Impact Wrestling – July 15, 2021: The Other Thing They Do Well

Impact Wrestling
Date: July 15, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo Brown 

It’s the go home show for Slammiversary and that should make for a different kind of night. The card is set, but there are still a few things that could use a bit more of a boost. Impact has a tendency to do well around this time of year and we might be in for some more teasing of some new arrivals. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

We get a video from Sami Callihan, who wants his Slammiversary World Title match against Kenny Omega to be a No DQ match.

Tenille Dashwood/Kaleb With A K vs. Rachael Ellering/Jordynne Grace

Grace cranks on Kaleb With A K’s hand to start and plants him with a release side slam. There isn’t much of a challenge here so Grace throws him into the corner for a tag to Dashwood. Ellering comes in with a World’s Strongest Slam and everything breaks down in a hurry. Stereo spinebusters plant Dashwood and Kaleb With A K as Josh gives us some “great” news: Matt Striker is back at Slammiversary. Dang it I was just starting to tolerate commentary again.

Ellering gets her face slammed into the mat (sounds like how I felt when I heard about Striker) but she tosses Dashwood outside. A sunset flip pulls Kaleb With A K’s pants down, meaning it’s time for some gyrations. Dashwood pulls Grace off the apron to prevent a tag, leaving Kaleb With A K to drop a knee. A missed charge allows the hot tag off to Grace though and it is time to clean house in a hurry. The Liger Bomb gets two on Kaleb With A K with Dashwood having to make the save.

Grace hits a quick Vader Bomb and Ellering adds a springboard spinning legdrop for two more. Kaleb With A K is back with a superkick to Grace but gets taken down by the Sling Blade. Dashwood Spotlight Kicks Ellering but walks into a spinebuster from Grace. The villains head to the floor so Grace runs through Dashwood with the suicide dive. Back in and Grace charges into a powerslam (with her head hitting the mat) for two but Ellering comes in for an assisted swinging Rock Bottom to give Grace the pin at 7:58.

Rating: C. I liked this one more than I expected as Grace and Ellering match up with Kaleb With A K size wise. It might not have been a classic or anything but Grace and Ellering seem to be on the same page (for now). They could be back in a title feud soon, as it isn’t like there is anyone else who could chase them at the moment.

Video on Kenny Omega vs. Sami Callihan, who DOES NOT care how many stars Dave Meltzer gives Omega’s matches. We do get a quick look at Callihan’s history with Don Callis, which has not been touched on very much during this feud but does tie in.

Video on Deonna Purrazzo’s Knockouts Title reign. She has beaten everyone, but this time she is fighting the unknown.

Purrazzo is not happy with not knowing who she is facing and doesn’t want to sign the contract. She goes on a rant about how annoyed she is and then signs the contract anyway, with Scott D’Amore saying it can be a hot mess and hardcore country around here. Purrazzo: “You’re not telling me who my opponent is?” D’Amore: “No way Jose.”

Here’s what is coming tonight plus at Slammiversary. Callihan vs. Omega is officially No DQ.

Tasha Steelz vs. Havok

Kiera Hogan and Rosemary are here too. Havok shoves her around to start without too much trouble and we take an early break. Back with Steelz hitting a middle rope neckbreaker to take over. The stomping is on in the corner as Rosemary is looking concerned. A superkick in the corner lets Steelz dance a bit but she is stunned by the kickout. Well then don’t dance so much. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Havok powers up and shakes her off in a hurry. Havok hits the running knee in the corner but Steelz strikes away to stagger her. A belly to belly gives Havok two but Steelz hits a pump kick. Not that it matters though as the Tombstone finishes for Havok at 9:49.

Rating: C-. Steelz is the less impressive half of the team but she did well enough here. This was your standard preview of the tag match and while it is effective, it isn’t the most inspired idea. The titles probably need to change hands at the pay per view as Fire N Flava have held them for a good while, but that has been the case for a pretty long time now.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Chris Sabin wins the X-Division Title at Slammiversary 2013.

Video on W. Morrissey.

Susan comes out of a dressing room and tells Kimber Lee that James Mitchell had trouble summoning Su Yung. Lee: “You know?” Susan: “I’VE KNOWN ALL ALONG!” Susan drags her into the room and I’m scared of where this is going.

Steve Maclin vs. Kal Herro

Maclin takes sends Herro into the ropes to start and drops him with an elbow to the face. Herro gets tied in the Tree of Woe for some trash talk (a rarity from Maclin) and a spear for a bonus. Maclin promises to make him quit, just like everyone did on him but Herro jawbreaks his way to freedom. That’s a bad idea as Maclin hits a hard clothesline into some elbows to the face. The reverse sitout implant DDT finishes Herro at 2:28. Maclin is starting to grow on me.

Post match Maclin says the worst thing you can do is give him time, because it lets him prepare and wait. He is done waiting.

Decay is happy with Havok but Rosemary wants to know if Havok is in or out. James Mitchell shows up and Havok says she is ready. Everyone leaves together.

Video on Ultimate X.

Ace Austin/Madman Fulton/Rohit Raju/Shera vs. Petey Williams/Trey Miguel/Josh Alexander/Chris Bey

Williams and Raju run the ropes to start until Raju hits a knee to the ribs. A crucifix gives Williams two and it’s off to Alexander vs. Austin. An early ankle lock attempt doesn’t work so Alexander pulls him to the corner by the arm for the tag to Miguel. Austin misses a springboard kick to the face but rolls straight over for the tag off to Fulton. Snake Eyes into a big boot lets Fulton do his best Undertaker impression as commentary talks about Busted Open Radio.

Austin comes back in for two off a northern lights suplex but Trey manages to flip out of a German suplex. An enziguri rocks Fulton and the hot tag brings in Bey to clean house. Everything breaks down and Alexander snaps off a German suplex. Raju blocks one of his own and neckbreakers Alexander, only to get caught in Williams’ Canadian Destroyer. The parade of secondary finishers is on until Bey rolls Fulton up for the pin at 6:24.

Rating: C+. This was a fun one and they didn’t bother going ridiculous with things. If nothing else, having one of the people not involved in the title match take the fall made sense. On top of that, it was nice to not hear about gaining momentum for a match that has nothing to do with pinfalls, because that still doesn’t make sense.

Post match, Bey cleans house with a chair and then turns on his partners. Makes sense given what he’s been saying lately.

Brian Myers offers to pay Hernandez for his services but Hernandez wants full time pay. With that not working, Myers talks to someone we don’t see.

Here are Brian Myers and Sam Beale, with the former having to admit that Jake Something is professional. Cue Something, with Matt Cardona. Myers admits that Jake is a professional, but he is never going to become a star. The brawl is on with Cardona getting the better of things but Tenille Dashwood (Cardona’s ex), the mystery person from earlier, is here to hit Cardona low.

Post break, Cardona rants about Brian Myers but Scott D’Amore comes in to suggest a mixed tag. Cardona thinks he can find a partner.

Video on Moose vs. Chris Sabin.

Moose vs. Hernandez

Fallout from Moose wrecking Swinger’s Palace. They brawl out to the floor with Moose being sent into the barricade. Back in and a release Rock Bottom plants Hernandez and Lights Out is good for the pin at 1:08.

Post match Moose grabs a chair but Chris Sabin runs in for the save and takes out Moose’s legs.

We get a video on Sami Callihan’s insanity, with Don Callis and Kenny Omega adding their thoughts on how horrible Callihan is.

Slammiversary rundown.

Doc Gallows vs. Joe Doering vs. Fallah Bahh vs. Willie Mack

There are a bunch of people at ringside. Gallows and Doering stare each other down to start but Mack and Bahh break that up to start the fight. With the tall guys cleared out, Mack and Bahh chop it out but neither can hit anything else. That means a stalemate until the other two come back in to pair off. They all fight out to the floor until Mack takes Gallows back inside for an exchange of choking in the corner. Bahh hits the running hip attack but Doering comes back in to kick him to the floor.

Gallows and Mack take their places inside with Gallows booting him in the face. The chinlock goes on but Gallows misses an elbow, allowing Doering to come back in. That doesn’t last long either though as everyone goes outside for another slugout. Gallows hurts himself headbutting Bahh but is fine enough to go back in for a slugout with Doering. That winds up on the floor as well, with Gallows hitting the post by mistake. Back in and Doering crossbodies Bahh, setting up a short arm clothesline for the pin at 8:41.

Rating: C. Take four guys and have them beat on each other for about eight and a half minutes until one of them gets the pin. This is a formula that is going to work every time and it worked fine here. You don’t need to do anything more than that, though it is a little odd to have the champion actually win one of these on the way to the pay per view.

One last Omega vs. Callihan video wraps us up.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was about setting up the pay per view and it did that well enough. It was kind of nice to focus on just about everything other than the World Title match, which was already been built up but did get some attention with a few videos. Impact knows how to do pay per views fairly well and making me want to see it is a good start, so well done here.

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 24, 2021: One Of The Nice Ones

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 24, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo brown

We are on the way to Slammiversary and the show is starting to take shape. This week is likely going to deal with the fallout of Tommy Dreamer (yep) being announced as the new Anthem representative, because not only do we need two bosses, but one needs to be Tommy Dreamer. Last week Dreamer fired Don Callis, right before Kenny Omega gets to defend against Sami Callihan. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the end of last week’s show with Dreamer announcing Callis’ firing. There is something interesting about the network representative firing a former network representative.

Don Callis and Kenny Omega arrive but Callis is not on the talent list. Callis lists off his recent accomplishments and he insists that he is here with Omega.

Rosemary vs. Kiera Hogan

Tasha Steelz is here with Hogan. We hit the stall button to start with Hogan bailing to the floor in a what is likely a wise move. Commentary talks about the MICKIE trash bag from last week as Rosemary plants Hogan with a side suplex for two. Hogan charges into a knee in the corner and it’s the Upside Down to make it even worse. Steelz trips Rosemary down though and it’s time for Hogan to choke on the rope. A lot of trash is talked so here is Havok to chase Steelz off.

Hogan hits a running corner dropkick for two and it’s time to stomp away in the corner. Another running boot sets up more stomping as Hogan is more aggressive than usual here. Back up and Rosemary grabs her by the throat, setting up an SOS slam. A Sling Blade sets up Austin Aries’ Last Chancery, sending Hogan over to the rope. Rosemary hits a reverse DDT for two but Hogan is back up with something like a bulldog. Hogan kicks her in the head for two but Rosemary is right back with As Above So Below for the pin at 8:02.

Rating: C. They aren’t being subtle about what they’re setting up with for the Tag Team Title match and they aren’t trying to. Rosemary and Havok are fine enough as the next challengers, as it isn’t like they have any regular teams around here in the first place. Rosemary winning likely means Havok beating Steelz soon, which is a tired trope it’s better than nothing.

We look at last week’s brawl between the X-Division.

Chris Bey isn’t joining either side in the X-Division battle. Trey Miguel and Petey Williams come in to ask which side he wants to be on. I believe he just answered that people.

Tommy Dreamer talks about how he is here to run the company for the best. Scott D’Amore come in to thank Dreamer for what he said last week but Dreamer is sticking around as a consultant. D’Amore isn’t happy.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Susan vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Non-title and Kimber Lee is here with Susan. They talk trash to each other to start with Purrazzo shoving her in the face. The headlock doesn’t last long as it’s time for a standing switch. Purrazzo takes her down with ease and stops to yell at Lee. A Tequila Sunrise has Susan in more trouble and something like a curb stomp makes it worse.

Susan is knocked outside and Lee has to help her back in so Purrazzo can grab a cross arm choke. A Backstabber out of said choke gets two, with Purrazzo pulling her up. Susan starts the comeback and manages a superplex but Purrazzo snaps on the Fujiwara armbar for the tap at 6:53.

Rating: D+. This was almost a squash with Purrazzo never being in anything close to trouble. Above all else, this match made me feel bad for Susan, who has fallen through the floor since this whole angle started. She went from being the force in the division to just a person and that is a shame. Purrazzo is awesome, but Susan deserves a lot better.

Post match Purrazzo stays on her but Kimber Lee makes the save, likely setting up next week.

TJP and Fallah Bahh b. Decay on Before The Impact.

Fallah Bahh keeps losing at Swinger’s Palace when Willie Mack and Rich Swann come in. Johnny Swinger doesn’t like him because the Mack And Pack connection is over. John E. Bravo and Swann compare shoes and a tag match is set up between Bahh/TJP and Swann/Mack.

Don Callis sucks up to Tommy Dreamer and talks him into being part of a six man tag against Kenny Omega/the Good Brothers.

Rohit Raju/Shera vs. Petey Williams/Trey Miguel

Raju hits Williams in the face to start but gets dropped into 619 position for a running dropkick to the back. The Tree of Woe O Canada has Raju in more trouble and it’s off to Miguel for a double hiptoss into a double backbreaker. Shera comes in to shove Williams into the corner and a quick powerslam plants him for two. We take a break and come back with Raju chinlocking Williams, who fights up in a hurry.

