ECW On Sci Fi – June 5, 2007: Good Timing Makes Bad Time

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 5, 2007
Location: Amway Arena, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re done with One Night Stand and some ECW things actually took place on the show. First and foremost, Bobby Lashley got the ECW World Title back from Vince McMahon, which should wrap their feud up for good. Other than that, Rob Van Dam seems to be out of action for the time being after Randy Orton beat the living daylights out of him. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Lashley winning the handicap match to get the title back.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon, sitting in a rocking chair on a platform, with a rather annoyed glare on his face. Bobby Lashley comes out as Vince keeps rocking back and forth without doing much of anything.

Bobby Lashley vs. Tommy Dreamer/Sandman/Balls Mahoney

Non-title hardcore match. The trio grabs their weapons and start swinging to put Lashley on the floor. Back in and they do it again, followed by a third time for good measure. For some reason Dreamer thinks a suplex is a good idea and gets suplexed down for his efforts. Sandman and Mahoney drape Lashley over the top with Sandman dropping a leg to the back of the neck. Dreamer is back in for the baseball slide to the chair in the Tree of Woe. It’s table time (because of course) but Mahoney chairs Dreamer by mistake. That’s enough for Lashley to put Sandman through the table and spear Mahoney down for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can only get so much out of something like this as Lashley isn’t going to lose to three people so low on the totem pole. I guess this is the best punishment Vince can muster at the moment and while it wasn’t awful, it was spending a few minutes waiting around for Lashley to beat them up. Just find something better for Lashley to do already.

Post match, Lashley poses in front of Vince, who doesn’t move.

Kevin Thorn vs. Stevie Richards

Richards forearms away to start and sends Thorn outside. The dive off the apron is pulled out of the air though, allowing Thorn to drive him into the apron. Back in and the chinlock goes on until Richards fights up, only to be dropped face first onto the turnbuckle instead. Richards strikes away and sends Thorn throat first into the middle rope fir a change. A spinebuster cuts Richards off though and Original Sin is good for pin.

Rating: D. This was another boring one as Thorn isn’t all that interesting once he gets in the ring. The vampire deal is a cool idea but other than the finisher, he’s just another low level power guy. Richards was trying as always, but there wasn’t much anyone could do in these circumstances.

Extreme Expose, who mix it up this week by adding some dancing on the announcers’ table.

We look at Randy Orton injuring Rob Van Dam at One Night Stand, putting Van Dam on the shelf.

Elijah Burke/Marcus Cor Von vs. Major Brothers

Cor Von charges at them to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Brett starts working on the arm though and Brian comes in with a top rope ax handle. That doesn’t work so well so it’s off to Burke, who gets double hiptossed right back down. Cor Von isn’t having this though and comes back in to run both of them over.

A slam in the corner sets up Burke’s seated abdominal stretch, followed by Cor Von’s waistlock. Cor Von knees Brett in the ribs to cut off the comeback and Burke puts on a standing abdominal stretch. For some reason he lets that go though and knees Brett in the back, sending him over to the corner for the tag to Brian. The comeback doesn’t please Cor Von so he tags himself back in to hit the Pounce for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can definitely see something in the Major Brothers, as they feel like a team who know each other well. It also helps that they have gotten some TV time now and have a bit of familiarity with the fans. The New Breed is all but done at this point, but a win over the Majors isn’t going to hurt anyone at the moment.

We recap the opening match, including Vince McMahon almost looking like he was in a trance.

CM Punk vs. Matt Striker

Before the match, Striker promises to teach Punk a lesson to educate these people cheering for him. Punk leg lariats him down to start and a pair of kicks gets two more. Striker comes back with some suplexes and a slam, setting up the half crab. With that broken up, Striker hits a hanging swinging neckbreaker before going right back to the same hold. Punk escapes again and starts striking away, including the running knee in the corner. The bulldog sets up the GTS to give Punk the pin.

Rating: C-. There’s only so much you can get out of Striker, who much like Thorn, is a far better character that he is a wrestler. It also doesn’t help that Punk is one of the biggest stars on this show and isn’t losing to anyone but another big star. Striker put in the effort here, but it was only going to get him so far.

