Impact Wrestling
Date: April 7, 2022
Location: Fairmont Hotel, Dallas, Texas
Host: Josh Matthews

It’s a special week this time around as rather than building towards Rebellion with a regular show, we’re going to look at some of the Multiverse Of Matches card. The show was held over Wrestlemania Weekend but a lot of it had little to do with the upcoming pay per view. It should be fun for a one off though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Note that I’ll be posting the full versions of the matches rather than the possibly clipped versions from the broadcast.

The opening video gives us a Multiverse Of Matches highlight reel.

X-Division Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Chris Bey vs. Blake Christian vs. Vincent vs. Rich Swann vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel is defending in Ultimate X and Swann busts out a Scott Hall pose for a great moment. It’s a group attempt to crawl across the ropes to start but that is all broken up. The audio gets a lot louder as Miguel is left alone, only to be pulled down by Swann and Bey. That means a three way exchange of strikes to the face with bey getting the better of things.

Grace is back in with a MuscleBuster to Bey but Christian clears the ring out again. Miguel takes Christian down though and goes up, only to get pulled down by Vincent. That earns Vincent a cutter from Swann, who is pulled down by Bey rather quickly. Bey plants Swann with the Art of Finesse so Christian goes up, only to drop does onto Bey with a Canadian Destroyer. Instead of climbing though, Christian hits a big flip dive onto the pile. It’s Grace going across the cables and using her legs, only to get knocked down by Miguel. That’s enough for Miguel to grab the title and retain at 7:25.

Rating: B-. This was one of those things where I’ve seen a bunch of Ultimate X matches over the years and a lot of them run together. The climbing was the focus here again as it tends to be, though it was a lot of two people do their thing and then some others take their place. Fun match, but if you’ve seen a few of these, you’ve seen them all.

Trey Miguel is ready for his triple threat title defense at Rebellion. If you can’t see the fire in his eyes right now, you aren’t looking close enough.

We look at Chelsea Green turning on Mickie James, who got taken out by Matt Cardona. A mixed tag match was set.

Mickie James is ready to take Green out and Nick Aldis is glad to be back for one night only. He just wishes it was under nicer circumstances than him stretching Cardona.

Matt Cardona/Chelsea Green vs. Nick Aldis/Mickie James

Green turned on James and Cardona took her out, so James brought in Aldis for a battle of married teams. The girls get in a brawl to start but we settle down to Aldis pounding on Cardona on the mat and in the corner. Mickie comes in but gets taken down by Cardona’s clothesline to put her in trouble. It’s off to Green to choke in the corner and forearm away, setting up the chinlock to keep James down.

The Reboot misses for Cardona though and Mickie grabs a flapjack, allowing the hot tag off to Aldis. The clothesline comeback is on, setting up a Tombstone. There’s a top rope elbow but Green makes the save as everything breaks down. Cardona has to save Green from the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf but she gets sent outside anyway. Back in and stereo King’s Lynn Cloverleafs make Cardona and Green tap at the same time at 8:00.

Rating: C. I remember this being a bit longer in person but it still worked out well enough. There is a simple story here with the two married couples going at it over one of them being attacked a few weeks ago. Aldis continues to look like a star, though he might be a bit dull, and James has been a legend for years. Green has come a long way and Cardona…my goodness he has had a career renaissance in the last year or so and it has been a lot of fun to watch.

Eddie Edwards is here representing Pro Wrestling Noah because they didn’t turn their backs on him. He is in his old school green and is ready to prove himself to Tomohiro Ishii.

Eddie Edwards vs. Tomohiro Ishii

Feeling out process to start with Edwards backing him up against the ropes to no avail. An exchange of shoulders (eventually) goes to Ishii but he is sent outside for the suicide dive. Ishii gets sent into the barricade but he is fine enough to hit a powerslam to drive Edwards into the floor. A DDT onto the apron rocks Ishii for two and Eddie is starting to get cocky.

That’s not a good idea against Ishii, who hits a suplex and unloads in the corner to take over. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets Eddie out of trouble for two and he kicks Ishii in the head in the corner. The Backpack Stunner is broken up so they trade snap German suplexes and clotheslines for a double knockdown.

Back up and Edwards starts striking away in the corner, earning a glare from Ishii and a YOU CENSORED UP chant from the crowd. Ishii hammers away but the sliding lariat is blocked and Edwards knees away. The Boston Knee Party is blocked and Ishii hits a running knee of his own. Edwards blocks the brainbuster and tries the Die Hard Driver but Ishii slips out. The big clothesline sets up the brainbuster to give Ishii the pin at 14:58.

Rating: B-. This felt like the match where they beat each other up until one of them just couldn’t get up again. That is a formula that will always work well enough, though it didn’t quite hit the highest point here. Ishii isn’t what he used to be but he is still good enough to get by on a combination of reputation and skill. If nothing else, it is nice to see a first time match that felt special, which is the point of this show.

Jonah/Josh Alexander vs. PCO/Moose

PCO jumps Alexander to start and knocks him into the corner. Alexander gets in a kick to the face though and it’s Jonah coming in, albeit after glaring at Alexander a bit (with commentary pointing out their previous issues). It’s off to Moose for the showdown with Jonah, but about ten shoulders won’t put Jonah down. One big shoulder does put Moose down, though Alexander tags himself back in to chase Moose around the ring.

PCO cuts Alexander off and it’s a double whip to send Alexander into the barricade. Back in and PCO drops his middle rope leg and Moose starts stomping on Alexander’s wrist. Alexander is able to grab a suplex on PCO but he’s back up to knock Jonah off the apron before the tag. The second attempt works just fine though and it’s Jonah coming in to clean house.

That doesn’t last long as the big backsplash misses and Alexander is already back in. Everything breaks down and PCO hits his big flip dive to the floor, setting up the Deanimator on Alexander. Back in and Jonah hits a superkick on PCO, leaving Alexander to blast Moose with a clothesline. We get the BOO/YAY slugout with Moose and Alexander until Moose bails from the threat of the C4 Spike. The Spike hits PCO instead for the pin at 12:48.

Rating: C+. Sometimes you need four big, strong guys to beat on each other for a little while. That is what we got here and it was entertaining while it lasted. That’s about all you can ask for here and they even built up Moose vs. Alexander at Rebellion. Throw in some fun interactions and this was about as good of a use of their time as they could have had.

We recap Jay White vs. Chris Sabin. They have met each other time after time and now it is Sabin’s chance to prove himself.

Chris Sabin vs. Jay White

White is a bit popular around here. A chop against the ropes wakes Sabin up to start and another hurts White’s own hand. Sabin grabs him by the arm and takes him down to the mat before grabbing an armdrag into a chop of his own. White is sent outside for the suicide dive and then gets dropped face first onto the apron. Back in and White catches him on top, setting up another chop out to the floor.

A pair of belly to back drops onto the apron have Sabin in more trouble and the half crab goes on back inside. With that broken up, White hits a backbreaker into a waistlock to stay on the back/ribs. Sabin fights up and hits a shot to the ribs of his own before another good one puts White down. Some elbows to the back of the head set up a missile dropkick to give Sabin two as his chest is a scary shade of purple.

White is back up with a snap DDT for two and a Saito suplex drops Sabin again. A swinging suplex gets two more and it’s White’s turn to be frustrated. The swinging Rock Bottom plants Sabin for another near fall and White is annoyed at the referee (the same one who allegedly messed up in the tag match last week).

Sabin counters the Blade Runner into a ram into the corner but White goes back to the damaged chest. That just fires Sabin up for some, ahem, machine gun style chops to put White down for a change. There’s the hard clothesline but the Cradle Shock is blocked. White tries the Blade Runner again, only to get rolled up to give Sabin the upset pin at 16:01.

Rating: B. I didn’t see that coming and I was actually surprised by the pinfall. White losing outside of anything but a big match is weird and Sabin winning a major singles match almost feels even weirder. It was a heck of a match though with both guys looking as smooth as they ever did. That’s the good thing about seeing people like these two getting in the ring and they made it work very well. Match of the night so far.

Post match Steve Maclin comes in to go after Sabin but White pulls him off. Maclin goes after Sabin again but gets hit low, leaving Sabin to celebrate.

Sabin talks about beating White in an upset because no one expected him to win. Now White will never forget it.

Good Brothers vs. Briscoes

This is a few hours after the Briscoes had their instant classic against FTR. We get the Big Match Intros and you really can feel the energy when the Briscoes are in the ring. They just make things feel big and the charisma is off the charts. Mark and Anderson go to the mat to start but everything breaks down in a hurry.

Back in and Karl rakes Jay’s eyes to take over and we settle down with Jay being sent into the corner. Gallows stomps away and Anderson goes back to the eyes like a villain (I think?) should. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Jay is taken into the corner for some right hands from Anderson. That doesn’t last long either and the hot tag brings in Mark to clean house.

The Iconoclasm gets two on Anderson and Redneck Boogie (commentary didn’t seem to know the name) connects for the same. Everything breaks down and the reverse 3D gets two on Jay. Mark breaks up the Magic Killer and everyone is down again. It’s Mark getting up first and heading to the top but Chris Bey pops up to distract the referee. Cue Jay White to shove Mark off the top, setting up the Magic Killer for the pin at 9:45.

Rating: C+. They went fast here and a lot of that is probably due to the Briscoes being a bit gassed after their earlier match. What mattered here was giving the Bullet Club a win and it isn’t like the Briscoes lose much after a previous match and interference. They had a good match here though and the energy was high to end the night.

Deonna Purrazzo doesn’t care that Mercedes Martinez won the Interim Ring Of Honor Women’s Title earlier tonight (at a different show) and she doesn’t care who answers her Champ Champ Challenge tonight.

Here’s Deonna Purrazzo for the Champ Champ Challenger.

AAA Reina de Reinas Title: Faby Apache vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Purrazzo is defending and defeated Apache to win the title in the first place. I had been hoping for Mercedes Martinez or Taya Valkyrie but this was certainly a surprise. Feeling out process with Apache taking her down by the leg and some legsweeps give them two each. A slugout goes to Purrazzo but Apache takes her down into the corner to stomp away. Purrazzo is back with some arm cranking but can’t get the cross armbreaker. Apache grabs a suplex into a legdrop as the fans aren’t sure what to make of her.

La majistral gives Apache two as Rehwoldt continues to sing Purrazzo’s praises. Something like a reverse Figure Four has Purrazzo in trouble until she gets over to the rope. Purrazzo is back up with a standing moonsault for two but Apache grabs the Fairy Tale Ending for her own two. The Fujiwara armbar is broken up and they kick each other in the face for a double knockdown. Back up and Purrazzo hits a German suplex but can’t get the Queen’s Gambit. With that not working, Purrazzo pulls her into the armbar for the tap to retain at 8:56.

Rating: C. The problem here is that the fans didn’t know Apache and they didn’t react tot he match as a result. While Apache is someone who was a threat to the title, you need something to care about and that isn’t the case with someone popping into the promotion for the first time. The match wasn’t bad, but it had almost no heat and that dragged things down.

Post match Purrazzo grabs the mic and says it doesn’t matter who what Mercedes Martinez won earlier tonight because she is the Champ Champ….and here is Taya Valkyrie to interrupt. The fans welcome her back and Valkyrie says Purrazzo should be worried about that Reina de Reinas Title. Valkyrie will see her at Rebellion.

Purrazzo says Valkyrie can bring it.

Valkyrie is ready to win the Reina de Reinas Title and shut Purrazzo up.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Alex Shelley vs. Mike Bailey

Bailey was all over Wrestlemania Weekend and this is one of a handful of matches I saw from him. The fans aren’t sure who to cheer for here but both seem rather popular. They take about a minute to lock up with Shelley working on a wristlock. Bailey breaks that up fast and sends Shelley into the corner to give us a standoff. A whip into the ropes doesn’t get Shelley anywhere as bailey is back with his bouncing kicks to the arms into the enziguri.

Shelley is sent outside where he seems to injure and then fix his own shoulder. A jawbreaker works a bit better for Shelley and they head outside again with Shelley chopping away against the barricade. We pause for a Ric Flair strut and a top rope knee is driven into the chest back inside. Shelley hits a leg trap DDT for two and we hit the crossarm choke. Bailey fights up again and kicks him down, setting up the running corkscrew shooting star press for two.

Shelley pulls him down into the Motor City Stretch, sending Bailey over to the rope. They head to the apron (oh dear) where Bailey trips him down but misses his moonsault knees (freaking ow man). That lets Shelley hit a slingshot DDT, which mostly drives Bailey’s shoulder into the apron to knock him silly. A brainbuster on the floor drops Bailey again but he dives back in and sends Shelley outside.

That means a big springboard moonsault because selling isn’t a thing on this show. Back in and Shelley gets annoyed so the real fight is on. Bailey kicks him down and hits the Ultimate Weapon (standing moonsault double knees) for two. A quick Motor City Stretch attempt is countered into a rollup for two before Bailey bounces him off the rope for another rollup and the pin at 15:03.

Rating: B-. You knew you were going to get this kind of a match on the show and it worked well here, though Bailey taking those big moves and popping up to win a few moments later was more than I could reasonably take. That was a problem for him all weekend long and while it is the kind of thing that you have to expect, it still isn’t easy to see over and over.

Overall Rating: B. This was more or less the Multiverse Of Matches show (minus the Knockouts Tag Team Title match) with Josh’s intros and some short promos added. It’s a pretty entertaining show and a nice way to take a breather after Wrestlemania Weekend. Rebellion can have its final push next week and they did advance enough on this show too. All in all, not a must see show, but worth a look if you don’t have time for the full Multiverse show.

 

 

 

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Multiverse Of Matches
Date: April 1, 2022
Location: Fairmont Hotel, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

This was a show that got my attention as it has a pretty nice card with a lot of things going on. The idea is that there are multiple companies coming together with some representatives for some matches we might not have seen before. That should be enough, even if this is just a side trip on the way to Rebellion. Let’s get to it.

I was in attendance for this show, sitting opposite the entrance in the fifth row center.

The opening video runs down the card.

X-Division Title: Jordynne Grace vs. Chris Bey vs. Blake Christian vs. Vincent vs. Rich Swann vs. Trey Miguel

Miguel is defending in Ultimate X and Swann busts out a Scott Hall pose for a great moment. It’s a group attempt to crawl across the ropes to start but that is all broken up. The audio gets a lot louder as Miguel is left alone, only to be pulled down by Swann and Bey. That means a three way exchange of strikes to the face with bey getting the better of things.

Grace is back in with a MuscleBuster to Bey but Christian clears the ring out again. Miguel takes Christian down though and goes up, only to get pulled down by Vincent. That earns Vincent a cutter from Swann, who is pulled down by Bey rather quickly. Bey plants Swann with the Art of Finesse so Christian goes up, only to drop does onto Bey with a Canadian Destroyer. Instead of climbing though, Christian hits a big flip dive onto the pile. It’s Grace going across the cables and using her legs, only to get knocked down by Miguel. That’s enough for Miguel to grab the title and retain at 7:25.

Rating: B-. This was one of those things where I’ve seen a bunch of Ultimate X matches over the years and a lot of them run together. The climbing was the focus here again as it tends to be, though it was a lot of two people do their thing and then some others take their place. Fun match, but if you’ve seen a few of these, you’ve seen them all.

Here’s what’s coming on the rest of the card as the structure is taken apart.

Earlier today, the Good Brothers promised to take the Briscoes out to even their career series.

Matt Cardona/Chelsea Green vs. Nick Aldis/Mickie James

Green turned on James and Cardona took her out, so James brought in Aldis for a battle of married teams. The girls get in a brawl to start but we settle down to Aldis pounding on Cardona on the mat and in the corner. Mickie comes in but gets taken down by Cardona’s clothesline to put her in trouble. It’s off to Green to choke in the corner and forearm away, setting up the chinlock to keep James down.

The Reboot misses for Cardona though and Mickie grabs a flapjack, allowing the hot tag off to Aldis. The clothesline comeback is on, setting up a Tombstone. There’s a top rope elbow but Green makes the save as everything breaks down. Cardona has to save Green from the King’s Lynn Cloverleaf but she gets sent outside anyway. Back in and stereo King’s Lynn Cloverleafs make Cardona and Green tap at the same time at 8:00.

Rating: C. I remember this being a bit longer in person but it still worked out well enough. There is a simple story here with the two married couples going at it over one of them being attacked a few weeks ago. Aldis continues to look like a star, though he might be a bit dull, and James has been a legend for years. Green has come a long way and Cardona…my goodness he has had a career renaissance in the last year or so and it has been a lot of fun to watch.

Aldis motions that he wants the NWA World Title back. Or maybe the Impact Digital Media Title.

Deonna Purrazzo doesn’t care that Mercedes Martinez won the Interim Ring Of Honor Women’s Title earlier tonight (at a different show) and she doesn’t care who answers her Champ Champ Challenge tonight.

Alex Shelley vs. Mike Bailey

Bailey was all over Wrestlemania Weekend and this is one of a handful of matches I saw from him. The fans aren’t sure who to cheer for here but both seem rather popular. They take about a minute to lock up with Shelley working on a wristlock. Bailey breaks that up fast and sends Shelley into the corner to give us a standoff. A whip into the ropes doesn’t get Shelley anywhere as bailey is back with his bouncing kicks to the arms into the enziguri.

Shelley is sent outside where he seems to injure and then fix his own shoulder. A jawbreaker works a bit better for Shelley and they head outside again with Shelley chopping away against the barricade. We pause for a Ric Flair strut and a top rope knee is driven into the chest back inside. Shelley hits a leg trap DDT for two and we hit the crossarm choke. Bailey fights up again and kicks him down, setting up the running corkscrew shooting star press for two.

Shelley pulls him down into the Motor City Stretch, sending Bailey over to the rope. They head to the apron (oh dear) where Bailey trips him down but misses his moonsault knees (freaking ow man). That lets Shelley hit a slingshot DDT, which mostly drives Bailey’s shoulder into the apron to knock him silly. A brainbuster on the floor drops Bailey again but he dives back in and sends Shelley outside.

That means a big springboard moonsault because selling isn’t a thing on this show. Back in and Shelley gets annoyed so the real fight is on. Bailey kicks him down and hits the Ultimate Weapon (standing moonsault double knees) for two. A quick Motor City Stretch attempt is countered into a rollup for two before Bailey bounces him off the rope for another rollup and the pin at 15:03.

Rating: B-. You knew you were going to get this kind of a match on the show and it worked well here, though Bailey taking those big moves and popping up to win a few moments later was more than I could reasonably take. That was a problem for him all weekend long and while it is the kind of thing that you have to expect, it still isn’t easy to see over and over.