Miguel comes in to pick up the pace, including an atomic drop and cutter to drop Raju. Back up and Raju hits a quick jumping Downward Spiral but Miguel is over for the tag in a hurry. Williams cleans house and loads up the Canadian Destroyer but here are Ace Austin and Madman Fulton for a distraction. Raju hits the Drive By for the pin at 9:04.

Rating: C. Pretty simple and effective way to set up the X-Division Title match, but there was little way around the fact that this is Impact’s version of the Money In The Bank building momentum match. I’m not sure what is happening to the title at Slammiversary, but does it matter given how the build has been going?

Post match Austin and Fulton come in for the brawl, with Josh Alexander running in for the save. That earns him a beating as well, with Chris Bey coming out to film the whole thing.

Sami Callihan is yelling at Tommy Dreamer when the interviewer comes in. They agree to be on the same team in next week’s six man. Moose comes up to say he’s in too and walks away. Apparently Dreamer won’t be on Team Dreamer and they need a third man. It’s going to be Tommy Dreamer isn’t it?

Rachael Ellering didn’t see the red flags with Jordynne Grace and she should have. Grace comes out so Ellering can talk about all of their time together and how she was at a low point when the team got together. Everyone kept telling Ellering that it would be better and now she is doing the same thing to Grace.

That isn’t what Grace wanted and a good partner or friend should have known. Tenille Dashwood is brought up and Grace cuts her off, saying she had a career before Ellering showed up. She loved having Ellering as a partner but she can do things on her own. Ellering brings up Dashwood again, drawing a threat from Grace.

Cue Jazz to say this is just a hurdle and they can get this together. Ellering is willing but Grace needs some more time. Grace storms off and here are Kaleb With A K and Tenille Dashwood to interrupt. She offers to be Ellering’s partner again but Ellering says no. They can have a match instead so the brawl is on, with Jazz and Ellering cleaning house. As mentioned last week: THEY WERE A TEAM FOR TWO MONTHS!!! STOP ACTING LIKE IT IS SOME BIG EPIC HISTORY!!!

Jake Something vs. Sam Beale

Brian Myers is here with Beale. Jake knocks him down to start and hits the running shoulder but stops to glare at Myers. Beale bails outside and comes back in with a high crossbody, which Jake pulls out of the air. Myers throws in a chair, which is kicked right back out. The Black Hole Slam finishes Beale at 2:22.

Post match Myers says Beale didn’t lose that, because he gets a lesson: never be like Jake Something.

Rich Swann and Willie Mack wish Eddie Edwards and Satoshi Kojima luck in their Tag Team Title shot. Edwards appreciates that and promises them the first shot.

Tag Team Titles: Satoshi Kojima/Eddie Edwards vs. Violent By Design

Deaner and Joe Doering are defending for Violent By Design, all of whom are here. Eddie and Doering start things off, with Eddie being sent into the corner in a hurry. Kojima comes in to take Deaner down by the arm and we take an early break. Back with Deaner getting double elbowed down but a Doering distraction lets Kojima hammer away. The champs take turns on Kojima in the corner, setting up Doering’s standing chinlock.

Doering can’t suplex him though and Kojima manages one of his own. Eddie comes in off the hot tag to start cleaning house but Doering breaks up the tiger driver. The champs get knocked to the floor for the stereo dives and we take a break. Back with a Rhino distraction letting Deaner grab a powerbomb out of the corner for two.

Deaner puts on a chinlock, followed by some standard choking in the corner. Doering comes in for a big boot but Deaner’s suplex is countered into a belly to back suplex. The hot tag brings in Kojima to clean house and the top rope elbow gets two on Deaner. A running neckbreaker drops Kojima but Deaner misses a middle rope headbutt.

Doering runs Eddie over with a high crossbody and now the top rope headbutt can connect for two. Everything breaks down with Doering hitting a double clothesline but the Koji Cutter drops the monster. The Boston Knee Party is countered into the revolution powerbomb though and Eddie is done at 19:13.

Rating: B-. This took some time to get going but I was rather surprised by how well this combination of Violent By Design held up. Doering and Deaner sounds like the lowest level of a team as you could have here but it worked out well. There wasn’t much of a chance of a title change as Kojima is just visiting, but at least they had a good match out of these four.

Overall Rating: C+. As usual, this was a bunch of stuff thrown together without one big thing to focus on, but this was better than the usual stuff. Slammiversary is starting to look good and if they do it right, we should be in for a heck of a show. What we got here worked pretty well for about an hour and a half though and I’ll take that over what we get from Impact most of the time.

Results
Rosemary b. Kiera Hogan – As Above So Below
Deonna Purrazzo b. Susan – Fujiwara armbar
Rohit Raju/Shera b. Trey Miguel/Petey Williams – Drive By to Williams
Jake Something b. Sam Beale – Black Hole Slam
Violent By Design b. Eddie Edwards/Satoshi Kojima – Revolution powerbomb to Edwards

 

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Impact Wrestling – June 17, 2021: Who Needs Jokes?

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 17, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo Brown

We are done with Against All Odds and the big story is Kenny Omega retaining the World Title over Moose, with Sami Callihan appearing after the match. Don Callis fired Callihan, which seems like it could be quite the story on the road to Slammiversary. There is about a month to go before the show and that means there is time to set things up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Don Callis and Kenny Omega taking over the company (yes, a story about someone taking over Impact Wrestling) and people getting worried about it. Omega retained the title over Moose at Against All Odds but almost got taken out by Sami Callihan. Callis interrupted it and fired Callihan, sending things even further into chaos.

Moose comes up to Scott D’Amore and says he got screwed out of the title at Against All Odds and wants a rematch. D’Amore is too worried about an Anthem representation showing up here to deal with things, because that has never been done before. It’s going to be Tommy Dreamer isn’t it? Anyway Moose promises to make D’Amore pay attention.

TJP vs. Black Taurus

Fallah Bahh and Decay are here too. TJP avoids a charge in the corner to start and snaps off some armdrags into an early standoff. A headbutt puts TJP down for a change and the chinlock goes on in a hurry. Taurus hits a pumphandle backbreaker for two and it’s time to crank on both arms for a bit.

Something like a torture rack dropped into a backbreaker gets two as Josh rapid fires the results from Against All Odds. TJP manages a hurricanrana into an atomic drop as the pace picks up, including a running boot in the corner to rock Taurus again. There’s a tornado DDT to send Taurus bailing to the floor, allowing TJP to hit the dive (which knocks Bahh down as well). Back in and the Mamba Splash finishes Taurus at 6:04.

Rating: C. I like both guys so this was a fun match to see, though it’s kind of sad to see Taurus fall down pretty hard in a hurry. He wasn’t exactly a main eventer, but he also wasn’t a guy losing in a six minute opener on TV. TJP winning is nice to see though, as he gets to rebound after the Iron Man loss.

Post match Moose grabs a chair and says this show is being hijacked until Scott D’Amore makes time for him. Security guards come out but Moose says none of them are Scott. Cue the returning Chris Sabin to clear Moose (who injured him) out and Moose bails. That was a pretty lame hijacking.

Rohit Raju rants to Ace Austin and Madman Fulton about Ultimate X returning at Slammiversary. An alliance seems to be made.

Chris Sabin doesn’t like Moose and the challenge is on for Slammiversary.

Commentary recaps Callis/Callihan/D’Amore/Anthem.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Madman Fulton vs. Josh Alexander

Non-title and Ace Austin is in Fulton’s corner. Fulton powers Alexander around to start and hits the early toss suplex. Alexander gets pulled outside for a drop onto the apron and a big boot as we take a break. Back with Fulton hitting Snake Eyes to set up a claw STO for two. Austin gets in a cheap shot on the apron but Alexander stops a charging Fulton with a boot to the face. A middle rope knee to the knee to the head sets up a roaring elbow to rock Fulton again. The Jay Driller gives Alexander the pin at 9:36.

Rating: C+. Alexander continues to look good in almost everything he does and it would not surprise me to see him drop the title in Ultimate X so he can move up towards the main event. I’m not sure if that is a move that needs to happen immediately or not, but Alexander seems like he is ready for at least some kind of an upgrade. Fulton is still good as the monster, but he can’t take too many losses like this one. It’s just not good monster behavior.

Post match Ace Austin comes in for the beatdown but Petey Williams makes the save. Rohit Raju, Trey Miguel and Shera come out in a row, with Shera cleaning house so the villains can stand tall.

Deonna Purrazzo yells at Kimber Lee and Susan because they keep failing. Susan says she wouldn’t be champion without them so Purrazzo walks off. Susan: “Ungrateful degenerate millennial!”

W. Morrissey thinks everyone around here is dumb enough to think they have friends. Everyone will stab you in the back and the only person you can trust is yourself.

Steve Maclin vs. Jason Page

Maclin is formerly known as Steve Cutler. Chops and a back elbow have Page in early trouble and Maclin drops him stomach first across the top rope. Page’s right hands just earn him a clothesline and some elbows keep him in trouble. A reverse sitout Edgecution (cool) finishes Page at 1:54. Total squash and Maclin was fairly impressive.

Rachael Ellering talks to Jordynne Grace about how rough things have been as of late. Grace doesn’t want to hear it though and the team seems to be done. This is the latest example of a common problem in tag team wrestling: trying to make it a big deal when a team who hasn’t even been together for two months splits up. These two had their first match together on April 25. If they’re done, it really isn’t a big deal whatsoever.

Don Callis explains that he and Scott D’Amore are like brothers who happen to fight from time to time. He had to do the heavy lifting that D’Amore can’t do, like firing Callihan. They’ve talked about doing it a hundred times but D’Amore couldn’t bring himself to do it. Callis expects the Anthem representative to bring gifts because he did what should have been done a long time ago.

Tenille Dashwood vs. Rachael Ellering

Kaleb With A K is here with Dashwood, who offers Ellering a shirt with the two of them together. That’s tossed to the floor and we’re ready to go. Ellering works on a wristlock to start and puts Dashwood on the mat to stay on the arm. A front facelock keeps Dashwood down and it’s right back to the armbar. Dashwood switches into a headscissors, which is countered straight into a chinlock.

Back up and a running shoulder drops Dashwood and a running clothesline hits her in the corner. Kaleb With A K grabs the foot though and Dashwood finally gets in a few shots of her own. Dashwood sends her outside for a chop, with Kaleb With A K getting in a quick photo. A hard whip sends Ellering into the barricade and a high crossbody gives Dashwood two back inside.

Ellering manages a suplex into a Sling Blade to start the comeback and there’s a backsplash for two. Dashwood hits a heck of a clothesline for two more but Ellering plants her with a spinebuster. Back up and Dashwood talks a bit too much trash, causing Ellering to hammer her into the corner. A middle rope spinning legdrop connects but Kaleb With A K offers a distraction, allowing Dashwood to crucifix her for the pin at 15:21.

Rating: C. This was a bit longer than it needed to be but they were hardly having a bad match. Dashwood winning off of the distraction makes sense as Ellering doesn’t have anyone watching her back with Grace gone. Neither of them are exactly on fire at the moment but Dashwood is at least starting to string some wins together. I’m sure we’ll get more on Grace vs. Ellering though, all those weeks after they teamed up in the first place.

TJP and Fallah Bahh try to talk to Scott D’Amore but Decay interrupt. They aren’t happy with the result from earlier so a tag match is set up.

Fire N Flava brag about retaining the Knockouts Tag Team Titles and go ask a janitor if he knows who they are. This doesn’t go well for the janitor so they go off to a guy pushing a big barrel of trash bags. Rosemary comes up to get on them for being mean and here is Havok to throw Kiera Hogan inside. One of the black trash bags says MICKIE and I think we have foreshadowing.

Flashback Moment Of The Week: Chris Sabin b. Bully Ray to win the World Title at Destination X 2013.

Satoshi Kojima vs. Rhino

If Kojima wins, he and Eddie Edwards get a Tag Team Title match. Therefore, Violent By Design and Edwards are here too. Rhino shoves him down to start and a shoulder drops Kojima again. Back up and Kojima’s forearms don’t have much effect as Rhino puts him down with another shoulder. Another set of forearms into an elbow finally put Rhino down and we take an early break.

Back with Rhino knocking him down again and getting two off an elbow to the face. The neck crank goes on but Kojima fights up to send Rhino into the corner. A running forearm gives Kojima two and a DDT drops Rhino again. The Koji Cutter is countered into a belly to belly but Kojima is right back up. Now the Koji Cutter can connect and the lariat is enough to finish Rhino at 10:43.

Rating: C-. This was a lot of hitting each other in the face and that wasn’t exactly the most interesting deal. Kojima picked it up a bit near the end but the lack of drama didn’t help things either. I’ve seen Kojima have some good matches so it isn’t him, but there is only so much that you can do under these circumstances.

