Monday Night Raw
Date: February 21, 1994
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage

This is a weird one as the most recent show (from two weeks ago due to the Dog Show) was taped from the previous cycle, then this one is live, and then next week is taped again from the previous location. Other than that though, we have Razor Ramon and Marty Jannetty challenging for the Tag Team Titles, plus Bret Hart vs. a Heavenly Body. Which Heavenly Body? A Heavenly Body. Let’s get to it.

Here is the most recent episode if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Vince introduces Savage for commentary, which is a big update over Bastion Booger. Savage is excited to be here believe it or not.

Tag Team Titles: Quebecers vs. Razor Ramon/Marty Jannetty

The Quebecers, with Johnny Polo are defending. Actually hang on as we have a switch.

Tag Team Titles: Quebecers vs. Razor Ramon/1-2-3 Kid

The Quebecers, with Johnny Polo, are defending and we don’t get a reason for the switch. We start fast with Razor fall away slamming the Kid at Pierre and the champs need a breather on the floor. The stalling continues for a good while before they get back inside with Pierre slowing it down against Kid. He slows it down so much that Razor comes in for a top wristlock into a headlock.

Polo offers a distraction though, allowing the Quebecers to stomp away. Razor gets outside and Razor’s Edges Polo on the floor, which is about as big of the total destruction moves as you’ll see from this era. We take a break and come back with Razor handing it off to Kid to stay on Pierre’s arm. Razor comes back in to counter a leapfrog into an atomic drop, which Vince dubs accidental.

As I try to figure out what Vince would consider intentional, Kid starts working on the leg to mix it up. Razor gets kicked into the corner so Jacques comes in, earning himself a leg crank of his own. Cue Diesel to watch as Vince doesn’t approve of the refereeing. We take a break and come back with some heel miscommunication allowing the hot tag to the Kid.

A spinwheel kick bangs up Kid’s already injured knee and the champs drop him ribs first across the top rope. Jacques slams Pierre onto Kid for two but they try it again and get broken up, allowing the tag off to Razor. The belly to back superplex drops Jacques and there’s the Razor’s Edge to Pierre….but Shawn Michaels comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This got a LONG time but it wasn’t exactly exciting stuff for a long stretch. Shawn running in for the DQ is a fine way to retain the title and Razor/Kid would have been a better option to challenge for the titles than Razor and Jannetty anyway. Not a great match, but it felt big and that is a good thing.

Next week: Randy Savage vs. Yokozuna for the WWF Title. Well that’s an upgrade.

Jim Cornette comes out to shout about how Yokozuna will crush Savage, who disagrees.

Bret Hart vs. Tom Prichard

Jim Cornette is here with Prichard. Vince goes into a discussion of the Dallas Cowboys, which I would call an upgrade. Feeling out process to start with Bret’s headscissors not getting him anywhere. Bret does it again and we get another standoff. Back up and Bret grabs a headlock but gets drop toeholded down, setting up a hammerlock. A backdrop sends Prichard outside and Bret works on the arm back inside.

Vince points out Nikolai Volkoff at ringside, with Savage deeming him as ugly as ever. As you try to figure out why Volkoff was getting a story in 1994, Bret works on the arm, including a snapmare into an armbar as we take a break. Back with Prichard raking the eyes as we hear about Donny Wahlberg coming to Wrestlemania. We’re so lucky that he calls in to the show as Vince talks about listening to the new New Kids On The Block album.

Prichard grabs the chinlock as Donny denies having any jealousy of his brother Mark Wahlberg. A jawbreaker gets Bret out of trouble and a backslide gives him two. Prichard snapmares him down into a chinlock with a knee in the back. Cornette goes to get in a cheap shot with the tennis racket but Savage sends him into the steps to cut that off.

We take another break and come back with Bret grabbing a small package for two. The backbreaker into the middle rope elbow gets two as Savage has stolen the tennis racket, leaving Cornette looking really weird. Prichard knocks Bret outside and here is Owen Hart to throw him back inside. Bret doesn’t seem to mind and grabs the Sharpshooter to win.

Rating: C+. Bret got some time here and that is always often going to work. It helps when you have someone as talented as Prichard in there. I know he’s remembered as part of a pretty middle of the road team in the WWF but he really was good at what he did and could work just fine in this spot.

Post match Bret and Owen yell at each other a lot.

It’s the Wrestlemania Report with Todd Pettingill. Rather than matches though, we talk about the celebrities, because they’re what really matter. This includes two Showtime movie critics who used to be cab drivers, though I don’t think they were on the show. We get around to the matches, which is just a big list of them. This whole thing went over five minutes and didn’t add anything significant.

Little Richard is ready for Wrestlemania.

Jim Cornette and Yokozuna come to the ring to yell at Randy Savage, who is ready to go right now. Yelling ensues to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a rare show with two long matches and it set up some things for next week. The fact that next week is last week is a different story, but this was still in the formative years of the show. You can feel Wrestlemania season starting to come together though and I’m wanting to see how the build goes to one of the most important shows the company has ever had.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 23, 1995
Location: Keystone Center, Brandon, Manitoba, Canada
Attendance: 2,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We are fresh off of In Your House: Great White North, which featured one of the worst main events in company history as Diesel retained the WWF Title over the British Bulldog. Thankfully we are back to a live show this week after last week’s AWFUL show, meaning things can’t get any worse. Well in theory at least. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a quick pay per view recap and a quicker preview of this week’s show. This includes Diesel retaining the WWF Title and brawling with Bret Hart, plus Shawn Michaels having to forfeit the Intercontinental Title to Dean Douglas due to his injuries. Then about 14 minutes later, Razor Ramon beat Douglas to win the title.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Marty Jannetty, Bob Holly, Fatu, 1-2-3 Kid, Savio Vega, King Kong Bundy, Henry Godwinn, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Owen Hart, Jean Pierre LaFitte, Duke Droese, Bam Bam Bigelow, Skip, Rad Radford, Aldo Montoya, Barry Horowitz, Hakushi, Sid, Isaac Yankem, Kama Mustafa

The winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot against Razor Ramon next week. It’s a….well it’s a battle royal to start and Bundy, who hasn’t been around in months, is out fast. Aldo is tossed as Sid and Fatu keep fighting on and off. We are firmly in the brawling against the ropes with no one being eliminated phase until Holly is out, meaning we get race car jokes from commentary.

Sid kicks Droese out and Skip tosses Hakushi as we hear about the United Nations. Kama punches out Fatu as the ring is starting to clear out a bit. There goes Skip at Horowitz’s hands and we take a break. Back with some eliminations having taken place during the break, meaning we’re down to Jannetty, Yankem, Sid, Bigelow, LaFitte, Vega and Hart. There goes Yankem to get us down to six and Owen has to save himself. Bigelow knocks Sid out and we take another break.

Back again with Bigelow gone, meaning we’re down to four. Jannetty hits a clothesline on Owen and hammers away in the corner as Vince tries to tell us how interesting some of these people would be against Razor. Vega manages to save himself and avoids a spinwheel kick from Owen. Marty tosses Vega and LaFitte but Owen manages to hang on. A clothesline puts Owen on the apron but he (barely) holds on to various ropes to survive some right hands.

Back in and an enziguri rocks Marty, who manages to hang on as well. Owen sends him through the ropes, meaning Marty has to grab Jim Cornette’s tennis racket and chase him off, allowing British Bulldog to pop up and jump Jannetty. Back in and Marty makes ANOTHER comeback but Owen finally sends him out for the win and the title shot.

Rating: D. This was WAY too long and probably could have been done in about half the time, especially with how long it took to get rid of a lot of people. Owen vs. Razor will be fine for a title match but I would hope they could come up with a better way to set up the match than dragging King Kong Bundy out of mothballs. Bad match and even worse, it felt long.

Post break, Owen promises to win the Intercontinental Title.

We look back at Bret Hart getting involved with last night’s main event and brawling with Diesel after the match. They’re already set for the Survivor Series title match.

It’s time for the Survivor Series Slam Jam (Control Center) with the announcement of the Wild Card match. This is an idea that I could go for again, as they are having a Survivor Series match with friends and enemies being randomly paired together. That’s a nice twist and it could work again.

Bob Backlund is campaigning for Congress. In the wrong country.

Ahmed Johnson is ready for Survivor Series.

Avatar vs. Brian Walsh

Avatar is a masked ninja who comes to the ring unmasked before putting it on for the bell. Uh yeah. Avatar legdrags him down and cranks on the arm before hitting a superkick to the back of the head. A top rope dive has to be canceled so Avatar hits a slingshot dive instead as the crowd somehow goes even more quiet. Back in and Walsh hits some clotheslines but gets caught with a backbreaker. A standing moonsault and then a weird jumping splash finishes for Avatar. This gimmick was horrible of course, but Avatar would get a bit better when he would lose the mask and wrestle under the better name of Al Snow.

Next week: Goldust’s Raw debut.

Women’s Title: Alundra Blayze vs. Bertha Faye

Faye (a rather odd looking woman whose large size was emphasized) is defending and has her boyfriend Harvey Wippleman with her. Blayze gets run over to start and Faye drops some legs for two. Some chest bumps in the corner crush Blayze, whose sunset flip doesn’t get her very far. Faye sits on her chest as Lawler comments on Faye’s weight, because that’s the entire point of her being here. Blayze is knocked around again to continue the dominance as we take a break.

Back with Blayze being sent to the apron but managing to ram her face first into the buckle. A middle rope dropkick gets two on Faye (Big Bertha Faye according to Vince for the fifth or so time) and some running clotheslines connect for the same. Blayze takes her time loading up the powerbomb so Faye counters with a backdrop. Faye takes her own time going up though and a super hurricanrana pulls her back down. Harvey’s distraction fails and Blayze grabs the bridging German suplex for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. Commentary alone was hard to sit through and I was feeling sorry for Faye more than anything else. Blayze getting the title back was a fine story but come on with the treating Faye like some kind of disgusting slob. It’s one of those things that was bad at the time and then aged even worse, which is the case with too many things in this company’s history. Blayze wouldn’t lose the title, but she would indeed drop it a few months later.

We get a sitdown interview with Shawn Michaels, who has two banged up eyes after being wrecked by an unclear number of Marines (or Marine). Shawn worked hard to earn the Intercontinental Title and then he had to hand it over to someone he finds very overrated. Jim Ross brings up the Survivor Series Wild Card match but Shawn has to have more brain tests next week.

Lawler is near very real tears after the interview.

