Royal Rumble 2004
Date: January 25, 2004
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,289
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

So another year has passed and the only real change is that Evolution is running wild on Raw. Yeah, HHH is champion again, Benoit is still having great matches but getting nowhere with them, Brock still owns the world, and the Dudleys are still the only tag team worth a thing. The levels of similarity between the two shows astounds me. Oh and Cena is now a face. Yeah that’s all I’ve got.

This really was a show that doesn’t mean much in the history of the company because nothing much happens. Shawn and HHH are going to have another classic in their endless series and Lesnar is having a match with Hardcore Holly of all people. Let that sink in for a bit before we start this up.

Naturally the opening video is about Shawn and HHH, because, you know, they’re more important than the match the show is named after. The whole thing is about roads which is fine but geez, could you be a bit more subtle next time? I didn’t really get what you were trying to talk about here.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Ric Flair/Batista

This is in the Evolution period so Flair thinks he’s a Horseman still I guess. It’s a tables match so at least we don’t have to worry about it lasting long. Evolution came in as champions here after having the belts stolen from them a month before. Oh and they’re 17 time champions here. They put Coach through a table on Raw in a pointless segment. Oh dang it they gave Batista a mic. Who thought this was a good idea at this point in his career?

The fight is on in the aisle, and I think Flair is on the verge of bleeding already. In a cool spot, Bubba is on one side of the ring and gets a table out. He slides it across the ring and it hits Batista on the floor on the other side of the ring. That was impressive. Seeing Dave with a lot of hair is just amusing. Flair is told to suck on that by Bubba which is an image I never want again. We go to a completely ranomd shot over the shoulders of the announcers. What the heck was the point of that?

The Dudleys hit that reverse neckbreaker that is always called a 3D by idiotic fans in the crowd. Shockingly, Flair is slammed off the top rope. Coach leaves for no apparent reason as Flair is about to get a 3D. He almost gets the What’s Up but Flair stops it. Batista puts D-Von through a table to end it. That was incredibly pointless.

Rating: C. It’s four and a half minutes long. How much of a rating could I actually give this thing? It was a way to give Evolution a bit more credibility as champions and that’s what it did. They lost them to RVD and Booker a few weeks later but whatever. This was fine for an opener I guess.

We go to the back and I have to take a break for a minute as Josh Matthews looks like a cross between Vanilla Ice and….something not meant to be crossed with Vanilla Ice. I mean it’s just hilarious. Anyway, he’s with Cena who is a face now but he still raps. RVD interrupts him in a bizarre cameo. Cena was getting there but he wasn’t quite there yet.

We see a chair that’s reserved for Foley. This is in the middle of the angle where he was afraid of Orton and refused to fight him.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Talk about two careers that have gone in completely opposite directions since this. Rey comes out first for no apparent reason. If Noble’s music was any more generic it would be off an American Idol winner’s CD. Oh yeah and Nidia, Noble’s girlfriend, has been blinded by Tajiri. It’s a fake, and if that surprises you I have to wonder why you’re here. Apparently Noble has been using her to help him win matches without her knowing about it.

Cole gets in the flat out stupid line of “Nidia looking on”. Cole, you are a plague upon mankind. Even Tazz calls him out for saying something stupid. How bad does that tell you he is? Nidia trips Noble “by mistake” and Rey gets a 619 and drops the dime for the win. Yeah that’s really all that happened. It’s a 3 minute match.

Rating: N/A. There’s more or less nothing here to grade so I can’t do it justice. The angle was stupid though and this is kind of insulting to the crusierweights. They give them 3 minutes for their title? Seriously, what’s the point in even having them out there? This was stupid and is a great example of why this division is considered a freaking joke.

So Chavo can’t stand Eddie because he’s jealous or something stupid like that.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

I put Jr. because Chavo Sr. is with Chavo here. This was right before Eddie turned into the mega face and would become the most overrated wrestler in recent history. Yes Eddie was great, but you would think he was the second coming of Lou Thesz based on how much praise he got all of a sudden. He’s mad over here but still it’s annoying considering they’re still using his name in angles now.

Now in case you didn’t know that they grew up more or less as brothers, they’re going to let you know for the first time in the first two minutes. That should only be mentioned about 15 more times in the match. Oh and apparently Chavo hates Eddie now. I get that we have faces vs. heels, but this pro-Eddie stuff from Cole here is driving me insane. SHUT UP ALREADY. WE GET IT. In a funny spot, Chavo does Eddie’s dance thing and Eddie just flips him off. That was great.

Oh Eddie refuses to punch too. Chavo Sr., who is Eddie’s brother in case you can’t remember the family tree in your head, trips him to give Chavo the advantage. Since Chavo pales in the shadows of Eddie though, that lasts all of a second. Chavo steals Eddie’s sequence of moves, so Eddie follows it up by doing the exact same sequence. This allows for the frog splash to end it. That was just pointless. Eddie follows it up with a long beatdown of both Chavos to fill in some time.

Rating: C+. The wrestling here was quite good, but I still don’t get what was accomplished here. Eddie was just treading water at this point until less than a week later when he was launched into being number one contender for the Smackdown Title in a battle royal. This ended this mini feud so I guess that’s the point it served. I never liked Eddie vs. Chavo for some reason, but the wrestling was very solid.

Buy Mick Foley’s Greatest Hits and Misses. No you really should as it’s a cool set.

Benoit is in the back with Josh Matthews but Flair and Evolution interrupt him. If anyone can explain to me logically why Benoit was never made into the next big star of the Horsemen in WCW, I’ll get you a ham sandwich. They talk about Benoit being unable to win the big one, which more or less gives away the ending to the Rumble.

Since apparently I murdered a baby in a past life or something, we recap Bob Holly vs. Lesnar. It’s an even numbered year so it’s time to push him again. Holly fought Lesnar in 2002 and Lesnar messed up a powerbomb and it broke Holly’s neck. That apparently is what it takes for him to get a title shot. Holly kept jumping Brock and trying to hurt him with a full nelson. Yes, Hardcore Holly is getting a title shot at the Royal freaking Rumble. Just take me now.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Hardcore Holly

They announce Holly and that this is for the WWE Title and I expect Chimmel to just break up laughing. I mean seriously how could you keep a straight face announcing that? It’s amazing to think that Lesnar would be done with the WWE in three months. Holly jumps him before the match starts so the bell rings while Holly is waiting on Brock to get up. He misses a cross body, meaning that he was in control for all of two seconds of this match.

After that, it’s all Brock. I mean literally, four minutes have passed and Holly has been on defense since then. Tazz and Cole are really trying to make this sound like a legit match. They even say that Holly might be pound for pound the strongest guy in the company. That’s just completely stupid. Hey there’s offense! It’s a head slap and two punches and he’s down again. Also most of this is Brock with Holly on the mat in a hold.

He gets a slightly longer one here, even hitting his finisher, the Alabama Slam (think of a guy going for a sunset flip but not getting over and the guy he’s using it on grabbing his legs and slamming him back down to the mat). Naturally though he doesn’t cover but goes for the stupid submission and since that doesn’t work, the F5 ends this in like 6 minutes.

Rating: D-. This was a squash on PPV for the title. I can get the idea of having a throwaway feud that ends at the Rumble to set up the real feud at Mania, but this was just a waste of time. Serious, HARDCORE HOLLY is the best you can do? You couldn’t throw someone like Cena in there for a quick feud and title match that went 12 minutes or so? Vince loved Holly for some reason and refused to quit pushing him until he finally woke up and fired him.

We’re four matches into a six match card. The longest match so far: Eddie vs. Chavo at eight minutes and three seconds. I know I complain about PPVs being too much like a TV show but this is ridiculous.

HHH and Shawn are getting ready for their title match tonight. Of course it’s seven years in the making despite them feuding extensively since then. Basically this time Shawn had gotten a title shot in his home town and pinned HHH, but his shoulders were down too so HHH kept the belt.

That’s a great match that you should check out which I believe is on the Heartbreak and Triumph DVD. They go through the usual whining about HHH taking Shawn’s spot after the injury and I want to beat myself with a rock. This highlight package literally goes on for almost four minutes. WE GET IT.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

This is last man standing. From the beginning of the recap package to the bell was about seven and a half minutes. Shawn is finally back to looking like a pro wrestler instead of looking like a tiny man that he was in the Elimination Chamber. What’s the deal with announcers always misusing the word literally? Monsoon said they were literally hanging from the rafters and Lawler says they’re literally beating the tar out of each other. No, not really.

Ross follows that up with a line saying that Michaels made a calculated mistake. I just shake my head and move on. In a shocking turn of events, HHH works on Shawn’s back. Lawler goes on a limb and says that Shawn’s back might be healed SIX YEARS AFTER HE HURT IT. I love how they try to make it sound like Shawn left and then HHH was a big deal the next day. In reality it took about a year for him to get to the big time and another year and the Rock before anyone took him seriously.

Shawn hooks on a figure four and Ross manages to plug the recently released Flair DVD. If anyone has ever been a better or more hardworking salesman than Vince McMahon, I want to meet them and buy something from them. We’re already seeing the problem that exists in every Last Man Standing match: the first fifteen minutes or so mean nothing.

You can go do something else while waiting on that part to end. There will be some decent spots, but it’s simply not going to end during that amount of time. We move to the let’s dodge each other’s finishers which is clichéd but fine I guess.

Shawn goes to the apron and tries a reverse springboard cross body to the floor but eats table in a good looking spot. Since it’s a big match, Shawn is bleeding. I know he emulates Flair but come on now. Hey let’s get a chair since we haven’t had enough violence so far. Naturally Shawn is up in time because we haven’t had the big face comeback yet. In case you can’t tell, I’m not thrilled by this match. It’s ok, but nothing great.

Shawn blocks a Pedigree and slingshots HHH in front of the turnbuckle so HHH can jump to hit the post. Shawn kills him with the chair for an eight or so. Both guys are bleeding. Shawn nips up and the fans are into this if nothing else. He initiates his ending sequence which is just like what Bret Hart would do even though he’s nothing like Bret Hart right?

For the life of me, if Shawn wants to hit a big kick, WHY DOES HE STOMP THE MAT WHILE THE OTHER GUY IS GETTING UP??? That’s just freaking STUPID. Oh come on now. After Shawn gets low blowed, he hooks a sleeper. While it’s psychologically a good move, it’s the best way possible to kill a crowd dead. This match has been 80% punching and chopping.

This match is going on, but all of the clichéd spots like the long double count are just getting annoying as all goodness. A Pedigree puts Shawn down again. He gets up and since he just took a big finisher he’s able to hit Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere, because you know, that’s perfectly reasonable. This leads to a double count out which gets booed out of the freaking building.

This caused Shawn to be completely ridiculous and consistently demand that he get a title shot and generally coming off like a total whiny little troll. This is why Shawn was in the Mania main event, and yes, I think it had a lot to do with HHH making sure that his buddy got to main event ANOTHER Mania and kept him from having to job to Benoit clean, but you’ve heard more than enough rants about that.

Rating: C+. This match felt like it was missing the middle part. It felt like 18 minutes of the feeling out process and then we shifted to the finish for about five minutes. The double count out thing I couldn’t stand but at least they had a plan for these two moving forward.

The problem though is that it’s just Shawn vs. HHH. This feud went on forever and while it’s a big match, it’s been done. That’s the thing: it’s just more of HHH only making his buddy look good instead of just allowing him to lay down for Benoit at Mania like he should have. It’s not bad, but once you think about it the match loses some luster.

We go to a long video package about the Rumble, mainly focusing on Benoit which completely gives away the winner. He’s number one and Goldberg is number 30. Yeah that’s about it.

Austin, Heyman and Bischoff get together. Hilarity ensues.

Brock and Goldberg look at each other. I think Goldberg wants to go get some coffee.

Royal Rumble

As mentioned, Benoit is first and Orton is number 2. Tazz and Ross are doing the commentary tonight and Orton is the IC Champion here. These two would headline Summerslam in about 7 months in a great match which led to Orton’s horribly botched face turn. GEEZ Orton looks different here as he more or less was all clean cut like some college kid. Compare that to what you see now and you’ll be amazed.

I’m not sure if I like this style of the Rumble. I like having bigger names in at the beginning, but they couldn’t have made it clearer that Benoit was winning if they put the WM 20 poster on the mat for this. I like these hard hitting people if nothing else. Henry is 3rd as I think the intervals are two minutes or so. Teddy Long is managing Henry here which means more or less nothing. After about a minute, Tajiri is 4th. I know this because there’s a graphic in the corner that says Tajiri 4th.

He and Benoit do some sweet looking technical stuff. Bradshaw is 5th and somehow he would be world champion in 6 months. He clotheslines everyone but Benoit who pulls him into a crossface. Bradshaw picks him up and tries to dump him but Benoit holds on and pulls Bradshaw out. Rhyno is 6th here as the intervals are actually staying pretty close to accurate here.

Tajiri puts Henry in the Tarantula but Rhyno gores Henry to knock Tajiri out. That’s actually pretty creative and I liked it. Benoit puts Henry out by just running into him a few times to a solid pop. It was bigger last year but we’re not going to speak of that. Oh Henry took some mist according to a replay to cause him to be in the Tarantula. Matt Hardy is seventh. We now have Benoit, Orton, Rhyno and Hardy in there. Hardy is a face here I think. Yeah he’s getting pops.

I just don’t think he means anything as a singles guy, which would date this show as sometime between 2001 and the present. The two successful singles guys and the two lesser so successful singles guys are together. In at eight is Scott Steiner who means more or less nothing at this point. He dominates for the most part with amazingly enough, more suplexes. In an amusing moment, Benoit is just like boy please and starts throwing Steiner around with them.

Ross points out something interesting by saying that no one in this Rumble has won before. Again, that’s the point of an announcer. Lines like that can do a lot as far as elevating a match. Number 9 is MATT FREAKING MORGAN! They know he’s awesome even here where he’s been around all of a few months. Even WWE bills him as 7’0 tall even though he’s about 6’8. He puts Benoit down with a huge power bomb though.

They refer to him as a rookie here so he hasn’t been around long. I know he came out of nowhere at SS 03 and then left around Mania before coming back as Carlito’s bodyguard. Hurricane is tenth. Morgan throws him out in a few seconds and he lands really badly on his leg and might be legit hurt. He almost puts out Hardy who makes a nice save.

Morgan just looks at him while he comes back in which just looks stupid. Booker is 11th and is apparently a favorite to win this? He has a bad rap version of his theme song. He and Steiner go at it and we get a WCW reference. Benoit and Morgan just sounds like a TNA dream match. Ross says that Benoit is still alive somehow. That’s a creepy line. Morgan has shrunk to 6’10 apparently but grows back to 6’11 before Kane is in at 12.

Steiner goes out off camera thanks to Booker. Morgan either has lifts in his shoes or something is weird about his height as he’s almost Kane’s size. They do a smart thing though and spin the camera angles a lot while they’re fighting though. As a recap, we have Benoit, Orton, Rhyno (who gores Hardy as I say that for his first noticeable anything in about 10 minutes), Hardy, Morgan, Booker and Kane.

Of those seven, three would be in TNA within four years. That’s either saying a lot or nothing at all and I’m not sure which. Kane is the only person up as the clock goes down to zero. The lights go out and a gong sounds. To say the crowd pops is an understatement. Kane had buried Taker alive (again) back at Survivor Series. Only in wrestling would that make perfect sense.

