Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2000 (2013 Redo): An All Time Masterpiece

Royal Rumble 2000
Date: January 23, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,231
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

After sitting through 1998 and 1999, this is my reward. What we have here might be the best Rumble show of them all with one of the best matches ever and a great Rumble on top of it. 2000 is the best in ring year the company ever had and this was a great way to kick that year off. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Cactus Jack challenging HHH for the world title in a street fight. This is that “one of the best matches ever” that I was talking about. The idea is simple: Cactus wants the title back and he’s facing HHH in a street fight, which means HHH is in WAY over his head. We’re in Foley’s hometown in Foley’s match with Foley’s most hardcore character. How can this not be a masterpiece?

Kurt Angle vs. ???

Angle is undefeated at this point. Kurt says he’s a real winner here, unlike the New York Knicks. This is goofy Kurt, which means he’s hilarious. He says that the mystery opponent must be scared to come face him, but the opponent needs to take a deep breath, come out here, and face Angle like a man. The self-help thing here is hilarious. The fans chant WE WANT TAZ….and here he is!

Kurt Angle vs. Tazz

Tazz pounds away on Angle and hits a HUGE backdrop to send him to the floor. Angle escapes a suplex in the aisle (painted like a street with a big cab hanging above the entrance, which looks like an alley. It’s really cool) and takes over. Back in and Kurt hits a forearm for two and chokes away in the corner. A belly to belly puts Tazz down but Angle goes up and gets crotched. Tazz hits a super Tazplex for two before getting rolled up for two. Angle gets two more off a bridging German before walking into a release German from Tazz. We unleash the suplexes on Kurt before the Tazmission ends Angle’s undefeated streak.

Rating: C+. This was short, but to say it was an effective debut is an understatement. The place ERUPTED when Tazz won which is exactly the point of the opening match. See, this is what you call LISTENING to the audience. WWF knew they had to appeal to the ECW fans and what better way than to have Tazz debut here? Today, Tazz would be in some comedy match and would likely lose, because Heaven forbid that the fans get what they want in one city for one night.

Angle does a stretcher job.

We go to the Hardys in the back and get a clip of them and the Dudleys putting each other through tables. Terri, the Hardys’ manager here, is told to stay in the back. She would be gone from the team soon, thank goodness.

Tazz says Angle is just the first victim.

Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

I believe match #1 or #2 in a series of roughly 8000 and it’s an elimination tables match. Bubba praises John Rocker of the Braves who had recently gone on a massive anti-New York rant in Sports Illustrated. The Hardys hit the ring and the match starts fast with Bubba hitting the Bubba Bomb on Jeff. No tags here thank goodness. Bubba sets up a table in the ring but before he can get another one, Jeff takes him out with a HUGE flip dive.

Jeff gets sent into the steps as Matt escapes a powerbomb through the table. D-Von suplexes Matt as Jeff CRACKS Bubba in the head with a chair. In a SICK spot, Jeff tries to run the railing but Bubba throws the table at Jeff, knocking him out of the air. That sounded GREAT. The pairings trade off and Bubba loads up the backsplash through the table, only for Jeff to come back and try a double superplex. D-Von moves the table but doesn’t stop the suplex.

Matt brings in a ladder because this might as well be a TLC style match. We head to the floor where the ladder is set up in front of a table with Bubba on it. Matt dives through Bubba through the table just as Jeff dives in from off camera with a splash, sending Bubba through the table in another awesome looking spot. So it’s 2-1 now with Jeff leaning a table up against the barricade. The steps are set up on their end and a table is set up like a bridge between the steps and the apron.

D-Von is placed on the bridged table but moves before Matt dives through him. He moves AGAIN to avoid a diving Jeff, sending him through the leaning table. Cool sequence there by Ninja D-Von. Apparently Bubba doesn’t have to leave. Ok that makes things more interesting. The Dudleys set up two steps in the ring and put a table across them before hitting a HUGE powerbomb on Matt to eliminate (in a sense) him. The tables are LOUD tonight too. Jeff gets beaten into the aisle but Matt quickly follows, only to get WHACKED in the head with a chair.

The Dudleys stack up four tables in front of the entrance (it’s the MSG setup where the entrance is opposite the cameras). Matt gets put on the tables and Jeff is CRACKED in the head again to break up the save attempt. Bubba climbs onto the taxi over the aisle to splash Matt, but remember that wouldn’t win the match. Jeff climbs up after him (I’m not sure where D-Von went) and blasts him with a chair, knocking him through two of the tables (still doesn’t win). Matt puts D-Von on the table and Jeff dives off the taxi with the Swanton through D-Von through the table for the win.

Rating: B+. This was AWESOME with all four guys being young and hungry here. The Dudleys were out to prove themselves and the Hardys were out to show they could hang in a fight. They had already proven they could fight in a violent match like the ladder match, but this was a brawl instead of a high flying match. REALLY fun stuff here though and well worth a look if you haven’t seen it. The Dudleys would get the titles next month, setting up the first triangle ladder match at Mania.

Angle gets a concussion test and complains that being choked out is illegal.

It’s time for the Miss Rumble Bikini contest with Sgt. Slaughter, Tony Garea, Moolah, Johnny V, FREDDY FREAKING BLASSIE and Andy Richter from Late Night with Conan O’Brien as judges. Jerry gets to emcee of course. The contestants are Ivory, Terri, Kat, Jackie, BB (You shouldn’t remember her) and Luna. The idea here is that Kat legitimately took her top off (full exposure too, the only intentional female nudity in WWF history) at Armageddon and more nudity was promised here.

Ivory doesn’t want to do it but eventually does. Terri does her usual skin colored one which we’ve seen before. Lawler freaks out over her bending over the ropes. Jackie…no one cares. BB isn’t bad but again, the whole point of this is for Kat to win. Luna won’t show. Kat is in a bikini made of bubble wrap. Creative if nothing else. The judges start tallying their scores but here’s Mae Young to enter as well. She takes off her robe, and THERE is the nudity (it was fake). Mae wins to complete the joke. Lawler’s reaction of “OH MY GOD I SAW THEM” is priceless. Mark Henry comes in to save our collective retinas.

The recently hired Coach doesn’t have much to say from WWF New York.

Chyna and Jericho, the co-IC Champions, argue over who gets to wear the belt to the ring. There was a double pin in a title match and they became co-champions as a result, which is a pretty creative idea.

Angle says he’s still undefeated. Rock would pin him on Smackdown a few weeks later.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

You know Jericho is fired up to be in MSG. He talks about how awesome his championship celebration will be, as it will make the millennium celebration look like his sister’s seventh birthday party. Holly piefaces Chyna down to start before getting in a slap fight with Jericho. Chyna gets sent to the floor for the Slaughter fall, leaving the blondes to fight for a bit. Holly hits that perfect dropkick of his but Jericho comes back with the forearm.

They slug it out until Holly tries a rana (huh?), only to get caught in the Walls. Chyna makes the save, basically turning heel at the same time. Chyna sends Holly to the floor and gets drilled by Jericho. Holly and Chyna go to the floor where Jericho tries a dive but slips and only hits Holly. Back in and there’s the handspring elbow and DDT from Chyna to the Canadian for two. Everyone heads to the floor where Jericho saves Chyna from a chair shot. Back in and both champions go up for a kind of double splash for two.

They both tried for a cover and a fight breaks out as a result. Chyna escapes a belly to back suplex and hits Jericho low, followed by a Pedigree for two on Holly. Chyna goes up but gets caught in a modified Doomsday Device (cross body instead of a clothesline) for a very close two. That probably should have been the finish. Now Jericho loads up a superplex but gets crotched for his efforts. Holly gets superplexed by Chyna but gets two on her off the bounce. Chyna chairs Holly in the head and puts on the Walls, only to have Jericho break it up and hit the Lionsault for the undisputed title and a BIG pop.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good and too short to get bad. It could have been on Raw but see, back in 2000, there was this crazy idea of finishing angles on PPV. I know that’s insane now and everything ends in a big match on Raw or rather just stops happening one day, but back in the old days, they ended like this. Match was fine.

Rock is worried about two and only two men in the Rumble: Crash Holly and Headbanger Mosh. Cole (minus facial hair) suggests maybe Rock should be worried about, say, Big Show. Rock says go make a glass of shut up juice (not one of his better catchphrases) and tells Big Show he doesn’t care what he thinks. He guarantees to win the Rumble right here in New York City and the place eats it up. I want one of those jerseys he’s wearing.

Jericho says he said he’d win and he’ll lead the Jerichoholics like a pied piper.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. New Age Outlaws

The Outlaws are defending and there’s a backstory that doesn’t deserve to be listed. Who would have thought that THIRTEEN YEARS LATER the Outlaws would be on house shows for the WWE again? The Outlaws are heels here but they’re over like free beer in a frat house here in New York. The APA storms the ring and the beating is on quickly. Bradshaw and Billy officially get us started with Billy taking a fast beating. Both guys tag as the referee is adjusting his ear piece.

Faarooq imitates Dogg’s dance before getting double teamed a bit. Bradshaw breaks up the shaky knee drop and everything breaks down. The Clothesline kills Billy and there’s the spinebuster to Roadie….but Billy pulls the referee out. The ref is bumped and Road Dogg is hit with a double powerbomb. X-Pac runs in and kicks Bradshaw’s head off. The Fameasser to the future JBL retains the titles in like two and a half minutes. This had to be cut for time. The Outlaws would lose the titles to the Dudleys next month and that would be the end of the team.

Dogg rhymes about keeping the titles.

We recap HHH vs. Cactus Jack. HHH won the title the night after Summerslam from Mankind via cheating. Big Show got the title at Survivor Series but lost it back to HHH in January. Mankind stood up to the newly formed McMahon-Helmsley Era and got beaten down for his efforts. Foley got fired and we had a fake Mankind get humiliated. Rock then said that every single wrestler would walk out and form the Rock Wrestling Federation if Foley wasn’t rehired. See how different storylines could be back then? Mankind got HHH to agree to a street fight at the Rumble but got beaten up for his efforts.

This led to an AWESOME promo on Smackdown, where Mankind said he wasn’t ready to face HHH in a street fight, but he knew someone who did. He took off his mask and ripped open his shirt to reveal Cactus Jack, scaring HHH to death. These two, as in Cactus Jack and HHH, had fought in 1997 in the match that basically brought hardcore to the WWF and they did it in MSG, with Cactus winning clean. This was an excellent story and there was a VERY real feeling that Cactus could pull this off, because HHH was in WAY over his head. Check out the build to this match as it’s some of the best stuff you’ll EVER see.

WWF World Title: Cactus Jack vs. HHH

Street fight. It should also be noted that Foley lost about 30 pounds inside of a month and a half and is by far the slimmest you’ll ever see him look here. HHH does the long slow walk to the ring which makes things feel even more epic. Stephanie heads to the back which is probably a good thing. Dang I miss that big title. It’s SO much better looking than the stupid spinner version. Even now when it doesn’t spin it doesn’t look like something special but rather something like a toy. The belt on HHH looks classy.

Cactus looks like and animal and HHH looks terrified. Jack wins a quick slugout and pounds HHH down into the corner. We head to the floor for a swinging neckbreaker on HHH and a legdrop onto the apron knocks the Game back to the floor. HHH is rammed into various metal objects but comes back with a bell shot to take over. NOW we get to the fun part as the first chair is brought in.

Back in and Jack charges right into a chair shot like an idiot. Granted for him, that’s playing the character right. HHH goes to unhook the buckle instead of covering for some reason and Jack pops up to clothesline the champ down. There’s a legdrop onto a chair onto HHH’s head for two and we head outside again. HHH gets backdropped into the crowd and the beating begins again. JR: “They’re out in the sea of humanity.” Jerry: “Humanity? JR we’re in New York.”

HHH gets rammed into something made of metal that we can’t see and they head into the aisle. Cactus sets up a wooden pallet and suplexes HHH onto it before screaming in his face. This isn’t falls count anywhere mind you. There’s a trashcan to the head and HHH gets rammed into the steel doors. The fans chant for Foley as he gets suplexed onto the trashcan. The crowd is just RUTHLESS against HHH here as they head back to the ring. The aisle is really short so it’s not a long walk.

Jack rams a knee into HHH’s head to drive it into the steps and it’s back inside now. This is almost all Jack so far. There’s the 2×4 in barbed wire but HHH hits him low to get the board away. Some shots to Cactus’ ribs and back have him in trouble and HHH looks at the board as if to say “did I just do that?” Cactus blocks a shot to the head and hits HHH in the balls with the board. The double arm DDT puts HHH down as the referee takes the board out of the ring, drawing the loudest booing of the ngiht.

Cactus wants the board back and beats up the Spanish announce team who the board was left with. He gets a board (clearly not the same one but that’s likely for safety reasons) and after the referee is crushed, HHH gets hit in the forehead with the wire. The board is driven into HHH’s forehead and he’s busted something fierce now. The referee is back up now and we get the most famous spot of the match with Jack ripping the wire across HHH’s cut to make him scream.

Cactus tries to piledrive HHH through the announce table (same thing he won the 97 match with) but HHH counters with a backdrop. JR: “The champion is bleeding like a horse.” When does a horse bleed? HHH is bleeding from his leg which is a rare sight to see. The place LOUDLY cheers for Foley and we head back inside. The Pedigree is countered into a slingshot into the post and a bulldog on the wire gets two.

HHH has a spot called to him about the steps before the Cactus Clothesline takes them both to the floor. Cactus charges but gets hiptossed into the steps, banging his knee in the process. You know a Flair disciple like HHH knows how to work on a knee. Back inside and HHH clips him down before picking up the barbed wire for another shot to the knee. HHH pulls out some handcuffs in a flashback to last year.

Cactus fights back and hits HHH in the head with the cuffs in a smart move. The cuffs are locked up a few seconds later though and HHH starts pounding away. The steps are brought in but Foley comes out of nowhere with a drop toehold to send HHH face first into the steel. A low blow keeps HHH down and Cactus bites away. HHH gets back up and grabs a chair which he literally BREAKS over the back of Cactus. They head outside again and Cactus takes some shots to the head from the chair.

Cactus says hit me again but before HHH can crush the skull, Rock pops out of nowhere and blasts HHH in the head with a chair of his own. A cop comes in and unlocks the cuffs, freeing Cactus. HHH starts backpedaling fast but gets caught on the Spanish Announce Table. The piledriver hits this time but the table DOESN’T BREAK.

We haven’t gotten violent enough yet, so here’s a bag of thumbtacks. Stephanie comes out (complete with snakeskin choker in a nod to Cactus) and HHH comes back with a backdrop onto the tacks. There’s the Pedigree but Cactus kicks out at two to blow the roof off the place. It doesn’t last long though as a Pedigree ONTO THE TACKS finally ends Cactus.

Rating: A+. FREAKING OW MAN! If there’s a match that made a guy into a legitimate force better than this one made HHH, I’d love to see it. This was an absolute war with both guys destroying each other for about 27 minutes. The place never gave up on Foley and it’s easily one of his best matches ever. This is one of the best brawls ever and yet again it’s well worth checking out.

HHH is taken out on a stretcher but Cactus pulls him back into the arena. There’s a barbed wire shot to the head and the place cheers like crazy for Mick some more.

Linda is at WWF New York to talk about HHH’s title reign. Wait no she’s not. She would NEVER be involved with something involving bloodshed. And Stephanie is oh so precious and does SO much work for charity don’t you know.

Royal Rumble

The intervals are “two minutes or less” according to the Fink. We get a quick look at Shawn’s miracle save in 95 which would play a role in the coming weeks. D’Lo Brown is #1 and Grandmaster Sexay is #2. Feeling out process to start with Sexay countering Brown’s running powerbomb into a rana. A middle rope missile dropkick puts Brown down and Mosh, complete with cones on his chest, is #3.

Kai En Tai, two guys ticked off about not being in the Rumble, runs in and are immediately thrown out. Nothing else happens for a minute or so until Christian (with his AWESOME solo theme called Blood Brother. Look it up) is #4. Nothing happens again so here’s Rikishi to a POP at #5. Mosh, Christian and Brown are quickly dispatched, leaving Grandmaster and Rikishi.

Scotty 2 Hotty is #6 to complete the trio…..and it’s time to DANCE! The place absolutely loses it over this until Rikishi clotheslines and eliminates them both. Note that it is NOT a heel turn and just business, which Too Cool is ok with. Rikishi dances a bit more on his own and the place is still erupting.

The company took notice of those eruptions too, and the three of them wound up feuding with the Radicalz for the next four months or so, resulting in Too Cool getting the tag titles and Rikishi getting the IC Title. In other words, they were given a stupid gimmick, got it over, and were rewarded. Today, you get to lose the US Title to Jack Swagger and become a jobber to the stars if you get yourselves over. As I typed that, Steve Blackman came in at #7 and was eliminated.

Viscera is #8 and you know New York loves itself a fat boy battle. Big Visc rams into him a few times but misses a charge and three straight superkicks put him him. Big Boss Man is #9 and won’t get in, drawing some good heel heat. He stays out on the floor until Test is #10. Test pounds away on Boss Man to finally get all three guys in there. Boss Man hits Test low but Rikishi hits Test low to put both guys down.

British Bulldog is #11 as things slow down a bit. There’s a low blow for Rikishi as well and Bulldog tries to get him out until Gangrel is #12. Kai En Tai comes out again and Taka is thrown over the top into a 360, landing face first on the floor. FREAKING OW MAN. This would be played multiple times over the rest of the match, much to Lawler’s amusement. Edge (starting to mean something and over in New York) is #13.

Boss Man takes a Banzai Drop and Bob freaking Backlund is #14. He comes out to Hail to the Chief as he’s legitimately running for Congress in Connecticut at this point. You would think that would have been a tip for Linda’s future but alas no. Everyone goes after Rikishi and dumps him out to get us to the second part of the match. To recap, we’ve got Boss Man, Bulldog, Test, Gangrel, Backlund and Edge in there at the moment. Jericho is #15 to his third or fourth big pop of the night.

Jericho goes right for Edge in a match that would be for the world title eventually. That doesn’t last long though as Jericho dumps Backlund, who yells at some fans before leaving. Actually he goes into the crowd to look for Connecticut registered voters. For a guy as bland as he was back in the day, Crazy Backlund is one of the best performances I’ve ever seen.

Crash is #16 and gets a double spanking from Edge and Bulldog. Ok then. Edge is sent to the apron by Bulldog so he punches the British Boy in the balls. Chyna is #17 in the far less remembered Rumble appearance. She goes right for Jericho and suplexes him out in about 30 seconds but gets knocked out by Boss Man almost immediately. Faarooq is #18 and here’s the Mean Street Posse who is also out of the Rumble. Those three and Kai En Tai were all thrown out of the Rumble on Heat so five more guys could be added in.

Anyway Faarooq is quickly dumped and Road Dogg is #19. The crowd does his entrance for him but he runs right into a low blow. The fans want Puppies, a term Road Dogg invented. Crash survives an elimination and Al Snow is #20. Roadie throws out the Bulldog and Val Venis is #21. Funaki runs in on his own and is thrown out almost immediately again. Prince Albert (Tensai) is #22 and there goes Edge.

The ring is getting too full now with Boss Man, Test, Gangrel, Crash, Road Dogg, Snow, Venis and Albert. Dogg continues his strategy: hide in the corner and wrap all four limbs around the bottom rope. I’ve heard worse ideas. Hardcore Holly is #23 and we’re getting down to almost only big names left. Crash gets knocked to the apron but gets back in AGAIN.

Now we get to the final part of the match as The Rock is #24 to bring everyone to their feet. Boss Man is the first victim, being eliminated by a spit punch. Venis and Test double team him but Rock hangs on in the corner. He beats up Hardcore for a bit as Billy Gunn is #25. He goes right for Rocky but since no one believes Billy Gunn is going to eliminate Rock, the Great One throws out Crash to give himself something to do instead. Dogg has shifted over to another corner now.

Big Show, Rock’s opponent for this match, is #26. Rocky pounds on him immediately but Albert sticks his fat head in Rock’s business. Show dumps Gangrel and Test before going to stomp on Rocky. Bradshaw is #27 and is out in about 30 seconds at the hands of the Outlaws and the Mean Street Posse. Kane is #28 complete with the still sexy Tori. Venis gets thrown out almost immediately and Show stupidly gorilla presses Gunn down instead of out. Kane knocks Albert out as Godfather is #29. The Ho’s are especially good looking tonight.

Funaki comes out for the fourth time. JR: “For the love of Pete.” Jerry: “No that’s Funaki.” X-Pac is #30 which was announced in advance. The final group is Road Dogg, Al Snow, Hardcore Holly, Rock, Gunn, Show, Kane, Godfather and X-Pac. Snow dumps Holly and Show puts Godfather out. Rock dumps Snow to get us to six. Billy dumps a talking too much Roadie just before getting dumped by Show.

We’ve got X-Pac, Kane, Big Show and Rock as the final four. I’ve seen far worse. Rock throws out X-Pac but the referee is with Kane who is fighting the Outlaws on the floor. Pac gets back in and the guys pair off. Show sends Rock into Kane for a big boot as the giants choke each other. Pac kicks Rock down and Kane hits a pretty good enziguri and an even better slam on Big Show. Pac kicks Kane out and a Bronco Buster on Big Show.

Rock dumps X-Pac and we’re down to two. The spinebuster sets up the Elbow but since IT’S JUST A FREAKING ELBOW DROP, Show gets up and chokeslams Rock down. Show takes WAY too much time though and Rock holds onto the top rope, sending Big Show out to go to Wrestlemania. Awesome ending to an awesome match.

Rating: A. AWESOME Rumble here with the absolute right ending. This was the Rock’s Rumble and there was no other person who should have won it. The only part that was a little dull here was the middle but it’s certainly not bad. This followed the three part structure as all great Rumbles do and as usual, it worked like a charm. Great Rumble and one that might have a claim to best ever.

Rock says he’s going to Wrestlemania when Big Show comes in and knocks him to the floor. Show stands in the ring as Rock leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: A+. This is one of the best shows the WWF has ever put on. Period. There isn’t a bad match on the whole card, the crowd is ON FIRE all night and you have two excellent matches to round out the show. I can’t imagine anything in the next 12 years surpassing this one and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Outstanding show.

Ratings Comparison

Tazz vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A-

Redo: C+

Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: A

Redo: B+

Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: C

Redo: C+

New Age Outlaws vs. Acolytes

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

HHH vs. Cactus Jack

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Royal Rumble

Original: A-

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A

Still great and still the best Rumble ever.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/19/royal-rumble-count-up-2000-match-of-the-decade-maybe-yeah/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2000 (Original): The Fight

Royal Rumble 2000
Date: January 23, 2000
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 19,200
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

At this point, the wars are over. WCW is practically dead and the WWF just keeps pouring it on. The main thing that’s different than last year though is simple: Austin is gone. With the company so far ahead that they would have to be WCW to manage to lose the lead they had built up, Austin was finally allowed to take the nearly yearlong break that he so badly needed to get his neck fixed once and for all.

With him out of the way, the Rock and HHH have stepped up. To all Rock fans, get this through your heads: without Austin taking this time off, Rock would be a fairly big star at best. He’s not bigger than Austin, he never was bigger than Austin, and he never will be bigger than Austin. He got as big as he got because of Austin not being there and that’s all there is to it.

Anyway, a lot of the roster is filled out now as we have guys like Jericho, Angle, the Dudleys, Show and I believe the Radicalz would debut the next night or eight days later so they were just over the horizon at this point. Your other main event tonight is HHH vs. Cactus Jack in a street fight, which was one of the best matches I’ve ever seen and since I want to get to it, we’re starting now.

The opening video is about how insane Cactus is and how sane HHH is. That was the real point of the street fight tonight: getting HHH over as a crazy man. In other words, Foley is doing what he might be the best ever at, and that’s even better than Flair: getting people over and making them look better than anyone else ever could. There’s no mention of the match at all here, which is odd. After a brief intro from Jerry and Jim, we’re ready to go.

Kurt Angle vs. ???

Angle was the undefeated rookie wonder here and he had issued an open challenge here or something like that. He’s the clean cut kid here that no one could touch at this point. It had leaked out who the opponent would be, but not to the general public. Angle of course gives a speech talking about how great he is. The crowd is very hot already as is customary of a New York crowd. He gets some cheap heat by ripping on the Knicks, which is just fine. Cheap heat is still heat.

This is less than a week after the MSG Raw before Survivor Series so I’m fired up about the Garden in general. Actually the fans are chanting for the guy he’s about to fight so I guess they know who’s coming. Angle was just ridiculously great in this role. The music hits, and the symbol that we’ve been seeing for a few months comes up for Taz, who is the mystery guy. The crowd pops like a cherry for him too. I mean they are LOUD.

Angle beats on him for a few minutes until Taz gets his hands on him and let the suplexing begin. After a German, a head and arms, and a T-Bone, the Tazmission debuts in the WWF and Angle is out cold in about 20 seconds, ending his undefeated streak and making Taz look like an insane killing machine. Now that is how you debut a guy. Once Taz got going, he DESTROYED Angle. Angle is taken out on a stretcher as apparently it was a choke and not a sleeper.

Rating: A-. Yeah it’s just over three minutes long, but DANG. That was a nearly perfect debut as Taz looked awesome there and Angle put him over like a master despite having only been around a few months at this point. Taz dominated here and was supposed to get the push that Benoit wound up getting, but because of Hardcore Holly messing up a spot with a candy jar at Mania, Taz had an eye injury and had to take a lot of time off, so Benoit got the big IC title push instead.

Matt, Jeff and Terri are in the back to talk about the first ever tag team table match. Terri actually looks good here. They “won” her in the Terri Invitational Tournament (initials) so she’s their manager for awhile. This doesn’t last long as they realized Terri had no talent so that ended that. She was split from them by Mania I think. Anyway, the Dudleys have been putting people through tables so Matt and Jeff put them through some on Smackdown, leading to this match.

Taz says that he’s going to go right through this company.

Hardy Boys vs. Dudley Boys

Like I said, this is a table match. The Dudleys have been around for a few months here and were the best team that people had seen in forever as no one had seen two guys this violent in a mainstream promotion for more than a few weeks before. And no, Public Enemy doesn’t count due to a lack of talent. Bubba is still a southern stutterer here.

We get a John Rocker reference as Bubba says that’s his new favorite player. For those of you that have either forgotten him or haven’t ever heard of him, he was a decent relief pitcher for the Braves who went on this insane tirade one day, bashing just about every religious or ethnic group in existence and complaining that New York had all of them. It was a big deal and he got in a lot of trouble for it.

He was HATED in New York because of it so just saying his name was instant mega heat. There’s a taxi hanging above the entrance. The entry way is really cool as it looks like an alley or a street to play up the street fight later on. In this you have to put both people through tables so we’re guaranteed an extra table or so. Thankfully we don’t have the pointless tagging thing here.

Don’t you love how ECW had just gotten on television nationwide in late August and within five months three of their biggest stars ever are opening a WWF PPV to HUGE pops from the New York crowd? Yet Vince said he never stole stuff from them. Keep telling yourself that Vince. You just happened to have these three guys get their biggest exposure yet back to back in a gimmick match made famous in ECW in front of their second most important city?

I’m not saying it’s bad because it’s a great idea, but Vince stole these guys. Again, smart, but not original at all like he would like you to believe. Naturally Jeff is flying all over the place. Bubba takes a SWEET chair shot from Jeff. He follows that up by running along the barricade at Bubba, but the member of Team 3D picks up the table and just chucks it at Jeff, slamming into his head for a great sound effect. See, this is a great example of not overbooking a match.

With these four guys, there’s zero need to try to do something big and complex. Just tell these guys to go out there and beat the heck out of each other using weapons and high spots. Honestly, what more do you need these guys to do? You just let the guys go out there and rock the place. This was the real answer to the Cruiserweights in WCW: bigger guys just going out there and having over the top gimmick matches. It seems to be working fine here, and it got people’s attention.

The Hardys get the advantage again and they set for a double suplex on Bubba from the middle rope, but D-Von moves the table. I’ve always loved spots like that, as the guy is more or less saying he doesn’t care if his partner is hurt or anything, as long as he doesn’t go through a table. That’s brilliant. Here’s your token ladder, which foreshadows and references past and future matches which is hard to do.

There are some SICK chair shots in this. Matt has Bubba on a table on the floor but D-Von almost makes a save. Matt shoves him straight into a fan which was a not so good looking spot. Matt gets the leg drop to put Bubba through, but from out of absolutely nowhere, Jeff jumps at the same time in a half splash half elbow half manbearpig onto Bubba. I mean he came from nowhere. Think Shelton jumping onto the ladder to stop I think Van Dam at Mania.

We have a huge HOLY CRAP chant as D-Von takes another great chair shot. Bubba can barely stand. I think he can still be in the match and it’s not an elimination. I’m not sure if I like that or not. In ANOTHER nice sequence, D-Von is on a table on the floor and Matt dives at him. He moves and stands in front of another table and dives out of the way so Jeff crashes through that one.

That looked like something out of a Die Hard movie. Bubba is back now and I’m completely into this match. They point out that since the Dudleys didn’t put them through tables, it’s not over. At least they follow the rules of the match. They set up an elevated table and power bomb Matt through it, which Ross says will cause some erection dysfunction. Don’t ask. I’ve always liked the euphoric thing Bubba did when he went through the tables. It was just cool.

The finish here is somehow the coolest part. They head to the entry way where the Dudleys set up double tables. They go up to the top of the set and get on the taxi, where Bubba tries to get a powerbomb. Jeff fights out of it and hits Bubba with a chair to knock him straight back off of it, which looks cool enough as is. After that, D-Von gets put on the table and the Swanton Bomb ends this freaking awesome match.

Rating: A. THIS WAS AWESOME! The spots were completely insane and the chemistry was undeniable here. The crowd ate it up too so it sounded great. There was no story here and there wasn’t supposed to be. There’s nothing wrong with just a wild brawl when it’s done right and this was a great example of that. Just all kinds of fun and the fans bought every bit of it.

Angle is very groggy and acts like he has a concussion where he’s only concerned about being undefeated. It’s funnier than it sounds.

We’re now going to have the Miss Rumble pageant. This is coming off the heels of the Kat taking her top off at the last PPV and actually showing on screen for about 2-3 seconds which was a HUGE thing as nudity was actually shown on WWF TV with no issue about it. Of course then the PTC freaked the heck out about it as the company was apparently corrupting children’s minds by showing an adult image on a show that an adult had to order for their children on a show called Armageddon.

Dang, Vince really is trying so hard to corrupt the minds of the youth. It would be so simple to allow a 12 year old to see such a thing. All they would have to do is order a PPV while making sure to sound like an adult on the phone, find some way to keep their parents from noticing them watching it when a show they didn’t order is on, hide the cable bill from their parents and then manage to pay for the show themselves despite likely not having a checking account or a credit card.

I mean really Vince, at least have SOME kind of way to prevent kids from seeing the show. Anyway, this is a beauty pageant and according to the rating, there would be more nudity here. The judges are Slaughter, Tony Garea who no one under 35 knows, Fabulous Moolah, Johnny V and Freddie Blassie who gets a great pop. Lawler is the host for this. First up is Ivory who is wearing a big sweatshirt. Terri is second to a solid pop.

Jackie, who no one likes at all, is third. Fourth is a woman named Barbara Bush who was nicknamed BB and was an EMT or something. She lasted all of a month or two. Luna is 5th as this is going to take awhile. Kat is the final one and she gets a solid pop. She’s women’s champion at the moment. Of all people, the celebrity judge is ANDY RICHTER from “The Conan O’Brien Show.” Seriously that’s what they call it.

This is your standard thing so I’ll skip most of the details. Lawler’s jumping up and down is kind of funny. No one has ever cared about Jackie at all and no one does here either. This really is moronic. Luna, despite wearing a gown that is just buttoned in the front and a thong under it, won’t disrobe. Kat’s is made of bubble wrap. Yep, that’s your Women’s Champion.

Naturally Mae Young comes out and wants to compete also. She disrobes and takes her top off. The look on Lawler’s face when he sees them is priceless. That’s your nudity for the night, and yes, we see them. Mark Henry who was for no apparent reason dating Mae at the time comes out to cover her up. Mae wins unanimously. WZ actually had a link on the main page to a still shot of Mae’s chest. I wish I was making that up.

We go to WWF New York which is new to meet the debuting Coach. Man that place would have been awesome to go to.