The Influence isn’t worried about their Tag Team Title defense. Madison Rayne is reminded of one of her favorite quotes: “Everyone else sucks and we’re the Knockouts Tag Team Champions.” Who said that you ask? Tenille Dashwood of course. All three of the teams are going to hate each other or not get along so they should be fine.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: Decay vs. Lady Frost/Gisele Shaw vs. Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans vs. Influence

Influence is defending and there are actually no seconds here. Shaw and Frost are replacing the IInspiration, who are missing for no apparent reason. Rosemary and Steelz start things off but Steelz hands it off to Evans before anything happens. A dropkick to the leg takes Evans down so Rosemary can bite her head, only to get knocked into the corner. Evans hiptosses Steelz into her for two but Shaw tags herself in.

Something like Natural Selection gets two on Steelz and it’s off to Frost for Cryme Tyme’s old G9 of all things. Instead of covering, they let Steelz tag in Havok for the wrecking on Frost. Rosemary adds the spear before handing it off to Dashwood for the stomping. A northern lights suplex gives Rayne two and Steelz has to make the save after a neckbreaker.

Frost kicks her way to freedom so it’s off to Havok vs. Rayne, with no one interested in Rayne’s offer of a tag. Everything breaks down as we hit the parade of secondary finishers, leaving everyone down. Evans/Steelz and Decay fight to the floor, leaving Frost and Shaw to kick the champs down together. Frost gets knocked off the top though and a double Stroke is enough to retain the titles at 9:03.

Rating: C. What else were you expecting from a match like this? There are eight women fighting to get ring time and no one is going to get the chance to shine. The titles still don’t mean much and it is hard to imagine anyone but the IInspiration taking the Influence down. At least they weren’t out there long and the match wasn’t awful, but it isn’t like these things ever work that well.

Eddie Edwards is here representing Pro Wrestling Noah because they didn’t turn their backs on him. He is in his old school green and is ready to prove himself to Tomohiro Ishii.

Eddie Edwards vs. Tomohiro Ishii

Feeling out process to start with Edwards backing him up against the ropes to no avail. An exchange of shoulders (eventually) goes to Ishii but he is sent outside for the suicide dive. Ishii gets sent into the barricade but he is fine enough to hit a powerslam to drive Edwards into the floor. A DDT onto the apron rocks Ishii for two and Eddie is starting to get cocky.

That’s not a good idea against Ishii, who hits a suplex and unloads in the corner to take over. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets Eddie out of trouble for two and he kicks Ishii in the head in the corner. The Backpack Stunner is broken up so they trade snap German suplexes and clotheslines for a double knockdown.

Back up and Edwards starts striking away in the corner, earning a glare from Ishii and a YOU CENSORED UP chant from the crowd. Ishii hammers away but the sliding lariat is blocked and Edwards knees away. The Boston Knee Party is blocked and Ishii hits a running knee of his own. Edwards blocks the brainbuster and tries the Die Hard Driver but Ishii slips out. The big clothesline sets up the brainbuster to give Ishii the pin at 14:58.

Rating: B-. This felt like the match where they beat each other up until one of them just couldn’t get up again. That is a formula that will always work well enough, though it didn’t quite hit the highest point here. Ishii isn’t what he used to be but he is still good enough to get by on a combination of reputation and skill. If nothing else, it is nice to see a first time match that felt special, which is the point of this show.

We recap PCO/Moose vs. Josh Alexander/Jonah. This is double fallout from Sacrifice where Alexander returned to go after Moose and Jonah injured PCO. There is nothing wrong with combining two feuds and this should be a hard hitting fight.

Jonah/Josh Alexander vs. PCO/Moose

PCO jumps Alexander to start and knocks him into the corner. Alexander gets in a kick to the face though and it’s Jonah coming in, albeit after glaring at Alexander a bit (with commentary pointing out their previous issues). It’s off to Moose for the showdown with Jonah, but about ten shoulders won’t put Jonah down. One big shoulder does put Moose down, though Alexander tags himself back in to chase Moose around the ring.

PCO cuts Alexander off and it’s a double whip to send Alexander into the barricade. Back in and PCO drops his middle rope leg and Moose starts stomping on Alexander’s wrist. Alexander is able to grab a suplex on PCO but he’s back up to knock Jonah off the apron before the tag. The second attempt works just fine though and it’s Jonah coming in to clean house.

That doesn’t last long as the big backsplash misses and Alexander is already back in. Everything breaks down and PCO hits his big flip dive to the floor, setting up the Deanimator on Alexander. Back in and Jonah hits a superkick on PCO, leaving Alexander to blast Moose with a clothesline. We get the BOO/YAY slugout with Moose and Alexander until Moose bails from the threat of the C4 Spike. The Spike hits PCO instead for the pin at 12:48.

Rating: C+. Sometimes you need four big, strong guys to beat on each other for a little while. That is what we got here and it was entertaining while it lasted. That’s about all you can ask for here and they even built up Moose vs. Alexander at Rebellion. Throw in some fun interactions and this was about as good of a use of their time as they could have had.

Mickie James and Gail Kim are running something called Dresselmania II which seems to be some kind of charity deal. Cool.

Here’s Deonna Purrazzo for the Champ Champ Challenger.

AAA Reina de Reinas Title: Faby Apache vs. Deonna Purrazzo

Purrazzo is defending and defeated Apache to win the title in the first place. I had been hoping for Mercedes Martinez or Taya Valkyrie but this was certainly a surprise. Feeling out process with Apache taking her down by the leg and some legsweeps give them two each. A slugout goes to Purrazzo but Apache takes her down into the corner to stomp away. Purrazzo is back with some arm cranking but can’t get the cross armbreaker. Apache grabs a suplex into a legdrop as the fans aren’t sure what to make of her.

La majistral gives Apache two as Rehwoldt continues to sing Purrazzo’s praises. Something like a reverse Figure Four has Purrazzo in trouble until she gets over to the rope. Purrazzo is back up with a standing moonsault for two but Apache grabs the Fairy Tale Ending for her own two. The Fujiwara armbar is broken up and they kick each other in the face for a double knockdown. Back up and Purrazzo hits a German suplex but can’t get the Queen’s Gambit. With that not working, Purrazzo pulls her into the armbar for the tap to retain at 8:56.

Rating: C. The problem here is that the fans didn’t know Apache and they didn’t react tot he match as a result. While Apache is someone who was a threat to the title, you need something to care about and that isn’t the case with someone popping into the promotion for the first time. The match wasn’t bad, but it had almost no heat and that dragged things down.

Post match Purrazzo grabs the mic and says it doesn’t matter who what Mercedes Martinez won earlier tonight because she is the Champ Champ….and here is Taya Valkyrie to interrupt. The fans welcome her back and Valkyrie says Purrazzo should be worried about that Reina de Reinas Title. Valkyrie will see her at Rebellion.

We recap Jay White vs. Chris Sabin. They have met each other time after time and now it is Sabin’s chance to prove himself.

Chris Sabin vs. Jay White

White is a bit popular around here. A chop against the ropes wakes Sabin up to start and another hurts White’s own hand. Sabin grabs him by the arm and takes him down to the mat before grabbing an armdrag into a chop of his own. White is sent outside for the suicide dive and then gets dropped face first onto the apron. Back in and White catches him on top, setting up another chop out to the floor.

A pair of belly to back drops onto the apron have Sabin in more trouble and the half crab goes on back inside. With that broken up, White hits a backbreaker into a waistlock to stay on the back/ribs. Sabin fights up and hits a shot to the ribs of his own before another good one puts White down. Some elbows to the back of the head set up a missile dropkick to give Sabin two as his chest is a scary shade of purple.

White is back up with a snap DDT for two and a Saito suplex drops Sabin again. A swinging suplex gets two more and it’s White’s turn to be frustrated. The swinging Rock Bottom plants Sabin for another near fall and White is annoyed at the referee (the same one who allegedly messed up in the tag match last week).

Sabin counters the Blade Runner into a ram into the corner but White goes back to the damaged chest. That just fires Sabin up for some, ahem, machine gun style chops to put White down for a change. There’s the hard clothesline but the Cradle Shock is blocked. White tries the Blade Runner again, only to get rolled up to give Sabin the upset pin at 16:01.

Rating: B. I didn’t see that coming and I was actually surprised by the pinfall. White losing outside of anything but a big match is weird and Sabin winning a major singles match almost feels even weirder. It was a heck of a match though with both guys looking as smooth as they ever did. That’s the good thing about seeing people like these two getting in the ring and they made it work very well. Match of the night so far.

Post match Steve Maclin comes in to go after Sabin but White pulls him off. Maclin goes after Sabin again but gets hit low, leaving Sabin to celebrate.

Good Brothers vs. Briscoes

This is a few hours after the Briscoes had their instant classic against FTR. We get the Big Match Intros and you really can feel the energy when the Briscoes are in the ring. They just make things feel big and the charisma is off the charts. Mark and Anderson go to the mat to start but everything breaks down in a hurry.

Back in and Karl rakes Jay’s eyes to take over and we settle down with Jay being sent into the corner. Gallows stomps away and Anderson goes back to the eyes like a villain (I think?) should. The chinlock goes on for a bit before Jay is taken into the corner for some right hands from Anderson. That doesn’t last long either and the hot tag brings in Mark to clean house.

The Iconoclasm gets two on Anderson and Redneck Boogie (commentary didn’t seem to know the name) connects for the same. Everything breaks down and the reverse 3D gets two on Jay. Mark breaks up the Magic Killer and everyone is down again. It’s Mark getting up first and heading to the top but Chris Bey pops up to distract the referee. Cue Jay White to shove Mark off the top, setting up the Magic Killer for the pin at 9:45.

Rating: C+. They went fast here and a lot of that is probably due to the Briscoes being a bit gassed after their earlier match. What mattered here was giving the Bullet Club a win and it isn’t like the Briscoes lose much after a previous match and interference. They had a good match here though and the energy was high to end the night.

The Bullet Club poses on the stage to end the show.

After the show, the Briscoes called that a bunch of BOLOGNA (Mark’s word) and promised to be back in Impact.

Overall Rating: B-. This might not have been an instant classic, but it was a fun night and one of the shows I had been looking forward to leading up to the weekend. Impact continues to be good when they are able to focus on the wrestling itself and this time they were able to mix things up a bit and have a fun show. Rebellion is the show that mattered, but this was the lighter show and they made that work rather well.

 

 

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 31, 2022
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s the go home show for the Multiverse of Matches but that doesn’t seem to mean much at the moment. Part of the issue is that we also need to build up Rebellion, which is less than a month away. That doesn’t leave Impact a lot of time, though maybe they can give this week’s show some attention of its own. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Josh Alexander vs. Moose as they are on their way to a showdown at Rebellion for Moose’s World Title. Just to crank it up, Moose SPEARED ALEXANDER’S WIFE at a show in Canada over the weekend.

Josh Alexander arrives and Scott D’Amore tells him that while Moose isn’t here, he has recommended that Moose be stripped of the title and fired. Alexander grabs him by the jacket and says he needs Moose in the ring so he can take the title from him, man to man.

Opening sequence.

Jonathan Gresham vs. Kenny King

Non-title. Before the match, Gresham mentioned that he will be facing Eddie Edwards at Rebellion, but King’s entrance cuts him off. King talks about how he sees a great wrestler but a puppet for Ring of Honor. Gresham should be part of Honor No More, but he is called the Octopus because he is all arms and no brains.

They get in each others’ faces to start and we have a rather aggressive lockup. As expected, Gresham goes after the arm to put King in trouble before sending him outside. King manages to snap Gresham’s throat across the top to take over though and a suplex on the floor makes it worse. Back in and Gresham grabs a dragon screw legwhip, only to miss a high crossbody and bang up his own knee.

We take a break and come back with King hitting a spinebuster for two but Gresham goes right back to the knee. A dragon suplex into a tiger driver gives King two more but King’s knee gives out again. You don’t have to ask Gresham twice to grab a hold so the Figure Four goes on. Gresham stands up to crank on it even more and that’s enough for the tap at 12:04.

Rating: C+. There is something so entertaining about watching Gresham take someone apart and put them in pin in a variety of ways. That is exactly what we got here, with that adjusted Figure Four being a nice twist on what you might have expected. King was good as usual, but this was more about Gresham, as it should have been.

Post match Eddie Edwards runs in to go after Gresham but Rocky Romero makes the save, meaning we probably have a tag match coming up.

Here’s what’s coming at Multiverse of Matches and later tonight.

The Motor City Machine Guns are ready for their rematch with the Bullet Club because Jay White should know what it means to get pinned.

Deonna Purrazzo is ready for another Champ Champ Challenge at the Multiverse of Matches and there are a ton of possible challengers.

Johnny Swinger/Zicky Dice vs. ???/???

This is Swinger’s Chump Chump Challenger and the opponents are…the Good Brothers. Dice immediately starts panicking and Gallows sends him flying with a fall away slam. The Magic Killer finishes at 51 seconds. As it should have been.

Post match the Good Brothers say they are back to what they do best. They’re on the way to Rebellion and the eight team elimination match, plus the Multiverse of Matches against the Briscoes. We cut over to PCO in the parking lot, screaming for Jonah. Cue Jonah to jump him from behind and the brawl is on, using a variety of parking lot accessories.

Jonah powerbombs him onto some wooden pallets and then gets in a few shots with a sledgehammer (as you do). A brick is placed on PCO’s ribs and cracked with the hammer but he grabs Jonah by the throat. Jonah’s head is crushed in a car door and PCO buries him underneath some dirt. That’s just something he happened to have laying around right?

Josh Alexander vs. Madman Fulton

Ace Austin is here with Fulton. Alexander wastes no time in starting with the suplexes before knocking Fulton outside. Fulton is sent into the barricade but manages to fight out of the C4 Spike back inside. The chokeslam is countered into a powerbomb though and an ankle lock makes Fulton tap at 1:49. That was quick.

Post match Austin teases going after Alexander but gets scared off. Alexander cranks on Fulton’s ankle so hard that Fulton’s boot comes off.

Trey Miguel asks Mike Bailey about his relationship with Ace Austin. Bailey says expect the unexpected.

Last week, Mickie James ranted about Chelsea Green turning on her, making Green a sellout just like Matt Cardona. Nick Aldis will be at the Multiverse of Matches, where it’s the Midcardonas vs. Al-Dis.

Matt Cardona doesn’t want to talk about this but Chelsea Green doesn’t like the idea of Mickie James treating her like the little sister.

Knockouts Battle Royal

Madison Rayne, Tenille Dashwood, Lady Frost, Gisele Shaw, Jordynne Grace, Havok, Alisha Edwards, Rosemary, Savannah Evans, Jesse McKay

The winner gets a Knockouts Title shot against Tasha Steelz, on commentary, at Rebellion. It’s a brawl to start (battle royal and all), though the IInfluence has time to stop and pose. Edwards actually forearms away at Havok, only to have Rosemary cut her down with a spear. Havok tosses Edwards and saves Rosemary from Evans. Everyone gets together to dump Havok and McKay gets rid of Dashwood.

McKay gets knocked off the apron but Kaleb With A K catches her. Rayne is out as well as McKay is thrown in, where she gets caught in a Samoan drop from Evans. That’s it for McKay and it’s Evans vs. Grace in the power slugout. Grace is tossed but Shaw and Frost toss Evans too. That leaves with with Frost, Shaw and Rosemary with Shaw getting the better of things. The other two get together and dump Shaw, with Rosemary knocking out Frost as well for the win at 7:15.

Rating: C-. Rosemary is one of those women that you can throw right into the title picture and no one will think anything is out of the ordinary as she really is that good. She has the resume and the status so this should work out well. I don’t know if she wins the title, but she is someone who very well could and that is a good choice for a challenger.

Black Taurus b. Deaner on BTI.

Eric Young and Violent By Design is ready to retain the Tag Team Titles at Rebellion.

Bhupinder Gujjar vs. Aiden Prince

Brian Myers has his own commentary table again. Headlocks and shoulders don’t work for Prince to start as Gujjar knocks him to the floor. That’s enough for Price to try walking out, only to get tossed back in without much effort. A powerslam gives Gujjar two but Prince gets in a knee to the back to take over. Gujjar comes right back with a Sling Blade into a powerslam for two but Prince hits a suplex. Prince misses a 450 though and the middle rope spear gives Gujjar the pin at 4:36.

Rating: C-. Another week, another Gujjar match as he has a cool looking finisher which takes some effort to set up. Other than that though, there is still almost nothing about Gujjar that makes him interesting. He’s a guy in tights for most of his matches and it doesn’t make me want to see anything that he is doing.

Post match W. Morrissey tries to powerbomb Myers through the table but Prince gets in the way. That means Prince gets the powerbomb through the table instead.

Masha Slamovich vs. Abby Jane

Tiger suplex and Snowplow finish for Slamovich in 48 seconds.

We run down the Multiverse of Matches card again.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Bullet Club

Chris Bey/Jay White for the Club here. White shoulders Sabin in the corner to start but Sabin is back with a middle rope spinning crossbody. Shelley tags himself in and a neck snap over the ropes sets up a legsweep to put White in trouble. A backsplash/knee drop combination sets up a chinlock as commentary goes over some of the possibilities for the eight team gauntlet match at Rebellion. Bey sneaks in with a shot off the top to drop Sabin and we take a break.

Back with Sabin not being able to crawl over to Shelley, meaning Bey can get in some smirking. White gets in some shots of his own but a pair of leapfrogs allows Sabin to get over to Shelley. The Motor City Stretch has Bey in trouble until White makes the save and Bey returns the favor by breaking up Thunder Express.

Back to back choking on the ropes has Shelley in more trouble and he gets tossed outside. Bey’s suicide dive hits White though and it’s back to Sabin for the flip dive off the apron. They head back inside with Sabin hitting a bunch of running dropkicks in the corner to both Clubbites, setting up Thunder Express for two on Bey. White is back up to clear the ring though and Bey hits a big running flip dive to the floor.

Bey’s top rope splash gets two with Shelley making the save, which the referee is fine with this time. That doesn’t go well with White but he and Shelley go outside. Sabin drops Bey to set up Skull and Bones for two, followed by the Dream Sequence to White. Made In Detroit is broken up so White hits Sabin with a half and half suplex. The Art of Finesse gives Bey the pin at 17:42.

Rating: B. I don’t think there was much doubt in the ending after the previous screwy(ish) ending but they had a heck of a match on the way there. The Guns aren’t going to be hurt by a loss and the Club needed the win a bit more here. Very good match between two talented teams and it is nice to see Bey getting the pin in a pretty high profile match. He has come a long way and now he is having some success to back it up.