Commentary goes for their preview for next week but here is Sami Callihan in the ring to demand Don Callis and Scott D’Amore get out here right now. Post break, security is trying to get rid of him but D’Amore comes out to say he is here to fix things. The Anthem representative is here and can do something about it, but Sami is kind of proving Callis’ point. Callihan storms off and here is Callis to say he fired Callihan for D’Amore. They are too smart to be wrestling anymore and Callis fired Callihan because D’Amore wouldn’t do it.

D’Amore loses it……and it really is Tommy freaking Dreamer. You know…..it’s not even a joke anymore. D’Amore and Callis say this isn’t a good time but Dreamer says that he’s here on Anthem’s behalf. Callihan is back and someone else has to be fired. D’Amore freaks out but Callis is the one being fired. Callis goes on a crazed rant and calls D’Amore a Bruce Prichard stooge. Dreamer: “There’s a trash bag in the back waiting on you.”

Callis goes to the back and runs into Callihan, who promises to bash Kenny Omega’s head in.

Overall Rating: C-. Not much of a show here other than the big ending, which more or less erased the big angle from Against All Odds and got rid of Callis. Throw in Tommy Dreamer actually being the representative at the end, which had me pausing the video and rubbing my eyes, and this wasn’t exactly a huge show. Slammiversary is coming though, including the arrivals of a bunch of people, including the Mickie James tease. Things are going to pick up in the future, but this was just kind of there for the most part.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – June 10, 2021: That’s A Hard One To Do

Impact Wrestling
Date: June 10, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Lo Brown

It’s the go home show for Against All Odds and that means it is time to focus on Moose vs. Kenny Omega for the World Title. Other than that though, we could use some build for the rest of the car. The rest of the card could use some attention of its own and odds are we might get that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Scott D’Amore is in the ring and brings in AEW owner Tony Khan. Tony thanks him for the welcome but here is Don Callis to join them with the smug starting fast. Callis knows that Kenny Omega is the greatest investment in Khan’s portfolio but there has been talk of Sami Callihan being involved in the title match with Moose. Callihan is blackballed all over this country but D’Amore brings up the Good Brothers interfering and causing chaos all over the place too.

Callis doesn’t go for it, instead talking about how Callihan is such a problem for the wrestling business. D’Amore says Moose vs. Omega will headline Against All Odds and Khan says they can have the match at Daily’s Place in Jacksonville, Florida. That’s cool with Callis, but D’Amore says that the winner can face Callihan at Slammiversary. This is NOT cool with Callis but the music is already playing. They got the point over here pretty clearly so well done.

Commentary goes over what we just heard.

Here is what is coming tonight and at Against All Odds.

The Elite isn’t happy so they talk about putting a bounty on Sami Callihan. Scott D’Amore comes in to say instead of that, we can have the Good Brothers vs. Callihan/any partner in a street fight at Against All Odds (it’s going to be Tommy Dreamer). Callis mentions murder as a solution.

Brian Myers teaches Sam Beale about how to cut a promo. This turns into Beale praising Matt Cardona in a mock promo but Myers yells at him a lot.

Sami Callihan interrupts Scott D’Amore to rant about the tag match. He doesn’t know who he’ll get as a partner…and here’s Tommy Dreamer. I WASN’T BEING SERIOUS PEOPLE!!! Dreamer has been against all odds his entire career and since they both hate Don Callis, he’ll be the partner. And yeah Callihan will probably turn on him because everyone else does. Callihan says deal and promises to beat Dreamer up if he messes things up. D’Amore reminds Dreamer that he is his boss, but Dreamer doesn’t seem too impressed.

Rosemary vs. Havok

If Havok wins, she is added to the Against All Odds Knockouts Title match. Rosemary wastes no time in hitting a pair of spears for two. Some right hands have Havok in more trouble and something like a Last Chancery makes it worse. Havok finally gets up and powers her into the corner, setting up the hip attack. We take a break and come back with Havok grabbing a full nelson. That’s broken up in a hurry and Rosemary nails a spear for two. Back up and Havok misses a big swing, allowing Rosemary to hit a fourth spear for the pin at 4:17.

Rating: D+. Well that happened. This was little more than a squash outside of that full nelson. Rosemary shrugged off what Havok did to her and hit four spears for the pin. The stipulation was a bit unnecessary but it did a nice job of making Rosemary look like a bigger threat to Purrazzo before their title match.

Post match Rosemary and Havok look at each other but Deonna Purrazzo, Kimber Lee and Susan come out to beat both of them down. Purrazzo and Lee grab holds so Susan grabs the mic….and wants Tasha Steelz out here to face Lee RIGHT NOW. Sure.

Tasha Steelz vs. Kimber Lee

Kiera Hogan is here in Steelz’s corner. Steelz starts fast with a dropkick into the corner but a springboard hurricanrana is countered into a buckle bomb. Lee hammers away on the mat and we hit the reverse chinlock. Some choking in the corner keeps Steelz down and Lee tosses her outside in a heap. Back in and Lee grabs a side slam for two as Hogan starts yelling again. Some rolling suplexes into a delayed suplex gets two on Steelz but a Swanton only hits knees. Lee misses a spinwheel kick and gets caught in a spinning Falcon Arrow for the pin at 5:46.

Rating: C-. Lee got to showcase herself a bit here and the match was fine enough considering the circumstances. Fire N Flava are desperately in need of challengers and at least Lee and Susan are a fresh team. I’m not exactly expecting a title change, but it should be a good enough match given who is in there.

Another brawl breaks out post match, with Rosemary and Havok coming in to clean house. Hogan, after being caught by Rosemary: “H*** no!” Hogan, after turning around to see Havok: “D***!” A double chokeslam leaves Hogan laying and a triple threat seems likely.

Steve Maclin talks about everything he has gone through and his back is against the wall again. I’m moderately intrigued by this.

Josh Alexander waited for sixteen years to have a chance like he had last week. Now he’s looking forward to the five way #1 contenders match but here are Ace Austin and Madman Fulton to interrupt. Austin says watch the tag match tonight, but he is the only person Alexander has to watch out for.

Petey Williams/Trey Miguel vs. Chris Bey/Rohit Raju

Williams fights out of a headlock to start and hits a dropkick to the back. The Sharpshooter goes on in a hurry but Raju is in the ropes just as fast. Bey and Trey come in to pick up the pace, but neither can actually hit anything. Miguel kicks him in the ropes so it’s back to Williams for two off a double backbreaker. Bey offers a distraction though and Raju knocks Williams outside. A sitout gordbuster gets two on Williams and it’s back to Bey for a knee in the corner.

Williams can’t fight out of the corner as Raju cuts him off with a belly to back suplex. Bey gets shoved into Raju and the hot tag brings in Miguel to pick up the pace all over again. An Indian Deathlock has Bey down and Miguel adds a northern lights suplex for two on Raju at the same time. A snap German suplex drops Raju again as Williams and Bey fight to the floor. That leaves Miguel to kick away at Raju, who comes back with a jumping knee to the face. Williams is back in with his slingshot Codebreaker though and the Hourglass makes Raju tap at 7:24.

Rating: B-. This is what you’re looking for in the X-Division and it worked here too. They didn’t bother trying to build anything up and the whole match was all about one spot after another. There was a nice section in the middle with Williams having to fight his way out of the corner but this was all about the fast pace and it worked well.

Post match here are Ace Austin and Madman Fulton to wreck Miguel and Williams. Josh Alexander comes in and it’s a huge brawl, with Williams hitting a super Canadian Destroyer to knock Fulton silly (ok that was cool).

Willie Mack is ready to beat up W. Morrissey in a No DQ match tonight. Rich Swann wants Swann to save a piece for him on Sunday. Mack says cool, but he wants to do this on his own tonight, which is cool with Swann.

It’s time for All About Me with Tenille Dashwood, with Rachael Ellering getting to ask the questions this week. Jordynne Grace is here too though because she is Ellering’s partner and they do things together. Kaleb With A K pulls out a shirt, which Grace doesn’t approve of, but it’s for Tenille instead. Rachael is getting a bit sick of this because it’s disrespectful to the two of them. Grace challenges Tenille for Against All Odds and is off to get the match made before she can give an answer.

We look at Crazzy Steve beating Deaner on Before The Impact.

Violent By Design is ready for the Tag Team Title match at Against All Odds. Eric Young tells Deaner to not disappoint him and Deaner looks scared. Tonight, Joe Doering is ready for Eddie Edwards because he wants to take out Impact’s heart.

Joe Doering vs. Eddie Edwards

Violent By Design is here with Doering but Eddie is on his own. Doering shoves him down without much trouble to start and then hits a hard running shoulder. The neck crank goes on early and Doering elbows Eddie in the face for two. Eddie manages to muscle Doering up for a suplex and a low bridge puts the monster on the floor. That’s enough though as Deaner comes in for the DQ at 3:47.

Rating: C-. I could go for watching Eddie every week but Doering is just a boring monster. He plays his role well enough but it’s not like we’ve ever been given anything to make us care about him. The stable needs someone like him though and having him dominate a legend like Eddie made sense. Keeping it short was a good idea, but it wasn’t exactly much to see.

Post match the beating is on but Satoshi Kojima comes in for the brawl with Doering. The good guys clear the ring to stand tall.

Video on Moose vs. Kenny Omega, focusing on Moose wanting the elusive World Title.

The announcers talk about the World Title match.

Against All Odds rundown.

W. Morrissey vs. Willie Mack

No DQ. Morrissey powers him into the corner for a variety of choking to start and a knee to the ribs. Brown calls it a kitchen sink and actually EXPLAINS THE NAME OF THE MOVE, saying it’s like everything has been thrown at you, even the kitchen sink. Fair enough. Mack gets knocked down again and we take an early break. Back with Morrissey choking on the floor but Mack sends him into the steps.

Mack finds a chain for a shot to the leg and ribs, followed by a chair to the back. They head inside with Mack hitting a running splash in the corner, setting up the Cannonball. Morrissey is right back up with a big boot and it’s time to chair Mack in the back a few times. The chain is wrapped around Mack’s eyes and then underneath his nose to make it….worse? Maybe?

Some more chair shots to the back have Mack down again and Morrissey uses said chair to choke him in the corner. A big splash misses though and Mack kicks him in the head. There’s the standing moonsault for two and Mack gets in his own chair shots to the back. The Six Star only hits chair but so does Morrissey’s elbow. Back up and Morrissey kicks the chair into Mack’s face for the pin at 14:09.

Rating: C. This was a good way to make Morrissey look like a monster but it wasn’t exactly getting to a higher level. Instead, we got a bunch of chair shots and some chain stuff, which was only so interesting. Morrissey taking out Mack again does set him up for Rich Swann though, and that’s the idea here. Just fine a more interesting way to do it.

Post match Morrissey goes after Mack again but Swann runs in for the save. Security keeps them apart but Swann manages a chair shot to send him outside. A lot of staring ends as Josh rapid fire plugs Against All Odds to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling itself ranged from pretty good to not so great, but they accomplished their goal of setting up Against All Odds. That’s actually a heck of a trick given how it feels like little more than a stepping stone on the way to Slammiversary. We got a nice enough go home show here though, even if you don’t really need to see anything here.

Results

Rosemary b. Havok – Spear

Tasha Steelz b. Kimber Lee – Spinning Falcon Arrow

Trey Miguel/Petey Williams b. Rohit Raju/Chris Bey – Hourglass to Raju

Eddie Edwards b. Joe Doering via DQ when Deaner interfered

W. Morrissey b. Willie Mack – Big boot into a chair

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – May 20, 2021: Moose Awaits

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 20, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Josh Matthews

We’re done with Under Siege and that means it is time to start getting ready for Moose vs. Kenny Omega at Against All Odds. Other than that, we need to fill out the rest of the card, which is a nice feeling as these regular big shows have done a lot of good things for the way Impact works month to month. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of New Jack.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Rohit Raju vs. Jake Something

Shera is here too. Something forearms Raju outside in a hurry but the Shera showdown lets Raju get in a few cheap shots. Back in and Jake hits a hard shoulder and shouts a lot as Raju rolls outside. This time the referee checks on Raju, allowing Shera to get in a big clothesline of his own. Jake’s missed charge sends his shoulder into the chest, setting up Raju’s flying armbar for two.

A kick to the face gives Raju two more and it’s time for a standing armbar. That earns him an ax handle to the back of the head and a big right hand, followed by the running shoulder in the corner. The discus lariat gives Jake two but Raju catches him with a running big boot in the corner. Jake tries a powerbomb but Raju slips out and hits a jumping Downward Spiral. The Crossface is broken up and Jake tries a suplex, only to have Shera pull the leg so Raju can fall on top for the pin at 7:14.

Rating: C. There is still something so strange about the idea of Raju being completely competent after so many years of being one of the least tolerable wrestlers around. The ending was straight out of the 80s but the classics continue to work for a reason. Jake Something isn’t much in the way of classics, and I continue to base that entirely on his horrible name. Fix that and he’ll be fine, as the match itself here was completely watchable.