That had ended the biker gimmick as Taker would come back as the Dead Man at Mania to face Kane in a glorified squash match. Kane is distracted and Booker puts him out. Spike comes out as number 13 and never gets in the ring. You figure out why not. Rikishi is in at 14 after about a minute of waiting. Benoit puts out Rhyno as Rikishi gets in. Morgan gets a stink face as he must be counting the days to getting to TNA. Tazz mentions that Benoit is hanging in there, which sent a chill up my spine.

Less than 75 seconds later, Renee Dupree is number 15. He actually puts Matt Hardy out with relative ease. That’s surprising if nothing else. Rikishi puts him out a few seconds later. A-Train is in at 16 as he must be about gone from the company at this point. Yeah he would be gone in November after getting hurt in the summer. Benoit puts Morgan out. Orton puts out Booker and Rikishi in about 15 seconds. That’s not bad at all.

Benoit puts out A-Train just as Shelton gets in at number 17. A-Train goes over the ropes and to the floor, and Tazz says that he thinks A-Train is out and I shake my head. Orton puts out Shelton and we’re back to where we started out. Both are down as a guy in a fake afro comes out to introduce Ernest Miller at 18. This was one of the dumbest signings ever as Miller was barely over in WCW so he got hired here for no apparent reason.

Anyway, after dancing badly for a bit, Orton puts him out. In a very funny moment, Benoit tries to throw out Lamont, the guy that did the introduction but as he runs him to the ropes to throw him, just the hair goes off. It’s a lot better than it sounds. Angle is 19th to a HUGE pop. This is kind of a dream trip in there really. Naturally he and Benoit beat the tar out of each other.

Rico, now in his full gay stage, is 20th. Tazz sums him up in one line: you have to be as tough as Rico to wear those pants in the Royal Rumble. Rico was a guy that never got a fair shake as a wrestler. He was chained down by his gimmick and no one could ever take him seriously. If nothing else though, I’ve never heard a single bad thing about him and before and after wrestling he was a police officer in Nevada where he graduated at the top of his class both times.

Like him or not, that’s very impressive. Orton hits an RKO on him and puts him out. As Benoit and Angle beat even more tar out of each other, Test is 21st as no one cares. Main reason no one cares is he’s not here. Orton hits an RKO on Angle as we cut to the back where Test is out cold. Austin, who was sheriff or something like that at the time yells at someone we can’t see that they’re now number 21 as it was apparently the guys that did this to Test.

Austin sounds like Christian Bale from Dark Knight. It’s Mick Foley as the roof is completely gone after being blown off by his music. This was during an angle where Foley was afraid of Orton and refused to fight him on Raw back in December so he left the company. Ross says he knew Foley wasn’t a coward. The look on Orton’s face is absolutely perfect as he’s scared to death. Foley beats the living tar out of him and a Cactus Clothesline puts both of them out.

Foley beats on him even more on the floor as Christian is number 22. Oddly enough ECW is on at the moment and he’s in the main event (shocking isn’t it?). Orton is just getting killed by Foley this whole time. Scratch that he’s coming back with a SICK chair shot to Mick’s head. They fight up the entry way as they set up Rock and Foley vs. Evolution at Mania and the EPIC hardcore match at Backlash.

If you haven’t seen the Backlash match, go get Mick Foley’s Greatest Hits and Misses and check that match out. It’s a great DVD too. The final disc has four Foley matches on it where you can pick between original commentary or Foley and Joey Styles which is a cool idea. Nunzio is 23rd but he walks into Socko on the ramp. We haven’t seen anything in the ring for about a minute and a half at this point, but in this case it’s ok. The crowd is WAY into this.

Orton runs away and Foley staggers after him. Nunzio (Little Guido for you ECW fans) sits at ringside while everyone else fights in the ring. Tazz makes fun of Christian wearing pink tights. Ross says some great Canadians have worn pink tights which shuts Tazz up FAST. Big Show is in at 24. He’s finally back in normal looking tights which I couldn’t be happier about. Again, Ross says something very insightful: Yoko and Studd were both #24 when they won.

See, again, that’s something no one would ever pick up on and it offers something to think about. That’s the sign of a great announcer. Jericho is number 25. We have far too high of a Canadian to American ratio in there. Haas is in at 26th. Nunzio is still sitting outside. Jericho puts out Christian for the second year in a row apparently. Billy Gunn is 27th and is apparently returning.

Why in the world is he getting a pop? I just don’t get it. He gets a Fameasser on both Angle and Show which Ross points out is a bad idea because you have to have Show up to put him out. Ross stays on fire tonight by pointing out that number 27 has produced the most winners in history. Even Tazz says Ross is on a roll tonight.

Cena is number 28 to a solid pop. He would win his first title, the US, at Mania over Show who he’s feuding with at the moment. He puts Nunzio into the ring but gets jumped by the Italian and Show. Show slaps Nunzio on the back and Tazz says that’ll shake your ribs cheeks. Where in the world did that come from??? RVD is 29th and we know Goldberg is 30th. Cena hits the FU on Angle.

Your final grouping as Goldberg comes in: Benoit, Haas, Nunzio, Angle, Show, Jericho, Gunn, Cena, RVD and Goldberg. That’s a pretty sweet grouping when you think about it. Of the ten in there, you have four former world champions and three that would be champion in the future. That’s not bad at all. Goldberg destroys everyone in sight and throws out Haas. There goes Gunn. Nunzio is out. He sets to Jackhammer Big Show and here’s Brock to screw that up.

He nails Goldberg and then Angle throws him out during the stare down. If either guy was staying at Mania, that could have been EPIC. We’ve got six now. Show gets the Andre treatment which doesn’t work at all. Everyone keeps beating on him and then they realize they screwed up because he’s out cold and weighs 500lbs.

Ok, I get that he’s dead weight, but Angle has freakish strength and RVD holds a world record for a dead lift while doing the splits, yet five grown professional wrestlers can’t get him up? Show just goes insane and puts out Cena and RVD. Jericho shows his intelligence and gets the Walls of Jericho on Show. Show puts him out with one arm to just show off. The final three are Angle, Benoit and Show.

If nothing else they’ve saved the best guys for the ending. Angle hits an Angle Slam on Show which never stops being impressive. Benoit takes one that’s close to it but not quite. Show gets a chokeslam but Angle rolls through it into an ankle lock and Show taps again.

In an awesome looking sequence, Show is in the ankle lock and climbs up the ropes, then he kind of rolls forward over them to pull Angle out, because Angle couldn’t you know, LET GO OF HIS FREAKING LEG or something like that. Benoit rolls through a chokeslam with the most basic counter there is to it and continues his streak of being the only guy in history to consistently work on the right arm of an opponent.

Show taps again. That’s a nice bit of continuity there as all three submission guys manages to get him to tap but it means nothing. I like it though as it shows they’ve at least thought this out a bit. It’s so simply yet it ties the match together and shows that while Jericho and Angle are both great, they’re not as great as Benoit as only he gets rid of Show in the end. That’s a nice little touch and it works so well.

Show is in that thing for at least thirty seconds too so that has to hurt. Show breaks it with a similar counter to what Bradshaw did earlier. Benoit breaks the hour mark. Show, with his handlebar mustache, gets Benoit in a gorilla press but Benoit shifts into a chancers (DDT grip with the arm held also) to pull Show over the ropes and in a cool looking finish gets enough leverage to get him out.

That’s a perfect ending as Benoit didn’t use power or some contrived move. He did what he does best: got a hold on Show and used leverage to get him out. That’s textbook Benoit and it’s the only way he should have won this. The pop is great and for smarks everywhere, this was a perfect moment.

Rating: A. This was a great Rumble for multiple reasons. First of all, Benoit wasn’t focused on until the very end, which made it far less obvious that he was going to be the winner. He blended into the background, which helped him out a lot here. In the 92 Rumble where Flair more or less went wire to wire, he was the focus of the match. Here, Benoit was mentioned but it was far more casual. Second, the ending 6 or so were awesome.

There were a bunch of people there that could have won. Angle winning wouldn’t have surprised anyone I don’t think, and Show is always a legit contender in something like this. This match went very well and while it may not have been great, it was very fun. That’s the best way to describe it: fun.

Overall Rating: C+. The Rumble I the only thing here worth anything. Look back at the show and see what else you have. The tag title match is a squash, the Cruiserweight title match is 3 minutes long, Eddie vs. Chavo is ok at best, Hardcore Holly got a title shot, and Shawn and HHH had a decent but far from great match with a bad ending. Then you have a great Rumble. That’s not a lot to go on really.

The part that kills it for me is HHH and Shawn being the only other match longer than eight and a half minutes. Seriously, you couldn’t chop off 6 minutes of that and give three each to the first two matches? Overall, the show isn’t much at all, but the Rumble is great.

I won’t really recommend it as a lot of this stuff felt like it was from a 3 hour special or something. This wasn’t much, but the Benoit Rumble win is great stuff. You won’t find a better example of someone being launched into the main event than that right there. Definitely check that out, but other than that take a pass.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

The things you can do when you sit down to do a big jigsaw puzzle.

I know I’m a bit late on this but it wouldn’t be me if I actually did something on time for a change. The series has not exactly been well received and I can’t imagine I’m going to be all that different from the masses as this thing was, for the most part at least, the series was WWE showing off their unique brand of history again.

Episode One: It’s Time To Shake Things Up

So after WCW and ECW went under, WWE needed someone to give them competition. Since WWE was SO awesome, they decided it needed to be themselves. They also decided that they should just be called WWE, because there was no lawsuit or anything forcing them to do so. That second part is about all you need to show you that this is going to be WWE’s history and little more.

The gist of this one is that things needed to be changed so we had the Brand Split and a bunch of new wrestlers, most of whom were trying hard and being all great and awesome, but they needed one thing. That would be Ruthless Aggression, which is where we get to John Cena, who of course gets (and deserves) his own episode.

Episode Two: Enter John Cena!

If you ever needed a short and not all that great John Cena biography, you have it right here. The whole thing is little more than talking about how great Cena is, how he was ready to fail until the rapper gimmick saved his career (which it did) and then everything was awesome because Cena is that amazing.

Really, that’s about it on this one. We hear about one of Cena’s great matches, part of his character’s rather limited evolution, then he wins another big match, then he’s a bigger star, then it’s Wrestlemania XXIII and we’re done. There’s very little in the way of criticism or anything that made Cena such a big deal. It comes off as “he wasn’t good, then he was a rapper, then he was the face of the company”. Now stretch that out to fifty minutes, with a section about how dumb the spinner belt was.

Episode Three: Evolution

Then there’s this, and it’s by far and away the best show of the series. Believe it or not, HHH’s team gets the longest show out of five and this time around it’s actually earned. This is a full history of the team as we hear about how/why it was formed and the thought process of putting the whole thing together. I know it sounds as simple as HHH’s Four Horsemen but it’s a little more than that and makes for some interesting television.

This is where the extensive video library comes in and helps things out so much as there are so many little clips of things that help tell the story. You get things like Mark Jindrak being part of the team, a ton of backstage stuff, and some great clips of Ric Flair that show you how out of it he really was when the team was put together. I liked this one far better than anything else and it’s worth a look on its own if you’re a fan of the team.

Episode Four: The Next Big Thing

Did you know that Brock Lesnar is a freak of nature and one of the best athletes that wrestling has ever seen? If not, you can watch any given thirty second stretch of this and hear the same narrative over and over again. This one is straight out of the Cena style, with almost no substance and “Lesnar is awesome and could do anything he wanted because he’s that great.”

In other words, there’s nothing to this one and it comes off like the highlights of a Wikipedia article. It’s Lesnar running over someone, becoming a big star, and then hearing about how great he was at any sport he tried. There’s nothing about the more interesting stuff and nothing from Lesnar. It felt like they needed an episode on Lesnar and threw together whatever they could with this. Big waste of time here and something anyone who has ever seen Lesnar could put together in a hurry.

Episode Five: Civil War: Raw vs. Smackdown

Now we get to the big finale and the narrative that WWE remembers every November: the battle of the shows. There are two ways of looking at this and only one of them is interesting. You hear a good bit about the backstage rivalry between the shows with Smackdown being viewed as the far less important show but putting on WAY better shows. That was certainly the case for the wrestlers, but I have yet to see a fan who cared that much about which show they watched. Fans still saw it as WWE all over the place (because it was) and it made the rivalry pretty forced.

They veer off of the idea a good bit though and include a look at the rise of Eddie Guerrero and Randy Orton, which makes you feel like it could have been a LONG series with several episodes, as it’s not like those two couldn’t have been individual episodes of their own. Other people get some attention as well, as everyone knew they were all working to fix up WWE. In an episode about the Civil War.

Overall

This whole thing comes off as something that could be interesting if they put in the effort, but there was almost no effort to be seen. Instead, it’s “here’s the concept, here are three people/groups who were major players, and here’s a big catch all for the rest of the people”. You could EASILY make this a 10-12 part series with looks at all kinds of other concepts (and they did mention more coming later this year) but the big narrative was “and everyone was so happy because WWE is incredible”.

Other than a little here and there in the Evolution episode, there is nothing controversial, overly interesting, new for the most part, or anything that even hints at the idea of WWE being less than perfect. There could be an interesting look at this if you consider how bad some of the stuff in this era was, but you’re not getting that here. If you’re an Evolution fan check out that episode, but skip the rest of this as it’s as fluffy of a series as you’re going to see.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 25, 2004
Location: Veterans Auditorium, Des Moines, Iowa
Attendance: 4,550
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the show after Taboo Tuesday, where not very much happened. Randy Orton defeated Ric Flair in a bloody cage match and Shawn Michaels’ knee injury kept us from having a very good main event. The main story was Edge snapping and going full on heel yet still winning the Tag Team Titles with Chris Benoit. There might be a future for him with something like that. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Taboo Tuesday if you need a recap.

We open with the entire Eugene vs. Eric Bischoff match and the fallout with the haircut. This eats up a rather ridiculous eight minutes for a segment that was pretty funny, but nowhere near THAT funny.

Here’s Bischoff in the ring, wearing a hat that looks like he borrowed it from 1999 HHH. He talks about being brought in to make an impact but always having someone get in his way. After taking the hat off and revealing short, gray hair, Bischoff says he’s giving himself his first night off and the inmates are running the asylum. I love how the idea of NO GENERAL MANAGER sounds like the craziest thing in the world because the last two and a half years of General Managers are the entire history of Raw.

Here’s Evolution for a chat. HHH talks about how intoxicating the power was for the fans last week and decides that the three of them will be running the show. It’s not just because he’s the World Champion but because there is strength in numbers. There is no one back there who can do anything about it so tonight, we’ll start off with Ric Flair getting anything he wants. Flair gets right to the point and says he wants Randy Orton again tonight because Orton was lucky last week. Flair: “I’m still your legend, right champ?”

It’s a lot harder to stay the man than it is to be the man, and Orton isn’t even the man in the first place. HHH grants the request but here’s Orton to interrupt. If Flair is the legend, then Orton has shown that he really is the Legend Killer. We get a nice RKO chant as Orton talks about how Evolution isn’t getting to do what they want tonight just because they say they can.

Orton wants the title back, so HHH makes him a deal: Orton can have a title shot if he beats Flair again tonight. For some reason Orton looks annoyed before enthusiastically accepting. Orton says to be the man you have to beat the man, so he must be the man after winning last week. I’ve never seen Flair’s eyes bug out so much. HHH likes the idea and says if Orton wins, he can have his shot at Survivor Series. If he loses though, no more title shots as long as HHH is champion. Orton isn’t sure but agrees.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benjamin is defending after taking the title from Jericho at Taboo Tuesday. Shelton goes straight to the armbar to start but Jericho spins out and actually survives an amateur match. Back up and Shelton misses the Stinger Splash, sending him head first into the post for the not quite rookie mistake. Jericho follows him with a crossbody to the floor and we take a break.