Overall Rating: C+. As has been the case, they continue to have issues with building towards two shows at once, even though the Multiverse of Matches feels like a quick pit stop on the way to the important event. Still though, they had a good main event and I want to see where things are going with Rebellion, which is the main point of this show. The main event is worth seeing if you have the time and Multiverse of Madness looks good so…success?

Results
Jonathan Gresham b. Kenny King – Standing Figure Four Leglock
Good Brothers b. Johnny Swinger/Zicky Dice – Magic Killer to Dice
Josh Alexander b. Madman Fulton – Ankle lock
Rosemary won a battle royal last eliminating Lady Frost
Bhupinder Gujjar b. Aiden Prince – Middle rope spear
Masha Slamovich b. Abby Jane – Snowplow
Bullet Club b. Motor City Machine Guns – Art of Finesse to Sabin

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 22, 2007
Location: Qwest Center, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Cyber Sunday and…well to be fair I’ve missed a few weeks so I have almost no idea what is going on at the moment. The big story on the Raw side is Randy Orton defending the Raw World Title against Shawn Michaels, Jeff Hardy or Mr. Kennedy. Odds are this week is going to be about moving us closer to the inevitable so. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Mr. Kennedy is in the ring to get things going. He knows there is a decision for the fans to make about this Sunday so let’s look at the candidates. First up, you have Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy, who is like Hilary Clinton. They have the blond hair and the famous last name, but just like Clinton, Hardy won’t be able to get the job done because he has no testicular fortitude. Then you have Shawn Michaels, who is like Rudy Giuliani. They both talk well and have a resume, but they both live in the past.

What has Shawn done for him lately? Whatever it is, it is nowhere near as impressive as what Kennedy has done. Kennedy lists off everything he has done in the last year or so and kind of quotes John F. Kennedy, asking what you can do for him. Cue Jeff Hardy in the crowd though, where he has found out that Kennedy’s approval rating sucks. Kennedy says Hardy doesn’t want to get into this with him, but the fans seem to think otherwise.

Hardy lists off Kennedy’s failures, which would include failing at Cyber Sunday too. Kennedy goes to leave but Hardy gets the vote to go beat him up right now. The fight is on but Randy Orton runs in as well, meaning the villains can take Jeff down. Shawn Michaels runs in and we probably have a tag match later tonight. Orton and Shawn fight off, leaving Jeff to clear Kennedy out.

Mickie James/Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch/Melina

London headlock takeovers Cade down to start before going to an armbar. Mickie and Melina come in for a double hair takedown so it’s quickly off to Kendrick to slug away on Murdoch. Cade drops Murdoch down into a legdrop on Kendrick but a kick to the head allows the hot tag to London. Everything breaks down and Cade clotheslines Murdoch by mistake. London adds a running shooting star press for the pin.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the time to get very far but I can always go with tying two feuds together into one match. If nothing else, it was an excuse to have Melina vs. Mickie without actually having the two in a singles match, as Cade/Murdoch vs. London/Kendrick has kind of been done to death at this point. Way too short to be worth much though.

The Diva Search girls did an interrogation competition on the beach. Remember when wrestlers worked on this show?

Shawn Michaels comes in to see Jeff Hardy and talks about how much he needs to face Randy Orton at Cyber Sunday. Hardy suggests that the fans might want champion vs. champion though. Various threats seem to be made, even though they’re partners tonight.

Cody Rhodes is reading WWE Magazine when Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas come in to make fun of him for losing to Hardcore Holly. Rhodes says at least Holly looks good with blond hair, so Shelton is ready to face him tonight. Benjamin says after the match, he’ll dye Cody’s hair so he can be a thinner, less talented version of his old man. Haas: “Oh snap!”

Coach is with William Regal, who isn’t sure about making Coach vs. Hornswoggle. After some recapping, Regal does make the match, but Coach has a better idea: Hornswoggle vs. Umaga. Sure.

Cody Rhodes vs. Shelton Benjamin

Charlie Haas is here with Benjamin. Cody gets taken down to start with Benjamin going right after the leg. The comeback is cut off with a shinbreaker but Cody grabs a bulldog out of the corner for two. Haas’ distraction completely fails as Cody reverses a rollup into one of his own for the fast pin.

Post match the double teaming is on until Hardcore Holly runs in for the save. Holly seems a bit impressed.

Here is the debuting DH Smith, the son of the British Bulldog, who is dedicating his first match to his father.

DH Smith vs. Carlito

Carlito goes after the arm to start but gets taken down into a jackknife cover for two. An overhead belly to belly gives Smith one but Carlito is back with a springboard dropkick for two of his own. The double arm crank goes on before a springboard elbow drops Smith again. That doesn’t make much of a difference as Smith is back with a running powerslam for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another match that didn’t get much time, but in this case that isn’t a terrible thing. Smith got to go in, beat up Carlito, and get out before anyone could see anything wrong with him. That’s a nice way to debut, as Carlito still has a bit of value to him. Granted the name DH Smith isn’t going to do him any favors, but he was good enough here.

Candice Michelle and Beth Phoenix have a weird staredown, with Phoenix promising to make her get on her knees and worship. Michelle promises to get the title back.

We recap Hornswoggle blowing up Coach last week, complete with comedic sound effects.

Hornswoggle vs. Umaga

Hold on as Hornswoggle runs off, with HHH taking his place. The big brawl is on with referees having to break it up but not doing the best job. Eventually the two are separated, only to have HHH break through again. No match obviously.

Post break, Umaga is surrounded by agents and referees and yells a lot.

Todd Grisham is on the stage and introduces us to the three Diva Search finalists. Lena is eliminated, leaving us with Eve and Brooke. They both get thirty seconds to hype themselves up for next week’s finals, which involves shouting about Omaha a lot.

Randy Orton comes in to see Mr. Kennedy, who can be his partner tonight but no one is going to vote for him because bad guys don’t win. Kennedy agrees they can be partners but he might have to make a statement after the match. See you out there…..partner.

Santino Marella vs. Ron Simmons

Maria is here with Santino, who doesn’t like not being mentioned in the 500th issue of WWE Magazine. MANTAUR is even mentioned….and we’re cut off by the SAVE US video. Santino thinks that might have been Steve Austin, who must be comfortable at home, watching himself in the Condemned. If Austin ever does show up, Santino will open a can of the a** whip. Simmons comes in and hammers away but Santino gets in a shot of his own for two. The chinlock doesn’t last long so Santino kicks him low for the DQ.

HHH doesn’t care what kind of a match he has with Umaga on Sunday because tonight, he saw doubt in Umaga’s eyes. On Sunday, he’ll see fear, because no matter how the voting goes, it’s time to play the game.

Women’s Title: Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix

Phoenix is defending in a 2/3 falls match. They lock up to start until Beth sends her out to the apron. A hurricanrana gets Candice out of trouble but Beth grabs her by the throat and drops her down for the first fall. We take a break and come back with Beth putting on something like a Liontamer.

Candice slips out and the slugout is on, setting up a discus lariat for two. A spinwheel kick gets the same so Candice goes up, only to get knocked down…where she lands on her face. You can hear the crowd go quiet as Beth drags her out of the corner (which is a REALLY STUPID IDEA) and pins her (with the referee audibly telling Candice not to kick out) to retain. Not enough shown to rate due to the injury and the break but I can’t imagine this was going to be anything but Beth retaining. The injury looked horrible though and that is probably going to put Candice on the shelf for a long time.

Beth leaves and Candice gets treatment but can’t stay sitting up. A stretcher takes her out, due to what would wind up being a broken collarbone.

Jeff Hardy/Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. Kennedy/Randy Orton

Shawn and Kennedy start things off with Shawn shrugging off some chops in the corner. It’s quickly off to Jeff to work on Kennedy’s arm, setting up a middle rope elbow to the back. The charge in the corner misses though and Orton comes in to pound away with some right hands. A clothesline gives Orton two but Hardy kicks Kennedy in the face and dives over for the tag. Some of the house is cleaned but Shawn gets taken into the wrong corner so Orton can take over again.

Kennedy comes back in and grabs the seated abdominal stretch for a little longer than you might have expected. Back to back backbreakers give Kennedy two and an elbow to the face gets the same. It’s back to Orton for the slow stomping and a knee to the back keeps Shawn down. Orton pulls him into a chinlock with a bodyscissors but Shawn fights up with an enziguri. The double tag brings in Hardy and Kennedy with the pace picking up. Everything breaks down and Shawn slingshots down onto Orton, leaving Hardy to Twist Kennedy’s fate. The Swanton gives Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was a bit above average main event style tag match and that shouldn’t be a surprise. I don’t think there’s any secret to the fact that Shawn is getting the title shot on Sunday so the ending was little more than misdirection, but they had a good match on the way there. Kennedy just kind of exists to give Orton a partner, but they had worse options.

Post match Shawn superkicks Orton to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Cyber Sunday is such a weird show to build towards as WWE doesn’t really have matches to set up. Instead, you have a bunch of options to pick from, which makes for some odd final shows. The fact that this one included an injury and more Hornswoggle shenanigans and it wasn’t exactly a great way to get me into the pay per view.

 

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 24, 2022
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re on the way to the Multiverse of Matches and the interesting twist is that Josh Alexander is now dealing with Honor No More. That opens up some doors, but all roads lead to Moose vs. Alexander for the title at Rebellion in about a month. There are some other things to cover as well so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Here is a ticked off Josh Alexander to address Moose invading his home last week. Moose intimidated his wife and came through his door and that is too far. He isn’t here just as a professional wrestler but as a husband and a father who is ready to take the World Title from Moose. Since Moose has no problem coming to his home, how about he comes to his home in Impact Wrestling.

Cue Moose, who says Alexander failed to protect his family and at Rebellion, he is going to fail to win the title. Moose offers to show Alexander’s son how to be a man and that’s too far, meaning the fight is on. They fight backstage and into the set until security breaks it up, much to Alexander’s annoyance.

Post break Scott D’Amore tries to calm Alexander down and actually pulls it off.

We run down the Multiverse of Matches card.

X-Division Title Match Qualifying Match: Willie Mack vs. Laredo Kid vs. Mike Bailey

We start with a three way lockup before back to back to back hurricanranas leave Bailey and Kid on the floor. Mack hits a big running flip dive and we take a break. Back with Mack chopping Bailey down but he’s right back up with the rapid fire kicks. A right hand puts Bailey on the floor though, only to have Kid hit a springboard corkscrew dive.

Back in and Kid’s frog splash gets two on Bailey but Mack hits Kid with a pop up right hand. The Samoan drop into the standing moonsault hits Bailey for two so Mack hits a Razor’s Edge (with pose) on Kid. Bailey makes the save and a double cover gets a double two. Kid is sent outside though and the Ultimate Weapon finishes Mack at 10:06.

Rating: C+. They know the formula that works here and it was on display here too. What matters here is getting the audience warmed up and they did rather well with this one. Bailey seems to be the next big project for the X-Division and it wouldn’t shock me to see him leave Rebellion with the title. Mack and Kid will be fine with the loss, though it would be nice to see them both win something.

Bullet Club isn’t happy with the referee’s decision last week so next week they’ll face the Motor City Machine Guns again. As for tonight, the Good Brothers are winning the Tag Team Titles, which belong to them.

Mahabali Shera b. Crazzy Steve on BTI.

Raj Singh is happy with Shera and pain is promised.

Steve Maclin vs. Heath

Rhino is here with Heath. Maclin takes him up against the ropes for a shot to the face before going after the eye. That leaves Maclin open to go outside, where he shakes the steps, goes down and grabs his knee. That’s enough for Rhino to get ejected, leaving Heath to get caught with a backbreaker. Heath gets tied in the Tree of Woe for the running shoulder and two but Heath gets in some boots to the face. The comeback is on, including an inverted DDT for two. The Wake Up Call is blocked though and Maclin grabs a rollup with feet on the ropes for the pin at 4:51.

Rating: D+. The Maclin push continues and while I like that, there wasn’t much to be seen here. This was just a step above a squash and there was no way that Heath was going to beat him. I was worried that Maclin would be dropped after his big Team Impact swerve but they have found something else for him here and that is nice to see.

Post match Rhino comes back in to Gore Maclin.

We get the return of All About Me with Tenille Dashwood, complete with Kaleb With A K. To make it more interesting though, he’s the host this week! Kaleb With A K asks how she’s doing but Dashwood wants to know about his loyalty. He’s totally with the IInfluence but his neck starts hurting and he has to leave.

And now, Locker Room Talk, featuring Kaleb With A K! Dashwood follows him in and again he is asked about his loyalty. He again says he’s with the IInfluence…who want a lie detector test. Show over.

Tomohiro Ishii is at Multiverse of Matches.

Jonah is ready for Ishii and will be his personal kaiju.

Tag Team Titles: Good Brothers vs. Violent By Design

The Brothers are challenging in a lumberjack match, with Joe Doering and Eric Young for the champs. Doering and Gallows get things going because Impact really likes this pairing. Everything breaks down in a hurry with the champs being knocked to the floor. That doesn’t last long so it’s off to Anderson for the spinebuster to Young and a near fall. Young is back with a neckbreaker for two, allowing Doering to come back in for some choking.

Anderson fights out of a neck crank and a jawbreaker allows the hot tag back to Gallows. The reverse 3D gets two on Young but Doering comes back in to cut things off. A powerslam sets up Young’s top rope elbow for two but Gallows comes in for the Magic Killer. Doering offers a distraction though and everything breaks down again. Mike Bennett sneaks in with a low blow and Matt Taven hits the Climax, allowing Young to pin Gallows at 7:26.

Rating: C. This feud has been going on long enough now and it makes sense to move on to the Good Brothers vs. Honor No More. The Brothers still aren’t interesting but the loss of the titles helps makes things a bit better. I like Honor No More getting something fresh here, as like them or not, the Good Brothers are an upgrade over what the group has been doing.

Tasha Steelz isn’t worried about Mickie James and doesn’t know why she would leave Savannah Evans in the back for their street fight tonight.

Eddie Edwards vs. Rocky Romero

The fans are behind Rocky here (shocking) as they grapple up against the ropes. Romero takes him down by the arm but Edwards pops back up for a waistlock. A headlock takeover sends us to a technical off on the mat before some shoulders don’t get Romero anywhere. Instead Edwards wins a chop off (not fair as he’s wearing a shirt) and they head outside, only to have Romero hit a running hurricanrana off the steps.

We take a break and come back with Romero starting up the Forever Clotheslines. As usual it’s false advertising as Edwards breaks it up, only to get pulled into the Diablo armbar. That’s broken up so they head outside again, this time with Edwards sending him into the apron over and over. Back in and Romero hits a middle rope tornado DDT before taking him down by the arm. Eddie is tied in the middle rope for a kick to the head but he’s able to counter the Sliced bread. A Blue Thunder Bomb gives Eddie two but the running knee is countered into a cross armbreaker. That’s countered into a rollup to give Eddie the pin at 12:45.

Rating: C+. This was the wrestling style match on the card and they had two guys capable of making it work. Romero is hit and miss for me most of the time but he was on well enough here. At the same time, Edwards needed the win to boost him back up as he is heading in to face Ishii in Dallas. Pretty nice TV match here.

Post match Eddie offers a handshake but then goes after Romero again. Cue Jonathan Gresham for the save and Eddie is cleared out. Romero doesn’t seem thrilled but shakes Gresham’s hand.

Zicky Dice leaves Swinger’s Dungeon, which doesn’t seem to be the kind of dungeon Swinger thinks it is. Anyway, next week, it’s a Chump Chump Challenge.

Here’s what’s coming at the Multiverse of Matches and next week.

Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Tasha Steelz

Mickie is challenging in a street fight. They go straight for the slugout to start and go to the floor almost immediately. Mickie gets in a trashcan lid shot to the back to take over and drags Steelz up to the stage. Steelz is tied in a trashcan and rolled down the ramp but Savannah Evans comes in for a cheap shot to drop Mickie.

We take a break and come back with Steelz loading up a bunch of weapons and then throwing a trashcan at Mickie to keep her down. Mickie gets sent face first into a chair in the corner but manages to grab a chair of her own for stereo chair shots. Evans gets up on the apron again and gets powerbombed onto (not through) a table at ringside. That takes too long though and Steelz knocks Mickie onto the table too for the big crash.

Steelz doesn’t follow up though and gets hit with a trashcan to cut her off as well. James has to go after Evans again though and Steelz grabs a quick cutter for two. A flapjack onto an open chair drops Steelz, allowing James to go up top for the super Thesz press and another near fall. The MickieDT connects but Evans pulls the referee out at two. Evans gets in to beat on Mickie but here is Chelsea Green with a chair of her own. Green….sits down in the chair and tells them to beat on Mickie. That doesn’t take much convincing and Steelz hits a frog splash for the pin to retain at 16:03.

Rating: B-. This started good and then kind of fell off by the end. They stopped caring about the weapons and went towards the drama, especially with Green getting involved. That being said, you knew that the Green vs. James explosion was coming sooner or later and Steelz vs. James has been covered. I could have gone with more violence here as they were going at it early but it didn’t last in the end.

Post match Chelsea yells at Mickie, who goes after her to start the brawl. Green bails but here is Matt Cardona to hit Mickie with Radio Silence to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Other than the short Heath vs. Maclin match, I liked this one well enough and they have me wanting to see both of their big upcoming shows. That’s the sign of a good show and I’d like to see how much more they can set up Rebellion. Throw in some pretty fine wrestling and this worked out nicely for two hours. Or an hour and twenty fiveish minutes if you’re being accurate but close enough.

Results
Mike Bailey b. Laredo Kid and Willie Mack – Ultimate Weapon to Mack
Steve Maclin b. Heath – Rollup with feet on the ropes
Violent By Design b. Good Brothers – Climax to Gallows
Eddie Edwards b. Rocky Romero – Rollup
Tasha Steelz b Mickie James – Top rope splash

 

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXXIII
Date: April 2, 2017
Location: Camping World Stadium, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 75,245
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga, Tom Phillips

This hasn’t been quite a year yet but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long night. Like a few years before, I was in the stadium for this show but haven’t seen it since I reviewed it last year. This is a show that was well received at the time and it could be interesting to see how it holds up a year later. Let’s get to it.