Post match Jake unloads on Shera, including a chair shot to put him down. Raju watches from the ramp as Jake puts Shera through a table.

Here is what’s coming tonight.

Taylor Wilde wants the Knockouts Title but here are Tenille Dashwood and Kaleb With A K to interrupt. Dashwood has gotten a match against Kiera Hogan tonight and that kind of a win would get them a Knockouts Tag Team Titles. Wilde again explains that they aren’t a team and STOP FACE TIMING HER.

Rachael Ellering and Jordynne Grace are upset by the loss but need to get back out there. Has Grace always been that short?

Kiera Hogan vs. Tenille Dashwood

Tasha Steelz and Kaleb With A K are here too. Hogan sends her straight into the corner to start and comes out with a butterfly suplex. That earns her a Tarantula but Steelz’s distraction….has no impact as Dashwood snaps off a neckbreaker over the middle rope. A low superkick takes Dashwood down again though and we take a break. Back with Hogan choking on the rope for two and putting on a chinlock. A superkick (which might not have connected) sends Dashwood into the ropes but she bounces back with a clothesline into a rollup to pin Hogan at 7:42.

Rating: C-. The Knockouts division outside of the singles title continues to seem like it just keeps going back and forth week to week, which isn’t the most thrilling stuff. This was more of the same, but maybe they can set up another Knockouts Tag Team Title match so a thrown together team can win the belts again. Dashwood was doing her usual stuff here, and that is not the most thrilling thing.

Post match the brawl is on with Kimber Lee, Susan and Deonna Purrazzo running in to beat on Dashwood. Taylor Wilde runs in for the failed save attempt so here’s Havok to really clear the ring.

Jordynne Grace has gotten herself and Rachael Ellering a match tonight. Against each other.

Satoshi Kojima is coming next week.

FinJuice is ready to defend their Tag Team Titles against Ace Austin/Madman Fulton later tonight and will keep the titles, as always. After that, it’s back to Japan.

VSK vs. Petey Williams

Striker gushes over what a legend Williams is, because the term legend is now the same as “guy who wrestled here a long time ago”. Williams starts fast and snaps off a hurricanrana out of the corner, followed by a toss to the floor. That means a slingshot hurricanrana to drop VSK again but he is right back in with a DDT.

VSK drops a knee for two and then slams him with an immediate splash getting two more. Williams suplexes him out of the corner and hits a basement dropkick. The spinning Russian legsweep looks to set up the Canadian Destroyer but VSK counters into an Irish Curse. Williams elbows him down though and the Destroyer finishes VSK at 5:10.

Rating: C-. This was every Williams match: a bunch of the same spots he has done for years, capped off by a move that was indeed special at one point but has become the most overplayed move in wrestling. It was nice to see VSK get in some offense here as he is being treated as more than your regular jobber. Odds are that doesn’t lead anywhere, but at least he got a chance here.

Rich Swann says he lost the World Title and he felt that loss mentally and physically. He has been watching the show week in and week out and doesn’t like what W. Morrissey has been doing to Willie Mack. Cue Morrissey to jump Swann from behind throw him out the door.

It’s off to Swinger’s Palace for some roulette, though Swinger wants to know where the coal miner’s glove match is. TJP is making some money and gives some of it back, though he stops at Fallah Bahh in a dress. He offers to reform the team with Bahh because he got jumped by Petey Williams at Under Siege. Cue Williams to issue a challenge for himself/Josh Alexander vs. TJP/Bahh. That seems to be on but here is Decay, with Rosemary saying John E. Bravo is looking better.

Here is Moose for a chat. Moose talks about how easy it was to become the #1 contender at Under Siege and now he is ready to be World Champion. Kenny Omega has beaten a lot of great wrestlers but Moose is a different kind of athlete. We hear about his NFL career and now it is time to see a clash of the titans. Moose lists off some various Greek gods….and here is Omega, with Don Callis, to interrupt.

Callis talks about how great Moose looks and thinks he might be a bit bigger than 6’5. Moose might be the most physically talented person in all of professional wrestling, but he isn’t about to coast over Omega. There is nothing sadder than wasted talent, and Moose couldn’t even win a title in RING OF HONOR. How many Super Bowls did he win? Callis asks if Moose is coasting on his talent so Moose promises to rip Callis’ head off and stick it in a certain place on Omega.

That’s too far for Omega, who says it is just one One Winged Angel to take him out. Moose offers to let him try it right now but here are the Good Brothers to interrupt. Sami Callihan appears as well and the Elite bails. As usual, Omega is weakened by talking, but thankfully he doesn’t do it very often around here.

Post break, Moose tells Callihan that he isn’t going to be thanking him. Callihan is sick of the Good Brothers and all that matters is he is coming for whoever leaves Under Siege as champion.

Rachael Ellering vs. Jordynne Grace

They shake hands to start and Grace headlocks her over. Grace has to flip out of a headscissors but is right back up with a wristlock. Ellering is right back on the arm and they fight over a battle of the wristlocks. A toss into the corner does not sit well with Grace, who is sent to the apron in a hurry. The tease of a kick to the face doesn’t sit well with Ellering and we take a break.

Back with Grace driving shoulders in the corner, setting up a basement clothesline for two. We go old school with a full nelson so Ellering drives her into the corner three times in a row for the break. Grace hits some clotheslines but Ellering elbows her in the face. The running backsplash gives Ellering two but Grace is right back with some running knees in the corner. Grace’s fireman’s carry is countered into a sunset flip, setting off a pinfall reversal sequence with Ellering getting the pin at 11:02.

Rating: C. The power stuff was good here, but I really hope that I’m not supposed to think it’s a major showdown when these two teamed together like three times. Just making a team and then having them fight isn’t interesting, as they have barely been a team in the first place. Ellering getting the win should give her a bit of a boost, though Grace doesn’t need to be losing again.

Respect is shown post match but Grace doesn’t seem happy.

Brian Myers says everything he has said is justified. Matt Cardona walks by and Myers beats him down.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Tag Team Titles: FinJuice vs. Ace Austin/Madman Fulton

Austin and Fulton are challenging after becoming #1 contenders at Under Siege. Finlay starts with Austin, who tags out to Fulton less than fifteen seconds in. Fulton powers his way out of a headlock and it’s off to Robinson to hammer away at the monster. Fulton runs him over without much trouble but Robinson grabs the arm and brings Finlay back in with an ax handle. Finlay is sent hard into the corner though and now Austin is willing to come in and…get taken down almost immediately.

It’s back to Robinson for a backsplash and a double flapjack into a double dropkick puts Fulton on the floor. Back from a break with Robinson in trouble (thanks to a chokeslam to send his arm into the barricade) as Austin works on a hammerlock. The paper cut on the finger makes it even worse and the armbar goes on again. A jumping knee to the face gives Robinson a breather but Austin takes Finlay off the apron to be smart.

That means Robinson’s backdrop doesn’t mean a tag but Austin’s rather dumb drop toehold into the corner lets Finlay come in. House is cleaned in a hurry and a Rock Bottom backbreaker gets two on Austin. A fireman’s carry/running kick to the face takes Austin down for the same as everything breaks down. Robinson’s snap jabs to Fulton set up a quickly escaped fireman’s carry, with Fulton hitting a tilt-a-whirl powerslam.

Austin hits a springboard spinning kick to the face with Fulton adding a belly to back suplex for two more. A chokeslam/top rope Fold combination (cool/hard to pull off) gets two more as Finlay has to make the save this time. Everything breaks down again and Robinson superplexes Austin down. There’s an assisted Cannonball to Fulton but he is way too big for the Doomsday Device. Instead the Unprettier finishes Fulton for the pin to retain at 15:54.

Rating: B. This was a good and long title match with Fulton playing the monster role well. He and Austin are a solid pairing and I’m a bit surprised that Fulton took the fall here. That being said, I would rather he take it than Austin, who could be a main event star here at the drop of a hat. Good main event here, as FinJuice is growing on me despite half of their personalities being talking about Japan.

Post match….here’s Violent By Design to surround FinJuice. Eric Young hands over Rhino’s Call Your Shot trophy and it’s time for another title match.

Tag Team Titles: FinJuice vs. Violent By Design

Violent By Design, with Rhino and Joe Doering in this case, are challenging and the brawl is on in a hurry. Doering crossbodies the champs down and hits an AA on Robinson. One heck of a lariat is enough for the pin and the titles at 49 seconds. I don’t care about the team, but if they’re going to mean something, they needed a win like this.

We get another Slammiversary ad with hints about wrestlers coming. The word YES, the letters II and the word FORGOTTEN can be seen this time.

Overall Rating: C. The main event helped a bit but that was about the only really good part of the show. This felt like a lot of quick ideas which weren’t all that interesting, including Grace vs. Ellering and Williams’ latest reheating. It’s all going to be about Moose vs. Omega sooner than later though, and the Slammiversary reveals are likely to shake things up again. Now just have some better TV on the way.

Results

Rohit Raju b. Jake Something – Suplex reversed into a cover

Tenille Dashwood b. Kiera Hogan – Rollup

Petey Williams b. VSK – Canadian Destroyer

Rachael Ellering b. Jordynne Grace – Sunset flip

FinJuice b. Ace Austin/Madman Fulton – Unprettier to Fulton

Violent By Design b. FinJuice – Lariat to Robinson

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling Hardcore Justice 2021: Call It A Wrestlemania Surprise

Hardcore Justice 2021
Date: April 10, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

It’s the Impact Wrestling Wrestlemania weekend offering with the hardcore themed show, as operated by Tommy Dreamer. Now for once this actually makes sense, though somehow Dreamer is likely to be main eventing the show as well. The card looks decent and has been built up on Impact as of late, so it feels like an actually pay per view. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features Eric Young talking about how he has a sickness and violence is the only cure. Tommy Dreamer has that same sickness and tonight, Young is willing to provide the cure for him.

Ace Austin/Madman Fulton vs. TJP/Fallah Bahh vs. Josh Alexander/Petey Williams

Austin, TJP and Alexander are feuding over the X-Division Title and got to pick their own partners. Alexander gets run over by the huge Bahh to start, including getting knocked to the floor. Back in and Bahh strikes away but Alexander takes him down by the leg. Williams comes in but gets knocked into the corner by TJP. A drop toehold lets Williams hit a dropkick to the back, only to get pulled into TJP’s Octopus variation. It’s off to Austin, who is taken down for a nasty arm crank from TJP.

Bahh comes back in and gets caught in the corner for some shoulders from Fulton. Some double teaming sets up a running crossbody to Bahh’s kneeling back for two but Bahh backdrops his way to freedom. Williams tags himself in to take over on Austin and it’s back to Alexander for a quick German suplex. A blind tag brings Fulton back in to side slam Alexander for two and a big boot lets Austin come back in.

Austin’s spinning legdrop gets two but Alexander pops back up with a powerslam. Austin kicks him into the corner for the hot tag to TJP and the pace picks up. There’s a tornado DDT to Austin and everything breaks down. Bahh crossbodies Fulton down and the Mamba Splash hits Austin but Alexander tags himself in to steal the near fall. Williams Sharpshooters Austin and Alexander ankle locks Fulton but TJP grabs a choke on Williams at the same time.

Bahh breaks the whole thing up and it’s Fulton having to save Austin from the Canadian Destroyer. Everything breaks down again and Fulton cleans house with everyone going down. TJP knocks Alexander into the corner for a facewash and the Canadian Destroyer hits TJP. Williams stomps on Bahh’s ankle and Alexander ankle locks him for the tap at 13:41.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it should have been with a hot opener featuring some talented people. The Canadian Destroyer may have become one of the biggest jokes in wrestling but there is still a little something special about Williams using it. This was all about the main trio though and they could tear the house down at Rebellion. Good stuff here and they’re off to a solid start.

Here’s what’s coming today.

Hernandez vs. Shera

This is a chairs match dubbed Chairly Legal. Dang it why do I have to love puns? The exchange of shoulders goes to Shera and he hammers away in the corner. Hernandez gets in a shot of his own though and the first chair shot goes over Shera’s back. Some chairs are set up at ringside but Hernandez spends too much time on the building, allowing Shera to chair him down. Back in and Hernandez gets in a chair shot of his own and wedges some chairs in the corner.

Shera goes face first into a chair in the middle of the ring for two and the big ax handles keep him down. A quick spinebuster gives Shera two and they head outside with Hernandez taking over again. Some chairs are thrown in and Shera manages to superplex him onto the pile for two. Hernandez is right back up with chair shots of his own but here is Rohit Raju to blast Hernandez with a chair. A confused Shera gets the pin at 9:01.

Rating: C. Another not too bad match here with Shera getting a lot better, mainly due to not having everything focused on some stupid dance. The chairs were the focal point here and they didn’t go outside of that, which made enough sense for a one off match like this. Hernandez is fine in this role and that is all he needs to be. Not a great match but it fit in well on a show like this one.