Overall Rating: D+. It was a two match show and neither of those matches were exactly good. That being said, you can indeed feel the difference between last week’s taped garbage and this week’s live show, which just wasn’t very good. There is a different energy there and it made a lot of difference. Now if they can actually have a good show next week, that might help the Survivor Series build, but we have a few weeks before we get there.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 14, 2008
Location: Mobile Civic Center, Mobile, Alabama
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The rise of Jeff Hardy continues as we are less than two weeks away from his showdown with Randy Orton at the Royal Rumble. You can feel the momentum building and Hardy feels like he could actually pull off the miracle win. Why the Intercontinental Champion feels like such an underdog is beyond me, but we should be in for more of him tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of last week’s highlight reel moment of Jeff Hardy Whispering In The Wind off the top of the cage to beat Umaga.

Here is Hardy to get things going. Hardy has a chance to become WWE Champion at the Royal Rumble but he wants Randy Orton out here right now. Cue Orton to the stage to say he wants Hardy to defend the Intercontinental Title against him TONIGHT. Hardy is in and we have a main event.

We look at Vince McMahon putting Ric Flair’s career in jeopardy in case you haven’t been watching in a few months.

Ashley Massaro/Maria/Mickie James vs. Melina/Jillian Hall/Beth Phoenix

Jillian takes Ashley down and hammers away to start as commentary talks up the ring attire. Maria comes in for a scorpion kick to Melina, who chokes her on the ropes to even things up. We complete the trio of pairings as Mickie comes in with a headscissors to Phoenix as everything breaks down. Everyone else fights to the floor and Beth drops Mickie throat first onto the top rope. The fisherman’s buster gives Beth the pin.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what you would expect from it as Mickie and Beth did the only wrestling of the match while the rest of it was built around brawling and catfighting. Beth still needs a new challenger and other than Mickie, I’m not sure who could give her a serious challenge. At least it was short, but that quiet crowd tells you a lot.

Vince McMahon yells at William Regal, who promises to end Ric Flair’s tonight. McMahon whips out….an enema, which belongs in Mobile, Alabama. Snitsky comes in to say he wants to hurt Flair, but Vince gives him HHH instead.

WWE HD is coming!

Classic Royal Rumble clip: Shawn Michaels vs. the Undertaker in the final two last year. Yep that fits.

Here is Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn can’t believe that he has to win a qualifying match because he is the defending runner up and a two time winner. He was going to challenge Mr. Kennedy Kennedy anyway, so let’s just make that the qualifying match instead. Here’s his real opponent though.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Shawn Michaels vs. Trevor Murdoch

Murdoch strikes away to start and hits a quick atomic drop. A whip into the corner gives Murdoch two but Shawn is back with chops and a Thesz press. There’s the top rope elbow and a little dance sets up the superkick….but Murdoch is ready for it. That’s fine with Shawn, who sweeps the legs and puts on something like an inverted Figure Four for the tap.

Post match Mr. Kennedy pops up on screen to say he can’t believe how bad Shawn is at letting things go. Shawn can’t handle that Kennedy beat him and has passed him by. Someone has proven that he is better, but why would Kennedy accept the challenge for next week? Eh why not though? Kennedy is in for next week. Murdoch tries to jump Shawn and gets superkicked.

We look back at Ric Flair surviving against Randy Orton.

We look at Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior at Wrestlemania VI, I’m assuming because Randy Orton could win the Intercontinental Title tonight.

Royal Rumble rundown.

Vince McMahon is worried about Hornswoggle being in the Royal Rumble so let’s give Hornswoggle some experience tonight. We’ll have a mini Royal Rumble, with Hornswoggle in at #1 and then Mr. Kennedy, Mankind and Batista, plus some surprises. Hornswoggle knows he isn’t likely going to win the Royal Rumble but Vince chokes him anyway. That was harsh.

HHH vs. Snitsky

Snitsky kicks him in the corner to start but HHH clotheslines his way to freedom. A missed charge sends Snitsky outside and we take an early break. Back with Snitsky whipping him hard into the corner and dropping some elbows for two. The bearhug goes on and HHH actually goes down to one knee, but he’s fine enough to reverse a pump handle slam and hit a DDT. The Pedigree is countered with a backdrop over the top, with Snitsky sending him into the steps to increase the pain. A big steps shot misses though and HHH hits him with a chair for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was HHH fighting a monster and getting tired of things getting that violent so he went bit with a weapon of his own. Snitsky is fine as a monster of the week/month because he looks that evil but it wasn’t like he was a threat to HHH. I can go for something like this over Snitsky taking the Pedigree so at least they mixed it up a bit.

Post match, a sledgehammer shot and the Pedigree leave Snitsky laying again. HHH goes to leave but Vince McMahon pops up on screen to say HHH can’t keep being violent just because he isn’t in the Royal Rumble. He needs to calm down, but HHH hits the video screen with the sledgehammer to make it explode a bit.

Post break Vince yells at HHH and says he can be back in the Royal Rumble, but only if he can win next week against….someone.

Here is JBL, complete with balloon drop, to say that someone promised to return to Raw to save the show. That would be Chris Jericho, who was a complete failure. We look at JBL taking Jericho out last week and choking him with a cable. So where is Jericho now? He’s at home, recovering, where he belongs. Last week, it was like JBL was carrying everyone around this arena. Now JBL wants Jericho to talk to his children and tell them that JBL is just better. If Jericho comes to the Royal Rumble, the Savior is going to need to be saved. Pyro ensues.

HHH was both WWE and Intercontinental Champion at No Mercy 2002. Good thing they had these clips ready just in case Orton challenged Hardy tonight.

Mini Royal Rumble

We have five entrants and thirty second intervals. Hornswoggle is in at #1 and….a miniature Mr. Kennedy in at #2. Since Kennedy can’t reach the mic, Hornswoggle hits a dropkick to start fast but misses a charge into the corner. Mini Mankind is in at #3 and busts out Mr. Socko but Hornswoggle puts it in his mouth and tosses him out. Kennedy is eliminated as well so here is Mini Batista in at #4.

This one is a bit bigger and hits a spear but can’t get rid of Hornswoggle. Mini Kane is in at #5 and gets Batista Bombed, only to have Hornswoggle toss Batista. Kane hits the uppercuts and the middle rope clothesline but Hornswoggle elbows his way out of a chokeslam. The Celtic Cross lets Hornswoggle get rid of Batista…..and the real Great Khali is in at #6. Batista jumps Hornswoggle but here is Finlay to jump Khali and beat up Runjin Singh for a bonus. Singh is tossed and that’s enough for Hornswoggle to win.

Rating: D. I chuckled a few times but Vince sending Khali after Hornswoggle and having Finlay make the save was a tired idea a long time ago and now it is only getting worse. How many times can they do the same bit with these guys? Some of the minis were funny enough though so it could have been worse, but this story needs to end already.

Post break, Finlay storms into Vince McMahon’s office and yells at him, but Vince says Finlay better keep their deal. An annoyed Finlay leaves.

William Regal vs. Ric Flair

We’re joined in progress with Regal working on Flair’s knee but Flair dives over and reaches the rope. Flair shows him how to start working on the knee but lets go as soon as Regal makes the rope as well. Back up and Regal yells at the referee, allowing Flair to grab a rollup for the pin. This feels like it was cut for time.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy is defending. The bell rings and Orton kicks him low for the DQ.

Orton says we’re not done and the fight is on, with Hardy fighting back as they go up the ramp. Hardy knocks him off the stage….and then goes up onto the lighting structure. And I mean WAY up onto the structure, far higher than you would see on the top of a cage. The biggest Swanton ever crushes Orton and they’re both done in a heap. Medics tend to both of them (as commentary is SILENT) to end the show. This wasn’t as good as last week’s Whisper In The Wind but DANG Hardy was up there.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t great, but the problem with the last shows before the Royal Rumble is that the card is mostly set and the Rumble itself doesn’t need much build. Hardy vs. Orton feels like a major showdown and the Rumble will be big by definition, so that doesn’t leave much left to do on this show. Maybe next week can be a bit better, but I’m not exactly looking forward to what we’re getting.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 9, 1995
Location: Grand Center, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

We’re still on the way towards In Your House: Great White North but first we have to get a pretty big six man tag out of the way. This week, Camp Cornette will face Diesel, Undertaker and Shawn Michaels, which is a pretty big main event on any Raw. Other than that, maybe we can get some build towards the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence (dig that helicopter deal).

Shawn Michaels spoke to a group of students who had very high attendance and seems genuinely choked up by it. That’s not something you would regularly see from 90s Shawn.

Camp Cornette vs. Diesel/Shawn Michaels/Undertaker

That would be Owen Hart/British Bulldog/Yokozuna with Jim Cornette in their corner. Joined in progress with Shawn hammering on Owen and armdragging him into an armbar. Shawn clotheslines him over the top but skins the cat to stay inside, because Shawn is awesome like that. Everything breaks down and the villains are knocked to the floor, leaving Cornette rather flummoxed.

We settle down to Diesel beating up Bulldog and sending him outside where Undertaker choke….tosses him back inside. Undertaker comes in for Old School on Yokozuna but the Samoan drop cuts that off rather quickly. That doesn’t last long either as Undertaker grabs the running DDT and hands it off to Shawn to crank on the arm. You don’t do that to Yokozuna, who crushes Shawn and brings Owen in to hit a backbreaker.

Cue Waylon Mercy (basically 90s Bray Wyatt) to scout his match with Diesel and not much more. Bulldog adds the gorilla press, meaning the triple teaming can continue having Vince in hysterics as we take a break. Back with Owen grabbing an abdominal stretch as Dean Douglas comes out to watch too. The referee catches Bulldog helping Owen though and kicks the arms apart, allowing Shawn to get two off a backslide.

Since it’s just a backslide, Bulldog is able to come back in with a delayed vertical suplex as Diesel and Undertaker get angrier and angrier on the apron. Owen grabs the chinlock for a bit, followed by a spinwheel kick for two. That lets Owen go up for a top rope splash which….I have no idea as we take a break with Owen in the air.

Back with Owen and Shawn both down and crawling over for a tag. Bulldog and Diesel both come in with the latter hitting a side slam on Bulldog but having to go after Owen and Yokozuna as well. The distraction lets Bulldog hit the running powerslam but Undertaker makes the save. With Undertaker removed though, Bulldog gets the pin anyway as we get the hard push towards In Your House.

Rating: B. This was the kind of six man tag that is always going to work and the surprise ending does help boost up the pay per view title match. The good thing about this kind of a match is that you can put any combination together and get something out of it, which was the case here on a bit of a smaller scale. Mercy and Douglas didn’t add much here but I’ll take that over them watching awkwardly in the back. Rather good stuff here and a better than average Raw match.

Post match King Mabel comes in and, with Yokozuna’s help, crushes Undertaker in the corner. A bunch of legdrops crush Undertaker as Dean Douglas beats on Shawn and whips him into the steps. Splashes, legdrops and elbows continue as the good guys are thoroughly crushed. If I remember right, this was originally planned to end the show but Vince decided that it needed a happier ending, so the change was made.