The set is one of the most intricate they’ve ever done, with a big Wrestlemania globe (ala Universal Studios) and a roller coaster next to it (I think you get this). There’s also an inflatable ring atop the structure above the regular ring, which I somehow didn’t notice until about an hour and a half of being in the stadium). The theme was the Ultimate Thrill Ride and the visual certainly works. It’s really cool looking and worked very well. Unfortunately the stadium isn’t the best looking in the world and it made the whole thing feel a bit out of place. Oh and the CRAZY LONG RAMP, which is something like seventy yards long.

Kickoff Show: Cruiserweight Title: Austin Aries vs. Neville

Aries is challenging after Neville has dominated the division for months and needs someone fresh to challenge him. The fans are behind Aries, which isn’t that surprising though Neville was nothing short (ok he was always short) of awesome at this point. Aries takes him down with an armbar but Neville is right back out with a headscissors. Back up and Neville has to bail to the floor so Aries has a rest on the top rope. I know it’s a Shawn Michaels spot but Aries sells the heck out of it.

Neville comes back in and eats a basement dropkick, followed by the middle rope elbow to the back for two. The suicide dive is blocked with a kick to the head though as the back and forth continues. A missile dropkick gives Neville two and we take a break. Back with Neville holding a chinlock (They even do it on the Kickoff Shows!) but taking WAY too long to glare at the crowd before trying a middle rope Phoenix splash (makes sense given his King thing).

One heck of a backdrop puts Neville on the floor and Aries is right back after him with the suicide dive. You can hear the fans getting back into this and that’s a good result from these two. The main reason to put something like this on is to get the fans fired up for the real show and it’s a great place to put them in.

They come back in with Aries blocking the superplex and nailing his own missile dropkick (looked awesome too) for a near fall. A snap German suplex plants Aries though and Neville takes over again. Another suplex gets another two and Neville is starting to look annoyed. With the technical stuff not working, Neville just kicks him in the face in the corner.

Aries is fine enough to reverse the Rings of Saturn attempt into a rollup and now the Discus knocks Neville hard to the floor. Back in and Aries hits a top hurricanrana and the 450 (with a really annoying crowd reaction shot) gets two. The Last Chancery goes on but Neville rips at the eye (which was recently reconstructed) to break the hold. Aries is writhing in pain and it’s the Red Arrow to retain the title at 15:40.

Rating: B. I remember hearing that this would be on the Kickoff Show and being very relieved as I didn’t think the main show would allow it nearly the amount of time that it needed and deserved. I’m glad to see that I was right here as they had a heck of a chess match here with both guys getting in everything they could and showing how back and forth the whole thing was. Neville cheating to win in the end fit him well, as he finally had someone who could match him and had to take a shortcut. Really good stuff here as Neville continues his unbelievable roll.

If the pay per view started here, it would have been a perfect Kickoff Show. But nah, we need two more matches.

Kickoff Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Rob Gronkowski, a friend of Mojo Rawley, is in the front row. Big Show’s music plays everyone but Braun Strowman to the ring. Braun tosses Primo two seconds into the match as the ring needs some serious cleaning out. Kalisto and Simon Gotch are tossed as well and Strowman eliminates Slater. Jimmy Uso and Goldust follow them out as they’re not wasting time here.

There goes Konnor but it’s time for the Show vs. Strowman showdown. Everyone stops to watch but Sami jumps Braun due to reasons of general stupidity. That goes nowhere so it’s Strowman dumping Show. Everyone goes after Strowman but he gets rid of Viktor in the process. Strowman is eliminated, making him look like a loser/afterthought in the process (oh….just wait). Hawkins is out and Ziggler gets to do his usual false hope spot. We get into the required “everyone hits everyone but doesn’t really try to win” portion as things slow down.

Ziggler low bridges Truth out as I manage to remember that Truth is employed. There goes Rhyno and Ziggler is thrown over the top, only to hang on again. There goes English, followed by American Alpha dropkicking English out. Jey Uso and Jason Jordan are tossed, followed by Chad Gable as the ring is really thinning out. Tian Bing gets rid of Fandango and Breeze, followed by Henry eliminating Sin Cara (in some sweet Wrestlemania gear). Henry is out next as there’s nothing between these eliminations.

Ziggler superkicks Bing out and that’s about it for Tian’s career accomplishments to date. Sami’s Helluva Kick gets rid of Epico and we’re down to nine. It’s been too long since Ziggler was nearly eliminated so Harper chokes him on the apron this time around. Mojo dumps Bo and Mahal eliminates Crews, followed by Rawley tossing Ziggler. Harper is out next and we’re down to Mojo, Jinder, Titus, Dain and Zayn.

A running clothesline gets rid of Titus but Dain eliminates Sami, completely sucking the life out of the crowd. Why you ask? Well we’re left with Dain, Rawley and Mahal. How excited would you be? Jinder gets clotheslined down and we get a Dain vs. Mojo showdown. A Pounce drops Dain but Jinder pulls Mojo through the ropes and out to the floor. Jinder follows him out and sends Rawley into the barricade, right in front of Gronkowski.

That means a drink going into Gronkowski’s face and here he comes over the barricade. This gives us the funniest part of the show as a security guard runs over to stop him, only to have a ringside guy tap her on the arm as some referees come over and allow Gronkowski to get in. Gronkowski runs Mahal over (your future WWE Champion everyone) and Mojo’s running right hands get rid of Dain. Another running punch to Mahal gives Rawley the win at 14:09.

Rating: D-. And this just LAUNCHED Mojo to the moon right? I know the idea here was to get Gronkowski involved (possibly as a substitute for Shaquille O’Neal) but Sami Zayn was RIGHT THERE to get the big win but nah, let’s go with the nothing guy winning the match. This wasn’t the best result for the battle royal but at least they were trying with Rawley, who took the time to talk to an entire group of fans when I saw him walking through Axxess that same weekend. Hopefully he gets somewhere in the future. The rest of the match was terrible with everyone being thrown out in short order and a bad ending.

Kickoff Show: Intercontinental Title: Baron Corbin vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and I have no idea why this was on the Kickoff Show. Corbin crushed Ambrose underneath a forklift to set this up, giving us the hilarious visual of the referees trying to LIFT IT UP despite the key being in the ignition. They waste no time in fighting to the floor with Dean getting the better of it and heading back inside.

That earns him a hard whip to send Ambrose’s ribs into the post and give Corbin a nice big target. Or 24 of them in this case. A choke shove puts Dean down for two and Baron whips him into the barricade for good measure. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Dean avoids a charge to send Corbin shoulder first into the post. Corbin avoids the top rope elbow and blocks Dirty Deeds for good measure. That earns him a trip to the floor but Baron knocks him out of the air on a slingshot dive.

The top rope elbow puts Corbin down again though and Dean gets two off a swinging neckbreaker. These two aren’t exactly clicking so far. Deep Six gives Corbin two and works on the ribs a bit more. The Rebound Lariat runs Baron over again but he’s right back with a powerbomb to stay on the ribs. That’s about it for Corbin though as Dean jumps up and hits Dirty Deeds to retain at 10:44.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one but the bigger issue was with the ending, as Baron winning the title would have made the most sense. Making it even worse was the fact that Baron won a street fight non-title rematch two days later but none of that matters as the Superstar Shakeup changed everything a week later. The match was nothing to see either as they didn’t go into the brawl that would have suited them best.

And now on the main show, which is FIVE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES LONG. Sweet goodness and they wonder why it’s hard to make new fans.

Tinashe, who looks like a low rent Beyonce (still very attractive though with a great voice) sings America the Beautiful. This includes the Air Force flyover, which will nearly knock you off your feet.

The opening video is about how everyone wants to come here, either as a fan or as a wrestler. This is the biggest show of the year and it is the ultimate thrill ride. The video turns into a roller coaster, starting with some historic moments and going into clips of wrestlers on tonight’s show. It’s continuing the theme and that’s a good thing when so many of these shows only have a loose theme at best. Ignore the fans cheering for Miz and AJ Styles and booing the heck out of Roman Reigns of course.

Here are your hosts for the evening: the New Day, in Final Fantasy inspired gear, with Kofi riding in on their bicycle powered ice cream cart. I still have one major question: HOW DID THEY NOT HAVE ICE CREAM FOR SALE??? They teased that for weeks and NOTHING. I was looking forward to it but for some reason it just never happened. After some dancing and gyrating, Xavier says there were a lot of options to host the show. Fans: “WOO!” It was your boys the NEW DAY who got the call though and they get to tell us about all the action that we’ll be seeing tonight.

It’s time to officially pulls their levers (making Kofi and Xavier cringe) and Big E. starts sending the smiling glances over to Woods as he freaks out. This was just after the sex tape fiasco, which was hinted at but never mentioned on WWE TV. In other words, this was a nice little inside joke for the fans while not giving away anything that would be un-PG. Well done and the way this needed to be handled. New Day’s level of rock is confirmed and that’s it, wrapping up this year’s installment of an unnecessary addition to the Wrestlemania card.

We recap AJ Styles babysitting Shane McMahon. AJ lost the Smackdown World Title to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and Daniel Bryan/Shane put him in the Elimination Chamber instead of giving him a one on one rematch for the title. That’s not cool with AJ, so he beat up Shane to set up this year’s “Shane can totally wrestle if you give him one of the best performers in the world” match. They’ve attacked each other a few times each since with Shane’s punches somehow getting a little worse since last year.

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Shane’s kids are at ringside because what would Wrestlemania be without them? AJ isn’t interested in throwing punches so a quick standing switch sends Shane into the ropes. A headlock and snapmare have Shane down as AJ is toying with him to start. Shane gets in some armdrags and takes Styles down for a rollup, giving us some frustration to send AJ outside.

Back in and AJ punches him in the face as it turns into a boxing match. You know you don’t have to ask Shane to do that twice so we let the suck fly, followed by an elbow to AJ’s face. One heck of a baseball slide sends Shane over the announcers’ table as control goes hard to Styles. Back in and a knee drop rocks Shane again but of course he can shake off the Phenomenal Blitz.

The Phenomenal Forearm is broken up and Shane starts his dance that was stupid back in the 90s so today it’s awesome (like everything in the Attitude Era). An Angle Slam gets two on AJ but he’s right back with the Calf Crusher. Shane reverses into a rear naked choke, a cross armbreaker and something like the Rings of Saturn. He trains MMA you see. AJ shrugs them off and drops Shane again but the springboard 450 is countered into a triangle choke. That’s reversed into a one armed Styles Clash, and of course Shane is up at two.

They slug it out and the fans are entirely behind AJ, even more than you might have expected them to be. I know he’s going to be the favorite coming in but this star treatment of Shane is making it even worse. The ref gets bumped (well duh) and it’s trashcan time. AJ loads up his own Coast to Coast but Shane throws the can at him (with AJ having to pull up on the dive, making it look horrible). Phillips: “AJ has stepped into Shane’s world now!” You mean high flying wrestling?

Shane’s Coast to Coast gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. The big elbow misses but of course Shane is fine enough to counter the Phenomenal Forearm into a Maiavia Hurricane. That’s not enough from Shane though as he gets to try the shooting star, which only hits mat. The Phenomenal Forearm connects to finally put Shane away at 20:31.

Rating: B. Well that was Shane, with some Shane on the side and then more Shane to wrap it up. AJ looked awesome but that’s all he supposed to be. This was all about Shane getting to counter and hang with AJ, which doesn’t do Styles any good. A 40+ year old who doesn’t wrestle shouldn’t be hanging with a guy who was World Champion less than three months ago. But hey, Shane, right?

James Ellsworth is having issues working out so Ric Flair comes in to give him a Snickers. Then Ellsworth becomes Charlotte. Uh, yeah.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens. Their friendship had been having some issues of late so Jericho put together the Festival of Friendship, an over the top celebration of all things Owens and Jericho. At the end of it, Owens turns on Jericho and beat the heck out of him. Jericho came back and cost him the Universal Title at Fastlane so Owens is coming for Jericho’s Universal Title. The question became could Owens win without Jericho and now we get the chance to find out.

US Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kevin Owens

Owens is challenging. Jericho’s entrance brings back the countdown for a nice touch. Throw in the light up scarf and a big List of Jericho on the stage and this is advantage Chris. They slug it out to start with the Walls going on less than thirty seconds in. That sends Owens bailing to the floor and a top rope forearm to the head drops Owens back inside. Owens kicks him in the face and hammers away to take over.

We hit the chinlock, with some horribly obvious spot calling, followed by the backsplash for two. They head outside for the third time with Jericho backdropping his way out of the apron powerbomb. Jericho chops away and gets two off a super hurricanrana but gets clotheslined down. The frog splash misses, the Lionsault hits knees, and the Swanton hits knees as well to give us a slow down stretch.

Now the Lionsault connects for a delayed two but Owens gets in his own Walls of Jericho. A rope is grabbed so Owens tries the Cannonball, only to be reversed into the Walls. Kevin grabs the rope for the break and is right back with the Pop Up Powerbomb for two. Another Pop Up Powerbomb is countered into the Codebreaker but Owens touches the rope with one finger for the save. That’s a sweet heel touch. Owens rolls outside and superkicks the knee, setting up the apron powerbomb to give him the pin and the title at 16:46.

Rating: C+. Not bad but they never cranked up the violence that you would have expected after seeing the Festival of Friendship. These two should have been ready to destroy each other and instead it’s just a match with Owens working the ribs and looking for a powerbomb. They accomplished the goal of making Owens look like he can win on his own, but this isn’t the way they should have gone about it.

We recap the Raw Women’s Title match. Charlotte and Sasha Banks had raised the women’s division to entirely new levels and Charlotte needed a new challenger. Enter Bayley, who won the title on Raw in a big surprise, completely defeating the purpose of her character and leaving her with nothing to do. This problem would plague her for the next year and still does to this day. Nia Jax was added to the other three because you need to have as many people in Wrestlemania matches as possible.

Raw Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax vs. Bayley

Bayley is defending under elimination rules. The tube men are at ringside for a special change of pace. Sasha rides in on the back of a chauffeured car because that’s what Sasha does. Charlotte gets a crazy amount of pyro, making her look even more like a star than usual. Everyone goes after Nia to start but she wrecks them in increasingly short order. A Banzai Drop crushes Bayley and Nia throws Charlotte off the apron onto both Bayley and Sasha. There’s something about people being thrown around like weapons.

All three get together to go after Nia with Sasha wisely grabbing the leg to keep her in place. Charlotte boots Nia in the face for a double German suplex for two in a painful looking crash. Nia is back up and tries a second Banzai, only to get TripleBombed out of the corner for the elimination at 4:08.

As usual, Nia chokes in the big match because that’s just how she rolls. Charlotte pulls Bayley to the floor and it’s Sasha hitting a flip dive to take the champ down. As you might expect, it’s the corkscrew moonsault from the top to take Bayley and Sasha down again in a huge crash.

Back in and Natural Selection is countered into a failed Bank Statement attempt. Instead Charlotte gets two off a backbreaker and rips off a turnbuckle pad in frustration. Sasha’s top rope double knees are good for two of her own and the Bank Statement goes on. Sasha goes with a rollup and the kickout sends her face first into the buckle for the elimination at 8:10.

Bayley comes back in and gets her knee rammed into the exposed buckle. The moonsault, with the wind blowing Charlotte’s hair around, only hits mat to give Bayley a near fall. Charlotte is fine enough to go after the knee and grab the Figure Eight. Bayley gets to the rope so Charlotte takes her into the Tree of Woe, only to get backdropped from the top in a big crash. The big elbow is enough to retain the title at 12:04.

Rating: D. Why can’t they get these big matches right? This was completely backwards with Nia being thrown in there at the last minute and lasting all of four minutes. Then it’s Bayley not really overcoming the odds and just pinning Charlotte after shrugging off some of the offense. It’s not some come from behind win or a big moment, but really just a match where Charlotte happened to lose.

Video on the Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Hearing Jim Cornette’s voice in WWE is just wrong.

Diamond Dallas Page. Nice reaction and WELL deserved just for his stuff with Hall and Roberts alone.

Rock N Roll Express. WAY overdue.

Rick Rude. See the Rock N Roll Express.

Teddy Long. I defy you to not smile at this.

Eric LeGrand. Warrior Award and that’s fine.

Beth Phoenix. Fine enough if a female entrant is required.

Kurt Angle. Yep. Moving on.

Support the Boys and Girls Club! Fair request actually.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

No real story here as this is they’ve just been feuding and it’s time for a title match. Anderson and Gallows are defending and this is a ladder match because we have to have one. Enzo and Cass’ speech is short this time as they say they’re climbing every rung to win the titles. We’re ready to go….and here’s New Day. Yeah remember them?

Anyway they’re in wrestling gear here but first, an announcement. This is now a FATAL FOUR WAY with one more team to be added. That would be the HARDY BOYZ, making a shocking return and giving us a legitimate Wrestlemania moment. Before the music hit, I stood up and said “they wouldn’t”, which was aided as I couldn’t see that New Day was in ring gear. Amazing moment here and the twenty six million YouTube views suggest that it’s quite the popular idea. Cole says thinks are about to be BROKEN and Matt does the DELETE pose.

It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) and the Hardys waste no time with Poetry in Motion to Gallows. Enzo and Cass are taken down as well as the fans are entire enamored with the Hardys all over again. A Whisper in the Wind takes both Sheamus and Cesaro down and it’s time for the first ladder. Jeff goes up but it’s Gallows making a pretty easy save. Cesaro comes back in and climbs onto Gallows’ shoulders for a double stomp onto Anderson’s ribs. Well that worked.

This time it’s Enzo and Cass coming in, just to make sure that everyone gets their turn in you see. That goes nowhere so the Hardys bridge the ladders between the ring and the apron but Cesaro and Sheamus slam them together. With a little too much Sheamus on offense, Cass launches Enzo over the ladders like a cannonball to take him down.

Back in and Sheamus hits the ten forearms to Gallows while Cesaro Swings Anderson. Despite what Cole thinks, that’s not exactly working together. We hear about the Tag Team Titles not changing hands at Wrestlemania in SIXTEEN YEARS (that’s inexcusable) until Sheamus Brogue Kicks the heck out of Cass. Enzo shoves the ladder over to drop Gallows and Sheamus and goes up, sending Graves into hysterics over the horrible possibilities.

Sheamus and Gallows come back in for the save but don’t bother to knock him off the ladder. Instead it’s Anderson climbing the ladder and knocking Cesaro into the ladder. There’s a Magic Killer to Cesaro but Matt hits them both with a Twist of Fate, including a big one off of the ladder to Anderson. Jeff hits the required Swanton off the ladder to drive Cesaro through a bridged ladder, leaving Matt to pull the titles down at 11:05.