We go to Swinger’s Palace where Chris Sabin and James Storm aren’t happy with being told to take the night off. XXXL comes in and can’t get a seat so a match is set up for…well actually one isn’t because XXXL gets to sit down. Matt Cardona comes in to ask what the deal is around here. He says Swinger has been in wrestling for 150 years so here is Dreamer to it’s MATCH TIME. This isn’t Wrestle House….but Dreamer is in charge so we’re having Cardona vs. Swinger in a Crate American Bash.

Doc Gallows vs. Black Taurus

Karl Anderson and Crazzy Steve are here too. Taurus hammers away to start but misses a crossbody, allowing Gallows to hit a clothesline to take over. Gallows knocks him down again and hammers away, including an uppercut to cut off a comeback attempt. A suplex sets up a chinlock for a bit before a trip to the floor.

Taurus is sent over the barricade and we head back inside for another chinlock. With that broken up, Gallows hits a bit boot but Taurus fights up with a shot to the ace. A top rope clothesline sets up a 619 into a missile dropkick for two on Gallows. Anderson offers a distraction though and it’s a superkick into a chokebomb to finish Taurus at 9:01.

Rating: D+. This was mostly a squash until Taurus had a nice comeback. I like Taurus a good bit but there is no way he should be beating Gallows here. That being said, there is only so much that can be done when Gallows isn’t exactly giving him much throughout the match. The Brothers are not exactly my favorite people in Impact and this didn’t do much to change that idea.

Violent By Design is ready to cure Tommy Dreamer and company.

Matt Cardona vs. Johnny Swinger

Crate American Bash, meaning there is a crate at every corner with something inside to use. Swinger, with the Swingerellas, gets rolled up to start and lies about the tights being pulled. Back up and Swinger hits a strut but needs to hide in the ropes, allowing Cardona to do his own strut, which will always work. Some forearms to the back set up a Paul Orndorff elbow on Cardona and it’s time to grab the first crate. Inside….is a framed photo of Scott Hall, which is a call back to the WCW version of this match because reasons.

Swinger knocks him off the apron and into the barricade for a breather. Back in and Swinger goes for the second crate but Cardona takes him down with a jawbreaker. Swinger pulls him off the ropes though and opens the second crate to find…a rat trap. Ok that was funny. Cardona gets his knees up in the corner and adds the middle rope dropkick.

Back up and a collision gives us another double knockdown but Cardona is up first. The third crate has….something Cardona likes but he doesn’t pull it out. Swinger gets the other crate and finds some brass knuckles for a big smile. That’s about it for the smiling though as he charges into Radio Silence for the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C-. Total comedy match here and there is nothing wrong with that. Swinger is someone who has gone from a complete groan to one of the more entertaining things about Impact Wrestling, which has been a great surprise. I’m guessing the third crate has some kind of toy or action figure inside, which would be appropriate for the match, though it does make me wonder why Dreamer had these things sitting around. Anyway, this was fine.

Cardona takes the third crate with him.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Rob Van Dam vs. Sabu at Hardcore Justice 2010. You need this on a taped pay per view? This eats up nearly ten minutes.

XXXL is having trouble keeping up with James Storm and Chris Sabin’s drinking.

Here is Sami Callihan to say he tries to help people, including Trey Miguel. It worked last week and under his mentoring, Miguel could reach the next level. Passion is about taking what you want and since Sami wants to be on Hardcore Justice, he is going to be on Hardcore Justice. The open challenge is on.

Sami Callihan vs. Sam Beale

Beale is Miguel’s student and Sami runs him over to start. Sami offers him a free shot and then knocks Beale down again. Beale’s face is rubbed into the mat and Sami bites him a bit before taking it outside. Some right hands have little effect on Sami, who snaps off a t-bone suplex to drop Beale again. Back in and Beale rolls him up for two so Sami nails a hard clothesline. The package piledriver finishes Beale at 4:05.

Rating: D+. This was a storyline advancement rather than a match and while I’m not a fan of the angle, it’s not like they spent a lot of time on it. Sami messing with Trey is either going to result in a big match at Rebellion or them being the Tag Team Champions. Neither is overly appealing but PLEASE DON’T MAKE THEM A REGULAR TEAM! Just let them fight and be done with it already.

We recap Brian Myers damaging Matt Cardona’s eye Jake Something’s eye. Therefore, it’s a hardcore blindfold match.

Brian Myers vs. Jake Something

Striker: “Look up the last time someone named Jake was in a blindfold match.” Good grief. They’re both blindfolded and there are weapons at ringside. Myers gets knocked outside early on and finds a trashcan lid to take Something down. In a smart move, Myers grabs him by the wrist and then finds another weapon to hit him in the head. They head back inside with Myers dropping him again and covering, albeit with Jake on his stomach.

Back up and Jake manages a sitout powerbomb, followed by some Scott Hall style shoulders while holding Myers’ wrist. Myers manages to find the referee and send him into Jake. The knockdown allows Myers to pull up the mask and hit a low superkick, which draws out Cardona with the third crate. Cardona slaps the mat for a distraction and slides Jake the crate. A shot to the head knocks Myers out and opens the crate, revealing a bunch of action figures. Jake hits a Boss Man Slam for the pin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. Another match that wasn’t supposed to be anything more than a fun idea that advanced a bigger story. In that regard it worked out well and it isn’t like this is going to be anything more than that. Cardona vs. Myers is slowly growing on me and as long as it doesn’t get treated as anything overly serious, it should work out well. Now give Jake a new last name and everything gets better.

Tommy Dreamer and his team (Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Eddie Edwards) are ready for Violent By Design.

Rosemary vs. Alisha vs. Havok vs. Jordynne Grace vs. Susan vs. Tenille Dashwood

Weapons match and the winner gets a Knockouts Title shot at Rebellion. Actually hold on as Su Yung comes out to attack Susan and we have a replacement. Yung is too much for Dashwood, who runs off rather than deal with her. Grace hammers on Alisha in the corner while Rosemary and Havok knock Young outside. That team lasts all of three seconds before they knock each other to the floor. Dashwood grabs Grace’s leg so the chase is on, meaning Kaleb With A K almost hits Dashwood with a frying pan by mistake.

It’s time for the staple gun and Kaleb With A K takes the shot to save Dashwood. That leaves Havok to legdrop Alisha for two with Grace making the save. The big staredown goes to Grace, who cuts off Alisha’s try with a trashcan. Grace plants Alisha for two with Yung making the save this time as you can see Susan being taken to the back (only took the referees the better part of ten minutes to help her). Yung beats on Grace until Havok comes in with a noose to take her down. Rosemary gets the Upside Down on Grace and it’s time for little red bag of thumbtacks.

Alisha hits something like a reverse DDT to drive Rosemary into them before whipping out a kendo stick (which is dubbed Kendra). Yung gives Alisha the Mandible Claw to cut that off and drag her away, which can’t end well. Havok and Grace slug it out with Havok knocking her down (allowing Striker to get in the always wrong “they’re all the same height on the mat”) and going up. Cue Nevaeh to throw powder in Havok’s eyes though and Kaleb With A K adds a superkick. Grace is back up with a Vader Bomb to Havok but Dashwood comes in and steals the pin at 9:43.

Rating: C-. This started to drag a bit in the middle but Dashwood winning actually surprised me. It is nice to see her FINALLY moving up as she has every tool imaginable but for some reason nothing has clicked yet. The weapons were a pretty minor part here but hopefully this leads to Yung returning full time. Susan isn’t working so give us what works better for a change. Not much of a match, but the right person won.

XXXL is very drunk but still want their match. James Storm says it’s time…..to play beer pong apparently. Chris Sabin throws the ball at the cup and knocks it off the table, so Larry D. offers to show him how it’s done. This misses completely, with Swinger dubbing him Knuckleball Schwartz. Storm throws a ball at Larry and the fight is on with Storm and Sabin standing tall, allowing Storm to drop a ball in the cup for the win. Swinger panics because he forgot to pay for his insurance.

Deonna Purrazzo talks about how important Jazz is but her time has passed. Tonight Purrazzo will prove that and it is title vs. career.

Knockouts Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jazz

Jazz is challenging with her career on the line. An early spinwheel kick gives Jazz two and she starts in on the arm. That’s fine with Purrazzo, who catches her with an arm snap across the top rope. The armbar is on but Jazz gets in an elbow to the face, only to get pulled into a Downward Spiral for two. Purrazzo stays on the arm and ties Jazz’s limbs around the bottom rope for a change of pace. Some kicks put Jazz on the floor so she has to pull herself back in, allowing Purrazzo to stomp away some more.

They head outside with Purrazzo hammering away until Jazz runs her over. It’s time to throw in some weapons and they head inside again, with Jazz nailing the snap jabs. An X Factor gets two but Purrazzo goes after the arm again to take over. The title is brought in but Purrazzo pulls it away and chairs her down. A DDT onto the chair gives Jazz two and frustration is setting in. Jazz can’t get a double chickenwing so Purrazzo snaps off an exploder suplex. The Queen’s Gambit retains the title at 13:08.

Rating: C+. They were going for the big, emotional moment here and came pretty close to nailing it. Jazz might not be the biggest legend of all time but she has wrestled everywhere and done pretty well for a long time, so it is more than ok to give her something like this. Solid enough match too, making this feel like a good co-main event.

Post match Purrazzo leaves and Jazz gets the big sendoff, with Jordynne Grace coming in to thank her. This would be a lot better if Striker would shut up about Mama calling on the Louisiana wind and her children always waiting. Just….stop talking sometimes man.

Tommy Dreamer has been attacked so the main event will be 4-3.

Eddie Edwards/Willie Mack/Rich Swann vs. Violent By Design

This a Hardcore War, meaning WarGames (minus the cage) with two men starting for three minutes and the team who won a coin toss (Violent By Design) sending in another man after two minutes. Two minutes later, the other team evens things up. Once all eight are in, it is the first fall to win with No DQ of course. Eddie Edwards and Deaner start things off on the floor as Striker wants Dreamer to come out in the Willis Reed or Kirk Gibson moment.

They knock each other around on the floor before heading inside, where Eddie hits a belly to belly suplex. That sends them back outside…and then get back in, with Eddie hammering away to take over. The Backpack Stunner connects as time expires, with Striker, who read the rules earlier, not being sure who has the advantage. Rhino is in to make it 2-1 and the slow beating is on. Brown talks about how Rhino has changed, to the point where Rhino won’t even speak to him.

As I try to imagine Brown and Rhino as a team with Rhino doing the head shake, Willie Mack, with Kenny and a chain (which Striker thinks sounds like a country song) comes in to even things up. The good guys take over with various weapons shots, including a toaster (Brown: “I love French toast.”) until Joe Doering comes in to make it 3-2.

Edwards and Mack jump the monster but he knocks both of them down at once without much trouble. Deaner puts Mack’s hand in the toaster and bends it back until Rich Swann is in to even it up. Swann cleans house, including kicking Doering low, with a handicap parking sign. With Violent By Design down, Swann and Edwards set up a table at ringside as Eric Young comes in to complete the villains.

Young brings in a hockey stick to beat on people in various painful ways until the countdown is on and…..Trey Miguel evens things up with a golf club. Miguel gets in Doering’s face and gets crushed with a crossbody, which has Striker loudly thanking God for Doering. Deaner beats on Mack but gets caught with Swann’s handspring cutter. Rhino Gores Swann through a table in the corner for two, meaning it’s time to go to the corner.

The Tower of Doom plants everyone but Doering, who puts Eddie on a table outside. Miguel gets up with a top rope Meteora to drive Doering through Eddie through the table though, leaving Mack 3-1 inside. Rhino is sent outside and a pop up Downward Spiral gets two on Doering with Young making the save. Young is back up with the piledriver to finish Mack at 20:25.

Rating: C+. This was pretty good but felt a bit like the hold house show versions of WarGames in the NWA days. Yeah it’s a big, violent match but don’t expect anything taken to the next level. Miguel coming in to replace Dreamer was a surprise and Dreamer not getting the spotlight was nice. They did well enough for a main event here, but it’s no classic, at least partially due to Striker’s odd obsession with Doering.

Overall Rating: C. I’m not sure how much more you were expecting from a hardcore themed show over Wrestlemania weekend. It advanced some stories and gave us a few good moments with some talented wrestlers. For $10, that’s about all you can ask for and it worked out as well as could be expected. Nothing worth seeing on here, but if you throw it on, you won’t have the worst time.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 30, 2021: The 1000 Club

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 30, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We’re coming up on Hardcore Justice and that means a lot more Tommy Dreamer. It fits a bit better this time around but that doesn’t exactly make things all the more interesting. I’m not entirely sure what we are going to get for the show, but until then we are in for a lot more Kenny Omega as the harvesting of Impact continues. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Havok/Nevaeh vs. Fire N Flava

Non-title and Havok/Nevaeh seem to be fine after some recent issues. Kiera talks a lot of trash to Havok to start and is launched across the ring. A backbreaker gets two on Kiera and it’s off to Nevaeh. That means a trip into the corner so Nevaeh can hit a Hennig necksnap for two.