We come back with Jericho bending Shelton over the knee as the setup for the Walls begins. Another missed charge lets Shelton take over (you would think Jericho would have learned) and a super hurricanrana takes Jericho down. The Dragon Whip (again, how do you not learn) gets two but Jericho sends him to the apron for the springboard dropkick.

Back in and the exploder is blocked so Shelton goes with a northern lights version for two instead. Shelton can’t get a small package so he goes with a middle rope sunset flip, which is reversed into a Walls attempt. That’s reversed as well, this time with Shelton spinning around and turning it into a bodyscissors for the pin to retain completely clean.

Rating: B-. I think I liked this one a little better than last night as Shelton turned it more into an athletic display, which is where he really shines. Pinning Jericho twice in two matches (not being able to say last night is getting annoying) means a lot for Shelton, who has already won a lot of big matches, but now he has something to go with it.

Post match Jericho shakes his hand and leaves, but here’s Christian to give Shelton the Unprettier and hold up the title.

Bischoff and Coach have a drink while watching the inmates run the asylum.

Evolution surrounds Christy Hemme outside the women’s locker room with Flair hitting on her. She has plans for the night but HHH won’t let her to into the locker room. Jericho bumps into them so Evolution corners him as well. If he ever wants that Intercontinental Title back, he better learn who is running things around here. Maven of all people and Chris Benoit come in, as do a bunch of midcarders, sending Evolution bailing. You can see Survivor Series from here, but…..Maven?

We recap Edge’s drive into insanity last night, starting with losing the poll, picking up the Tag Team Titles despite walking out on the match, and finishing with costing Shawn Michaels the World Title.

Jim Ross is in the ring to interview Edge via satellite. Edge says the title was his to win last night so he doesn’t need to justify his actions. He beat HHH in a tag match and then beat Shawn and Benoit the night before Taboo Tuesday and he’s tired of being taken for granted. Shawn has a bad knee but Edge missed a year due to a broken neck.

He fought through that, a broken hand, a groin injury and everything else, but then he came home to Toronto and got booed out of the building. Last week six percent changed his life again. If the people cared about him, he could have been there holding up the title, but he’ll be back when he’s ready.

Back in the ring, JR introduces someone who actually is here tonight: Shawn Michaels, fresh off knee surgery three days ago. JR says he doesn’t deserve to be in the ring with a Hall of Famer so he leaves Shawn alone. Shawn heard all those injuries that Edge listed off and if they had taken twenty years, it would make him quite tough.

Since they’ve been over the last six months though, it just makes Edge sound clumsy. He had a great time at Taboo Tuesday, like he does at every pay per view, but this one was different. There was an excitement in the back like he hasn’t seen since he’s been back. Maybe it was because they put the fans’ fingers on the pulse of the company to decide how things were going. The wrestlers do this because they love the roar of the crowd and the feeling of the adrenaline coursing through your body.

Coming into Taboo Tuesday, the fans knew that Shawn was hurt but they wanted to see Shawn vs. HHH one more time. After the match was over, the people were asking him why he would put himself through something like that. He has two kids and a wife but he did it because the fans voted for him.

Batista literally steps in front of Maven during an interview to make a match for himself. Maven cuts him off and a match is made. Batista: “You’ve got to be kidding.” Fair enough. Batista says it’s not worth his time so Maven slaps him in the face and runs off.

Maven vs. Batista

Maven goes right at Batista to start and is swatted away as he should be. A corner clothesline sets up a big boot to send Maven outside with Batista shrugging off some forearms. Back in and more forearms have some more effect with a running version even putting Batista down. Batista misses a charge in the corner but a missile dropkick is swatted away. The Batista Bomb is loaded up but Maven countered into a rollup for the fast pin.

Rating: D-. I said it when I watched it live all those years ago and I’ll say the same thing again now: MAVEN? The last time we saw him on Raw was two and a half months ago in a squash loss to Kane. He’s never won anything of note and he was in OVW about six months ago. Now he’s pinning someone that had Chris Jericho and Edge running scared at Summerslam. It didn’t make sense back then and it doesn’t now, but given how there is virtually no one to challenge HHH aside from Orton (who he’s already beaten), the show needs some fresh blood on the face side and Maven is as good as we’re getting at the moment.

Post match Batista goes after Maven again but Jericho and Benoit stop him on the ramp.

Rock the Vote rally video. Still a cool thing to see.

We look back at Snitsky Pillmanizing Kane’s throat at Taboo Tuesday.

Gene Snitsky vs. William Regal

Snitsky jumps Regal from behind and gets a BABY KILLER chant. The bell rings and it’s a clothesline into the pumphandle powerslam to finish Regal for the pin in less than thirty seconds.

Medics and Eugene come out to check on Regal but Snitsky says that’s nothing compared to what he did to Kane. That wasn’t his fault, but everything from now on will be. Again: best character on the show at the moment.

Trish Stratus mocks Lita for having a sparkle in his eye for Kane, even though she ruined his life too. But don’t worry because they have a big roster with a lot of careers for her to destroy. They can worry about that later though because for now, Lita needs to lose the rest of her pregnancy weight. Lita lunges at her and Victoria has to pull her off.

Smackdown Rebound, including part of the Tough Enough video. After three matches and less than ten minutes of televised wrestling, we have time to bring this back after a few weeks?

Flair gives Evolution a pep talk. Batista and HHH will make sure no one interferes.

Ric Flair vs. Randy Orton

No more title shots vs. Survivor Series title shot. They both have bandages on their head from the cage match. Orton throws him down to start and a running slam has Flair begging off in the corner. Some Flair chops don’t have any lasting impact and Orton hits a pair of backdrops. A clothesline puts Flair on the floor and there’s a suplex to make it even worse. Back in and the rights and lefts set up the Flair Flop but Orton misses a charge into the post.

We take a break and come back with Orton slamming him off the top. The high crossbody misses though and believe it or not, Orton comes up holding his knee. Flair goes after the leg with the cannonball and chop block and it’s already time for the Figure Four. The hold is turned over in pretty short order and, after a few moments, Flair lets go and holds his own knee.

Back up and Orton hits the third backdrop, followed by a dropkick with the knee holding coming after the landing. The RKO connects, with Flair nearly landing on his back, but here’s Batista for a distraction. Benoit, Jericho and Maven run in to take care of him but the distraction lets HHH chair Orton from behind to give Flair the pin.

Rating: C. Totally fine Flair match from this era with Orton beating him up until the pretty obvious ending. You never make stipulations like that and then expect things to go well for you. The cage match was better because they were allowed to be violent and beat on each other, but this match was more important. Granted this should have been more interesting due to Flair shaking Orton’s hand after the cage match, but that hasn’t been mentioned all night and is likely forgotten.

Post match Evolution tries to leave but most of the locker room surrounds him. Flair takes an RKO and it’s a beatdown from Maven, Benoit, Jericho and of course Orton with an RKO to end the show. I guess Orton forgot about losing his chances at the title already.

Overall Rating: D. So to recap: Bischoff leaves for a night and everything goes insane with HHH just declaring that Evolution is in charge and we now have the roster rebelling against Evolution. The bigger problem though is HHH still being out of challengers, as we’ve done Benoit, Shawn isn’t going to be around for a few months and Orton isn’t allowed to challenge for the title for the time being. I can’t picture Jericho getting a title shot anytime soon so for now, we’re just stuck waiting on someone new while HHH holds the title. I’m as thrilled as you are, and nothing seems likely to change for the next few months.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Cena gets a big celebration for his first title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Booker T./Rob Van Dam

Booker and Van Dam are defending and this is one fall to a finish. And yes, they really thought calling someone Garrison Cade (just a generic guy who got better later on) was going to get him over. Jindrak is an athletic freak who became a bigger deal in Mexico and La Resistance are Rob Conway and Rene Dupree. Unfortunately this match means we have to hear the AWFUL Booker T./Rob Van Dam remixed theme. Seriously.

Chris Jericho vs. Christian

Jericho starts fast and gets rather aggressive on the mat. A belly to back suplex drops Christian as Lawler is cheering for the evil Canadian. Christian gets backdropped to the floor in a big crash and you know the New York crowd is going to be behind Jericho here. Back in and the threat of the Walls send Christian into the ropes.

Tim White tells them that they have “six minutes fellows” so Jericho gets two off a northern lights suplex. The Lionsault hits knees though and Christian gets two off his reverse tornado DDT. Christian starts in on the knee and slaps on a Texas Cloverleaf to mix it up a bit.

Post match Trish slaps Jericho on purpose so Christian can lay him out. Trish and Christian leave together and kiss on the stage, giving us the eternally awesome evil Trish, who worked in a variety of ways.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Mick is in as well though and things speed up (not normally something you associate with Foley) until Batista drives him into the corner (which you do associate with Batista). A huge clothesline runs Foley over though and Orton whips him HARD into the steps. Back in and Orton grabs a camel clutch for a bit before the rest of the team gets in their shots. Foley does get a quickly broken up Claw on Batista for a hope spot, which is a great way to keep the crowd into things.

Rating: B+. I had a great time with this as it was an exceptional performance, albeit not exactly a great match. This was all about everyone looking great with Rock and Flair clearly having the time of their lives out there. Foley vs. Orton was the real story here and things would get even better the next month when they were on their own. This was a big part of making Orton though, which is where Foley shined like few others over the years. Great stuff here and a fine example of what happens when you have some amazing performers wanting to do their best.

Foley gets up and looks dejected but Rock applauds him.

Gene Okerlund presents the Hall of Fame Class of 2004:

Tito Santana (one of my all time favorites)

Big John Studd (represented by his son)

Harley Race (that man deserves his own Hall of fame)

Pete Rose (booed but said to be incredibly grateful for the honor)

Don Muraco (underrated)

Greg Valentine (big pop and looks the same as he did in 1983)

Junkyard Dog (represented by his daughter)

Billy Graham (probably the most copied wrestler of his era)

Sgt. Slaughter (the definition of a wrestling character)

Jesse Ventura (BIG pop and well deserved)

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie

Playboy Evening Gown match (and Smackdown vs. Raw) after Sable and Torrie posed together. They want to have the match in lingerie but Jackie says no so this actually has to take place. Jackie is stripped anyway so all four are in their underwear. I think you know how this is going to go and they hit all of the comedy spots that you would expect. That includes high crossbodies, Stacy doing the leg choke in the corner, sunset flips and the referee getting crushed. Oh and genital jokes from Cole and Tazz. Torrie rolls Jackie up for the pin at 2:32. This was exactly what four non-wrestlers in lingerie was going to be.

Video on international fans coming in for Wrestlemania.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Chavo Guerrero Jr. is defending and this is basically Tag Team Turmoil but with one person at a time. Guerrero is automatically tenth due to being champion and the rest are all randomly chosen. In an interesting move, all ten come out first with Ultimo Dragon tripping on the way in for a funny moment.

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

The fans think this match sucks as Lesnar FINALLY grabs a headlock five minutes in. They collide off a shoulder and stare each other down AGAIN, earning a “WE WANT FLAIR” chant. A double shoulder puts both guys down again and the fans are still livid. Goldberg finally grabs him by the throat into a gorilla press into a spinebuster, drawing an actual pop from the crowd.

The spear misses though and Goldberg crashes out to the floor so the fans think he sucks. Back in and Lesnar gets two off a suplex before grabbing a standing choke to keep things slow. Something happens in the crowd and they start chanting for Hogan (probably a look-a-like). Brock gets in another suplex and puts on another choke as the fans have just given up on even trying.

Another double collision puts both guys down again as this is somehow eleven minutes already. Goldberg makes his comeback with clotheslines and a neckbreaker followed by the spear for two. The F5 gets the same and Lesnar stops to jaw with Austin, setting up the spear and Jackhammer to end Brock at 13:43.

It got watchable near the end but they had already given up and taken the crowd completely out of it by that point. I was embarrassed here and that should never happen. Austin was completely innocent here by the way and was stuck in a hard place. Oh and one more thing: WWE IS GOING TO LET THEM DO IT AGAIN THIRTEEN YEARS LATER! FOR THE TITLE!

Fireworks go off outside.

The champs dance post match.

Edge is coming back after over a year on the shelf.

The haircut is STILL going after that package and Molly really is bald.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Undertaker vs. Kane

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

In the real moment of the show, Eddie Guerrero comes out to celebrate with Benoit in the big emotional ending as the confetti falls. This is really, really hard to watch now and makes the show that much more emotional.

A four minute highlight package takes us out.

This is the kind of show that was DYING for a pre-show to burn off two or three of the matches that no one cared about (Tag Team Title matches and the Cruiserweight Open would be great candidates) and let the rest of the show not feel so long. The show itself needed to be about three to three and a half hours long max instead of the four hours and thirty one minutes it clocks in at instead.

Ratings Comparison

John Cena vs. Big Show

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C

2017 Redo: D

Booker T./Rob Van Dam vs. La Resistance vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jidrak vs. Dudley Boyz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B-

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Original: A

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B+

Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

Original: F

2013 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

Cruiserweight Open

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: F

2013 Redo: E

2017 Redo: S (for SEQUEL)

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2017 Redo: D-

Molly Holly vs. Victoria

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A

Kane vs. Undertaker

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. Chris Benoit

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Oh I think we have the definitive rating here.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/27/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-20-where-it-all-begins-again-with-two-dead-guys/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/29/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xx-nearly-a-masterpiece/

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/01/27/kbs-reviews-now-available-in-paperback/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Cena sticks and moves to start but Show throws him to the floor with ease. Still mostly uneducated, Cena tries to come back in with a high cross body and gets powerslammed to teach him a lesson. Cole describes a headbutt from Show as being hit in the head with a typewriter. Are there a lot of reports of being hit in the head with typewriters and comparisons to headbutts from large wrestlers?

Raw Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Rob Van Dam/Booker T.

Bubba tries a little Flip Flop and Fly but gets kick in the face for his troubles. Van Dam adds one to D-Von and we settle down to Jindrak beating on Booker. Dupree tags himself in and La Resistance takes over with stomps and a bow and arrow from Conway. After far too long in the hold, Booker gets up and grabs a spinebuster, allowing the tag to Van Dam. House is quickly cleaned as everything breaks down. Cade breaks up 3D on Booker but Booker nails the scissors kick on Conway, followed by the Five Star to retain at 7:57.

We recap Christian vs. Chris Jericho. This was an awesome story as the two were tag partners who made a bet over who could “nail” Lita or Trish respectfully for $1 Canadian. Lita dropped out of the story pretty quickly but Jericho started to actually fall for Trish. She started to have feelings for Jericho too but Christian hated the fact that she was breaking up the team. Christian beat her up in an intergender match to teach Jericho (a full on good guy by now) a lesson. This started a feud between the two and the big showdown is at Wrestlemania.

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

The aggressive Jericho controls to start and backdrops Christian from the apron out to the floor in a unique spot. A springboard plancha puts Christian down but he comes right back with something like a belly to back suplex to send Chris out to the floor in a huge crash. A chinlock keeps Jericho down for a bit before they ram heads to keep him down even longer.

Jericho counters into the Walls though and holds on even as Christian crawls through the ropes to the floor. This brings Trish out to ringside as Christian plants Jericho with a DDT. Trish gets up on the apron so Christian drags her in. Jericho goes over to check on her and gets elbowed in the face by mistake, knocking Jericho into a rollup for the pin at 14:56.