Rating: C+. There’s only so much you can get out of a ladder match like this with almost nothing to it other than the big Hardys return. That being said, they absolutely got the ending right as there was no other way to go here. Enzo and Cass weren’t going to work after something as special as the Hardys showing up so don’t even try. There wasn’t much to this in the way of high spots either, but this was ALL about Matt and Jeff, as it should have been.

Jimmy Fallon is here.

We recap the Miz/Maryse vs. John Cena/Nikki Bella, which is mostly about Nikki and Cena teaming together for the first time ever. The idea is that Cena won’t marry Nikki so Miz and Maryse are better, meaning we’re just waiting on Cena to pop the question here. In the show stealing moment of the year though, Miz and Maryse did some parody videos of Cena and Nikki and Total Divas/Bellas, giving us some of the funniest things WWE has ever done.

They nailed the ridiculous nature of the shows to perfection and made Miz look like the guy who should be ready to break through every ceiling above her. Oh and Maryse as Nikki Bella: sweet GOODNESS that worked on about a million levels. Finally though, a year later with Miz and Maryse now as parents, Cena’s jokes about Miz “firing blanks” are pretty much dead.

Jerry Lawler is on commentary.

Nikki Bella/John Cena vs. Maryse/The Miz

Al Roker is guest ring announcer for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than having a celebrity appearance. This is Maryse’s first match nearly six years and she doesn’t look like she’s lost a step. Cena and Nikki run down the ramp and we see a wide shot for a cool visual. Cena’s mom is in the front row and he seems shocked to see her, which would be a heck of a surprise.

The women start and there’s no contact for a minute so let’s bring in the guys instead. Miz poses on the ropes and then bails to the floor to start a chase. Back in and Miz finally stomps away as we finally make contact nearly two minutes in. Maryse gets in a poke to the eye so Miz can fire off a left hand. Cena and Nikki have had no offense so far. The fans are very pleased with Miz’s beating of Cena, mainly because they realize how awesome those Total Bellas parodies were.

Miz misses the running clothesline in the corner but Maryse breaks up the hot tag attempt by pulling Nikki off the apron. A DDT gives Miz two and he slowly does Daniel Bryan’s pose (How amazing is it that the match could ACTUALLY HAPPEN?). The YES Kicks keep Cena rocked but Miz makes the mistake of telling Nikki that she can’t see him.

A big slap puts Miz on the floor and a diving tag brings in Nikki. Some bad forearms to Maryse’s arms (Shane could do better than that) don’t do much damage so Nikki runs Miz over instead. Back in and Nikki’s big forearm sets up stereo Five Knuckle Shuffles. The AA and a Rack Attack 2.0 give us a double pin at 9:38.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? Miz beat Cena up for about eight minutes and then it was hot tag Nikki to put the villains away Hogan style. After all the work and amazing promos, this is Miz’s Wrestlemania reward. I’m so glad this is what they went with instead of Cena vs. Undertaker, which was likely possible at this show. But hey, Total Divas and Total Bellas got a plot out of it.

Post match Cena says this is what Nikki wanted when she was rehabbing her neck. He tells a downright creepy story about Nikki being groggy before going inf or surgery. Apparently Cena asked if Nikki knew he would marry her one day. She said yes, and today is that day. Cena proposes and we get the big moment as she says yes. I’m SO glad this is what Cena, in the final few years that he has in WWE, is spending one of them doing this. It’s a sweet moment, but my goodness do this on Total Bellas where the fans want to see it.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. HHH, in another dumb story. So Rollins was HHH’s big ace in the hole a few years back and everything was all evil and great. Then Rollins tore his ACL and had to vacate the World Title, which HHH took as not being good enough to be the top guy. Let me repeat that: HHH said that leg issues were signs that someone wasn’t good enough to be the man in WWE. HHH then cost the returning Rollins the title to turn him face but now it’s time for revenge with a fired up Rollins wanting to burn the place down to destroy HHH.

Seth Rollins vs. HHH

Anything goes and, as usual, HHH gets the coolest entrance of the night with a big motorcycle and a police escort, plus Stephanie as a CRAZY HOT biker chick. Seriously, I know she can be irritating but she can rock the heck out of some leather pants. He gets the biggest entrance every year and it takes up a bunch of the spotlight but I can live with it if she’s in outfits like that.

Rollins’ entrance involves holding up a torch and touching it to the ground, sending digital flames down the ramp. I get the burn it down thing but it’s rather lame, along with coming after the really cool entrance. Well done again HHH, as he continues to be smarter than most wrestlers today.

They waste no time in slugging it out with Rollins getting the better of it (therefore I must remind you: HHH once won a slugout with modern day Brock Lesnar) to knock HHH outside. A dragon screw legwhip takes Rollins down by the knee that wasn’t hurt in the first place. Rollins shrugs it off and punches him away, followed by an enziguri back inside. The suicide dive sends HHH into the barricade and it’s already time for the announcers’ table. As usual, Rollins tries a Pedigree onto the table but gets countered with a DDT which doesn’t break the table.

HHH cranks up the violence with a chair to the knee before bridging Rollins’ knee between the ring and the table so he can drive his own knee into Rollins’. Back in and the slow knee work continues, because that’s how HHH loves to work on a show this big. Rollins tries the sunset bomb but hurts his knee all over again. It’s fine enough to hit the Buckle Bomb and a hard whip sends HHH over the corner to the floor. With HHH staggered, Rollins goes up top (Graves: “He’s screwed if he hits this or not.”) and scores with a high crossbody to the floor.

Since it’s an anything goes match, Rollins loads up a pair of chairs and a table on the floor instead of just bashing HHH with the chair. A frog splash to the back keeps HHH down but he kicks the knee out to cut Rollins off again. HHH takes forever to get up top though and gets a chair pelted at his head, setting up the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. You know, on the bad knee.

Stephanie breaks up the Phoenix Splash by pulling the knee onto the ropes and we hit a reverse Figure Four. That’s reversed into a Gargano Escape of all things but HHH goes smart by punching him in the knee. The reverse Figure Four goes on outside so Rollins reaches underneath the ring to find weapons. Naturally this includes the sledgehammer but HHH lets the hold go.

Back in and Rollins’ knee is fine enough for a low superkick to the face, followed by an enziguri to really hammer the point home. Stephanie takes the hammer away from Rollins though and a Pedigree gives HHH two. The fans barely even reacted to that one and I can’t say I blame them.

HHH channels his inner CM Punk and loads up a super Pedigree but gets backdropped down (already done by Bayley earlier). Now the Phoenix Splash gets two but neither can hit a Pedigree. Instead HHH hits him in the knee but walks into a superkick, which knocks Stephanie off the apron and through a table. That wakes the fans WAY up just in time for the Pedigree to give Rollins the pin at 25:25.

Rating: B-. This is an interesting one I was bored out of my mind watching it live but it flies by watching it back. That being said, the constant knee work got very dull, especially when it wasn’t even Rollins’ bad knee. As usual, the Stephanie bump got by far the strongest reaction of the night because it’s something you don’t see very often. It’s not a bad match at all but you EASILY could have chopped off ten minutes and no one would have missed a thing.

Pitbull performs the theme song and eats up way too much time.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt for the Smackdown World Title. Orton joined the Wyatt Family after becoming tired of being beaten down by the team. Then he won the Royal Rumble and promised to never cash in the title shot on new champion Wyatt. It wound up being a ruse though and Orton used his newfound access to the Wyatt Family compound to destroy the whole place. Then Bray poured Sister Abigail’s ashes over himself and gained her powers as this story got REALLY stupid. There was also something about Luke Harper nearly becoming #1 contender that went nowhere but warrants a quick mention.

Smackdown World Title: Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging and has a viper go down the ramp, which he himself called stupid. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton takes him down with a Thesz press and some right hands. They head to the floor for more right hands but Bray goes caveman with a running headbutt back inside. And then the lights go out (which I thought was a blackout) until the mat is covered with a projection of maggots. We’re about two minutes into the match and this is already in the pantheon of dumbest ideas ever.

Bray runs him over again and this time it’s worms on the mat. The referee jumps out of the ring, possibly because he wants to go work for a sensible company like TNA. A Rock Bottom into a backsplash gives Bray two but Sister Abigail is countered into a rollup for two. I mean, it doesn’t matter as they’ve completely lost the fans after that stupid, STUPID idea but never let that stop WWE.

They head outside again with Bray diving off the apron and straight into a dropkick. Sister Abigail into the barricade drops Orton again but he’s back up with an RKO to knock Bray silly on the floor. That’s only good for two back inside and Sister Abigail is countered into the backbreaker. Orton’s hanging DDT looks to set up the RKO but this time Sister Abigail connects for two. But hang on because let’s hit those roaches to complete the trio of stupid! Orton is finally done with all this nonsense and hits the RKO for the pin and the title at 10:13.

Rating: F. You are the winter, fall and spring. You are the sun that summertime brings. You are the stars in the nighttime sky. You are my girl and I’m your guy. You got me all tied up in knots and I’m lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m just lovin’ you lots and lots. I’m lovin’ you lots and lots.

That doesn’t make sense? Neither does what we just saw. Moving on.

The pilots from the flyover are here. That’s kind of cool.

We recap the Universal Title match, which all started because of a video game. Goldberg came back at Survivor Series to face Brock Lesnar in a rematch of the nightmare that was Wrestlemania XX. In a shocker, Goldberg won in about a minute and a half. Then it was decided that Goldberg could win the title again. He went on to eliminate Brock from the Royal Rumble and then won the Universal Title in about thirty seconds at Fastlane. Lesnar needed to defeat Goldberg once and for all so we’re having the match for the title tonight. This is all narrated by Paul Heyman, who talks about fantasies coming to an end in a nice touch.

Here’s the thing: you could do this same story without the title. Have Lesnar put up his career to get one more shot at Goldberg (it’s not like there was any doubt on the winner here anyway) so let us have the original plan: Owens dropping the title to Jericho (who never won the World Title as a face) and then Lesnar winning it the next month. Nah. We need GOLDBERG winning the title in a nostalgia moment for whatever reason.

Universal Title: Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Goldberg is defending and gets the long walk to the ring which might as well be the long walk to the gallows. Lesnar wastes no time and hits three German suplexes in nineteen seconds. In a great visual, the camera is on Lesnar when Goldberg cuts him down with a spear. A second spear sends Lesnar bailing and the third spear takes Lesnar through the barricade. That’s the first MINUTE of this match as they’re certainly starting fast.

Back in and both finishers are escaped, setting up another spear to Lesnar. The Jackhammer gets two, making Lesnar the second person to ever kick out (the other being Hogan, who only did it because of a missed cue). That means another spear (Heyman: “HE’S IN POSITION AGAIN!”) but this time Lesnar leapfrogs him and Goldberg hits the buckles. More suplexes (make it ten total) set up the F5 to officially conquer Goldberg at 4:47.

Rating: B. This was PERFECT for what they had to work with. Goldberg wasn’t going to be out there for a long match (he didn’t in his prime either) and they went with the right path. This was as action packed of a nearly five minute match as all you could have done. That first spear looked awesome and Goldberg gets to go out on his big moment. I’m pleased, though not as much as Goldberg, who probably made a ton of money for less than ten minutes combined of wrestling time in his comeback.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Naomi vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Alexa is defending and this is the most thrown together match that I can remember in a good while. They’re also rushing through the entrances due to the time issues. You know, because NOW they care about time issues. Naomi is the hometown girl and MY GOODNESS the Glow entrance is a sight to behold in a stadium. There are no tags of course so it’s a big brawl to start.

Naomi gets sent to the floor for a double suplex from Natalya and Carmella. Back in and Becky kicks the two of them down but James Ellsworth (Remember that?) grabs Becky’s foot to take over. Bliss breaks up a cover and screams at Carmella to get out of her ring. The DDT gets two on Natalya but Becky breaks it up this time, only to have Ellsworth come in. No Chin Music is countered into a Bexploder and it’s Naomi coming back in this time.

Naomi slingshots in to sunset flip Natalya, who German suplexes Becky at the same time. Speaking of the same time, Natalya tries a double Sharpshooter on Carmella and Naomi but can’t get the legs up. Well, not surprising, but it’s so bad that the camera cuts to her back. Naomi comes back in for a Rear View to Bliss and a big dive to take everyone out. Back in and Naomi’s reverse Rings of Saturn makes Bliss tap for the title at 5:33.

Rating: D. The timing issues KILLED this and there’s no way around it. Much like the ladder match earlier, there’s nothing you can do when you have five minutes and six people in a match. Naomi winning the title back is cool, but I still have no idea why her winning it back in her hometown is supposed to be some huge deal. Yeah it’s cool, but it’s not like this is some great moment.

Wrestlemania XXXIV is in New Orleans. Those songs will drive you crazy by the end of the weekend.

New Day comes out to thank the fans for the record attendance of 75,245. The team is still funny but egads they could have been cut out of this whole thing and not been missed.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Undertaker. Reigns eliminated him from the Rumble and now we have a match to determine who is the real Big Dog.

Jim Ross is out to do commentary for the main event. That’s even more impressive when you consider his wife died days before this show.

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

No holds barred, first announced before the entrances. Reigns is booed out of the stadium, as has become a custom. In a smart move, Undertaker rises from the middle of the ramp (with a cool visual of smoke building up and clearing to reveal him standing there). I completely missed this as I was looking at the stage and then glanced down to the ring and saw him climbing the steps.

Undertaker slugs away in the corner to start and knocks Reigns to the floor. Back in and Reigns knocks him over the top as well, with Undertaker landing on his feet. Reigns hammers him down to take over and they head outside so this can be more of a brawl, which is the only way to go. The apron dropkick (to a standing Undertaker) puts Undertaker down again but he wins a slugout back inside. Reigns hits him in the face and Undertaker just looks mad.

Snake Eyes and the big boot set up the legdrop for two. The threat of a chokeslam sends Reigns outside again and this time the apron dropkick is punched out of the air. Another dropkick staggers Undertaker but it’s a chokeslam onto the announcers’ table. They climb onto the other tables and it’s a spear to drive Undertaker through (almost in a running spinebuster) for the double knockout.

Reigns is the only one back in….and Undertaker sits up. Back in and Reigns does the corner clotheslines into the corner right hands, meaning the Last Ride (an AWFUL one at that with little impact and more Undertaker dropping Reigns than slamming him down). It’s chair time but Undertaker takes it away and beats him down instead. A quick Superman Punch knocks Undertaker into the ropes but another is countered into a chokeslam onto the chair.

The Tombstone gets two and the fans, who are supposed to be smart at Wrestlemania, seem shocked at the kickout. Off the first Tombstone. In a Wrestlemania match. Who’s the smart one here? Another Tombstone is loaded up but this time Reigns backflips….and just can’t lift Undertaker for the counter. They try a few more times but just stop for the sake of embarrassment with Reigns trying a Superman Punch instead.

The spear connects but Undertaker is fine enough to put on Hell’s Gate. The rope is reached for a break (erg) and Reigns unloads with the chair. Another spear gets another two and another spear gets another two and another Superman Punch (Undertaker sits up and falls over) sets up another spear to give Undertaker his second Wrestlemania loss at 22:57. That last sequence took nearly five minutes.

Rating: D+. It’s not terrible, but Undertaker looked like an old man who should have hung it up a few years ago. The problem here was the crowd being completely dead and it showed really badly. There’s only so much energy you can have in an academic match at the end of a seven hour show. Reigns winning makes complete sense but it was a bad match (the botches and CRAZY amount of time spent standing around didn’t do it any favors) and there’s no way around that.

Reigns gets the big pyro display behind him as he stands on the ramp (great shot) but we’re not done yet. Undertaker slowly sits up and we go to a bunch of replays. Back to live and it’s Undertaker standing in the ring with the hat and coat on. I use that term loosely as it looks like Mark Callaway standing there dressed as Undertaker. For the first time, it seems like we’re seeing the real person instead of the character, which is a MAJOR change for him.

He looks around to the crowd, takes off his gloves, coat and hat and folds them up in the ring. With the fans applauding, he goes outside, kisses Michelle McCool, and walks up the ramp. Undertaker stops, looks back one more time, raises the fist, and lowers down through the ramp, fist still in the air, to end the show with the gong sounding one more time. There was no commentary for the last ten minutes, without even a goodbye (appropriate here).

That’s about as perfect of a sendoff as WWE has ever done. It was emotional, it felt special, and it came off like the real thing. Undertaker is the last vestige of that older generation and him breaking character for the first time ever and leaving is incredible to see. It’s why I don’t want to see him wrestle again and why it makes me sad to think that he will. Incredible stuff, and Thank You Taker.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s no way around it: this show is way way way way way way way WAY too long. I got through an hour of the show a few days back (you know I’m not watching this in one sitting) and looked down at the bar in near horror of how little space I had covered. Five hours, plus TWO HOURS of a Kickoff Show is just too much, especially when there’s stuff to be cut. What could be cut? Well off the top of my head:

AJ vs. Shane (move AJ to ANYTHING else and drop Shane) entirely or at least cut it down by about eight minutes

Corbin vs. Ambrose (I know it’s the Intercontinental Title but on a show this huge, it’s understandable)

Smackdown Women’s Title (it’s just nothing and felt like total filler)

Five to ten minutes each off of Reigns vs. Undertaker and HHH vs. Rollins (those combine for nearly fifty minutes total)

Pitbull

AT LEAST get this down to four and a half hours of main show. That can’t be too much to ask, right?

Other than the timing issues though, the show is mostly solid. There’s a ton of good stuff up until the mixed tag and then things start to fall apart. The Universal Title match was as perfect as it was going to be get but there’s just so much bad around it (Bray vs. Orton, Reigns vs. Undertaker, HHH vs. Rollins in that match that is still going on somewhere, with HHH still working the knee) that the good is dragged down.

At the end of the day, it all comes back to the timing issues as there’s almost no way to make a show this long work. It’s too much to sit through and it becomes a chore at the end. Just cut this down by a good hour (or two) and things are much better, but bigger is better for WWE and that’s not changing anytime soon. As it is, the show works more than it misses but it’s still not a classic by any means.