Havok comes back in and gets sent into the corner, setting up a running boot to the face. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Kiera goes up, only to be pulled out of the air for a slam. The hot tag brings in Nevaeh as everything breaks down. Havok’s sitout powerbomb (where she didn’t get Kiera that far up) gets two but Tasha is back with a cutter. A frog splash finishes Havok at 7:18.

Rating: C-. This is another match we’ve seen over and over again so any of the impact that it could have is long gone. There are only so many times you can do this and we reached that point a good while ago. The women’s tag division has such little depth that there is pretty much one team to go after the titles. Now that they have lost over and over, I’m not sure what is left for the belts.

Post match Nevaeh turns on Havok and beats her down to end the team.

James Storm is ready for his 1000th match in Impact tonight. Storm talks about how Bob Ryder kept saying Storm and Chris Harris had something special and made sure they were on TV. Tonight Storm is ready for Eric Young and has some friends. Chris Sabin comes in and he has a surprise: Harris is here too, and it’s time for a nice reunion.

Deonna Purrazzo and Susan hate Jazz did to Kimber Lee and swear revenge. Jazz runs in to beat them both down.

Sami Callihan vs. Larry D

Acey Romero is here with Larry. Sami goes straight at him to start and knocks Larry out to the floor. A dive is cut off and Sami is sent into the apron so we can take a break. Back with Larry knocking Sami outside again and sending him into the post. They go back inside with Larry hitting a hard clothesline, causing Striker to ask “is there a cover in Larry D?”, because Striker has to make everything sound weird.

Sami gets up and catches Larry on top, meaning it’s a Death Valley Driver for two. They head to the apron where Larry blocks a piledriver so Sami slips back inside to rake the eyes with a bit of fiendish gleaming. Sami hits MJF’s Heatseeker (a jumping hanging piledriver) for the pin at 8:44.

Rating: C-. There is only so much someone of Sami’s average size can do against a monster like Larry and that was on display here. They did their thing about as well as could be expected here and the big story is probably coming after the match because there wasn’t much in the match itself.

Post match XXXL beats Sami down but Trey Miguel doesn’t make the save. Sami seems pleased, as this story must continue.

Video on FinJuice taking the Tag Team Titles to New Japan.

Kenny Omega, Don Callis and the Good Brothers are not happy with FinJuice. They’re about to watch the One Winged Angel video again, but Omega and Callis have an idea for the Brothers.

Sami Callihan talks to Trey Miguel about pushing him to his limit. Trey needs to use his anger to put himself on a new level. Sami claims credit for Trey’s success and wants them to team up against XXXL next week. That’s a no, but Sami says think about it work a week.

Brian Myers vs. Suicide

Suicide grabs the arm to start and we’re in a quickly broken Octopus. Myers slips out and hits him in the throat, followed by a Falcon Arrow for two. A Rock Bottom sets up the Roster Cut to finish Suicide at 2:53.

Post match Myers talks about Matt Cardona’s challenge to a match, which isn’t going to happen because this is Myers’ place, not Cardona’s.

Jazz comes up to Tommy Dreamer and wants to face Deonna Purrazzo. Dreamer brings up ECW’s Ultimate Jeopardy match, which we can bring back with a title vs. career match at Hardcore Justice. Works for Jazz.

Tony Schiavone and Tony Khan preview this week’s edition of AEW Dynamite. Khan rants about how annoying Kenny Omega is but makes sure to hype up his six man tag this week. This sends Khan sailing into a rant about how he is the professional wrestling world and the Forbidden Door. With the insanity still rolling, Khan talks about some more of the card, with Schiavone wrapping it up.

We go to Swinger’s Palace, where Johnny Swinger won’t let John E. Bravo use the restroom. Don Callis and Kenny Omega come in to ask about some action on Omega vs. Rich Swann. They even show the One Winged Angel video, which is enough to sway the odds. Callis puts down a $20,000 bet on Omega.

TJP/Josh Alexander vs. Madman Fulton/Ace Austin

Alexander and TJP argue over who gets to start with Fulton, who eventually throws Alexander around to get going. Austin comes in for all of a few seconds before Fulton comes in so Alexander can grab a headlock. That’s broken up so Alexander hits a top rope shoulder to drop the monster again. It’s back to Austin, with Alexander taking him down in a hurry. Everything breaks down just as fast with Alexander getting mad at TJP for helping him. That’s fine with TJP, who tags himself in and gets taken down into Austin’s chinlock.

Fulton adds a middle rope choke and we hit the chinlock again. TJP breaks that up in a hurry and we hear more of Striker’s nonsense designed to sound smart. The hot tag brings in Alexander to clean house as everything breaks down again. Alexander seems to take a shot to the eye though and splashes TJP in the corner by mistake. Austin kicks Alexander in the face for two but he’s right back with a Regal Roll. TJP tags himself in again and hits the Mamba Splash but they fight over the cover. During the confusion, TJP gets rolled up for the pin at 9:12.

Rating: C. So to recap, in a match after we tease tag team partners who don’t get along, we get tag team partners who don’t get along. Alexander vs. TJP should be a good one, but seeing them go this route to get there takes a lot of the fun out of whatever they are going to do. It’s such a tired plot device but we keep seeing it over and over, even twice on a show in this case.

Don Callis comes up to Willie Mack and talks about bringing Mack into the company. He shows Mack the One Winged Angel video but Rich Swann comes in. Callis: “Kenny loves your finishing move and can’t wait to kick out of it.” Swann talks about his heart and says he would slap Callis’ glasses off if Callis wasn’t his boss. That’s fine with Callis, who isn’t his boss for the next ten minutes. Cue Kenny Omega and the Good Brothers for the beatdown but Eddie Edwards and Mack make the save to clear the room.

Coming soon: something that doesn’t have all of the letters in its name.

Rohit Raju comes up to Hernandez and suggests the team name Indian Latin Xchange. Hernandez just cares about money and tells Raju to go get some.

Violent By Design is ready to beat James Storm in his 1000th match tonight. They have all been cleansed by the violent water of change.

Tommy Dreamer has a talent meeting for Hardcore Justice. Deonna Purrazzo is ready for Jazz and leaves, but Dreamer talks to Susan about Su. She has no idea what he means and Purrazzo pulls Susan out. Dreamer announces a multi-woman Knockouts scramble where anything goes for a title shot at Rebellion. Some of the women are more pleased than others.

Here’s what’s coming next week and at Hardcore Justice.

Eric Young vs. James Storm

This is Storm’s 1000th Impact match and Violent By Design, Chris Harris, Jake Something and Chris Sabin are all here. Feeling out process to start as Striker says Storm is the best tag team wrestler in Impact history. Striker: “There. I said it!” Who else would it possibly be? The guy has more reigns (15) and more days (over 1,600) as champion (between NWA/Impact) than anyone so that’s not much of a bold declaration there. Storm hammers away and elbows him into the ropes but Young knocks him outside.

We take a break and come back with Young getting two as Storm has to grab the rope. Young chokes on the rope as Striker lists off the names on the ringside, again showing how bad Something is as a wrestling name. Storm fights up with some shots to the face and a running neckbreaker for two as they’re both down.

Eye of the Storm and the Last Call are broken up but the second Eye of the Storm works just fine. Young is back with his own neckbreaker into a top rope elbow for two more. A superkick gives Young two and Storm is sent outside, meaning it’s time to start the big brawl. Young goes after Chris Harris, who knocks him silly with a left hand. Back in and the Last Call (which commentary says means Closing Time, which is Storm’s Codebreaker) gives Storm the pin at 13:58.

Rating: C. This is the definition of a fun match for a feel good moment and that is what we got. Storm winning with his old partner’s help was a fine way to go and it helps to have Young get kicked in the face every time. Now unfortunately there is some bad news, as Young tore his ACL in there somewhere and, aside from some previously taped matches, this is going to be it for Young for probably the rest of the year.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event helped a lot here so there is only so much that you can complain about here. At the end of the day, this was all about a one off celebration of James Storm and hyping up Omega and pals getting in the ring next week. Oh and tag partners who hate each other, but the less I have to think about that, the better. Not much of a show, but the main point worked out well enough.

Results

Fire N Flava b. Havok/Nevaeh – Frog splash to Havok

Sami Callihan b. Larry D. – Hanging jumping piledriver

Brian Myers b. Suicide – Roster Cut

Ace Austin/Madman Fulton b. TJP/Josh Alexander – Rollup to TJP

James Storm b. Eric Young – Last Call

 

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – March 23, 2021: Everyone Else But Him

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 23, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We are on the road to Rebellion and that means it is time to start hammering home some of the card. This time around it is going to include an appearance from Kenny Omega and that means things are about to be dropped to focus on him. That makes sense given that he is the biggest star on the show, but it doesn’t do much for anyone around here once he leaves. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Don Callis leads Kenny Omega into the building.

Opening recap.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jazz

Non-title with Susan and Jordynne Grace here as well. They go to the mat to start with Jazz switching into a hammerlock. Back up and Jazz hits some snap jabs but a drop toehold puts her into the ropes. Susan gets in some choking and Purrazzo’s clothesline gets two. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Jazz’s back but she jawbreaks her way to freedom. Purrazzo misses a charge into the post, setting up Jazz’s spinning kick to the head for two. A facebuster gives Jazz two, mainly due to Susan putting the foot on the rope. Jazz goes for Susan and gets a shoe upside the head, allowing Purrazzo to get the pin at 6:24.

Rating: C-. Just a match here and odds are the ending sets up a rematch for Hardcore Justice, which may or may not be the best idea. Above all else, Purrazzo could use some fresh competition and Jazz will do fine as a short term challenger. I’m not sure what they are going to do at Rebellion, but at least Jazz should keep them covered for the time being.

The Good Brothers are telling stories to some of the locker room when Eddie Edwards comes in to mock them for suddenly being willing to change with the boys now that they have lost their titles. The Brothers leave and run into Decay, who mock them as well.

Johnny Swinger, a 26 year old male, gives us a commercial for Swinger’s Palace. Alisha Edwards (with an unlit cigarette and a graphic saying she has a problem) talks about how the cards keep moving around here. Lenny Powers, an out of work security guard, has shown his brother he isn’t the black sheep. Completely non disgruntled employee John E. Bravo is glad to be the dealer here. Come try your luck! This was funny.

Rohit Raju runs into Fallah Bahh, who has hit a rough patch and is sleeping in the studio. Raju yells at him and tells him to get it together. Violence is teased.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

X-Division Title: TJP vs. Ace Austin

Austin, with Madman Fulton, is defending. They go to the exchange of holds to start, which shockingly enough goes to TJP. Austin manages to take him to the mat but TJP kicks him away without much effort. Back up and TJP dropkicks him into the corner, only to have Austin springboard out with a spinning kick to the head.

TJP gets dropped onto the apron and they head up top, with TJP being dropped down hard with a super gordbuster. We take a break and come back with Austin working on a half crab. That’s switched into a double chickenwing to keep TJP in trouble but he manages to reverse into an abdominal stretch. Austin breaks it up so TJP kicks him down, only to get kicked in the face.

Austin’s top rope Fameasser gets two but he misses a charge and gets caught in something like the Octopus in the ropes. That’s broken up so TJP misses the Mamba splash. A double clothesline puts both of them down for a bit, allowing Austin to try the Fold. TJP counters that into the Detonation kick into the Mamba splash but Fulton comes in for the DQ at 13:20.

Rating: C+. This was good while it lasted but you could see the ending coming from the second Fulton came through the curtain. That’s not a bad thing either, as the monster saving the champ who gets in trouble is as simple and effective of a booking trope as you can find. If nothing else, it makes the big title change down the line feel more important.

Josh Alexander runs in for the save.

We get a sitdown interview with Matt Cardona, who is ready to open all of the presents he sees around here. Cardona talks about how social media has meant a lot to his career, which brings him to Brian Myers accusing him of riding his coattails and following him to Impact. That isn’t the case, because Cardona is here for competition. If Myers wants a match, come get it, and then they’re done.

Trey Miguel runs into XXXL and a fight is teased but Tommy Dreamer pops up to say they can have an exploding ring barbed wire deathmatch at Hardcore Justice. XXXL leaves and Miguel wants to fight Romero tonight. Dreamer talks about what happens when someone gets in your head and warns Miguel not to go there.

Rohit Raju vs. Fallah Bahh

Bahh wastes no time in hitting a belly to belly but misses a crossbody. Raju hammers away but Bahh shrugs it off and hits a twisting slam. The Banzai Drop is up and Raju’s double stomp gets two. Bahh charges into the running knee but doesn’t go down. That leaves Raju to try a sunset flip but he has to avoid the sitdown splash, meaning it’s a crucifix with tights to finish Bahh at 3:49.

Rating: D+. Another match that didn’t have time to go anywhere but you could only expect to much out of this. Bahh has come a long way and him being the poor gambling addict is more of a character than he has had before, though I’m not sure how far he can go. Raju continues to be one of the bigger surprises in Impact as he has gone from nothing to a completely watchable star.