Overall Rating: D+. This was quite the lame duck show as we are less than a week away from the Draft so none of this really mattered all that much. Vince still being broken was the highlight, as he is still one of the best performers in the world. Things need to be shaken up around here so the Draft is coming at the right time, but it didn’t exactly make for a good show this week.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – May 15, 2007: Replays And Glaring

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: May 15, 2007
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Judgment Day and Bobby Lashley is still chasing Vince McMahon and the ECW World Title. That has been a well done story so far and we could be in for even more of the same going forward, as the whole thing seems to have some legs, just because of how gleeful Vince seems to be as champion. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Bobby Lashley getting beaten down by Umaga and the McMahons last night on Raw.

Vince McMahon joins us from WWE headquarters and talks about how much of a fashion statement his doorag really is. He blames Bobby Lashley for needing it and Lashley must like seeing him in it. Well Vince likes what he saw happen to Lashley last night, which is why tonight it’s Lashley vs. the New Breed in another handicap match. That’s just a preview for Sunday though, where Vince will retain the title. Vince is just perfect in this role.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Snitsky

Snitsky throws him down to start and stomps away, setting up some elbows for two. A suplex gets the same and Snitsky forearms away at the chest. Snitsky mixes things up a bit with a double underhook arm crank but Van Dam fights out and kicks away. The spinwheel kick and windmill kick drop Snitsky but Rolling Thunder misses. Instead Snitsky gets crotched on top off a missed boot and gets kicked outside. That’s fine with Snitsky, who blasts him with a clothesline before adding a chair shot for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Snitsky had the right look to be a monster and could do a good enough power match, so this was about as good as he was going to do. Van Dam has fallen pretty hard in the last few months and I’m not sure how much higher you can expect him to get at the moment. A win in a rematch over Snitsky might help, but I’m not sure if there is a magic formula for him around here.

Video on CM Punk.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Punk has heavily taped ribs and strikes away to start but gets slowed down by the injury. Richards is smart enough to go after the ribs and try to rip off the tape, which only earns him more kicks to the ribs. The bow and arrow stays on the ribs and Richards gets creative with a jumping double stomp. An abdominal stretch doesn’t last long but Richards misses a charge in the corner. Punk’s neckbreaker out of the corner gets two but Richards hits a running dropkick. Punk has finally had it though and reverses a tornado DDT into the GTS for the pin.

Rating: C. This was a short match but they did it about as well as they could have. Richards didn’t do anything outside of the logical path by working on Punk’s injured ribs but he mixed it up a bit tp keep things fresh. Rather nice match here all things considered and I would not have bet on that.

Elijah Burke fires up the rest of the New Breed, who don’t seem entirely convinced at his leadership.

Kevin Thorn vs. Nunzio

Ariel is here with Thorn, who powers him into the corner to start as the smoke from Thorn’s entrance has to clear out. Nunzio’s jawbreaker doesn’t get him anywhere as he hits a spinning jackknife out of the corner (that looked good) and hits some crossface forearms. Nunzio swings away to no avail as the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up but Thorn gets some boots up in the corner. The Dark Kiss finishes Nunzio in a hurry.

Rating: D+. Nothing match here, as you might have guessed, but the interesting thing here is that Nunzio was replacing Sabu. It turns out that Sabu wasn’t interested in losing to Thorn and was fired as a result. That is probably the best for everyone involved, as Sabu never fit in WWE and it isn’t like he was doing anything important at the moment.

Weekly Condemned material.

Extreme Expose.

Here’s the same video package that opened the show.

Bobby Lashley promises to end Vince McMahon on Sunday and get the ECW World Title back.

Judgment Day rundown.

Bobby Lashley vs. New Breed

Before the match, Elijah Burke praises Marcus Cor Von and says they’re getting there with Matt Striker. Burke starts going over his own resume but Striker handles the end of the introduction for him (while giving the fans an F for their lame effort). Cor Von likes Burke too and now it’s time to go. Burke starts for the team and is powered into the corner in a hurry. The delayed vertical suplex keeps Burke in trouble so it’s off to Cor Von for the power showdown.