Post break and the good guys are still being taken out.

We look back at Bret Hart beating Jean Pierre LaFitte but getting jumped by Isaac Yankem after the match. The result: a cage match next week.

Diesel, Shawn and Undertaker are back up.

We see part of Bret Hart beating Isaac Yankem at Summerslam via DQ when Yankem choked him in the ropes. Actually we see a lot of it so here’s the match from Summerslam.

Isaac Yankem vs. Bret Hart

Lawler handles Yankem’s entrance. As a bonus pun, Yankem is billed from Decay-tur, Illinois. Lawler is on commentary for a bit of a surprise as Bret gets shoved down to start. Yankem misses a big elbow but is fine enough to send Bret hard into the corner. Bret is back with an atomic drop and a clothesline for a trip to the floor. Back in and Bret hits a middle rope clothesline, followed by the headbutt to the abdomen.

The backslide gets two as Lawler is saying only Vince needs to be impartial tonight. Another hard whip into the corner takes Bret down again and Isaac chokes on the ropes until the referee drags him away by the hair. More choking ensues as Yankem doesn’t have the highest variety in his offense so far.

Bret is back up and sends him outside for a suicide dive as the comeback is on. Back in and it’s time for the Five Moves Of Doom but a Lawler distraction breaks up the Sharpshooter. Lawler stays up to cheer on Yankem’s beating (as he should) but Bret gets in a slam off the top for a rare power display.

In a change of pace, Bret ties Yankem’s legs around the post and stomps away until the referee unties Yankem’s feet. Lawler would do it but he’s too busy getting beaten up by Bret. The distraction lets Yankem hit a top rope ax handle to the back and Lawler helps him tie Bret’s neck in the ropes for the DQ at 16:10.

Rating: C+. Bret was doing everything he could here but Yankem wasn’t there yet and there’s only so much you can do as an evil dentist. The match felt straight out of Memphis with someone wanting to get at Lawler but he brought in his latest monster for protection. It’s a perfectly usable story and the match wasn’t bad, so I’ll take what I can get here.

Post match Lawler and Yankem pull at the still trapped Bret until referees break it up.

Skip vs. Fatu

Sunny is here with Skip, who isn’t making a difference like Fatu. Skip hammers away to start before grabbing a wristlock. For some reason Skip tries to ram him head first into the buckle and yeah that’s not how wrestling works. Sunny gets on the apron to get Fatu to chase her outside, allowing Skip to get in a few cheap shots. An enziguri drops Fatu for two and Sunny is NOT pleased with the kickout.

Skip goes for the head again, with Vince calling him an idiot as a result. The chinlock goes on as Lawler insists he will NOT be put in a shark cage during next week’s cage match and rants about President Gorilla Monsoon for a bit too. Back up and Skip tries a headbutt (Vince: “WHAT AN IDIOT!”), which only gives himself a headache. Skip catches him on top but hurts his back on a superplex attempt, setting up the top rope splash to give Fatu the pin.

Rating: C-. It isn’t a good sign when the best part of a match is hearing Vince call someone in the match an idiot, but that is about all we had here. Skip was a talented guy but how far is he going to go when his name is Skip and he is overshadowed by Sunny? The match was longer than it needed to be, but Fatu’s hard head bit was enough to keep it lively.

We look back at the six man tag and ensuing beatdown.

Doc Hendrix was in the men’s locker room and isn’t going to be interviewing Undertaker, Diesel and Shawn Michaels because they are too banged up.

Camp Cornette is very happy with what happened and Jim Cornette is ready for British Bulldog to take the title from Diesel at In Your House. We get a promise of a powerslam through the mat and Bulldog being the new WWF Champion. Bulldog promises to win the title as well because Diesel can’t run and hide. King Mable comes in to brag about destroying Undertaker and prove how awesome he really is. Of note: Mabel’s crown looked stupid and Bulldog shouldn’t wear a hat.

Jerry Lawler knows Bret Hart has been begging for help with him and is ready for next week’s cage match. Oh and he will NOT be in that cage.

A video on next week’s cage match wraps us up.

Overall Rating: C+. The opener was rather good and that is about all there is to the show, because the rest was about the possible injuries and Camp Cornette/Mabel bragging. Oh and Skip vs. Fatu, because they needed something else on the show other than one long six man. That being said, Cornette was right (if I’m remembering it right), as ending with that huge beatdown and doing regular stuff for the first half would have been better with a big cliffhanger ending.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: October 2, 1995
Location: Grand Center, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Attendance: 1,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

I’m back to Raw as the WWF is on the way towards In Your House: Great White North. In this case, that means WWF Champion Diesel will be defending against the British Bulldog, which is as In Your House of a main event as you can get. Other than that, we are in that weird period between Summerslam and Survivor Series so this isn’t the hottest stretch. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Yokozuna accidentally splashing Owen Hart last week, allowing the Smoking Gunns to take the Tag Team Titles from them.

Here’s a quick clip of Lawrence Taylor beating Bam Bam Bigelow on the Wrestlemania Special from over the weekend, as we look at a match from about six months ago.

Razor Ramon vs. 1-2-3 Kid

This is billed as the last match between the two and that isn’t the most out there of possibilities. Two weeks ago, Dean Douglas helped 1-2-3 Kid beat Razor (which Kid didn’t see) so tonight it’s a fair fight. Razor sends him outside to start but Kid is right back in with the rapid fire kicks in the corner. The fall away slam gives Razor two, only to have Kid come back with another kick for two of his own.

Cue Douglas to watch in the aisle as Razor punches Kid down but he leaves as Kid makes the comeback. Razor hits one heck of a clothesline for the pin and yes it’s as out of nowhere as it sounds. Hold on though as Kid slaps Razor in the face and I guess we’re just going to keep going. Razor chops him in the corner and grabs the abdominal stretch. A charge in the corner hits Kid’s raised boot though and we take a break.

Back with apparently a third fall, as Razor powerbombed him for the pin during the break, only to have Kid want to keep going. The belly to back superplex sets up the Razor’s Edge, but Razor lets him go and grabs a small package to pin Kid, who is already out cold thanks to the superplex.

Rating: C-. This was a weird one as Razor more or less squashed him three times in a row with Kid only managing a few kicks. Commentary kept hyping up the idea of it being about respect, which worked well enough as Kid wouldn’t stay down despite clearly being outclassed. Odds are there is more to this in the future, even with this one sided beating.

Respect is shown post match but Kid grabs a rollup for two, with the referee just going with this. Kid tells him to hit the Razor’s Edge but Razor shakes his hand instead.

We look back at British Bulldog and Yokozuna wrecking Undertaker last week until Shawn Michaels and Diesel made the save.

IS OJ SIMPSON GUILTY??? Call in and vote, with your 50 cents a call going to help prevent child abuse. Eh it’s for charity so fair enough.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Barry Horowitz

Horowitz is fresh off beating Skip a few times so it’s pretty much the hottest time of his career. Helmsley takes him down into something like a cross armbreaker, allowing for a kick to the face. A takedown has Helmsley bailing to the ropes as Vince brags about last week’s Raw being the most watched in history. Helmsley’s curtsy sets up a suplex as Lawler talks about the Simpson case.

Back up and Horowitz grabs a sunset flip for two, which just seems to annoy Helmsley. As expected, this leads to a discussion of the Pope coming to the United States, and Vince would love for him to come to the charity show at Madison Square Garden. Horowitz gets an elbow to the face into an abdominal stretch rollup for two (Patterson and Brisco’s back grapple special in No Mercy) but the Pedigree finishes him off out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. This went a bit long but the good thing is that Horowitz felt like he could pull off the upset. That is what you get out of the wins over Skip, as Horowitz goes from a total loser to someone who just won a few weeks ago. At the same time though, Helmsley was still new and undefeated at this point so he wasn’t about to be in any serious jeopardy to anyone, let alone Horowitz.

PG-13 vs. Al Brown/Sonny Rogers

PG-13’s (they’re white rappers from Memphis) USWA Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line but they want the Smoking Gunns’ WWF Tag Team Titles. Rogers works on Ice’s arm to start but it’s a running dropkick/Russian legsweep combination to take him down. Wolfie D knocks Rogers down and dances a lot as Lawler talks about the Simpson case gain. Rogers gets away and brings in Brown to clean house as Vince still can’t remember which one is PG and which one is 13. The illegal Wolfie uses a distraction to hit a middle rope bulldog for two on Brown before an assisted splash finishes for JC Ice.

Rating: C. PG-13 looked decent in there for a team who was far better known for their gimmick than anything they did in the ring. It isn’t like they were ever going to be anything important in the company but the annoying rapping deal will always work to some degree. If they can have an ok squash at the same time, that’s even better.

CALL THE SIMPSON HOTLINE!

Bret Hart vs. Jean-Pierre LaFitte

Rematch from Bret’s victory at the most recent In Your House. LaFitte pounds him into the corner to start and a hard clothesline drops Bret again. A missed charge in the corner sends LaFitte crashing out to the floor, where Vince sends him into the steps. This lets Vince call the match a “demolition derby” for about the fifth time in less than three minutes.

Back in and Bret gets dropped throat first onto the ropes, setting up the chinlock. A heck of a clothesline keeps Bret in trouble and a top rope headbutt gets two. LaFitte’s Stinger Splash sets off the LET’S GO BRET chants but another clothesline cuts off another comeback (that’s working for LaFitte).

We take a break and come back with LaFitte missing the Cannonball but running Bret over for two more anyway. They head outside again with Bret being whipped hard into the steps, sending Lawler into euphoria on commentary (Lawler’s hatred of Bret was always funny). Back in and Bret is fine enough to start the comeback, with the Russian legsweep getting two. LaFitte grabs a Regal Roll but the Cannonball is cut off again. Bret superplexes him down and puts on the Sharpshooter for the win.

Rating: B-. The match got some time and while it wasn’t quite as good as their In Your House match, there is still something to be said about any Bret match going almost fifteen minutes. Not exactly a hidden gem, but Bret being able to get something out of a pirate in 1995 is pretty impressive. Good enough here, but Bret needs to move on to something more important.

Post match Lawler yells at Bret, who goes after him until Isaac Yankem jumps Bret from behind.

Post break Vince announces a cage match between Hart and Yankem at some point in the coming weeks.

Camp Cornette is ready for Undertaker, Shawn Michaels and Diesel next week.

Undertaker, Shawn Michaels and Diesel are ready for Camp Cornette next week.