Don’t try this at home. Good advice.

Jericho and Chyna are in the back arguing about who should wear the belt. This was a very interesting angle they did where they were co champions. In other words, they could both defend the title individually but if say Jericho lost, Chyna lost too which made it something different. Unnecessary, but different.

Angle says that since he was choked out, he’s still undefeated.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Chyna vs. Hardcore Holly

This is for the undisputed title. Holly is there because he’s beaten both of them one on one and it’s an even numbered year so we have to give him his next failure of a push. Seriously, he got more pushes than a grandmother that stands in front of a flight of stairs. Chyna was a big deal at the time as a woman legitimately competing with men was unheard of yet she was pulling it off.

Jericho is over to say the least. Jericho was awesome on the mic at this point as you could tell he was just so happy to be out of WCW. This is a standard match for the most part, which means one person goes down and the other two have a short singles match until the third comes back. Jericho is by far and away the favorite here. Chyna hits the handspring elbow which for the life of me I still don’t get the point of.

Chyna and Jericho keep vying to outdo each other and it’s not that interesting. Why in the world did Holly need to be in this? I just don’t get that. Holly takes a slow but decent Pedigree but kicks out anyway. They’re doing a lot of near falls near the end here, which at least is building a bit of drama. It’s not a bad match, but it’s just not that interesting. Jericho hits a Lionsault on Chyna to become undisputed champion, and that’s that.

Rating: C. Like I said, this wasn’t bad but it just wasn’t interesting at all. Holly flat out didn’t need to be in there since he wasn’t even involved in the decision. This wasn’t much, but it was ok and certainly watchable.

Rock, rocking the SWEET Brahma Bull jersey, is in the back with Cole and says that there are two people he’s worried about in the Rumble: Crash Holly and Mosh. Cole questions this so Rock says go have a glass of shut up juice. He calls out Big Show and says that he wants it to wind up as those two in the final pairing. The charisma here is completely ridiculous it’s so high. He really was a god on the mic.

Jericho cuts a traditionally great promo talking about how he’s going to lead the Jerichoholics to the promised land like a pied piper while holding up the Interchrisinental Title.

We recap the APA vs. the Outlaws, which is here because the APA won a battle royal thing.

Tag Titles: Acolytes vs. New Age Outlaws

After about a two minute entrance we’re ready to go. This match lasts two and a half minutes. The Acolytes beat the champions up. Or do they beat them down? I’m not sure actually. After a short mini match, X-Pac runs down and beats up Bradshaw, allowing Billy to his the Fameasser for the win.

I know that sounds like nothing but there’s just nothing at all to talk about. They brawled for 45 seconds, the Acolytes beat up the champions for a minute or so, then Pac was there for the finish. They much be setting up HHH/Foley for more time or something, which I’m fine with.

Rating: N/A. I can’t rate something this short at all.

Road Dogg says that even though they got their beaten up they’re still the champions. You can’t argue that one.

We recap HHH vs. Foley, which started with HHH beating Show clean for the belt and having the McMahon-Helmsley Era run things. Foley calls them out and he’s fired due to losing a pink slip on a pole match. A fake Mankind (Mideon) showed up to make fun of him. Rock and the rest of the roster threatened to leave and form the Rock Wrestling Federation unless Foley was reinstated. Mankind comes back and HHH beats the heck out of him after agreeing to the street fight.

Then, in one of the coolest moments of this era as far as I’m concerned, Mankind comes out and says he’s not ready to fight HHH in a street fight, but he has a replacement ready to go. He pulls open his shirt and takes off the mask and turns into Cactus Jack. HHH is FREAKING and then gets his head handed to him by Jack, setting this up. The level of awesome that Foley was in this multiple personalities thing was just insane on so many levels.

WWF Title: Cactus Jack vs. HHH

Jack gets a crazy pop and HHH might as well be a Red Sock. Stephanie looks great as usual. I love HHH being so nervous about getting in the ring as it really plays up his being out of his element. The intros take just shy of eternity, but you hear in HHH’s My Time song the words The Marks, The Suits, McMahon. I guess those are people he doesn’t like, which is kind of cool. Finally we’re on.

Foley is called Mankind time after time by Ross. Ross is stuttering like no other. HUGE Cactus Jack chant gets going. It’s all Jack so far. And just as I say that HHH hits a bell shot to the head. Naturally it doesn’t do much. In shades of Rumble 98, Jack runs straight into a chair shot like he’s running home after a day of simple torture as a child. The crowd is hot here as Jack puts the chair on HHH’s head and drops a leg on it.

And that can shatter a skull right Cole? Ross says HHH might be the best technical champion in company history. I’m not even touching that one as it’s so freaking stupid. We hit the crowd and the crowd is making this match better. It’s been hard hitting so far but we’ve been at this five minutes so far. We’re in the entry way now and HHH is getting killed. Remember that the entry way is set up like an alley, so the trash cans being there at least make sense.

This is ALL Cactus here. I love how Foley can become such a better threat with the gimmick change. It really is brilliant. The crowd is rapidly approaching ECW levels here. Basically HHH keeps using his regular stuff and Jack keeps going insane on him with violent stuff. It’s a great bit of storytelling mixed in which almost never happens in these matches. Jack goes under the ring with HHH down and pulls out a 2×4 wrapped in barb wire. Oh yes.

Ross is of course freaking. Due to the idiot of a referee, HHH gets the board and puts Foley down with four stiff shots with it, all to the back and front. That’s brilliant actually as Foley is wearing a shirt which likely has padding underneath it. While I can’t imagine that’s real barb wire, the image is great and for people that aren’t sharp enough to see what’s going on here, it’s a great way to make this match seem about 10 times more violent.

It’s the little things like that which can make a match and it’s doing so here. A board shot to the lower back which is considered a low blow stops the momentum HHH has built up. I love how with low blows half the time they’re not even close to the groin. The crowd booing when the barb wire board is thrown out is just classic stuff. Twelve minutes in we have our first cover. That’s another nice touch as it makes it seem like it’s about the violence rather than the pin here, which is what it’s supposed to be. In case you can’t tell, I really like this match. Granted Foley is my all time favorite wrestler and this was by far his best period, so there we are.

The referee goes down and a barb wire shot to the face puts HHH down. Ross is selling this as insanity on a great level. HHH is bleeding and it’s a good one. One is right next to his eye which looks even sicker. In a sick looking spot, HHH is trying to get out to the floor but Foley takes the board and the wire and puts it over the very cut forehead of HHH and just pulls back. The screaming is perfect as this match is tearing it up, even the Mr. kind.

Ross here is great on the mic as he’s not getting insane through the whole match. He gets way into it in bursts which makes those moments seem more impressive. That’s the big issue with guys like Cole. He gets into the match WAY too early and it takes away from the later big spots. Ross gets into the big spots but other than that he’s rather calm which helps to build up later stuff, thereby adding credibility to the good stuff.

That’s the mark of a great commentator: they don’t take anything away from the match but they add so much to it, like Ross is doing here. I usually can’t stand him but this is great stuff from him. Jack goes through a table when he goes for a piledriver to get us back to even. HHH’s leg is bleeding, which is a very nice touch. Oddly the table that was destroyed wasn’t Spanish. That’s very odd indeed. DANG that’s a thick cut in his leg.

Cactus hits a bulldog onto the barb wire. One of the major keys here is that it’s completely unclear who is going to win. At the time, no one knew. That can completely make a match as in my eyes it’s the most important thing there is in wrestling. On the floor again, HHH gets a hip block onto the steps and Foley rams his knee into it. Using his generally good psychology, HHH goes for the knee with the barb wire.

The good thing is it’s still a sick thing to do despite how much it’s been used so far in this match alone. From nowhere HHH finds handcuffs and tries to put them on Foley, which after a brief comeback works. This is already a bit uneasy to watch but this is bringing flashbacks to last year. If nothing else there’s a bit of slack in these unlike last year so it looks a bit less awful if nothing else. Jack puts up a heck of a fight despite being in essence armless here. That’s just impressive.

I’ll go with this for how brutal this is: HHH actually breaks the chair from hitting Jack with it so hard. Has that ever happened before? With them back in the entry way, Jack begs HHH to hit him again, but Rock pops in from nowhere to half kill HHH with the chair. A cop pops in and unlocks Jack’s arms and we’re at it again, as the fans are right back into this thing. The piledriver works this time, but the table DOESN’T BREAK.

Think about that. How sick would that look? I mean HHH just stopped cold all of a sudden. We’re back in the ring now, as Jack pulls out a bag of thumbtacks. You have to remember, this is before Abyss made those look like watercolor paints. They were hardly ever used but they’re busting them out here. Jack goes into them via a backdrop just after Stephanie comes out. She’s wearing a leopard print choker, which is the same as Cactus’ boots in a nice little touch.

After that, the Pedigree gets two in what might have been the second cover of the match. Then to finish us off, in one of the sickest spots I’ve ever seen, Cactus gets Pedigreed onto the tacks for the pin. Jack is DEAD. HHH gets the belt and goes to the floor and just collapses. Stretchers come out and of course Jack is up to attack HHH one more time.

They would have a Cell match at No Way Out which was awesome as well where Foley would officially retire, and other than one match which was a surprise he kept true to that for the most part. I’m fine with short comebacks and occasional matches to put people over as he does so often. This made HHH look legit which is exactly what it was designed to do. This was awesome.

Rating: A+. Yes I’m being generous on the grades for this show, but DANG. These two half killed each other out there in easily the best brawl for the title I’ve ever seen. This was insanely violent and HHH came off looking great. There was a legit threat for Foley to take the title here which helped the drama a lot as well.

The blood was great and it added a completely new aspect to HHH’s character that’s still around today. These two beat the tar out of each other and it’s saying a lot when it’s Foley who has the job of making HHH look this great put into his hands, and luckily it worked and it worked very well. Go watch this match as it’s worth it. I’ve heard this match called the match of the decade and off the top of my head I can’t think of a better one.

After some generic interviews, it’s time.

Royal Rumble

D’lo Brown is number one and Grandmaster Sexay is 2nd. He gets a huge pop and we get more bad jokes about him not being Lawler’s kid. We’re doing 90 seconds here. X-Pac is 30th for reasons that would entail him winning some match no one remembered. Let the generic stuff begin. Granted they’re following a classic so there we go. I hate that laugh that Grandmaster does.

Mosh is third, dressed with two foot long cones sticking out of his chest. Kai En Tai runs out, despite not being in the match. They’re easily dispersed so that was completely pointless. They weren’t allowed in due to lack of room in case you were really bored. Mosh is hurt so we’re back to the original pairing while he hangs on the ropes. Christian, who has some of the most awesome music I’ve ever heard at this point, is 4th.

This is always the awkward part of the match as there aren’t enough people to have anything going yet and these guys have a combined chance of zero to do anything so few people really care but it’s better than nothing. Rikishi is 5th, 8 months before it turned out he tried to kill the biggest star in the world. He dumps everyone other than Grandmaster before anyone else comes out. That Rikishi Driver was a freaking awesome move.

Shockingly enough Scotty is 6th and we have the trio in the ring. You know what’s coming, and oddly enough I like this. It makes sense here. They’re all friends and even though it’s every man for themselves, this makes a lot of sense. The fans are very into it so that’s fine, and it doesn’t last long as Rikishi puts both guys out at the same time. I’m ok with that actually as it didn’t last long and it made sense.

Also, there’s still one guy there so it’s not like the next guy has to stand around waiting for a minute and a half. Things like this can work when done right, and this was done right. Also, the fans loved it so that automatically makes it far more ok. Rikishi’s nipples are really close together and it’s very odd looking. After they’re gone, Rikishi dances on his own a bit more. Steve Blackman is in at 7 and is gone in about 45 seconds.

See this right here is something the Rumble can be great at. Rikishi is a somewhat big star here, but he’s getting to show off here and he looks far more impressive now than he did when he came in. That’s a very simple way to get someone over and it worked here. Viscera is 8th and he actually hits a belly to belly on Rikishi. Three super kicks and a shoulder block and Big Daddy V is gone. Again, by just putting out a guy at a time he looks great and dominant.

They’re pushing him without him actually winning a match. Boss Man is 9th but he very slowly gets in. He stands on the floor and lets someone else come in to help him, which is smart. Granted this was considered a violation of the rules back in I think 94 but we can ignore that I think. Test comes in at 10 to a big old pop. I know it sounds absurd now, but he really could have gotten a brief title run sometime around here.

He should have gotten it at Survivor Series, but granted I can’t complain about going with Show when they did as he was completely dominant around that time. British Bulldog is 11th. One good thing here is there’s no dead weight in there to slow things down. Having people like Mosh and Grandmaster to fill out the roster is fine, but there’s no point to having them stay in there a long time, and here you can see why.

They were in the Rumble and there was no chance of them doing anything, so they got out early. It’s clear that the people in there now are higher up on the ladder and they’re in later, which makes them even possible dark horses to steal the thing. That’s very smart booking and some of the best I can ever remember for the Rumble.

Gangrel is 12th to get some jobbers in there which is fine to an extent. Kai En Tai runs out again and get thrown out with Gangrel just KILLING Taka. The bump he takes over the ropes is great as he over rotates and his face slams into the floor and bounces off. Edge is 13th to a solid pop. We get the Taka bump again to the delight of the king. BOB BACKLUND is 14th to a great pop.

Does this guy age? He’s 51 here and looks like he did 20 years ago. A ton of guys get together and throw out Rikishi. I’m impressed by Backlund. He looks great all things considered. Jericho is 15th as I’m loving the booking here. A few things are happening. They’re having little mini stories thrown in here and there to keep the match fresh and it’s working like a charm. It’s keeping the crowd entertained and they’re responding very well.

It’s a smart way to build up to the final guys which is the best way to go. This has been a very good Rumble. Jericho puts out Backlund. Crash Holly is 16th as I’ve never seen the resemblance to Elroy Jetson that everyone says exists. Chyna is 17th as Lawler starts picking everyone as being Rock. She puts Jericho out by suplexing him over the ropes but Boss Man puts her out seconds later.

To recap we have Gangrel, Edge, Test, Boss Man, Bulldog and Crash and they’re joined by Farrooq. The Mean Street Posse comes out as apparently they’re mad about not being in either. Boss Man puts out Farrooq due to their interference. Road Dogg is 19th. We’re kind of hitting a dead spot here as Al Snow is in at number 20. Road Dogg puts out Bulldog as JR makes dog jokes. Venis is 21st. Funaki is thrown out for the third time as Taka is apparently hurt.

That clip never gets old as they show it again. Prince Albert (A-Train) is 22nd as Edge is thrown out by Snow and Venis. Hardcore Holly is next. Amazingly enough, he gets no reaction. Rock is 24th to a HUGE reaction. There goes Boss Man. Billy Gunn is next as we’re getting close to the ending now. There goes Crash by the Rock. Road Dogg has hidden in the corner and has his arms and legs wrapped around the ropes. That’s rather smart.

Big Show is 26th. Rock hits him before he gets in and the pop is there. Test is gone in about 4 seconds. Gangrel lasts a bit longer than Test did against Big Show, making it about 8 seconds. Show still has long hair here so he looks more intimidating. Bradshaw is 27th and the Posse helps the Outlaws put him out with ease. Kane is 28th and we’re getting to the good part now. Tori looks AMAZING in this little black dress.

Kane puts out Snow in a few seconds and then Albert shortly thereafter. Godfather is 29th. I remember my father thinking he could have won this. Thankfully we don’t have a 20 second shot of the women to waste time. Funaki is back again and the joke is stupid now. X-Pac is in at 30 so our final group is X-Pac, Rock, Show, Kane, Snow, Billy Gunn, Road Dogg, Godfather and Holly.

Again note how this is a good thing: there are potential winners in there instead of just one guy that you know is going to get it. Holly is out and we’re down to 8. There goes Godfather as I type that. Snow is gone. Gunn puts out Road Dogg and Kane puts him out within a span of 5 seconds to bring us down to Rock, Show, Pac and Kane. At least the biggest four of the final 9 are left. Kane goes under the ropes to fight the Outlaws for no apparent reason.

X-Pac is thrown out but no one sees it. Kane and Big Show fight over a chokeslam as Kane slams him in a cool spot. Pac puts out Kane despite not being in there officially I guess. The Bronco Buster sucks the life out of this thing for me. Show throws him out with ease and we’re down to the best pairing possible with Big Show and Rock. The elbow gets a great pop. Show gets a chokeslam though to get crazy heat.

Show sets him for kind of a powerslam move which at least makes sense to throw him over but Rock grabs the top rope and Show goes over instead while Rock slides in under the bottom rope. Later on there would be a story where Show says that Rock’s feet actually touched and he had video to prove it. That led to Rock vs. Show at No Way Out for the Mania spot which Show won.

Vince came out and said that yes, Big Show was going to Mania, but the deal never said Rock wasn’t, so we got a triple threat. For no apparent reason, that match happened on Raw the Monday before. Linda then came out and said that it would be a four way at Mania, including the unretired for one night only Mick Foley.

There was a McMahon in every corner as they made sure that the main event of Wrestlemania was again about them instead of the wrestlers. But enough about that as this Rumble was great.

Rating: A-. This is how the Rumble is supposed to be done. Take a look at how they did this. You had the guys that were there to fill in the 30 spots in there first to make sure they were in and had an actual chance. Then we got the smartest move of the match: having Rikishi dominate.

This does a few things: it allows the jobbers to be cleared out as well as making Rikishi look good AND it offers a bridge to the next segment of the match where guys like Test and Boss Man could come in and hang around until we got to the final batch of guys. That’s very smart booking and it made this match work very well.

The Kai En Tai jokes were funny for the most part but it got to being overkill at the end. I was very happy with this whole match though as even though I knew the ending like the back of my hand, it worked and had me entertained. Excellent Rumble.

Overall Rating: A. This is a GREAT show. There’s one stupid part with the tag titles but if that was done to give the two main events more time then I’m completely fine with it. There was still a match there and they didn’t try to put an emphasis on a match that few would have been the most interested in rather than taking away from two great main events.

This was validation that the company could thrive without Austin and while I think he brings a lot to the table, he needed to go away for awhile to let some others get to his level. That was the issue: Rock or HHH or other people couldn’t get up to where Austin was because he was so high up there that it was impossible for anyone to touch him. His time taking time off gave everyone else a year to catch up, which was exactly what they needed. Definitely worth checking out.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2001 (2012 Redo): Rock And Austin Get All Alliancey

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2001
Date: November 18, 2001
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,142
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

While there’s a full card to go with the Survivor Series match, none of it matters compared to the main event. Some of the WCW and WWF Titles will be unified as well, which was a major problem at the time. There were so many belts floating around at the time that it didn’t matter when one would change hands. Thankfully a lot of those problems will be wrapped up tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a cool concept as it shows all of the old logos for the WWF over the years and a bunch of great moments in company history, set to a song called The End Is Here.

European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow

Christian is in the Alliance and defending. He greets his fans in South Carolina (that’s what he said) and calls himself awesome. Snow comes out to the Tough Enough (reality competition series where Snow was head trainer) theme which was quite a catchy tune. Snow takes him down to the mat to frustrates the champ. Christian comes back with a foot on Snow’s face in the corner followed by a Russian legsweep for two. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down.

Al fights up and hits his headbutts but Christian hits a tiger driver backbreaker for two. Snow gets rammed into the buckle and things slow down again. The trapping headbutts stop Christian again and Snow escapes the reverse DDT into a neckbreaker for two. Heyman schills for the Alliance guys in an always funny bit.

A sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow and now Christian’s reverse DDT scores for no cover. Instead Christian talks a lot of trash and gets rolled up for two. A top rope cross body is rolled through by Snow and the Snow Plow gets two. There’s the Unprettier out of nowhere to keep the title in the Alliance. That was quick.

Rating: C-. This is one of those shows where anything but the main event means nothing, which makes the first hour and a half of the show pretty uninteresting to sit through. That’s exactly the case here. This match was fine but it could have been on Smackdown on any given week. Snow and Christian are both good hands so a good match is really nothing too shocking.

Austin arrives and yells at the Alliance because he doesn’t like being accused of being a traitor to his team. This would be a lot better if Stephanie had more acting ability than say, a carrot. Austin yells at everyone on the team and says stop being paranoid.

Vince and Linda arrive with Vince brimming with confidence. Cole comes up and says this might be their last night in business but Vince doesn’t want to hear talk like that. Vince talks about taking calculated risks and being confident because someone is jumping to the WWF. Regal comes up and says he doesn’t buy the idea that Austin is jumping back to the WWF.

William Regal vs. Tajiri

These two are former friends. Regal hurt Tajiri’s (Japanese wrestler with a lot of fast kicks) girlfriend Torrie (not the same person with the same name but different spelling from years ago) on Smackdown to set this up. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion and was supposed to face X-Pac in a title for title match, but according to Commissioner Mick Foley, “No one cared about X-Pac or the Light Heavyweight Title anyway”. Tajiri fires off a kick but gets suplexed right back down.

The knee trembler takes Tajiri down but Tajiri goes after Regal’s knee with the kicks. There’s the Tarantula and Regal is bleeding from the nose. A handspring elbow gets two for Tajiri but Regal ties his head up in the ropes to stop the momentum dead. Regal tries a powerbomb but gets countered by another kick to the head. The Buzzsaw Kick misses and there’s the Tiger Bomb from Regal for the pin. Too short to rate but it was fine.

Regal powerbombs him again post match. Torrie (looking GREAT in a purple top and leather pants) comes out to check on Tajiri, only to get powerbombed as well.

We recap Edge vs. Test. These two are both midcard champions after the seemingly dozens of never ending midcard title changes going on at this point. Edge is US Champion, Test is Intercontinental Champion, tonight only one belt survives.

Test complains about the makeup lady not rubbing in the oil well enough on him. Stacy (his future girlfriend) comes up and agrees with Test. Test hits on her and she’ll think about it if he wins.

Edge compares himself to Test and says that there are a lot of similarities between them. The difference is that Edge hasn’t been dumped by every chick on the planet. Edge makes fun of Test for sounding wooden and that’s about it.

Intercontinental Title/US Title: Edge vs. Test

They fight over control to start with Edge taking over via a series of forearms to the head. Test powers him down and goes after the ribs with a wide ranging selection of stomps. We head to the floor with Edge being dropped across the barricade to further the attack on the ribs. Back in and Edge hits a dropkick to take over before we head outside again. They’re quickly back inside and a swinging neckbreaker gets two for Edge.

Test drops Edge onto the top rope ribs first to reinjure him and the taller of the blond Canadian champions takes over again. Test puts on a chinlock as the match slows down again. Edge fights up and avoids a corner charge before hitting a middle rope missile dropkick for two. A middle rope cross body misses though and Test puts him on the top rope.

Edge blocks a superplex with some CANADIAN right hands to the ribs but a sunset bomb doesn’t work. Test dives off the top but jumps right into a dropkick to put him down. The problem with this match is neither guy has been able to build up any kind of a run with the title as both have changed hands four times since the Invasion began about four months ago. How can you get behind either guy as a big time champion in that little bit of time? On top of that, Edge has been champion for six days and Test for thirteen. That’s not exactly Honky Tonk Man unifying with Luger in the late 80s.

Both guys are down now but it’s Edge up first with some clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Test’s pumphandle slam is countered into the Edge-O-Matic for two. Test spears Edge down for two but the big boot misses. There’s the pumphandle for two but Test’s powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana. Edge’s spear gets a close two but he can’t hit the Edgecution. Test tries a full nelson slam but Edge rolls through for the pin and both titles.

Rating: C+. This started pretty slow but it got going once Edge was able to start countering Test’s power stuff. In other words, Edge did the work to make Test’s generic big man offense look decent. This was probably the match of the night so far, which isn’t surprising given how hot Edge got in the next year.

Angle comes up to see a stressed out Stephanie. My goodness her acting is bad. I know I say that a lot, but IT’S FREAKING TERRIBLE. She says if the Alliance loses tonight, she’ll have to buy her own groceries and wash her own car. She can’t be a…..a…..a REGULAR PERSON!!! Angle reminds her that she’s special and doesn’t think Austin will jump.

A cage is lowered.

Jeff Hardy and Lita are talking about Matt Hardy being different lately. Matt comes up and yells at them for acting strange and not being focused enough. It turns into a rallying speech and things seem ok. The guys leave and Trish comes out of the same locker room Matt came out of earlier. Keep in mind that Matt is dating Lita at this point.

WCW Tag Team Titles/WWF Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

In a cage. The Dudleys are WCW Tag Team Champions and the Hardys are the WWF Tag Team Champions and Stacy is STUNNING at this point as the Dudleys’ manager. All four belts get laid out between the guys in the ring and it’s time to go. You can win by pin/submission/both members escaping. There are tags required here and it’s Matt vs. Bubba to start. Matt can’t get anywhere so it’s off to Jeff who walks into a Boss Man Slam for two.

D-Von comes in as Heyman talks about Big Daddy Dudley, which JR could not care less about. Back to Matt who rolls D-Von up for two but walks into a reverse inverted DDT for two. Bubba comes in again and drops a bunch of elbows for two. The Dudleys tag in and out a lot and it’s back to Bubba for more punching to Matt’s ribs. Bubba tries to ram Matt into the cage but gets countered into a reverse DDT.

Off to Jeff who cleans house as everything breaks down. Poetry in Motion hits Bubba and Matt climbs but D-Von makes the save. There’s a Bubba Bomb to Jeff which should likely hurt Bubba as well. Bubba goes up again but Matt slams him down for two. Matt gets rammed into the cage but when the Dudleys try to do the same to Jeff, he grabs the cage and tries to climb out, only to get caught in a Doomsday Device (Paul: “WHAT A RUSH!”).

Matt gets crushed against the cage and Bubba whips D-Von into him for good measure. Bubba splashes him as well and the Dudleys are in full control. Jeff gets in a shot and Matt hits a top rope double clothesline to shift the momentum just as fast though. A DDT puts Bubba down for two and Jeff hits the legdrop between D-Von’s legs. A double backdrop takes Ray down again and the Hardys go up.

Matt hits a legdrop and Jeff hits a splash off the top at the same time for two on Bubba. Matt makes a climb but gets pulled down with one leg still stuck in the cage. What’s Up to Jeff and Bubba asks Stacy for a table. Stacy hits on Nick Patrick and picks the key out of his pocket. There’s a table in the ring now but Matt breaks up the 3D by jumping Bubba. Why D-Von didn’t flapjack Jeff through the table is anyone’s guess.

Bubba and Matt go tot he top and pound away at each other until Bubba is knocked down. Matt climbs down to escape but he’s left alone against the Dudleys. D-Von is rammed into the cage a few times and Jeff goes up as D-Von climbs onto the table for no apparent reason. Jeff looks down and sees D-Von there before diving off the top of the cage, but the Swanton misses. Bubba covers the table and therefore Jeff as well for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good brawl between these teams and it furthers the Hardys’ issues, but at the end of the day this feud was played out at this point. There was nothing left for these two teams to do and at this point it was being dragged out way too far. Still though, good match and a good way to I believe finally end this nearly two year long feud.

Jeff is taken out on a stretcher.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and admits that his job (WWF Commissioner) means nothing.

Scotty 2 Hotty is about to be in the Immunity Battle Royal but Test beats him up to take his spot.

Immunity Battle Royal

Test, Billy Gunn, Bradshaw, Faarooq, Lance Storm, Billy Kidman, Diamond Dallas Page, Albert, Tazz, Perry Saturn, Raven, Chuck Palumbo, Crash Holly, Justin Credible, Shawn Stasiak, Steven Richards, Tommy Dreamer, The Hurricane, Spike Dudley, Hugh Morrus, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Funaki

I won’t bother explaining who all of these people are as most of them won’t be around again after this show. Some are from the Alliance and some are from the WWF but no matter who wins the main event tonight, the winner of this is guaranteed a job for a year. Stasiak is thrown to the floor before the bell rings and is apparently out. Test drops to the floor to hide as Tazz comes in late. Since it’s a battle royal there’s really not much to talk about here. Everyone punches everyone and no one is put out for awhile. Heyman freaks out about Tazz because Tazz choked him out on Smackdown.

Hurricane dives at Faarooq and is clotheslined out by Bradshaw. Albert throws Saturn out and Test, who is back in now, dumps Faarooq. Page is put out by someone we can’t see and Storm superkicks Palumbo out. Morrus and Chavo run in as wildcards because they tried to jump from the Alliance to the WWF on Raw but got fired as a result. Billy dumps Chavo as Morrus is eliminated as well. Tazz dumps Dreamer and Crash as Storm low bridges Spike out. Bradshaw’s clothesline kills Richards and he’s gone.

Tazz stops to run his mouth to Heyman and gets dumped by Billy. Test and Kidman put Albert out. We’re down to Bradshaw, Kidman, Gunn, Test and Storm. I’ve missed a bunch of eliminations but most of them weren’t shown. The fall away slam puts Kidman out and we’re down to four. Bradshaw kicks Storm down and might have hurt his ankle. Things slow way down as Billy and Bradshaw hang on for dear life. Storm and Test team up to put Bradshaw out but Test dumps Storm as well. A big boot eliminates Gunn and Test wins immunity.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but at the end of the day, it’s a battle royal so what are you expecting to get? Test would fall through the floor in the next year with no one caring about him at all. This was a pretty big batch of jobbers in there though and that doesn’t really make for an interesting match. Then again, neither do most battle royals.

Sacrifice video by Creed. This was a promotional campaign at the time, with highlight videos set to My Sacrifice by Creed.

Booker is worried about Austin jumping. Shane says it’s ok and stick with it.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Ivory vs. Lita vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jacqueline vs. Jazz

Chyna relinquished the title earlier in the year without being pinned and then disappeared so this is the best we’ve got to pick from for the new champion. This is Jazz’s debut and the fans don’t seem to care. Why does no one care? Because Jazz meant nothing in ECW and was a face there but is a heel here. Mighty Molly is Molly Holly as a superhero. Jazz and Lita start things off with Jazz pounding away. Off to Jackie vs. Molly off some blind tags and somehow even fewer people care about Jackie.

Jackie dropkicks Molly down and it’s off to Ivory who gets caught in a sunset flip for two. This is one fall to a finish. Ivory slingshots Jackie into the ropes and it’s off to Trish for some forearms. Lita gets knocked to the floor and the three Alliance chicks (Ivory, Jazz, Molly) triple team Trish for a bit. Jackie double crosses Lita on Poetry in Motion and everyone hits their finishers on everyone else. The Litasault gets two on Ivory as Jazz saves. Lita gets backdropped to the floor and it’s Ivory vs. Trish left. Stratusfaction gives Trish her first title.

Rating: D. It was short, the match wasn’t any good, Trish looked great in the skin tight barely there pink shorts, Lita looked good as usual, and that’s all I’ve got here. As usual with situations like this, when the previous champion doesn’t lose the title, the new champion comes in at a big disadvantage.

Vince looks at Team WWF and gives them a pep talk, bringing up names like Dr. Jerry Graham, Peter Maivia, Gorilla Monsoon (pop) and Andre the Giant (BIG pop). He understands he might be looking at a group of losers, and if that happens no one will ever forgive them. After listening to that speech, I want to go fight three WWF guys and one guy each from ECW and WCW!

We recap the main event which has been summed up pretty well already. Vince was originally on the team but replaced by Big Show and Rock and Jericho are having major issues. Rock is WCW champion and Austin is WWF Champion. This really does feel like a huge match. The video is set to Control by Puddle of Mudd which fits really well.

Basically Vince said that he was tired of all of the Invasion (as were a lot of fans at this point) and offered one winner take all match with the losing organization going out of business. Angle joined the Alliance after the announcement but Vince says Austin is coming back to the WWF, giving the Alliance reason to be concerned. Austin stunned Angle on TV recently to further that idea.

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

WWF: The Rock, Chris Jericho, Big Show, Undertaker, Kane

Alliance: Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Booker T, Rob Van Dam, Shane McMahon

Everyone gets individual entrances so it takes forever to get to the start of the match. As those are going on, a few things to notice here: Team Alliance has one of the biggest WWF superstars ever, a guy that at this point had only wrestled in the WWF, a WCW guy, an ECW guy, and the then heir to the WWF throne.

Also, as goes the stereotype for the WWF, most of their guys are big and strong instead of the more athletic styles of the Alliance team. One other thing: JR keeps up one of the annoying inaccuracies in wrestling by saying that Undertaker won the World Title in his WWF debut. It was a year later, which you should know if you’ve read this far.