Rating: B-. Fun match here but this was much more about the story than the action. This story worked really well all around and everyone comes out of it looking better, mainly because they took their time and let the story build instead of wedging it into a month and then doing one match followed by a gimmick rematch. It makes for a better story and the whole thing works.

Post match Jericho goes after Christian again but Trish holds him back, only to slap him into the Unprettier. Trish and Christian leave together and kiss on the stage. This gives us evil Trish which, in a word, worked.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Rating: B. This was great fun with Rock and Flair being the hams that only they can be. They knew they were in the big arena for the smart fans and they played right to them. The real star here though was Foley, who made Orton look like a star here, just as he was supposed to do. They would do that again the next month at Backlash in their big showdown where Foley put Orton over and made him look like a star. Orton would be World Champion in August and these two matches played a big role in getting him there.

Video on the Hall of Fame ceremony, which made its return after an eight year absence. The line of the night came from Bobby Heenan. After thanking everyone: “One thing is missing. I wish Monsoon was here.” That gets me every time.

The Class of 2004 is brought out for the audience and each gets an introduction: Bobby Heenan (playing to the crowd the entire way through), Tito Santana, Big John Studd (represented by his son), Harley Race (the fans start cheering before Gene can start talking), Pete Rose (celebrity induction and said to be incredibly humble and thankful for the honor), Don Muraco, Greg Valentine (much bigger reaction than I was expecting), Junkyard Dog (represented by his daughter), Billy Graham (loudest ovation of the group in a bit of a surprise), Sgt. Slaughter (USA chant) and Jesse Ventura.

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

Clips of fans coming from around the world to see Wrestlemania.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

This is a gauntlet match with Chavo Guerrero (with his father Chavo Sr.) defending and going in last at #10. Shannon Moore and Ultimo Dragon (a Japanese legend who trips twice during his entrance) start things off fast with some near falls until Shannon scores with a belly to back suplex. Dragon avoids a corkscrew moonsault press and grabs the Asai DDT (kind of a standing sliced bread #2) for the pin at 1:17.

Jamie Noble (a country redneck) is in at #3 and blasts Dragon from behind, only to take some rapid fire kicks to the chest. Noble comes right back with a guillotine choke for a submission at 2:15. Funaki comes in at #4 with a high cross body but Noble rolls through into a pin at 2:23. Nunzio (a stereotypical Italian) is in at #5 and lasts a bit better as the fans want their pizza. A quick rollup gets two on Noble and Nunzio gets the same off a middle rope dropkick.

This set up a showdown here with Austin as guest referee to try to hold things together. The problem is word leaked that both guys were leaving as soon as Wrestlemania was over and the fans all knew about it. This could go bad in a hurry, especially in the smarkiest of all smark strongholds.

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Another big shoulder apiece puts both guys down as we hit six minutes. Brock gets in the first strike with a kick to the ribs at just under seven minutes. A gorilla press into a spinebuster drops Lesnar but Goldberg misses a spear in the corner. The fans are all over Goldberg now as Brock hits two straight suplexes.

Off to a side choke from Brock to eat up time before they have the nerve to do a double clothesline. Goldberg comes back with more clotheslines and a neckbreaker, followed by a spear for two. Austin and Goldberg argue a bit and Brock grabs an F5 for two. Back up and Goldberg hits a big spear but is booed out of the building. The Jackhammer ends Lesnar at 13:48.

Lesnar throws up two middle fingers (which he later said were to Vince and not the fans) and gets Stunned. Austin throws Goldberg a beer, then throws him two more after he drops the first one. Goldberg is booed out of the building and takes a Stunner, followed by Austin consuming a lot of beer.

Wrestlemania XXI is in Los Angeles.

Fireworks go off from the roof of Madison Square Garden.

Vince McMahon comes out to thank the fans for making Wrestlemania what it is on behalf of everyone who has ever performed for him and his entire family. Nothing else said here but this was a very nice moment.

The champs dance a bit.

Edge is returning from his neck surgery soon.

Molly Holly is ready for her title shot.

Victoria is defending and this is title vs. hair. Feeling out process to start with Molly taking over in the corner, only to be sent out to the floor. Back in and a quick basement dropkick gets two on the champ and we hit a neck crank. A powerslam gets two for Victoria but Lawler keeps trying to talk about the evening gown match. Molly mostly powerbombs Victoria out of the corner for two but a quick backslide retains the title at 4:56.

Rating: C-. This needed more time as they were flying through the match because they only had five minutes instead of a realistic length. If only there was some other stuff they could have cut out from the show that meant absolutely nothing and just ate up parts of the show. These two were both very talented women and they could have a good match if they were given the chance.

After the long video, Molly is still being shaved and is completely bald. The fans are impressed.

Smackdown World Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Eddie is defending of course and rides out in a low rider truck. They hit the mat to start with Eddie hanging with Angle at first until Kurt grabs a headlock. A top wristlock goes well for Angle and he shoulders Eddie down for good measure. Back up and Eddie nails a hard shoulder of his own but is still feeling the effects of the arm work.

Angle is FURIOUS.

We recap Kane vs. Undertaker. Kane hated Undertaker for abandoning the dark side and becoming the biker so Kane helped Vince bury Undertaker alive at Survivor Series 2003. This brought back the Undertaker Kane wanted, but this Undertaker wanted revenge for being buried alive. People tend to do that at times.

Kane vs. Undertaker

Side note: so was that stuff with Bischoff sending Coach to find Undertaker just to set up the Heenan/Okerlund bit? Sounds like a bit of overkill.

Backlash ad.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit vs. HHH

The champ gets rolled with some Germans but Shawn crotches Benoit on top. Sweet Chin Music misses the champ and Shawn gets caught in a DDT. That earns HHH a Crossface until Shawn makes the save. Shawn actually tries a German on Benoit and the fans ROAR when Benoit reverses into a trio of them. The Swan Dive gets two on Shawn and all three are down. Benoit is knocked to the floor so we can get the Shawn vs. HHH quota out of the way. Sweet Chin Music is good for two with Benoit making a last second save.

The Vince dark room video and part of his speech take us to the highlight package.

Ratings Comparison

John Cena vs. Big Show

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C-

Booker T/Rob Van Dam vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Dudley Boys vs. La Resistance

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B-

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Original: A

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie

Original: F

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Cruiserweight Open

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: F

2013 Redo: E

2015 Redo: F

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

Undertaker vs. Kane

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

Chris Benoit vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

2015 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: A-

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/27/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-20-where-it-all-begins-again-with-two-dead-guys/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/29/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xx-nearly-a-masterpiece/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Rating: C. Slow match but this was a good choice for an opener. The fans were WAY into Cena as he was rapidly becoming the hottest thing in the company (until the rise of Batista of course). The FU was a great visual to open things up as fans are always going to react to freakish displays of strength like that. Good opener here and the fans are hotter than they already were, which is the right idea.

Coach is in the back talking to various people before going in to see Eric Bischoff. Eric sends him to find Undertaker.

Raw Tag Titles: La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Booker T/Rob Van Dam

Trish agreed to just be friends but Christian started hitting on her. Bischoff made Christian vs. Trish with Christian agreeing to lay down for her. Christian decided to show some tough love by putting her in the Walls of Jericho, setting up Christian vs. Jericho tonight with Jericho fighting for the honor of his love. This is one of my favorite feuds.

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho charges into an elbow into the corner and gets taken down by a reverse tornado DDT for two. The reverse DDT into a backbreaker puts Jericho down again but Christian goes up and gets crotched. He blocks a superplex though and hits a top rope cross body, only for Jericho to roll through for two. This is solid stuff so far. Christian kicks Jericho in his injured knee and puts on the old school Texas Cloverleaf. In an impressive counter, Jericho gets underneath Christian and rolls through into the Walls but AGAIN Christian makes the ropes.

Jericho takes it to the floor and puts on the Walls out there before having to break the count. Back in and a butterfly superplex gets a VERY close two on Christian as Trish comes bouncing down the aisle. An inverted DDT puts Chris down for two and Christian spots Trish. He drags her into the ring but Jericho makes the save. Not being able to see though, Trish blasts Jericho in the face, allowing Christian to hook a quick rollup for the pin.

Post match Trish apologizes to Jericho before slapping him, turning into EVIL Trish. Christian lays out Jericho and leaves with the girl. Evil Trish was SMOKING hot and we would get to see a lot more of her as this feud continued for months.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Foley wants to come in to face Orton but Randy immediately bails to the floor to great heat. We finally get inside for the fight that people want to see as Foley pounds away and puts Orton in the Tree of Woe. Off to Rock who punches Orton in the “stomach” before clotheslining him down for no cover. Ric gets clipped in the back of the head by Flair which draws him into the corner, sending the fight to the floor. Batista drops Rock face first onto the barricade to take over.

We get some clips from the Hall of Fame induction ceremony last night which is the first class inducted in eight years. Heenan wishing Monsoon was there still makes me smile.

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

We hear from some fans who are excited to be here.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Chavo Guerrero, Ultimo Dragon, Shannon Moore, Akio, Tajiri, Jamie Noble, Funaki, Rey Mysterio, Billy Kidman, Nunzio

Jamie Noble is in next and after avoiding a moonsault, he hooks a neckbreaker and a guillotine choke to put Dragon out. Funaki comes in and gets small packaged for the pin less in about three seconds. Nunzio is in and takes Noble to the mat in a hurry before being sent out to the floor. Noble hits a sweet flip dive off the top to the floor and rams Nunzio into the apron for a countout. Billy Kidman is in next but Nunzio trips him up. Noble heads to the floor as Kidman slides back inside for a Shooting Star off the top to take both guys out.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

The catch here is that both guys are leaving and the fans know it, so they boo them both out of the building. Goldie gets his full entrance from the back. The fans IMMEDIATELY start chanting YOU SOLD OUT at Lesnar who is going to the NFL after this match. They circle each other and Austin says get to it. Now the fans sing the GOODBYE song with the guys still making zero contact over a minute in. The fans chant for the referee as Goldberg looks at Austin. Still no contact. After nearly THREE MINUTES of circling each other they lock up.

Post match Brock flips off Austin and gets Stunned for his efforts. Goldberg has a beer and gets Stunned for good measure.

Wrestlemania 21 is in Los Angeles.

Edge is returning soon.

Victoria is defending and Molly has her hair on the line. The champion has the awesome All The Things She Said as her theme song as is looking sweet in white here. They lock up to start and Molly pounds her down before whipping Victoria into the corner. Victoria nips up off the mat and sends Molly to the floor but loses control soon thereafter. Back in again as the match is already going slowly.

We recap Eddie vs. Angle. Eddie, as a former drug addict, has no business being champion according to Kurt. Guerrero is also in WAY over his head because of how good Angle is. Heyman, the Smackdown GM, hates Eddie for no apparent reason on top of that.

Post video, Molly is VERY bald.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero

Back in and Eddie takes him down with an armdrag but Angle takes control again with a sweet amateur move into a front facelock. Eddie comes out of it with a series of armdrags into an armbar as the fans applaud again. Guerrero switches over to a keylock but Angle shoves him off and drives a knee into the ribs to take over. Like any good ring general, he follows up on an injured body part with an abdominal stretch.

Rating: A. Great match here with the psychology flowing freely. Eddie was BRILLIANT out there as he had finally took it away from the wrestling game and got Angle out of his comfort zone. The dueling rolling suplexes were a great touch too as neither guy could hit them but it was a battle to try. Great match and well worth checking out.

Kane vs. Undertaker

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

The high knee takes Shawn down for two and a less high knee puts Benoit on the floor. Benoit has his back rammed into the barricade but Shawn baseball slides both of them onto the concrete. That is followed up by a big moonsault to the floor to take out all three guys and wow the crowd a bit. Shawn and HHH go back inside but Benoit has to come in with a clothesline to break up a Pedigree. Shawn goes shoulder first into the post at the hands of the Canadian but HHH ties Benoit up in the Tree of Woe.

Eddie comes out to celebrate with his friend as confetti falls to end the show.

Ratings Comparison

John Cena vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: C

Booker T/Rob Van Dam vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Dudley Boys vs. La Resistance

Original: D

Redo: D

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

Redo: B

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Original: A

Redo: B

Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie

Original: F

Redo: N/A

Cruiserweight Open

Original: D+

Redo: D

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: F

Redo: E

Original: D

Redo: D

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A

Redo: A

Undertaker vs. Kane

Original: D

Redo: D+

Chris Benoit vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: B

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/27/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-20-where-it-all-begins-again-with-two-dead-guys/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania 20
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 20,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz
Star Spangled Banner: Harlem Boys Choir

This just feels right. Wrestlemania is supposed to be at MSG. This show is considered to be the show where the new generation took control as Cena debuted, Eddie was defending a title, and Benoit challenged for a title. Sadly, two of them are gone now so those plans have been completely derailed.

This show is the first of the modern HOF induction shows as well as having the first smaller arena show in four years. I’m split on that actually. The smaller shows are better in the sense that it’s more personalized and there simply isn’t a place better than MSG, but the stadiums show off the spectacle more. Really depends on what you like. Anyway, let’s get to it.

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful and we go into the opening video. This is definitely the biggest show of all time with major matches and us at Madison Square Garden. The main event is Benoit vs. Shawn vs. HHH which has the problem of Shawn. There is zero point to having him in there but he’s there so that HHH doesn’t have to job to Benoit clean. Whatever I guess.

To end the video we see Vince, Shane and Vince’s grandson, which I believe is the first time Vince’s grandchildren have appeared on WWE programming.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Cena is the rapper at this point and hasn’t really gotten established at all at this point. He had been around a little under two years at this point and had turned mega face. You could see that he had what it took back then but he was being paced along very well. Show is champion coming into this. He was more or less worthless (yeah a stretch I know) as champion here so the ending wasn’t really in doubt.

John does his represent thing before the match starts. Dang you could see the star just trying to break out in him. He does a quick rap about Show and says Show is a gorilla. Cena’s hand is taped up so maybe he’s hurt or something. This isn’t really funny or anything but it gets the crowd going which is the point. Granted it’s a New York crowd so it’s not like it takes much work overall.

The title literally looks like a toy on Show’s shoulder. This is serious Show who has been motivated/focused lately which means he’ll lose a big match soon. Cena tries to get around the power to start which doesn’t really work at all. He gets sent to the floor and needs to rethink his strategy. Show allegedly retired Hogan in this building. Which retirement was that?

A cross body off the top by Cena of course fails as it always has against Show. Cena gets the powerslam that he deserves for being an idiot like that. He hammers away which gets him nowhere other than clotheslined down with ease. They have the picture of the current match on the opposite side from the cameras which is a cool thing to see.

Show suplexes Cena and he goes flying which makes John look like a toy. I know you hear that a lot but it’s true here. Headbutt puts Cena down and Show stands on his back. Cena hammers away but gets kicked in the face to end that. Show adds that standing legdrop that I think is called the Showstopper depending on who you listen to for two. The fans chant for Cena.

Cena tries a sleeper which is broken up rather quickly. This has more or less been all Show. Cobra Clutch by Show and Cena is in trouble. Naturally he just lets it go to put it right back on. Cena fights back with right hands and takes the knee out to send Show’s face into the buckle. FU gets two and Cena isn’t sure what to do now. Cena grabs the chain he brought with him but throws it down to distract the referee. The knuckles he carried with him also winds up going upside Show’s head and Cena has his first title.

