Michaels to get in a hard posting. That slows things down a good bit and a slam on the exposed concrete has Razor’s back in trouble.

Back in and Shawn starts in on said back, including a top rope ax handle and a chinlock with a knee between the shoulders. That’s switched into a regular chinlock until Razor fights up, only to have his back give out on a backslide. The chinlock goes back on and Monsoon goes into an anatomy rant that has to be him showing off. Said chinlock lasts a rather long time until Razor fights up and hits a big running knee.

A backdrop sends Michaels flying but Razor’s back gives out to leave them both down again. Razor starts hammering but Diesel pulls him outside with Michaels joining in for the double countout at 11:28. Hold on though as Razor grabs the mic and says let’s see who the real champion is. Michaels eventually comes back in but Diesel’s distraction doesn’t work, allowing Razor to punch Michaels out of the air for two. The belly to back superplex is broken up and Michaels hits a nice superkick for two.

Back up and the referee gets bumped, meaning there is no one to count after the Razor’s Edge. Diesel comes in with a belt shot but the referee is still down. After a delay so long that it had to be mistimed, the referee gets up for two as Marty Jannetty runs in for the save. Somehow that isn’t a DQ so Diesel misses a shot at Marty and hits Michaels by mistake, allowing Razor to get a rollup pin at 18:54.

Rating: B-. This was a weird one, as you would think that a nearly 20 minute Razor vs. Michaels match would be a layup, but they tried to pack a lot into the end while not doing much for long stretches earlier on. The chinlock went on WAY too long and they had to lay around for a good while at the end, likely due to Marty being late. If you cut about five minutes out of this, it’s far better, though I kept waiting on one of them to grab a ladder as those matches are so much more famous.

Bearer takes us to a dressing room which was used by people like WC Fields and Harry Houdini. Ok then.

From Syracuse, New York on April 12, 1994.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Mabel

Luna Vachon and Oscar are here too as I wonder what I did so wrong to wind up here. Bigelow jumps him to start and nearly knocks the….whatever it is that he’s wearing. Mabel is back with an elbow, only to miss an elbow drop. An armdrag of all things takes Bigelow down and Mabel grabs an armbar as it’s already time for a breather. The armbar goes to the mat before Mabel manages a suplex, only to miss a splash.

Bigelow enziguris him to the floor where Oscar runs away from Luna (smart man). Commentary compares Mabel’s hair to Bigelow’s tattoos as Mabel slowly gets back inside. Bigelow grabs an armbar as Monsoon says that it’s hard to see where one ends and where the other starts. No Gorilla, it really isn’t.

An armdrag into another armbar has Mabel down as Lane is mocking Luna’s facial tattoos. Mabel fights up and gets in an armdrag, followed by a not so great dropkick. The spinwheel kick (it didn’t get much air) sets up a splash to Bigelow in the corner, only for him to break up a bulldog as this keeps going. A better than expected Cactus Clothesline leaves them on the floor and a rather fast ten count is a double countout at 8:32.

Rating: D. Oh like this was ever going to be good. Bigelow was trying here but there is only so much you can do with someone Mabel’s size. It was slow and very plodding with a lot of laying around in between the moves that didn’t go well. The WWF LOVES this kind of match though and I can see why live fans would have some fun with it, but dang it does not exactly hold up well.

Bearer says we’ve all been following the Headshrinkers vs. the Quebecers but he recaps it for us anyway.

From Burlington, Vermont on April 26, 1994 and actually from the May 2 Raw.

Tag Team Titles: Quebecers vs. Headshrinkers

The Quebecers, with Johnny Polo, are defending. Fatu and Pierre start things off as Vince thinks there are some Quebecers fans around here because we’re so close to Canada. They shove each other around to start with Fatu being rather excited. Fatu runs him over and it’s off to Jacques vs. Samu and a rake of the eyes lets the villain take over. Everything breaks down and the Quebecers are knocked outside, which is enough for them to walk out.