Rock and Austin start fighting before the bell and you know the early advantage doesn’t mean a thing in this one. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle rope elbow for a very early two. Rock comes back with a middle finger elbow of his own and dares Shane to get in. Off to Booker who gets clotheslined down for two as Shane makes the save. Expect to hear that line quite a bit. Off to Jericho as Heyman blames Vince for the end of ECW.

Van Dam and Jericho have a nice fast paced sequence with Jericho hitting a spinwheel kick for no cover. Jericho chops away but misses a dropkick, allowing Rob to hit the cartwheel into a moonsault for two. For reasons likely related to high levels of drug use, Van Dam tries a standing hurricanrana on Jericho, only to be countered into the Walls. Shane makes the third save of the match already and it’s off to Angle vs. Kane.

Angle gets thrown around but eventually slips behind Kane and hits a German Suplex for two. Kane comes back with a side slam and the top rope clothesline for two of his own as Shane saves again. Off to the Dead Man who pounds away but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Booker to get the tag. Undertaker immediately drops Booker and hits a legdrop, but Shane breaks up his fifth near fall of the match.

There’s Old School to Booker followed by that lifting wristlock which always looks painful. Off to a short armed scissors followed by a clothesline for two, resulting in ANOTHER save from Shane. Austin comes in to pound on Undertaker (and causing Heyman to say WHAT after everything JR says) but he gets caught in Old School. Say it with me: Shane makes the save. Undertaker gets caught in the wrong corner and quintuple teamed.

Angle is in next and tries to slug it out with the Dead Man for some reason. Undertaker escapes a German and DDTs Angle down. There’s the tag to Big Show and JR almost immediately bashes him, saying Show can make a huge difference, or he can make some huge mistakes. Show throws around RVD and Angle before clearing off the entire Alliance corner. Angle gets underneath Show and there’s the Slam followed by an Ax kick from Booker (and a Spinarooni) and a Five Star and a top rope elbow from Shane for the first elimination.

Shane dances around in celebration before turning around to meet The Rock who beats the living tar out of Shane with right hands in the corner. Off to Kane for a chokeslam, then a tombstone from Undertaker and a Lionsault from Jericho to tie it up. That’s the best way to go as Show and Shane were the weak links on both teams. Angle vs. Jericho now with Jericho hitting the forearm to start. A double underhook backbreaker puts Angle down but Austin saves.

Angle uses an amateur takedown and brings in Booker to slam Chris a few times. RVD gets a tag but one of his shoulders in the corner is countered into a sunset flip for two. Off to Kane who catches a punch from RVD. Van Dam’s comeback? Kick the guy in the head. Kane pulls Booker in and kicks him in the face too but the numbers game allows Van Dam to take Kane down and hit the Five Star. Rob takes too long to cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam, but Booker kicks Kane. Everything breaks down and Rob kicks Kane from the top for the pin to make it 4-3.

Undertaer pounds on Van Dam in the corner while everyone else is fighting on the floor. Austin and Angle get in as well and Undertaker has to fight all four guys at once. He gets them all in a corner and keeps charging at all of them with clotheslines in a cool sequence. Snake Eyes and a big boot take Angle down and there’s a Last Ride for him as well. Booker comes in with a chair but Undertaker boots him down, leaving himself open to a Stunner from Austin and the pin by Angle. That leaves us with Austin/Angle/Booker/RVD vs. Rock/Jericho.

Booker stomps on Rock but Rocky comes back with right hands. A side kick takes Rock right back down but Rock does the same with a DDT for two. Booker charges into a Samoan Drop for two as Austin makes the save. Rock whips Booker into Angle and grabs a rollup to eliminate Mr. T, making it 3-2.

Rob is in next but as he goes up, Rock kind of powerbombs him off the top for two. Jericho gets the tag and hits a running neckbreaker for two before chopping away in the corner. Van Dam avoids the Lionsault and kicks Chris’ head off, followed by the split legged moonsault for no cover. Jericho pops up and hits a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to tie it up at two each.

Austin slingshots Rock into the post on the floor while Angle and Jericho fight in the ring. Angle picks Jericho’s ankle and stomps away on him as Heyman thinks the Alliance can find a place for the Rock. Back to Austin to pound away on Chris and hit a superplex for two. Austin hits a kind of northern lights/belly to belly suplex for two and here’s Angle again. Jericho puts Kurt in the ankle lock but Kurt quickly escapes and hits a clothesline to take over.

It’s back to Austin for a suplex and an elbow to the face. Angle comes in and stomps away before it’s back to Austin who stomps away as well. We hit one of the few chinlocks in this match as Jericho is in trouble. Jericho fights up and it’s a double tag to bring in Rock vs. Angle with the Great One quickly hooking a Sharpshooter on Kurt for an even faster tap. Heyman LOSES IT in a great moment.

Off to Austin vs. Jericho with Chris trying the Walls but Austin rakes the eyes to escape. Austin can’t put Jericho in the Boston crab either but he gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Steve loads up a superplex but gets shoved down, followed by a missile dropkick for Jericho for two. Austin counters a rollup out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to get us down to Rock vs. Austin.

Rock hits a bad spinebuster but Jericho hits a Breakdown on Rock to take him down in a double cross. It’s not joining the Alliance, but rather just personal hatred. That gets two for Austin andUndertaker comes out to stalk Jericho to the back. Austin pounds away before launching Rock over the top and out to the floor. They fight on the floor with Austin being laid on the table and slapped in the chest over and over.

Austin comes back but gets sent over the announce table and punched in the face by Rock. Back in Rock chops away but gets caught in the whip spinebuster from Austin. Austin puts on a bad Sharpshooter and there’s your Montreal reference. Rock finally makes the rope so Austin grabs the WWF Title. Rock ducks the swing and puts Austin the Sharpshooter but he’s afraid to let go of the belt for some reason. I guess realizing he has a job no matter what, he grabs the rope instead.

Back up and Austin’s Stunner is countered into a Stunner from Rock. Why that puts Rock down after Rock had been in control for awhile is beyond me but whatever. Rock covers but here’s Nick Patrick to pull Hebner out. A Rock Bottom to Patrick is broken up and Austin Rock Bottoms Rock for two. Austin drills Patrick and pulls Hebner back in, only to be sent into him again as Rock counters the Stunner. There’s the Stunner to Rock but there’s no referee. Angle runs in and nails Austin with the title, letting Rock hit the Rock Bottom for the pin and the death of the Alliance. JR to Heyman: “You’re out of work! AGAIN!”

Rating: A. This felt like a main event and was very entertaining too. It runs forty five minutes bell to bell and feels like about half of that. At the end of the day, it was pretty clear what was going to happen but that doesn’t make it a bad match. Rock vs. Austin was pretty much done for a long time after this match, which is the right call as they had run it a lot this year. Great stuff here though.

Everyone celebrates and Vince comes out for the big dramatic pose, because this whole storyline was all about Vince and his kids.

Overall Rating: B+. Like I said, as goes the main event, so goes the show. The rest of the show isn’t bad but the main event is over an hour counting buildup video and entrances and all that jazz. The rest of the show isn’t bad at all with a good cage match and nothing truly bad that didn’t involve Trish looking great, so I can’t complain much here. Also, it gets rid of the Alliance which makes things better already.

As for the Invasion, I could go on at great length, but in short form: it was the biggest waste of time, money, and potential that there ever could be in wrestling. This was the biggest storyline you could possibly ask for and they BLEW IT. There are multiple options you could go with here. One idea is have no mention on TV of the WWF buying WCW and just keep it going with WWF guys in charge behind the scenes. Think a network might have been interested with it being under the direction of the biggest wrestling company ever?

Another option: have the Alliance win. At the end of the day any money they’ve got goes into the WWF’s pocket as they own EVERYTHING, so what difference does it make? Granted that was never going to happen with Vince’s ego, but why let money get in the way of Vince feeling good about himself? The Invasion could have been so much more but it wound up running about five months with the WWF dominating the whole way through. Such a shame and a loss for wrestling fans who had waited for so many years for a chance to have this happen.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Al Snow

Original: C+

Redo: C-

William Regal vs. Tajiri

Original: C

Redo: N/A

Edge vs. Test

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

Original: B+

Redo: B-

Battle Royal

Original: N/A

Redo: C-

Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Jacqueline vs. Ivory vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: D

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

Original: B

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: B+

Like I said, as the main event goes, so goes the show. That’s apparently the case here as I liked both better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/10/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2001-the-end-of-the-alliance-thank-goodness/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2001 (Original): The Final Showdown

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2001
Date: November 18, 2001
Location; Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,142
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

And we have arrived. It’s the end of the Invasion tonight as the main event is Alliance vs. WWF, winner takes all. Naturally the WWF is going to win, but the point was how do we get to that point? It’s a Survivor Series match which at least fits the name of the show and the theme of it. I’ll save my thoughts on the angle as a whole for the end of the review because it’s certainly something that’s historic enough for it’s own thoughts.

Also on the card we have a series of unification matches between the WCW titles and the WWF Titles, but there’s no world title unification match as that would come at Vengeance, in the famous night where Jericho beat Austin and Rock. Oh I almost forgot. HHH is out with injury at this point so he’s not here.

He’ll be back in about two months though to the absolute loudest pop I’ve ever heard. This certainly has the chance to be a good show, but there are several flaws in it that just on paper I can see holding it back from doing so, but maybe I’m wrong. Let’s find out.

For some reason that I don’t get, the poster is Torrie and Lita standing back to back. They look sexy, but what’s the point here?

We open with a very nicely done video package talking about the greatest moments in company history. This does a very good job of showing some of the highlights of the company and tying it in to the current storyline. This was well done.

The theme song for this show is Control by Puddle of Mudd, so that’s all we’ll be hearing all night. That’s a good thing though because it’s a good song. JR and Heyman (Lawler had left the company in February because his wife had been released and he left in protest. The witch left him and he was rehired and would be back next to JR the following night) talk about how this is the biggest PPV of all time. I thought this was 2001, not 1987.

European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow

Christian is in the Alliance at this point, but due to this song and video, he is AWESOME.

Dang that’s awesome. He’s still more or less a comedic guy here, but he’s coming around. I have no idea why he’s with WCW and ECW here, but whatever. Apparently this match was made on Heat, so take that for what it’s worth. Christian cuts a promo before the match, being a basic heel. He says he’s in South Carolina and various things like that. Snow comes out to the Tough Enough music which I always thought was a great song.

Ross gets a great line in about Christian: I’d like to buy him for what he’s worth and sell him for what he thinks he’s worth. That’s not bad at all. More or less this is designed to just give us a good opener as Snow is certainly solid enough to put on a good match. Christian is just ok, so Snow is one of the best choices there was to put in there with him. Naturally all the commentators can talk about is the main event.

For once, I’m ok with that as it really was a big match from a storyline perspective. Snow throws some of the weakest looking punches I’ve ever seen. It’s the most basic move there is and Snow’s are horrible. I’ve never liked that headbutt move that Snow does. I mean the one where he grabs the other guy’s arms and does a series of headbutts. It just looks odd indeed. Ross apparently thinks the back of the head is pretty, as he calls a reverse DDT the Unprettier.

It doesn’t really matter because it didn’t hit but whatever. Actually it does matter because he messes it up again when it hits. Snow hits a quick rollup for two so at least he’s awake. Snow hits the Snow Plow but Christian gets his foot on the rope. Snow looks at the foot but celebrates anyway, setting a fine example for his young wrestlers. The Unprettier ends this a few seconds later.

Rating: C+. Eh, it was there and it didn’t suck. Since it was made an hour ago, how much can they really put together out there? I’m fine with this though as it’s certainly not bad. It’s kind of a weird choice for an opener, but I can see what the point of having it on the show was. Not bad, but certainly nothing great at all here.

Austin is here and the rest of his team is thinking he’ll turn back to the WWF tonight. Vince said that was going to happen tonight, which has everyone in the Alliance panicking. I really hate that name. It doesn’t roll off the tongue at all. Angle and Austin nearly get into it again.

Vince and Linda debate about whether or not they should be worried about tonight. Cole interrupts them in a short sleeved shirt that is just odd looking on him. Speaking of odd, seeing Vince and Linda as a married couple and talking is something I can never remember seeing other than this. It kind of works. Vince more or less says that tonight it’s not a gamble because he has a 6th team member, implying Austin. Regal pops up and says nothing of importance.

William Regal vs. Tajiri

They used to be friends (a long time ago) and then Regal turned heel and beat up Torrie, who was Tajiri’s girlfriend at the time, leading to this. I absolutely love Tajiri’s music. This was supposed to be him vs. X-Pac in a unification match as they were Cruiserweight and Light Heavyweight champions respectively, but Pac was injured. Yeah I was stunned to hear that too.

Regal is freshly heel here, having screwed Angle out of the WWF Title against Austin and becoming Alliance commissioner. There’s just not a lot to talk about in this match as it’s just an intense fight. These guys are hammering the heck out of each other which is nice to see for a change. We get the always cool looking spot of Tajiri (or anyone) getting their head caught between the top and middle ropes.

That’s just sweet every time you see it for some reason. After getting out, Tajiri hits a heck of a kick on the head of Regal. This is a brawl to say the least. And Regal hits a butterfly powerbomb out of nowhere for the pin. Well that was abrupt. Post match Regal beats on him some more and Torrie, rocking some skin tight leather pants, runs out to check on him. Regal beats her up too.

Rating: C. It’s about three minutes long and the finish came out of left field. This should likely be N/A, but the three minutes were rather good with some very hard shots in there. It was good, but that ending was just out of nowhere. Not bad for what they had to work with though so I’ll say it’s ok.

We get a recap of Test vs. Edge, which more or less consists of Test stealing the IC Title from Edge and the Edge winning the US Title. Foley then made a unification match for tonight. It’s very simple, but at least with Test stealing it there’s some history here which is more than you’ll get for most matches in today’s product.

Test is in front of a mirror when Stacy comes up. She implies she’ll sleep with him if he wins after he hits on her. She is so ridiculously hot here it’s not fair.

Edge says that Test is going to lose. He’s ridiculously over at this point as he was on the brink of cracking into the main event and was having the best matches of his career. Unfortunately an injury would put him out for a year in February.

Unification Match: Edge vs. Test

Edge is rocking the Rob Zombie music here, so it’s completely awesome. Edge is over here, but not to the level he would reach once he went to Smackdown exclusively. Hey, did you know that Pat Patterson won the IC Belt in a tournament. Ross advises Edge to use his heart. We’ll ignore the fact that it’s an involuntary muscle and if Edge didn’t use it he would be dead and say that’s good advice as Test really was freakishly strong.

They’re doing that ignore thing, yet Heyman of all people brings the focus back to the title match at hand. Or is it titles match? I’m not sure. Edge really needs to go back to face. It just works better for him. As great as he is as a heel, him as a face is just awesome. This is somewhat back and forth but Test is mainly in control. Ross is once again ticking me off as he’s just running down Heyman while Paul is trying to talk about the match.

Ross actually takes the hint from Paul and talks about Test for a bit. That’s something you don’t see every day. There’s just no drama here at all for some reason. The main reason for that is the match is a lot of punching and kicking so it’s only so interesting. Now we’re getting better here with some nice fast paced kickouts. Test even hits a spear and not a bad one at all. Man he can do more than four moves. Test over Cena apparently.

Anyway, Edge of course kicks out as Heyman talks over and over again about how that’s Edge’s move and Test stole it. The pace speeds up pretty well which gets the crowd into it a lot more. See what happens when you stop just laying around and doing nothing at all? You get a crowd reaction, which is a good thing. Do it more often and you get bigger reactions. That’s basic wrestling psychology, yet sadly enough so many wrestlers don’t get it.

Edge hits the spear and Test kicks out of it as well, and it gets the crowd up and moving even more. I can’t believe it. They’re having more action and it’s getting a better reaction. I’m blown away. Anyway, enough of this sarcastic nonsense, as Test goes for a pumphandle slam and gets rolled up to unify Edge.

Rating: B-. This is a tale of two matches for sure as the beginning was putting me to sleep but it had a strong finish, which is good as it’s the most stuck in the minds of the fans. This was ok, but not much beyond it. I liked it, but I’m a mark for both guys, so therefore it’s unlikely a lot of people would like it. It wasn’t bad, but not great.

Stephanie is worried as Kurt tries to calm her. Stephanie is a bad actress. Like, really bad.

Lita and the Hardys are worried about their match and apparently something is wrong with Matt. This led to a long heel turn for Matt which took nearly a year to pull off. It led to Mattitude though, so it was completely worth it. Lita…yes, in all senses of the word. She runs into Trish coming out of Matt’s locker room. This is before their epic rivalry had really kicked into high gear. Trish in a tight white t-shirt and leather pants is an even bigger yes, if that’s possible. My goodness those are some hot women.

Unification Tag Titles: Hardys vs. Dudleys

This is in a cage by the way. Stacy is managing the Dudleys here and is perhaps the second sexiest she’s ever looked after this same look with glasses. There’s obviously history here but the latest one is from Smackdown where Lita knocked Stacy off the apron and Matt caught her, upsetting Lita. What in the world? What sense does that make? Lita knocks the other chick off and sees Matt beneath her which ticks her off? That is just freaking stupid.

There’s no Lita with the Hardys for no apparent reason, and apparently Matt and Jeff’s dad is a postman. That’s the kind of little trivia we should hear more of. Because this match and era is stupid, you have to tag in and out. Yep, that makes GREAT sense. Jeff is wrestling in a hat because he lives in the moment, whatever that means. Hearing Heyman talk about characters he created is very fun as you can just tell how much he loved ECW. That never gets old.

Excellent shot of Stacy’s camouflaged shorts. In another thing that the announcers (read as Heyman) does well here is point out that Matt and Jeff are the hometown boys. I didn’t catch that and that’s the commentator’s job: point out the little things like that which we might forget. Anyone that ever says that the Divas aren’t beautiful is a freaking idiot. Sorry they just keep showing Stacy and this tagging in and out thing is freaking stupid.

After five or six minutes we FINALLY do something with the cage. To be fair the wrestling is pretty good, but it just makes me wonder what the point of the cage is. Heyman saying WHAT A RUSH makes me chuckle. Jeff tries to escape but it fails as the heels are completely dominating. This is a rather long stretch of the heels dominating which is common in tag team cage matches.

I’m just waiting on the slam of one of those Dudleys into the cage to swing the momentum into the home town boys’ favor. For some reason I think of the Dukes of Hazard when I think of the Hardys. That just popped into my head and I have no idea why. And there’s our stupid heel moment to change the match. Jeff is down in the middle of the ring and both Dudleys go to a top rope. The tagging aspect has been forgotten at this point as it should be.

D-Von misses the headbutt because Jeff rolls out of the way. That’s fine as it’s pretty much the only counter there is to that move. Bubba, ever the genius though, jumps anyway because he’s so much faster than D-Von and he crashes too. Matt takes them both down with a double clothesline and we’re reversed with the faces now in control. Eventually Bubba calls out for a table, which Stacy pulls out.

She shows part of her shapely figure to the referee and picks his pocket to get the table in. That was at least simplistic. Matt gets out and it’s 2-1. D-Von gets thrown into the cage, and Ross says it doesn’t taste like chocolate. Allow me to ask again; WHERE DOES HE COME UP WITH THIS STUFF? And I don’t ask that because it’s funny or witty. I ask that because it MAKES NO FREAKING SENSE! Anyway, Matt is out and D-Von is on the table while Jeff is alone on the top of the cage.

You know what’s coming next. Instead of climbing down, the future 3 time world champion misses the Swanton off the cage and crashes to allow the Dudleys to get the easy pin. Matt isn’t happy, and he’s right. That was SO STUPID. Ross saying Jeff couldn’t resist the temptation is much more ironic than it should be.

Rating: B+. This would be an A if they hadn’t had the tagging thing, but I think it’s getting upgraded because of it. I had this as a B but the more I think about it the more I think that the tagging part at the beginning helped it a lot.

It made me think that in the middle where they just stopped doing it that the thought process was this is too important so screw tagging, let’s just get it all out there. That’s the beauty of a slow build: it makes the payoff much sweeter. Considering how many times these teams have fought, to still be able to have a good match is impressive.

Foley is at WWF New York where he isn’t happy about not being at the show. He points out that as Commissioner he should be there but Vince told him not to, so the Commissionership is a joke. This was part of an angle where Foley pretty much hated his job which he got back after Vince fired him.

He would be gone very soon, with this possibly being his last night in the role. After a little research, I’m right, as other than I think being on Raw the next night in a pretaped segment, he wouldn’t be back until June of 2003 as a guest referee.

Scotty is heading to the ring when he runs into Test. Scotty is actually a freaking jerk to him and gets the beating he deserves. Not because of being a jerk, but because Test wants his spot in the battle royal. My goodness Test and Stephanie need some acting lessons.

Immunity Battle Royal

Simple concept here: since the losing company goes out of business, the winner of this match can’t be fired for a year. First of all, how sweet of a rule would that be? You have a year where you can do whatever the heck you want and no one can say a word about it. The winner of this tries to do that, but it didn’t work out that well. I’ll do what I can to list the participants as they all come out in clusters according to their company affiliation.

Note: the Alliance comes out to Bodies by Drowning Pool. If you’re a fan of that kind of music and have a chance to go see them, go out of your way to do so. The live performance I saw of that song is without a doubt the greatest live song I have ever heard. The girl I was with at the show looked at each other and said in unison: that freaking rocked. They were just an awesome live band and second to only 3 Doors Down (who had light years better production values to be fair) as best I’ve ever seen.

Anyway, while this awesome song plays, we have Justin Credible, Lance Storm (who come out next to each other which is awesome looking for any true ECW fans), Shawn Stasiak, DDP, Raven, Dreamer, some guy I don’t recognize that might be Stevie Richards, Billy Kidman, Hurricane and Test for the Alliance. For the WWF, APA, Crash, Funaki, Saturn, Chuck Palumbo, Hardcore Holly, Albert, Billy Gunn and Spike. My eyesight isn’t that good.

I found a list online about halfway through. For some reason in case you’re wondering, the WWF comes out to Control, the show’s theme song. Stasiak is gone in about two seconds after charging at Bradshaw and being thrown out. Test drops to the floor and fights Albert who never got in for some reason. Something tells me this is going to be hard to call, which is partially why I’m terrified of the Rumbles.

Tazz comes out, ticking off Heyman. Tazz had left the Alliance because he hated Austin and his leadership. So far it’s your standard battle royal formula of people throwing punches, kicks and knees while trying to throw a single person over for about five minutes to look like they’re really doing something while not doing anything at all.

Grego….Hurricane I mean, gets knocked the heck out by Bradshaw and the clothesline. Albert launches Saturn out. For the life of me I’ll never understand why in such a civilized country as ours there’s still so much bald on bald violence. And they’re both from Boston. What are the odds? I’ll also never get why Albert never got a harder push. The guy had all the tools to be a solid heel, so why didn’t it work? Give him a manager and it would have gone fine.

He’s not someone that needs a lot of story behind him. He’s just a big scary looking dude. What more could you ask for? People are going out rather fast now as it’s mainly just dead weight in there that no one cares about. For the life of me I will never get why Billy Gunn got so many freaking pushes. They never ended and they never worked. The Outlaws got over, but Road Dogg was the more important part.

When you think of that team, what’s the first thing in your head? Road Dogg and the catchphrase. Billy’s line was made popular by DX, not him. I think there’s seven left at this point. As best I can tell it’s Richards, Kidman, Billy, Tazz, Bradshaw,, Test and Albert. There goes Richards so we’re down to six. Lance Storm is in there as well. Tazz yells at Heyman and he’s thrown out. In a cool spot, Bradshaw gets rid of Kidman with a fallaway slam over the top rope. That was sweet looking.

The final four are Test, Gunn, Storm and Bradshaw. Bradshaw misses a boot to Storm’s head by about six inches and hurts his leg which I think is legit. He actually hits a neckbreaker that was good though. For some reason the announcers are arguing about Stephanie. The final two are Test and Billy, with Test kicking the tar out of him to win it.

The only problem was that it was obvious given the Scotty segment earlier, but that’s what was expected. Heyman does a very funny bit where he explains what the repercussions of the match are like this: “So no matter what happens, *whispers* the Alliance will win, Test will not be fired no matter what (the Alliance will win!). It’s much funnier than it sounds.

Rating: N/A. I’m going with no rating because it’s a battle royal. How do you grade that? The ending was obvious, but it’s a battle royal. Other than the Rumble, they’re more or less the same, so what do you want me to say?

Now we have a completely random video package of clips of mainly the ten guys in the main event. This is totally out of context and the song has no words or build up to it. It’s just a three minute video of the feud with no words or anything. It’s also the video….OH! This is the WWF Desire videos that they used to run. The original song was My Sacrifice by Creed, but I’m guessing they were way too expensive.

At the time Creed was the hottest thing in the world so that makes sense. The Desire videos were a series of videos that they made attempting to show how important wrestling was. They sound clichéd but they really were freaking sweet at the time and still are. Check them out as they’re worth it. The song fits really well too.

Shane and Booker speculate about whether they can trust Austin or not as we have another few minutes to fill. My only guess is that this is an intermission or something. It’s been about 6-7 minutes since the last match ended. Is there a point to this?

Women’s Title: Trish vs. Jackie vs. Lita vs. Ivory vs. Molly vs. Jazz

Trish’s legs are possibly better than Stacy’s. That’s saying a freaking ton. And now we get to look at Jackie. I can’t stand her. Lita gets a HUGE pop. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it here now: Trish vs. Lita is one of the best feuds I’ve ever seen regardless of gender. It’s the best natural rivalry I’ve seen other than Bret vs. Shawn, which is saying a lot. Molly’s theme music can introduce herself as the song says “Holy sidekicks Hurricane! It’s Mighty Molly”, just as she’s being introduced.

Jazz is debuting here and might as well be the black Chyna. The problem: no one had a clue who she was and she got zero reaction. The rules here are that there are four on the apron and two in the ring so there you go. Ivory and Jackie try to do a nice technical sequence and it just fails in every sense of the word. Trish’s shorts…my goodness that’s not right. More or less it’s a bikini bottom but skin tight.

Other than Lita these women pretty much sucked in the ring. They’re the stereotypical “good” divas that can’t do jack in the ring but we’re told they can and somehow they’re considered good which shows just how weak the division is. We get a Lita chant as naturally everything falls apart and it’s just a wild finisher fest. Trish and the heavenly form send Jazz to the floor and it’s Ivory vs. Trish, who hits the bulldog for the title.

This was her first reign and the first champion after Ivory. She was a complete underdog at this point so this was shocking. Obviously she would improve massively, but this was a big shock. As we transition to the main event, Ross gets a gay joke in about Heyman that surprises me. He says he wouldn’t mind Trish coming into him from behind. I listened to it twice to make sure I didn’t understand it and that’s what he actually said.

Rating: D+. This was a mess, but the looks of Trish and Lita make it pass. It was there for the T & A anyway so who cares. The ending was about as low a level of being historic as you can get while still being historic, so this is technically important, but yeah, it’s about the looks, plain and simple.

After Ross and Heyman bicker like two year olds, Vince addresses his team. We have Big Show, Kane, Taker, Jericho and Rock, with Taker getting a good pop and Rock getting a bit one as he jumps around looking like an idiot. He talks about how if they lose tonight, they will be an embarrassment to everyone and no one will forgive them.

He goes on to list off some names in company history that they would be letting down, including Buddy Rogers (no reaction), Gorilla Monsoon (BIG pop), Andre the Giant (Big pop as he’s looking straight at Taker, bringing about more symbolism than should be allowed), and High Chief Peter Maivia to no reaction at all as I don’t think most people knew who he was. He says forget about Austin tonight.

Jericho just looks out of place there next to Rock and the big three. Also, how appropriate it is to have three super heavyweights given Vince’s affinity for big power guys. Vince was supposed to be on this team but he gave his spot to Big Show, which I like. Vince isn’t a wrestler and for once he makes it about the wrestlers and not him. That’s a good thing. This was a really good speech actually.

Team Alliance (Austin, Booker, RVD, Angle, Shane) come down the hall. Austin is WWF champion and Rock is WCW champion at this point. Let’s hit the recap button for this as the teams might need some explaining, but not a ton. Vince said he had enough of the Invasion and threw out the challenge for this match, which Stephanie and Shane (the owners of ECW and WCW respectively) agreed to.

There’s three main points to this match. First, Angle turned on Vince and the WWF to join the Alliance. Second, Rock and Jericho hate each other, which is a nice touch. Finally, the Alliance doesn’t trust Austin. As for Austin joining the team, it made little sense when he jumped because he said the Alliance guaranteed him the best matches that he could get. By joining them, wouldn’t he be fighting the same guys he had been fighting for years?

Isn’t that saying that the WWF guys are better than the Alliance guys? Or am I reading too much into this? We get a very good video package showing all of the ten people fighting each other, which sounds simple but it’s better than it sounds. It ends with a shot of Austin and Rock, which is the feud in a nutshell.

Team Alliance vs. Team WWF

After literally ten minutes of introductions, we’re ready to go. Stephanie dancing to Booker’s music was either funny, hot, or just plain sad. I can’t decide. Immediately it’s Rock vs. Austin, which makes sense I suppose as they’re the real core of this feud. Before you get any other ideas, this isn’t WWF vs. Alliance. It’s a WWF angle, plain and simple. Both guys hit the Thesz Press and the F you elbow with Shane saving Austin despite him not particularly needing it.

Booker vs. Rock follows as we redo Summerslam from this year. Booker was the WCW Rock, complete with the catchphrase to open his song, the People’s Champion mantra, and the finishing move. And that is reason 384 why WCW failed. I need to make a list of that someday. Shane saves Booker this time, so at least that makes sense. WCW violence erupts as Jericho beats up Booker for a bit.

Ross and Heyman argue over who put ECW out of business which is amusing, mainly because according to storyline purposes it’s still in business but whatever. RVD gets a pop and a half. Jericho and Van Dam have a good little match here, as Jericho is wrestling his light weight style which is where I always thought he was best. Today he tends to use the heavyweight style which just doesn’t work that well for me. Jericho hooks the Walls on a counter and Heyman is PANICKING.

Shane of course makes the save though. After a double tag it’s Kane vs. Angle which is an interesting match to say the least. Angle was in between stages in his career here as he’s somewhere between All American good boy and rampaging psycho that knows more ways to hurt people that should be legal. He had recently made Kane tap and Angle Slammed Big Show, so obviously he was on a role at the moment.

Also, this was just after he and Austin had finished an awesome feud with Angle hitting levels of intensity in promo cutting that I didn’t know existed. Those two beat the living tar out of each other, throwing each other all over the place with suplex after suplex in something that was just plain awesome. And because this is pro wrestling they’re friends a month later. Just as I say this, Angle gets a sweet German on Kane. Shane saves Angle as that’s number four.

Now we’re up to Taker and Angle, which is nothing short of a classic most of the time except for when it’s not. Taker hits a sweet kick to Booker’s head to take him down, and of course Shane makes the save again. It makes sense if nothing else though, as he’s the guy with everything to lose. Taker goes for Old School as evidenced by shouting OLD SCHOOL! I really don’t get the point of him doing that. It’s not like he used a wristlock that often.

After Shane makes another save to save us from Booker and Taker’s slow period, Austin comes in. The fans are still way into him, which goes to show how popular he was. Austin vs. Taker really was an epic rivalry. It’s kind of reminiscent of Hogan and Andre when you think about it. You have the big vocal face of the company vs. the guy that’s great but stays in the background most of the time. It’s a simple story but it goes in depth once you look into it a bit.

After the second Old School in about three minutes, Shane…oh screw it you know what he does by now. Taker just starts punching the tar out of Angle which never gets old. Heyman finally does what everyone has wanted to do for years and asks JR what the deal is with his obsession with taking men to the woodshed. Ross has nothing to say as Big Show comes in for the first time, rocking that one piece swimsuit he used to wear.

Naturally he lasts about a minute as an Angle Slam, axe kick, 5 Star and a Shane elbow drop end him to make it 5-4. Can the forces of evil really overcome the forces of good? Heck if I know as there’s at least half an hour left in this match. In a funny moment after the pin, Shane is dancing around celebrating as Rock is waiting on him. The Alliance guys point it out to him and he slowly stops dancing before turning around and looking scared. That was great.