Lashley leapfrogs Cor Von and elbows him in the face, which somehow makes Striker tag himself in. That means Striker can get a beating of his own but Cor Von sneaks in with the Pounce to send Lashley outside. The villains start taking turns on Lashley, who finally fights out of Cor Von’s chinlock. The comeback doesn’t last long as Cor Von knocks him down again, setting up the seated abdominal stretch. Lashley fights up again and starts pummeling Striker, including the spear for the pin as Burke and Cor Von watch from ringside.

Rating: C-. Another match where they didn’t have a lot of options and even the logical way to go was only so good. Lashley has been built up about as much as he can for a match like he has coming up so this was just the last thing he did rather than any major push. New Breed continues to fall apart, and that is a good thing as the team is ready to go on their separate ways.

Replays and glaring wrap up the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one and that isn’t a big surprise. It was pretty clear that Lashley vs. McMahon is the only real story on the show, so what else were they supposed to do for the rest of the hour? ECW does not have a lot of depth when it comes to stories. The matches themselves haven’t been much either, leaving this as a not very surprising lackluster effort.

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – April 10, 2007: Decisions, Decisions

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: April 10, 2007
Location: Dunkin’ Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Things have picked up again around here as the New Breed beat the ECW Originals in a heck of an Extreme Rules match last week to even the series. I’m sure a third match is coming and CM Punk is lurking around the story as well. On the higher end, Bobby Lashley is going to have to defend the ECW World Title against Vince and Shane McMahon and Umaga in what I’m sure will be a technical masterpiece. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon, again in a snappy hat, to open things up. Vince talks about how humiliating Wrestlemania was for him and we get a quick recap of his newfound bald. Now it is time for revenge and since Steve Austin and Donald Trump are gone, Bobby Lashley is all that is left. Vince wants revenge, so Lashley is suspended from the arena tonight. Granted it wouldn’t have mattered, as Lashley suffered a severe concussion last night.

We see how said concussion took place, with the McMahons and Umaga destroying Lashley on Raw. Vince promises to take the ECW World Title at Backlash because he could make a rather nice champion himself. Before we get there though, Vince is going to ruin Lashley’s life, but he is going to do the same thing to the fans for laughing at him. Details coming later.

CM Punk is warming up when Rob Van Dam comes in to say that Punk should be an ECW Original. As I wonder if Van Dam knows what “original” means, Elijah Burke comes in to say Punk is joining the New Breed next week. Punk is sick of this and he’s making his decision tonight.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn

Ariel is here with Thorn. Dreamer hammers away to start but gets knocked down, only to avoid a legdrop. They head outside with Dreamer sending him into the steps but getting pulled down off the apron. Back in and Thorn grabs his sitout spinebuster for two but Dreamer grabs a neckbreaker, which Tazz thinks could hurt Thorn’s neck. Dreamer’s spinebuster gets two but an Ariel distraction lets Thorn crotch him on top. The Dark Kiss finishes Dreamer in a hurry.

Rating: D+. Short match here with Dreamer getting in his usual assortment of right hands with a few moves thrown in as well. The New Breed continues to win more often than not and Dreamer is the kind of person to make them look better. Dreamer doesn’t need to ever win another match and he is going to stay over so let him keep doing his thing like this.

Snitsky interrupts Extreme Expose getting ready. The women run.

The Condemned is still a thing.

Hardcore Holly needs surgery after Snitsky wrecked his arm last week.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Rematch from last week where Punk beat him up pretty badly. Matt Striker comes out to watch for a bonus, so here is Sandman to even things out. We’re joined in progress with Punk hitting a butterfly backbreaker for two as Sandman and Striker both seem pleased. Punk misses a springboard crossbody though and Richards knees him in the ribs for two. That doesn’t last long as Punk kicks him in the face and hits the running knee in the corner. The ensuing bulldog gets two but Sandman’s Singapore cane shot hits Striker by mistake. Richards’ rollup gets two but Punk reverses into one of his own for the fast pin.