Rating: C-. Basic big man vs. little man match here but at the same time, not much going on with it at all. Show dominated and Cena hit like three moves to take over and win the thing. That being said, the fans were into Cena which is the whole point. Not bad but kind of generic overall.

Coach is in the back and runs into some random people that aren’t important before saying hi to Teddy Long. He goes into Bischoff’s office to find he and Johnny Spade. Spade had just gotten a name change from Johnny Blaze. A few weeks later he was Johnny Nitro, and a few years later he was John Morrison. Didn’t realize he’d been there that long. Coach is told to go find the Undertaker, who was redebuting for the 58th time tonight.

Evolution minus HHH is in the back and Orton says he’s going to become a hardcore legend. As a former OVW Hardcore Champion, he’s well on his way. He never did that, but he got close a month later at Backlash. If you haven’t seen that match, go do so immediately. Well worth the 15 minutes it takes up. Anyway we see a clip of Orton hurting Foley back in June as this was almost a year long storyline. Oh and he’s IC Champion. The idea is that Foley is scared of Orton but has a backbone now. Oh and Rock is with him for a handicap match. That always helps.

Raw Tag Titles: Rob Van Dam/Booker T vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. La Resistance vs. Dudley Boys

Wow. You can see the division dying as we speak. The Dudleyz would more or less be gone in four months, save for the One Night Stand main event. We then have the one decent tag team on the brand at the time, and then two generic guys packaged as a “team”. RVD and Booker are your odd combination tag team. This is one fall to a finish. The remix of RVD and Booker’s songs was really quite bad.

Dupree vs. Van Dam to start us off here. Booker comes in quickly and gets a superkick to Renee for two. Bubba is tagged in. Why would you tag out here if it’s one fall to a finish? The Dudleys are faces for this week. The fans already want tables. At least they’re patient as they waited a full minute before starting that chant here.

Ross thinks Booker is a young man. That’s rather amusing. Bubba tries to do the suck on this deal and gets kicked in the face for his efforts. This is more or less RVD/Booker vs. the Dudleys with two other teams in the background. Jindrak gets two on Booker. It’s Garrison Cade at this point too. Who thought that would be a good name? I mean dude, Garrison Cade? Really?

Dupree comes in and La Resistance takes over for a bit. It’s Dupree/Conway in this form of La Resistance as that team changed every few months. No real reason given for why these teams are in here but does it really matter? The fans chant for USA while Conway, the American, is in there. Conway gets an elbow for two, which JR says was opportunistic. How? Isn’t that like doing his job?

Conway uses a bow and arrow hold for awhile to kill some time. Spinebuster gets Booker out of trouble. Wow Van Dam was in a good amount of worthless tag teams. RVD comes in and cleans house. The Five Star is blocked as D-Von shoves him off the top. Everything breaks down and it’s Booker (illegal) vs. D-Von (also illegal). 3D is broken up by Cade and then an axe kick sets up the Five Star on Conway for the champions to retain.

Rating: D. Totally boring match here that should have been on Raw. The division if you want to call it that was completely dead by this point and nothing was going to save it. The titles needed to be unified back then but wouldn’t be until 2010. Weak match that had no need to be on Mania in the slightest.

In the basement, the Coach hears noises coming from behind a door and opens it to find Gene Okerlund trying to get dressed. He tries to explain why he’s there and Bobby Heenan stumbles out half dressed as well. Coach says it’s not what you think. There was a poker game according to Heenan. Moolah and Mae pop out and drag the guys back in where frightening sounds are heard. One of my all time favorite segments.

We recap Christian vs. Jericho which was a great storyline. This started with Jericho and Christian betting a Canadian Dollar that Jericho could sleep with Trish before Christian could sleep with Lita. Trish found out about the bet and got all ticked off. Jericho fell for Trish and Christian tried to get his head back on straight. This led to Christian vs. Trish with Christian hurting Trish. Tonight is the grudge match. This was a great buildup and the video has me wanting to see the match years later. That’s a really good sign.

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

 

I guess Lita was just dropped from this after awhile for reasons unknown. They lock up for a bit and then Jericho is like screw it and takes Christian down with right hands. Clothesline takes him down again. Christian sends him to the apron but gets backdropped to the floor. All Jericho in the opening few minutes and we get a big Y2J chant.

Jericho hits that springboard cross body to the floor and then sends Christian into the barricade. Back in and Christian’s sunset flip attempt is countered into the Walls. They’re not applied though and Christian is able to get a thumb to the eye and then dump Jericho to the floor. Christian chokes away and talks trash to Jericho at the same time. He’s multi-tasking I guess.

Knee to the ribs by Christian as the fans are surprisingly quiet here. They don’t seem bored though and are instantly back into it when Christian hits a chinlock. I guess they’re interested here. Christian pulls some of Jericho’s hair out which gets him two. Ah the old hair attack. Haven’t seen that in years. Back to the chinlock but Jericho tries for the Walls again and again they don’t work.

Christian chokes away but Jericho fights back. Off to a neck crank for a second but Jericho is taken down by the hair as he tries to escape. Hey here’s another chinlock. Walls are attempted again and again fails. Spinwheel kick gets two on Jericho. Jericho gets a forearm and a knee to the back as he’s starting a comeback. Running enziguri gets two.

Rollup by both guys gets two and Christian’s had a handful of ropes. Northern Lights Suplex by Jericho gets two. Lionsault attempt winds up eating knees but the Unprettier can’t hit either. Reverse tornado DDT out of the corner gets two for Christian. They’re moving a lot more out there now. Backbreaker by Christian and he goes up. Jericho is slammed off and Christian hits a cross body which is rolled through for two by Jericho.

Christian throws on a Texas Cloverleaf and Jericho is in trouble. This is the first time they’ve had a bit of a break in a good while. Jericho breaks that and tries the Walls for the fourth time which doesn’t work either. He finally gets them on the fifth try but on the floor. As Christian tries to get back in he gets caught in a double underhook suplex off the top for two.

And here comes Trish. I’m pretty sure you know how this is going to end but she looks great in a tied off shirt so I can’t complain. Edgecution by Christian gets a long two. Christian drags Trish in and shoves her down. Trish “accidentally” nails Jericho and Christian gets a rollup and the win with it.

Rating: B. Decent match but it could have been a lot more. This was a match where the buildup was better than the match. The feud would continue for a good while though and it continued to be rather solid. Fun stuff here and pure popcorn soap opera stuff which is usually a good combination.

Post match Trish slaps Jericho, turning heel and leaves with Christian. The crowd is TICKED as Trish and Christian kiss to a big reaction as they leave.

Now we get to one of the more entertaining part of the show. Foley is talking about being nervous about having his first match in four years but Rock pops up and cuts him off. He talks about how there’s no reason to be nervous because everyone knows what’s coming. Hurricane and Rosey know it. Don Muraco and Jimmy Snuka know it.

But most importantly the people know it. Make sure you get a shot of the people. Rock says let’s go take care of Evolution, if you smell what the Rock (Foley: and Sock) IS COOKING! Funny promo.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Now this has an interesting backstory to it. Back in December, Orton was on his Legend Killer gimmick and called out Foley. Foley got ready to fight him but at the last minute bailed out, allowing Orton to spit on him and walk out of the arena, branding him as a coward. At the Royal Rumble, Orton had made a long run but Foley entered at #21 and beat the crap out of Orton.

The problem with this was that when you go after Orton, you get all of Evolution. Except HHH who had more important things to do than fight two first ballot Hall of Famers. This made it 3-1, so Foley needed help. Rock returns to help his friend, and we get this as the end result. If you ever want to see the match that almost single handedly got Batista and Orton over, this is it. It was them being in there with the big boys and we could see what they can do.

I love the old school vs. new school dynamic here. The Rock N Sock Connection hit the ring and the fight is on. Rock vs. Batista is really weird to see. How weird is it that Rock retired younger than Foley? Rock vs. Flair is something that is just awesome to look at and it officially starts us off here. Rock does Flair’s strut and they lock up.

Out to the floor and Flair slips a thumb into the eye. That gets him nowhere as he gets slammed on the floor and Foley adds an elbow off the apron. Off to Orton now and Foley wants in. Orton bails but Foley somehow catches him and the beating is on. Back in with Foley in control. Rock comes in and punches Orton in the balls and then Flair smacks him in the back of the head.

Rock fights off Evolution but gets caught by Batista on the floor with the power game. Off to Orton vs. Rock in the ring now with Orton hammering away. Make that Batista. He’s not as big as he would get but still gets two off an elbow drop. Flair comes in now and throws chops in the corner. He tries to strut and gets his head taken off by a running clothesline. Well why mess with the basics?

Like an idiot, Flair goes up and gets slammed down. Why is anyone surprised at that? Off to Batista who hammers away. The crowd being all attentive is weird. Rock gets a clothesline to Batista and it’s off to Foley now. Double arm DDT is blocked and it’s a slug out. Running knee in the corner is stopped by a clothesline though. That’s a popular move in this match isn’t it?

On the floor Foley grabs the Claw on Orton out of nowhere. This is a good match so it’s hard to make jokes here. For the 1000^th time in his career Foley’s knees slam into the steps with a LOUD bang. Orton in now who hammers away even more. Make that Flair who chops Foley down and then they slug it out. Foley takes him down but Orton comes in for a chinlock/face pull to stop Foley.

Batista comes in as Evolution keeps up that fast tagging. He starts the ground and pound on Foley but Mick slips a hand up and grabs the Claw to break it up. Orton comes in for the save and they keep tagging in and out very quickly. Swinging neckbreaker to Batista buys Foley some time and a double clothesline buys him even more time.

Flair comes in to break up the tag but a shot to the head is enough to bring in Rock who cleans house. DDTs and right hands all around but a Batista spinebuster takes him down. And now Flair wants to do the People’s Elbow. Rock nips up while Flair struts and drills him. There’s a spinebuster for Flair and it’s the REAL People’s Elbow, complete with Rock’s 8^th strut of the match.

RKO doesn’t work but the Rock Bottom does. Flair makes a last second save and then SPRINTS around the ring to grab a chair. Batista Bomb to Rock which gets two for Orton. Rock manages to bring in Foley and he finally gets his hands on Orton. Foley loads up Socko but takes too long and Orton grabs a quick RKO for the pin. Foley sits up afterwards which I like as it makes it look like Foley got stunned but not knocked out. And that my friends, is how you put people over.

Rating: A. This wasn’t so much a great match but rather a work of art out there. They knew what they were doing and the two old masters made stars out of young guys. This is what you’re supposed to do out there as the old guys look great as well and like I said, it was a quick win rather than a dominating one. The key thing there though was that it was a win. Great stuff and worth seeing for what it means to put someone over.

Rock and Foley get a standing ovation as they deserve.

This year’s HOF class is honored. No big name here except Jesse Ventura. Next year it really picks up though. Heenan breaking up over wishing Monsoon was there with him is a very touching moment. Harley Race and Tito Santana go in too. teases running for President in 2008.

They bring them out into the arena to have Mean Gene do the presentations to the crowd. The full list is Bobby Heenan (can barely talk due to throat cancer. The fans chant weasel and Heenan’s reaction is of course hilarious), Tito Santana (one of the most underrated guys ever despite being considered great), Big John Studd (dead, his son is here), Harley Race (one of the best heels ever), Pete Rose (deserves to be in due to what he did at Mania. He was said to be incredibly gracious about being in so I can live with this).

Back to the wrestlers with Don Muraco (took the Snuka Splash that apparently every wrestler ever was inspired by), Great Valentine (gets one of the biggest pops surprisingly enough. Looks JUST like he did in the ring and still does to this day as far as I know), Junkyard Dog (Also dead, his daughter is here for him. It was her high school graduation that he died on the way home from), Billy Graham (perhaps the most influential heel of all time), Sgt. Slaughter (go watch the Alley Fight with Pat Patterson. Incredible fight), and Jesse Ventura (do I need to explain this one?

What’s the best way to follow that up? With this of course:

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

Instead of the traditional rules, this is pinfall. Blast it. This is happening because Torrie/Sable are in Playboy. Sable was doing a weird lesbian kind of thing at the time with Torrie, which is odd because Torrie had just come off a lesbian angle with Dawn, which ended apparently in her sleeping with Dawn.

Sable requests they all start in their underwear. Taz and Cole are cracking up over a joke Taz makes. It actually was funny and tells me these guys are funny in real life. I’m trying not to pay attention here as this is depressing. Torrie and Sable win.

Rating: F. I hate these things. They’re a total waste of time, we’ve seen the girls like this before, and it’s nothing special at all. Total waste of about 9 minutes.

We get some clips from Axxess.

Eddie comes in to talk to Benoit who is very nervous to say the least. He says that win or lose, he’ll be proud of Chris. Benoit says he won’t lose. Eddie says no one really expects Benoit to win, more or less sealing his title win. Benoit says he’s proud of Eddie for winning the WWE Title and Eddie starts laughing. He wants Benoit to get fired up and Benoit is. Tonight they both walk out world champions.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

This is a ten man gauntlet match. Think Tag Team Turmoil with the champion, Chavo Jr., going tenth. Everyone stands at ringside so I’ll just list them off as they go in. Rey comes out last and is the Flash this year. Ultimo Dragon vs. Shannon Moore to start and they’re moving out there, getting three two counts in maybe 40 seconds. Back suplex by Shannon gets two. Whisper in the Wind by Moore misses and Dragon hits the Asai DDT (sets for a Stunner but backflips over Shannon to slam the back of his head into the mat. Looks great) for the pin. I hope this isn’t a pattern.

Jamie Noble is in third and he jumps Dragon to take an early advantage. Dragon unleashes the kicks but misses a moonsault. A neckbreaker by Noble sets up a guillotine choke by Noble to get rid of Dragon.

Funaki comes in and is rolled up and pinned in 4 seconds. I hate these kind of matches for stupid stuff like these last two eliminations. This would never happen in a regular match and makes Funaki and Dragon look like blundering morons.

Nunzio comes in next and begs off instead of charging, which I think is logical here. They trade some holds and Nunzio gets a victory roll for two. Big kick gets two for Nunzio. He tries an O’Connor Roll but Noble ducks to send him to the floor. Noble dives on him with a front flip to put both guys down and Nunzio is counted out.

Billy Kidman is in now and Nunzio trips Noble. Kidman climbs the ropes and throws a Shooting Star Press but underrotates and lands ON TOP OF HIS HEAD! That gets two in the ring and Noble grabs that guillotine again. It’s easily reversed and Kidman adds a running enziguri. He tries the Shooting Star again but Noble runs up to block it. Short powerbomb off the middle ropes gets rid of Noble though as that might have been the longest fall at just under two minutes.

Rey comes in and gets half killed by a dropkick. He gets whipped in and baseball slides between Kidman’s legs while on his back. Kind of awesome. Kidman takes over after some interference from Tajiri’s friend Akio for no apparent reason. They go to the corner and Mysterio gets a sunset bomb to end Kidman.

Tajiri in next and he grabs the Tarantula very quickly. Handspring elbow is blocked by a dropkick and there’s the 619. Akio interferes again and winds up taking the mist to the face. Rey grabs a rollup to end Tajiri.

Akio can’t fight because of the mist. Whatever.

Tajiri kicks Rey in the head and it’s down to Chavo and Mysterio. Rey avoids a charge and gets a rana to take over. Down goes Chavo Senior via a baseball slide. The referee won’t let Rey dive on him though. Dang it give us our injured senior citizens! Ok he’s in his mid 50s here but he looks about 80. Rey is like screw it and dives over the referee to crush Chavo Senior. He tries a sunset flip but Chavo grabs the hand of his son to get the pin to retain. So Chavo pinned Rey in about 1:50? Got it.