Rock’s punches seem to miss by about a mile to me, but maybe I’m missing something. After a Kane chokeslem, a Taker tombstone and a Lionsault, we’re tied up. Heyman as usual is priceless during this. Angle comes in now as we need a spatula for Shane. I love how Heyman is freaking despite the fact that Shane got the same treatment that Show got earlier. Also I love how he complains about how stupid Show is, despite him taking Show in as the ECW Champion in about five years.

It’s Angle vs. Jericho now in another match that has a natural rivalry that I’ll never get tired of watching. I’ve come to the conclusion that Booker is just flat out boring. He’s been in there about three times now and he’s just killed the momentum every single time. He’s slow and boring, which is a bad combination to consist of.

Ross points out the same thing I noticed earlier about how the WWF is mainly power, which makes sense as most of the Alliance guys are finesse or technical guys, which is either a very subtle and nice touch, or a complete coincidence. The WWF team beats up RVD, prompting Heyman to say he believes they’re trying to isolate him. Well thank you very much for that. I never would have noticed.

Booker and RVD are in at the same time with Kane, who naturally gets no help from his partners because, you know, that would be helpful. Van Dam had pinned Kane and Taker this past week, so he’s hot right now which is kind of a joke considering Kane is in there, but it wasn’t that funny. I need to work on my comedy more I think.

The Five Star (which is still the most amazing live move I’ve ever seen) hits but Kane grabs Van Dam by the throat, leading to Booker running in, which leads to the massive brawl that you knew was coming. During the fracas, Van Dam hits a kick from the top to eliminate Kane. In a cool moment, Taker has one member of the Alliance in each of the corners and keeps them there by running back and forth, clotheslining them all in order.

He does about eight clotheslines in a row before knocking Booker to the floor. Angle takes a Last Ride but Booker comes in with a chair. Taker knocks him down but walks into the Stunner. Angle is dragged over and despite not being legal, gets the pin. That takes us down to Rock and Jericho vs. Austin, Booker, RVD and Angle. Dang that’s a lot of gold between six guys. Booker kicks/knees the tar out of Rock.

Rock hits a DDT and covers Booker but it doesn’t work, which it shouldn’t have any way as Booker’s shoulder was about right inches off the mat. Booker is thrown into Angle, allowing him to be rolled up to make it 3-2. I like that actually, as it’s not something stupid and it actually makes sense for Booker to go out that way.

Rock hooks a cool move on Van Dam as RVD’s back was to the Great One and Rock more or less powerbombs him down, but does it with one arm so it’s like a roll up from the top which gets two. Jericho is finally back in and they nearly botch a spot, but Jericho makes a last second save to turn it into a swinging neckbreaker. That was nice. In a sequence that’s just flat out awesome due to what it means now.

Jericho avoids a split legged moonsault and hits the Breakdown for the pin on Van Dam, which looked awful because Van Dam dropped to a knee so the move got ZERO reaction. The reason it’s cool is Van Dam missed what is now Morrison’s finisher to get caught in Miz’s finisher. That’s awesome and one of the biggest reasons I love watching old wrestling. You get to see stuff like that which wouldn’t have meant a thing eight years ago but now is kind of cool, or at least it is to me.

Who would have guessed it would come down to the four guys that have been fighting on both sides? We have two fights going on at once, with Austin hitting a slingshot on Rock, who of course oversells by more or less throwing a flying headbutt into the post. Heyman says they can find a spot for Rock if nothing else for his t-shirt sales.

We move to Austin vs. Jericho which is a feud that could have been great but never happened, I guess due to a generation gap. I think I might see why now as they badly botch a spot and the bad attempt at a save just fails miserably.

Jericho and Angle are in there now and Jericho hooks the ankle lock as we continue to shame the history of Ken Shamrock, who would win the TNA World Title in about nine months. Actually it was the NWA World Title at the time, but it was exclusive to TNA so whatever. The heels take their time beating on Jericho which at least makes sense. It’s fairly slow and boring, but it’s working to an extent I suppose.

We get a double hot tag to give us Rock vs. Angle. Rock hits the awful belly to belly to set up the even worse Sharpshooter to which Angle shockingly taps. More on that later. Since Rock is a jackass, he won’t let go until Austin knocks him off. Heyman’s panicking is just great here. Jericho can’t get the Walls, but Austin does of all things, but they last about a second. Austin is bleeding, and of course it’s profusely since it’s PPV.

Since it hasn’t been mentioned all match, we suddenly remember that Austin might be jumping, despite Vince saying it was nonsense. Austin counters Jericho’s roll up into one of his own, and wouldn’t you know it, the final two are Rock and Austin. For the life of me, I NEVER would have seen this as the final two. Ok that’s a lie but whatever. As Austin and Rock are getting going, Jericho hits Rock with the Breakdown, which technically should be a DQ.

Actually it shouldn’t be since it’s his own team so never mind. Rock naturally kicks out. Jericho heads back to the ring but Taker comes out for the save. That’s a feud that sadly never happened. They just had their first match in September of this year. That’s saying a lot. If Rock ever sold any big spot properly I think I’d have a heart attack. I get the point in doing it, but it’s just way too much most of the time, at least in my eyes.

They fight to the floor and land in the most famous of all places. Rock lands some punches square in the shoulder of Austin which for some reason keep him down. Ross and Heyman are just laying into each other on commentary and it’s great. I have no issue with the announcers being biased in circumstances like this. Austin hooks a bad Sharpshooter because we have to have a Montreal reference at every major show in history.

Austin isn’t even leaning back on it so it just looks like Rock has his legs up. There’s no heat on the move at all from the crowd because it looks so awful and no one buys that Rock is in a lot of pain at all. A belt shot from Austin misses and it’s the third bad Sharpshooter of the night. Dang is this some golden edition of the Montreal reference package or something? It’s a sad thing when Rock’s Sharpshooter is better than someone else’s but that’s the case here.

In a cool scene, Austin has the WWF belt and is holding onto it as he tries to get to the ropes. For once, Ross points something out and says being champion is Austin’s life and is the reason he won’t tap. That’s ridiculous because it’s been made clear that champions won’t get fired, but at least Ross is trying. In a stupid thing, Austin gets the ropes but Rock pulls him away, so Hebner keeps checking for the submission. Yeah that makes a lot of sense.

On the second time though Earl makes him break it. What’s the point of that? Y am I wasting my time trying to figure this out? Since it’s Rock vs. Austin, Rock hits a Stunner, allegedly on the inventor of it, but I don’t see Mikey Whipwreck anywhere. Nick Patrick runs out to pull Hebner out to prevent the three as Heyman says he’s a licensed official.

For some reason the idea of taking the test for your refereeing license amuses me. What’s the test like? If you mess up more than three counts you don’t pass? Do you have to learn how many taps there are in a proper tap out? Ok it’s not as funny as I thought it was. Austin hits a Rock Bottom of his own but of course he kicks out. Austin beats up Patrick, because that’s just what he does.

Since it’s a major PPV, Hebner goes down. Rock takes another Stunner and amazingly only oversells a bit. There’s no referee though as I wonder why Vince doesn’t just call for the bell on his own. It’s his show, so it’s not like it would be mind blowing. Angle runs out and screws the Alliance by hitting Austin with the belt straight into the Rock Bottom for the perfectly timed conscious Hebner to end the Alliance. The crowd was electric over this.

Heyman is at a loss for words, which shows how huge of a moment this is. Ross screams that Heyman is out of work AGAIN, which is great. Fink’s announcement of the winning organization is absolutely perfect. Stephanie is crying badly as the WWF guys are celebrating. What I meant earlier was that Angle was apparently sent into the Alliance by Vince, and it turned out that Angle, not Austin, was the one that would turn all along.

This wound up ticking off Taker, setting up his heel turn and massive haircut. Oh look, it’s Vince to take credit for something that he played absolutely zero part in. It’s good to know that some things never change. The sight of Vince holding up his arms in triumph in a WCW town no less takes us out.

Rating: B. The two problems here are very obvious. First of all, there was zero chance that the WWF would lose. Second, it was beyond obvious that it would come down to Austin vs. Rock in their I guess 23rd PPV ending fight. The match itself is good if not very good, but there’s just no drama whatsoever, which they clearly tried to put in by having Jericho and Rock against four guys and then Jericho screwing Rock.

Even still though, the ending was never once in doubt. I get that it had to be that way, but they booked themselves into a huge corner here and it showed badly. I don’t think this could have been a classic, but it was about as good as it could have been.

As for what happens after this, the next PPV, Vengeance, would be the famous night where Jericho beat Rock and Austin in one night for the first ever Undisputed Title. Allegedly that was supposed to go to HHH but he wasn’t completely healed yet. He would take the belt from Jericho at Mania. Also, tomorrow night Flair would show up as the person that bought up Shane and Stephanie’s stock and became co-owner in a shocker.

That would eventually lead to the Brand Split which still defines the company to this day. As for the rest of them, nothing of note happened at all. Naturally the major stars of the Alliance stayed while a lot of the weaker guys became jobbers. The Brand Split really did help a lot of issues as it saved a lot of jobs. Who cares that the fans hated it? Since when have we cared what they think? Oh and on a final random note, Lawler would be back tomorrow on Raw.

Overall Rating: C+. The problem with this show as a hole is simple: other than the main event, not a thing mattered. No one cared about anything but the Survivor Series match. While the other stuff is technically important, no one cared and that’s all there was to it. The show is good enough, but the lack of drama just kills it. If it were me, I would have waited at least another six months for this, but granted I wasn’t around for it and there could have been outside factors.

I can’t imagine what they could have been, but they might have existed. The show is worth checking out for the historic aspect, but I’d say just check out the cage match and the main event, because other than that the show is completely forgettable. I barely remembered anything about the card at all when I watched it if that tells you anything. Not really recommended, but it’s not bad enough to recommend to avoid.

Ok, so now that the show is over, my thoughts on the Invasion as a whole. Clearly it wasn’t what it could have been had they been patient and waited about another year to have Hogan, Nash, Flair, Goldberg and I guess RVD out there. Flair showed up on Raw the next night, Hall, Nash and Hogan in February, so it’s not like these guys were an eternity away. But that’s not the biggest issue I see in why it failed. Take a look at Team Alliance for this show.

We have Austin, Angle, Booker, RVD and Shane. In other words, three WWF guys and one each from ECW and WCW. That’s where this show and plan falls apart on all levels. This never was about WWF vs. ECW or WCW. It was about putting down the other two companies to stroke Vince’s ego even more which is evidenced at the end of the show. Vince celebrating is the last thing you see, as it’s his moment again rather than the company’s or the wrestlers’.

That’s why the company is in the shape it’s in now: it’s all about Vince. Think about all the bad comedy angles that go on, especially with the guest hosts. It’s because Vince has no idea what’s funny anymore. He’s mainly on Raw and that’s where the stupid stuff happens. Smackdown and ECW are well written, action-oriented shows, which is what they’re supposed to be.

On paper this looks awesome, but with so few people that actually make sense in this, there was just no way it could work. It could have worked had it been given more time and effort, but there’s just no way to pull off what should have been the biggest storyline of all time in six months, plain and simple.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

 




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2000 (2019 Redo): He Broke HHH

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2000
Date: November 19, 2000
Location: Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 18,602
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s old school time and as luck would have it, we’re going with something from one of the best eras the company has ever had. Steve Austin is back from his neck surgery and going after the mastermind behind his attack with another match against HHH. At the same time, we have the Rock vs. Rikishi, who famously did it for da Rock. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at HHH being the mastermind, which was the best thing they could have done after the big question mark of picking Rikishi. See, back then they saw when something wasn’t working and FIXED THEIR MISTAKE. I know that’s a foreign concept these days but it really did happen back in the day.

T&A/Trish Stratus vs. Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly

This is before Trish was a wrestler, Molly is still the wholesome Holly cousin and Blackman is Hardcore Champion. Blackman strikes away at Albert to start as JR actually recaps the story for this one, because this match actually has a backstory: the APA went on vacation and left Crash in charge of the office so T&A took over.

See how easy it can be to give what would be an otherwise ice cold match a backstory? And how weird it is for the faces to be in the bottom right hand corner of the ring? How did WWE even manage to have a designated face and heel corner in modern times? Crash’s high crossbody is pulled out of the air so Blackman dropkicks him in the back for a save. Trish comes in but kicks Albert low by mistake, allowing Crash to bring Molly in.

The chase gives us a double tag to Crash and Test with a hurricanrana giving Crash two. Test’s pumphandle slam is broken up as Crash rams him into Albert and it’s off to Molly to beat up Trish. Test pulls Molly down by the hair but she is fine enough to suplex Trish with ease. Crash has to save Molly from a gorilla press but Trish grabs the middle rope bulldog for two. Back up and Molly hits a middle rope sunset flip to put Trish away at 5:03 with Lawler losing his mind as she nearly falls out of her top.

Rating: C-. Today this would have been a Kickoff Show match but that doesn’t mean it was bad. Instead what we had was a match that didn’t overstay its welcome and had a fast enough pace that it still worked. Molly was the best choice for the pin and it’s not like Trish getting pinned is going to hurt her. The more I watch Molly the more impressed I am with her as she can do so many different things. Here she’s almost the All American girl and she would be doing her chaste stuff just over a year later before becoming kind of a hybrid. That takes talent, which she certainly has.

Kurt Angle comes up to Edge and Christian in the back but they have their own match tonight and can’t help Angle against Undertaker. Oh and Christian ate some bad chili and came down with mono. Angle: “You guys with your crazy antics.” He just wanted them to go out and celebrate, as long as he can find non-alcoholic beer.

Earlier today, Low Down and Tiger Ali Singh weren’t on the security entry list. This really shouldn’t come as a surprise.

Radicalz vs. Billy Gunn/Chyna/K-Kwik/Road Dogg

Survivor Series match and it’s so bizarre to see R-Truth here nineteen years ago in a different enough character. Gunn and Chyna may have a bit of romance going on but it isn’t clear. Terri is here with the Radicalz, Malenko is Light Heavyweight Champion and Eddie is Intercontinental Champion. Gunn hammers on Saturn to start and it’s Chyna coming in for a double suplex.

A powerslam gives Chyna two but the handspring elbow is countered into a waistlock. You don’t do that to Chyna, who kicks Saturn low, knocks Eddie off the apron and hits a DDT on Saturn. Everything breaks down and Eddie hits Chyna with the Intercontinental Title for the pin at 2:33.

That takes away a lot of the fans’ interest in the match, even as Dogg gets beaten up for a change. Eddie starts in on the knee so it’s time to talk about the World Title match instead of what’s going on here. Dogg catches Eddie on top with a superplex, allowing the tag off to Gunn. The tilt-a-whirl slam and sleeper drop get rid of Eddie at 6:01 to even things up as WWE keeps trying to make the Gunn singles push a thing.

Malenko and Kwik come in with the latter flipping around but getting driven into the corner for a tag to Benoit. A headscissors takes Benoit down but it’s a heck of a bridging German suplex to get rid of Kwik at 7:19. Dogg comes in and gets beaten up in the corner as well as Lawler tries to figure out why JR is talking about an accordion. Malenko gets two off a suplex but Dogg hits Saturn in the head to get a breather.

Saturn is right back with the northern lights suplex to get rid of Dogg, leaving us with Saturn/Benoit/Malenko vs. Gunn. The Radicalz waste no time in beating Gunn down in the corner and a cheap shot from Saturn makes it even worse. Saturn misses a superkick on the floor and hits Benoit by mistake (or he got close at least with a camera cut making the save), leaving Malenko to take the Fameasser for the pin at 10:58.

The Jackhammer gets two on Saturn but Benoit slams Gunn down and drops the Swan Dive for his own two. Gunn fights back with an elbow to the face and Benoit gets knocked to the apron. That means a suplex back inside but Saturn pulls the leg and holds it down to give Benoit the pin at 12:41.

Rating: D+. Pretty uninspired match here but the Radicalz winning was the only way to go. The team had been around for a long time now and it would be ridiculous to have them lose to the remnants of DX. The match wasn’t even any good with the Radicalz easily picking the team apart, mainly because it was the former Outlaws, Chyna and R-Truth.

Rock wouldn’t talk to Lilian Garcia as he arrived.

Chris Jericho thought is issues with Kane started over some spilled coffee but it is more complicated than that. It is about a man who looks in the mirror and sees the evil monster inside. Jericho is talking about himself though and he’s ready to prove that to Kane.

We recap Kane vs. Jericho, the latter of whom spilled coffee on Kane and made a reference to burning. Kane wasn’t happy and started torturing Jericho, including throwing him through a window and chokeslamming him onto the announcers’ table.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho has a bad back coming in from the attacks. They slug it out to start with Kane getting the better of it as the Y2J chants start up. The dropkick puts Kane on the floor and the dive barely connects as Jericho’s foot gets caught on the rope. The springboard dropkick knocks Kane back to the floor as it’s a lot of getting in the shots that he can so far. Back in and Kane drops him face first onto the mat as we hit the monster stretch.

A belly to back suplex is countered and Jericho hammers away, only to get his head clotheslined off. Jericho gets choked over Kane’s back and the announcers continue to do a good job of selling the David vs. Goliath aspect here. A turnbuckle pad comes off and Kane goes to send Jericho face first into the steel (because Jericho is handsome and Kane hates anyone who isn’t a freak) but a raised foot is enough for the block. Instead Kane sends him to the floor and into various things, which is what monsters tend to do.

Back in and Jericho crotches him on top, gets shoved down, but still manages to dropkick Kane out of the air. A basement dropkick sets up a missile dropkick for two and the Walls go on. The rope is grabbed after a long stretch that didn’t have a lot of drama, mainly because Jericho was barely cranking on the thing. Jericho pulls him back and tries again but gets kicked in the face this time. The bulldog into the Lionsault (with Kane having to scoot over about a foot and a half) is blocked with a grab of the throat though and there’s the chokeslam for the pin at 12:35.

Rating: C. The ending would have been better had Kane not been so out of place at first but the rest wasn’t exactly great. For some reason I never got into this one and it just didn’t have that much drama. I do like Kane winning as it gives us a reason to keep things going, and this is the kind of thing that can go on for a bit.

Terri comes in to see the Radicalz and tells them that HHH is in the building and he’ll meet with them later. Laughter ensues.

European Title: William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Regal is defending in a match that was set up on Heat. Before the match, Regal mocks the Florida fans for not being able to elect a new President or understand something as basic as manners. Holly’s music cuts him off and I don’t think that counts as good manners either. Holly starts fast and hammers away but Regal goes with the wrestling by turning it into a lockup.

Regal pulls him chest first into the middle buckle and starts cranking on the arm, which had been broken earlier in the year and kept Holly on the shelf. Holly gets sent face first into the mat with a wristlock and Regal kneels down onto the arm again. A cross armbreaker keeps Holly in trouble until he manages a crossbody for a breather. Holly gets his arms tied in the ropes but manages to get free and knock Regal down. Sick of the wrestling thing, Holly grabs the title and hits Regal in the head for the DQ at 5:47.

Rating: D+. This felt like it was thrown in to fill time and odds are that is what they were doing. Holly got beaten up the entire time and then got disqualified in the end, which felt like more of a heel move than anything else. Just not very interesting of a match and it didn’t seem important either.

Trish comes in to see Angle and offers her, ahem, assistance tonight. He appreciates it but she can tell Test and Albert that he’s got Undertaker tonight. Kurt: “See you later!”

We recap the Rock vs. Rikishi. Last year, Rikishi ran over Steve Austin and accused Rock of telling him to do it. That wasn’t true though, with Rikishi saying that he did it for Rock because people like them weren’t going to get a shot in this company. Rock beat him up so Rikishi, with the help of real mastermind HHH, crushed Rock’s chest with a sledgehammer.

Rock vs. Rikishi

Rock has a bad chest coming in and charges in to hammer away. The Samoan drop (more like a backdrop) lets Rock grab a chair but the referee pulls it away, allowing Rikishi to superkick him down. Rock’s right hands don’t get him very far as Rikishi slams him right back down to take over again. Rikishi gets sent outside and his head goes into the steps….which shouldn’t hurt him.

It doesn’t seem to be that bad and Rikishi is back with a ram into the timekeeper’s bell. The ref gets bumped (of course) so it’s time to grab the sledgehammer. Since Rikishi is a bad villain (like, a really bad one), he takes so long that Rock can hit a Rock Bottom for a very delayed two. A headbutt to the chest puts Rock down and another one to the head has him rolling around in pain.

There’s another Samoa drop and Rikishi sits on his chest for two. Rikishi crushes him in the corner and gets in the Stinkface, which is the kind of embarrassment you don’t get from Rock too often. The hard clothesline turns Rikishi inside out and there’s a spinebuster, which only hurts the chest again. He’s fine enough to hit the People’s Elbow for the very delayed pin at 11:19.

Rating: C. Thank goodness, as having Rikishi beat the Rock would have been as ridiculous as having Rikishi be the big bad in a major storyline. This was as good as it was going to be and even then it was just a simple injury story. Rikishi is not believable in this spot and that is painfully obvious. At least he lost here, but it isn’t making this any less of a head scratcher.

Post match Rikishi superkicks him again and hits FOUR Banzai Drops. So yeah this is going to continue. Lucky us.

Raven is at WWF New York.

Steve Austin arrives. Dude it’s an hour and twenty minutes into the show. That’s bad even for you.

HHH and the Radicalz aren’t concerned so here’s Commissioner Mick Foley to say the Radicalz are banned from ringside and the match is now No DQ. HHH still doesn’t seem to mind.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Lita

Ivory, as part of the Right to Censor, is defending. Lita throws her down to start and the beatdown is on in a hurry. They get sloppy early on with Ivory shoving her away as Lawler talks about Lita’s underwear. Lita gets choked down in the corner as her eye is busted open BAD. More right hands keep Lita in trouble until she snaps off a headscissors for a breather.

Cue Steven Richards as Ivory is sent outside, meaning Lita gets to dive onto both of them. A high crossbody gets two on Ivory but Richards pulls her away from the Litasault. Somehow that isn’t a DQ, even with the referee looking right at her. The distraction lets Ivory grab the title but Lita suplexes her down. Now the Litasault hits the belt and Ivory retains at 4:56.

Rating: D+. They packed a lot into this one and that eye cut was nasty but it was a pretty weak effort, as was often the case around this era. The biggest problem is trying to put in so much stuff into a five minute match, as there is only so much you can cram into so little time before it stops working. That was the case here and it showed pretty badly.

Post match Lita is a bloody mess and has to be helped out.

Rock is pretty banged up.

Jericho jumps Kane in the back with a chair and drives him into a steel door. Various weapons are used until referees pull Jericho off.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker for the WWF Title. Angle has been the greatest rookie in company history and Undertaker won a four way match to become #1 contender. Undertaker doesn’t think much of a nitwit like Angle, who isn’t laying down for anyone.

Undertaker talks about debuting here ten years ago and tonight, Angle takes his Last Ride.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging. Before the match, Angle talks about how this is his anniversary so the fans can vote on their favorite rookie year moment. Angle even lists them off until Undertaker’s entrance cuts him off for a tried and true idea. With Angle bailing, Undertaker holds up the title to get in Kurt’s head in a hurry. Undertaker grabs a chair so Angle hides behind the referee like a great coward.

That’s fine with Undertaker, who throws the chair to Angle….who uses it before the bell to take over early on. Angle stomps him down in the corner but you don’t do that to Undertaker, who switches places with him and hammers away. The big leg gets two and an elbow is good for the same, though the second one sees Undertaker pull him up. Old School connects as the fans are happy, though I can’t get around Undertaker’s near camouflage pants.

Angle snaps off the first suplex and Undertaker rolls to the floor, only to catch a diving Angle and drive him into the post. Back in and the big boot misses in the corner, which tends to be the case more often than not. The leg gets bent around the ropes as Angle is a lot more comfortable with the slower pace. Undertaker pulls him down into the Fujiwara armbar but cue Edge and Christian to distract the referee as Angle taps.

The distractions allow Angle to get up and take him back down by the leg, meaning it’s time to lay down and crank a bit. That’s broken up as well so Undertaker goes outside and beats up the Canadians, followed by a chokeslam for two on Angle. The champ is right back up and goes after the knee again, which does at least take Undertaker down for a bit. Angle grabs the Figure Four but gets it turned over for the break.

Undertaker gets two off a powerslam but Angle takes the leg again and Figure Fours it around the post for a bit. The leg is fine enough for Snake Eyes to get two and they’re both down again. A quick low blow (with the referee looking at them) doesn’t have much effect as Undertaker tries the Tombstone with Angle getting out to the apron. Angle tries to crawl underneath the ring but gets pulled back out for the Last Ride. That’s good for two….because the referee is counting the wrong man. That would be Kurt’s brother Eric, allowing Kurt to run back in and roll Undertaker up with tights for the pin at 16:03.

Rating: D+. I really wasn’t feeling this one as the leg stuff kept going but Undertaker kept getting back up without selling the thing. The ending was creative enough (or at least fresh) and that’s better than the selection of stupid finishes they could have used. Just not the best chemistry here and Undertaker never felt like he was in danger of taking a regular fall, which took away any drama they could have had.

Post match Kurt jumps in his car and gets out.

Video on the XFL cheerleaders. Like that’ll have any shelf life.

Edge and Christian/Right To Censor vs. Dudley Boyz/Hardy Boyz

Survivor Series again and Goodfather/Bull Buchanan, with Val Venis, are Tag Team Champions. Buchanan and Bubba start things off with nothing of note happening so it’s off to Goodfather to shoulder D-Von down instead. Everything breaks down in a hurry and it’s a quadruple DDT to plant the villains. The Hardys pull off their shirts to reveal Dudley camouflage but it takes too long, allowing Edge to hit the Edge O Matic to get rid of Matt at 3:58.

D-Von clotheslines Edge and Christian down but a Buchanan distraction sets up the Unprettier to get rid of D-Von at 5:08. Bubba comes in for a heck of a backdrop on Christian and it’s Jeff coming in. That goes better for Christian, who whips him ribs first into the post. Buchanan comes in and gets to stomp away, only to miss a charge so Bubba cane come back in and clean house.

Edge spears Buchanan by mistake and Bubba pins Bull at 7:32. The Bubba Bomb hits Edge and Christian splashes him by mistake to give Bubba another pin at 8:00. So it’s Bubba/Jeff vs. Christian/Goodfather in a bizarre tag match. The Death Valley Driver lets Goodfather get rid of Bubba at 8:42. Jeff is back up and takes Christian down for the Swanton and the pin at 9:34. Goodfather misses a splash in the corner though and Venis clotheslines him by mistake, allowing Jeff to steal the final pin at 10:05.

Rating: D. Oh this didn’t work as it needed about twice as long. They were flying through everything at once and nothing had a chance to make any kind of an impact. Jeff didn’t feel like he won as much as he was the only one they didn’t have time to eliminate. These eight are capable of WAY better but there is only so much that you can do in ten minutes with seven eliminations.

Post match the Right To Censor comes in to destroy Jeff but the Dudleys come in for the save. RTC is put through some tables for the big moment. They really needed to do this here instead of giving the match the extra time? I do miss Bubba’s trance for putting people through tables though.

HHH tells the Radicalz that they know what to do.

We recap HHH vs. Steve Austin. Rikishi ran Austin over last year but Austin came back and beat Rikishi up. Since it was Rikishi vs. Steve Austin, it was clear that someone had to be Rikishi’s boss, which of course was revealed as HHH. JR being stunned that the top heel in the company being the top heel in the story isn’t his best moment. Now it’s about revenge.

Steve Austin vs. HHH

No DQ and the Radicalz are banned from ringside. Austin goes straight to the slugging (as you may have guessed) and sends HHH head first into the buckle. A knee to the ribs sets up more shots to the face before Austin starts going after HHH’s bad back. The Thesz press and middle finger elbow send HHH outside as there is no point in trying for a cover yet. They fight up to the entrance with Austin picking up a piece scaffolding but getting punched back down.

The fight goes backstage for a bit before coming back to the entrance where Austin gets in a suplex. Back to ringside with both guys going into the steps and Austin stomps away at the timekeeper’s area. There’s a monitor shot to the head, followed by Austin picking up the cooler….but thinking twice about it because that’s what Austin does. Austin stomps away to leave a bloody HHH laying, meaning it’s time for a beer.

The empty can goes upside HHH’s busted head and it’s time to go inside again for a lot of punching. HHH’s low blow slows things down a bit and a neckbreaker takes him down. HHH crushes Austin’s head against the post and gets two off a clothesline. Austin grabs a spinebuster but misses the middle rope elbow. It’s back to the floor and a Pedigree attempt on the steps is countered with a backdrop through the announcers’ table.

Back in and the Stunner connects…for no cover. Instead Austin grabs the chair because it’s time for revenge. Austin gets a pretty disturbing smile on his face as he wraps the chair around HHH’s ankle. Hang on as let’s make it the neck instead, only to have HHH roll to the floor. They fight backstage again and here are the Radicalz to jump Austin with Eddie escorting HHH away.

Agents and referees try to break it up so Austin gets up and chases Benoit outside. HHH is out there as well but we’ve lost Austin so HHH is hiding in a car. Benoit goes off to find Austin and it’s HHH doing a near voiceover, saying we need to finish this. Cue Austin in a forklift to pick HHH’s car up and drop it down (HHH: “HOLY S***!”) to end the show. We’ll say the match ended at about 25:00.

Rating: B+. They did exactly what they should have done here and didn’t try to do anything else. This was all about violence and Austin getting some aggression out because HHH tried to kill him. Austin even had the big moment near the end with the Pillmanizing of the neck. This went well and outside of the ending with the car, it was a heck of a brawl with HHH not getting squashed, as he shouldn’t have.

Overall Rating: D+. The main event helped a lot but this just wasn’t a very good show. It was all about the one big match, Undertaker vs. Angle with a screwy finish and then the just ok Rock vs. Rikishi match. Things were in a weird place here with Austin and Rock now fighting over the top spot and it is clear that Rock took a step down at least for tonight. Rikishi being in one of the bigger matches on a major show is hardly a believable spot and this show just does not hold up, outside of the main event.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Original: D+

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: C-

The Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C

2019 Redo: D+

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: C

William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

2012 Redo: D-

2019 Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Rikishi

Original: B

2012 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C

Ivory vs. Lita

Original: D+

2012 Redo: D

2019 Redo: D+

Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: D+

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Original: C-

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: D+

Steve Austin vs. HHH

Original: D-

2012 Redo: B-

2019 Redo: B+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

2012 Redo: C-

2019 Redo: D+

Dang I’m all over the place with this one but yeah it’s not a great show by any stretch.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/24/survivor-series-2000-i-never-remember-this-show/

And the 2012 Redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/07/survivor-series-count-up-2000-no-selling-a-car-crash/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2000 (2012 Redo): The Forgotten One

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2000
Date: November 19, 2000
Location: Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 18,602
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The other major story for this show is the Undertaker, who is now a biker instead of dead and possibly the devil himself. He returned in June and is already back in the title hunt with a shot against new champion Kurt Angle tonight. Angle shot up the card faster than almost anyone else in history, winning the belt less than a year after debuting. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about HHH of course. This is one of those instances where I’m fine with the focus not being on the title match. Angle vs. Undertaker is big but HHH vs. Austin is far more important.

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Molly, brand new and still quite cute here, is the third Holly cousin. T&A are Test and Albert, managed by Trish. This was during the time where T&A took over the APA’s offices and called themselves the T&APA. Blackman is Hardcore Champion. Albert and Blackman start things off and apparently Crash is here because the APA left him in charge of the office. He comes in and dives into a slam from Albert, only to be caught in a cross body.

Trish wants to beat up Crash but kicks Albert low instead. Off to Molly so Trish runs like a cowardly heel is supposed to. Test comes in so Molly bails. We’re doing a lot of running around here without anything of note happening. Crash hits a nice slingshot hurricanrana for two but gets his head kicked off by Test.

Test’s pumphandle slam doesn’t work and Crash kicks Test into Albert. Trish comes in and misses an elbow so it’s back to Molly. Albert pulls Molly’s hair from the apron but Trish can’t do anything with her yet. Blackman’s tag isn’t seen and T&A beats on Molly for a second before everything breaks down. A bulldog gets two for Trish but Molly finishes her with a top rope sunset flip.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t terrible or anything, but why wasn’t this a dark match? The story is barely there, the wrestling was just ok, and I don’t think this really fired up anyone for the show. I don’t get the thinking here but maybe they just wanted to get this out of the way before we got to everything else? That’s all I can think of. At least Trish and Molly looked good.