Post match Sandman tries to make peace but Punk doesn’t seem impressed. Punk? Holding a grudge?

Extreme Expose, but Snitsky interrupts again. This time Layla can’t run away and cowers against the ropes. Balls Mahoney tries to make the save and it goes as you would expect.

We recap CM Punk saying he would make his decision tonight. This comes after commentary said Punk would be making his decision tonight, turning this into one of the most pointless videos you’ll see in WWE in recent memory.

Rob Van Dam vs. Marcus Cor Von

Sabu, in a neck brace, is here with Van Dam and Elijah Burke (no neck brace) is here with Cor Von. Feeling out process to start with Van Dam trying to figure out how to deal with Cor Von’s power. Cor Von hammers him down in the corner and hits some knees to the ribs. We hit something like a seated abdominal stretch, setting up a Regal Cutter for two on Van Dam. A belly to back suplex drops Van Dam again as this is one sided so far.

The chinlock with a knee in the back makes things worse for Van Dam and there’s a release German suplex for two. We hit the regular chinlock until Van Dam fights up but Cor Von cuts off the kicks. The chinlock goes on again but this time the comeback works a lot better. A kick to the face puts Cor Von down and a running….double leg takedown (Huh?) sets up the spinning legdrop. The top rope kick to the face drops Cor Von but Burke goes after Sabu. That’s enough of a distraction for Cor Von to Pounce Van Dam for the pin.

Rating: C-. Pretty dull match here as it was mainly Cor Von grinding Van Dam down but the ending was what mattered here. Cor Von continues to look like a beast and having him beat Van Dam is a good sign for his future. The New Breed has all of the momentum right now and ultimately that is going to be the right move. The Originals were a way to hook in fans at the beginning, but why would fans want to see most of them now?

Post match here is CM Punk…..to join the New Breed. The big celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This week mostly focused on the ECW Originals vs. the New Breed and that wasn’t the most thrilling story. The bad guys are way ahead at this point and while that is going to change, it isn’t the most exciting part. I can’t imagine Punk sticks around with Striker and Thorn, but at least they gave us some drama on the way to what should be a twist. The rest of the show was pretty much nothing though and that didn’t make for the best show.

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – April 3, 2007: It Was Happening Sooner Or Later

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: April 3, 2007
Location: Allen County War Memorial, Fort Wayne, Indiana
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We are done with Wrestlemania and ECW actually had more than a bit of a presence. Not only did ECW World Champion Bobby Lashley take out Umaga so Vince McMahon could be shaved bald, but the ECW Originals beat the New Breed in the big eight man tag. Neither seems to be over though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results is you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Bobby Lashley to talk about how big a night Wrestlemania was for him. Everyone is talking about the Battle of the Billionaires and we see some shots of Vince McMahon being shaved at Wrestlemania. We also see Lashley taking Vince’s hat last night on Raw, leaving Vince to hide his bald head under various things, including Lilian Garcia’s skirt. Lashley knows Vince is coming to end his title reign, so bring it on.

We look at the Condemned movie premiere in Detroit, which is the largest premiere of the century or whatever their latest title is.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Punk goes with a hammerlock into a headlock to start and Richards is in early trouble. Richards gets smart by going after Punk’s taped up ribs and a suplex gets two. We pause so Richards can mock the X pose before Punk grabs the abdominal stretch. Richards gets a bit too cocky though and charges into a knee to the face. The ribs are too banged up for Punk to try a suplex so he strikes away at Richards’ face instead. The (first time ever) officially named GTS finishes Richards.

Rating: C-. Richards always had some energy to him in these matches, even if he had a complete lack of a chance of winning anything. Punk gets back to winning after the Money in the Bank loss and that should be part of his way up towards the main event, either around here or elsewhere. ECW isn’t keeping Punk for long, so they should get what they can out of him while they can.

Rob Van Dam is in the back with Timbaland (music producer) and pleasantries are exchanged. Van Dam leaves and Extreme Expose comes in to suggest they get a spot in his new music video. Timbaland seems intrigued.