Rating: D+. That’s overall. The problem here is simple: they went through it WAY too fast and it was impossible to get into any of the matches. These things need like 30 minutes to work which is why you never see them. This would have been WAY better as a fatal fourway but since both tag titles are in that format we had this. Not a fan of these at all because they make the guys in them look far too beatable.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock. Goldberg was #30 in the Rumble and was being interviewed prior to the match. Lesnar got annoyed that he wasn’t being interviewed since he was WWE Champion at the time. He came in and beat up Goldberg in the Rumble so that Angle could eliminate him after Goldberg was dominating. Austin gave Goldberg a ticket to No Way Out and said don’t do anything he wouldn’t do. Goldberg speared Brock and Eddie won the title because of it (great match if you’ve never seen it).

Austin was named guest referee and then Lesnar popped up and gave Austin an F5. This basically turned into Austin vs. Lesnar instead with Goldberg being on the side. Lesnar stole Austin’s four wheeler and ticking Austin off. Austin beat Lesnar up and took it back, which totally took the spotlight off of Goldberg to eventually set up Brock vs. Austin.

However, this was Lesnar’s last WWE match s he went to the NFL and then the UFC, which made Austin more or less pointless here. Oh and it’s Goldberg’s last match too. Think they’re going to give it that old college try and work as hard as they can? If so, you’re not that smart.

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Let the chanting begin! The shorts on Goldberg never looked right. They stand around for about 20 seconds and we get to the far more interesting part of this match: the crowd. Almost immediately we get a YOU SOLD OUT chant directed at Lesnar. It’s one of the loudest you’ll ever hear outside of Philly and it shakes the guys up it seems. The announcers actually acknowledge it which is saying a lot.

Make that a minute of standing around. There’s the Goodbye Song as they’ve literally stood there staring at each other for a minute and a half. Ross tells us Lesnar is gone and they shout F Bombs at each other. Two minutes with zero contact at all. Now the fans chant for Austin, likely wanting him to Stun them both and just end it at that. Two and a half minutes now. This is all considered part of the match mind you.

At 2:45 they lock up. Amusingly enough Goldberg is called a mixed martial arts aficionado. They go down to their knees in a lockup. That eats up literally 45 seconds and it’s back to staring at each other. We’re four minutes into a thirteen and a half minute match and the total amount of contact is 45 seconds, literally all of which is on a lockup. Think about paying a ticket to see this, one of the feature matches, and getting this. They deserve the crowd reaction they’re getting.

They lock up again and that eats up almost 30 more seconds. The crowd chants THIS MATCH SUCKS and they’re right. The first offensive move of the match comes five minutes in (and yes I’m counting via a counter on the video) with a headlock by Lesnar that goes nowhere. They exchange shoulder blocks and then knock each other down with them. We’re 6:30 into this now and the move list in its entirety is: tie up, tie up, head lock, Goldberg shoulder block, Lesnar shoulder block, double shoulder block.

FINALLY things pick up a bit as Lesnar kicks away. Goldberg is like screw that and press slams him, bringing him down with a half spear/half spinebuster. The regular spear misses though and Goldberg goes chest first into the post. We hit the floor for some Lesnar dominance. I guess that was all the offense Goldberg had in him. The fans aren’t that impressed and tell Goldberg that he sucks.

Back in now and Lesnar really upgrades his offense with a suplex. Into a headlock with an arm trap. This is terrible. This eats up about a minute until Goldberg flips him to ZERO pop. Oh hey let’s go right back to the hold again because it worked so well the first time. Then they ram into each other again and are both down. The fans are livid by the way.

Ross calls the match pedestrian. No Ross, taking a walk would be way more interesting than this. The fans boo the heck out of it as Goldberg makes his comeback. The crowd is chanting for Hogan. In 2004. Wow. Spinning neckbreaker sets up the spear for two. Yeah back then they wanted to drop the Jackhammer because the company was really stupid. F5 hits out of nowhere for two as well. Lesnar misses the spear and then the spear and Jackhammer ends it to make Goldberg 1-0!

Rating: F. This was a disgrace. I don’t care if you’re leaving or not, you don’t do it that way. No excuse for this whatsoever.

Austin, who did NOTHING in the match, stuns both guys post match to try and keep the fans from storming the ring to kill the guys in the match.

WM 21 is in LA.

Vince comes out and says there’s someone that should be thanked for Mania making it to #20. He then amazes even me, perhaps the most jaded wrestling fan there is and he thanks the fans. This amazed me to no end when I saw it and it still does today. Love him or hate him, this was pure class right here.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. APA vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. Basham Brothers

More filler here before we get to the real main events. This is one fall to a finish again. The APA was more or less worthless by this point. I didn’t even know they were still together in 04. Bradshaw would be world champion in the summer. Rikishi and Scotty have the titles coming in here. Bradshaw vs. Benjamin to start us off here.

After JBL takes Shelton down for awhile, Doug Basham tags himself in and I just do not care at this point. Absolutely nothing of note is going on here. Haas vs. Scotty at the moment. Crowd simply does not care either and it’s obvious. Bearhug to Scotty but a Basham comes in for the…save? Scotty is the face in peril I guess. He gets an enziguri but kicks Doug into Danny to keep Scotty from making the tag again.

Off to Rikishi who cleans house. I think he was supposed to be the grizzled veteran that could beat up just about anyone in the match. They pushed him like that for awhile and it didn’t work incredibly well. German attempt by Benjamin but the power of fat sends him to the floor. Haas gets a Stinkface for not funny comedy. Bradshaw comes in to clean house but walks into a Samoan Drop and then Rikishi drops down onto Danny to retain.
Rating: D. Pointless filler. These teams were worthless by this point anyway as they were all on the verge of breaking up. Shelton was in the IC title hunt within a year, JBL debuted that Summer, the Bashams were fired soon thereafter and no one ever cared about Rikishi and Scotty anyway. Total waste of time.

Edge is coming back.

Jesse Ventura is with Donald Trump at ringside. This was when the Apprentice was still a hot show so Trump was a celebrity here. I don’t like him but you have to admit, the guy apparently likes wrestling as this was the 4th show he was a part of. Jesse implies he’ll run for President someday, getting a big pop.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Molly Holly

This is belt vs. hair with Victoria as champion. Victoria got hotter every time I saw her. The crowd is already more into this than they were for the entire previous match. Molly works the arm to control but gets rolled up for two. Suplex gets two for Molly. Molly is a virgin and wears big underwear which is the focal point of the match. She uses really basic stuff and it’s rather boring. Sunset Bomb gets two and then Molly tries the Widow’s Peak. That doesn’t work and Victoria gets a backslide to retain.

Rating: D+. Short and pretty dull. The real thing here was the shaved diva which doesn’t really do much as the stipulation was more or less just thrown on. Lack of an interesting match for the most part but at least Victoria looked good in those little white shorts.

Head shaving ensues.

We recap Eddie vs. Angle. The idea in short is Eddie is a former drug addict and Kurt says that means he shouldn’t represent Smackdown. The idea is that Eddie is in over his head and Heyman, the Smackdown GM, is against Eddie too for no apparent reason.

During the video package, Molly is still being shaved.
Smackdown Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

They lock up in the first minute, already far ahead of Lesnar vs. Goldberg as far as pacing goes. We start with some mat stuff where Eddie is talented but in over his head. Angle takes him down with a judo throw and grabs a headlock. Let’s go Angle/Angle Sucks chants begin dueling. Angle runs him over with a shoulder and it’s a standoff.

Eddie gets a set of shoulder blocks and Angle hits the floor to clear his head. Back in and Angle takes it back to the mat which is where he’s definitely in control for the most part. Front facelock goes on to drain some energy out of the champion. Eddie escapes and we go back to the mat again with Eddie controlling a keylock. This is well done stuff as they’re definitely keeping things interesting out there for this.

Knee to the ribs takes Eddie down and it’s off to an abdominal stretch. Eddie reverses and tries Three Amigos but can only get one as Kurt gets a German. Out to the apron and Angle of course can’t get the German to the floor because it would, you know, kill Eddie. Eddie knocks him to the floor and dives out at Angle but misses, hitting the barrier chest first. That gets two back in the ring.

Angle works on the ribs/midsection even more, eventually hot shotting Eddie onto the top rope for two. Belly to belly sends Eddie flying. Another gets two and it’s back to the ribs. Angle shifts it into a bearhug and then into a belly to belly for two. Middle rope belly to belly is blocked as is the running belly to belly. Frog Splash misses and Eddie’s momentum is gone just as fast as it arrived.

Kurt hammers away as Cole calls him a hypocrite for talking about how Eddie is a disgrace. Eddie shrugs it off and wants more shots. He fires back and gets a little momentum going. A charge in the corner misses and Eddie gets a belly to back suplex for two. Eddie still can’t get Three Amigos and it’s Rolling German time. The second is reversed into a rollup for two and then Angle drills Eddie to take him right back down again.

Angle Slam is countered and Eddie speeds things up a bit. Three Amigos are attempted again and again Kurt counters after a second one. Ankle Lock goes on for a bit but not that long. Dropkick puts Kurt down but as Eddie goes for the Frog Splash Angle gets the running belly to belly two. After a rollup gets two Eddie is caught in a German for two.

Another counter to the Angle Slam, this one in the form of a DDT sets up the Frog Splash for two. Has that ever happened before? Angle plays possum and picks the ankle out of nowhere into the ankle lock. Again he manages to send Kurt to the floor and Eddie is unlacing his boot. Angle doesn’t see this and comes right back with the ankle lock. Eddie kicks the hold off and the boot goes off with it. He grabs a small package on the confused Kurt (and wraps his feet around the ropes to cheat a bit) to retain in a brilliant ending.

Rating: A. Excellent stuff here. There’s definitely a story here with Eddie going move for move with Angle but in the end going back to his roots to pick up the upset. Also look at the intelligence that Eddie shows at the end by playing possum just like Kurt did seconds before to beat Angle as he goes just a step too far to retain the title. Go find this match and watch it. You’ll learn something.

We recap Taker vs. Kane. Kane had buried Taker yet again. This time it was over Taker turning into the American and ceasing to be a monster. I guess the tag title run they had together didn’t count? At the Rumble a Taker Gong went off to scare the heck out of Kane and the distraction let Booker put him out. This kept happening until it was announced his return would be here at Mania.

Undertaker vs. Kane

 

Yeah the build here isn’t quite as good as their first Mania match. Taker gets the full on Mania entrance, complete with darkness, chanting, fire, druids, and PAUL BEARER!!! Taker’s hair isn’t even to his shoulders here so the look is a bit off. Oh and he wears a cowboy hat now. Kane is all scared to death here and shouts that Taker isn’t real. He reaches out and touches Taker (there’s an old commercial in there somewhere) and Taker hammers away.

Kane hides on the floor and Taker starts his usual stuff. The ending is so obvious here it’s unreal. Some corner clotheslines put Kane down but the Last Ride is blocked. They mess up the reverse back body drop as they’re about three feet away from the ropes. Taker does some ground and pound but walks into a sidewalk slam. Top rope clothesline gets two.

They slug it out which of course Taker wins. Kane misses a charge in the corner and a running big boot puts Kane down. Old School is caught by a chokeslam and Kane stops to laugh. Taker sits up, Kane panics and I think you know what’s going to end the match.

Rating: D. This was pretty bad. Taker completely squashed Kane here, which to be fair is more or less Kane’s job. Not much of a match at all although that’s what the people wanted I think. Taker has been the same character since this point for the most part and this was the beginning of the modern Taker.

We recap the Raw World Title match. HHH is champion, Benoit won the Rumble and should get the one on one shot. However, at the Rumble Shawn and HHH tied in a Last Man Standing match so Shawn says he should get another shot. Always thought that was ridiculous. Shawn had his chance, but he didn’t win. It shouldn’t be him again. Anyway he signed the contract anyway so Austin made it a triple threat. The video more or less shows Shawn as a heel because he just wouldn’t let Benoit have his moment.

Raw World Title: Chris Benoit vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

 

Surprisingly normal entrance for HHH here although he’s wearing white boots. We even get a weapons check which you never see anymore. Everyone goes after everyone to start us off here with Shawn avoiding a Crossface. HHH to the floor and the others slug it out. He comes back in when he thinks it’s best as we’re in a slow build here.

DX explodes for a bit and the fans think someone screwed Bret. Leaping knee gets two. Some nice tandem stuff lets Shawn hit a moonsault off the top to the floor to take everyone out. HHH and Shawn go back to the ring now with Benoit out on the floor. Facebuster to Shawn but he can’t hit the Pedigree as Chris saves. Shawn’s shoulder goes into the post and Benoit hits a snap suplex on HHH.

With Benoit in the Tree of Woe HHH throws Shawn into him in a cool spot. Shawn nips up so Benoit knocks him to the floor. Benoit hits Rolling Germans on the Game Shawn stops the headbutt and HHH takes him down with a DDT. Superplex by HHH gets two on Benoit. Make that three twos. The fans like Benoit here. Pedigree is reversed into a bad Crossface which Shawn breaks up.

Rolling Germans by Shawn are booed and reversed into a set by Benoit. Headbutt to Shawn gets two. Forearm and nipup by Shawn but there’s no one else in the ring. HHH comes in and gets beaten on for a bit. Elbow hits and the Band is Tuned Up. The kick connects but Benoit saves. Shawn vs. Benoit now with Shawn being launched into the post to bust him open. Terrible Crossface to Shawn and HHH grabs his arm before he can tap.

Benoit and HHH hit the floor for some brawling while Shawn is down. HHH sends him into the steps and preps the announce table. Just the Smackdown one though, not the Spanish one. Benoit, ever the traditionalist, puts HHH on the Spanish one. German is blocked as it the Pedigree. Shawn pops up and DX suplexes/drops Benoit through the SD table in a cool visual.

Back in the ring now it’s Shawn vs. HHH. They slug it out with neither guy taking over. HHH is sent to the floor and a cameraman is taken out. Ross wants an EMT for Benoit. HHH gets posted (without spam) and is busted as well. Pedigree out of NOWHERE is the counter to some punches. Somehow Benoit makes the save and the crowd pops like a cherry.

Benoit chops away but HHH grabs a Pedigree attempt which is reversed into a long Sharpshooter in an eruption. Shawn kicks Chris’ head off though which somehow only gets two. Ross’ voice is almost gone here. Loud Benoit chant starts up as Shawn Tunes Up the Band. Benoit backdrops him to the floor and walks into another Pedigree attempt. Benoit counters that into a Crossface with HHH in agony. HHH rolls backwards but Benoit hangs on and HHH taps, giving Benoit the World Title in the main event of Wrestlemania.

Rating: A+. Great match, everything clicked, absolute classic. There’s nothing else I can say here.

Eddie comes out to celebrate with Benoit in a classic Wrestlemania moment.

Overall Rating: B. This is good but the length starts to get old after awhile. At 4 ½ hours long it needs about an hour cut off to be a classic. Still though with two great world title matches and some other good stuff in there it’s hard to argue. Also we get a legit Mania moment to end the show which is never a bad thing. Good show and worth seeing, but be ready to fast forward some stuff.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 11, 2004
Location: Evening News Arena, Manchester, England
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Somehow this is the first time the show has ever taken place in England. We’re eight days away from Taboo Tuesday, the show that half the roster seems to hate. I’m not exactly wild on it myself given how the build has gone, but I’m sure this week’s show will end with HHH taking a beating but walking out as champion anyway. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Women’s Title: Stacy Keibler vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending and Stacy is in a Manchester United jersey (with her name spelled Kiebler on the back) with a barely existent skirt. Of course we get the early cartwheel and the boot choke in the corner because that’s all Stacy is good for in something like this. A rollup out of the corner gives us yet another upskirt shot before Trish bails out to the floor.