Ratings Comparison

Neville vs. Austin Aries

Original: A-

2018 Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

Original: C+

2018 Redo: C-

Shane McMahon vs. AJ Styles

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Charlotte vs. Nia Jax

Original: C-

2018 Redo: D

Hardy Boyz vs. Anderson and Gallows vs. Enzo Amore/Big Cass vs. Sheamus/Cesaro

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

John Cena/Nikki Bella vs. The Miz/Maryse

Original: D

2018 Redo: D-

HHH vs. Seth Rollins

Original: C+

2018 Redo: B-

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

Original: F

2018 Redo: F

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Original: B

2018 Redo: B

Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Becky Lynch vs. Carmella vs. Mickie James vs. Natalya

Original: D-

2018 Redo: D

Undertaker vs. Roman Reigns

Original: D+

2018 Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2018 Redo: C+

Yeah I overrated a lot of this the first time around. It’s good, but not that good.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/04/07/wrestlemania-xxxiii-a-long-wait-for-a-long-show-with-a-long-ramp/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Barretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Primo and J. are sent out in the first thirty seconds but the ring is still really full. Henry puts out the Dudebusters and Chavo, only to get dumped by Khali. As you might expect, a bunch of people get together to put Khali out as well. Cryme Tyme gets together to put out Gallows but Shad eliminates JTG. Things settle down for a change but there are still too many people in there.

Rating: D+. This would be the traditional not great battle royal but it was cool to see someone young getting a win for a change. You could see a lot of new names showing up around the company, though a lot of them really never went anywhere. Unfortunately that would include Tatsu, who never went much higher than this, partially due to ECW not being around to take away some of the roster spots.

We open with another fly over.

Fantasia (from American Idol) sings America the Beautiful.

Tag Team Titles: R-Truth/John Morrison vs. The Miz/Big Show

Video on Wrestlemania week in Phoenix.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Kofi Kingston vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne vs. Jack Swagger vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Matt Hardy vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Kane vs. Christian

Extreme Rules ad.

Sheamus vs. HHH

Two straight Irish Curse backbreakers put HHH down as the match slows a lot. An ax handle gets two and some simple right hands to the face get the same. We hit the chinlock because this is the point in a WWE style match where you would put on a chinlock. After a powerslam, Sheamus grabs an armbar. Dude come on. HHH fights up out of the devastating armbar (because nothing else had been done to his arm) and grabs a DDT.

The high knee and facebuster get two but Sheamus counters the Pedigree into the Brogue Kick for two (of course HHH gets to be one of if not the first person to kick out of it). After the spinebuster sends Sheamus to the apron, another Brogue Kick drops HHH. No cover though as HHH pops up and hits the Pedigree for the pin at 12:10.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk holds him down with a test of strength grip until Rey fights up and springboards to the top for a moonsault into a DDT (that looked way better than I was expecting). Another moonsault is caught in the GTS (Go To Sleep) but Rey grabs the rope to save himself. Rey kicks him down and tries a frog splash but Punk sits up just in time. Back up and Serena saves Punk from a 619, only to have it connect a few seconds later, setting up the springboard splash for the pin at 6:30.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon

Bret punches it out of his hand though and beats on him for a bit, followed by stomping away at the “lower abdomen”. Someone throws Bret a chair so he can have a seat for a bit. Bret beats on him with the chair for a good while and Vince appears to be in shock. The Sharpshooter finally makes Vince tap at 11:09.

Rating: A. This was all it needed to be and exactly what people were expecting. Neither guy is a wrestler anymore so having the Hart Family, especially Kidd and Hart-Smith, helped a good bit. There was never any doubt as to what this was going to be and while it went a bit longer than it needed to, it did everything it needed to.

Wrestlemania XXVII is in Atlanta. Cole promises a great guest host.

The attendance is 72,219, again not announced as a record.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Jericho vs. Edge

Maryse/Michelle McCool/Alicia Fox/Layla/Vickie Guerrero vs. Eve Torres/Beth Phoenix/Mickie James/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Rating: D. Well at least it was quick. The Divas were in a weird place here as they were trying to find a new top name but everyone was kind of getting lost in the shuffle. Laycool (Layla and Michelle) were trying but they needed some top stars. Kelly eventually became the main star, even though she was just a model who could only kind of work a match. Anyway, this was a nothing match that was only there for the Vickie stuff, which was another problem around this time.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista gets into his gloating power offense but Cena grabs a quick suplex to get a breather. An early AA attempt is countered into a DDT for two and now Batista gets his real advantage. We hit the chinlock with a body scissors (Striker: “Look at this potential submission hold!” Just stop. Please.) but Cena fights up and wins a slugout, only to get caught in a neckbreaker. Now we get the real Cena comeback with all his usual stuff, including the STF which sends Batista crawling to the ropes. A quick spear gets two for the champ and both guys are down.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ and no countout. Shawn just walks down but Undertaker makes his big entrance by rising up through the stage. Shawn breaks up the staredown with a throat slit of his own so Undertaker pounds on him in the corner early. Snake Eyes and the big boot set up Old School but Undertaker might have tweaked his knee. Shawn goes right after the knee to break up a chokeslam and starts in on the arm for some reason. Striker: “Shawn Michaels is very adept at submission grappling.” For the love of all things good and holy will someone SHUT HIM UP???

Ratings Comparison

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo:

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B

2013 Redo: C+

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F

2013 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A

2013 Redo: B+

Dang and I liked it even better on the first view. I might have been closer to right a few years back.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/04/03/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-26-john-cena-vs-batista-do-you-need-more/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/04/04/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxvi-goodbye-mr-wrestlemania/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Wrestlemania XXII
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s time for the biggest night of the year and this time around it has been rather fun. The Raw side has been a heck of a build while the Smackdown side has been hit and miss at best. This is one of the more forgotten Wrestlemanias (given that the image on the poster was of John Cena vs. Booker T., a match which hadn’t taken place in over a year at this point, you can kind of tell that they aren’t caring all that much) and it’s also the last one to date in a regular arena. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Eugene, Viscera, Goldust, Snitsky, Rob Conway, Tyson Tomko, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, Matt Striker, Super Crazy, Psicosis, Funaki, Steven Richards, Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, Animal, William Regal, Simon Dean

Half from Raw and half from Smackdown, so yes they are wearing the designated shirts. Dean tries to do his intro and gets kicked in the face for the immediate elimination. Richards gets rid of Conway and Funaki goes out as well. There goes Cade, followed by Goldust getting rid of Richards. Striker is out too and there go Crazy and Goldust as the ring is cleared out in a hurry. Snitsky gets rid of Regal and MNM dumps Eugene after a Snapshot.

We get the Raw vs. Smackdown showdown and Murdoch and Psicosis go out back to back. We’re down to Viscera, MNM, Snitsky, Tomko and Animal with Viscera and Animal being the targets for the other four. Viscera misses a charge in the corner but beats up MNM without much trouble. That means a double Visagra (Cole: “Melts in your mouth, not in your hand!” What in the world could that possibly mean in this context?) and Melina is nearly sick. It gets even worse as Viscera tosses MNM to get us down to four.

Snitsky kicks Tomko out by mistake and the LOD chants start back up. A big boot to Animal lets Viscera get rid of him, much to the crowd’s annoyance. Snitsky misses a running big boot though and Viscera wins without touching Snitsky at all. Cole: “I was hoping that would go on for another 15-20 minutes!” Tazz: “One of the best battle royals I’ve ever been a part of!” They’re bringing the Wrestlemania level snark this year.

Rating: D. Yeah this was horrible but the whole point was to get the undercard on the roster. I’m not sure on the logic of having the Chicago guy get all the way to the final three and then have him lose for the sake of Viscera, but I guess they don’t want a heel winning to open the show. Not that it would have mattered as it would have been one of the pops of the night, but it’s not worth getting annoyed about in the first place as it was a six minute battle royal before the feature presentation begins.

Post match Viscera kisses Lilian, who doesn’t seem thrilled.

Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child sings America the Beautiful. You know they’re getting in those American visuals every year and this is no exception.

The opening video looks at some great Wrestlemania moments over I Dare You by Shinedown. I like the song so this is a pretty good combination. They switch over to another song and the matches for this year’s show. That’s a nice mix that they tend to do well most years.

The posters of wrestlers around the top of the arena are a nice touch.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Carlito/Chris Masters vs. Big Show/Kane

Show/Kane are defending and we get the always awesome visual of the city set being on fire during Kane’s entrance. Masters shoulders Kane down to start as JR says this is the first tradition two on two tag match for these titles since Wrestlemania XV. How do you go that long without doing the normal version? Kane is back up with a leapfrog into a dropkick and it’s off to Show for the loud chops in the corner. A poke to the eye allows the tag off to Carlito, who gets a HECK of a reception (one of the loudest reactions I’ve ever seen for him), though Show throws both he and Masters around with ease.

Carlito gets gorilla pressed over the top onto Masters (seemingly elbowing him in the face on the way down) and Kane hits the top rope clothesline onto both of them. Back in and a double flapjack actually gets two on Show, with the replay showing a ram into an exposed buckle had something to do with it. Kane gets the tag so Show has to break up the Masterlock. Everything breaks down and Masters saves Carlito from the chokeslam. Masters hits Carlito by mistake when trying to save him again, meaning Kane can boot Masters to the floor. Not the chokeslam can hit Carlito to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. It was basically a more energetic Raw match and that works well enough for a Wrestlemania opener. I tend to like something like this more than some white hot match to open the show as it means you can go up from here. Carlito and Masters hadn’t been treated as threats to the title coming into the show so it makes sense for them to be little more than an annoyance here.

Post match, Carlito and Masters argue, with the fans being entirely behind Carlito. No violence ensues though.

Shawn Michaels, with a bandage on his head, says he doesn’t regret saying that Vince McMahon needed to grow up. Last year he and Kurt Angle tore the house down and the year before that, he did the same thing with Chris Benoit and HHH. Tonight, Shawn is going to be a different version of himself. Tonight, Vince McMahon needs to bow down and pray because Shawn is taking him to his own personal h***.

Matt Hardy vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Money in the Bank, allowing Cole to get in his first (to be fair in this case, minor) slip up of the night by saying Edge cashed in after John Cena’s Armageddon match. It’s a big brawl to start and the fans are behind Van Dam early on. Hardy goes for the first ladder but Van Dam takes him down with a slingshot dive onto the ladder onto Hardy for the crash. A ladder is bridged against the ropes so Shelton gets a running start for a huge flip dive to take down all of the young people.

Flair and Finlay fight in the ring (go on) but Matt comes in for the save with a superplex to bring Flair off the ladder (egads man). So Flair screams a lot and gets the X treatment (thanks to his knee), meaning we’re going to be down a person after about two and a half minutes. Lashley goes up top but Shelton grabs a sunset bomb. He can’t get Lashley down though so Finlay and Hardy go into the hurt business to bring Lashley crashing to the mat. Hardy crushes Finlay with the ladder in the corner until Finlay throws it back at him.

Finlay loads up the ladder but here’s Flair (after about three minutes away) to cut him off. Chops abound and Flair goes up again until Finlay makes the save with the Shillelagh, making Flair take another bump he shouldn’t be taking. The briefcase is swinging back and forth so Finlay can’t pull it down, allowing Shelton to go up as well. Lashley breaks that up and hits the Dominator on Benjamin, so Van Dam has to dropkick a chair into Lashley for the save.

Matt’s screaming legdrop from the ladder hits Lashley but he has to Side Effect Finlay off the ladder. Finlay gets knocked down as well though and Rob hits a splash off the very top of the ladder for the big crash. Van Dam goes up so Shelton does the always insane springboard onto the top of the ladder (because he can just do that) and hammers away. Matt brings in another ladder and climbs up to slug away at Shelton, who steps over to the other ladder. Rob shoves them both over for the big crash to the floor (always looks great) though and pulls down the briefcase to win.

Rating: B. This was good but not quite up to the standard that the big ladder matches have. It wasn’t all that long either and they didn’t have time to build much up. Shelton got in the big, impressive spots but there were enough high level bumps to go around. Van Dam and Flair were the only realistic winners here too so they picked one of the best options. Not as good as the others, but it still did what it was supposed to do.

New Hall of Famer Gene Okerlund is interrupted by Randy Orton, who doesn’t think much of someone who held a microphone for thirty five years. He promises to win the Smackdown World Title tonight but here’s Batista to say whoever leaves as champion is just holding it for him. Next year, he’s going to be champion at Wrestlemania XXIII.

It’s time for the Hall of Fame class, minus Bret Hart, who was not comfortable with appearing.

Gene Okerlund (No one did it better.)

Sensational Sherri (How was she not in already?)

Tony Atlas (He always seems happy to be around.)

Verne Gagne (Doesn’t mean anything directly to WWE, but you don’t have a wrestling Hall of Fame without him.)

William Perry (Sure, but he couldn’t get a suit? Or a tie? Or a shirt that tucked in?)

The Blackjacks (Again, how were they not in already?)

Eddie Guerrero (Yep.)

Vickie Guerrero looks rather overcome by the reception in a touching moment.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL, with Jillian Hall, is challenging and the ramp raises up so the limo can drive in. After commentary can manage to stop talking about Jillian’s cowgirl look, they bring up JBL wanting to prove that he can beat another great technical wrestler after Eddie Guerrero. They go straight to the slugout to start until Benoit drop toeholds him to try the Crossface. JBL is able to block it so Benoit headbutts him in the back of the head, which is a rather intense next step.

Some forearms to the neck keep JBL in trouble and a chop takes him down again. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter though and JBL bails to the floor to hide behind Jillian. Back in and JBL hammers him down in the corner until he misses a charge, allowing Benoit to roll the German suplexes. JBL crotches him on top though and hits the Eddie dance for some good mocking. The superplex brings Benoit down in a crash, allowing JBL to dance some more. He even hits two Amigos before having to boot Benoit in the face to cut off the comeback.

We hit the chinlock but Benoit fights up with more suplexes. The Swan Dive gets a close two but JBL blocks another Crossface attempt. He also blocks a German suplex with a grab of the rope and the referee, allowing him to….actually not cheat. Instead the Clothesline From JBL is countered into the Crossface, which is countered into a cradle (with a grab of the rope) to give JBL the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This has always been a bit of a weird one for me as JBL wasn’t exactly a hot challenger coming in but he did pick up the title, which reheated him in a hurry. He wasn’t going to make it back to the World Title anytime soon (or ever, as he didn’t need it), but he needed to win something instead of losing over and over again. This was good enough though and it’s hardly a stretch to see JBL win a match over Benoit.

We recap Edge vs. Mick Foley. Edge accused Foley of costing him the Raw World Title and wanted to beat him down, so Foley agreed to a fight. Foley wanted that one Wrestlemania moment and Edge is starting to realize that he might be in over his head.

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Hardcore match, Joey Styles joins commentary, Lita is here with Edge and Foley’s flannel shirt is buttoned up for a change. Edge has a bat to start but the early swings miss and Edge drops it to the floor. Foley slugs away in the corner and puts Edge in the Tree of Woe for the running elbow to the face. Lita throws in a metal sign though and it goes upside Foley’s head over and over. The spear hits early….and Edge is in a lot of pain, as Foley opens up the shirt to reveal a band of barbed wire wrapped around his stomach.

Foley cuts himself free and ties Edge in the ropes, meaning it’s time to grab the barbed wire bat. Lita tries for the save so it’s the Cactus Clothesline to Edge, sending all three outside in the process. Foley is certainly bringing it early on. A neckbreaker on the floor drops Edge and Foley pounds him down but his charge is hiptossed into the steps for a REALLY painful looking crash. There go Foley’s knees into the steps and it’s time for a chair. Edge loads up a table on the floor but Foley rolls off before Edge can come off the top.

Instead Edge slams him head first into the steel ramp (for a SICK thud)….and it’s time for the lighter fluid. Edge covers Foley in the fluid but gets piledriven for two. Foley grabs the chair but a Lita distraction lets Edge hit a DDT. Foley is busted and the barbed wire bat to the head makes it even worse. It’s time for the thumbtacks but Foley slams Edge (with no shirt) down onto them for the really big reaction.

A barbed wire Mandible Claw goes on and now it’s Edge being hit with the barbed wire bat over and over. Now it’s time for Foley to spray the table with lighter fluid but Lita hits Foley in the knee with the barbed wire bat. The table is set on fire and Edge hits the spear through the ropes and through the fire for the pin.

Rating: A. What is there to say about this? They massacred each other and Foley bled all over the place before taking a huge bump to end the match. This was a different side of Edge and it’s the side that needed to be shown to make him feel like more than a flash in the pan. This felt like two people wanting to hurt each other and then getting to do so, as Foley continues to know how to make someone into a much bigger star than almost anyone else.

Edge and Lita looking like they’re in physical shock after the match makes it a lot better.

Some fans won tickets to the show from Snickers.

Booker T./Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

Booker makes Sharmell start, jumps Boogeyman from behind, and then comes in to hammer on Boogeyman. The comeback doesn’t take long and Booker is sent into the post. Boogeyman eats some worms and stares at Sharmell for trying a staff shot to the back. Sharmell gets kissed with the worms and runs off, leaving Boogeyman to chokebomb Booker for the pin.

Rating: F. Of course this is a failure as there isn’t anything to be praised here. It was the three of them doing a short, bad match and the big deal was Sharmell getting a mouth full of worms. There isn’t much else to it than that and the fact that this aired at Wrestlemania at any point after about 1991 tells you why it’s a failure.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James for the Women’s Title. Mickie is a psycho who was obsessed with Trish (they never said the word lesbian but that’s what they were going for) but Trish wasn’t interested. Once Mickie was flat out turned down, she completely snapped and decided to take the Women’s Title instead. This feels like a big fight and that’s a good thing around here.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending. They fight over a lockup to start as JR tries to diagnose Mickie’s mental state. The Thesz press (JR: “Maybe the Louise Thesz press.”) puts Mickie down but she comes back with a kick, only to be thrown into the splits. A baseball slide puts Mickie on the floor but Trish kicks the post by mistake. Mickie wraps the leg around the post in a smart move and there’s a dropkick to the knee to make it worse.

The fans get behind Mickie and she wraps the leg around the ropes. The half crab goes on before it’s time to stomp on the leg in the corner. Mickie stops to soak in the cheers and bends the leg some more. This time Trish reverses into the spinning anklescissors but the fans aren’t happy with the comeback. The Stratusphere is countered with another slam of the leg to the mat as Lawler notices that Mickie’s skirt isn’t the most functional in a match.

Trish comes back with a Stratusfaction attempt but Mickie grabs her between the legs (on the Network) and licks her own hand (not on the Network) as JR loses it. Mickie tries the Stratusfaction but she either leaves it short or Trish can’t hold her on the knee, meaning they botch it horribly (also not on the Network). Mickie settles for the Chick Kick for the pin and the title. JR: “THE NUT JOB HAS WON THE TITLE!”

Rating: B-. This was getting really good near the end but then the botch happened and it stopped everything cold. The leg stuff was good and while it would have made more sense to have Trish’s knee give out when she was trying the Stratusfaction, it worked for a story in the match as Mickie knew how to break the thing down. More importantly though, Mickie FINALLY ends Trish’s year long plus reign and becomes the new star, which is long overdue. They needed to have the title change here as Trish had run out of gas a long time ago but it wasn’t like she had anyone good enough to drop it to.