The fans say OJ Simpson is not guilty by a margin of 51-49.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t the best show but the main event and setup for the cage match worked well enough. Bret going from fighting a pirate to fighting a king to fighting a dentist is about as 1995 as you can get but at least we didn’t have to deal with King Mabel. The rest of the show wasn’t much to see, though Razor vs. Kid was certainly something different.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: January 7, 2008
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the first Raw of the new year and we’re starting big with Raw Roulette. The show will basically be a bunch of Spin The Wheel Make The Deal matches and that should make for some interesting options. I say should because it probably won’t, but at least they’re doing something. Oh and there will be a lot about Ric Flair, because we need to do that as often as possible. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s main event with William Regal costing HHH a spot in the Royal Rumble, but Ric Flair’s career was saved again.

William Regal is in Vince McMahon’s office and tells him that the fans are expecting something big from Raw Roulette on the first Raw of the year. Vince goes over some of the options and you can hear the salesman in him, which is where he tends to shine. As for HHH, Vince wants to see him injured so Regal can face him tonight. We spin the wheel and it’s…..First Blood. Regal seems to approve and leaves, only to get jumped by an angry HHH.

Opening sequence.

Here are Shawn Michaels and Mr. Kennedy and the wheel gives them….a Strange Bedfellows match, meaning they’re going to be partners!

Shawn Michaels/Mr. Kennedy vs. Charlie Haas/Trevor Murdoch

We’re joined in progress with Kennedy dropping Haas for two but Shawn tags himself in and throws Kennedy outside. Then Haas goes to the floor as well, puts on a superhero mask, declares IT’S TIME, and gets slingshotted back inside. Murdoch gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and a clothesline gives him two.

Haas comes back in but gets dropped, only to have Kennedy bail to the floor to avoid a tag. Shawn doesn’t seem to mind and rips Haas’ mask off before starting the comeback. Sweet Chin Music knocks Murdoch off the apron but Kennedy tags himself in, just before Shawn superkicks Haas as well. The Mic Check drops Shawn and Kennedy pins Haas.

Rating: C. Haas and Murdoch were little more than props here and that isn’t the worst idea. What mattered here was keeping Michaels vs. Kennedy going and it wouldn’t surprise me to see them have their big blowoff at the Rumble. The wrestling wasn’t the point here and in this case that’s ok.

Carlito vs. Hardcore Holly

Trading Places match, meaning they’re dressed as each other, but we don’t even get to see the spin of the wheel, which is the best part of the show. Santino Marella and Cody Rhodes are here too, but hang on as Holly has trouble with his big afro. It doesn’t stay on long but Carlito uses the distraction to stomp away and take over. Carlito hits a chop in the corner but Holly shows him how it’s really done to start the comeback. There’s the dropkick so Santino offers a distraction. Since it’s Santino, that doesn’t exactly go well as Holly intercepts the apple and spits it in Carlito’s face. The Alabama Slam finishes for Holly.

Rating: C-. This was mainly there for the visual gag of Holly in a wig so there was no need to have the match get any kind of time. There isn’t much to the tag division at the moment but would Carlito/Marella be huge underdogs against Holly and Rhodes? Carlito in a blond wig was a bit confusing as he did look like Holly, so they got half of the visual quite right.

Maria spins the wheel for her match and it lands on submission match, but Vince McMahon changes it to a lingerie pillow fight. For some reason, Vince feels the need to explain the concept. This results in Maria making a joke about having natural pillows.

Video on Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy, including Orton kicking an injured Matt Hardy last week.

Jeff Hardy promises to take Randy Orton out.

Vince McMahon has Hornswoggle spin the wheel and gives him a talk about….I have no idea as the audio is all screwed up, with JR apologizing for the issues.

Post break we see a repaired version of the video, which saw Vince put Hornswoggle in the Royal Rumble, but first he has to qualify. It’s a Mr. McMahon’s Choice match, so we’ll have a tag match with Hornswoggle getting to pick his partner, with the winning team qualifying. Finlay isn’t here, but Hornswoggle seems confident.

Maria vs. Jillian Hall vs. Mickie James vs. Melina

Lingerie pillow fight, meaning there is a bed with a bunch of pillows on it provided. Lawler: “Why do all of these Divas have all of this great looking lingerie with them every week?” Hold on though as we have a surprise bonus.

Maria vs. Jillian Hall vs. Mickie James vs. Melina vs. Ashley

Jillian and Melina try to hide under the bedspread and get beaten up with the pillows. Maria gives Jillian a Bronco Buster and Mickie tries to powerbomb Melina onto the bed. We get some “vicious” pillow attacks and Jillian is tossed into Melina. Ashley drops an elbow for the pin.

Rating: D-. It’s a good example of a match where the concept is obvious but it’s just so dumb that the charm was lost. Everyone is just oh so happy to be out there with their friends and it comes off as so stupid. There is enough talent in there to get over without this stuff and it’s annoying to have to see.

Super Crazy turns down Hornswoggle’s offer to team up but Hornswoggle sees someone else off camera who gets his attention.

HHH vs. William Regal

First blood. HHH wastes no time in taking the brawl to the floor but misses a toss with the steps. Regal posts him head first and they head back inside where a turnbuckle pad is taken off. Right hands and a knee drop stay on the face but HHH is back with a facebuster. A kick to the head drops HHH again and the fans are all over Regal. The brass knuckles shot is broken up with a spinebuster, allowing HHH to unload with right hands to bust Regal open for the win.

Rating: C. This was short and to the point but mainly just made me want to see these two have a regular match. You can’t do much in a five minute First Blood match but HHH pounding on Regal’s face until it was busted open was quite the visual. Regal is a good lackey who can fight and he wasn’t squashed here, but a First Blood match needs more time than this.

Post match HHH hits a Pedigree.

Video on Jeff Hardy vs. Randy Orton.

Santino Marella turns Hornswoggle down too because he doesn’t want Vince mad at him and small people freak him out. Hornswoggle is dejected.

We recap JBL vs. Chris Jericho, which stems from Jericho being annoyed at getting bumped into. Then they yelled at and punched each other a lot.

Chris Jericho comes to the ring and finds out that he is in a handicap match.

Chris Jericho vs. Snitsky/John Bradshaw Layfield

Snitsky hammers away in the corner to start but gets caught with the running forearm. Some stomping has Jericho in more trouble but he’s back up with the triangle dropkick to the floor. The brawl with JBL is on outside, at least until JBL hits him with the bell for the fast DQ.

Post match the beatdown continues, with JBL pounding away and choking with a microphone cable. JBL even drags him up the aisle by the cord to make things extra violent.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Highlanders vs. Hornswoggle/BH Jordan

Jordan is a rather skinny guy but hang on as someone comes out to take his place.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Highlanders vs. Hornswoggle/Mick Foley

Foley hammers away at Robbie to start and it’s off to Hornswoggle for a running kick to the face. Rory comes in for a faceplant but a slide through the legs allows the tag off to Foley. The Highlanders actually take him into the corner to start up the double teaming. Foley fights him off like he’s Mick Foley beating up the Highlanders, including the Mandible Sock to Rory and a double arm DDT to Robbie. Hornswoggle comes in with the tadpole splash for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing wrong with Foley coming in to save Hornswoggle from a low level team. Foley in the Rumble in the Garden will be nice and Hornswoggle has been featured far too much lately to not be around in some way. They kept it quick here and the fans were into Foley so it went well enough. That being said, egads the Highlanders fell fast, despite not even being that high up in the first place.

The cage is lowered, as the stipulation was already set.

Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

Non-title in a cage and Randy Orton is watching from ringside. Umaga runs him over to start but misses a sitdown splash. A jawbreaker staggers Umaga and he misses a charge into the cage in the corner. Back up and Umaga launches him into the cage but Hardy hangs on in an impressive counter. It’s too early to go over the top though as Umaga pulls him back down for a crash as we take a break.

We come back with Umaga working on a nerve hold for a good while. A backdrop into the cage rocks Hardy again and Umaga splashes him up against the cage for a bonus. Hardy manages a few right hands so Orton throws in a bunch of chairs to give Umaga weaponry. A chair to the back has Hardy in trouble but he’s fine enough to crotch a climbing Umaga on top. Springboard Poetry In Motion drives Umaga into the corner but the Twist of Fate is easily blocked.

The running hip attack misses though and Hardy LAUNCHES a chair at Umaga’s head to stagger him again. A DDT onto a chair gives Hardy two but Orton slams the door on his head to cut off the escape. The Samoan Spike is blocked though and now the Twist of Fate connects. Hardy goes up, sees Orton waiting on him below, and dives off the cage with a Whisper In The Wind to knock Umaga silly for the pin.

Rating: B. That’s almost all for the finish as otherwise it was a run of the mill cage match with some good spots. What mattered here was Hardy coming off like a superhero with that Whisper in the Wind and Orton looking scared of what is waiting on him at the Rumble. I remember watching this live and being completely sold on Hardy beating Orton. It had me needing to see the title match because I knew Hardy could win. That’s a nice feeling to have and it worked to perfection here.

Overall Rating: C. The main event is more than enough to carry the show, but the Raw Roulette stuff was only so good. They didn’t even show some of the spins and the matches didn’t exactly blow anyone away. What matters here is Hardy, as Orton is starting to realize he could be in trouble and that feels different for him. I liked parts of the show, but the Rumble itself needs some more build. More on that next week, but for now, it’s all about Hardy and that’s really cool to see.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 31, 2007
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re wrapping up the year with this one as Raw is back to a regular show after last week’s Tribute To The Troops. There is a big main event set up for this week as Ric Flair is defending his career against HHH in one of his most famous locations. That’s quite the way to finish off the year so let’s get to it.

We open with a video on Randy Orton, who is officially the Greatest Raw Superstar Of 2007.

Here is Orton in the ring to get things going. Orton says the letters RKO define this year and promises to be even more ruthless next year. Either way, he will be WWE champion, but here is Jeff Hardy to interrupt. Hardy says Orton had a great year but right now, he doesn’t have momentum. We see a clip of Hardy pinning Orton last week, which Hardy says he can do it. Orton says ask Chris Jericho, Shawn Michaels and John Cena about momentum and threatens Hardy. An RKO attempt is countered into a Twist of Fate and Hardy gets to pose as the build continues to grow.

Video on Ric Flair’s dilemma, as he has to retire the next time he wins a match, as per Vince McMahon’s orders. For a bonus, Vince is making Flair face his friend HHH tonight.

Matt Hardy is here to see Jeff Hardy and thinks the Royal Rumble could be Jeff’s night. In addition, Matt might be back at the Rumble and if Jeff wins that night, how about Matt gets the first title shot? Jeff could go for that, but Matt shouldn’t expect to win.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Shawn Michaels

They start fast with Kennedy taking him to the mat but Shawn is back up for a standoff. Some armdrags set up an armbar on Kennedy before Shawn drives him knee first into the mat. The half crab goes on for a bit until Kennedy gets up and spears him through the ropes. Shawn barely beats the count back in and we take a break.