Kenny Omega and Don Callis say they will do their talking in the ring.

We get the Tony Schiavone/Tony Khan Dynamite preview, this time featuring Don Callis and Kenny Omega. We run down the card and Omega is not worried about facing Matt Sydal because there is a 0% chance of him earning a title shot.

The Good Brothers can’t get in to see Kenny Omega and aren’t happy about it. The idea that he’s not in his dressing room doesn’t seem to occur to them.

Here are Kenny Omega and Don Callis for a chat. Omega says this is his land and Callis promises that Omega will have the title sooner rather than later. Callis talks about his chat with Rich Swann last week. Swann can have anything he wants and all the success he wants, but he can’t get the One Winged Angel out of his head. We hear about how Omega is the greatest wrestler of all time and Callis is ready to suck all of the talent out of this company if it helps Omega.

Callis has prepared a tribute to the One Winged Angel and Omega talks about how scared everyone is to be around him. The day he arrived in Impact was the greatest day in the history of Impact, but it was Tuesday to Omega. There is no one here who can beat him and until he falls on a banana peel, no one is taking this title from him. They promise to destroy everyone here, including Rich Swann.

Eric Young talks about showing Rhino the truth and the monster inside of him.

Fire N Flava talk trash to Havok and Nevaeh. A match is set, but it’s non-title because the champs want them to earn something. Fire N Flava leave so here are Kaleb With A K and Tenille Dashwood to offer another alliance with Nevaeh. Again, it doesn’t go anywhere.

Acey Romero vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel starts fast but gets knocked out of the corner with a big forearm. After a quick trip to the floor, Miguel charges into a side slam and we take a break. Back with Romero hitting a splash for two and we hit the double arm crank. Miguel fights up with some forearms and a spinning kick to the head gets two. Another springboard is Pounced out of the air to give Romero two but Miguel gets smart by kicking the knee out. A springboard cutter sets up the top rope Meteora for the pin at 8:20.

Rating: C-. Another not so great match here but it worked out well enough. Miguel getting a win is a good thing after last week’s war against Sami Callihan. I’m not sure where Miguel goes from here, but as long as it isn’t another stupid version of “they hate each other and now they’re partners”, I think he’ll be fine.

Post match the beatdown is on but Sami Callihan makes the save. OH COME ON WITH HIS STUPID IDEA AGAIN.

Rich Swann isn’t sweating the One Winged Angel because every time he and Omega have been one on one, Swann has gotten the better of it. So it’s Omega who needs to be ready.

James Storm is ready for his 1000th match around here and he’s ready to face Eric Young in #1000. Scott D’Amore comes in to make the match next week’s main event.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Eddie Edwards vs. Karl Anderson

Feeling out process to start but Eddie picks up the pace with an overhead belly to belly. A clothesline over the top puts Anderson on the floor and there’s the suicide dive. We take a break and come back with a Doc Gallows distraction letting Anderson shove Eddie off the top and out to the floor. That’s enough for the referee, who makes Gallows…..sit in a chair.

Back in and Anderson cranks on the arm and neck for a bit before whipping Edwards hard into the corner. Commentary talks about the One Winged Angel some more but starts paying attention more during a chinlock. Eddie finally fights up and manages a release gordbuster. The Backpack Stunner gets two and the Blue Thunder Bomb is good for the same. The Gun Stun is broken up so Eddie tries an O’Connor roll, only to have the kickout send him into Gallows’ chair. Anderson hits a spinebuster for the pin at 13:48.

Rating: C+. I know the Good Brothers can be over the top with a lot of their antics but they can wrestle a pretty decent match when they are given the chance. Granted in this case it helps having Eddie Edwards in there because he can wrestle with anyone. Not a great match, but it was perfectly serviceable for a main event.

Post match FinJuice pops up to talk about how they have won all over Japan and talk about various young boy things, because this feud is still about Japan.

Overall Rating: C-. Omega’s promo was the highlight, and that is kind of the problem around here. I do get completely sick of Impact acting like Omega/FinJuice/anyone from any other promotion is like some kind of gift from Heaven but Omega really is a lot better than almost anyone here. Now if they could use that as a way to boost up Impact rather than Omega, we might be onto something. The wrestling and stories were mostly just ok, but this show was all about Omega. As usual.

Results

Deonna Purrazzo b. Jazz – Rollup after a shoe shot from Susan

TJP b. Ace Austin via DQ when Madman Fulton interfered

Rohit Raju b. Fallah Bahh – Crucifix with tights

Trey Miguel b. Acey Romero – Top rope Meteora

Karl Anderson b. Eddie Edwards – Spinebuster

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – February 2, 2021: I’m Scared For This Company

Impact Wrestling
Date: February 2, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Matt Striker, D’Lo Brown

We’re still on the way to a variety of shows and that could make things interesting. The AEW mini invasion continues and that is not the worst thing in the world. That is going to include Private Party challenging the Good Brothers for the Tag Team Titles in the near future but we need to build up some more things than just that. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Tasha Steelz vs. Havok

Kiera Hogan and Nevaeh are both at ringside. Steelz hammers away to start with little success because Havok kicks her out of the corner without much effort. Some kicks to the leg put Havok down though and a big kick to the head gets two. Steelz drops elbows onto the leg so Havok goes to the rope for the break. Back up and Havok screams a lot, setting up a running boot in the corner. The spinning Side Effect gives Havok two but she has to stop to choke Hogan. It doesn’t exactly matter though as the Tombstone finishes Steelz at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Total destruction here with Havok shrugging off the leg work to pick up the win without much trouble. That makes sense as Havok is a heck of a monster and shouldn’t be having any major issues in a singles match against most people. They’ll likely do the title change before too long and that’s a fine way to go with the new belts.

The announcers throw us to a clip from after last week’s show, where Ken Shamrock snapped and beat up a lot of referees, plus dropped Sami Callihan.

Sami Callihan is in Scott D’Amore’s office and is told that Shamrock is suspended indefinitely. Callihan is actually happy because he was going to fire Shamrock anyway.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Rich Swann and Tommy Dreamer talk about how nice Dreamer was to give up the World Title shot at Barely Legal so Terry Funk could have the shot. Tonight, Dreamer is going to hold up his end of the card.

The Good Brothers hype up this week’s AEW Dynamite and are ready to beat up Jon Moxley. They’re ready to beat up Private Party too, but here are James Storm and Chris Sabin to interrupt, because they aren’t happy. The Brothers back away from the challenge but the match can be on next week, because the Brothers have to be ready for Dynamite.

Madman Fulton vs. Josh Alexander

Ace Austin is here with Fulton. Alexander tries to take the monster down to start but gets tossed with a release suplex. Fulton sends him face first into the buckle and chokes away but Alexander slips out of a suplex and hits him in the face. The ankle lock goes on for a bit, only to get kicked out to the floor in a hurry. A chokeslam onto the apron rocks Alexander again but he’s right back with a roaring elbow. The Jay Driller finishes 4:48.

Rating: C. The ending came out of nowhere but there are far worse ideas than pushing Alexander. There’s something about him when he goes out there and does his thing, which makes him feel like someone you want to see. Hopefully he gets some kind of a push around here, which would certainly be worth looking into. Fulton losing clean like that doesn’t bode well for him, but he has been past his peak for a bit now anyway.

The Good Brothers have their own action figures.

Johnny Swinger comes into his casino to collect the money from John E. Bravo. Alisha Edwards doesn’t like how Swinger is treating Fallah Bahh, because it always seems to be in Swinger’s World.

Eddie Edwards thanks Matt Cardona for what he did. The tag match is set for No Surrender.

Crazzy Steve vs. Larry D.

Rosemary is here with Steve and Acey Romero is here with Larry, as we’re now in the third generation of stories based around Wrestle House. Steve slugs away and manages to take Larry down for some right hands to the face. Larry throws him outside though, with Acey getting in a few shots. Back in and Steve gets choked in the corner, where Rosemary gives him a bit of a pep talk. Larry gets two off a low superkick but Steve bites him on the forehead. Steve bites his way out of some clotheslines as well but dives into the Best Hand In The House for the pin at 4:01.

Rating: D+. I’m rapidly approaching the point of never needing to see these people again, though Decay is a better fit for both of them. XXXL on the other hand….I get why they’re here and I get why they’re a good choice to put in the ring. That being said, giving them some kind of detailed backstory and being anything more than big brawlers is a bit more than needs to be there.

Post match, Rosemary scares the big guys off.

We get a sitdown interview with Trey Miguel, who is ready to show what he can do on his own. Sami Callihan pops in but he isn’t here to fight. Callihan talks about Trey wasting a great goodbye and now Trey needs to find out what he wants to be.

XXXL isn’t scared of Rosemary but you never hit a woman. Tenille Dashwood comes in and says she’ll hit Rosemary for them. That works for Larry and if Decay can find a third, the six person tag can be on for No Surrender.

Susan vs. Jordynne Grace

Rating: C-. I’m still not feeling the Susan deal, which is giving more bad flashbacks to the Governor deal with the Beautiful People. Grace winning is fine of course and I can always go for more of her, though Lee and Jazz aren’t exactly thrilling. The division continues to take some weird directions given the talent there, but at least they have something going most of the time.

Post match the beatdown is on with Grace and Jazz in trouble until ODB returns for the save. Oh come on haven’t I suffered enough with this show???

Matt Hardy tells Private Party that he has this going forward. Now they need to go win the battle royal on Dynamite so they can win two titles. That means more money for Big Money Matt and some more money for them too!

It’s time for Tony and Tony, with both of them holding coconut drinks and Schiavone in a flower shirt with a shark hat. Khan knows about how to book a big show and Impact is like his own fantasy league. He’s letting Jon Moxley go to New Japan to defend his US Title and Don Callis has driven him to these wacky moves. Schiavone runs down the Beach Break card and Khan says he’s an emotional shark.

ODB says she poked her head in to see what was going on and didn’t like the bullying. They all grab their chests and say BAM.

Rohit Raju vs. TJP

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with TJP dodging a lot and managing something like an octopus out of a crucifix attempt. That’s broken up so Raju kicks him in the face and dropkicks him out to the floor as we take a break. Back with TJP slugging away but walking into a Downward Spiral for two. An elbow gives Raju two more and frustration is already setting in.

There’s a belly to back for another two but TJP scores with a springboard spinning shot to the face. A middle rope hurricanrana sets up a tornado DDT but TJP has to bail out of a Swanton attempt. Raju dives off the top into some raised boots, only to have TJP bail to the floor. Cue Mahabali Shera (OH COME ON) to pull TJP back out and plant him on the apron. Raju hits a sliding knee for the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. Good grief, are they really trying to drive me this crazy around here? Shera is one of those guys who may have changed for the better but is still one of those names best associated with the darker days of Impact. As long as he isn’t doing that stupid dance, he should be fine but I’m not sure how many fans are going to be happy to see him.

Violent By Design talk about being violent by design. The olive branch isn’t being offered to everyone, but Eric Young can baptize Cody Deaner in violence.

Cody will answer next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week and at No Surrender.

Chris Bey/Moose vs. Rich Swann/Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer and Bey trade headlock takeovers to start and that means a standoff. Bey knocks him down in a hurry though and we take a break. Back with Swann coming in to strike away at Moose, who throws him into the corner for the running uppercut. Bey runs him over as well and grinds away with a headlock. Swann gets faster and spins around, setting up a dropkick for his own two.

Dreamer comes back in for an abdominal stretch but since that’s a bit exhausting, it’s already back to Swann for a kick to the back. A few kicks put Swann down though and Moose comes in to rip away at the eyes. Swann’s sunset flip only gets one before Bey is back up to elbow him in the face. The chinlock doesn’t last long and an enziguri goes a bit better for Swann, allowing the hot tag off to Dreamer. Moose crotches Swann on top though and hits the spear (with Dreamer sidestepping it) for the pin on Swann at 12:09.

Rating: C-. I know it’s just building towards a one off match for an Impact Plus special but Dreamer feels so out of place and tacked on here. Moose vs. Swann has been built up, just like Swann vs. Kenny Omega, but Dreamer is getting this one off spot that it takes a few weeks to set up. It isn’t going to matter long term, but egads it is dragging some weeks down.

Moose spears Dreamer down as well and poses with both titles to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. It isn’t even like this show is that bad, but the amount of people they are bringing out of mothballs and pushing in fairly big spots are making me feel like the old days. That’s the kind of time reputation that Impact has been trying to shake for years now and yet here we are again. I really hope this doesn’t last, but the association with AEW is making Impact feel REALLY lame by comparison and the future is hardly looking bright. Instead it’s looking old, as there are fewer and fewer young stars in prominent spots around here. Don’t do that again, because it has been done horribly so many times before.