Vince McMahons has the rest of the family drop to their knees in prayer before his match with Shawn. Vince: “God, let’s face it. I don’t like you, and you don’t like me.” Vince praises his own physique and promises to end Shawn.

Mark Henry vs. Undertaker

Casket match and the druids take their time wheeling the casket to ringside. Undertaker does the full entrance and Henry manages to keep glaring at him before jumping him to start things off. Some running clotheslines don’t do much to Henry so he runs Undertaker over with a single shot. They head outside with both guys going head first into the steps. The fans are in am ore traditional role here with the Undertaker cheers, which are cut off when Henry blocks Old School.

A low blow saves Undertaker from going into the casket and now it’s time to go after the arm. Old School connects this time but he still can’t get Henry down. Henry runs him over again but misses the running crotch attack and gets dropped into the casket. Undertaker follows him in and the lid closes before opening up with Undertaker’s hand around Henry’ throat.

They get back inside with Henry hitting the World’s Strongest Slam and covering because he isn’t that bright. Speaking of not that bright, Henry hammers away in the corner but gets planted with the Last Ride. Undertaker throws him onto and over the casket, setting up the Taker Dive (which barely clears the casket). Back in and a pretty impressive Tombstone lets Undertaker put him in the casket for the win.

Rating: D. Another one which didn’t work so well, mainly because there was no drama. Who was believing that Mark Henry was going to be the one to break the Streak? The Taker Dive and Tombstone both looked great but there isn’t much of a way around the fact that it was Mark Henry trying to break the Streak. It had no drama and wasn’t even that long, leaving this near the bottom end of the Streak (at least once it became a big deal).

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon. Shawn told Vince that it was time to get over the Montreal Screwjob and grow up so Vince decided to destroy Shawn once and for all. He has done a great job of making Shawn miserable and now it is time for Shawn to FINALLY get his hands on Vince in a no holds barred match.

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

No Holds Barred and there is a big framed copy of Vince’s Muscle and Fitness Magazine at ringside. Shawn jumps him to start and sends him into JR as the WE WANT BRET chants begin. The framed magazine goes around Vince’s head and Shawn is all ticked off. Cue the Spirit Squad to beat Shawn down though and hit the five man toss into the air. JR: “Someone get the hook!” Shawn gets their megaphone (which is smoking/powdery for some reason) and beats them down though, which sends them off for some reason.

Vince, now bleeding above the eye, gets in a clothesline to take over and it’s time to choke in the corner. The leather belt rips Shawn’s back up and it’s time to choke. Vince actually tunes up the band but Shawn blocks the kick (which had height but was nowhere near the right form) and hammers away. JR: “How are your stock dividends now???” The top rope elbow connects but here’s Shane with a kendo stick to take Shawn down. Always one to rub it in, Vince drops his pants but Shawn puts Shane’s face into it instead, followed by a low blow to Vince.

A clothesline puts Shane on the floor but that’s not enough, as Shawn handcuffs Shane to the rope. The Shane dance sets up a bunch of kendo stick shots to Shane and there’s a heck of a chair shot to Vince’s head. Lawler: “CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!” Vince is busted open and Shawn tunes up the band….before stopping cold. Instead he goes outside and grabs a ladder, which goes straight into Vince’s forehead.

Shawn still won’t cover as he grabs some trashcans and a table instead, even shoving Shane away to get to them. The trashcan to the head drops Vince again and Shawn goes up the ladder. Then he climbs back down and pulls out the BIG ladder. Shawn climbs again, does the suck it sign, and elbows Vince through the table for the huge crash. Medics bring a stretcher out but Shawn scares them off, stands Vince up, yells a lot, and finishes with the superkick.

Rating: C+. Of course it’s junk as an actual match, but this was exactly what they set it up to be. There is no reason to believe that Vince can hang with Shawn in a regular match so he didn’t really come close. Vince brought in a bunch of people, Shawn beat them up and then the beating began. Shawn destroyed him completely (or at least until the next night on Raw, or maybe a week later if they’re feeling generous) and it made sense. Might have gone a little long, but it was the logical way to go.

Post match Vince is taken out on a stretcher and still flips Shawn off. Cole talks about how Shawn promised to never go back to his old self but did it here. Not exactly, as it was just Shawn being violent and aggressive, which isn’t quite what they were talking about on the way here.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle for the Smackdown World Title. Rey won the Royal Rumble to earn the title shot but Orton talked enough trash to get him to put the shot on the line at No Way Out. Orton cheated to win, but Teddy Long put Rey in the match too, making it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending and POD plays Rey, in an Aztec warrior costume this year, to the ring. Orton jumps Angle with the belt before the bell to start but Angle is right back in with a German suplex to Orton, plus a double German to both of them at once (with Rey flying through the air). An overhead belly to belly takes Orton over as well but Rey sends Angle face first into Orton’s crotch.

Angle is fine enough to send Rey up for a super hurricanrana to Orton before throwing Rey outside. Rey breaks up the ankle lock attempt and kicks Angle in the head for two as the fans are split between Rey and Kurt. The 619 is countered into the ankle lock and Rey taps (less than four minutes in) but the referee is with Orton. The German suplexes take down both challengers and an Angle Slam to the floor drops Rey in a heap. That means an ankle lock to Orton but this time Rey grabs the referee so he can’t see a tap.

Rey Drops the Dime on Angle but gets knocked outside again. The RKO connects for a delayed two on Angle and Randy goes up top, earning himself the running belly to belly superplex. Rey is back in with the springboard seated senton for two more on Angle and Orton is back in to kick Angle to the floor. The powerbomb neckbreaker gets two on Rey but the RKO takes too long, allowing Angle to come back in with the Angle Slam on Orton. Rey slips out of the Angle Slam and armdrags Angle to the floor. That leaves Orton to be dropkicked into the ropes for the 619 into the West Coast Pop for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This is still one of the more perplexing big matches in Wrestlemania history as it had no real structure other than them doing moves to each other. Nothing was built up, nothing set up the finish and Rey just pinned Orton to win. It was fine as it was, but I was expecting a lot more, including more time as it didn’t even last ten minutes.

Post match the Guerreros come out to celebrate with Rey.

JR and the King talk about HHH and John Cena being ready for tonight. They needed two minutes for this instead of the other World Title match? Ah right: they needed to put a bed and pillows in the ring. Great way to use the Wrestlemania time.

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

It’s the annual Playboy match pillow fight so JR talks about Frank Gotch gate records in Chicago during the entrances. They to to the bed to start and then hit the catfighting. Torrie turns the bed over on her and then puts her dog on Candice’s face. Candice loses her dress and then puts on a headscissors over the ropes while bending backwards over the ropes. A middle rope elbow hits Torrie on the bed and it’s time to cut Torrie out of her dress. Candice pulls out her Playboy but gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D-. Yeah this happened and that’s about all there is to say about it. They were there to promote Playboy and it worked well enough, even though the Playboy Diva is usually a face and someone who wins but not quite this time around. It wasn’t exactly a match of course, but why would you expect anything else?

We see clips of the Wrestlemania press conference, with HHH saying the match against John Cena will be easy and Cena saying not so fast. HHH won a tournament to get the shot so there isn’t much of a story.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and HHH, sitting on a throne in a Thor/Conan motif (the announcers say Conan but he had a big hammer), rises out from the stage. Cena on the other hand comes out after a gangster video and following an old car, complete with CM Punk as a machine gun toting gangster in one of the more well known Before They Were Famous cameos. Still as close as he ever got to the Wrestlemania main event. We get an old school weapons check as JR puts over the idea of the grunt vs. the seasons, trained professional to give us a good story to the match.

They fight over the arm control to start and Cena is sent into the corner for some frustration. The fans are almost entirely behind HHH here, or at least the loud ones are. The FU doesn’t work and they stare each other down again. Cena is sent outside for a big cheer but he comes back in to slug away. A backdrop gives Cena two and the fisherman’s suplex gets the same.

We’re already into the chinlock as the fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. There’s the big whip over the corner to send HHH to the floor and another backdrop puts him on the ramp. Back in and HHH hits the jumping knee for a positive reaction as commentary keeps talking about the crowd reactions. HHH whips him hard into the steps and the fans even pop for him breaking the count.

Back in again and the facebuster into a running clothesline gets two on Cena, with JR calling it a slobberknocker. A pair of neckbreakers gets two more and we hit the neck crank. HHH switches to a sleeper and then a chinlock as JR gets the World Title wrong and has to apologize to Rey Mysterio. Cena fights up and hits his own clothesline before winning the slugout. There’s a powerslam and Cena initiates the finishing sequence but the Shuffle is countered with a spinebuster for two more. Another sleeper is countered into a belly to back suplex and it’s the Shuffle into the STFU.

HHH finally makes the rope and escapes the FU before sending Cena into the referee in the corner. That means a low blow to both of them, meaning HHH can give us the crotch chop. It’s sledgehammer time and Cena is knocked silly for a delayed two. The FU gets the same and the fans are popping hard on these near falls. Cena misses a high crossbody so HHH tries the Pedigree but Cena pulls him into the STFU, even trapping the arm so HHH can’t make the rope. It takes some time but HHH finally taps and Cena retains.

Rating: A-. That’s the ultimate achievement on Raw and the win that Cena really needed to become THE guy. He had been champion for almost a year straight but still felt somewhat like someone who hadn’t made it all the way to the top yet. Cena had been the guy, but he wasn’t THE guy until this one and that’s a big change.

The match itself was great as you would expect from these two on the big stage. They played up the idea that Cena was in over his head but ground out another win as he tends to do. Cena was getting better at the big matches around this point and of course that would become one of his calling cards down the line. This worked well and felt like a Wrestlemania main event as the company is now Cena’s, which is what matters most.

The celebration and five minute highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. Just like it did in the buildup, Raw annihilated Smackdown here with the two matches that made the show and a lot of other good stuff in between (plus winning Money in the Bank). Edge vs. Foley and the main event certainly deliver, but the rest of the show isn’t anything great. There are some really bad parts on here but the rest is good enough. That may sound good, but I’d like a little more than “good enough” for Wrestlemania.

The biggest problem here is that there really aren’t many blow away moments. Cena winning was more of a long term deal, Rey winning the title felt more like Eddie’s big farewell, Money in the Bank is all about the future and Trish finally losing is hardly top tier stuff. Shawn getting the win against Vince was nice to see, but that middle finger after the match doesn’t make it seem like a blowoff. The problem here is Smackdown, as there wasn’t much of note other than Rey’s title win. It was a one sided show between the two brands and when the show is built around both, it doesn’t work so well, Good, but forgettable.

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 10, 2022
Location: Paristown Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re done with Sacrifice and on our way to the Multiverse of Matches over Wrestlemania weekend. I don’t think that show is going to have that much major long term impact, but it does sound fun so far. Other than that, the big story is Josh Alexander is back and coming for the World Title. Throw in the three title changes and Sacrifice was a big night. Let’s get to it.

Here is Sacrifice if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Here is Josh Alexander for the opening chat. The fans chant about him being the NEXT WORLD CHAMP and that is all he has been wanting since Bound For Glory. He enjoyed sitting at home with his family but he had to come to some realities about his career. His son had been asking him when he would be getting his hands on Moose again. Well now he can say it’s April 23 at Rebellion because he is getting the title and his revenge.

Cue Honor No More to interrupt, with Eddie Edwards saying it must be nice to be able to leave and come back to work whenever you like. Before Josh worries about giving his son a new memory, he should tell him the truth: he has been handed everything since day one. Alexander threatens to knock his head off if he mentions his son’s name again. Alexander brings up everything he put on the line to bring the title back to Impact, but Eddie says the fans will turn on Alexander just as fast as they did him.

Matt Taven tells Alexander not to talk to Eddie like that and talks about how he and Eddie are both former World Champions. Taven: “And our reigns never finished prematurely in front of our wives.” Alexander: “When you were champion, you put the company out of business.” Alexander is willing to fight all of them and tries his best but Team Impact runs in for the save. Scott D’Amore comes out to say he is sure this is going to go smoothly one of these days, but it won’t be tonight. Tonight it’s Eddie vs. Rich Swann but for right now, it’s Willie Mack vs. Kenny King. Also, all night long, everyone is banned from ringside.

Willie Mack vs. Kenny King

King knocks him into the corner to start but gets shouldered out to the floor. The slingshot dive drops King again and they head back inside, where King grabs the referee. That lets him send Mack face first into the middle buckle to take over and a slingshot legdrop gets two. A seated abdominal stretch and camel clutch stay on Mack’s ribs and back but he gets in an “accidental” low blow. The Samoan drop into a standing moonsault gets two on King but he snaps off a powerslam for two. King misses a Blockbuster though and Mack hits the Stunner. The Six Star Frog Splash gives Mack the pin at 8:32.

Rating: C+. This was a good, mostly action based match and it was nice to see Mack getting a singles win for a change. I’ve always thought he could wind up being something around here but he seems more destined to be a tag guy. King was his usual self here and when that works, it can be rather entertaining.

We look at the Bullet Club’s night at Sacrifice.

Moose complains to Scott D’Amore about Josh Alexander sneaking into the World Title match at Rebellion. D’Amore asks if Moose is surprised that Alexander was sent home….which is a mile from Anthem’s corporate office. Moose has a week to sign the contract or he’s stripped.

Ace Austin vs. Crazzy Steve vs. John Skyler

The winner is added to the X-Division Title triple threat match at Rebellion so champion Trey Miguel is on commentary. Steve gets double teamed to start but he knocks Austin down and snaps Skyler’s neck around. Austin bails to the floor for a chat with Madman Fulton so Steve joins them, only to get enziguried.

We take a break and come back with Austin hitting running forearms to both of them in the corner until he gets sent outside. That leaves Skyler to hit a butterfly powerbomb for two but Austin is back in to kick both of them in the head. Austin gets caught on the top so Steve can bite Skyler, who holds him up in the air. That’s enough for Austin to come off with the Fold (turning it into a kind of Hart Attack Blockbuster) for the pin on Steve at 10:11.

Rating: C+. It’s the formula that has worked well forever and it still works today. While the X-Division isn’t quite a cruiserweight division, it goes by the same rules, including a few names being at the very top. That was the case here, as there was little reason to believe anyone but Austin was winning. That’s a good thing too, and the title match is already looking good.

Bhupinder Gujjar is ready to move forward but Rohan Raja comes in to ask why he hasn’t answered his phone calls. Larry D, who doesn’t work here anymore, comes in to get in Gujjar’s face. A big shot to the face has Raja saying that is why he and Gujjar have to be on the same page. Gujjar doesn’t seem convinced.

Violent By Design brags about winning the Tag Team Titles, saying it was all by design.

IInfluence/Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans vs. Mickie James/Chelsea Green/IInspiration

Green has a brace on her wrist but won’t need surgery this time. Lee and Dashwood start things off with lee taking her down and hammering away early. It’s quickly off to Rayne, who takes McKay into the corner to take over. A forearm knocks Rayne away though and it’s Evans coming in instead. That works for the IInspiration, who double kick her down to take over.

This lasts all of five seconds as the IInfluence trip up Lee on the floor so Evans can run her over instead. Evans’ legdrop connects and it’s Rayne coming in for a chinlock. Lee manages to send the IInfluence into each other though and the hot tag brings in Mickie to clean house. Steelz cuts that off though and Kaleb With A K pulls Green off the apron to break up the tag. That’s fine with James, who hits the MickDT to finish Steelz at 5:59.

Rating: C. I’m not wild on having Steelz lose in her first match as champion, especially to Mickie. This is a match where Evans should have taken the pin to keep the new champions strong, as we are probably heading for a rematch at Rebellion. Either that or Green is getting the shot, though that is going to depend on her wrist, as she never actually got into the match here.

Jonah brags about taking out PCO at Sacrifice, where he showed that PCO is human.

Here is the Bullet Club for a chat. Karl Anderson introduces everyone and we stop for a TOO SWEET/WOOP WOOP chant. Doc Gallows isn’t happy with losing the Tag Team Champions but everyone is on notice. They have won titles on every continent but Antarctica because they don’t have wrestling there so they’re coming to get the Tag Team Titles back.

Jay White talks about beating Alex Shelly in a match that meant a lot to him. He didn’t shake Shelly’s hand, but Shelly can come out here for a too sweet right now. Cue Shelly to say he won’t come down there and too sweet “Jamie”, who he lived with for a year and a half while he was making no money in Ring of Honor. Shelly knows that White is doing what he has to do but he is still hurting from those chops.

White says Shelly knew him but doesn’t know him now. He lists off everything about himself and says that everything in wrestling happens to him. Shelly says he is the king of a generation and influenced Kazuchika Okada, the Young Bucks and White himself. Chris Bey: “WHY ARE YOU HERE???” Shelly: “The adults were having a conversation.” Shelly brings out Chris Sabin, who says that the two of them being together makes them the best tag team around here. Next week: White/Bey vs. Motor City Machine Guns.

Josh Alexander wants Honor No More so Scott D’Amore gives him Matt Taven next week. After that, focus on Moose though.

Deonna Purrazzo doesn’t feel bad about what happened to Chelsea Green because she knew the risk. Gisele Shaw comes in to say she’d love to take the titles from Purrazzo but here is Lady Frost to say she beat Shaw at Sacrifice. Purrazzo gets tired of the fighting and makes a winner take all triple threat next week.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Rich Swann vs. Eddie Edwards

Swann is looking serious here and dives off the apron to jump Edwards early. We take a break and come back with the fight still on the floor before they head inside for the opening bell. Maria has joined commentary as well as Eddie chops away in the corner. An overhead belly to belly drops Swann but he manages to send Eddie to the apron for a 619. Swann misses a dive though and we take a break.

Back with Eddie hitting a clothesline but Swann grabs some rollups for two. They head to the apron with a headscissors taking Eddie down to the floor in a crash. Back in and some kicks rock Eddie but he’s fine enough to crotch Swann on top. The Backpack Stunner sets up a half crab, sending Swann crawling to the ropes. Back up and Swann kicks away at Eddie’s face, setting up some stereo kicks to put both of them down.

Eddie’s tiger driver is countered into a rollup for two and they strike it out again. Something close to a Blue Thunder Bomb gives Eddie two Now the tiger driver connects for two but Swann is back with a cutter. The Lethal Injection gets two on Eddie but the phoenix splash misses. The Boston Knee Party connects though and the Die Hard Driver finishes Swann at 18:10.