Matt Striker and Marcus Cor Von offer CM Punk a spot in the New Breed. Punk says no, but Cor Von says you’re with us or against us.

Extreme Expose.

Wrestlemania music video.

Snitsky vs. Hardcore Holly

Holly slugs away to start and gets knocked into the corner for the hammering/choking. The big elbows set up some stomping but Holly gets a foot up in the corner. A suplex is countered into a failed Alabama Slam attempt and Snitsky kicks him in the face for the easy pin.

Post match, Snitsky unloads on Holly with a chair and crushes it in the steps for some hard chair shots. That’s certainly an injury angle to get Holly off of TV for a staph infection.

Hall of Fame induction ceremony video.

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

Extreme Rules, which was going to happen sooner or later. We’re joined in progress with Sabu dropping Striker to set up the one armed camel clutch and everything breaks down in a hurry. The weapons are brought in to clear out the New Breed, meaning it’s time for some dives. Dreamer whips Striker into a trashcan in the corner but Cor Von gets in a cheap shot so the New Breed can take over.

The rest of the Originals are held outside but Dreamer manages a DDT/neckbreaker combination to get a breather. Now the rest of the Originals can come back in to clean house with Sabu getting two on Striker. Burke knocks a swinging Sandman down without much effort but Dreamer hits the baseball slide into the chair into Striker’s face in the Tree of Woe. Sandman cleans house with the kendo stick but Cor Von is back up to suplex Dreamer onto an open chair.

There’s the Pounce to send Dreamer outside so Sabu comes back in to throw a chair at Cor Von’s head. Van Dam slips out of a Razor’s Edge through a table and rolls Thorn up for two. Ariel crotches Van Dam on top but Sabu makes another save. Van Dam and Sabu drive Thorn through the table at the same time but the Van Dam is sent outside. The Elijah Express sends Sabu through a table in the corner though and Burke gets the pin.

Rating: B. This was actually a heck of a sprint and that is what this should have been. Once they came back from the break, this was a pretty awesome match with all eight guys working hard and beating each other up. Odds are this sets up a tables match at Extreme Rules for the big blowoff, though the Punk factor is going to be interesting as well.

Overall Rating: B-. The main event carried the thing, though the rest of the show was little more than a way to have a breather after Wrestlemania. That’s all they needed to do here and it worked quite well, mainly due to one match. Sometimes you need to see something hard hitting and fun, which is what we got on this show. Nice job, though it’s more of a stand alone episode than anything else.

 

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – February 27, 2007: Down He Goes

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: February 27, 2007
Location: HP Pavilion, San Jose, California
Attendance: 13,511
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

The big stories continue to be Bobby Lashley and the ECW Title, plus the New Breed vs. the ECW Originals. Both stories are likely to get a lot of time this week, though Vince McMahon showing up to deal with Lashley should tell you what the focus of this show should be. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Donald Trump picking Bobby Lashley as his representative in the Battle of the Billionaires. This set up a pretty awesome Lashley vs. Umaga brawl on Raw.

Tonight: Lashley has to defend the ECW World Title inside a cage against Hardcore Holly.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Sabu vs. Mr. Kennedy

Extreme Rules. They actually go to the mat to start until Kennedy hits a slam. The running elbow misses but Kennedy is fine enough to whip him into the corner. Sabu knocks him outside and hits the baseball slide, followed by the dive. A chair is thrown in and a table is set up, with Kennedy being knocked into place. Kennedy gets out of the way, so Sabu just dives onto him anyway.

Back in and the Triple Jump Moonsault is countered with a drop toehold into the open chair, allowing Kennedy to kick him in the face. Kennedy awkwardly puts the table inside but the delay lets Sabu hit a legdrop to the back of the head. Sabu goes up but dives through the table by mistake, allowing Kennedy to hit a DDT onto the table for the pin.

Rating: D+. What were you expecting from this kind of a clash of styles? There was no drama on the winner as Sabu isn’t getting anywhere near a match that big. Sabu needed all of his weapons though and that isn’t Kennedy’s thing, making this quite the mess and not very good in any sense.