Results

Havok b. Tasha Steelz – Tombstone

Josh Alexander b. Madman Fulton – Jay Driller

Larry D. b. Crazzy Steve – Best Hand In The House

Jordynne Grace b. Susan – Grace Driver

Rohit Raju b. TJP – Sliding knee

Moose/Chris Bey b. Tommy Dreamer/Rich Swann – Spear to Swann

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Impact Wrestling – January 26, 2021: How Many Years Too Late?

Impact Wrestling
Date: January 26, 2021
Location: Skyway Studios, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: D’Lo Brown, Matt Striker

We’re on the way to both Rebellion and No Surrender, meaning things are going to slowly start taking shape. That is not a bad thing either, as Impact is a lot better when they have a focus. Odds are we’re coming up on Moose vs. Rich Swann for the World Title, which should be something good. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Matt Hardy and Private Party invading last week and becoming #1 contenders to the Tag Team Titles.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Rich Swann for a chat. Swann talks about everything that he did to get back here and now he has a target on his back. For now though he has something to take care of so he would like Tommy Dreamer to come out here right now. Swann talks about No Surrender being on February 13, which happens to be Dreamer’s 50th birthday. He watched Dreamer back in the land of extreme and now wants to repay the favor by giving Dreamer a shot at the title.

Cue Sami Callihan to say this is Dreamer trying to get himself over as usual. Swann lost to Kenny Omega and embarrassed the company. Sami is the heart and soul of the company and deserves a title shot. Cue Chris Bey to say that February 13 is his birthday as well so he should get a title shot. Now it’s Moose coming out everyone is scared to challenge for his title so he’s here to interject. Swann has never beaten him and Moose knows he remembers when Moose nearly decapitated Willie Mack.

Yeah Swann remembers, but Moose said the title shot was on his time. The No Surrender match is already set so now it’s on Swann’s time. Cue Willie Mack to Stun Bey and go after Moose, with Striker not exactly being excited about the whole thing. The villains bail and the six man seems imminent for later. Sami makes the lights go out and here’s Ken Shamrock to jump Swann, Mack and Dreamer with the rest of the villains joining him in the beatdown.

Post break, Swann and company are ready for a match tonight, with Dreamer promising to “UFC Shamrock’s a**.” They go to see Scott D’Amore, who says they look terrible. The match is on but D’Amore thinks they need a fourth. Now Impact’s resident mathematician Scott Steiner isn’t available, but D’Amore has an idea. There is someone in his office and the trio looks very pleased.

Here’s what’s coming tonight and at No Surrender.

Matt Cardona/Josh Alexander vs. Ace Austin/Madman Fulton

Fallout from an interview gone bad last week. Alexander goes for Fulton’s ankle to start and gets kicked into the corner for his efforts. Austin comes in and gets planted down in a hurry before it’s off to Cardona (with the bright lime green trunks). A clothesline puts Austin on the floor and Alexander backdrops Cardona onto the two of them for a big crash. We take a break and come back with Alexander getting caught in a side slam/middle rope legdrop combination. Austin drives a knee into the back and pulls Alexander into the corner as we’re firmly in the tag formula.

A claw legsweep gives Fulton two but Alexander manages to kick him into Austin, allowing the hot tag to Cardona. That means the middle rope dropkick to rock Austin but it’s too early for the Reboot. Instead Cardona settles for two off a slingshot splash but Fulton makes the save and drags Austin to the corner. Everything breaks down and Alexander slugs away on Fulton to knock the monster to his knees. Cardona charges at Austin, who launches him into a Rough Ryder (going to need a new name) to finish Fulton at 10:18.

Rating: C. This took some time to get going and I’m still not big on a lot of what Cardona does in the ring, but he looked smooth here. Maybe he can get somewhere on his own and if that is case, great for him for proving himself right after all the years in WWE. It’s also nice to see more of Austin, who I would like to see move up the ladder around here. The same is true of Alexander, even if he is still playing second fiddle in a tag team.

Flashback Moment of the Week: Matt Hardy debuts at Genesis 2011 against Rob Van Dam. It’s only his entrance and this only lasts about a minute.

Rohit Raju is all fired up to win the X-Division Title back but he needs someone (off camera) to help him. Whoever it is seems to agree.

It’s time for the weekly visit from Tony Khan and Tony Schiavone. They care about each other, just like Khan cares about the wrestling fans. He sees Impact as his own fantasy wrestling league. Last week he was in the zone with Matt Hardy, Jerry Lynn and Matt Hardy and now Private Party might win the Impact Wrestling Tag Team Titles. They would have to beat the Good Brothers, who happen to be on Dynamite tomorrow night! Schiavone runs down the Dynamite card and Khan talks about Beach Break.

Brian Myers runs into Matt Cardona in the back and doesn’t seem impressed. Myers leaves and Cardona says that was a bad move.

Eddie Edwards vs. Brian Myers

Eddie, who is rather banged up from Barbed Wire Massacre, sends him over to the ropes to start and we get a clean break. The referee yells at Myers over a possible hair pull so Eddie snaps off a belly to belly to the floor. There’s a suicide dive to take Myers down as it’s all Eddie so far. Back in and Myers rolls right back to the floor, where he gets in a shot to Eddie’s bad arm.

Myers stomps away in the corner and trips Eddie down but he comes back with some clotheslines. As Striker says that whoever is in D’Amore’s office will be the next Lex Luger at the Great American Mall (I believe he means Mall of America, as again Striker isn’t as smart as he tries to sound), Eddie hits a Backpack Stunner. Myers grabs a Downward Spiral and loads up his clothesline, only to charge into a thumb to the eye. Eddie drives him down with the thumb in the eye and gets DQ’ed at 6:14.

Rating: C. I haven’t been big on Myers since he started getting pushed but this worked out well enough. Granted that might be due to Eddie Edwards being in there, but at least we didn’t have to see Myers win another match with a clothesline. Eddie going more heelish could be interesting, assuming they actually pull the full trigger this time around.

Fire and Flava want their celebration to be awesome and hope they sold enough tickets. Johnny Swinger walks by with a group of women, saying the palace is this way. Kiera Hogan says she has the worst idea.

Matt Hardy praises Private Party for their win last week but they did it because of him. They are ready to win the Tag Team Titles at No Surrender but are also going to win the battle royal to get the AEW Tag Team Title shot at Revolution. He’ll even throw in a bonus by not taking as much off the top of their checks! It’s time to go be winners.

Tenille Dashwood vs. Rosemary

Dashwood has Kaleb With A K with her while Rosemary, with far less face paint than usual, has Crazzy Steve. Rosemary runs her over to start but Kaleb gets up for a distraction, allowing Dashwood to unload with the camera bag for two. Dashwood grabs a neckbreaker over the apron to send Rosemary outside, where she punches Kaleb in the face.

That earns her a trip back inside, where Rosemary grabs the Upside Down. With that broken up, Dashwood runs her over for two more. The seated full nelson goes on but Rosemary fights up and runs her over with a clothesline. There’s a fall away slam to send Dashwood flying but the spear only hits corner. Not that it matters as As Above, So Below finishes Dashwood at 4:55.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what the problem here was but Rosemary looked rather different here, seeming a bit slower and without the same spark in her eyes. She hasn’t looked the same since returning from her knee injury, but that has been a long time now. This didn’t work so well for her, and hopefully that isn’t the new norm.

XXXL is glad to be back when Rosemary and Crazzy Steve come up. Larry lays out Steve so Rosemary barks at both of them.

We go to Swinger’s Palace, where John E. Bravo is dealing Blackjack to Fallah Bahh, who loses quite a bit. Fire and Flava come in and want them to go the party, including the Swingerellas, who can serve drinks. Fallah Bahh can’t come because he has no money, which makes Swinger (in an extreme closeup) laugh at him. The sad Bahh is left alone.

Deonna Purrazzo brags to Kimber Lee and Susan about retaining the Knockouts Title. Lee and Susan brag about beating Jazz and Jordynne Grace, who pop in to issue the challenge. Grace calls Susan Susie, who does not like the old name. The match is on for next week.

And now it’s Fire and Flava Fest, with Alisha as emcee and promising to praise her homies. The only guests here are a referee, John E. Bravo, Johnny Swinger and the Swingerellas. Alisha introduces Fire and Flava, with Kiera Hogan (the Fire) loudly bragging about their win. Tasha Steelz (that would be the Flava) talks about how they promised they would be here and it’s time to star the party. The six guests aren’t exactly making that much noise, with the referee saying this is a dumpster fire. Hogan: “YOUR OUTFIT IS A DUMPSTER FIRE!”

It’s time for the Swingerellas to hand out the food, which means some boxed sandwiches. Bravo complains about the bread so it’s time for the booze, which Alisha spits out after one sip. Hold on though as there is a Marshmallow Man at ringside, which Steelz knows is Fallah Bahh. Actually it’s Nevaeh, who decks Steelz. Havok pops up and clotheslines Hogan but can’t quite put her through the table. Catering is destroyed and Alisha declares Havok and Nevaeh the winners. Of what isn’t clear, but they win.

James Storm and Chris Sabin have a drink and agree that while they might not be the Motor City Machine Guns or Beer Money, they’re something. Now they need the Tag Team Titles. Storm likes the idea so let’s have some shots.

Fire and Flava aren’t thrilled with what happened so here’s the referee, who complains that he got nothing of what he was promised and wants a refund. That’s not happening…..and we spent two weeks to set up a FYRE FEST JOKE??? It was old a year and a half ago when AEW did it and now we had a ten minute segment to set it up in 2021????

Joe Doering vs. Cousin Jake

The rest of Violent By Design is at ringside. Jake goes right at Doering to start and gets knocked out of the corner. A slam sets up a rebound elbow drop to keep Jake in trouble but Doering misses a crossbody. Jake tries a dive over the top but Doering kind of knocks him away. Back in and Jake hits a running shoulder to the ribs in the corner but walks into the crossbody. A big clothesline finishes Jake at 3:13.

Rating: D+. Doering is a huge guy but he feels like the latest giant monster who is going to cause trouble for a bit. I don’t particularly need to see the trope again, but maybe Doering can learn to do something other than sneer and make things better. It just feels like something that has been done so many times before and it isn’t thrilling here.

Post match the beatdown is on and they load up the Pillmanizing (with Striker saying the word with WAY too much enthusiasm and explaining who it is named after) but Young says hang on. They leave Jake with a Violent By Design shirt and walk away.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Moose/Chris Bey/Ken Shamrock/Sami Callihan vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack/Tommy Dreamer/???

The mystery partner is…..Trey Miguel, who has not been around in about two months. Striker: “For me, on a personal level, this is exciting.” Bey tags himself in to take Moose’s place, because he wants to face Dreamer. That doesn’t last long so it’s off to Swann for a rolling splash/elbow combination to keep Bey down. We take a break and come back with Bey still in trouble but he manages to get Swann over for the tag off to Sami.

The package piledriver is broken up and Swann snaps off a headscissors. Mack comes in to run Sami over and hit a standing moonsault. A dropkick takes out Mack’s knee though and Shamrock comes in to take over. Sami’s shoulder to the ribs makes Mack’s eyes bug out and the villains take turns beating him up. Mack punches Bey in the jaw to escape the corner but another dropkick takes his knee out again. Sami grabs a standing leglock and Moose powerbombs Bey onto Mack for two.

Since Bey can’t keep anything going tonight, Mack nails him with a pip up right hand, allowing the hot tag off to Miguel. The pace picks up in a hurry, including an atomic drop into something like a jumping Stunner/Codebreaker on Sami. Shamrock suplexes Miguel hard though and everything breaks down. Sami powerbombs Miguel but walks into a cutter from Dreamer. Moose spears Mack but gets missile dropkicked by Miguel. A hard suplex puts Miguel down again but he snaps off a hurricanrana to pin Sami at 12:18.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty standard main event formula match and it worked out well. The main point was the return of Trey Miguel though and that was quite the success. He has an energy to him that you aren’t going to see in most people around here and I’m glad to have him back. Now just let him win something for a change, because otherwise it’s the same problem all over again.

Post match Shamrock and Callihan are left alone, so Shamrock ankle locks the referee to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The ending helped, but this was a flat show otherwise with almost nothing important or energetic throughout the show. The lack of AEW praise for the most part helped, but man they aren’t doing themselves any favors. Tommy Dreamer gets a World Title shot? The Edgeheads Explode? Eric Young gets another low level goon? A freaking Fyre Fest joke? I need a lot more than that to make two hours work and as fun as Miguel is, he isn’t enough to fix all that.

Results

Matt Cardona/Josh Alexander b. Ace Austin/Madman Fulton – Pop up Rough Ryder to Fulton

Brian Myers b. Eddie Edwards via DQ when Edwards poked him in the eye

Rosemary b. Tenille Dashwood – As Above So Below

Joe Doering b. Cousin Jake – Running clothesline

Trey Miguel/Tommy Dreamer/Rich Swann/Willie Mack b. Moose/Sami Callihan/Ken Shamrock/Chris Bey – Hurricanrana to Callihan

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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