Back with Kennedy working on the leg for a change and kicking him in the face for two. Shawn gets tied in the Tree of Woe for some boot choking, followed by a superplex for two more. The seated abdominal stretch doesn’t last long as Shawn fights up and hits the flying forearm. Shawn misses the top rope elbow though and Kennedy grabs a rollup for two. The pinfall reversal sequence gets a bunch of near falls but the superkick misses, allowing Kennedy to grab the Mic Check for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty good here with Kennedy working over the back for most of the back and avoiding the elbow to hurt it even further. Shawn was desperate and Kennedy capitalized on the missed superkick to get the win. I don’t buy Kennedy being anything important anytime in the near future, but he did well enough here.

HHH isn’t happy with having to fight Ric Flair tonight but he’ll give it his all. Vince McMahon, with William Regal, comes in to gloat. Regal throws in a bonus: if HHH loses, he’s not in the Royal Rumble. Well that makes things more interesting.

Big Dick Johnson and Jillian Hall dance/sing in the New Year, setting up a Ron Simmons cameo.

William Regal is in Vince McMahon’s office when Vince gets a phone call from someone from USA. With that seemingly meaningless, Vince wants Regal to prove himself tonight in a match with Hornswoggle. Regal would be happy to show him some tough love. Oh and don’t worry about Finlay because he’s in Northern Ireland. Regal was looking a bit rough here.

We look at Jim Duggan winning the first Royal Rumble.

Royal Rumble Qualifying Match: Jim Duggan vs. Umaga

Duggan fires off right hands to start and gets knocked down with a single shot. The running hip attack connects in the corner, which draws blood from Duggan’s mouth. Umaga Samoan Spikes him for the easy win.

Ric Flair is talking to Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes when Vince McMahon comes in. Vince gets straight to the point: it’s over for Flair tonight, and there is no more limousine riding or kiss stealing.

Here is JBL for his Raw debut, so yes we do get balloons falling from the ceiling. We also get A LOT of pyro before JBL talks about how great it is that he is here, even if he doesn’t need to be here. He is here because he likes power and crushing people under his thumb. If he can’t buy it then he will take it, but here is Chris Jericho for the brawl. Referees and agents break it up (with commentary laying out for added effect).

In the back, JBL, with a bloody nose, yells at the agents and makes various threats.

Women’s Title: Melina vs. Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth is defending and gets kicked in the face by Mickie, setting up an early Thesz press. Melina comes in for a cheap shot and gets two on Mickie, which doesn’t set well with Beth. A double enziguri drops Beth but Mickie neckbreakers Melina for two. Back up and Melina breaks up a hurricanrana to Beth but gets dropkicked in the face for her efforts. A rollup gives the challengers a near fall each and a double dropkick sends Beth outside. The MickieDT plants Melina but Beth throws Mickie outside and fisherman’s busters Melina to retain.

Rating: C. They were getting in as much as they could here but you can only get so far in four minutes with three people involved. It was about trying to get a pin as fast as you can and that was only going to work for so long. These three could have a good match, but they were handcuffed by the time here in a big way.

William Regal vs. Hornswoggle

Vince McMahon is here with Regal and gives Hornswoggle a pre-match hug. Regal is in street clothes and backs Hornswoggle into the corner with as much trouble as you would expect. The big left hand is loaded up….but Regal can’t do it. Vince gets on the apron for some glaring and orders Regal to do it, allowing Hornswoggle to get in a cheap shot. Regal again loads up the left hand but won’t do it. Vince even throws in the brass knuckles but Regal still doesn’t hit him. That’s enough for Vince who comes in to slap him in the face and say Regal failed the test. We’ll call it a no contest somewhere around here.

Post match Vince tells Regal to get out of here and asks what happened to him. Regal leaves and looks disgusted (as only he can).

We look back at Jeff Hardy taking out Randy Orton earlier tonight.

Jeff Hardy vs. Santino Marella

Non-title and Santino has Maria and Carlito with him. Santino starts fast and gets in a few shots in the corner but Jeff is right back with a sling shot dropkick. Cue Randy Orton on the screen though, where he kicks Matt Hardy where his missing appendix used to be. And in the head too (as Roddy Piper once said to Gorilla Monsoon).

HHH wishes Ric Flair luck, but implies that the match is a foregone conclusion. Flair doesn’t like that, but says they’ll always be friends because HHH is what Flair was 20 years ago. HHH isn’t the man until he finishes Flair, even if they’ll always be friends. For one night though, Flair is going to be the man again. HHH: “You be the man and I’ll beat the man.” Good line.

HHH vs. Ric Flair

HHH’s Royal Rumble spot vs. Flair’s career. Flair WOO’s to start and the fans seem to like him here. A early takedown lets Flair strut and HHH is starting to look a bit more serious. The right hands vs. chops battle goes to Flair so HHH knees him down. Flair fights out of the corner though so it’s a facebuster to take him down for two.

There’s a neckbreaker for two and a spinebuster makes it even worse for Flair. The Pedigree is countered into a backslide for two so HHH is right back up with the sleeper. A suplex gets Flair out of trouble and a butterfly suplex drops HHH again. Flair goes up and actually manages to hit a high crossbody (in a Starrcade callback) before starting in on HHH’s knees.

The Figure Four is broken up though as HHH kicks him into the corner but the knees are still banged up. Now the Figure Four goes on and Flair even drags it back to the middle. The second attempt at the rope works a bit better and HHH hits the Pedigree, only to bang up his knees again. Cue William Regal to hit Flair with the brass knuckles for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This could only be so good as they didn’t hate each other and Flair can’t get to that level anymore. The match was more about giving Flair one last hurrah in Greensboro and that was just fine, as it is one of those important towns for him. It was even a pretty good match, but they had some heavy limitations.

Overall Rating: C+. You can feel the build to the Royal Rumble starting up and that is a great thing to see. It makes things feel that much more important as it means Wrestlemania is on the (very distant) horizon and everything gets cranked up. This includes Jeff Hardy, who has a rocket on his back right now and I’m looking forward to seeing him every week. Good show here, and the road to the Royal Rumble is on, meaning things should keep going up

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: December 17, 2007
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past Armageddon now and the big Raw story was JBL getting physical for the first time in a long while as he cost Chris Jericho the World Title. That means Randy Orton needs a new challenger and that is exactly what he has in the form of Jeff Hardy. The Royal Rumble is coming up, but so is the end of the year so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Vince McMahon getting beaten up at the Raw 15th Anniversary in a pretty cool moment.

Opening sequence.

Melina/Jillian Hall/Victoria/Layla vs. Mickie James/Michelle McCool/Kelly Kelly/Maria

Santa’s Little Helper match. Jillian tries to sing but gets cut off by the other team’s entrance and we’re ready to go. Maria flips Jillian down to start and it’s Michelle coming in to clean house. A bunch of hiptosses put the villains down before Kelly comes in. That doesn’t go so well as Victoria and Melina double team her down in the corner. Kelly is out in a hurry and brings in Mickie, with the MickieDT finishing Victoria in a hurry.

Rating: D. What are you expecting here? It’s a bunch of women in their festive outfits, which were the stars of the match. There was no story or structure to the match and they were probably told the winner and nothing more. It did its job well enough, but that had nothing to do with having a match.

Post match the winners clear the ring but here is a very shaken looking Vince McMahon to tell them to get out. Vince talks about how last week was supposed to be a celebration of his greatest creation but he was left laying and covered in beer while everyone else celebrated. What he doesn’t understand is how all of these people were so happy to see it.

Cue Jeff Hardy (there’s a pair you don’t see very often) to say that next week they’re going to Iraq. Jeff says that the people celebrated when Saddam Hussein was killed because he was crazed with power. Does that sound familiar? Vince gets the point…and sits down in the corner to cry as we take a break.

Back with William Regal and a referee trying to get Vince to leave but here is HHH instead. HHH calls Regal Liberace and says he’s the closest thing Vince has left to family. Vince cries even more so HHH sits next to him and apologizes for everything that happened last week (which he lists off). HHH: “Now get out of the ring before they cancel the show.”

Regal isn’t having this so he threatens….to have security throw HHH out. Vince forces himself to his feet and tells Regal to get Coach, but no security. Tonight it’s Regal/Coach vs. HHH and Vince hopes something bad happens to everyone. Then he cries some more. Weird Vince can be entertaining Vince and that was the case here.

HHH vs. William Regal/Jonathan Coachman

Everyone is in street clothes for a unique look. A single right hand drops Coach and HHH slugs away on Regal. The numbers game gets the better of things though and HHH gets sent into the post. Then a kick to the head drives it into the post again and Coach gets two. That’s enough for HHH as the comeback is on with right hands all around, plus a facebuster to Regal. The brass knuckles are cut off with a spinebuster to Regal and HHH picks up the knuckles. Coach gets poked in the head with said knuckles, setting up the Pedigree for the easy pin.

Rating: C-. What else is there to say about something like this? It was a quick workout for HHH, who isn’t going to lose often and especially not to these two. Vince losing his marbles is a good sign and if he sends these two do bumble through his bidding, it could be a lot of fun. For now though, HHH got to beat them up and he knows how to do that very well.

We recap JBL costing Chris Jericho the Raw World Title last night.

Tag Team Titles: Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Holly and Rhodes are defending after winning the titles from Cade and Murdoch last week. Cade drives Rhodes into the corner to start but it’s quickly off to Holly to chop Murdoch against the ropes. An atomic drop, with Cade adding a running big boot, cuts that off and an assisted legdrop gives Murdoch two. The dropkick gets Holly out of trouble though and it’s back to Rhodes as everything breaks down. Rhodes DDTs Cade to retain the titles. Well that was brisk.

Here is Ric Flair for a chat before his latest career threatening match. Flair reiterates that he will NEVER retire, even though Vince McMahon said the next time he loses, he will never wrestle again. Apparently Vince doesn’t want to see him get hurt but Flair has been doing this for thirty five years and he has loved doing all of this. Flair has sacrificed everything to be here and he isn’t about to throw it away.

He has traveled the roads for thirty years and we hear about a lot of them (Dusty Rhodes, Arn Anderson, Ricky Steamboat etc), plus some of the new friends he has made (Batista, Undertaker, HHH, Shawn Michaels etc). Now he has to be the Nature Boy and he respects everyone in that locker room. Tonight it’s another journey because he has Umaga but he is giving it all he has. He wants the best from whoever beats him and isn’t losing without the fight of his life. If he loses tonight, thank you. Rather nice speech there, as Flair knows how to bring the emotion.