Molly is about to fall out of her top and Jerry loses it.

Christian is sick so Edge and Christian can’t help Angle in the World Title match. They’re on for beers after the show though.

Tiger Ali Singh and Low Down (Chaz (Mosh from the Headbangers)/D’Lo Brown) can’t get into the building. Singh was around for years and never went anywhere.

Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Chris Benoit, Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko, Eddie Guerrero

Road Dogg, Billy Gunn, K-Kwik, Chyna

The Radicalz are the people I was referring to when I said a lot of talent would be leaving WCW for the WWF. These four were the backbone of WCW and all left at once, arriving in the WWF in January as a unit. Once they left, you could see WCW’s days being numbered as they took a lot of good matches from WCW and sent them over to the WWF. Kwik is better known as R-Truth. Eddie is Intercontinental Champion and Dean is Light Heavyweight Champion. I would call this Team DX but they’re actually not together anymore.

Saturn and Gunn get things going here but it’s quickly off to Chyna for a double suplex. Chyna pounds away in the corner as we’re waiting on the Eddie vs. Chyna showdown. A powerslam gets two on Saturn and there’s the handspring elbow but Saturn catches her. Chyna comes back with a DDT to drop Saturn but everything breaks down. Eddie hits Chyna in the back with a title belt and Saturn gets the easy pin.

Dogg comes in next but gets suplexed almost immediately. Off to Eddie who pounds away and dropkicks Dogg’s knee out. Dean comes in but it’s quickly back to Eddie for a slingshot hilo onto the knee. Eddie goes up but runs his mouth too long, allowing Dogg to superplex him down. There’s the hot tag to Billy who immediately charges into a triple team in the Radicals’ corner. Smart guy that Billy. Billy fights them off and takes over on Eddie with a gorilla press and the One and Only (sleeper drop) for the pin and elimination.

Off to Dean vs. Kwik with the latter flipping out of a hip toss. Kwik tries a Downward Spiral but Dean falls backwards instead. Wow they screwed that one up. Benoit comes in but wants nothing to do with the hipping and the hopping so he Germans the tar out of Kwik for the pin to make it 3-2. Off to Saturn vs. Road Dogg with the former taking over. Dean suplexes Dogg down for two and it’s back to Saturn for a northern lights suplex to get us down to Saturn/Benoit/Malenko vs. Billy.

Billy gets to fight Dean first with the Radicals taking over quickly. Benoit low bridges Billy but Saturn accidentally superkicks Benoit on the floor. Back in the ring Dean ducks his head and the Fameasser makes it 2-1. A Jackhammer gets two on Saturn with Benoit making the save. Benoit hits the Swan Dive for two is shocked on the kickout. Chris is sent to the apron and Gunn tries to suplex him back in, only for the Warrior/Rude ending with Saturn tripping Billy and holding his foot for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but it never got to be anything interesting. Kwik’s original run with the company never worked and the whole tandem rapping thing with Road Dogg didn’t work at all. Gunn was into that awkward singles stage of his which never worked the way the company wanted it to. Not bad here but it was nothing better than fine.

Rock is here and doesn’t want to be interviewed by Lillian Garcia.

Jericho talks about a beast that is about to explode, meaning himself against Kane. Jericho spilled coffee on Kane and made burn remarks, setting up this feud. Unfortunately Jericho didn’t get the Sanka on a Pole match he mentions here.

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Big pop for Jericho. Jericho pounds away to start but the offense doesn’t have much effect. Kane slugs him down in the corner but Jericho keeps speeding things up. We head to the floor with Jericho diving mostly over the top to take Kane out. They head back to the apron and Jericho dropkicks Kane down to the floor. The steps get kicked into Kane’s face and the Canadian keeps control.

Jericho tries a top rope cross body but is easily caught and slammed down for two. He’s coming into this with a bad after Kane threw him through a window on Raw. Kane pounds him down in the corner but Jericho escapes a belly to back suplex with some right hands to the head. Jericho charges into a big boot and Kane hooks a freakish over the back choke, as in their backs are to each other with Kane pulling on Jericho’s chin while Jericho is in the air.

Kane pulls the buckle pad off but neither guy can get rammed into the exposed steel. Kane uppercuts Jericho down over and over but Jericho keeps popping back up. Back to the floor with Kane still in full control. Kane goes up but gets crotched to slow him down. Another attempt at the clothesline jumps into a dropkick to the ribs and things speed up a bit.

Jericho blocks a big boot and goes up top with a missile dropkick getting two. Chris’ flying forearm is caught but he slides down Kane’s back and rams him into the exposed buckle. There are the Walls on Kane for a good while but Kane finally crawls to the ropes. They get their legs intertwined and fall to the mat where Kane kicks Jericho off. In an embarrassing looking botch, Jericho hits the bulldog but Kane is too far away so the masked dude has to scoot over so it can hit. Not that it matters as he catches Jericho by the throat and chokeslams him for the pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me. The idea was supposed to be about Kane hating Jericho for insulting him, but instead this was just a wrestling match. On top of that it wasn’t a particularly good one with Jericho not really doing anything beyond his basic stuff. Their last man standing match at Armageddon was much better.

Terri tells the Radicals that HHH has a plan for later.

European Title: Hardcore Holly vs. William Regal

Regal is defending and he complains about American manners before the match. Holly pounds away to start and Regal is more than comfortable in a fist fight. Regal trips Holly up and sends him shoulder first into the post. The fans don’t seem to care about this and I can’t say I blame them. Regal works on the arm for awhile before waving to the fans. Off to a cross armbreaker for a bit before Holly is stomped to the floor. Regal works on the arm a bit more but gets caught by a crossbody for two. A low blow stops Holly and it’s back to the arm. Holly finally snaps and goes to the floor, grabs the belt and hits Regal for the DQ.

Rating: D-. LAME match here as it kept going forever (even though it didn’t even last six minutes) and no one cared. Then on top of that Holly just goes to the floor and gets the belt for a DQ? Why would he do something like that? My guess is his brain was melted by how boring this match was. I have no idea what they were thinking here.

Angle is warming up in the back when Trish comes up. Tonight is the start of Angle’s second year in the company and Trish points out that Stephanie isn’t here tonight, so maybe Kurt needs some “special” assistance. Angle appreciates it but doesn’t need Test and Albert. Kurt was so hilarious back then.

We recap Rock vs. Rikishi. Rikishi was revealed as the driver of the car that ran over Austin. When he was explaining what he did, he said that he did it for the Rock. Rock rose up the card during Austin’s absence because while Austin was there, the Samoans were being held down. Yes, they turned it into a race thing. Rikishi was in a car driven by HHH and drove at Rock, hitting him in the chest with a sledgehammer, leaving Rock in bad shape coming into tonight.

Rikishi vs. The Rock

Rock charges at the ring and it’s on quickly. Right hands knock Rikishi against the ropes and Rock hits a Samoan Drop. He grabs a chair but Tim White disarms him, allowing Rikishi to score with a superkick. A single stomp to Rock’s injured chest gives the fat man control. Rikishi hits a legdrop and Rock is already in trouble. Rock tries some right hands but Rikishi takes him right back down with a side slam for two.

Rock sends him to the floor and sends Rikishi’s head into the steps. Seriously, Rock, you’re half Samoan. You know better than that. Rikishi pops back up and drops Rock chest first onto the barricade to take over again. The referee gets run over and we head back into the ring. Rikishi pulls out a sledgehammer but walks into a Rock Bottom before he can swing it. The referee crawls back in for a delayed two.

Rikishi headbutts him in the chest to take over again. A Samoan Drop puts Rock down and Rikishi sits down on him for two. Rikishi rams into Rock in the corner and loads up a Stinkface for the humiliation part. Rock explodes out of the corner with a clothesline and both guys are down. A superkick misses and Rock spinebusters him down. The People’s Elbow gets…the pin? A single elbow apparently is enough to keep Rikishi down for about 40 seconds while Rock crawls over to him. That’s one heck of an elbow.

Rating: C+. This took a bit to get going but once they got to the big slugfest stuff it was a lot better. At the end of the day though, Rikishi just did not belong in this world and he never worked as a heel. He’s a fat guy in a thong and not a guy that people want to boo. Thankfully his main event run was only going to last until a bit after Armageddon and then it would be back to the midcard where he belonged.

Post match Rikishi destroys Rock and lays him out with a bunch of Banzai Drops to the bad chest.

HHH is with the Radicals when Foley comes in and bans the Radicals from ringside in the main event. HHH doesn’t care so Foley makes it No DQ as well. HHH still doesn’t care. Methinks evil is afoot.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Lita

Ivory is in the RTC (Right to Censor, a group parodying the Parents Television Council, who was going after the WWF at the time) and is defending here. Lita (former valet and now high flying wrestler) goes straight at her and the fight is on fast. A quick hiptoss puts Ivory down as does an enziguri. Ivory comes back with a clothesline as Jerry panics over seeing Lita’s thong. Ivory hits a right hand and HOLY SWEET GOODNESS Lita is busted open! I mean she is GUSHING. During the replay of it, Lita botches a hurricanrana and drives Ivory’s head into the mat. I’m not sure which of those hurt worse.

Steven Richards (RTC leader) comes out so Lita throws Ivory to the floor and hits a big dive to take both of them out. A cross body gets two for Lita but the moonsault misses thanks to Steven. Ivory misses a belt shot and gets suplexed down. Lita takes her own top off but the moonsault hits knees. Apparently Ivory pulled the belt up and knocked Lita silly to retain.

Rating: D. This was like any Raw match you would have ever seen. That’s the theme for this show so far: most of the matches are nothing special and could have been on most TV shows. Lita looked out of it in there, which says a lot for her as she got WAY better in a few years, as did Trish. Nothing to see here.

Coach (geeky interviewer) has no updates on Rock.

Jericho jumps Kane and beats him up, setting up their rematch.

We recap Angle vs. Undertaker. Angle won EVERYTHING his rookie year and Undertaker is Undertaker. That’s about the extent of the feud.

Undertaker says this is his show and he’ll win the title.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending. Before the match, Angle asks us for a moment of silence to reflect on our favorite Angle moment of the last year. We get some Florida can’t vote right jokes before Angle lists off his accomplishments in the last year. Undertaker cuts him off before Kurt gets to the Eurocontinental Title. This is the match where Undertaker is wearing the stupid looking light camouflage pants.

Angle stalls on the floor to start and won’t get in the ring to fight. Undertaker goes out and gets a chair as Angle is in the ring. The champ hides behind the referee and Undertaker throws the chair over to Kurt to even the odds. As Undertaker is removing his coat, Angle blasts him with the chair and the bell finally rings. Undertaker pounds away in the corner to start but apparently punches himself out, allowing Kurt to hammer away in the corner. A legdrop gets two on the champ as Undertaker pulls him up.

Old School (I know it’s called that because Undertaker shouts OLD SCHOOL before going up) connects but Undertaker would rather walk around than cover. Angle bails to the floor before the chokeslam can hit and things slow down again. This is Angle’s game at the point: hang in there long enough until he can find an opening and attack. Back in and Angle snaps off a suplex to take over and send Undertaker to the floor. Now Angle is telling him to get in the ring and fight. Nice touch.

Kurt dives off the apron but gets caught with ease (Kurt: “OH GOD NO!”) and rammed into the post. Undertaker does it again because he can and Angle is in trouble. Back in and Undertaker stays on Kurt’s weakened back but Angle gets in some shots to the leg to take over. The leg gets wrapped around the middle rope but Undertaker comes back with a Fujiwara Armbar. Here are Edge and Christian for a distraction a second before Angle taps out. Like every other schmuck face, Undertaker lets go of the hold when he has Angle dead to rites.

Angle picks the leg and takes Undertaker down again before hooking a leg lock. This goes on for a bit because the fact that Undertaker hasn’t tapped out in ten years has never taught a heel that his hold is no better than anyone elses who has failed in the past. Undertaker escapes and bails to the floor to beat up the Canadians who are finally ejected. Back in and there’s the chokeslam as Undertaker’s leg is fine. Edge and Christian (so much for the ejection) have the referee again so the chokeslam only gets two.

A quick rollup with tights gets two for Kurt and a Russian legsweep gets the same for Undertaker. After a quick breather for Angle on the floor, he comes back in for a bad Figure Four on the challenger. Undertaker reverses and Angle gets the rope as is the custom for this sequence. A powerslam gets two on Angle but Kurt goes right back to the leg. Kurt throws the Figure Four on around the post but gets kicked away.

Back in and Undertaker is right back up to his feet because he doesn’t feel like selling tonight. There’s only so much Angle can do when all the work he does on the leg doesn’t mean anything because Undertaker won’t even limp. Angle hits Undertaker low and like an idiot tries a Tombstone. The counter is academic and Undertaker plants Kurt who rolls out to the floor.

Kurt dives under the ring but Undertaker pulls him back out. Back in and Undertaker hits the Last Ride….but the referee won’t count the three. Why not? Because that’s not Kurt Angle. That’s ERIC Angle, Kurt’s nearly identical brother in identical tights. Kurt comes in and rolls Undertaker up with a handful of tights for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. That’s actually a brilliant ending and it keeps both guys looking strong at the same time. They used the same thing with Brock Lesnar vs. Angle in 2003 and it still worked there too. As for the match, most of the praise for it should go to Kurt and most of the blame should go to Undertaker.

Angle could wrestle the match of his life, but if Undertaker won’t sell the knee injury, it doesn’t make a bit of difference. That can’t be blamed on Kurt though, and the match wasn’t terrible as it was. These two would have MUCH better matches down the line too. In a bit of trivia, this was the first time in seven years that the title hasn’t changed hands at this show.

After some replays, Kurt runs from the arena to a waiting car to escape.

The XFL cheerleaders are here.

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Dudley Boys, Hardy Boys

Edge and Christian, Bull Buchanan, Goodfather

Buchanan (a mostly generic power guy who could fly around a bit) and Goodfather (Godfather of course) are the RTC and they’re actually Tag Team Champions here instead of one of the other three teams. Bubba and Bull start things off but the crowd is kind of dead so far. Bubba elbows him down for two and it’s off to D-Von. A big boot puts D-Von down and it’s off to Goodfather for another boot to the head but no cover. Off to Christian who pounds away at D-Von but walks into a reverse inverted DDT. This match isn’t exactly taking off.

Matt comes in to clean house as everything breaks down. The Hardys take off their shirts to reveal camoflauge shirts to match the Dudleys. In the melee, the Edge-O-Matic (a reverse X Factor) pins Matt. D-Von vs. Edge now with the former hitting a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. D-Von takes down both Canadians with a double clothesline but a Buchanan distraction lets Christian hit the Killswitch for the elimination to make it 4-2.

Bubba comes in and throws Christian around a bit before it’s off to Jeff. The fans want tables but they get Jeff sent to the floor and a tag to Buchanan. Back to Bubba who runs over the Bull a few times and beats up Goodfather a bit too. The Canadians get backdropped a few times before Edge accidentally spears Buchanan down, giving Bubba an easy pin. Christian accidentally splashes Edge giving Bubba another easy pin. It’s Jeff/Bubba vs. Christian/Goodfather.

They botch something but Goodfather hooks a Death Valley Driver for the pin on Bubba. Jeff gets to start with Christian but knocks Goodfather off the apron first. Christian misses a charge and hits post. The Swanton eliminates Christian and about twenty seconds later Val Venis (also RTC) clotheslines Goodfather by mistake, giving Jeff the winning pin.

Rating: C-. Much like the rest of the show, this wasn’t bad but it was nothing interesting for the most part. The tag division would get going again soon with TLC II which was somehow even better than the first edition. Having Jeff win here is fine but without Matt at this point, the fans didn’t really care. Granted that could be said about the rest of the show too. Again, another acceptable match but nothing I’ll remember in an hour.

Jeff gets beaten up but the Dudleys and Matt make the save and put the RTC through tables.

Austin is walking.

HHH tells the Radicals they know what to do.

We recap Austin vs. HHH. You know the story by this point: Rikishi had a boss and it was revealed to be HHH. HHH explained that he did it because while Austin was gone, HHH rose to the top of the company and even took over everything. Tonight is the big fight between the two of them and it’s No DQ.

Steve Austin vs. HHH

No DQ remember. After a little staredown, Austin goes right at HHH and beats him around the ring. The initial beatdown goes on for a few minutes with Austin focusing on the back in a bit of a strange choice. HHH comes back with a facebuster but Austin immediately hits the Thesz Press to take him right back down.

They head to the floor with Austin still in full control. Austin picks up a big piece of metal but HHH knocks it away. They fight over to the production area and then to the back and then back to the arena in a few seconds. Back in the aisle, HHH counters a suplex into one of his own to put Austin in even more trouble. They fight back to ringside and Austin is thrown onto the announce table before fighting back, sending HHH into the steps.

After destroying the timekeeper’s area, Austin blasts HHH with a monitor to bust him open. The beer cooler is thrown around, leaving a huge puddle on the floor. Austin has a seat on the steps and has a beer because he’s thirsty. HHH gets thrown into the ring but Austin stops to yell at JR, allowing HHH to get in some shots. A Stunner is countered into a neckbreaker and both guys are down.

HHH sends Austin into the post and bends him around said post, now working on the back as well. A brief Austin comeback is stopped dead by another neckbreaker. HHH’s psychology is working well here. Austin comes back with that whip spinebuster but the middle finger elbow misses. They head back outside with both guys getting whipped into the barricade. HHH gets the advantage and loads up a Pedigree on the steps but gets backdropped through the announce table in a cool spot.

They head back inside and HHH bails to the corner. Apparently all the years of mudhole stompings haven’t clicked in yet. There’s the Stunner but Austin stops before covering. Instead Austin gets a chair and sets to Pillmanize (wrap a chair around a body part and stomp on it) the ankle. He thinks twice of that and wraps the chair around HHH’s neck instead. HHH rolls to the floor and they fight up the aisle again.

This time they head to the production area and then through a curtain and into the back, the same place they went for a few seconds earlier. HHH rams Austin into an anvil case but Austin sends him into a soda machine. Here are the Radicalz to attack Austin and give HHH a breather.

After referees pull back the Radicalz, Austin chases HHH into the parking lot where HHH gets into a car. All of a sudden HHH is on a mic in a stupid moment but you have to go with it. Austin is nowhere to be seen until he drives in on a forklift, to lift up the car with HHH inside. HHH screams for mercy and is dropped down, destroying the car to end the show.

Rating: B-. This was ok but it never got to the point they were reaching for. The problem here is the same as it was in 1996 for Austin: everyone remembers the rematch far better because it’s probably better. This wasn’t that great, but it was ok and a good first brawl between the two. It’s not PPV main event good, but for a big brawl it was acceptable.

Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. The problem with this show is that while nothing on it was bad, nothing on it was good either. Nothing on this show is something that I will ever want to watch again because nothing on it is anything above ok. If you have to see every show in the series you won’t hate it, but there’s no reason to watch this other than for the sake of completeness.

Ratings Comparison

Steve Blackman/Crash Holly/Molly Holly vs. T&A/Trish Stratus

Original: D+

Redo: C-

The Radicalz vs. Team Chyna

Original: B-

Redo: C

Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B-

Redo: C-

William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

Original: D-

Redo: D-

The Rock vs. Rikishi

Original: B

Redo: C+

Ivory vs. Lita

Original: D+

Redo: D

Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Team Dudley Boys vs. Team Edge and Christian

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Steve Austin vs. HHH

Original: D-

Redo: B-

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: C-

That main event is the big surprise as I HATED it the first time but I thought it was pretty good here. Odd indeed.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/07/24/survivor-series-2000-i-never-remember-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Survivor Series Count-Up – 2000 (Original) Revenge

IMG Credit: WWE

Survivor Series 2000
Date: November 19, 2000
Location: Ice Palace, Tampa, Florida
Attendance: 18,602
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s a most interesting time for professional wrestling as WCW is on the absolute brink of going out of business and ECW was either off TV or almost off TV. The WWF had won the war and they knew it. Austin is back, having returned about a month or two ago to go after the driver from last year, who I’ve already explained to be Rikishi. Kish has also revealed that he was working for HHH the whole time, leading to the main event of Austin vs. HHH tonight.

Also we have Kurt Angle, who won the world title the previous month, defending against the Undertaker who is the American at this point. Other than that, there’s not a lot here. The Radicalz are here, which more or less completes the roster up until the Invasion of the following summer. With that being said, let’s get to it.

The opening video is a cool looking one of HHH saying how he controls everything and how tonight it’s Game Over for Austin. This doesn’t sound like much but it was really cool.

I miss WWF New York. That has to be one of the coolest ideas of all time.

Trish Stratus/T&A vs. Steve Blackman/Crash/Molly Holly

Whoever can find the point to this match first gets a present. T&A had taken over the APA’s office and turned it into T&APA. Yeah it’s dumber than it sounds. This was mainly to get Trish on TV I suppose, but the problem was that she just flat out sucked at this point. I know she became the best in the company eventually, but at this point she was just terrible.

As Lawler stares at her (with good reason), Ross points out a cool stat: the last six Survivor Series have had the WWF Title change hands. That’s not something I would have picked up on and it’s what commentators are supposed to do: throw out something that we wouldn’t catch. For some reason, Crash is WAY over. Molly is a newcomer at this point, and she is completely underrated as far as looks go. She really was very attractive.

Blackman is still desperately in search for a personality. I never realized how long he was in the company for. He’s the Hardcore champion here, because that’s what he did. Blackman and Albert start as Ross mentions that Crash was left in charge of the APA, because that makes sense in some weird logic. Trish, more or less in a one piece swimsuit, kicks Albert low. T&A is Test and Albert in case you didn’t know.

Crash allegedly looks like Elroy Jetson. I’ve never seen it. He does hit a cool move where he flips over the top rope head first and catches Test in a hurricanrana. Teddy Long is the referee which amuses me to no end. We’re about a year away from the brand split, where Long would find a completely new career. Test takes Crash’s head off with a boot. That was awesome. There’s this weird smoke going through the arena. It looks really odd.

We get Molly vs. Trish, leading to Molly carrying her through this as she should. Trish hits her bulldog from the middle rope that gets two. Almost immediately after that though, Molly hits a sunset flip from the middle rope for the pin. She almost came out of her top here, which isn’t a bad thing.

Rating: D+. Uh, yeah. Can someone tell me why this was on Pay Per View, or better yet why it opened the show? The women were hot, and that’s about it. Oh and that Crash rana was cool. Other than that, this was a waste of 5 minutes. At least they kept it short.

Edge and Christian won’t help Kurt against Taker, due to Christian eating some bad chili and having mono. It sounds dumb but odd comedy was what they were best at so this was fine. Angle says he’s not worried.

Tiger Ali Singh (picture Daivari mixed with the Million Dollar Man) and Low Down (Mosh and D’Lo Brown) can’t get into the arena. That’s somewhat amusing.

Radicalz vs. K-Kwik/Road Dogg/Chyna/Billy Gunn

Kwik is more commonly known as R-Truth. He and Dogg are doing a rap gimmick that wasn’t half bad actually. This is likely because it got Dogg doing ANYTHING else. Since that was likely the point of the character change, he was put into a team here with his old friends Chyna and Billy, because that’s not a DX reunion at all is it? The Radicalz had shown up in January and had been around the midcard ever since, which was fine I guess as they had no resumes to speak of in this company.

Chyna’s Playboy would be coming out soon after this, causing me to be very happy as I had a big thing for her. Chyna had been with Eddie over the Summer but at this point they were estranged due to him screwing two hos, one of which being known as Victoria. Billy is now known as The One. Yeah it’s worse than it sounds. At the moment Malenko is the Light Heavyweight Champion and Guerrero is the Intercontinental Champion and Terri is Saturn’s manager.

Billy and Saturn start off here which makes my head hurt. Why start with the least talented guys on each team? Chyna comes in soon and my heart goes all aflutter. She beats the living tar out of Saturn, which is pretty impressive. After a DDT (is there anything not perfect about this woman?), we get a big brawl and Eddie nails Chyna with the IC belt, allowing Saturn to pin her. Well that kinds of sucks. Now it’s Road Dogg vs. Saturn.

The Radicalz were an interesting team. When they were awesome they were very awesome but when they sucked they REALLY sucked. The Radicalz beat down the Dogg with relative ease, which makes sense. Eddie and Malenko come in for awhile to beat on him which is at least watchable. Lawler makes a great and true point when he says Dean doesn’t get the credit that he deserves.

Eddie takes too long on the top rope and Dogg makes his bad comeback. Ross says that there’s always something to remember in November. There has to be a bad lawsuit for ECW in there somewhere. Billy comes in and gets beaten down by the Radicalz as well, so at least some things never change. However, since he’s likely filled with cocaine, Billy pops up and beats on Eddie before using a sleeper drop to pin him. It’s not a great move but at least I see what they’re going for with it.

Kwik comes in and everything goes fast all of a sudden, but it ends just as fast due to a great Benoit German suplex to make it 3-2. What a shock: the Outlaws are the last two against the other team. I never once would have seen that coming. There’s a lot of brawling in the corner here, which isn’t really a good thing with this much of it. Despite being on the same team, the former Outlaws have gone their separate ways. Only in JR’s mind does that even begin to make sense.

A decent Northern Lights suplex takes out Roadie making it 3-1. This part is rather academic as they just beat on him over and over again. Eventually they hit the floor and Saturn messes up by superkicking Benoit square in the shoulder, which of course knocks him out. Billy gets in and hits a Fameasser on Malenko to make it 2-1.

Why does Billy against Benoit just sound like it’s a bad sign for the American? Billy actually kicks out of the headbutt which is kind of impressive. He goes for a suplex over the top but just like Warrior vs. Rude in 1989, Saturn hooks his foot to play the part of Heenan for the pin.

Rating; B-. Eh, it’s not terrible I guess. Actually at times it was even pretty good. There’s a lot of fast paced stuff in here which makes things go a lot better. Billy was the kind of guy that they tried so hard to push so many times and it just kept failing time after time. It’s not awful, but it could have been a bit better. I’m just not sure how.

Rock is just getting here and ignores Lillian’s questions.

Jericho says he was ready for a sanka on a poll match, but instead it’s just a regular match which is fine with him. He’s fighting Kane tonight in a feud that started over Jericho spilling coffee on Kane and then making bad jokes about Kane being burned, leading to this match.

As I’m watching this video where Jericho is still in the midcard and not a big deal yet at all, great talker, but he doesn’t have the resume yet. That’s a great sign for Miz. Anyway, Kane has spent about a month beating on Jericho, so there we are.

Chris Jericho vs. Kane

The pop is just ridiculous for Jericho. But hey he wasn’t important so he couldn’t get a serious push for over a year right? He’s in way over his head here as Kane is still a monster and Jericho is at the point where he’s too big for the IC Title for the most part but he’s not ready for the main event yet.

Jericho pounds away which gets him nowhere. It’s so odd seeing him being all aggressive etc compared to what he usually does anymore. Jericho uses basic speed to get Kane to the floor but goes for a dive over the top but hooks his foot on the top rope and faceplants badly. Basically this is a lot of hitting and running by the blonde until he gets caught in a powerslam off a cross body.

The idea here is that Kane doesn’t like Jericho because he’s handsome and Kane is all disfigured. It’s so weird to think that this is in the same year as Wrestlemania 2000. I’m not sure why but that blows my mind. Kane hooks Jericho in a Hangman which the idea is that Jericho and Kane are back to back and Kane reaches over his head, grabs Jericho under the chin and lifts him onto his back. It looks insane.

Kane gets the turnbuckle pad off but can’t ram Jericho in. Jericho blocks the clothesline with a dropkick which for once is realistic looking with Kane having a reason to come off the top in that position. He sits up anyway and we’re right back to even. Kane goes for a Snake Eyes on the exposed buckle but gets rammed into it instead.

Jericho hooks the Walls and Kane is in trouble. After being in them for about a minute he finally gets the rope. They scare the heck out of me with one thing they do but Kane saves it. Jericho sets for the Lionsault and Kane literally has to scoot over three feet so it’ll hit. THANKFULLY he grabs the choke as Jericho lands so that’s all fine. Chokeslam ends it.

Rating: B-. It’s what you would expect from these guys but minus just a bit. The problem here is that Jericho just isn’t ready to fight a guy the size of Kane. Jericho’s big push would come soon, but he just wasn’t ready here. He made it look good though, which is the point in fighting big monsters that are higher up on the food chain than you, so I can hardly complain I guess.

Terri tells the Radicals that HHH is here. Something is funny apparently.

European Title: William Regal vs. Hardcore Holly

This is happening because of some argument they had or other. They more or less say we just threw this together. He makes fun of the country for not being able to elect a new President, which is exactly true. He does more insults about basic things, which isn’t really that impressive. Holly has just come back from having his arm broken by a botched Angle moonsault, which was barely touched on in I think a run in and a bad match on TV.

Since he’s intelligent, Regal goes after the arm that was injured. So we’re about three minutes into this and it’s been literally ALL Regal. What’s the point of this match again? Oh yeah we need to fill in time. Holly starts his comeback, but after three punches and a crossbody, Regal is back on offense again.

Oh wait he got a fourth punch! He gets three more and two clotheslines before they go to the floor. Holly has finally taken control, so he goes and gets the belt and blasts Regal with it for the DQ. Mounted punching follows. Well thank you for that.

Rating: D-. This was just stupid. Why was this on PPV anyway? It was about 6 minutes long and was about 95% Regal, before a stupid DQ. This looked like the start of an angle rather than a PPV match, but of course nothing ever came of it. I don’t get this one.

Trish hits on Angle. He doesn’t get it.

We get a recap of Rock vs. Rikishi. The fat man claims that Rock asked him to take out Austin, which turns out to be a lie. Rock says he wants nothing to do with Rikishi, other than having this match of course and making a PPV paycheck from it. Anyway, Rikishi is in a Lincoln, the same kind of car that ran over Austin and slams Rock’s chest with a sledgehammer. The car was driven by HHH which reveals him to be the accomplice and mastermind behind the whole thing. That leads us here.

Rikishi vs. The Rock

Ok number one way to get Rikishi over as a heel, change his freaking ring attire. The thong thing just looks ridiculous. Rock sprints to the ring and beats the tar out of him. He even gets a decent Samoan Drop on him. I’ve never seen him punch that fast. Anyway, Rock goes for a chair but it doesn’t work as the referee grabs it and Rock takes a superkick to the chest, which makes more sense than the jaw in this case. The psychology is here if nothing else.

A lot of guys would have completely ignored the chest thing and just done generic offense, but if nothing else Rikishi is working on the chest almost entirely. He punches it in three out of the four corners because for some reason Rock’s reaction to pain is so stumble to the right every time. The story of the match is basically this: Rikishi hits Rock in the chest a bunch, Rock holds his chest, Rock fights back, repeat. Rock continues to act as a bra by holding his chest as they go to the floor.

The referee goes down on the floor because there hasn’t been enough ridiculous brawling so far of course. The fat guy becomes HHH as he pulls out a sledgehammer. I love Rock’s ridiculous overselling. He hits the Rock Bottom but there’s no referee, which doesn’t matter because Rock can’t cover. Back on their feet, Rikishi keeps stopping the comebacks with the racially charged heabutts, because all Samoans have hard heads right?

The deadly fat man drop looks like it has finished the Rock and is going to allow the evil of thongs to reign supreme forever, but it only gets two. Rikishi hits the Stinkface, which has got to be the most ridiculous move of all time. I hate moves…no wait it’s not a move. I hate things like that where it’s supposed to be psychologically devastating. Rock comes back with a big clothesline and Rikishi does a big flip that he tended to do.

The elbow hits and after a long wait before covering and barely a cover, that’s it? Oh come on now. Post match, Rikishi gets up because he got hit by A FREAKING ELBOW DROP. I love the way Rock is holding his chest as it looks like he’s covering his nipples. Four Banzai Drops later, Rock is hurt apparently.

I love when announcers say people will never be the same. Of course they won’t be. They’re going to age, they’re going to have worked out more, they’re going to be more experienced etc. You’re never the same as you were before people.

Rating: B. This was actually good. Having Rock injured coming into it was required because it made it seem like he was in danger of losing. I also like how he won the battle but ultimately lost the war, as it makes Rikishi look like a bigger deal without weakening Rock. It’s not great, but it certainly carries itself well if that makes sense.