That’s enough for the referee to say get back in here or it’s a title change. The Quebecers do run back in, break the count, and then head outside again and we take a break. Back with Pierre getting knocked around as Savage seems to want a sandwich. Jacques gets in a knee from the apron to take over and the big clothesline turns Fatu inside out. A ram into the steps has Fatu in trouble and it’s a clothesline/legsweep combination for two. Jacques backdrops Pierre onto Fatu for two more and we’re clipped to Fatu managing a backdrop over the top.

Naturally that means it’s time to put the camera on the commentators, with the tag back to Samu bringing us back to the ring. That’s cut off in a hurry though as Samu’s head gets caught in the ropes to slow him down. A piledriver puts Samu down but the top rope Cannonball misses. Polo tries to get up but gets dropped by Afa and Captain Lou Albano. Jacques accidentally decks Pierre, who hits him right back. The double Stroke into the Superfly Splash gives Fatu the pin and the titles at 19:30.

Rating: C-. I was always a Headshrinkers fan but this didn’t work out very well. Other than Pierre getting some crazy height on the Cannonball, there wasn’t much to be seen here. It was just a kind of dull match, though seeing a title change on a tape like this is a cool bonus. Just have a better match next time.

From Poughkeepsie, New York on March 21, 1994, from the April 4 Raw.

Adam Bomb vs. Earthquake

Wrestlemania X rematch with Earthquake powering him out of the ring to start. Bomb misses a big swing and gets clotheslined back down for his efforts. Another knockdown works for Bomb and an elbow gets two. Earthquake does his best Andre impression by being tied up in the ropes but we pause for Howard Finkel to stare Harvey Wippleman down. Bomb misses another elbow but so does Earthquake. A top rope clothesline gives Bomb two but Earthquake hits a nice belly to belly. Another elbow (geez) and legdrop set up the Earthquake from Earthquake for the pin at 4:21.

Rating: D+. Well that was a lot of missed elbows. Seriously there were probably five of them missing in a match that wasn’t even five minutes long. It isn’t a good sign when the match is this long and somehow worse than their really short match at Wrestlemania. Also, Earthquake winning again in 1994 is bizarre to see.

Bearer has apparently been in a theater and recaps what we have been seeing. He could be completely cut out of this and nothing would be lost. And he’s not even in a crypt!

From Utica, New York on April 11, 1994 on the April 18, 1994 Raw.

Bret Hart vs. Kwang

Hart’s WWF Title isn’t on the line. Kwang hammers away to start and kicks Hart in the face before spraying the green mist into the air (not slime Vince). Hart fights up and takes over onto the arm, including some armdrags into an armbar. That’s broken up and Hart is sent outside as we take a break.

Back with Kwang hitting a running spinwheel kick in the corner and getting two off a snapmare (yes a snapmare). The nerve hold goes on as Owen Hart calls in, with Bret fighting up and hitting a quick crossbody. Owen calmly talks about how he’s going to beat Bret in a Wrestlemania rematch as Bret fights back and hits a few Moves Of Doom. The Sharpshooter finishes Kwang off at 10:18.

Rating: C. Well that was short and to the point. This was little more than a reason to have Owen call in and to get Bret on the tape. That makes for a weird moment though as this was about setting up an upcoming Raw match, which you wouldn’t be able to see if you were watching the tape later. It doesn’t help that it was a nothing match with Kwang not being much of a challenge in any way.

From Rochester, New York on April 13, 1994.

Quebecers/Jeff Jarrett vs. Men On A Mission/Doink The Clown

Monsoon forgets that Ray Rougeau has retired and it’s Doink dropping a right hand on Jacques to start. Jarrett gets in a cheap shot from the apron and comes in to stomp away as commentary points out that the Quebecers’ titles aren’t on the line. You couldn’t put this match before the title change on the same tape? Mo comes in to trade shoulders with Pierre, who easily takes over with a big running shoulder (that looked good), only to charge into a spinebuster.

Doink comes in but gets stomped down as the alternating beating begins. A big toss sends Doink throat first onto the top rope and Pierre gets backdropped onto him for two. Jarrett’s dropkick in the corner sets up more choking and Doink is about to lose his hair. Monsoon: “HEY DOINK! GET OUT!” A sunset flip gives Doink one and he is immediately stomped right back down.