Ric Flair vs. Umaga

Flair strikes away to start to the same amount of avail that you would expect. Umaga shoves him down without much trouble and grabs an early nerve hold. Back up and a clothesline drops Flair again, setting up a belly to belly for two. Some cannonballs down onto the chest keep Flair down and we’re right back to the nerve hold.

Umaga misses the middle rope headbutt though and now Flair’s chops work a bit better. The chop block doesn’t do much though and Umaga knocks him outside. The big running charge misses though and Umaga crashes through the barricade, allowing Flair to beat the count back in and survive.

Rating: C-. That’s how this should have gone, as Umaga was squashing Flair until he managed to escape rather than win. Flair shouldn’t be able to beat someone like Umaga at this point and they didn’t bother trying to do anything else. That kind of emotional trip is something Flair can sell as he knows how to do as well as anyone. Not a great match, but a properly told story.

Flair: “One more thing: WOO!”

Here is Chris Jericho to call out JBL. He should be happy with what he did last night because he beat Randy Orton, but it was by DQ. We see a clip of JBL interfering to cost Jericho the title and he wants an explanation. JBL isn’t here tonight, so Jericho will be heading to Smackdown to get some answers in person.

Cue JBL on the Titantron to say he’s too busy to be in a place like Buffalo. Jericho is low on JBL’s list of priorities and he blames Jericho for causing his own problems. Apparently this means Jericho being sent into JBL last night, which sends Jericho into a rant about how everyone is knocked over out here. Timekeeper Mark Yeaton got superkicked last week but he didn’t storm the ring. JBL: “MARK YEATON NEEDS AN APPOINTMENT TO TALK TO MY DOORMAN!”

Jericho promises to be at Smackdown but JBL warns him that a deal will be made to prevent that. JBL knew this would happen and talked to Vince McMahon, saying that if Jericho goes after him again, there is no Royal Rumble and no future title shot. That makes Jericho think that JBL has lost his killer instinct and is now listed with the talk show hosts and broadcasters. That’s too far for JBL, who is coming to Raw next week because he is a wrestling god. Seems to work for Jericho.

Santino Marella/Carlito vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Maria is here with Santino and Carlito. Hold on though as Carlito and Santino aren’t sure who should start because they’re new at this teaming together thing. Kendrick takes over on Santino’s arm to start and hands it off to London to stay on that arm. London’s running dropkick puts Santino down again so it’s off to Carlito to try his luck. A high crossbody takes Carlito down but Santino offers a distraction. That’s enough for a Backstabber to finish London for quite the upset.

Post match Santino thinks Carlito is Colombian and makes a spitting joke as the new team doesn’t seem to be the greatest idea.

Randy Orton says he did exactly what he promised to do last night by beating up Chris Jericho. Now he is ready for Jeff Hardy at the Royal Rumble.

HHH congratulates Ric Flair on his win. They’re both rather happy but here is wacky Vince McMahon to say HHH can face Flair in a career threatening match in two weeks.

Jeff Hardy/Shawn Michaels vs. Mr. Kennedy/Randy Orton

Orton runs Hardy over to start but Hardy kicks him away for a standoff. Kennedy comes in to knock him into the corner, only to get knocked down for the legdrop between the legs. A crossbody hits Kennedy and everything breaks down with the good guys hitting stereo dives to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Hardy missing Whisper in the Wind to put him in trouble for a change. Orton stomps away before handing it right back to Kennedy, who gets caught with a clothesline. It’s back to Shawn to clean a few rooms before Orton cheap shots him from the apron.

The chinlock goes on for a bit before Shawn is whipped hard into the corner for a crash to the floor. Back in and Orton starts the circle stomp before Kennedy grabs a camel clutch of all things. With that broken up, Shawn enziguris his way to freedom and falls into the corner for the tag to Hardy. The pace picks up (as it tends to do with Hardy) and everything breaks down (as it tends to do with main event tag matches). Hardy hits a Twist of Fate and a very fast Swanton to finish Orton for a statement win.

Rating: C+. This match was designed to do one thing and one thing only: make it clear that Hardy could win. Hardy is on a roll at the moment and all roads lead to the Royal Rumble, where Hardy might be able to pull off the miracle. The fans are behind him and he is racking up win after win, so why can’t he make something like this work? That seems to be the idea they are focusing on at the moment and that could wind up being great. Shawn and Kennedy were there too, but this was all about Hardy beating Orton.

Overall Rating: C. You could definitely tell this was a show where they were taking things a bit less seriously as it was a more lighthearted and easy week. The main event served a purpose, but the only other story that was treated seriously was Flair. Vince was being his over the top self and that tends to be more humorous than anything else, though it’s not like HHH beating up Coach is ever going to get old. Not the most interesting show, but an easy watch.

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Armageddon 2007
Date: December 16, 2007
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles, Taz

It’s the final pay per view of the year and it’s more or less a one match show. While there is a Raw main event of Chris Jericho challenging Randy Orton for the Raw World Title, the real main event here is Smackdown World Champion Batista defending the Smackdown World Title against Undertaker and Edge in a triple threat match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks exactly like what you would expect from a show called Armageddon, with clips of the major matches included.

United States Title: MVP vs. Rey Mysterio

MVP is defending and gets his legs kicked out to start. A springboard armdrag sends MVP outside, where he asks for a twenty second time out. Instead he gets Rey hitting a running corkscrew dive for the next big knockdown. Back in and MVP drops him face first onto the top turnbuckle, setting up a running boot to the head for two.

We hit the arm trap chinlock, which is quickly switched into an armbar for a rather meaningful change of pace. Rey tries to fight up and is pulled back down by the head for a clever counter. A fireman’s carry doesn’t work as well for MVP as Rey slips out and grabs a hurricanrana, followed by a springboard seated senton.

MVP is right back up with a shot to the face before going up top and….trying to superplex Rey to the floor. Since that is not very recommended, it’s a slugout on top instead until a super hurricanrana gets two on MVP. With nothing else working, MVP boots him in the face but has to duck a quick 619 attempt. That means Rey can hit the running hurricanrana off the apron, which is enough for MVP to take the countout.

Rating: C+. Nice enough opener here though the ending hurt it a good bit. You can only get so much out of a match that gets some time and then goes nowhere because the champion walks out to save the title. They didn’t have the title change to open things up but at least Rey was able to keep the fans hot.

Post match Rey gives MVP a 619 to blow off some steam.

We look at HHH and Jeff Hardy working together at Survivor Series.

Hardy knows what he has to do and it’s time for him to win a big match. He doesn’t believe in never.

Kane/CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V/Mark Henry

Matt Striker is here with the monsters. Henry shoves Punk around to start and it’s time to think of a new strategy. Punk tries striking away at the leg and gets thrown down again. That’s enough for Punk who brings Kane in to slug away at Henry for some more success. Punk comes back in but gets taken into the wrong corner for the big chop from V. A nasty gorilla press drop puts Punk down again and it’s back to Henry for some more clubbering.

Punk manages to duck a shot though and Kane comes back in for some uppercuts. V’s chokebomb gets two and it’s time to mount Kane, which has to be something that Vince finds hilarious. Thankfully there is no thrusting and Henry slaps on a bearhug. For some reason that doesn’t last long and it’s V coming back in for a clothesline. Kane manages to knock Henry down though and the tag brings in Punk for not the strongest reaction. Everything breaks down and Punk tries the springboard clothesline, which is countered into a Samoan drop to give V the pin.

Rating: C-. This felt like a big time ECW main event so they couldn’t have done much better. What matters here is having V (or Henry as it could have been either) get the pin to set up Punk’s next challenger. You can only have him run from the two of them for so long before it stops mattering and now V should be in line for the next title shot. Or to eat Punk, whichever comes first.

Vickie Guerrero has a victory celebration ready for Edge and says her pain and mental suffering will go away when he wins the title. A kiss for good luck ensues. On the hand that is.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Shawn Michaels

Before the match, Kennedy promises to hurt Shawn. They start fast with an exchange of shots to the face before Shawn goes to the leg to cut him down. Shawn can’t grab a suplex so he takes Kennedy down by the arm instead. We hit the Fujiwara armbar before Shawn goes a little more simple with a hammerlock. Kennedy can’t get out of the armbar so he drives Shawn through the ropes for a crash (and the break) instead.

That works for Shawn, who drives the bar arm into the steps and then stomps away on it back inside. They head to the apron for a breather but this time Kennedy sends him back first into the post to take over. There’s a whip into the corner to set up a running boot and a backbreaker keeps Shawn in trouble. Kennedy goes up but stops himself diving into a raised boot, instead dropping an elbow to the back for two.

The chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back goes on but Shawn fights up again. This time it’s an elbow to the face and a backdrop to send Kennedy outside. Back in and it’s the flying forearm into the nip up to start Shawn’s real comeback. The top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music but Kennedy reverses into a rollup for two. Kennedy sends him into the corner and the Regal Roll connects for two more. The Mic Check is blocked so Kennedy hits him so hard that he hurts his own hand. That’s all Shawn needs to hit the superkick for the pin.

Rating: B-. It wasn’t quite the best that Shawn is capable of doing but even just ok Shawn is still better than almost anyone else is going to be able to do. Kennedy losing is a bit of a surprise, but it isn’t like WWE is going to trust him so soon after multiple missed chances anyway. As usual, Shawn can bring someone up his level though and it worked out well here.

Randy Orton isn’t worried about who he is facing at the Royal Rumble, because he is going to destroy the virus that is Chris Jericho tonight. Orton has taken out all kinds of World Champions so please, don’t save us, but spare us.

Jeff Hardy vs. HHH

Non-title and the winner gets a shot at the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble. The lockup goes to HHH to start as Hardy is shoved down without much trouble. Some shoulders drop hardy again and there’s a clothesline to make it worse. A few armdrags work better for Hardy but they head outside where HHH knocks him down again.

Back in and HHH hits a heck of a slap, which seems to wake Hardy up a bit. It wakes him up enough that he can hit an atomic drop into the basement dropkick for two, which might not have been the best idea. They head outside where HHH whips him hard into the steps, meaning it’s time to drop elbows on Hardy’s back.

Hardy gets an elbow up in the corner and goes up, only to be shoved down for the big crash into the barricade as HHH continues to be smarter/one step ahead. Back in and HHH drops another elbow for two before grabbing the abdominal stretch to stay on the ribs. Hardy slips out of a suplex and hits the enziguri, followed by a dropkick. Some running forearms put HHH down but he rolls away from the slingshot dropkick in the corner.