Rating: B. No surprise on this one as two talented wrestlers got a lot of time and had a good match as a result. Edwards is a legitimate ace for Honor No More and that is what they need, if nothing else for the sake of most of their wrestlers having no track record around here. Swann is not likely to get back to the top of the company, but he is still good for a match like this every time.

Honor No More poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Pretty solid show this week and the fact that we have a main event star ready to come after Moose makes things that much better. What matters here is they keep up the momentum and now we have a path towards Rebellion. Most of the card is yet to be determined, but at least they are already getting somewhere with the most important match.

Results
Willie Mack b. Kenny King – Six Star Frog Splash
Ace Austin b. John Skyler and Crazzy Steve – Fold to Steve
Chelsea Green/Mickie James/IInspiration b. Tasha Steelz/Savannah Evans/IInfluence – MickDT to Steelz
Eddie Edwards b. Rich Swann – Die Hard Driver

 

 

 

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Sacrifice 2022
Date: March 5, 2022
Location: Paristown Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Commentators: Tom Hannifan, Matthew Rehwoldt

This is the month’s Impact Plus special and the card is looking decent. There are a ton of title matches, capped off by Heath of all people getting the World Title shot. If that isn’t your thing, there are three Women’s Title matches, plus a hoss fight between Jonah and PCO. Let’s get to it.

Note that I was in attendance for the show, sitting in the balcony. That being said, I barely saw most of the show, as the balcony consists of a bunch of couches around the barricade and then some a handful of chairs behind it. I spent most of the show either in a chair or on my feet, trying to see a glimpse of the ring over the people around the barricade. It was probably the worst in-house experience I have ever had and I would absolutely not go back again. This will likely include the July return date that was announced during this show.

Pre-Show: Gisele Shaw vs. Lady Frost

Rematch from Shaw defeating Frost a few weeks back. Shaw goes for the arm to start but gets snapmared over for her efforts. A headscissors puts Shaw on the floor and Frost rolls along the apron to hurricanrana her down again. Back in and Shaw kicks her in the ribs, setting up a running elbow to the face.

Some forearms to the back of the head set up the corkscrew Vader Bomb to give Shaw two as the fans are behind Frost. Shaw gets knocked down in the corner, setting up a running Cannonball. Back up and Shaw grabs a hanging DDT for two, followed by a twisting suplex for the same. Frost gets in a knockdown of his own and goes up for a corkscrew moonsault and the pin at 6:01.

Rating: C. Frost is starting to grow on me but I’m surprised to see her pin Shaw. It seemed that Shaw was going to become a bigger deal around here but instead she lost on the pre-show to a non-pay per view. That being said, the division needs some fresh blood so maybe that is where Frost can come into play. Not a great match or anything, but you have to start somewhere.

Pre-Show: Matt Taven/Mike Bennett vs. Rich Swann/Willie Mack

Maria sits in on commentary. Swann starts fast with Bennett and dropkicks him into the corner, only to get caught in the wrong corner. That means some alternating shots from Taven and Bennett but Swann gets knocked over for the tag to Mack. Everything breaks down fast and it’s a Rock Bottom to drive Mack onto the apron. Swann is right there with a dive to take them out, followed by Mack being fine enough to hit a running flip dive of his own.

Back in and Taven catches Mack with a hanging DDT and the villains take over. A catapult sends Mack into Taven’s enziguri but he strikes his way to freedom. The hot tag brings in Swann to clean house, including the rolling splash for two on Taven. A flapjack into a bulldog gets the same with Bennett making the save but Taven runs Swann over. An exchange of kicks to the face lands Swann in the Proto Pack but Mack spears Taven. Swann sunset flips Bennett for the pin at 7:44.

Rating: C+. This picked things up a bit as Mack and Swann are always worth a look. At the same time, Bennett and Taven were one of the better Ring of Honor teams so there was some chemistry to be seen here. I’m still not sure where Honor No More is going, but losing here isn’t a bright sign for them tonight.

The opening video talks about what it means to sacrifice something. It often means to honor something, but in this world, nothing comes easy. The wrestlers will sacrifice their all for you, which shifts us to a focus on some of the matches.

X-Division Title: Trey Miguel vs. Jake Something

Something is challenging and easily wins a lockup to start. Miguel gets smart by striking away as fast as he can but the very springboardy wristdrag is blocked. Something’s clothesline takes Miguel down but he’s right back up with a dropkick. That doesn’t work for Something, who hits a heck of a sitout powerbomb (Miguel’s face on impact was great) for two before knocking a handspringing Miguel out of the air.

Miguel is back with some shots to the face but Something BLASTS HIM with a forearm. The running shoulder in the corner gets two on the champ, who is back with something like a snap Russian legsweep. A springboard spinning forearm puts Something down and Miguel nips back up. Some chops fire Something up though and a torture rack dropped down into a backbreaker gives him two. Miguel enziguris him to the floor though and a diving Canadian Destroyer gives us a pair of nasty thuds.

Thankfully they’re both fine and Something sends him hard into the corner, setting up a powerbomb. Something tries it again but this time Miguel reverses into a Meteora for two of his own. Miguel goes up but has to fight off Something, setting up the Cheeky Nandos kick. The 619 in the corner sets up a top rope Alberto Meteora to retain the title at 11:02.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of win that is going to help a champion like Miguel: being up against a bigger and stronger star and fighting from behind to eventually win. Miguel hung in there until he could get catch the big guy in something and it worked well. Good match here and the kind of match that is always going to work.

Here is what is coming on the rest of the show.

Tasha Steelz, with Savannah Evans, is ready to win the Knockouts Title from Mickie James and isn’t worried about Chelsea Green.

We recap Eddie Edwards vs. Rhino. Edwards turned on Team Impact at No Surrender to join Honor No More, which doesn’t have Rhino happy. Therefore, it is time for revenge.

Rhino vs. Eddie Edwards

The rest of Team Impact and Honor No More are all here too. Edwards misses a charge to start and gets knocked outside, where it’s time for a meeting with Honor No More. Back in and Eddie’s chops in the corner just annoy Rhino, who sends Eddie outside in front of Team Impact. Edwards dives back in, where Maria hands him Kenny the Kendo Stick.

That earns her an ejection so Rhino can punch away at Eddie’s head. Matt Taven trips him down from the floor though, which the referee somehow doesn’t notice. He also doesn’t notice Taven choking on the rope, allowing Eddie to take over in the corner. We hit the chinlock but Rhino is up before he even bothers getting down.

Rhino hits a running clothesline and a running shoulder in the corner but the fight breaks out on the floor. Vincent goes inside to hit a dive, followed by Rich Swann doing the same. Not to be outdone, Willie Mack goes up top for his own big dive, allowing Steve Maclin to run in and double arm DDT Edwards. He isn’t done though and kendo sticks Rhino down. That is enough to set up Edwards’ Boston Knee Party for the pin at 8:47.

Rating: C. There are a lot of things in wrestling you have to just get over, but there also comes a point where you can’t suspend your disbelief that far. That was the case here, as there was no reason to believe that the referee didn’t notice or care about something going on here. He didn’t notice the interference from either Honor No More or Maclin? Then fire him for being incompetent. The match itself was fine, but come on already.

We recap the IInfluence vs. the IInspiration for the Knockouts Tag Team Titles, which is really a battle over a personal photographer. That would be Kaleb With A K, who might be cheating on the IInfluence with the IInspiration.

The IInfluence tells Kaleb With A K to stay in the back and come out for pictures after they win the titles.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: IInfluence vs. IInspiration

The IInspiration (Cassie Lee/Jessie McKay) are defending against Tenille Dashwood/Madison Rayne. The referee holds up the titles and looks ANGRY for some reason. Well that was different. McKay shoulders Dashwood down to start so it’s quickly off to Rayne, who gets taken into the wrong corner. Lee armdrags her down for one and they go to an exchange of ones before Lee grabs an armbar.

Everything breaks down and the champs are sent head to head, only to clear the ring without much trouble. Dashwood takes out Lee on the floor and McKay kicks Dashwood in the face but gets posted. Back in and Madison chokes McKay in the corner before tying her in the Tree of Woe. That means Dashwood can get a running start to pull her by the hair, setting up the Taste of Tenille for two.

Lee starts getting up as McKay kicks Dashwood away and the hot tag brings her in. A quick suplex gives Lee two as the fans are way behind the IInspiration. Dashwood fights out of a double suplex and the Spotlight Kick gets two on Lee. Cue Kaleb With A K as Lee kicks Dashwood down for two as the referee finally starts clearing the ring. That’s enough for Kaleb With A K to send Dashwood one of the belts to knock Lee out and win the titles at 10:23.

Rating: C. You knew Kaleb With A K would be getting involved somehow and the question was whose side he would take. Changing the titles makes sense as it lets them build towards the IInspiration taking them back later. It isn’t like there is any kind of a division for the titles, so changing them here at least lets things be freshened up a bit.

Rhino is mad but tells Heath to stay in the back because he has a World Title match tonight. Anthony Carelli (Santino Marella) comes in to give Heath a pep talk, because if there is someone you want advice from, it’s Santino freaking Marella.

Brian Myers is here for his special commentary table but here is W. Morrissey to interrupt. Security comes in so Myers tries a cheap shot, which doesn’t go well. Morrissey goes for Myers, who runs off, leaving a security guard to get powerbombed through the table.

Jonah vs. PCO

Monster fight and there are no seconds for a change. They slug it out to start with Jonah knocking him into the corner. PCO comes right back with a neckbreaker and they’re out on the floor and it’s time to slug it out again. Jonah hits a Russian legsweep on the ramp before heading back inside for the chops.

In this case they just wake PCO up though and he unloads with chop after chop of his own in the corner. With Jonah knocked to the floor, PCO hits his own bit flip dive, setting up the top rope flip dive onto the apron. PCO heads up top but Jonah is right there for a heck of a top rope superplex, with the mat not rally bumping that much. Back up and they slug it out with an exchange of German suplexes before PCO no sells a DDT.

A suplex makes PCO vibrate and sit up so Jonah goes up top, earning himself a super hurricanrana back down. The PCOsault gets two but Jonah is ticked off this time. They head back outside with Jonah sending him into the steps and then hitting a TERRIFYING Tombstone onto the steps. Fans: “CHECK HIS PULSE!” Jonah isn’t done though and powerbombs him off the steps and onto the floor. Back in and a Tsunami to the back of the head finishes PCO at 11:30.

Rating: B-. This style might not be for everyone, but my goodness they were beating the fire out of each other here with some big man offense. Jonah hung with PCO and then beat him with three huge moves in the end. Good hoss style fight, though I did cringe hard on the Tombstone and powerbomb at the end. They look very cool, but dang they’re hard to see at times.

Jay White is ready to show Alex Shelley what he has learned around the world.

Jay White vs. Alex Shelley

Former student vs. former teacher and it is nice to hear that Motor City Machine Guns theme again. They stare each other down to start and circle each other as the fans start the dueling chants. The lockup takes over a minute to start and they trade standing switches until White bails to the ropes. Shelley grabs the arm and cranks away, setting up a middle rope knee to the arm.

An apron knee to the head rocks White again but he gets his knees up to block a slingshot splash. White hits a backbreaker and drops Shelley throat first across the top rope to send him outside. A drop on the barricade sets up a running elbow to the face back inside as Shelley keeps getting rocked. The waistlock keeps Shelley down but he fights up and hits a running forearm to the face.

Back up and White grabs a DDT, setting up a twisting suplex for two. Shelley manages a quick Downward Spiral into the middle buckle for a needed breather but White goes to the eye to cut that off. Some hard chops put Shelley down again but he’s right back up with his own series of chops. A quick Sliced Bread gives Shelley two and a superkick keeps up the comeback.

The Motor City Stretch is countered and so is the Bladerunner, meaning Shelley can get the Motor City Stretch. White makes the rope though and they crash out to the floor, where Shelley is driven into the apron. Back in and Shelley grabs a Bladerunner to set up the Motor City Stretch but White is right back out with the Bladerunner for the pin at 18:48.

Rating: B. This is kind of a match that you can always use on a wrestling show as they didn’t have any kind of a gimmick. Instead it was two talented people getting in the ring and showcasing what they can do, which is a lot more than some wrestlers are capable of doing. It’s the best thing on the show by a wide margin, as White gets a nice win to further establish him around here.

White mocks Shelly after the match.

Violent By Design says their business arrangement with the Good Brothers is over and it’s time to get their Tag Team Titles back, which is all by design. It’s still an Eric Young stable so I can’t bring myself to care.

Ring of Honor Women’s Title: Deonna Purrazzo vs. Chelsea Green

Green is challenging in the Champ Champ Challenge. Feeling out process to start with Green’s headlock being countered into a headscissors. Back up and Green sends her outside for a suicide dive, only to get clotheslined down back inside. Purrazzo starts cranking on the arm but Green is back with a sunset flip to set off a pinfall reversal sequence. They hit stereo pump kicks to the face and that’s a double knockdown. Green is up first with a running dropkick but I’m Prettier is broken up.

Instead Green hits her lifting Downward Spiral for two, only to have Purrazzo pull her into the Fujiwara armbar. Green reverses into one of her own though, sending Purrazzo straight to the ropes. Purrazzo has had it and uses her legs to snap Green’s arm but then panics at Green screaming in pain. That doesn’t last long though as Green forearms her down, causing Purrazzo to grab the Fujiwara armbar for the tap to retain at 8:18.

Rating: C. Green continues to be someone who seems to have all kinds of potential but never really wins the big one. Losing to Purrazzo is hardly a crushing defeat, but at some point Green needs to win something. That being said, the sound of that wrist snapping is chilling live and it came across almost as bad on TV. That might be because it seemed to be a legitimate injury, at least according to Green after the show. Just in case you thought she couldn’t have more bad luck I guess.

Post match Purrazzo keeps the hold on but here is Mickie James to chase her off. Since this show is running a bit long, that sounds like a good enough way to start the next match.

Knockouts Title Match: Tasha Steelz vs. Mickie James

Steelz, with Savannah Evans, is challenging as Green is still being tended to on the floor. The distracted James gets jumped from behind to start but stomps Steelz down in the corner to take over. Steelz misses a boot and gets pulled into a Boston crab but Evans goes after the injured Green as she is being taken out.

James goes after Evans for the save, allowing Steelz to sent her into the steps to take over again. Back in and Steelz kicks her into the corner before kicking her in the corner again. A basement kick to the face gives Steelz two and we hit the camel clutch. Mickie fights up with a backpack Stunner to escape but Steelz catches her on top. That means a big crash out to the floor and they slap it out back inside.

Mickie’s Thesz press lets her hammer away and a neckbreaker gets two. The MickDT connects but Evans comes in for the distraction. Steelz grabs the Black Out for two more so Mickie comes out of the corner with a hurricanrana. Back up and Steelz tries Stratusfaction but gets shoved off, allowing Mickie to grab a flapjack. Evans has to be kicked away again though, allowing Steelz to counter a dive into a cutter for the pin and the title at 14:09.

Rating: C. I’m still not sure what Impact sees in Steelz but this was the veteran putting someone young/new over and that is exactly what needed to happen. Impact picked someone and is running with them so well done on making the right move. The match was good enough too and the cutter for the finish looked nice.

We recap the Good Brothers vs. Violent By Design. The two had worked together to fight the Bullet Club but then the Brothers joined the Club, meaning it’s time for the title match.

Tag Team Titles: Violent By Design vs. Good Brothers

The Brothers are defending and have Chris Bey with them, while Deaner is with Violent By Design. Anderson and Young start things off with Young getting armdragged down. It works so well that Anderson does it again but Young gets over for the tag to Doering. Naturally that means Gallows comes in because this company loves itself some monster showdowns.

Gallows wins a battle of shoulders and drives in elbows to Doering’s chest. The chinlock doesn’t last long for Gallows, as Doering is back up with a running shoulder. It’s back to Anderson to run Young over and a big running backsplash connects for Anderson. Doering comes in to clean house and Young’s top rope else gets two. Anderson fights up and hands it back to Gallows for a reverse full nelson slam (Pete Gas’ old Gas Mask, and I’m scared that I remember that).

Doering comes back in for an AA to Anderson, setting up Young’s Death Valley Driver for two. Everyone heads to the corner for a not great Tower of Doom, leaving Doering on his feet. Anderson is back up with a spinebuster to Doering, who pops up and hits a running clothesline. Young takes Gallows up the ramp for a piledriver on the stage, leaving Anderson to get caught in a powerbomb/neckbreaker combination for the pin and the titles at 11:32.

Rating: C. At least they finally took the titles off of the Good Brothers, but putting them back onto Violent By Design isn’t much better. This is one of those stories that isn’t exactly doing much for me and I’m almost worried about where it is going. Maybe this will be a bit of fresh air, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up given who is involved.

We recap Moose vs. Heath for the World Title. Moose is champion, Heath wants a title shot, somehow this is the best they can do for a main event.

Anthony Carelli joins commentary because we’re just that lucky.

Impact Wrestling World Title: Moose vs. Heath

Moose is defending and throws Heath into the corner to start but Heath slips out and hammers away. A toss sends Heath flying across the ring though and Moose runs him over again. There’s a boot choke in the corner and a kick to the face cuts off Heath’s comeback attempt. Heath’s shirt is ripped open for some chops but he scores with a sidekick to put Moose on the floor.

That’s fine with Moose, who kicks him in the face and gets in a posting as this continues to be one sided. Heath gets pulled against the post and a whip into the barricade makes it worse. Back in and Moose stomps on the hand before switching over to the foot. A bite of Moose’s hand just makes Moose angrier and he sends Heath into the apron over and over. Heath fights up and manages to knock Moose outside for a slingshot dive but the Wake Up Call only gets two. Moose plants him with a release Rock Bottom and the spear retains the title at 12:12.

Rating: D+. This was a squash, with Heath’s limited offense not feeling like any kind of a threat. The match felt like a joke coming in and then that’s exactly what we saw throughout. I’m not sure why this was supposed to be anything else and the match was just a matter of killing time before the only conceivable ending.

Post match Josh Alexander returns to take Moose out. Alexander grabs the mic and says the last time he was here, Scott D’Amore sent him home. Well now he’s back, with a long term contract, which includes the title shot against Moose at Rebellion. Alexander celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. It turns out that the show is better when you can actually see the thing. This was a rather busy show with three title changes and some good matches. The ending helped a lot as Moose had no real contenders for the title, making Alexander the perfect person to bring back. Overall, the show was a good one, but not something that felt like it was a must see event. Kind of how it felt like it would be coming in.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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