Doink finally gets a boot up to knock Pierre away and the tag…well it should bring in Mable as the referee didn’t see it despite looking right at them. Monsoon is calling for Mabel to come in and drag Doink to the right corner as Jacques gets two off a piledriver. Doink gets up and brings in Mabel to clean house without much effort. A clothesline sets up the double splash to pin Jacques 11:33.

Rating: D+. This tape is getting to the point of horrible with one dull match after another. Here we had Doink getting beaten up for a good while, with Monsoon getting annoyed at the whole thing (and forgetting who was Mo and who was Oscar). Mabel was the big wrecking ball at the end but it was a really dull path to get there.

Paul Bearer talks about going to the theater with Undertaker on cold nights.

From Springfield, Massachusetts on February 2, 1994.

Lex Luger/Randy Savage vs. Yokozuna/Crush

Savage is banged up but Monsoon insists that he was going to wrestle after putting his “John Henry” on the contract. Luger and Yokozuna start things off with Yokozuna punching him down. Some running clotheslines rock Yokozuna but he drops Luger with a single clothesline. Savage comes in to work on the arm and the good guys change without a tag when Crush tries to cheat.

Yokozuna pulls Luger over to the corner for the tag to Crush, who takes over rather quickly. It’s already back to Savage, who gets distracted by Mr. Fuji and beaten down into the corner as things slow back down. Crush grabs a bodyscissors as this couldn’t be more of a “yeah we’re doing the match, don’t expect anything else” match if it tried, because they aren’t exactly doing so.

Yokozuna comes in for the nerve hold (with his back to the camera because this wasn’t a TV match. The big charge misses in the corner and Savage…well eventually goes towards the right corner but takes so long that Crush cuts him off. Crush goes up top but misses a….I think we’ll say knee, allowing the tag off to Luger. That’s cut off almost immediately but Savage gets in a salt bucket shot to Crush for the pin at 12:21. Yeah what a hero.

Rating: D. Oh sweet goodness this was lame as CRUSH was probably working the hardest here. No one cared in the slightest out there and the match just came and went. I know it’s the last match of the night and the fans are ready to go home, but sweet goodness, a bit of effort should not be too much to ask. Horrible stuff.

Bearer sets up the main event, thank goodness.

From Springfield, Massachusetts on November 30, 1993.

Undertaker vs. Crush

Crush doesn’t even get an entrance here to show you how important this is. Commentary makes impotence jokes as we get a staredown to start. Crush hammers away but gets caught with a running DDT as the pace is already slowing. An elbow drop misses and it’s a clothesline to put Undertaker on the floor, only for him to grab the Stunner over the top.

Old School connects before Undertaker misses the jumping clothesline (that looked weird). Crush superkicks him outside as Johnny Polo wants to know the difference between a thrust kick and a crescent kick. Some chair shots put Undertaker down and the slow strikes ensue. A ram into the corner wakes Undertaker up for some reason but Crush cuts him off with a backbreaker.

The posing lets Undertaker sit up, with Polo freaking out because it takes so long for Undertaker to sit up that you can pin him. Crush does some military presses (geez) and drops a leg but Undertaker sits up again. For some reason Crush tries a Tombstone, which is reversed into the real thing to give Undertaker the win at 7:02.

Rating: C-. First and foremost: Johnny Polo came as close to saving this as he was HILARIOUS, with the running gag about covering Undertaker before the situp being great stuff and seemingly accurate. Other than that, they didn’t do much here but Crush’s military presses were impressive and Undertaker can do some good things with just about anyone. Somehow this was a better match than almost anything on the tape, which shows you just how bad things are going here. It wasn’t a great or even good match, but at least it was a nicer (on a sliding scale) way to end things.

Bearer wraps it up.

Overall Rating: D-. When Kwang is in the second best match out of two hours, there is not much wroth seeing on this stupid tape. This was one of the worst releases I’ve ever seen from Coliseum Video as there was no reason for it to be this bad. You could see how bad things were for the WWF around this time and egads this was a perfect showcase of why. Bad wrestling, few stars to get behind and just….what was supposed to be good here? Absolutely awful stuff.

 

 

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