Hardy is fine enough to knock him outside and of course that means the slingshot dive. Back in and the Whisper in the Wind gets two but the Twist of Fate is countered into a DDT to give HHH his own two. HHH unloads in the corner but gets mule kicked into another corner, setting up the slingshot dropkick. The Swanton misses for a crash though and HHH hits the spinebuster. The Pedigree is loaded up but Hardy reverses into a rollup for the surprise pin and the title shot.

Rating: B. This was the kind of match where you could see the story they were telling throughout. HHH is the Cerebral Assassin but Hardy is more about making it up as you go, meaning HHH was going to get frustrated and ultimately caught in the end. That’s good, logical storytelling and Hardy gets the biggest singles win of his career.

Great Khali is ready to destroy Finlay for saving Hornswoggle at Survivor Series. Tonight, Khali decimates both of them.

Great Khali vs. Finlay

Runjin Singh and Hornswoggle are here too. Khali starts fast with a chop and big boot to send Finlay outside early. Another chop only hits post but Khali tries it again to knock him down. Back in and we hit the nerve hold, followed by a kick to the face to put Finlay down again. Finlay fights out of another nerve hold and grabs the rope, drawing in Hornswoggle to…get tossed down with ease. Finlay grabs the Shillelagh but gets it taken away, allowing Hornswoggle to come in with another Shillelagh for a low blow. One heck of a Shillelagh shot knocks Khali cold to give Finlay the pin.

Rating: D. Just in case Khali hadn’t been damaged enough, he loses here again, albeit to someone who has become one of the stronger midcard stars on Smackdown. Finlay standing up for Hornswoggle is something anyone can get behind because he’s taking care of someone who can’t do it for themselves. Turning Finlay into a good guy is hard enough but they are making it work fairly well here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Randy Orton. Jericho came back and wanted a title shot to save WWE from Orton, so here we go.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is challenging and starts fast by dropping him ribs first across the top rope. A spinwheel kick puts Orton on the apron but he’s too smart for the triangle dropkick. Instead he drops to the floor so Jericho can hit a big dive as this is one sided so far. Back in and Jericho slips out of the hanging DDT but can’t get the Walls. Orton is right back with a DDT for two and the slow stomping begins.

We’re already in the chinlock for a bit before Jericho fights back up with a clothesline. Jericho walks into a powerslam though and Orton sends him shoulder first into the post. There’s the required superplex for two but Orton misses the dropkick, allowing Jericho to hit an enziguri.

The Lionsault hits knees though and Orton grabs that backbreaker of his. The RKO is blocked though and Jericho gets in a quick Lionsault for two more. Orton takes it outside and whips him into JBL on commentary, which doesn’t sit well with the cowboy hatted one. Back in and the Codebreaker is blocked but the Punt is countered into the Walls….so JBL comes in to kick Jericho in the head for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Not a great match but the ending was a smart enough way out of this. You don’t want to beat Jericho but Orton hasn’t been champion long enough. Letting JBL get physical again should open enough doors to make for some interesting options. They were trying to get into a higher gear near the end, though I never quite bought that the title was in danger.

Post match Orton hits an RKO for a bonus.

Before the Women’s Title match, here is Jillian Hall to badly sing Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas. Yeah it’s a deal they do all the time, but at least they have something to promote with her (and it’s kind of working).

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Mickie James

Phoenix is defending and powers Mickie around to start as you might have expected. Some knees to the back have Mickie in more trouble and we hit the quickly broken dragon sleeper. Back up and Mickie flips over her out of the corner, only to get caught in a double chickenwing. That’s broken up and a hurricanrana out of the corner gives Mickie a break, setting up a basement dropkick. The MickieDT is countered into a fisherman’s buster to retain the title.

Rating: C-. They had almost no time out here and there was only so much that they could do. It was basically get in, get out and do your thing without burning up time for the big matches and that is pretty limiting. They were working hard while they could and the match didn’t have any problems, but Beth isn’t losing the title in a match that doesn’t even get five minutes on pay per view.

We recap Batista vs. Edge vs. Undertaker for the Smackdown World Title. Batista FINALLY beat Undertaker to get the monkey off of his back but then Edge returned and got involved, attacking both of them in the process. It turns out that Edge is in cahoots (and perhaps more) with General Manager Vickie Guerrero, who got him back in the title picture. Triple threat time.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker vs. Batista

Batista is defending. Edge drops straight to the floor to start, leaving Batista and Undertaker to slug it out in various places. As Edge looks on, Batista kicks Undertaker in the face and gets glared at for his troubles. Edge finally gets involved by posting Undertaker and knocking Batista down on the floor.

Back in and Batista hits a swinging Boss Man Slam, followed by the driving shoulders in the corner. Undertaker breaks up the powerslam and loads up the apron legdrop but Batista cuts him off with a clothesline. Batista plants Edge again but gets pulled outside again, leaving Undertaker to hit Snake Eyes into the big boot on Edge. That leaves Batista to get pulled into Hell’s Gate….and Edge rings the bell in a clever way out.

Edge comes back in to spear Undertaker for two and grabs some chairs to make it worse. Batista breaks up the Conchairto by kicking Edge in the face and pulls Old School into a spinebuster. There’s a spear to Edge to send him outside…..where another Edge pops out from underneath the ring. Undertaker chokeslams the other Edge (not clear if he knows the difference or not) but has to counter the Batista Bomb. The Tombstone hits Batista but Edge is back in with a chair shot to Undertaker and steals the pin and the title.

Rating: B. The ending was a little weird as the other Edge was never identified or really shown on his own, but they had to put the title back on Edge here, just for the sake of changing things up a bit. Edge and Vickie are the top villains on the show and Batista vs. Undertaker has been done to death. Let someone fresh get in there, especially since Edge never lost the title in the first place. They kept things moving fast enough here and the match didn’t overstay its welcome, with enough action to make it a fun match with the right ending.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s enough good stuff on here to make the show good, but the weaker parts really did make it clear that this was a low level pay per view. The main event and Hardy vs. HHH were both good, but you can tell that things need to pick up on the way to the Royal Rumble. It’s nice that things are wrapping up here though, because the road here hasn’t been the most interesting.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam 2005
Date: August 21, 2005
Location: MCI Center, Washington DC.
Attendance: 18,156
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s a big show here with a card that doesn’t quite live up to the hype. We have a huge main event between Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels, but after that it’s kind of a downgrade with Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero with a kid (symbolically) above the ring. The World Title matches see John Cena defending against Chris Jericho and JBL challenging Batista in a No Holds Barred match. Maybe they can make it work though so let’s get to it.

Lilian Garcia sings the Star Spangled Banner.

The opening video looks at the big matches, which works a bit better. Granted that might be because it’s set to Remedy by Seether and I always liked that song. Shawn vs. Hogan gets its own section of the video, because nothing on this show comes close to it (fair enough).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan

Jordan is defending and it’s a German suplex into the Crossface to make Benoit champion in 25 seconds. Now THAT is how you wake a crowd up while giving Jordan exactly what he deserved in Honky Tonk Man style.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Eddie and asks him to calm down. This isn’t about Dominic because it’s all about Eddie not being able to beat Rey. Eddie wants someone to carry on the Guerrero legacy and Vickie talks about him having a heart of gold. But there’s also an evil inside of him that won’t leave Rey alone. Eddie: “So now you don’t think I can beat Rey?” Eddie throws her out and reassures himself that he’ll win.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. Edge. Lita left Matt for Edge while Matt was hurt and then he was released. Matt invaded Raw a few times to get at Edge but then he was rehired and it was just Matt Hardy again. Tonight is the big fight.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Hardy runs to the ring and starts the fight on the floor as it feels like Matt wants to kill him. They get inside with Matt hammering away and a loud HARDY chant. Matt grabs a rear naked choke but Edge gets to the ropes and then back outside. Back in and Edge hits a headbutt to put Matt on the ropes as the fans are all over Lita.

A spear through the ropes puts them back on the floor but Matt hammers away with right hands to the head. More right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble so he drops Matt face first onto the post to knock him silly. Even Lita looks concerned as Matt is busted open. Matt can barely stand so Edge kicks him in the head….and the referee stops it.

Rating: D+. So yeah Matt comes back, gets in a few shots, and then gets busted open for a referee stoppage in five minutes. The first minute or so felt like a war but then it was little more than a hard hitting match with one big spot. This is the kind of thing that needed to go about eighteen minutes with both of them bleeding, but that would suggest that Matt was something important, rather than just a way to get Edge over. I can go with that as Matt is Matt and Edge has been a near main eventer for a long time now, but this was a major disappointment after the setup.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio. Eddie can’t beat Rey and has been driven completely crazy over jealousy and his failures. Therefore, Eddie is going to try something else so he brought up that Rey’s son Dominic was really Eddie’s biological son. Eddie wanted Dominic, but a social worker said they had to settle this, so a ladder match was made instead.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero

Tony Chimel: “The following contest is a ladder match for the custody of Dominic!” And that’s your most ridiculous ring introduction of all time. Dominic and the social worker are in the front row so Eddie goes over to them for a rather evil smile. Rey comes out and hugs Dominic so Eddie goes over and shakes the social worker’s hand. We’re ready to go and Eddie talks a lot of trash as they stare each other down to start.

Eddie gets in a cheap shot to knock Rey into the corner but Rey monkey flips him out to the floor. A whip sends Rey into the ladder though and he has to springboard in with a dropkick to knock Eddie off. Eddie goes to get another ladder so Rey dropkicks that one into his face, followed by a springboard seated senton to the floor. Back in and Eddie saves Rey’s climb with a sunset bomb but he can’t hold on, making it look rather messy. Eh to be fair that’s a pretty tricky spot.

Eddie hits him in the ribs and face with the ladder before sandwiching Rey between some ladders. The fans know what’s coming and are rather pleased with the slingshot hilo onto a ladder onto Rey onto another ladder. Rey gets up and uses a ladder to bridge his way up top to cut Eddie off, including a backdrop onto the bridged ladder. The crash bangs up Rey’s knee so he climbs rather slowly, allowing Eddie to dropkick the ladder out and hurt the knee even more.

Eddie reverse powerbombs him ribs first into the ladder on the top rope and there’s that evil smile again. That’s enough for another climb but Dominic comes in to shake the ladder. That just annoys Eddie so he yells at Dominic and demands a hug. Eddie: “I’m your new daddy now!” Eddie goes to hit him but Rey makes the save as Dominic is back with the social worker who let him jump the barricade and interfere in a violent match.

Rey sends him into a ladder and then 619s said ladder into Eddie’s face, only to hurt the knee again. The knee is ok enough to Drop The Dime onto a ladder onto Eddie and then load up the ladder again. Eddie climbs up the same side for an electric chair but Rey shows him how to do the sunset bomb for the huge crash. Rey goes up again and grabs the case but Eddie kicks the ladder out and pulls Rey down into a big spinebuster.