Raven is at WWF New York. Dang they screwed up that character.

Over an hour into the show and Austin is just getting here. That’s just great.

HHH is with the Radicalz and Foley, with a creepy looking short haircut, comes in and says the Radicalz can’t be in the match tonight. Also it’s no DQ, which makes it stupid because if it’s no DQ, what can Foley do if the Radicalz interfere?

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Lita

Ivory is in the Right To Censor at this point. She doesn’t like Lita because of the clothes. Due to that, Lita gets a title shot? What sense does that make? Lita of course looks great. I think they botch a spot as Lita ducks underneath about four moves off the ropes. I think they got that backwards somewhere. Ross says they’re live in Rwanda as well which is odd. Lita is busted open and I’d say it’s legit too.

There’s no reason she would have bladed this early or at all for that matter. Ivory is actually wearing a long skirt in this. Lawler implies that Ivory is bad in bed. Oddly enough she was brought in as a sex toy for Mark Henry. Lita hits some decent stuff but her eye is bothering her. She takes out Ivory and Stevie with a sweet plancha though. Ivory is pulled out of the way of the moonsault by Steven to get Ivory back on the offense.

This is a very fast moving match. I don’t mean in the sense of high flying, but it’s just going really quickly, which isn’t good. Ivory misses a shot with the belt and Lita takes her down and takes her top off, which I’m hardly complaining about. The moonsault doesn’t work again as Ivory as the belt ready, and she get the pin.

I’ve checked this more than once and I can’t actually see where Ivory covers her. Maybe I’m just missing it but I don’t see it at all. Ok the replay shows the arm over Lita so that works. For some reason Lita “never quitting” is impressive? OH DANG she’s bleeding badly. I didn’t realize it was that much.

Rating: D+. This is passing because of Lita’s looks. There’s just nothing at all of note here as it’s WAY too short and Lita looked bad in it. It might be because of the blood, but dang man. There’s just nothing appealing about this match at all other than looks, so yeah it’s pretty bad. Ivory would go on to feud with Chyna who would destroy her at Mania for the belt before killing its credibility by just leaving while still champion.

Coach says Rock is hurt.

Jericho beats up Kane despite having lost clean to him earlier.

We get a recap of the build to Taker vs. Angle. Angle has done more in a year than a lot of people do in a career, and Taker is Taker. That sums up just about everything. Taker says Angle will take his last ride.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Undertaker

Remember this is still good boy Kurt, not crazy psycho Kurt. Taker has been here for ten years, so he’s still a veteran, but not the long term veteran like he is now. That’s just amazing on a lot of levels. Angle asks for a moment of reflection on your favorite Kurt Angle moment from the past year. He would conduct a poll, but Florida would screw it up. He lists off his accomplishments and the way he does this is just hilarious. He had this character down from the day he debuted.

Naturally Taker cuts him off with a bad Kid Rock song. That man is the evil of wrestling, plain and simple. Taker’s pants are just a shade under white. That’s just making it difficult to take him seriously as a tough guy. Angle stalls the start of the match so Taker gets fed up with it and gets a chair which he throws to Angle. That’s kind of cool actually. Angle nails him with it and we finally get a bell. After Angle punches him a bit, Taker channels his inner Hulk Hogan by hitting a boot and legdrop.

Since he surely would have had the pin because that’s just the most awesome combination of moves in history, he pulls him up because he doesn’t want a minute long match. I think Taker is going for Old School. I base this on the theory that Taker shouts out OLD SCHOOL! I just can’t get over those pants. They’re like beige or something like that. This turns into a fistfight and I’ll give you three guesses as to who wins that. Both guys have scary strength.

Angle gets a belly to back suplex with ease and Taker catches Angle jumping at him from the apron without backing up a step. That’s just scary power. Angle starts working on the leg for the ankle lock. That makes sense. Taker works on the back which makes sense I guess, but the Last Ride isn’t exactly a move that needs a lot of buildup when you think about it.

I love the basic story here of Angle tries to use all these suplexes and psychology of the legs etc. and Taker just punches the tar out of him. Just as I say this, Taker hits an armbar. Edge and Christian run out and distract the referee while Angle is tapping.

Chokeslam doesn’t hit, because since Taker is a face that has a submission, he lets it go instead of just cranking on it until the referee is paying attention. I’ll never get the thought processes of wrestlers. Taker beats up Edge and Christian so at least some things never change. That’s good to know.

Angle takes a chokeslam which prompts Ross to shout about how it’s over, so naturally it’s not. The Olympian gets a bad figure four, but for the first time ever more than likely it’s on the proper leg. Flair is the master of the move, but he tends to put it on the wrong leg. Angle doesn’t have it on right but I guess that’s the tradeoff that’s made. Taker reverses it and Lawler assures us that Angle is NOT crying from the pain.

Taker is barely selling the leg, which bothers me. Is he Shawn Michaels or something? Since it’s Survivor Series, Angle puts the figure four on the pole. We have to have Bret Hart references left and right so why not? Taker STILL doesn’t sell the knee. Despite having his leg worked on for about ten minutes, Taker has the strength to pick up Angle for the Tombstone and walk around with him as Angle tries to fight it off. Are you kidding me?

I would understand this to an extent if it was Deadman Taker, but this is ridiculous. We go to the floor again and Angle hides under the ring. Taker pulls him out, takes him into the ring and hits the Last Ride for the pin? What the heck was that? It was nothing actually, because we only have two. The referee sees Angle’s face and realizes it’s a different person (Kurt’s brother Eric, also a pro wrestler but not a very good one at all.

They did the EXACT same storyline in 2003 with Lesnar instead of Taker.). The real Kurt comes in and rolls up Taker for the pin. Well that was different and at least it wasn’t a Montreal reference. We see Kurt running to a car that’s waiting for him unlocked and with the keys in the ignition in the parking lot where he speeds off.

Dang you would think that the defending world champion would have a better car waiting for him. That thing has to be at least four or five years old and it’s not even a pretty color.

Rating: B-. Well, I hate the ending, and I really hate Taker’s refusal to sell the knee, but this was good other than that. It worked fine for what it was, but Angle just wasn’t ready to hang with Taker yet. If you want the real main event level match from these two, check out No Way Out 2006. Now THAT is how it’s done. As for this, it’s good but not a classic. I liked it for the psychology, but some may not.

The XFL is coming. Let the jokes begin.

Edge/Christian/Right To Censor vs. Dudleys/Hardys

The RTC here is Buchanan and Goodfather and somehow they’re the tag champions here. That would last almost another month, which blows my mind. Ross points out how just about everyone has switched sides since last year which is amusing to me as it’s quite true that everyone can change from face to heel in such a relatively short amount of time. We start with Bubba and Buchanan if that tells you where this match is going.

D-Von makes things better with a jumping reverse elbow, which is one of the coolest moves of all time. This is broing for about a minute and a half or so until we get the big brawl that we knew was coming. Jeff is of course rocking a way too big purple sweatshirt and we get a quadruple DDT, which is somehow dumber than it sounds. Why is it dumb you ask? Are you telling me that in that whole time they were setting for it, no one that was getting dropped could throw a punch to the ribs to break it up?

That’s why it’s stupid. The Hardy’s shirts come off to reveal…more shirts. Well that was pointless. Oh ok they match the shirts the Dudleyz are wearing. That makes a bit of sense then. Immediately after that, Matt rips his off. Thanks for wasting our time. Jeff does the same, so our time is doubly wasted. T

hankfully just after that, Edge takes out Matt with the Edge-O-Matic, which is just an awesome name for a move, period. About a minute later after nothing of all of interest or importance, Christian hits the Unprettier on D-Von to make it 4-2.

This just isn’t that interesting. WWE needs to learn that just because a tag team is good together they’re not that interesting apart most of the time. Take the Dudleys for example. Does anyone care about either of them on their own? That might be a bad example as most people don’t care about them as a team anymore, but to be fair again they haven’t really been the Dudleys or anything close to them in about ten years now so whatever.

Bubba comes in and cleans house. Edge accidentally spears Buchanan and Bubba eliminates him. About thirty seconds later Bubba hits the full nelson bomb on Edge. Christian goes for a splash from the top rope for the save but misses and Edge is gone just after that. That leaves Christian and the Goodfather vs. Jeff and Bubba. Goodfather takes Bubba out with a really bad Death Valley Driver, which gets the very original name Goodfather Driver.

Christian hits the post and then in a very weird looking move, Jeff picks up Christian for a slam and literally just drops him. It looked odd to say the least. A very high and fast Swanton ends Christian and we’re at one on one. Hmm, a young and popular guy against a generic midcarder that found one gimmick that worked out of about 5 he was given. I’ll set the over/under at a minute. Who wants some?

After a misses splash with theatrics that certainly isn’t the Ho Train, Val Venis misses a clothesline that hits Goodfather for the pin. Well that was such a phenomenal ending that I don’t think there’s anything left for me to say about this match. The Right to Censor all beat on Jeff until Matt and the Dudleys come in for the save. You can figure out what happens by yourselves here.

Rating: C-. This started well, but it felt like it was clipped at the end. I mean there’s zero story or anything like that to get rid of the last about 5 guys in this. It’s just finishing move, thirty seconds of whatever, finishing move, repeat. I know they didn’t have a lot of time, but they could have done more than this.

Also, how in the world are the Dudleys in a match and they don’t get to do the freaking 3D? They’re known for three things: the 3D, tables, and the 3D through tables, and they don’t get to do it? Come on now. This could have been cut from the show or turned into a quick tag title match instead and it would have been much better.

HHH talks to the Radicalz about nothing at all.

We recap Austin vs. HHH, which really was a huge feud. Once Austin got back, the manhunt was on for the guy that Rikishi was working with. How they knew he had an accomplice was never flat out explained, but whatever. I guess it might be that Rikishi was just too freaking stupid to be able to pull this off himself but that’s neither here nor there. There were more attempts on Austin, such as dropping an anvil case being dropped near him and a guy hitting him in the head with a wrench.

HHH had apparently been a bit of a face around this time, but turned on Austin on Raw, revealing himself. JR was stunned by this for some reason. He wants to know why HHH would do this. In the words of Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer: “When are you going to get this through your pretty little head? I’M EVIL!”

Why can’t Ross get that? HHH did it because he’s a FREAKING HEEL. It’s his nature to do stuff like this. Anyway, HHH’s reasoning makes a lot of sense as he says that in Austin’s absence he took over the company and became the top guy, which is true.

HHH vs. Steve Austin

HHH gets booed out of the building and Austin gets the roof blown off the freaking place. The buildup for this was perfect, as the fans hated HHH for taking their hero from them for nearly a full year. That’s the best way to get heat, and HHH was somewhere in the range of the devil himself. He’s using the Disturbed theme music here which is good also. Two middle fingers go up and we’re on. As happened with a match yesterday, there’s just nothing to say here.

The problem with this match is simple: HHH has tried to murder Austin twice now, and they’re going to have a wrestling match over it. See how there’s just something missing there? This is just a big brawl. Now who saw that one coming? If you did, give yourself five points. Anyway, this is just ok at best. It’s just a fight all over the arena with HHH working on Austin’s neck and Austin working on HHH”s back and both guys punching and kicking each other a lot.

This is a match that would have benefited greatly from a gimmick not known as No DQ. This needed to be the Cell or Last Man Standing or something where you could have had a lot of violence that made sense. This is just mindless fighting with no direction at all.

Now before someone says to me “but KB it’s a fight. It’s supposed to not have direction”, I’d advise you to shut your idiotic mouth because you don’t know what you’re talking about. Take a look at something like Summerslam 2002 with Shawn and HHH and then take a look at a run of the mill hardcore match from say 2000. You can clearly see the difference. Now, yes the talent of the wrestlers makes a big difference, but that’s the point isn’t it?

Most of the time, the match should be about the wrestlers in the match, not the weapons or gimmick that’s going on. The wrestlers carry the match and not their surroundings and these two certainly are capable of doing just that. However, we just get a No DQ match, which means it’s more or less a failure. The heat is there, but it’s too long and too generic. This should have been about 10-12 minutes long and have been Austin being as violent as possible.

That’s where a Last Man Standing rule would have worked really well, because a pin here just seems completely stupid. Instead of that, what about a match where it’s just Austin beating the living tar out of HHH to try to keep him down, resulting in something absurd to keep him down. He comes close to that by using the chair around the neck of HHH but it doesn’t happen so that’s whatever.

After nearly 20 minutes of the exact same stuff time after time, they go to the back where the Radicalz are waiting. Austin fights them off as HHH tries to run him down again. Because HHH apparently can’t get out of the car in the minute and a half he has, Austin gets him up in a fork lift. After the time off screan for HHH to get out and get a mic on him, he is dropped about 15 feet to the ground with the last thing we hear being him shouting HOLY CRAP!

Do I even need to break down why this is stupid? Number one, he would die. Number two, he could have gotten out of the car about a dozen times. Number three, how in the world are we supposed to hear him when he’s in a car, outside, and on a forklift? Finally, HE WOULD BE DEAD. Naturally he was on Raw the next night. This ends the show as I can’t believe how bad that was.

Rating: D-. This was just bad on nearly every level. Like I said, there’s just no way to make a match work with the storyline that they built up to this with. I get what they were shooting for here, but it was just a complete and total failure. They just didn’t have enough for them to work with here and they had too much time on their hands out there. The Cell really would have worked perfectly here, but I can understand they didn’t want to use it twice in nine months.

The ending was just flat out stupid, plain and simple. Again, I get what they were going for here, but it just didn’t work at all for them. This was more or less the end of the feud for awhile as the main event of Armageddon 2000 was a 6 way HIAC match, which also explains why it’s not being used here.

Austin and HHH would both go for the title soon after this, resulting in an AWESOME 2/3 falls match at No Way Out where HHH won twice in a row. That would be more or less the last time they went at it as far as I can remember, which is good because this was awful and that was great. Anyway, this was just a horrible way to end the show and it left a bad taste in my mouth.

Overall Rating: D+. OH MAN did this show suck. It took me forever to get through it because I just didn’t want to see what was next. There’s some at best ok stuff here, but overall I just didn’t care. It’s practically a transitional show, with Rock/Rikishi, Angle/Taker and Austin/HHH not having legit endings to the feuds. And wouldn’t you know it, the main event for Armageddon was just all six of them in the Cell for the title (Angle retains).

That’s just lazy booking to me, as even then the feuds didn’t have actual endings. The whole show just doesn’t feel like there’s any thought to it, and I can’t help but wonder if the XFL had something to do with that. Vince needs to stick to wrestling and not other random things, because it hurts his primary product. This could have been decent, but it’s a complete failure to me and I’d recommend staying away from it.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2000 (2013 Redo): One After Another

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2000
Date: August 27, 2000
Location: Raleigh Entertainment and Sports Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 18,124
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is another show that I barely remember at all. A lot has changed since last time and it’s dramatically changed the card. To begin with, Austin is out with neck surgery and Rock has ascended to the top of the company. He’ll be defending the title tonight against HHH and upstart star Kurt Angle, a real Olympic gold medalist. On top of that, four guys called the Radicalz have jumped to the WWF, basically burying WCW in the process. The card is stacked on this show so let’s get to it.

The opening video talks about crimes of passion, which refers to Angle trying to steal Stephanie from HHH. The video is set up like an old art house movie and is set to HHH’s old music (Ode to Joy). Rock is involved too but looks like an afterthought. It’s amazing how good these videos can be when someone actually tries, unlike today’s generic hype videos.

JR brags about the gate, which is WEIRD to hear on a WWF show.

Right to Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi

Too Cool and Rikishi are WAY over at this point and even won the tag titles over the summer. The RTC is Richards/Goodfather/Bull Buchanan at this point. Some of Goodfather’s former women come out with Rikishi, one of which would become known as Victoria. It’s a big brawl to start until we get Scotty pounding on Buchanan. Hotty backflips over Buchanan and pulls him down before getting two off a high cross body. Off to Sexay for a double suplex before Goodfather comes in and falls to the floor. He shoves Victoria down before punching Sexay in the face to take over.

Buchanan gets in some shots of his own and it’s off to Richards for his cheap shots. A powerbomb gets two and JR sounds stunned. Steven gets crotched on top and superplexed down allowing for the hot tag to Rikishi. The fat man cleans house and Victoria throws Richards back in the ring. The RTC is sent into the corner with Too Cool being launched into all of them at once, but Bull gets in a quick ax kick to take the Samoan down. Scotty loads up the Worm but Steven kicks his head off for the pin.

Rating: C. Basic six man tag here to get the crowd going. A fast paced act like Too Cool and Rikishi is always a great choice to start up a show as the crowd gets fired up for the entrance and hopefully stays hot for the rest of the show. The RTC was a fine choice for a heel stable as they took away what the fans wanted to see and the people were glad to see them get beaten up.

We see Angle arriving earlier tonight with Stephanie arriving a few minutes later. Later on Kurt went into her locker room with a smile on his face. Angle kissed Stephanie on Smackdown after Stephanie was hurt in a match.

Shane is about to talk about his sister’s actions but Steve Blackman chases him away.

X-Pac vs. Road Dogg

These are the last members of DX but Pac accidentally knocked Dogg through a table on Raw so Dogg walked out on Pac on Smackdown, leaving him alone against Undertaker. X-Pac easily takes him down and slaps Dogg in the back of the head because he can. The fans are all over X-Pac as he is sent to the floor via a shoulder block. Back in and Dogg blocks a spinwheel kick and clotheslines Pac down for no cover. Another kick sends Dogg into the corner but he rolls away from a Bronco Buster attempt.

Back in again and Pac tries a sleeper which shifts into a chinlock. Roadie fights out but this time the spin kick connects for two. There’s the Bronco Buster but Dogg pops up and fires off right hands to take over. The shaky knee drop gets two but the pumphandle slam is countered into the X-Factor which is countered into a spinebuster. Pac counters another pumphandle slam attempt with a low blow and the X- Factor is good for the pin.

Rating: D. This had no business being on PPV at all. It wasn’t even five minutes long and no one liked X-Pac at this point anyway. DX was LONG passed its expiration date at this point and it needed to die a long time ago. Dogg would be gone soon into the new year to hit the inside for awhile.

Post match X-Pac says they’re still a great team but Dogg lays him out with the pumphandle slam. That wasn’t a heel turn because of the low blow earlier.

Eddie sucks up to Chyna (basically in a bikini here) but she says one of them is getting lucky tonight.

Trish says she’s hotter than Chyna but Val Venis doesn’t want to hear about it. Trish was still new at this point and drop dead gorgeous.

Intercontinental Title: Trish Stratus/Val Venis vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chyna

Val is champion and the first fall here gets the title, other than Trish that is. Trish’s little white shorts get a BIG pop as you would expect. The guys start things off with Eddie speeding things up and hitting a jumping back elbow for two. A snap suplex gets the same and Guerrero escapes a powerbomb before clotheslining Val down. Eddie catches Val’s kick to the ribs and whips him around into a Chyna clothesline.

A double flapjack puts Venis down for two and Chyna hits another clothesline for two. Trish tries to get in a cheap shot but the distraction allows Val to take over. A LOUD Chyna chant starts up but Val suplexes her down for two. Chyna avoids a middle rope elbow but her powerbomb is countered with a backdrop. Instead Chyna takes him down with a DDT and it’s back to Eddie to clean house. A springboard hurricanrana gets two on the champion but

Val drops him face first onto the buckle and puts Eddie down with a Blue Thunder Bomb. They headbutt each other to put both guys down but Trish tags herself in and gets two on Eddie. Jerry tries to give the blonde pointers but Eddie easily takes Trish down. Off to Chyna and the mauling is on, but Val breaks up the handspring elbow attempt. Chyna avoids a double team and Eddie pulls Val to the floor, allowing Chyna to gorilla press Trish for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing but the girls looked good enough to carry it. This would be another part of a long storyline as Eddie would cost Chyna the title in about two weeks, accidentally stealing it for himself. Val would split with Trish after this and join up with the Right to Censor for the next few months. Not much to see here other than Trish in the shorts.

Video on Radio WWF from last night with Cole and Foley hosting. This was an idea that didn’t last long at all for obvious reasons. Foley did some dancing (on the radio), Rock called in and the Rock and Sock Connection wound up singing Smackdown Hotel in a segment that only they could pull off.

Stephanie and her bad acting is wondering what she thinks about Kurt. She says he’s a good kisser.

We recap Lawler vs. Tazz. It’s about what you would expect: Tazz talked about being a thug, Lawler didn’t like it, Tazz went after JR but Lawler stepped in, Tazz broke a candy jaw over Jerry’s face and smashed the window of a car JR was in, injuring his eye. Let’s have a match.

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

Tazz comes out with a cowboy hat and a blind man’s cane to really rub in the idea. He takes too long though as Lawler jumps him with a right hand to get us going. They head inside and a dropkick puts Tazz down and follows up with a bunch of right hands to the head. There’s the middle rope punch but a second attempt only hits mat.

Tazz hits some forearms to the back as JR calls him a jackass. Lawler is whipped to the floor so Tazz can talk trash to JR. Back in and Tazz hits what might have been a low blow and goes up for a swanton bomb of all things but Lawler moves. The piledriver connects but Tazz no sells it and the referee is bumped. There’s the Tazzmission on Lawler but JR gets up and smashes the candy jar over Tazz’s head to give Lawler the pin.

Rating: D. What do you expect here? It’s a nothing match which had no business on Summerslam but that’s par for the course a lot of the time. Lawler is harmless enough and at least the win wasn’t clean. Tazz came in so hot but has done almost nothing of note since his debut at the Rumble.

We’re about fifty minutes into this show and it’s been pretty lame stuff so far. Nothing on here couldn’t have been on Raw.

Shane runs from Blackman again but it’s time for his match.

Hardcore Title: Shane McMahon vs. Steve Blackman

Shane took the title from Blackman with the help of a small army on Monday. Steve brings in a kendo stick so Shane runs to the apron. They throw the stick back and forth until Blackman offers him a free shot to the back. Shane picks up the stick but Blackman spins around to block it, starting a chase through the crowd. Blackman finally catches him with a trashcan shot and the beating begins. Shane gets caught in the crowd and some chops to the chest put him down.

We head back to ringside and a bicycle kick to the chest puts Shane down. A trashcan lid shot to the knees puts Shane down and a spinning shot to the back of the head does the same. We bring in more weapons now with trashcans and the hardcore sticks. The can goes over Shane’s head and pounds away with the sticks as JR makes Conan O’Brien references of all things. Blackman hits his belly to back suplex with the sticks (his finisher) but opts to throw Blackman around with a strap instead.

A snapmare off the top with the strap puts Shane down and Blackman puts on a half crab while pulling on the throat with the strap at the same time. This brings out T&A (Test and Albert) for the save and Test drops a top rope elbow onto the can lid onto Blackman’s chest. Shane starts his dancing punches but Blackman kicks the cane lid into his head. Albert takes Steve down again and Shane drops Blackman with a sign to the face.

They go up to the entrance with Test shoving what looked like a speaker over onto Blackman but Steve avoids to prevent death. Blackman finds a kendo stick to take the big guys down but Shane gets in a cheap shot. He runs away and climbs up the set like a crazy man and Blackman goes after him. They go WAY up into the air with Blackman hitting Shane in the back with the stick, knocking him probably thirty feet down onto a crash pad. Blackman climbs down a bit before dropping a big elbow to take the title back.

Rating: B-. Well that woke up the crowd a bit. The dives at the end looked GREAT with Shane continuing to prove that he’s a crazy man. Blackman never came close to this level again because he was just so boring, but this was quite a moment for him. The stuff before the wild part was better than I expected and this was the first match that felt like it belonged on a major show.

Stephanie is freaking out about Shane when Angle comes in. She freaks out so Kurt hugs her but Foley comes in to interrupt. He takes Stephanie with him to check on Shane, leaving Angle annoyed.

We recap Jericho vs. Benoit. Pick a reason for them to be fighting and you have a good feud here. In this case, Benoit has been attacking Jericho and injured his ribs so Jericho retaliated, setting up a back and forth battle with Jericho coming up with an awesome series of rhymes (“I will fight Benoit on a boat or when Chris Benoit is with a goat. I will fight Benoit when he is taking a quiz, and I will make him look like the jackass that he is.”)

Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

This is 2/3 falls just to make it more fun. It’s a big brawl to start with both guys falling to the floor and taking the referee with them. Jericho pounds away at him but charges at Benoit and getting launched into the post. Back in and Benoit takes him down but neither guy can hook their finisher. Jericho hits a release German for two but gets caught in a tombstone shoulder breaker for two. A bulldog puts Benoit down but Benoit gets the knees up and puts on the Crossface for a tapout at a little over three minutes.

Benoit goes right back to the Crossface but Jericho FINALLY makes the rope. Benoit gets back up and puts him in the Tree of Woe to crank on the neck even more. Jericho’s shoulder is sent into the post both on the outside and back inside for two. Benoit sends him into the post yet again but Jericho finally gets in a shot to the face to escape. The comeback is short lived though as Benoit grabs him into a German suplex but Jericho rolls through another one into the Walls in the middle of the ring for the submission at around eight and a half minutes to tie it up.

Jericho gets a quick two off a backbreaker before firing off some HARD chops. A top rope back elbow to Benoit’s jaw gets two but the arm gives off on a powerbomb attempt. Benoit backdrops out of it but Jericho hands on and tries a backslide but Benoit counters into a dragon suplex for two.

Benoit goes up top but gets caught in a great hurricanrana to put both guys down as Jericho landed on his shoulder again. Back up and Jericho hits the flying forearm followed by a spinwheel kick but Benoit grabs the bottom rope at two. The Lionsault connects but Jericho hurts his shoulder again. He grabs a rollup but Benoit counters into one of his own with a grab of the ropes for the pin.

Rating: A-. Yeah this was awesome. Benoit and Jericho could wrestle for an hour a night every night and it would never get boring. Both guys looked great and the arm told a great story to center the match around. This is a big reason why the WWF was so hot this year: you could take any combination of these guys and Angle and have a great match on any show.

HHH arrives over 80 minutes into the show.

We recap the HHH/Stephanie/Angle stuff.

We recap the tag title match. It’s called tables, ladders and chairs. I think that sums it up perfectly well don’t you?

Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

Edge and Christian are defending coming in. The Boyz all battle in the ring to start but the Canadians bring in chairs. The Hardyz take them away but Bubba knocks one back into Jeff’s face. Edge and Christian get in some shots with the chairs to put everyone down and it’s ladder time. Bubba slams the ladder into Edge’s face and DDT’s Christian down as the fans want tables. Matt and Jeff come back in to powerbomb Bubba down and a second ladder is brought in.

Matt and D-Von climb up but it’s Edge climbing up as well to bring them down with a double Russian legsweep. Bubba and Christian climb up and it’s a Bubba Bomb to bring the champion back down. The fans LOVED that one for obvious reasons. Matt shoves down both ladders but Jeff sets one up and climbs for the gold. Edge pulls him down and drops him onto the other ladder, sending it flying up into Matt’s face in a painful spot.

The Conchairto misses Jeff and it’s Bubba picking up the ladder to run everyone over. What’s Up to Edge off the ladder pops the crowd a lot but the GET THE TABLES line gets them even louder. A 3D puts Christian through the table and Bubba wants to kill someone. He and D-Von stack up four tables (two by two) outside the ring and Jeff is their target. Edge saves him with a chair for some reason but Matt lays out Edge with the Twist of Fate.

Both Hardys drop legs from the ladder and Matt lays the ladder down next to Edge. Matt puts Edge inside the ladder and crushes him inside of it before throwing Christian off the top and onto the ladder, destroying Edge even worse. Jeff climbs a ladder outside the ring and tries a Swanton to Bubba but only hits the tables, knocking Jeff out cold. Christian knocks Bubba silly with a chair on the floor to put him down.

Back in the ring and the big ladder is set up with everyone but Bubba and Jeff going up. Christian hits the reverse DDT to pull Matt down and the other two go down at the same time. It’s a drunk looking Bubba coming back in and climbing the ladder but Edge and Christian gets up and shoves him through the four tables at ringside. The champions both climb but here’s Lita to shove the ladder over, crotching them both on the top rope.

Matt goes up but D-Von shoves the ladder backwards, sending Matt back first through a pair of tables in a SCARY bump. Edge spears Lita down, drawing a bad swear from JR. D-Von is climbing but somehow Jeff is on the other side. Both guys grab a belt but Edge moves the ladder, leaving both guys hanging. D-Von is knocked down and the Canadians spear Jeff in the ribs with a ladder to bring him down. Everyone else is dead so Edge and Christian go up and get the belts to retain.

Rating: A. These six guys have a great match involving ladders. Imagine that. This match holds up incredibly well but the sequel would somehow be even better. That’s the biggest problem with this match: people remember the sequel instead of this one. The table bumps in this were great with Bubba and Matt destroying anything they landed on. It’s a great carnage match and is worth checking out if you haven’t seen it in awhile.

HHH demands an explanation from Stephanie so she blames Kurt for the whole thing. They’re husband and wife and he hasn’t asked her about this in THREE DAYS?

The Kat vs. Terri

This is a thong stinkface match which tells you everything you need to know. Al Snow and Perry Saturn are the respective seconds. They don’t even bother with the pretenses and start in swimsuits. I’m not even going to bother with this: the girls look decent, there’s a lot of catfighting, Kat hits a Bronco Buster, Saturn interferes, the roll each other up out of sheer stupidity, the referee is headbutted low, a shot with Snow’s Head knocks Terri out and Kat gets the win. Moving on.

The APA is at WWF New York.

We recap Kane vs. Undertaker. Kane attacked his brother because he’s a monster and that’s about it.

Kane vs. Undertaker

This is the first time for Biker Taker vs. Kane. It’s a brawl in the aisle to start with Taker sending Kane face first into the post. Taker gets inside and starts ripping at the mask but Kane fights back with right hands in the corner. Kane brings in a chair but Taker fires off punches to the ribs to block the shot. It’s Kane who gets hit with the chair first and Taker tears part of the mask off. You can see the left side of Kane’s forehead and the big fried freak is MAD.

He rams Undertaker into the barricade a few times but Taker kicks the steps into Kane’s face. The steps are LAUNCHED at Kane’s head to take him down and it’s time for the full mask to be pulled off. Back in and Kane gets in a low blow and MAN is he busted open. Taker won’t go down from right hands and spears Kane down before going after the mask again. A low blow breaks up Kane’s chokeslam and the mask is pulled off! Kane bails before we can see anything and Taker wins.

Rating: C. This is a hard one to grade as it’s not a match at all but a big fight the whole way through. Biker Taker was still new at this point so a match like this did a lot as far as getting him over. I use the word match loosely as JR didn’t even hear the bell ring (it did but it didn’t change much). Kane would float around for the next several months (shocking I know) before the Invasion started up.

Angle calls someone.

Stephanie is giving HHH a pep talk when the phone rings. She freaks out when she answers it and says Hi Mom. HHH wants to say hi to Linda but the “reception” cuts out. Nice scene there.

We recap the world title match. HHH vs. Angle you know and Rock vs. HHH has been a war since before Wrestlemania. Rock really felt like an afterthought here but that’s ok given his issues with HHH still being relatively fresh.

WWF World Title: HHH vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Fink makes sure to tell us there are no countouts or disqualifications. Before the match Angle apologizes for not kissing Stephanie sooner. He’s an Olympic gold medalist and earned those medals by not backing down. He runs his mouth about giving Stephanie some real passion and that’s more than HHH can take. The Game storms the ring and the brawl is on before the bell. HHH shoes the referee down and Angle hits a Cactus Clothesline to take them both to the floor.

They head to the announcer table and HHH loads up a Pedigree…..and the table breaks before HHH jumps, sending Angle face first into the concrete, legitimately knocking him out cold. HHH checks on Angle before pulling out the hammer. Rock comes out to keep things from falling apart as Angle is taken out on a stretcher. In other words, we’re stuck watching Rock vs. HHH for the next twenty minutes. Well if you insist.

They brawl on the floor with Rock sending HHH into the announce table before heading back inside for HHH to pound on Rock in the corner. HHH looks down as Angle is being wheeled out and Rock gets in some right hands but the Game drapes Rock over the top rope, sending him out to the floor. HHH chases Angle down and pulls the stretcher back to the ring before getting in some right hands which are pretty dangerous given his actual injury. Rock makes the save to let Angle be taken back for the needed medical attention.