The champ is smart enough to pull Stacy down and crotch her against the post, followed by wrapping the leg around the post. A half crab keeps Stacy in trouble until she makes a slow crawl to the ropes. Trish gets slammed off the top for two but she gets bored with this mess and hits the Chick Kick to retain.

Rating: D-. Yeah Stacy has long legs and wears revealing outfits. That’s the extent of her talents here it was on full display here (among other things). I get the point of the whole thing but that doesn’t make it a good idea. These are the kind of matches that WWE has gotten away from thanks to the Women’s Revolution, but the history isn’t kind to them.

Post match Molly Holly, Nidia, Gail Kim and Victoria run in for the brawling. I’m sure Taboo Tuesday waits for all of them.

Simon System ad. These are still worth a chuckle.

Tag Team Titles: William Regal/Eugene vs. La Resistance

La Resistance is defending and insult the British fans, who aren’t worthy of hearing the French national anthem. You can imagine the pop Regal gets and carrying the Union Jack makes it even louder. Why the challengers have generic music instead of either of their themes isn’t clear but maybe it’s some international copyright deal?

Regal and Conway start things off with the fans cheering Regal for just breathing, let alone actually doing anything of note. An exchange of forearms to go Regal and I don’t remember the last time I’ve heard a crowd this invested. Eugene comes in with Grenier loaded up in Shattered Dreams position and the Conway goes head first between his legs. The airplane spin makes it even worse for Conway as the fans already want Regal again.

That’s exactly what they get when Conway spends too much time nipping up, allowing Regal to come in for a t-bone suplex. The champs fight back with Au Revoir for two with Eugene making a save. A Stunner takes Conway down so Grenier brings in the title belt, only to walk into the Power of the Punch for the pin and the titles. Regal looks happier than I’ve ever seen him.

And never mind as we come back from a break with Eric Bischoff having restarted the match, earning a loud BULL**** chant from the crowd as Eugene is fighting out of an armbar. The shoulder is sent into the buckle and it’s back to Grenier for some stomping. Conway comes in to tell Eugene to fight like a man and, after drawing Regal in for some double teaming, walks into a collision with Eugene for the hot tag to Regal

Everything breaks down with Regal throwing suplexes for two, with Grenier hitting Conway for a save as Regal had already moved. A Rock Bottom into a People’s Elbow (with Eugene telling Regal to drop the actual elbow) gets two but a flag pole shot to Regal is enough for the pin (with trunks) to retain.

Rating: D. Well, that was stupid. There was little reason to change the title win like that when you could just turn it right back the next week with nothing having been significantly changed. WWE likes to go way too far with these gotcha moments and they’re really annoying when you had a great moment like this.

Taboo Tuesday ad.

British fans are happy to have Raw.

Ric Flair and Batista try to calm HHH down about the fan vote. They’ve got HHH’s back and front.

Video on Kane/Lita/Gene Snitsky. The melodrama is strong on this show, though they’re doing a nice job of making Snitsky a star overnight.

Snitsky joins us via satellite from Connecticut. Last week’s attack on Kane wasn’t his fault because Kane is the bloodthirsty monster attacking him. Was Snitsky just supposed to take it or should he have made a preemptive strike? Snitsky: “Kane said I was a dead man. Well Kane, the only thing dead around here is your baby.” WOW. Anyway he’ll win at Taboo Tuesday and crying like a baby, which Snitsky imitates, complete with a rocking motion. How is this guy not World Champion yet?

Hurricane/Rosey vs. Val Venis/Stevie Richards

Or not as Kane comes out and beats up all four of them with a chair. Venis gets taken out on a stretcher.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat about his mixed emotions over this upcoming match with Flair. Yeah Flair is a legend, but he’s one of the people who cost Orton the World Title. Based on that, Orton has to get even but if you look at Flair, you have to feel pity. That’s not the Flair Orton wants though. He wants the legendary Flair, so here’s Ric to a roar. Flair heard Orton say he felt sorry for him but Flair rode up in a long limousine earlier today and a man asked him how to spell his name.

That would be f-a-m-o-u-s, which is what Flair is. He sees Orton showing off in a custom made suit with a Rolex watch but Flair invented being the man. Flair brags about all the women he’s had before talking about how great Orton has already been. He’s no legend killer though because Flair is still right here. Flair is so sure that he’s going to win that if Orton pulls the miracle, he’ll throw in the limo and some women. Orton turns them down because he has his own but he’ll win anyway. This was promos 201, but it’s not like this is anything more than a pit stop as we build towards the next Orton vs. HHH title match.

Lawler is with the Page 3 girls and looks at some of their pictures (off camera of course). This was what it was.

Chris Jericho vs. Rhyno

Fallout from last week’s lumberjack match with Rhyno costing Jericho the win. Rhyno grabs a headlock to start as the announcers try to find a way to sell Jericho facing one of fifteen people at Taboo Tuesday. The fans are behind Jericho as Rhyno cranks on the arm but Jericho fights out of the corner. A headbutt to the arm puts Rhyno in control again though and we hit a chinlock. A spinebuster takes Jericho down for two but he’s right back with the bulldog. The Lionsault hits knees and it’s time for the Gore, which is cut off by Christian and Tyson Tomko for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The chinlock hurt things but these two always worked fairly well together. The match was fairly slow with Rhyno dominating for the most part, which worked well enough as a way to make him seem like a threat for the title shot. I mean, he has no chance of winning the poll, but at least they’re trying.

Post match Jericho gets beaten down but here’s Coach to announce that we’re not done.

Rhyno/Chris Jericho vs. Christian/Tyson Tomko

Joined in progress with Rhyno running Christian over and handing it off to Jericho for a suplex. Rhyno adds a slam as the announcers recap the show so far. Well what else are they supposed to talk about in a match like this? Tomko shoves Rhyno off the top for a crash to the floor and it’s back to Christian for a chinlock.

Just like in the previous tag match, Christian draws Jericho in and starts with the double teaming (it’s a classic move and still works every time). Christian talks too much trash (a common theme as of late) and gets belly to bellied so Rhyno can bring Jericho back in. The springboard dropkick puts Christian on the floor and it’s a Gore to Tomko, setting up the Lionsault for the pin.

Rating: C-. Somewhat better than the singles version which is probably due to getting more time. Jericho getting the fall seems a bit counterproductive, but then again so does most of everything they’re doing with Taboo Tuesday. I’m hoping we don’t get another Christian vs. Jericho match but I don’t think the fans will go that way, which is quite the relief after watching them feud for so long.

Post match Christian hits Rhyno in the face with the Intercontinental Title but walks into the Walls. Batista makes the save and takes out Jericho before posing with the belt.

Shawn Michaels comes up to Chris Benoit and promises to do what’s best for himself in the main event tonight. Benoit isn’t surprised and promised to do the same thing tonight. Edge comes in and doesn’t like being left out, though Shawn and Benoit don’t seem to care.

Smackdown Rebound.

JR gets serious to talk about John Cena getting stabbed in a nightclub after Smackdown, leaving him in a medical facility. Lawler instantly transitions into a discussion of the Diva Search girls fighting at Taboo Tuesday. From STABBING to an eye candy feud. Such is life in 2004.

We recap Carmella vs. Christy, setting up their match at the pay per view.

Taboo Tuesday voting begins next Monday night at 10pm. They’re cutting it pretty close with the timing.

Taboo Tuesday rundown. The six women from earlier plus Jazz will be in a battle royal and you get to pick their outfits.

More British fans are happy to be here.

Evolution vs. Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho/Edge

Benoit and Batista start things off with Benoit slugging away as you had to expect him to do. The Sharpshooter is easily kicked away and it’s off to Edge for some staring. The fans really don’t like Edge as he forearms away at Batista and shoulders him out to the floor. Back in and Shawn chops away with less success, allowing Flair to come in for a collective WOO. Since Shawn can’t hang with an old man, Benoit comes in and fires off chops in the corner.

That means a Flair Flop and everything breaks down with the good guys all slapping on Figure Fours for a nice visual. Back from a break with Benoit in trouble as Evolution takes turns working on his back with a variety of forearms. HHH hits a British Bulldog style delayed vertical suplex for two and it’s back to Flair, who still gets a nice reception.

Some right hands in the corner keep Benoit in trouble and it’s back to Batista as a fan runs in with Shawn and Edge diving on him with no trouble. Flair kicks Benoit low and puts on the Figure Four as the fans watch/sing to the fan being ejected. Benoit starts to turn the hold over so Flair tags Batista as it’s reversed in a smart move.

An enziguri drops Batista and it’s off to Shawn vs. HHH for old times’ sake. Everything breaks down and it’s a facebuster to Shawn but it’s too early for the Pedigree. Instead it’s a backdrop for the counter, setting up Benoit’s Swan Dive. Edge tags himself in to break up Sweet Chin Music though, leaving Shawn to have to superkick HHH to break up the Pedigree. That’s enough for Edge to steal the pin in a real jerk move.

Rating: B-. These six can do any combination of matches/tag matches for years to more than acceptable results and that’s what they did here. It was another good match but the ending was a bit annoying as we continue to drag through the muck towards Taboo Tuesday. It made sense and is something Edge (suddenly a heel again) should be doing, but it’s still quite the annoying story as it would take a minor miracle for anyone but Shawn to get the shot.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty good main event aside, do you know who is coming off the best on these shows? Snitsky. He’s one of the only people who doesn’t have some kind of a swerve or a stupid move in most of his segments and they aren’t exactly hammering in what they want the fans to vote for at the show.

Taboo Tuesday is screaming REALLY BAD IDEA more and more every week and this was no exception, with HHH worrying about who he has to face, Orton in an acceptable yet not exactly thrilling feud with Flair (though the promos are good) and Jericho facing a field. It’s making it hard to build towards the show and the problem gets worse by the week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 4, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for a big show as we’re in the World’s Most Famous Arena for one of the last two shows before a gimmick pay per view on a Tuesday. Last week’s Raw saw Randy Orton try to turn Ric Flair away from the dark side, only to get screwed out of the Taboo Tuesday title match voting. I’m sure you know where this is headed so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Orton and Flair last week with Orton’s very good promo that was wasted by the end of the night.

Opening sequence.

The arena is set up as normal, which takes away some of the MSG charm.

Here are HHH and Ric Flair for a chat. Flair recaps last week and wants to correct himself: HHH isn’t the greatest wrestler alive because he’s the greatest of all time. So isn’t he the greatest alive too? Flair is the only man who can say that because Orton has been barred from the building. I’m not sure how those things go together but Flair keeps going by ripping on people Orton has taken out who certainly aren’t legends.

As for Taboo Tuesday, Flair and Orton are fighting one more time in either a falls count anywhere match, a submission match or a cage match. HHH talks about how Taboo Tuesday is going to be a complete disaster (he’s not wrong) because fans can’t be relied on to make decisions. He’s supposed to rely on people like the ones in the front row to make decisions? These people must like that they get to decide Evolution’s fate. To quote an “overrated Hollywood actor”, “It doesn’t matter what you think.”

Taboo Tuesday is a joke and a sham but here’s Chris Jericho to interrupt. Jericho says that this is NOT a repeat, even though HHH is complaining about Taboo Tuesday again. This is Raw Is Jericho so let’s take a poll here tonight. The fans don’t seem to think that HHH is the greatest wrestler alive today, or the greatest of all time for that matter. What about the biggest horse’s a** that ever walked the face of the earth? Jericho: “It looks like we have a winner!”

Jericho reminds us that he inspired Taboo Tuesday in the first place and he’ll be the one laughing when HHH loses the title. Flair demands that he come out here right now for some respect but Jericho comes to the ring with a chair. Cue Batista from behind though and the beatdown is on until Edge and Chris Benoit makes the save. Sounds like another six man, which is far from a bad idea.

Sidebar: so allegedly the reason why HHH got the title back at Unforgiven was he didn’t think fans would want to vote on three heels for Taboo Tuesday. The voting for the Orton vs. Flair match proves that what he’s saying is completely ridiculous, as you could have had the fans pick a stipulation for Orton vs. HHH and swap Flair in for HHH to face Shawn, Edge or Benoit with everything else being the same. How was that not a viable option? Other than HHH doesn’t get the title back of course.

Christian isn’t that impressed with being in Madison Square Garden because Shawn Michaels gets too much credit for that one ladder match in this building. He had a big match here at Wrestlemania XX and actually won. When he beats Shawn tonight, he’s taking the torch the fans are carrying for Michaels.

Shawn Michaels vs. Christian

Tomko is with Christian of course. They go with the basics to start with Shawn hitting a shoulder and grabbing a headlock takeover. As the hold stays on, there’s a sign in the crowd saying Christian is a Major Punk with C M PUNK in red letters. Subtle but I’ve seen worse. Shawn doesn’t take kindly to being slapped in the face and Thesz presses Christian down for some right hands. Christian sends him into the corner to take over as the announcers talk about the intelligence of the fans.

A missed charge crotches Christian though and Shawn knocks Tomko down for good measure. Sweet Chin Music takes forever to set up as usual so Tomko pulls Christian to the floor. That just earns him Sweet Chin Music of his own and we take a break. Back with Shawn not being able to fight out of a chinlock as Tomko has already been helped out. The reverse tornado DDT gives Christian two, followed by the reverse DDT backbreaker for the same.

Christian hits the chinlock again but this time Shawn is up in a hurry and it’s a double knockdown for a pair of nine counts. Shawn is back with the forearm into the nipup to start the comeback but a quick Unprettier plants him. Christian’s very delayed cover gets two and the fans are very pleased. As they should be since this has been good so far. Christian heads up top but gets backdropped down, setting up the top rope elbow. Sweet Chin Music hits for the clean finish.

Rating: B. Rather strong match here with Shawn winning clean as he gets some more momentum on the way to Taboo Tuesday. Christian losing might not be the best idea long term but at least he got to hang with one of the best around. That’s going to help him going forward as he’s already an established midcarder/upper midcarder. Just get up the ladder a little higher and stay there longer and he’ll be set.

Earlier today, Lita said that she was in a predicament but is now sad that she lost the baby. You know, the one that was basically the spawn of the devil. Now though, she hates Snitsky and doesn’t buy the idea that it wasn’t his fault. Come on after all those times he’s said it, how can it not be true? She starts shouting and recaps the whole story, which lowers her acting skills by at least 38%.

Eric Bischoff asks an unseen woman if they have a deal and they shake hands. He’ll see her in the ring later tonight. Coach comes in and asks why she is here, because proper nouns are only used when it’s appropriate. Coach is also worried about interviewing Snitsky so Bischoff says JR can do it instead.

Batista vs. Chris Benoit

Flair is out with Batista, who gets knocked to the floor in a hurry. Back in and Benoit goes after the leg with a dragon screw legwhip and Batista limps around the floor. The knee is fine enough to hit a big spinebuster back inside and it’s time to work on Benoit’s back. Benoit sends him into the corner though and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. With Flair being knocked off the apron, Batista shoves off a Crossface attempt. Flair gets in a low blow and posts Benoit but Orton runs in to break up the Batista Bomb for the DQ.