With Rey pinned under the ladder, Eddie goes up but stops to talk a lot of trash. He can’t unhook the thing anyway, allowing Rey to wiggle free and kick the ladder over. Apparently Vickie was supposed to run in there and missed the cue, explaining why Eddie couldn’t understand how a hook worked. Eddie is back up with Three Amigos, including the third onto the ladder. That means another climb but this time Vickie comes out for the save as she shoves the ladder over. Vickie pulls Eddie back so Rey can climb p and win.

Rating: B. It’s rather good with some big crashes, but the Vickie/Dominic stuff was too much and brought the match down. Rey vs. Eddie is something you can watch all day, especially if Eddie is all evil, but they could have come up with something better than a ladder match for custody papers. It was too far and became dumb rather than dramatic, which defeats a lot of the purpose.

Post match Vickie is relieved and Rey hits Eddie with a briefcase for a bonus.

Chris Jericho doesn’t like John Cena’s theme music and promises to make him as forgettable as the New Kids On The Block. He beat the Rock and Steve Austin on the same night and Cena isn’t on their level.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

For Eugene’s (Or Angle’s?) Gold Medal with no time limit and Christy Hemme is here with Eugene. Angle goes off on him to start and stomps Eugene down into the corner. Eugene comes back with a Faarooq spinebuster but Angle breaks up the People’s Elbow attempt with a hard clothesline. The fans are very pleased with this as they don’t seem all that into Eugene here.

Angle rolls the German suplexes for two and the fans are happy again. Eugene gets sent into the buckle a few times so the comeback is on, including a Rock Bottom for two. The Stunner gets the same and Eugene takes down the non-existent straps. Angle reverses the ankle lock by rolling him into the corner though and it’s the Angle Slam into the ankle lock for the win.

Rating: D. This could have been on Raw as Eugene was completely overwhelmed. The charm is long past gone now and it’s just Eugene doing Austin and Rock moves with almost nothing in between. It was just a squash anyway as Eugene is treated like the glorified jobber that he is. Angle needs to move on to something else and Eugene needs to become something else entirely.

Post match Angle stands on a chair so he can be awarded the medal again.

The Divas, in swimsuits, wash a limo with the Presidential seal on the door. The window goes down to reveal Vince McMahon. Vince: “Hey, why not?” There’s a McMahon For President bumper sticker on the limo for a bonus.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Rematch from Wrestlemania because Orton isn’t happy with his loss. It’s weird to see Undertaker come out first. Orton bails to the floor to start so Undertaker takes a second before shoving him down. A slap gets in Orton’s head a bit but he’s back up to dodge some right hands. Undertaker grabs a headlock (that’s a rare one) but Orton is right back with a hiptoss into a clothesline. That just earns him a big boot to the face and Orton is stunned in a hurry.

Undertaker goes technical with a keylock into Old School but Orton somehow understands what it means when Undertaker stands on the top while holding an arm. Old School is broken up with an armdrag back down but Undertaker LAUNCHES him into the corner to hammer away. The big boot and jumping clothesline give Undertaker two but the big boot in the corner only hits….well corner really and Orton grabs a DDT for his own two with Undertaker putting a foot across the rope.

Flashing back to his Evolution days, Orton cannonballs down onto the leg and then wraps it around the post. The leglock goes on so Undertaker punches his way to freedom, only to earn a knee drop to the ribs. Undertaker limps into the powerslam for two and it’s time to go to Texas with a spinning toehold.

That’s broken up as well and Undertaker starts kicking at Orton’s knee, earning a one off BORING chant. That doesn’t last long either as Orton is right back to the knee as the slow pace continues. Undertaker kicks him out to the floor for a ram into the steps and the apron legdrop as this isn’t exactly hitting a high gear. Old School connects back inside and it’s the Downward Spiral to Orton, who is right back with a dropkick for the double knockdown.

The RKO is blocked so they fight over a Tombstone until Orton gets two off the backbreaker. Orton goes up but Undertaker rolls through the high crossbody and grabs him by the throat. The chokeslam connects but a “fan” comes in. The distraction lets Orton hit the RKO for the fast pin.

Rating: C+. It was a struggle to get this high as there was no sense of urgency or any time until the end where either of them seemed close to going to a finish. At least the Wrestlemania match had an awesome near fall of the RKO but this was a bunch of leg work until they got to the finish. It could have worked if they had gone to a better ending but this never got into a higher gear.

And it’s Cowboy Bob Orton. You can book the rubber match already.

Some members of the Republican National Committee are here.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. John Cena. They’ve been having issues since Cena made his Raw debut on the Highlight Reel. Then they got in an argument over who was the bigger rock star, which turned into Cena’s Steve Austin vs. Eric Bischoff’s Vince McMahon with Jericho and Carlito as the chief lackeys. The former story was better but why do that when you can do the same thing you’ve done so many times before?

Bischoff wishes Jericho’s luck.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

Cena is defending. They go nose to nose to start and a lockup doesn’t go anywhere. Jericho’s headlock is just as ineffective but he grabs a suplex to take over. There’s the spinwheel kick to drop Cena again but the springboard crossbody only lands on the floor. Back in and Cena hammers away, only to charge into a dropkick in the corner. A suplex gives Jericho two and a basement dropkick to the headsets up the chinlock.

They go outside with Jericho choking away with a cord but Cena is back with right hands. This isn’t exactly blowing the roof off the place so far. The big flying shoulder misses though and Jericho hits the running bulldog. Jericho has to bail out of the Lionsault so he tries the Walls, which is kicked out to the floor in a hurry. Cena drops the middle rope Fameasser over the ropes for two on the way back in but the FU is countered into a DDT for two. It’s time to start in on the back with a backbreaker and some elbows as the fans are loudly split.

The running crotch attack to the back only hits ropes though and they’re both down again. Cena is back up with that hard clothesline into the ProtoBomb. The Shuffle is countered into the Walls in the middle though, sending Cena on the long crawl to the ropes. Jericho pulls him back in but Cena makes the rope on the second attempt to a rather loud reaction. Cena’s back is good enough to try a super AA but Jericho slips out and grabs another suplex for another two. An argument with the referee lets Cena grab the FU to retain.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they drew the crowd into it and it turned into a heck of a match by the end. Cena is showing some signs of brilliance in these big matches and Jericho has more than shown that he can hang with anyone so this was a benefit to both of them. Good match here as Cena is becoming a bigger and bigger star every single week.

We recap JBL vs. Batista (hometown boy) for the Smackdown World Title. JBL beat him by DQ last month so now it’s No Holds Barred. Not much more to it than that as JBL isn’t quite the believable challenger.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

Batista is defending and it’s No Holds Barred. We get the JBL dollars raining from the ceiling during JBL’s entrance. The fight starts at the entrance with Batista ramming him into various things. A fire extinguisher into the face drops Batista though and JBL punches him around the barricade, only to have Batista spear him through said barricade.

They get inside for the first time with JBL kicking him in the head, followed by some whipping with a belt. Back up and Batista charges into a boot in the corner, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for two. JBL slides in the steps and this isn’t going to end well. The powerbomb off the steps is countered into a backdrop off of them and Batista hits the spinebuster. There’s the Batista Bomb but Batista doesn’t cover. Another Batista Bomb onto the steps retains the title.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much but it was way better than their previous match as it didn’t go on forever, though the stipulation wasn’t exactly used. They went with the definitive ending here as Batista completely beat him, which is all it should have been. JBL was never a threat to Batista and now they can both move on to something else, with both of them going in the proper direction.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan. They teamed a handful of times and then Shawn superkicked him on the Fourth of July. Shawn said he had to know and the match was made. Everything went spiraling out of control after that though, with Shawn turning it into a weird near shoot on Hogan’s career while Hogan just referenced Bret Hart and screwjobs a few times. Shawn has carried this feud on his back and it’s going to be interesting to see how they get to the big boot and legdrop.

Hulk Hogan vs. Shawn Michaels

Hogan has the big flag out for the entrance. It’s a long staredown to start before Hogan shoves him away and shows off the biceps. Hogan shoves him down a few more times and Shawn is already frustrated. A headlock works a bit better for Shawn until a shoulder sends him into a backflip through the ropes as the overselling is already strong. Back in and Shawn knees him in the ribs but gets put on top so Hogan can kick him in the ribs.

Shawn bounces as high into the air as he can for a crotching, before a ram into the buckle gives us a bump that Mr. Perfect would think is too much. A clothesline puts Shawn on the floor where he rolls backwards again, gets up and falls back down. Shawn manages a kick to the face though and starts chopping away in the corner. The slap to the face does not go well so Shawn does it again before chopping even more. A third slap earns Shawn a right hand out to the floor but they both get posted with Hogan staggering around a lot.

Shawn posts him again but still can’t put Hogan down so it’s time for some left hands to the head. Some right hands in the corner get Shawn shoved down again (make it twice), only to have him finally punch Hogan down (you don’t see that too often). Hogan is finally busted open and Shawn grabs the sleeper to follow the Randy Savage formula from Wrestlemania V. Shawn’s arm is covered in blood as Hogan suplexes his way to freedom.

The forearm into the nipup lets Shawn drop the elbow (OH YEAH indeed) but this one misses (leave it to Savage kid). Hogan slugs away but Shawn tries another forearm, which takes out the referee. The fans want Bret (fair enough after the promos building this up) but Shawn is up first and heads to the top, only to come back down for a terrible Sharpshooter (even Rock’s is better than that).

Another referee comes in and Hogan very slowly makes it to the rope. Hogan kicks him into the second referee and everyone is down again. A low blow drops Hogan and a chair to the head finally lets Shawn hit the elbow. Sweet Chin Music connects for two but Hogan kicks out, Hulks Up, punches away and finishes with the big boot and legdrop. So that’s how they got there.

Rating: B-. The match was a weird one (YOU THINK?) as Shawn was doing his over the top selling and turning it into a joke at first but then it settled into a match with a pretty simple formula that hit the high points but didn’t exactly break the mold. Hogan was the definitive winner here and Shawn hit everything he could without being able to finish Hogan off. I liked it well enough and it’s certainly a dream match, but it’s two matches in one and that’s a little distracting.

Post match Hogan poses but Shawn stops him to make everything nice. Shawn says he had to know and, as usual, wrestlers are rather forgiving about the whole situation. It’s more posing to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place with some good wrestling and action but a lot of things that felt like they should have been so much more. It’s an enjoyable show and something I’d watch again down the line, but it felt like they were going for a stacked show and as it is, it’s just pretty good. Fix some of the bigger holes and it’s a great one, but I’ll take what I can get after a build that wasn’t their best work.

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