HHH loads up a Pedigree on the floor but Rock counters into a catapult into the steel set. Angle is still in the arena as Rock takes HHH back to ringside. He hits HHH low as Stephanie is checking on Kurt. Rock is sent into the post and we head inside with Stephanie now at ringside. HHH doesn’t want her here but since she is he tells her to get the belt. Stephanie brings it in and “hits” HHH in the face with it by mistake to give Rock two. Rock tries to pull Stephanie into the ring but HHH hits him low to save. Stephanie bails to the back and we’re back to one on one.

Rock fires back with the jumping clothesline and the fans are very hot for this. HHH rolls to the floor and brings the sledgehammer in again. Rock gets in a right hand but the Game hits him in the ribs with the hammer. HHH fires off kicks to the ribs and some shoulders in the corner for good measure. A facebuster gets two on Rock and HHH stays on the ribs. We head back to the floor with Rock’s back being sent into the post. Back in and HHH stomps on the ribs even more but Rock comes back with a swinging neckbreaker.

Yet another knee to the champion’s ribs takes him down and HHH goes up top. Rock comes back and supereplexes HHH down and we cut to Stephanie begging Angle to come back to the ring to help HHH. The Game finally rolls over and covers Rock for two but Rock gets the same on a belly to belly. Stephanie is literally dragging Angle back to the ring so he can trip Rock, allowing HHH to hit the Pedigree. Angle breaks up the pin and sends HHH into the steps before trying to steal the title for himself in a great false finish.

A quick belly to belly gets two on Rock and Stephanie isn’t moving towards the fallen HHH at all. Rock hits a belly to belly throw and a DDT for two on Kurt before whipping Angle into HHH, knocking the Game into the barricade. Rock Bottom gets two on Angle as HHH saves before sending Rock into the post. HHH tells Stephanie to get the hammer but Angle gets it first. HHH kicks Angle in the ribs and goes for a right hand but hits Stephanie by mistake. Kurt knocks HHH out with the hammer but Rock breaks it up. The People’s Elbow to HHH retains the title.

Rating: B. Like I said, if I have to watch HHH vs. Rock for fifteen minutes plus then so be it. Angle being injured that early made for an interesting ending here as the majority of the match was heavily improvised. The HHH vs. Stephanie stuff would be cranked up even higher when Angle would win the WWF Title the next month.

Angle carries Stephanie out to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. The first half took a bit to get through but the last few matches are all great. This was still a great time in the WWF as you had everything clicking and all the big matches being better than you would expect. Austin would be back in a few months to bring things up even higher. Great show here and a forgotten classic.

Ratings Comparison

Right to Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi

Original: B-

Redo: C

X-Pac vs. Road Dogg

Original: C-

Redo: D

Val Venis/Trish Stratus vs. Eddie Guerrero/Chyna

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

Original: C+

Redo: D

Steve Blackman vs. Shane McMahon

Original: B

Redo: B-

Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A

Redo: A-

Dudley Boys vs. Edge and Christian vs. hardy Boys

Original: A-

Redo: A

The Kat vs. Terri

Original: F-

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Kane

Original: B

Redo: C

The Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

Original: B

Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: A-

As always I rated things a bit higher back then.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/03/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2000-why-does-no-one-remember-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2000 (Original): That One

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2000
Date: August 27, 2000
Location: Raleigh Entertainment and Sports Arena, Raleigh, North Carolina
Attendance: 17,002
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Another year, and another Summerslam. We have no Austin at the moment, but he’s coming back very soon from neck surgery. In his absence, HHH and Rock have shot to the moon in popularity with Rock being the face of the company at the moment and the reigning WWF Champion. His opponents are HHH and Angle, who had a double pin in a triple threat with Jericho. Also, they’re feuding over Stephanie.

We also have biker Taker vs. Kane, and the first ever TLC match with the three teams that you would expect to be in a TLC match. We’re just on the verge of being out of the Attitude Era as WCW knows they’re a dying breed at this point and would be out of business in about 8 months. Therefore, WWF has won and they’re still pouring it on with the Attitude Era, but with Austin gone a lot of the edge has left, as the gap is nowhere near as big as it once was between him and the rest of the roster.

Either way, WWF is no longer dominating but is victorious in the wars with just the final surrender to go. This is the last Summerslam before the takeover of WCW, so let’s see if it’s as good as the rest of the Attitude Era.

This intro is out there. It’s all in sepia, which is that gray color you see in old movies. It’s a bunch of odd scenes and looks like something you see on an acid trip, mixed in with wrestling clips. It shows kind of a highlight package of the main feud, which makes me think that the main event should have been Rock vs. someone else (not sure who, maybe Jericho or Benoit) and HHH vs. Angle in a separate match.

One of the clips in this is the Trish bent over in front of HHH scene, which is still one of the best done comedy moments in the history of the WWF in my opinion. We get the pyro etc. as Ross and Lawler welcome us.

Right To Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi

It’s the Lee special as Steven Richards, Bull Buchanan and Goodfather are the RTC tonight, with Val coming later I guess. It’s hard to believe that Rikishi would be revealed as the man that ran over Austin in less than two months. Ok, the name plates for the wrestlers are going to be a problem. When they come on the screen or go off the screen they make this weird sounds and it sounds like someone is knocking on my window.

In case you don’t know, RTC was a parody of the PTC, which in essence is a company that whines and complains about how everything on TV is poisoning children’s minds. There’s a massive rant that I’m holding back here that could go on for about four pages but I’ll spare you from it. Anyway, they try to censor anything they don’t like, and they don’t like Rikishi’s thong. Too Cool and the fat guy come out with two of Godfather’s former Hos, one of which is known as Victoria.

Victoria in a short skirt dancing is something that we need a LOT more of. Apparently the WWF Title match is no holds barred. The crowd starts chanting save the gardening equipment. Yeah that joke sucks but I couldn’t help it. More or less this turns into Rikishi dominating against the other three while Too Cool do nothing at all. In other words, it’s a standard Too Cool and Rikishi match. He goes for the stink face, which is an abomination on wrestling if I’ve ever seen one.

It (thankfully) doesn’t happen as Bull kicks him in the head. Scotty goes for the Worm which is even worse than the other move, but I become a Stevie fan as he kicks Scotty’s head off and pins him. Short and sweet, just how I like it.

Rating: B-. It was a fast opener which is perfect for a PPV. For some reason the crowd always loved Too Cool, despite the fact that they completely sucked. I loved that we didn’t have to see either of those horrid moves though, so that’s a plus. Also, I like when the heels win the opening match. It makes the faces winning later that much better.

We get a recap of what happened on Heat, which is both Kurt and Stephanie arriving. I might as well explain the backstory here. Kurt had been flat out hitting on Stephanie for weeks but nothing ever came of it. Three days prior to this on Smackdown, there was a match where Kurt and HHH were in it at the same time. I think it was a tag but I don’t remember. Either way, Stephanie got knocked down and ala Hulk and Liz from 1989, Kurt took her to the locker room.

He kept apologizing and eventually kissed her, which she seemed to like. Anyway, both of them get here tonight with Kurt getting there first. Coach (in 2000? REALLY?) asks both of them questions which aren’t answered. Once Stephanie gets there, she asks if HHH has shown up yet and is told no. She hears that Kurt is here and asks which way he went. He went to the left, so Stephanie goes to the right.

Shane is being interviewed about Stephanie, but Steve Blackman, his opponent for later is near him and he runs off.

And now, submitted for your appreciation, following the frustration which led to a separation and then this altercation which spells the decimation of the degeneration, here is the initiation which I hope isn’t an abomination.

Sorry when Road Dogg starts talking that just comes over me. Anyway, DX has split and this is the result if you don’t speak rhyme.

Road Dogg vs. X-Pac

Short version: they’ve been fighting and Pac accidentally knocked Road Dogg through a table on Raw Monday night. We see a clip of these two against Taker in a handicap match, and Taker’s outfit is I guess leather pants and a Taker t-shirt. I’m not sure if I like it or not but it’s just very different looking. As we’re under way, Ross says that there are people that consider these two to be one of the best tag teams of all time.

I’m not sure if I should go with the X-Pac doesn’t look like Billy Gunn joke, or the how blind are you people joke. Either way, that’s just preposterous and….and….and that’s a hard word to rhyme so I’ll just skip it. It’s odd to think of but out of these two, Road Dogg is pretty comparable to X-Pac as far as their overall resumes go.

He has 7 tag title reigns (two were in TNA) and an IC and Hardcore title reign, while Pac has some cruiser/light heavyweight reigns and two Euro titles to go with 4 tag titles that only two of which are even remembered. I’ll take an IC reign over two Euros any day, but that’s a different point all together. The fans don’t like this for some reason, which is odd as it’s not a bad match at all.

I guess this is the famous X-Pac heat? I actually think that’s what it is as that was happening when he was in control but the fans are into it when he’s getting beaten up. Both guys were built up as faces coming into this though, so he’s not supposed to be the heel here. Granted the low blow that he uses to set up the X-Factor would suggest otherwise. That ends the match. He of course has to grab a mic though, and says there’s no hard feelings.

Dogg doesn’t and hits the pump handle. X-Pac I guess just turned heel? If he did it was horrid. Road Dogg was actually pretty over here, which is why I’ll never get why he never got a solid push. He was good in the ring, he was WAY over and he could talk. That sounds like the makings of a decent push to me.

Rating: C-. It just wasn’t there for me. It’s not bad, but it’s just not that interesting. In a match like this, someone needs to make the big heel turn before the match. Now Dogg’s best strength was on the mic so turning him would make no sense, as he needs to talk to get over as well as he does. The fans already hate Waltman, so I think he’s your guy. Either way, this just didn’t do it for me and while it was ok, it’s just ok and that’s not good in my eyes.

Eddie and Chyna are talking as Chyna is apparently more or less going to wrestle in a bikini. I’ve made my stance clear on Chyna from this era, so I’ll save the drooling for later. We cut to Val and Trish’s locker room, which is a partnership that I don’t remember at all. Trish is babbling about how she should be a centerfold before Chyna is, which is foreshadowing the Playboy shoot that was coming for Chyna. Val says that’s not important but the IC Title is.

IC Title: Trish/Val Venis vs. Chyna/Eddie Guerrero

Just like at last year’s Summerslam when Santino and Beth won the titles, this is for the IC where whomever gets the fall winning the belt. So yeah I guess somehow Trish could win the title here. Ok according to Ross if Trish wins, nothing changes. Well that’s nonsense. Lawler comments on the name graphics on the screen, thinking it’s someone knocking. That’s actually accurate.

The guys start us out as I think gender vs. gender is legal here. It’s very weird hearing the announcers talk about Trish being horrible in the ring and needing all kinds of help to do basic things. After a decent sequence between the guys Chyna comes in and easily holds her own against Val. She was something incredibly special to say the least.

No Trish yet as Val stops the tag to Eddie, spitting at him. The problem is that it costs him as he takes a low blow and a DDT. The tag brings in Eddie as we still have no hot Canadian. Blue Thunder Bomb gets two on Eddie. We get a shot of Trish and it blows my mind that they found someone as beautiful as her with the ability she had.

Trish finally comes in and of course has nothing at all. Chyna comes in to feast on her for a bit, which is probably not the best wording at all but who cares? Val stops the handspring elbow that I want to smack Muta for making a staple of Diva matches. Eddie intercepts Val and it’s girl on girl. Guess how that goes for the blonde. Press slam drop makes Chyna the champion.

Rating: D+. A lot of that rating is for the hotness factor. It’s really hard to believe that Trish was actually this bad at one point. The match was ok, but I’ve never liked matches like these. If nothing else, get another Canadian (Test maybe?) and just have a fatal four way. You can get the same result and you have a better wrestler on top of that. However, Chyna looked ridiculously hot and Trish was gorgeous as well, so that’s enough for a passing grade.

We see a party at WWF New York with Cole and Foley hosting. Some others show up and it ends with Foley dancing with Too Cool and singing with Rock. This had to be one of the coolest ideas ever, but there was no way to keep it working well.

Stephanie proves why she might be the worst actress of all time as she talks about Kurt’s kiss with the makeup lady.

We get a recap of Tazz vs. Lawler. More or less Tazz was ticked off at JR for saying Tazz was a thug, which was what Tazz always called himself. Lawler defended him, and we get this out of it. This was actually a pretty decently built up feud I thought, with Tazz beating up JR in a car and then Lawler afterwards. It’s better than it sounds.

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

During the car attack Ross’ eye was hurt and Tazz makes fun of that on his way there, which is actually pretty funny. He really was an underrated performer. I also love how everything can be forgiven by a simple face turn in wrestling. Lawler in white boots just looks weird for some reason. Teddy Long is the referee as you never know who you’ll see in a match sometimes.

Lawler of course is beating the heck out of him at first only to get caught later on. JR is so pro King it’s sad, although the storyline goes that way so it makes sense. Tazz goes up and tries what I guess we would call a Swanton Bomb, but it misses, Lawler pulls the strap down and piledrives Tazz, but he’s up before Lawler is. Ref gets bumped. Now if I know Lawler, and I’ve seen a lot of his stuff, I’m betting on an international object being hidden in his tights.

Anyone want to take a bet on that with me? Actually I’m wrong as Lawler gets choked out, but Ross slams a candy jar into Tazz’s head to break it up and let Lawler pin him. The odd thing is, and I’m guess this is what inspired it, at Wrestlemania that year Tazz got hit in the face with a candy jar like that in a hardcore match and it damaged his eye.

If I remember the reports correctly, it was Tazz that was supposed to get Benoit’s push. Now there’s something to think about. Another thing to think about: I like Lawler’s music.

Rating: C+. This was a simple storyline that needed a simple resolution and that’s what we got here. Lawler is always dependable in the ring and this was no exception. Ross getting involved is a nice little treat that you rarely see, although he likely should have been fired in kayfabe for that. Anyway, this was just a fun short match to let the old guys have a nice moment, and there’s nothing wrong with taking ten minutes, including the lead in and intros etc., to do that on a three hour show.

Lillian, who is A, somehow STILL not the ring announcer and B, looking WAY hotter with curled hair, tries to talk to Shane but he runs again because of Blackman, and their match is next.

Hardcore Title: Steve Blackman vs. Shane McMahon

Shane runs to the ring holding the belt. As he’s running we see how he won it, which was using the 24/7 rule and the help of Edge, Christian, Test and Albert. That’s how much of a hardcore god Blackman was at the time. Anyway, Shane is running scared here as he finally has to defend it. The bell rings twice, so I guess the match never actually happens, but why am I using logic in the WWF?

In a funny spot Shane and Blackman play pass the kendo stick, but in a cool spot, Blackman grabs the stick out of Shane’s hands mid swing and beats him with it. That looked quite cool actually. This is in the ring all of 8 seconds and JR and King are making Survivor references, as at the time that was the hottest show in the world. Now it’s still big I guess, but has anyone watched it in forever? This is a total beatdown so far as Blackman is just killing Shane.

I completely mark out as a garbage can is put on Shane and Blackman beats him half to death with sticks, allowing JR to say that it reminded him of Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7. That was just flat out awesome as we get a Conan reference on Summerslam. That is just so freaking sweet. Anyway, nerd boy moment over. Leather strap is brought in and tied to Shane, which is always fun.

We need more Texas Bullrope matches, and I mean the touch four corners kind. Shane is more or less hogtied in a submission hold that looks SICK, but Test and Albert run in for the save. JR goes through the history of Shane and Test and Stephanie which sounds like it’s a parody of a soap opera that it’s so cheesy. The sweet elbow of Test hits Steve so this match is a success.

They fight up to the entrance where Blackman is able to beat up the muscle guys, but Shane keeps running. However, he runs out of places to run, so he climbs one of the towers. What happens next is freaking scary, as Shane goes probably 30-35 feet up (of course called 50-75 by JR, since 25 feed is such an easy mistake to make in a place that small).

Blackman follows and slams him in the back with a kendo stick until Shane falls the whole way in a shot that looks awesome. Blackman climbs down about 10 feet before dropping an elbow/leg onto Shane then covering him for the title. Ross tries to compare it to Foley’s Cell dive, and I just shake my head. BIG difference between landing on a table and then concrete and falling backwards onto a crash pad there fat boy.

Rating: B. Not even factoring in the huge spot at the end, this was a standard enjoyable hardcore match, with all kinds of weapons and Shane getting beaten up. They tried so hard to make Blackman a big deal here, but the problem was the division was just a novelty, and Blackman was gone soon after this if I remember correctly. I know he was gone by the Invasion which was less than a year away.

In a scene that cracks me up, Stephanie is freaking over Shane, but isn’t near him, despite him being in the same building. Her not even leaving her room just makes me laugh. Kurt comes in to hug her and Foley, who for no reason at all is wearing a Minnesota Twins jersey, comes in and says that Stephanie should go check on Shane, which apparently she couldn’t figure out on her own?

We get a recap of Benoit vs. Jericho. Good grief this was intense. The video package is really well done as you can see that these two just want to go at it. It’s clear they’re the future along with Angle and the company knew it, which is always a good thing. The match is 2/3 falls by the way.

Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

You really don’t even need a story here with guys of this level, but the basic story is they don’t like each other. There it is, and I like it better that way. Who needs a big elaborate story? They knew that these two would put on a clinic so why over complicate things? They of course start hot with them both going to the corner and in a spot that you don’t often see, all three including the referee go through the ropes and crash on the floor.

That’s not something you see often but I like it. The WOO on the chops is always fun to hear. Now we get to something that I just don’t like. Benoit gets the crossface and Jericho taps in something like four minutes. Ok, now I get that it’s 2/3 falls and Jericho should want to keep the amount of damage he takes to a minimum. Heck, Lawler flat out says that it would be smart to tap here. I get that.

However, no matter how you want to say it, Benoit beat Jericho in like 4 minutes. Isn’t there some better way to do this? Couldn’t you do the first fall at like 9 minutes into the match? It’s not like this is going to be a five minute match or anything, so what’s the rush? I really don’t get that as it makes Benoit look capable of making Jericho tap with no difficulty and it makes Jericho look kind of weak.

I get the giving up quickly, but don’t make Jericho look like he has no defense at all for the hold. Rant over. Second fall starts immediately which is good as I’ve always hated the whole rest thing. This isn’t boxing. The stupidity of the end of the first fall is compounded here as Benoit immediately puts the hold back on and Jericho gets to the ropes. See what I mean? Why wouldn’t you just reverse that sequence?

He gets out the first time and then later on he can’t because his shoulder is hurting from the first time in the hold. Doesn’t that make a bit more sense? In something quite surprising, Benoit somewhat abandons psychology. They make it clear that the seconds crossface is focused more on the back, but after having that one on much longer, Benoit works on the neck and shoulder. Wouldn’t it make more sense to go after what was more injured?

I guess since he got the tap on the neck/shoulder he should go to it again, but then why would he change what got a tap in the first place? Wouldn’t it make sense that if a little pain made him tap more pain would make him tap again? Dang when did I start thinking like this? Anyway, the holds that Benoit is using here are freaking sick looking.

We get the comeback from Jericho though as he just starts throwing these big haymaker right hands. I’ve never seen him throw punches like this but they’re working for him. We get a nice wrestling sequence that ends up with Jericho getting the Liontamer, not the Walls but the Liontamer on Benoit for the tap out. These two have perhaps the most lethal looking submissions ever. Might have to have a thread about that in the near future.

This is why I like doing these threads. I get good ideas from them. They go into a fast sequence of counters and big moves, with the big one being Jericho hitting a hurricanrana from the top and after a two a lionsault but due to the shoulder he can’t cover.

They do several rollups but Benoit gets a small package near the corner and grabs the bottom rope to get the win. Apparently this was enough to get Benoit in the main event of Unforgiven, as he had just lost in the main event at Fully Loaded to Rock a month prior to this.

Rating: A. This was great stuff. The first two falls were both good enough, but they tore it up in the third one. It was exactly what you would expect from these two and it absolutely delivered on all levels. Somehow, this might not be the best that these two have had so good grief. How insane were these two, especially when you add in Kurt? Thank goodness the company got these three right.

HHH is just now arriving, so we hit the recap button on the Stephanie/Kurt interaction from earlier tonight, as well as the Smackdown kiss. This really has no bearing on anything, as we’re off to our next match.

We get the story of the three teams, which more or less is this: Edge and Christian hit the other four guys with chairs, they beat up Edge and Christian with ladders and tables, so let’s put all 6 guys and three weapons in one match and make it for the tag titles. Now you 6, go tear the freaking house down.

Tag Titles: Dudleyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

In case you didn’t get it, this is the first TLC match. Tables and ladders and chairs, oh my, for all you Wizard of Oz aficionados out there. I’ve always liked the incoming missile thing that they did for the Dudleys entrance. The glasses need to come back for Bubba too. Oh yeah this is in North Carolina, so the Hardys get a small explosion. Chairs are in play quickly. Bear with me here as I’ve never tried to do one of these, so this could be a bit tricky.

Matt just pelts the thing at Bubba which sounds sick. The opening here is just a wild brawl all around, and what else were you expecting? However, you can tell they have a lot of this planned out, and there’s not a thing wrong with that. The big spots at least make sense here, unlike some matches with gimmicks where it’s just big spot after big spot and it rarely works out that well.

In another, say it with me, SICK spot, Jeff is climbing the ladder but Edge knocks him off. Now that doesn’t sound like much, but he lands on a ladder that’s on its side, so his ribs slam into the leg of it. This sea saws the other end up which slams Matt in the face. What’s Up leads to D-Von being given a fairly famous command.

You know I’ve always wondered what would happen if D-Von pulled a Punk and just said no. “D-Von, GET THE TABLES!” No jerk. You ran out when we were at IHOP last night and I had to pay for your 14 pancakes. Get your own tables you big fat butter ball! To make room, someone picks up a ladder and just throws it at Jeff, covering him up with ladders and chairs. We get a new shout from Bubba: D-Von! We’re gonna kill them! Yeah, that’s not over the top at all.

Edge lands three of the loudest and most painful looking chair shots in a row. Those things were just freaking intense. In another huge spot, Jeff does the twenty foot swanton and of course, misses. Edge is a freaking master with those chairs. Bubba is sent through four tables, leaving E/C alone to get the belts. However, Lita sprints to ringside and shoves them both off.

After various other amounts of destruction, including Edge just laying Lita out with a freaking great spear, Jeff and D-Von go up, but the ladder goes out and they’re stuck hanging there. D-Von goes down, so Edge and Christian more or less harpoon him with a ladder, then climb up and get the belts to retain. Kind of a not great ending, but DANG. Bubba is screwed up bad.

Rating: A-. This was a wild mess of a match, but dang. These six knew what they had to do and they nailed it. It was a wild match with all kinds of crazy bumps and wild spots. The scariest thing of all: this will be blown away in April by TLC 2. If you don’t get excited watching this, I feel you’re no longer alive.

Since we haven’t seen enough of this one story tonight, HHH is yelling at Stephanie about the kiss. You know, Rock hasn’t even been mentioned tonight. This is why the one on one would have been better and then find someone else to plug into the main event. Maybe do the fatal fourway that they did next month here. Oh yeah Steph says the kiss meant nothing.

Oh and since we just had an amazing match, let’s completely kill the momentum.

Stinkface Match: Kat vs. Terr

I think you get the idea by the name alone, and yes, it’s as bad as it sounds. Kat, who was married to Lawler in real life but was released soon thereafter, comes out with Al Snow for no apparent reason to a weak version of Sable’s music. Terri comes out with Saturn and just strips on the way in.

That’s just the best way to be: just accept your status. You know, I hate these things. There’s no point, there’s no skill, and it’s just flat out stupid. You know what? Screw this. This is stupid and it’s not worth my time. Kat wins.

Rating: F-. I’m not 12 years old. This means nothing to me, and it was a complete waste of time. They couldn’t give the tag titles an extra five minutes, but they can do this. Unbelievable.

APA is in WWF New York as bartenders. That would just be cool to do.

Recap of Taker and Kane. This just amuses me. It started with Kane saving Taker from Benoit, which good night I would have loved to see a real feud between those two. Anyway, within seconds of Kane saving him, he turns heel and beats up Taker. For some reason, this amazes JR and Cole. Why? Why does that amaze you?

It’s not like HE DOES THAT EVERY FREAKING TIME HE UNITES WITH TAKER or anything like that. These two fight more often than Sly and I do, and nothing is ever resolved. Anyway, of course we have this match here tonight. Oh and Kane beat up Taker with a chair a few days ago or something.

Undertaker vs. Kane

Taker is the American here and comes out first which is a little weird. His pop is insane to put it mildly. Taker just goes down the aisle and fights him early. Based on the commentary, you know this is going to be short. I wonder if one of them was hurt. In something almost weird for some reason, Taker is going for the mask. As JR says, has anyone ever done that? Not that I remember at least.

I guess it’s no holds barred as Kane brings in a chair and nothing happens. The announcers touch on this as they say the referee has said he’s just going to let them go, That kind of makes sense, as it’s not like he can do anything to either guy to stop them. Taker actually gets about half of Kane’s mask off. Kane messes up and slams the stairs into his own face, followed by Taker just picking them up and throwing the stairs at Kane, which is more or less impossible to fake.

Kane is bleeding bad after the stairs. By bad I mean terribly fake looking as the blood is closer to pink than red. Taker with a freaking spear, and actually a pretty good one. They both set for a chokeslam but Taker just kicks him in the balls. He rips the mask off and Kane runs, ending this…match? His long hair and hand covers it up. Taker’s music plays as JR asks if the bell ever rang.

Rating: B. I LOVED this. It was more or less a long segment, but who cares? This was just Taker being ticked off, and when that happens, it works very well. At the end of it Kane was just getting beaten up and Taker looked awesome. This is what it should have been and it went off well. It’s not like they were trying to top Mania 14, and they shouldn’t have.

Kurt is in the back, not in wrestling gear which is bad because his match is next. He calls someone, and we cut to HHH and Stephanie. Of course the phone rings and Stephanie pretends it’s Linda. HHH asks to talk to her, but “Linda” hangs up. Stephanie looks like a goddess in the graphic to put it mildly.

We get the same recap that we’ve seen five times tonight, so I won’t bother with the story all over again.

WWF Title: Rock vs. HHH vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is dressed in record time and weighs in at 229lbs. That’s light even for him. He says that he’s sorry he didn’t kiss her earlier. As he’s known for doing, he puts his foot in his mouth and says that he gave Stephanie more passion that HHH ever could. HHH comes out and to say he’s mad is the understatement of the millennium. They start without Rock, or I should say HHH starts without him.

Rock is smart and doesn’t come out for a few minutes. They hit the announce table and HHH sets for a Pedigree, but the table breaks early and Angle is legit hurt. It’s worse than Lesnar’s face was after the shooting star. I mean he is gone. HHH pulls the hammer but he can’t hit him, IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLll What the Rock is cooking! That music is just freaking awesome.

Since Kurt is injured, we pretty much have Rock vs. HHH, which has been the main event all summer, so it’s not like this is a bad thing. HHH beats Rock down just a bit and runs after the EMTs who are taking Angle out on a stretcher to beat on him a bit more. Rock sprints down the aisle and perhaps literally saves Kurt. They brawl back to the ring and Stephanie comes out to check on Kurt.

Stephanie, clad in ridiculously tight leather pants, comes down and gets yelled at by HHH. She runs over to grab the belt and lands a running slap to the timekeeper that is just hilarious to say the least. She misses and hits HHH though. Seriously, that running slap was GREAT. It just came off as hilarious on about 1000 levels. Game comes back with a low blow though, and that’s the end of my rhyming.

Lawler makes a nose joke about HHH which just seems out of place here. Sister Sledge comes back into play here, as HHH nails Rock with it in the ribs. JR has a small seizure about the hammer as he just shouts and shouts some more. After about eight minutes of these two nearly killing each other, we cut to Stephanie and Kurt in the back with her begging him to come save HHH. If they somehow faked that, I’d be amazed to say the least.

Although, Rock coming out at that exact second is a bit fishy. I’d think he’s legit hurt, but I guess there’s a slight chance that it was fake. They come back out again, with a great shot of Stephanie’s back. For about the 5th time in this match, HHH looks backwards to see if Kurt is there for his spot and it’s really getting bad. It’s so painfully obvious that it’s sad. Angle either wasn’t hurt or it wasn’t nearly as bad as they thought, or he’s completely nuts. He’s staggering all over the place.

The more I look at Kurt the more I think he was just shaken up. He’s moving around better every second and is doing moves that you’d need a lot of mental capacity to do. It’s him and Rock at the moment until HHH saves Angle from being pinned from a Rock Bottom. Stephanie gets back in again after Kurt brings a hammer back in to cause JR to need his medicine. HHH misses a punch and nails Steph, so Kurt nails him with the hammer.

Rock knocks Angle outside and lands the Elbow to retain. He grabs the belt and leaves, posing on the Summerslam set as Angle carries Stephanie out to end the show. Angle would take the title from Rock two months later and hold it until No Way Out.

Rating: B. This was a fine match, as it was mainly HHH vs. Rock, which is always solid. I’m still not sure if Angle was hurt or not, but if he wasn’t then he deserves a raise. This was good enough, but I’m not sure if it’s good enough to be a main event of a major show. I stand by what I said about how it should have been Angle vs. HHH and maybe Rock vs. Taker or Kane as that angle was thrown together in about 10 days. Either way, this was fine.

BUT WAIT!

My version has a post show segment in studio with Coach, so I’ll throw this in as a bonus. Coach, with more hair on his head and less on his face, is going through all of the matches in a highlight package and introducing some of the wrestlers for interviews. Cool.

RTC says they had fun censoring Too Cool, including a Bull Buchanan speech, which is interesting, as he has a thick southern accent. Richards clearly should have been the only one to talk.

Coach doesn’t like RTC. He skips X-Pac and Road Dogg for no apparent reason and jumps to the IC match.

Chyna and Eddie are both happy that she’s the champion and she couldn’t do it without Eddie. This would lead to a pretty simple yet decent angle with them semi feuding over th belt.

Tazz says that the path of rage is coming back. Actually that’s not true as he was turned face very soon.

Coach doesn’t like Tazz.

Blackman actually cuts a promo, saying that the belt is back around his waist when it’s on his shoulder, and that Shane walked away, when he was actually stretchered out. And we wonder why he wasn’t allowed to talk.

Benoit says that he has made his point.

Coach doesn’t like Benoit but he respects him.

Recap of TLC, which is just sweet all over.

Edge and Christian say they’ll be ok. They actually sound like they lost if you just listen to their words.

Women’s match. Moving on.

Taker says he’s the big dog in the yard, which became a semi catchphrase for him. He tells Kane to never cross him again, leaves, and then comes back to swear. That’s just comical.

Finally, we recap the main event. No interviews here.

I liked this actually. It’s perfect for a home video as it offers a little bonus reason to buy the tape with the exclusive interviews. It’s a nice little addition and it’s only about 10 minutes long, so it’s not bogged down. I like it.

Overall Rating: A. This is a VERY good show, and bordering on classic. The only thing possibly is the main event, which likely should have been Rock vs. HHH or HHH vs. Angle for the title with Rock doing something else. Either way, the show is just great all around with only the women’s match being terrible.

Other than that, everything is good to great. Definitely a big time recommendation here as it was just flat out awesome. Find a copy of this and watch it all, as only about 5 minutes is bad. GREAT show.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

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Wrestlemania Count-Up – Wrestlemania XVII (2019 Redo): The Peak Of Wrestling

IMG Credit: WWE

So it’s been a bit of a rough start to the year for me so I picked the redos myself this year so I’d have a bit of fun. Here’s the first, with a second to come, plus last year’s show.

Wrestlemania XVII
Date: April 1, 2001
Location: Astrodome, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 67,925
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

Do I even need to explain this one? It’s one of the all time legendary classics if not THE all time legendary classic and maybe the greatest show in wrestling history. I’ve seen this show more times than I can count thanks to a VHS that a buddy of mine made for me of the original broadcast. As for the card, it’s Austin vs. Rock II and that’s all you need to know. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Grandmaster Sexay/Steve Blackman vs. X-Pac/Justin Credible

It’s so strange to hear these theme songs at this show. It feels like something that belongs in a video game only. Believe it or not there’s actually a bit of a setup for this as Sexay recruited Blackman to team with him earlier today because those feet could be great for dancing. X-Pac and Credible are part of X-Factor, and have Albert (A-Train/Prince Albert/whatever else you want to call him) in their corner.