Rating: C. It was fun while it lasted due to the high levels of intensity you knew were coming from these two but the ending was what mattered. Orton fighting through Evolution to get to HHH again is fine, but there’s only so much you can do when Evolution gets the upper hand on him or Orton has to run away every week.

Post match Orton stays on Batista but Bischoff sends out security to arrest him. Flair and Batista get in a few cheap shots to take Orton down.

Post break Bischoff is in the ring to complain about Taboo Tuesday. Speaking of the show, Snitsky will face Kane in a Fans Pick The Weapon match with a lead pipe, a steel chair or a steel chain being legal. As for Chris Jericho, who laughed at the idea of HHH facing three people, he’ll have to defend the Intercontinental Title against anyone not already in a match, which means nearly twenty options. Bischoff wants to see those people in his office in about fifteen minutes.

That brings him to his match with Eugene, who he wants in the ring right now. Eugene comes out and Bischoff tells him that someone in the back has a crush on him. That would be Carmella, who Bischoff thinks should have won the Diva Search. She also has a match with Christy Hemme at Taboo Tuesday, but for now Bischoff explains that she was in Playboy. He whispers what that means to Eugene, who freaks out.

Carmella talks about how hot she finds Eugene, except for his hair. See, if Eugene loses the hair vs. hair match on purpose, she would find him perfect. Eugene agrees, but he wants a kiss now. That’s not happening so Eugene will settle with Carmella taking her top off. That’s not happening either because Carmella is too good for Eugene or these people. Bischoff likes her style so the match with Christy is still on. Cue Christy to shove Carmella and kiss Eugene.

So now we’re getting more Christy vs. Carmella? Was that really such an awesome feud that it needs a sequel? I know WWE has put a lot into this whole thing but for some reason now we’re stuck with seeing them on pay per view. At least it’s going to be short, but Taboo Tuesday was already looking bad enough as it was.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Rhyno/Tajiri

La Resistance is defending and Grenier actually gets to finish O Canada. After some confusion over whether or not this is for the titles, Conway headlocks Hurricane to start. Rosey comes in for a save and a double legdrop (one between the legs and one on the neck) has Conway in trouble. Hurricane gets knocked off the top though and we hit a front facelock. Conway pulls Rosey off the apron, leaving Hurricane to take Au Revoir for the fast pin.

Post match Rosey keeps going after the champs, who turn his mask around. The blind Rosey lays out Hurricane in what seems to be setting up a rematch. It would help a bit if they hadn’t just lost in two minutes.

WWE received an award from Make-A-Wish.

Simon System ad. Simon: “My name is Simon Dean and odds are, I don’t like you.”

Edge says you should vote for him because he’s never faced HHH, unlike Michaels and Benoit, who have faced HHH over and over in a million title shots. Edge lists off all the titles he’s won and injuries he’s suffered and now he deserves a chance. Fair enough, though his face/heel shifting is getting annoying.

The people who could face Jericho at Taboo Tuesday are in Bischoff’s office. Bischoff has a job for them tonight: they’re going to be lumberjacks when Jericho faces HHH.

Stacy Keibler vs. Molly Holly

Trish Stratus is on commentary and isn’t too kind to Christy based on what happened last week. Stacy bites Molly’s finger to start (Trish: “Whatever works.”) and there’s the boot choke in the corner. Molly gets in a suplex as Lawler is very pleased by the visuals of Stacy’s skirt. The slapping doesn’t get Stacy very far so we look at Trish on commentary instead. A missed knee in the corner lets Stacy kick Molly down but Trish heads to the ring for a distraction. For once it actually doesn’t work as Stacy blocks the rollup and pins Molly for the upset. They wouldn’t be stupid enough to have Stacy vs. Trish for the title would they?

HHH vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title lumberjack match. Jericho jumps him after the posing and hits a backdrop before HHH can even get his belt off. The title falls off when HHH is sent outside and the lumberjacks start hammering away. Back in and HHH throws him outside for the same treatment. Jericho is fine enough to slingshot over HHH into a failed Walls attempt so it’s a catapult into the corner instead.

HHH sends him outside for more stompings, followed by blocking the Walls again so Jericho can get sent outside for the third time in about two minutes. This time Christian jumps him but Jericho thinks it was Rhyno and beats him up instead. Back in (again) and Jericho misses the Lionsault, knocks Batista off the apron, and finally gets the Walls. That’s broken up as Flair has to be dispatched, followed by a big dive onto a bunch of lumberjacks. With the referee distracted, Rhyno comes in for the Gore to give HHH the pin.

Rating: D-. What a waste of time, especially with the lumberjacks. If they don’t want to have either of these two do a job (as they shouldn’t), don’t set the match up in the first place. This was a bunch of throwing each other to the floor and failed finisher attempts until Rhyno came in to finish things off. Another bad main event to cap off a series of terrible matches tonight.

Post match the fight is on with Orton coming in to hit some RKO’s on random people. A big one to Coach (more like a jumping Stunner) finishes the show.

Overall Rating: D. Well that was bad. The usual suspects had their good matches as always but at the same time, we had a bunch of terrible matches and promos that consisted of “Taboo Tuesday is stupid” and heels saying “we hate this” over and over. The problem is we’re coming up on what feels like any given pay per view but we have a bunch of completely acceptable stipulations to pick from. That doesn’t make for an interesting show, which is something this place could really use right now. Hopefully it picks up, but I’m not exactly thrilled with the prospects right now.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 20, 2004
Location: Tuscon Convention Center, Tuscon, Arizona
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the season premiere of Raw and that means….I’m not sure really as wrestling doesn’t have seasons. One thing tonight is the end of the Diva Search, meaning the segments that have managed to make great looking women in swimsuits a chore to sit through are over. Other than that, we’re coming up on Taboo Tuesday, which we don’t know much about. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Jim Barnett, a longtime promoter in the NWA and Australia.

Here’s Vince McMahon to open things up. After a quick welcome, he wants to get to the major announcement promised, which concerns everyone, including Eric Bischoff. This brings out a limping Bischoff (thanks to having a sledgehammer dropped on his fott a few weeks back) and Vince gets to the point. A few weeks ago, Chris Jericho suggested that the fans vote on a type of match. That’s a good idea, but what about doing it on a full pay per view?

Indeed, on October 19, we’ll be seeing a new concept called Taboo Tuesday (yes Tuesday) where the fans get to vote on everything from who gets a World Title shot to what the Divas are wearing. Bischoff loves the idea on paper but doesn’t think these people are capable of making such decisions. Vince is a busy man so maybe he should think about this for a week. Next Monday, Bischoff can have another idea that isn’t involving the fans taking control.

That sounds like patronizing to Vince, and there’s a reason that Bischoff is the GM of Raw and Vince isn’t the GM of Nitro (good line). Maybe Bischoff doesn’t like the idea because with the fans picking things, there’s no need for a GM. Actually, Vince thinks Bischoff should be wrestling that night, against this man. Cue the still injured Eugene and Bischoff isn’t sure what to do.

They’ll be facing off at Taboo Tuesday and the fans get to pick what happens to the loser. Vince even has options: the loser is the winner’s servant, the loser has to wear a dress, or the loser’s head is shaved. Bischoff immediately tries to talk Eugene out of the match because he loves his nephew. They could go out and get some ice cream tonight but Eugene knocks him out instead.

The fans didn’t exactly react to the concept, and I can’t say I blame them. As Bischoff said it’s good on paper, but I’m not sure how well it’s going to go in practice. On a related note though, how much better is it to have Eugene back at a level where he belongs? It’s probably way too late, but this was more charming than annoying and that’s a positive sign for him.

We look back at Randy Orton attacking HHH last week, including the cake. Orton got him at the end of the show as well, but HHH still left as champion so it’s not like it mattered all that much. Shelton Benjamin and Chris Benoit ran in for the save to end the show, meaning we’re probably in for a six man tonight.

Hey look there’s a six man tonight.

Stacy Keibler/Victoria vs. Molly Holly/Trish Stratus

In case you didn’t get enough of Stacy wrestling last week. Stacy mocks Molly’s dancing from last week because she frowns on culture. Victoria takes Trish down early to start and the standing moonsault (now minus the dancing) gets two. Molly comes in and walks into a powerslam as Lawler talks about getting to dress the Divas at Taboo Tuesday. A giant swing doesn’t work well for Victoria with the announcers mocking her for it, but thankfully it’s not time for a tag to Stacy just yet. The spinning side slam plants Trish and now it’s off to Stacy for two. Molly comes back in and gets caught in a backslide for the quick pin. Yay indeed.

Orton reads Raw Magazine because that’s what wrestlers do. Vince comes in and says “Sucks doesn’t it?” He’s talking about reality, which is what caused Orton to lose the title. Orton promises to win the title back because it’s his destiny. This interests Vince, who tells Orton to give it his all.

Billy Graham is here.

We look back at Gene Snitsky causing Kane to accidentally injury Lita last week.

Snitsky has been blamed all week but it wasn’t his fault. Last week Snitsky was there to do a job and he did that. To repeat, it wasn’t his fault!

Hurricane vs. Tajiri

This is fallout from a tag match on Heat. They fight over a wristlock to start until Tajiri kicks him in the face. Hurricane gets in a clothesline to set up a seated full nelson but Tajiri fights up without much effort. A tornado DDT is blocked and Tajiri gets in a superkick. Hurricane is right back with something like a neckbreaker but Tajiri reverses the cover into a crucifix for the fast pin.

Post match Hurricane is mad and takes the mask back from a fan. That’s quite the nice heel move.

Kane is at a medical facility (thankfully in street clothes instead of his gear) and says there is a 50/50 chance of saving the baby. Upon hearing Snitsky’s name, Kane gets a lot angrier and vengeance seems to be sworn. So this is the start of Kane’s face turn, though it’s still not the nicest of scenarios.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Jericho is defending and has hacked his hair off for a pretty bad look. Christian comes out for commentary as a bonus. As expected, they fight over arm control to start until Shawn takes him down with a headlock. Back up and Shawn gets sent over the top so the cat get skinned, allowing him to come off the top with a high crossbody, which gets rolled through for two. A backbreaker keeps Shawn in trouble as Christian dubs himself the Show Stealer, which is much better than the Showstopper.

Jericho’s superplex attempt is broken up without much effort and Shawn hits the early top rope elbow. That’s enough for Christian, who goes to the ring to steal the show. He manages to get in but Shawn knocks him right back out, only to walk into the enziguri from Jericho. Christian gets ejected (wrestling referees have no jurisdiction over commentators) and we take a break. Back with Shawn starting in on the leg and grabbing the Figure Four. That’s broken up in a hurry so Shawn gets smart and stays on the leg.

Jericho grabs a small package for the break and kicks Shawn down, only to jam his knee on a Lionsault attempt. The rapid fire pinfall reversal sequence gives us some good near falls until Jericho takes him down again and scores with the Lionsault this time around. Jericho goes with the straight right hands this time around but Shawn is right back up with the forearm into the nipup. Shawn nips up and gets caught in the Walls, only to have Jericho let go and dropkick the invading Tyson Tomko down. That’s enough for Sweet Chin Music to connect but a very, very slow crawl over for the cover draws Christian in for the DQ.

Rating: B. It was good while it lasted and I can understand why they went with the DQ finish. It’s annoying, but Shawn isn’t going to be Intercontinental Champion and Jericho isn’t ready to lose the thing yet. Christian and Tomko are almost annoying at this point though, as the match was getting really good when the interference started.

Post match Christian shouts at Shawn and beats him up, which is one of the first times I’ve bought him as a bigger time heel.

Smackdown Rebound.

Kane has freaked out at the medical facility with a lot of screaming ensuing.

HHH complains to Evolution about the fans voting because fans are stupid. Flair tells HHH to calm down because he’s the best ever and all that jazz.

Long recap of the Diva Search, with the eliminated women talking about how much they learned about respecting the business. I’m not sure if I want to laugh or glare over a line that stupid.

Rob Conway vs. Maven

What are we doing here? Conway jumps Maven from behind to start as the USA chants start up in a hurry. Maven fights out of a chinlock and stops a charge in the corner before hitting a high crossbody. That’s rolled through to give Conway two (second time we’ve seen that spot in as many matches) before Maven hooks a small package for the pin. Nothing match and it’s still Maven.

Lita’s doctor says she lost the baby, because a doctor is going to do that on national television ten minutes after the fact. Kane comes out of the room and nearly kills the doctor but beats up a wall and screams instead. Hey the wall didn’t hurt your baby dude.

Simon Dean wants to help you lose weight. Seeing the Simon System advertised on VHS is so strange. Simon: “Remember, you can be fat, unattractive and die alone, or you can do the right thing and pick up the phone.”

JR and King do their somber voices about Lita losing the baby.

And now, the Diva Search finals, because WWE doesn’t know what a transition is. Coach mocks both of them and goes to get the envelope but here’s Trish, looking very out of place in a dress, to interrupt. After making fun of all the tasks the women have had to go through, she promises an official victory party for the winner next week. With Trish gone, Christy wins the contest and cheers a lot. She says it’s all about the energy and that she doesn’t need decaf. Carmella gives the lame “oh well it was fun” response doesn’t care about the booing. After some more lame answers, this whole thing is finally done, thank goodness.

Evolution vs. Randy Orton/Chris Benoit/Shelton Benjamin

Shelton knocks HHH down to start and thankfully the announcers bring up Shelton beating him a few times. A shoulder block just lets Shelton nip up so HHH tries the right hands. That goes badly as well as HHH gets backdropped, only to drive Shelton into the corner. So strength seems to work on Shelton, which is why HHH tags Flair instead of Batista. Some cerebral. Benoit tags himself in as well and it’s time for the chop off. Flair gets the worse of it and the Swan Dive connects for two as everything breaks down.

Orton loads up the RKO on the floor but gets posted, allowing Batista to hit the big clothesline. That means Orton needs medics and we take a break. Back with Shelton coming in off the hot tag to clean house and hitting a Stinger Splash on Flair. Batista misses a charge into the corner, though he comes nowhere near the post for a bit of a weird visual. HHH finally gets in a knee and Shelton is in trouble for a change.

Things slow down with Flair hammering away in the corner and HHH coming in without a tag, though Lawler is sure he saw one. I’ll take his word for it. The spinebuster gives HHH two and it’s back to Flair for the Figure Four. That’s broken up as well but Batista remembers that he’s in the match and works on the leg as well. The slow motion holds continue until Shelton kicks Batista in the face, allowing the hot tag to Benoit.

Everything breaks down (of course) and Benoit suplexes both Batista and Flair. HHH comes back in and takes one of his own, leaving Flair to get caught in the Sharpshooter. That’s broken up by HHH but here’s Orton to charge down the ramp and tag himself in. A few right hands send HHH running and the RKO finishes Flair.

Rating: C+. And thus it’s another attempt to get Orton a big moment. That’s all well and good, but having him already win and lose the title makes this feel out of place. The fans aren’t exactly enamored with Orton at the moment and having him taken out so Benoit and Benjamin can wrestle most of the match isn’t going to help things. The only thing that can make it better is him winning the title from HHH and being a hero, but that’s not going to happen because it’s HHH’s title and no one is getting over as a hero while that is the case.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling was pretty watchable this week but for the most part I kept wondering if this is what we were really doing. A lot of the show just felt like it was there for the sake of doing something with the time as we sit around and wait on the next big story. Orton, at least in this form, isn’t going anywhere anytime soon and that leaves us back where we were a year ago. Something needs to be shaken up around here very soon, but it might be a long time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6