The good guys clean house to start and X-Pac misses a Bronco Buster in the corner. Albert gets in a clothesline from the apron so X-Pac can take over, including stealing the goggles. Some right hands don’t get Grandmaster very far as X-Pac kicks him in the face. A double clothesline works a bit better and the hot (?) tag brings in Blackman. Everything breaks down and Albert pulls Grandmaster to the floor, leaving Blackman to take a double superkick for the pin at 2:45. It’s nothing to see of course but this was a perfectly nice tag match that did its job just fine.

The opening video is still one of the strangest things I’ve ever seen, with a bunch of clips of people watching Wrestlemania over the years, including a man in a barn with a trumpet, a farm couple outside their house, a man carrying hay, an Asian man on the streets of what appears to be a city in China, two teenagers watching through a TV store window, a twenty something couple in the backseat of a car and a clown. This is interspersed with what appears to be some kind of nuns dancing in a field. The one thing I always wonder: how do you get pay per view on these portable TVs with no apparent cables coming into them?

The stadium looks incredible with the wide shots showing just how massive the whole thing is. There’s something so cool about those visuals where you can see the tens of thousands of people. It’s the first stadium show since….geez 1992?

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Jericho, with a bad shoulder, is defending and has been tormenting Commissioner Regal for weeks due to Regal being an insufferable bore. This includes relieving himself in Regal’s teapot and dressing up like Doink for reasons that still aren’t clear (I’m sure Shawn Michaels is still mad about it too.). Regal responded by torturing Jericho with a series of handicap matches, setting up this showdown for revenge and the title. Notice that I can snap off those details without even seeing the highlight video while I could barely tell you how the main events of the last five Wrestlemanias were set up.

Jericho starts fast with a clothesline and spinwheel kick to send Regal outside as Heyman is in full on analysis mode. You can tell how excited he is to be here. Back in and a top rope back elbow gives Jericho two but Regal forearms his way out of the Walls attempt. Jericho’s bad shoulder goes into the post twice in a row and it’s time for some British limb punishment. An elbow to the face gives Jericho a breather but the Lionsault hits knees. The turnbuckle pad comes off and Regal sends the shoulder into the exposed steel so Jericho kicks him in the head.

A middle rope dropkick gets two but Regal goes right back to the shoulder. In something rather un-Regal, he takes Jericho up top for a butterfly superplex and another near fall. The Regal Stretch goes on until Jericho makes a rope. Right handed chops work a bit better for Jericho but a kick to the arm cuts him off again. The bulldog takes Regal down and the Lionsault out of nowhere retains the title at 7:08.

Rating: B-. This would have been a Kickoff match today so it’s a nice relief to have it actually get some attention rather than being background noise while the announcers previewed the more important stuff. These two beat the heck out of each other with Regal doing vile things to the shoulder. The ending came very suddenly but we got good stuff until we got there.

Shane McMahon arrives in the WCW-1 limo.

The APA and Jackie want to know where Tazz is, sending Bradshaw into an awesome speech about how important it is to be in the Astrodome because of all the sports traditions in the building and IT’S WRESTLEMANIA. I’ve always really liked this one.

APA/Tazz vs. Right to Censor

It’s Val Venis/Goodfather/Bull Buchanan for the RTC here and Tazz’s entrance cuts off Steven Richards’ rant. It’s a brawl to start with Jackie DDTing Richards until Tazz and Buchanan get things going. A big boot drops Tazz and it’s Venis coming in for two off a Russian legsweep. Goodfather gets a chance as well and whips Tazz into the ropes so hard that Tazz can’t even turn around in time.

The former Ho Train sets up a slow motion Vader Bomb with Tazz moving without much effort. It’s off to Bradshaw for a backdrop that barely gets Goodfather over and a better fall away slam to Venis. Everything breaks down and it’s the double spinebuster to Buchanan. A top rope belly to back superplex (with the cool looking ceiling making for an awesome visual) drops Venis, leaving Goodfather to miss the Ho Train so the Clothesline From Bradshaw can finish at 3:55.

Rating: D+. And that’s the worst match on the card. This could have been on Raw but it was a quick way to get the Texans on the card, which is hardly a bad idea. There was no reason for this to be any longer or any more evenly matches and for something like this, that’s all it needed to be. Sometimes you need a fun match instead of a long struggle and that’s what they had here.

Trish Stratus (currently Vince’s mistress) wheels in the catatonic Linda McMahon) but gets yelled at by Stephanie (in a much more compassionate way) for being late. Also, Trish needs to crack the ice for the champagne by hand.

Hardcore Title: Raven vs. Big Show vs. Kane

Raven, with a shopping cart full of toys, is defending so Heyman has some advice for him: “Run like h***.” Big Show comes out late so Raven this Kane with a plastic sign to no effect. Show (in his bad looking singlet phase) finally comes out so Kane throws Raven at him and comes off the top to the floor with the clothesline for two. They waste no time in fighting into the crowd and take their sweet time getting up to the stage (mainly because they’re in a freaking stadium) with Raven popping back up, only to be thrown partially through a wooden wall.

Show slams Kane onto a pile of wooden pallets and chases Raven into a caged storage area. The door is locked so Kane breaks it open and hits Show in the back with a broom. Raven chokes Kane with a garden hose but gets driven through the chain link wall. Kane isn’t finished and throws Raven through a glass window for a scary crash.

Not to be outdone, Show throws Kane through a regular door….so Kane shoves him through a wall. Raven pops in and grabs a golf cart, with Show jumping on the back for a crash (which according to Raven nearly knocked out the power to the entire building). Kane steals another golf cart and the referee hitches a ride, with Raven nearly being run over. This was supposed to start off some kind of a chase but for some reason it didn’t happen, probably time. Or Raven making the story up because he’s goofy like that.

They fight down the hallway and Raven goes through the drink table. That’s enough backstage as they head up some steps to the stage, with Kane winning a slugout with Show. A clothesline takes Kane down and Show gorilla presses Raven but they both get kicked off the stage and through part of the set. Kane drops an elbow/leg to pin Show for the title at 9:18.

Rating: C+. Completely different kind of match of course but I had a good time with it because they went with the full on goofy style instead of trying anything serious. The Hardcore Title was WAY past its usefulness at this point but at least they had some fun here. It didn’t need to be on the show, but would you rather watch another battle of the giants?

Kurt Angle obsessively watches footage of Chris Benoit making him tap out. Edge and Christian come in and say it’s going to be a big night for all three of them, though Angle only talks about how he didn’t officially tap.

Jimmy Snuka is at WWF New York. Cool enough.

An Australian fan is here. This was before the international feel really became a thing for Wrestlemania so this was a little different.

Rock arrives, forty minutes into the show. Are we really supposed to believe that people are just getting here after three matches? This has always bugged me for one reason or another.

European Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Test

Eddie is challenging and has Perry Saturn, in a big fuzzy hat, with him. Test starts with a layout powerbomb for an early two and a gorilla press drop sends Eddie face first onto the top turnbuckle. Eddie catches him on top but a super hurricanrana attempt is easily blocked with a simple grab of the rope. A top rope back elbow to the jaw (must be a Canadian thing) rocks Eddie but Test misses a charge….and gets his boot caught in the rope like a goon.

Thankfully Eddie is smart enough to distract the referee so Saturn can get in some right hands so Test doesn’t look incredibly stupid. The leg gets undone (with Eddie’s help) and Eddie starts in on the knee as he should be doing. With Heyman getting in the still annoying lines of “they’re the same size on the mat”, Eddie grabs a sleeper but gets taken down with a tilt-a-whirl slam. A tilt-a-whirl powerbomb gets two but Eddie kicks him low, allowing Saturn to come in with the Moss Covered Three Handled Family Credenza.

JR: “HEY REF! THERE’S A THIRD MAN IN THE RING!” There has been a third man in the ring for the whole match Jim. Saturn was the fourth. Anyway, Eddie has to roll through the frog splash and gets caught with the pumphandle powerslam. That’s good for two after Test dispatches Saturn, followed by a big boot that so clearly misses Saturn that you can hear the fans’ non-reaction. Another big boot drops Eddie so Dean Malenko can run in for the save (seemed like he missed his spot, possibly because the aisle is so long). Test goes after him and it’s a belt shot to give Eddie the pin and the title at 8:03.

Rating: C-. Another match that could have been on Raw but was perfectly watchable for the most part. Eddie getting the title makes a lot more sense as Test wasn’t exactly a thrilling choice, though they took care of him a bit with all the interference that it took to get the title off of him. Not a good match or anything, but it’s not like it was anything atrocious.

Mick Foley promises to call the Vince vs. Shane street fight right down the line. Right here in Houston, Texas!

Austin arrives.

Ok so for those of you unfamiliar with this show, it might not have seemed great so far. The real show starts now.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

This has kind of an infamous build as they’re fighting because neither of them had anything else to do, as mentioned on Raw. In other words, “go out there and do your awesome stuff”. Angle insults the fans on the way to the ring, insisting that he has NEVER tapped out to Benoit. Oh and adults wearing cowboy hats look stupid. Amen brother. Heyman: “This is as excited as a man can get with his clothes on.” Thankfully the match starts so I can get that image out of my head.

Angle takes him down to start but Benoit gets on top before rolling away for a standoff, much to the fans’ appreciation. They go to the mat again with Angle trying to get to the leg but rolling into the ropes instead. The threat of a Crossface sends Angle bailing to the floor as it’s an even match so far. Back in and Angle takes him down again but the Crossface sends him straight back to the rope.

That’s enough for Angle, who forearms Benoit in the face and it’s time for a fight on the floor. Makes sense and that’s a great way to make Benoit look awesome. A very hard whip sends Benoit into the steps and a suplex gets two back inside. Since he’s rather good at analysis, Heyman points out that Angle is now cool with a pin instead of a submission, which is a bit of a concession to Benoit.

Angle snaps off some overhead belly to belly suplexes but eats a clothesline as JR and Heyman argue over the best amateur wrestlers ever. A snap suplex gives Benoit two and a superplex gets a delayed version of the same. You know Benoit can’t just two suplexes so we hit the rolling German suplexes, only to have the third reversed into the ankle lock (BIG reaction for that). Benoit reverses that into an ankle lock of his own so Angle kicks him in the head.

Now the Crossface goes on but Angle rolls into his own Crossface. After a foot on the rope is good for the save, Benoit grabs his own Crossface to make Angle tap but there’s no one to see it. The Angle Slam gets two and Kurt can’t believe it. Angle’s moonsault hits knees so Benoit connects with the Swan Dive for two more. You can feel the energy from the crowd on these near falls. Back up and Angle gets in a low blow, setting up a rollup with tights to pin Benoit at 14:04.

Rating: B+. That would be the first show stealing classic of the night with a sweet story of Angle wanting to prove that he’s the better wrestler but resulting to cheating while still being able to brag about the win. That’s also the kind of ending that can keep a feud going, which I guess I can survive if I absolutely have to. Great match, yet somehow not even close to their best.

William Regal goes into his office and finds Kamala, rubbing a picture of Queen Elizabeth on his stomach. I think this speaks for itself.

Clip of the Wrestlemania pep rally in Fort Hood, with various wrestlers getting plaques (Lita looks completely miserable), though Angle would rather have a medal. There was a parade and the boss got a WWF chair.

Angle insists that he was the better man tonight. Benoit comes in to make him tap again.

We recap Chyna vs. Ivory. The Right to Censor wasn’t happy with Chyna posing for Playboy and tried to censor her, which included a spike piledriver to hurt Chyna’s neck. Chyna came back but got hurt again, only to come back again and come for the title here.

Women’s Title: Chyna vs. Ivory

Chyna is defending and fires off a pyro gun from the stage for a cool entrance. Ivory gets in a belt shot to knock Chyna down and rains down forearms but a kick to the ribs is blocked and that’s about it. The champ gets thrown across the ring like she’s nothing and Chyna unloads in the corner. Some hard clotheslines (JR: “I guess we could call that a Chyna Line. Or maybe not.”) and a powerbomb have Ivory out cold but Chyna pulls her up at two. A gorilla press drop finishes Ivory instead, giving Chyna the title at 2:38. That’s exactly what this should have been and nothing more. Chyna would leave the company before losing the title.

Trish ensures Vince that she has doubled up Linda’s medication and will only bring her down when Shane is at his most vulnerable. Michael Cole, still the annoying interviewer, comes in and asks about the shocking development of Shane buying WCW. Vince: “You want shocking? Tonight, you’ll get shocking.” That’s a guarantee.

We recap Vince vs. Shane and egads there’s a lot to this one. So Vince was having a public affair with Trish and said that he wanted to divorce Linda, who had a nervous breakdown as a result. Vince put her in an institution and had her heavily medicated, basically leaving her as a vegetable (make your own jokes). Shane came back to stand up for his mom but Vince had him beaten down, getting in a great line with “I will never ever forgive your mother for giving birth to you”.

A street fight was set up with former Commissioner Mick Foley (as fired by Vince) pulling out a contract that he signed before being fired saying that he could referee the match. Then Shane bought WCW on Monday, making this the first battle in what should have been a years long promotional war. Got all that?

Shane McMahon vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight as required with Mick Foley refereeing. Shane comes out first and introduces the WCW stars in the skybox (Lance Storm, Stacy Keibler, Shawn Stasiak and Chavo Guerrero are visual). Apparently they were scheduled to do a run-in during the match but Stasiak spoiled the plans in an interview so this is all you get of them. Stephanie in a Daddy’s Girl jumpsuit, is here with Vince.

A slap to Shane’s face gets us going, even though Foley didn’t call for the bell. Vince chokes in the corner but Shane nails a clothesline and something close to a spear. Some elbows to the back draw Stephanie in for the save, plus a slap to Shane. Shane is smart enough to baseball slide Vince and hammer away instead of going after her, plus nailing a few shots to the back with a KEEP OFF sign. A clothesline from the barricade has Vince in trouble and Stephanie begging him to get up.

Shane hits him in the back with a kendo stick and follows with the punches, which look a lot better when Shane isn’t middle aged. A monitor to Vince’s head knocks him silly and Shane loads up the elbow off the top. One great looking dive and a Stephanie pull later leaves Shane crashing in a good landing. That’s enough for Trish to wheel Linda down, just as Vince instructed. Trish helps Vince up and then slaps him in the face, triggering the catfight with Stephanie (with the fans eating this up with a spoon).

Foley tries to break it up (like a gentleman….I think) so Stephanie slaps him too. Trish chases Stephanie up the aisle, with Stephanie doing the most overblown fall I can remember, with her arms flying into the air before she starts going down. She can’t look natural no matter what she does. The two of them leave and we cut back to Vince getting up and calling Linda a b****. Foley breaks that up so Vince chairs him down and puts Linda in the ring, sitting her in a chair in the corner.

Vince isn’t done and throws Shane inside, followed by a bunch of garbage cans. Some can shots to the head have the still near dead Shane in even more trouble. Vince loads up another shot…..and Linda stands up. The place actually goes nuts and the fans are literally on their feet, which you almost never see in wrestling. Shane points behind Vince, who turns around and gets kicked low. Foley comes back in and unloads on Vince, setting up the debut of Coast to Coast to give Shane the pin at 14:23.

Rating: C+. I’ve seen this show literally 100 or so times and I still smile at Linda kicking Vince. This was about five stories all coming together in the soap opera story of the show. It works really, really well with Linda of all people getting a crazy reaction. When the McMahons are on their game, they’re some of the most entertaining people in wrestling and that was the case here. It’s nothing from a quality standpoint, but from a soap opera car crash perspective, this was a blast and incredibly fun.

Yesterday at Axxess (which is rather dark and looks like nothing you would see today), the Hardys talked about how their feud with the Dudleys and Edge and Christian has to end with TLC II because it’s the most dangerous match in wrestling.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Edge and Christian

The Dudleys are defending and it’s TLC II. I would recap the story, but it’s more or less “let them go nuts”. The entrances take some time and it’s a rare instance where you just know this is going to be incredible. Both sets of Boyz waste no time in jumping the Canadians as the fight is on in a hurry. Edge and Christian are sent outside, leaving the Hardys to take over with a double Poetry in Motion.

Not wanting to waste time, Edge and Christian bring in a ladder to drop everyone. Just to make it a little personal, they also stand on Matt’s crotch in the corner. Jeff gets drop toeholded face first into an open chair but it’s way too early for Edge to climb the ladder. A clothesline takes Matt off the ladder (which falls as well), leaving Jeff to dropkick Edge down as well. The Hardys set up a pair of ladders and drop Christian, setting up a legdrop/splash combination off said ladders for the first high spot.

The Dudleys come back in for What’s Up on Edge and let’s get some tables. Bubba powerbombs Jeff through Edge through a table and it’s time to set up four tables (two on top of two) outside. There’s no way that’s going to end well. Back in and Bubba SMACKS Matt in the head with a ladder, drawing a well deserved gasp from the crowd.

Three ladders are set up and all six climb, with Christian and Matt falling to one side (Christian just vanishes over the top and down onto the floor in an underrated bump), Jeff and D-Von falling to the other (and hitting the ropes) and Bubba and Edge knocking each other off to fall backwards. With all six down and one ladder left, here’s Spike Dudley (returning from injury) for a Dudley Dog to Edge off said ladder. Another one off the apron sends Christian through a table at ringside but here’s Rhyno (also taken out recently) to stop Jeff from going up.

Back to back Gores put Bubba and Matt down and Rhyno points Edge up a ladder. Now it’s Lita (Gored by Rhyno last week) coming in and “jerking Edge off” according to JR to bring him down from a ladder. There’s a hurricanrana to Rhyno and Spike chairs him into a ladder to knock Edge off. A Doomsday Device hits Rhyno and Lita cracks Spike in the head with a chair. Lita takes her top off but walks into the 3D, leaving Edge and Christian to chair the Dudleys down.

Edge sends Christian outside to get the big ladder, but you can’t have one of those with Jeff around. Jeff takes out Christian and climbs up the ladder (which is standing on the floor and equally as tall as the ones in the ring) for a huge Swanton onto Spike and Rhyno through a pair of tables. Well actually entirely through Spike as Rhyno was just grazed and his table didn’t even break. Edge brings the big ladder in and sets it up in front of three regular sized ladders.

Christian and D-Von go up the big one but Matt (“HERE WE GO!”) moves it from underneath them, leaving them hanging from the ring. They both fall so Jeff climbs up onto the regular ladders and tries to walk a tightrope to get to the titles but one of the ladders comes down. Instead he climbs a regular ladder and grabs the belt but Bubba takes the ladder away, leaving Edge to climb the big ladder for the highlight reel spear that made him look like even more of a star than he already did.

Two things about that spot: first of all, Jeff’s feet were caught in the ladder that Bubba moved so he swung forward into the spear to make it look even better. Second: a fan asked Edge if he was scared doing that in rehearsal. Edge: “YOU THINK WE DID THAT MORE THAN ONCE???”

As soon as we’re done with the replay, Rhyno shoves Bubba and Matt off the big ladder and through the four tables at ringside for the amazing crash. D-Von and Christian go up this time but Edge grabs D-Von and Rhyno gives Christian a boost to pull down the titles at 15:42. Edge and Christian clutching the titles and looking shell shocked is a great bonus.

Rating: A+. This was magnificent and it really does amaze me how structured they make this feel. They built things up over the course of this match with the fighting to start and then a few big spots, followed by the interference and then the sequence of show stealing spots (Jeff’s Swanton, the spear and the huge crash) to wrap it up. They managed to tell a story with what should just be a car crash match and that’s one of the most impressive things about this whole series. This is incredible and the best team ladder match ever, bar absolutely none.

Video on Axxess. This video was a big reason that I wanted to go to Wrestlemania, though this version looks WAY more fun than what you actually get, mainly due to the crazy long lines.

Heyman applauds TLC II. As he should.

Howard Finkel announces the new attendance record of 67,925.

Gimmick Battle Royal

Luke, Butch, Duke Droese, Iron Sheik, Earthquake, The Goon, Doink the Clown, Kamala, Kim Chee, Repo Man, Jim Cornette, Nikolai Volkoff, Michael Hayes, One Man Gang, Tugboat, Hillbilly Jim, Brother Love, Sgt. Slaughter

Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan are out for commentary, which is suddenly a lot sadder. If nothing else, it’s so satisfying to hear Heenan’s healthy voice before the cancer took away its greatness. This is one of the first nostalgia matches the company did n this kind of a stage and my goodness it still feels amazing. It also comes at the right time on the show as they needed to take a little breather after what we just saw.

Doink gets a nice reaction while Hillbilly Jim (who looks like he hasn’t aged a day) gets a VERY nice reaction, mainly because it’s such a fun gimmick. Hayes gets a big reaction, both from the fans and Heenan. Gang was supposed to be Akeem but couldn’t fit in the costume. Gene sounds like he has a nightmare about the Gooker, and yes we get the video of his debut. Repo Man is thrown out almost immediately and the Gooker is out second. Heenan: “This looks like a riot at Let’s Make A Deal!”

Tugboat is tossed as well and Kamala tosses Earthquake, who Gene almost calls by his real name. Kamala eliminates Kim Chee (what loyalty) and Luke is out next. Cornette is out (he and Love had agreed to stay in the corner and lightly hit each other but kept messing up and wound up injuring each other in mistakes straight out of the Three Stooges) and Droese follows him as you might be able to tell that this isn’t about the actual wrestling.

Goon and Volkoff go out next and Doink eliminates Butch. Kamala tosses Doink (and gets booed out of the building), with Hayes, Gang and Kamala going out as well. We’re down to Love, Sheik, Hillbilly and Slaughter but before I can even write those names, Sheik dumps Hillbilly to win at 3:05, mainly because he was too frail to be tossed out.

Rating: A. Consider the reason for the match and you’ll get why the rating makes sense. The match itself lasted just over three minutes while the entrances took 10:28. The entire point of this was to let these guys have one last entrance on the big stage and give the fans a nostalgia trip, which worked perfectly well. I had a good time here and it’s great way to let things lighten up a bit before we get to the last two matches.

Post match Slaughter comes in and gives Sheik the Cobra Clutch to stand tall one more time.

We recap Undertaker vs. HHH. After beating Austin two straight falls at No Way Out, HHH said he had beaten everyone there was to beat. Undertaker came out and said HHH had never beaten him. HHH jumped Undertaker and choked him with a chair (HHH: “You’re the guy that makes people famous. I’m already famous. I’m famous for crippling people.”) so Undertaker beat up his limo with a pipe.

HHH came back with a restraining order keeping Undertaker from Stephanie, so Undertaker had Kane kidnap Stephanie and threaten to throw her off a balcony until the match was made. Not yet done, HHH even destroyed Undertaker’s motorcycle with a sledgehammer. You can feel the hatred here and that’s the kind of video where WWE excels.

HHH vs. Undertaker

Motorhead plays HHH to the ring in one of the all time great entrances, especially with a wide shot of the entrance and a shadowed HHH stepping out and posing to show just how grand the stage really is. Undertaker rides the motorcycle down the long ramp with more speed than you’ll ever see on a wrestling show for a nowhere near as cool (yet still cool) visual. Oh and as a Network bonus: Rollin is still used as the theme rather than the bizarre times where they dub in the Ministry theme.

The fight is on in a hurry on the floor and HHH is knocked through the makeshift Spanish announcers’ table. They get in for the opening bell, with JR mentioning Undertaker being 8-0 at Wrestlemania. The fact that we weren’t even halfway to the first loss is really incredible and makes the already other worldly Streak all the more impressive. A big backdrop has HHH in trouble and a running clothesline in the corner rocks him again. There’s a running powerslam (which I don’t ever remember Undertaker using otherwise) but an elbow misses.

Old School (Is it Old School all the way back in 2001?) is broken up with a pull off the top, which is fair enough as Undertaker was just standing there. HHH elbows him in the back of the head and gets in another to the chest, setting up a neckbreaker for three straight two’s. The yelling at the referee lets Undertaker fire off the punches to the ribs but walks into the facebuster. The sledgehammer is brought in but the referee takes it away. Undertaker has to counter the Pedigree and the referee gets bumped in the corner.

A chokeslam gives HHH two and he’s not happy with the slow count, meaning it’s a beatdown on the referee. Well a kick and elbow drop to the back but for a referee that’s a heck of a beating. Undertaker throws HHH over the corner and takes it outside with HHH being backdropped over the barricade. They fight up to the technical area with Undertaker hammering away and tossing HHH up to a higher level.

HHH finds a chair though and destroys Undertaker with about nine shots about the head and knee. Too much posing takes too much time though and Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam off the tower for an awesome visual (I miss flashbulbs in wrestling). Undertaker isn’t done though as he climbs onto the barricade and drops a very big elbow onto HHH (revealing that he landed on a crash pad, taking away a lot of the impressiveness).

The medics get beaten up and they head back to the ring, where the referee is still down, about seven minutes after he was kicked and elbowed. Back in the ring and Undertaker grabs the sledgehammer but gets low blowed to save HHH’s life. Undertaker kicks the hammer out of HHH’s hands and the slugout is on. HHH tries a Tombstone but gets reversed into the real thing for no count, because the referee hasn’t moved in TEN MINUTES.

Undertaker finally goes over and shakes him before calling for the Last Ride. It’s not well placed though as HHH grabs the hammer and nails Undertaker in the head to counter….for two, in a great near fall (these two are great at those). Undertaker is busted open so HHH hammers away in the corner and it’s the Last Ride (I believe the debut of that counter so it’s not even a cliché yet) for the pin at 18:19.

Rating: A. Sweet goodness I love this match as they beat the heck out of each other because they wanted revenge. That’s how you do a match like this and there was nothing overly cowardly from HHH for a change. They were testing each other throughout the match and that made for a heck of a fight, which is all you could ask for. Well that and some better medical care for the referee. This one holds up very, very well and I like it better than their second Wrestlemania match at XXVII. Check this one out if you haven’t seen it in a long time, or even if you have because it’s that good.

And in case we haven’t had enough greatness on this show, there’s this left.

We recap Steve Austin vs. the Rock with the legendary My Way video. Austin was out for about a year with neck surgery and Rock became the biggest star in the world in his absence. Austin is back and won the Royal Rumble, with Rock winning the WWF Title the next month to set up the showdown of showdowns.

This turned into a game of oneupsmanship with the two of them using their own moves against each other and beating the heck out of each other over and over. You knew this was going to be special because the energy was right there in front of your eyes. The final exchange is perfect too. Rock: “You are going to get the absolute best of the Rock at Wrestlemania.” Austin: “I need to beat you Rock. I need it more than anything that you can ever imagine. There can be only one World Wrestling Federation Champion, and that will be Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin.” Do you need anything else?

Well you certainly didn’t need the ridiculous Debra involvement (Austin’s wife, who Vince had managing the Rock), which thankfully isn’t brought up or referenced in any significant way outside of the video because it was a bad idea that didn’t help anything. It would have dragged things down, and thankfully it’s just not here.

WWF World Title: Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Austin is challenging and it’s No DQ, announced just before the entrances. Austin’s entrance still gives me chills as it’s one of the best of all time as he’s reached a level of popularity in Texas (or anywhere for that matter) that is unmatched anywhere. Throw in JR’s incredible commentary (as only he could do) and a camera shot of Austin walking up to the second rope for the pose with all the flashbulbs going off and the camera zooming out to show all the people) and it’s hard to ever top. Rock….isn’t that popular here, but you had to know that was coming.

Austin’s “are you kidding me” look up at Rock as he poses is great and the fight is on as soon as Rock comes down. An early belt shot misses Rock so it’s the Thesz press and middle finger elbow as they start fast. Rock grabs a swinging neckbreaker but it’s too early for the Rock Bottom. The Stunner can’t hit for either of them so Austin throws him over the top rope as we’re not even a minute in yet. They head into the crowd with Rock getting the better of it and bringing it back to ringside. A clothesline takes Rock down but Austin has to adjust his knee brace.

The running crotch attack to the back gets two and a superplex keeps Rock in trouble. The turnbuckle pad is taken off but Rock nails a clothesline and they fight outside again. Austin gets sent into the ring bell but comes right back up with a bell shot for a knockdown. The bloody Rock is sent through the announcers’ table (a running theme tonight) and it’s back inside for more right hands. Rock’s comeback is booed so Austin gets in his own swinging neckbreaker to get the fans back, plus a two count as a bonus.

Stomping and choking in the corner has Rock in even more trouble but Austin stops to yell at the referee, allowing Rock to charge out of the corner with the hard clothesline. There’s a middle finger to Austin and he goes face first into the buckle. Instead of covering, Rock brings in the bell and clocks Austin (more booing) to bust him open for two. Right hands knock Austin outside but he drops Rock onto the barricade.

The catapult sends Rock into the post for that always awesome bump where he spins sideways. A monitor to the head gives Austin two but the Stunner is countered into the Sharpshooter for a Wrestlemania XIII callback. The hold is finally broken, though Austin comes up holding his knee. A rake to the eyes gets Austin out of a second attempt and he slaps on a Sharpshooter of his own.

Rock powers out as well so Austin puts it on again (makes sense) but a rope is grabbed. It’s not clear why Austin lets go, or why the referee makes him let go, but that’s been a problem for years. With nothing else working, Austin slaps on the Million Dollar Dream. Rock climbs the rope and flips back into a cradle for two, forcing the break in a callback to Survivor Series 1996. Rock’s Stunner drops Austin for a very delayed near fall…and here’s Vince McMahon.

Austin’s whip spinebuster gives him two more and frustration sets in even deeper. Rock gets a spinebuster of his own and there’s the People’s Elbow but Vince breaks up the cover. Shockingly enough Rock isn’t happy and chases the rather spry Vince, right into a Rock Bottom from Austin for two more. The ref gets bumped (not sure why it’s necessary in a No DQ match) and Austin hits Rock low. Austin tells Vince to bring in a chair and the boss gets in a shot to Rock’s head, with Vince throwing the referee in for the two count.

A quick Rock Bottom gets Rock a breather but he has to drag Vince inside instead of covering. Another Stunner gets another two so Vince hands him a chair for a heck of a shot to the head. That’s another two and the fans are cheering for the kickouts. Austin has had it and DESTROYS Rock with an insane sixteen straight chair shots for the pin and the title at 28:06 to a monster pop.

Post match Vince and Austin shake hands, officially ending the Attitude Era. Of note: Vince told Austin before the match that if he wasn’t feeling it, he could Stun Vince and they would figure it out the next day. That’s some incredible control to give a wrestler but Austin didn’t go with it. He did however say this was a bad idea in retrospect. Austin and Vince share a beer over Rock’s body and it’s one more belt shot to Rock to wrap things up as JR wants answers.

The long highlight package ends the show with My Way playing us out. Oh and one more thing. The song talks about how someone wants one more fight and then he’ll do things someone’s way. So, after three years, Vince could say to Austin that’s finally doing things…..“my way.” If that’s what they were going for, I need to buy a hat and take it off for them because that’s outstanding.

Overall Rating: A+. As Bradshaw said in his speech: “It’s Wrestlemania.” Throw in a XVII and you really don’t need to say much else about this show. There’s a reason it’s so revered, with the incredible combination of TLC II and Austin Rock II, somehow leaving instant classics like Benoit vs. Angle and Undertaker HHH as distant thirds and fourths. It’s pretty easily the best show ever with the energy off the charts, a can’t miss cards and the historic ending. I mean…it’s X7. I think that sums it up as well as anything else I can say so stop reading this and go watch it again.

Ratings Comparison

Chris Jericho vs. William Regal

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

2019 Redo: B-

Right to Censor vs. Tazz/A.P.A.

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: D+

Raven vs. Kane vs. Big Show

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Test

Original: C-

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

2019 Redo: C-

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: A-

2019 Redo: B+

Chyna vs. Ivory

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

2019 Redo: N/A

Vince McMahon vs. Shane McMahon

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: C+

2019 Redo: C+

Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Gimmick Battle Royal

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: A

2019 Redo: A

Undertaker vs. HHH

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

2019 Redo: A

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A++

2015 Redo: A+

2019 Redo: A+

I think I’m done with this one as the ratings are barely changing every time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/24/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-17-oh-yes/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/26/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xvii-the-greatest-show-of-all-time/

And the 2015 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xvii-2015-redo-see-the-previous-comment/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6