Vince McMahon arrives and isn’t happy about being late.

Balls Mahoney vs. Matt Striker

Striker actually hits him in the face to start but hurts his hand. Mahoney shows him some better technique and goes up top for the legdrop. Cue Snitsky to jump Mahoney for the DQ in less than a minute.

Snitsky lays both of them out.

Vince McMahon welcomes us to the show and talks about tonight’s cage match for Bobby Lashley’s ECW World Title. Vince doesn’t like Lashley, so we’re changing things up a bit: if Lashley doesn’t win in five minutes, he loses the title. SURPRISE SURPRISE!

Marcus Cor Von/Kevin Thorn vs. Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer

Ariel and Elijah Burke are with the villains while Sandman is with the ECWites. Van Dam drop toeholds Thorn down to start so Dreamer can drop an elbow for two. A hiptoss sends Thorn down as well and Dreamer hammers away in the corner. He even gets in a right hand to cut off Cor Von in a nice save. The distraction lets Cor Von come in and hammer away though, setting up the chinlock.

That’s broken up in a hurry and it’s off to Van Dam for the assortment of kicks. The split legged moonsault gets two and Rolling Thunder gets the same. Everything breaks down and Dreamer dives off the apron onto Cor Von. Ariel tries to throw in the walking stick but Sandman spanks her with the cane. The distraction lets Thorn crotch Van Dam on top and the Dark Kiss is enough for the pin.

Rating: C-. This needed more Cor Von as it wasn’t the most energized match. What mattered here was continuing the New Breed’s advantage over the Originals, which should be the case. The Originals aren’t exactly interesting and other than nostalgia, why should I cheer for any of them other than maybe Van Dam? The New Breed might not be great, but what they’re saying makes sense.

Hardcore Holly knows he’s winning tonight because no one can beat him in five minutes.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Richards shoves him out to the floor to start (that might not have been the plan) but Punk is right back in for an exchange of kicks to the legs. More kicks have Punk down and we hit the neck crank. Punk kicks his way out and gets two off a rollup but Richards kicks him right back into the chinlock. With that broken up, Richards takes him up top for the superplex but gets shoved down in a crash. A top rope clothesline sets up the running knee in the corner and the yet to be named GTS finishes Richards off.

Rating: D. This was really weird as Richards started off in control, put on a bunch of chinlocks and then waited for Punk to beat him. It felt more like a Richards match with Punk winning in the end, which isn’t likely what they were going for here. Punk should have come off looking more dominant here, as it’s just Stevie Richards.

We look at Donald Trump picking Bobby Lashley last night, setting up the brawl, again.

Extreme Expose.

Jerry Lawler is going into the Hall of Fame. This isn’t on Peacock for some reason.

ECW World Title: Bobby Lashley vs. Hardcore Holly

Lashley is defending inside a cage and we have a five minute time limit. As you might expect, Lashley starts fast and hammers away with right hands on the mat. Holly is busted open but avoids a charge so Holly can go up. Lashley goes up too but here are Vince McMahon and Umaga. They fall off the top and Umaga throws in some chairs. Holly clocks Lashley in the head for two with two minutes left. Lashley fights up with a belly to belly suplex and a bunch of chair shots of his own. Another chair to the head drops Holly with a minute left and the running powerslam retains the title in time.

Rating: C. This was angle advancement rather than a regular match and given who was involved, that’s all you could ask for. Holly isn’t a serious threat to win the title and Lashley is on to far bigger and more important things. They got in and out here while doing their thing and that’s the right move for a match like this.

Post match Umaga and Lashley stare each other down. Lashley gets a running start and launches himself into the cage wall, knocking it over and crushing Umaga in the process. Both guys are down to end the show as Armando Alejandro Estrada panics. I’ve always loved this ending as not only is it different, but it makes Lashley look like the kind of monster who can go toe to toe with Umaga.

It’s different from the John Cena feud, as Cena was able to fight enough until he could find a way around Umaga. Lashley is someone who might be able to just beat him one on one through straight power. Awesome ending, if nothing else due to the cage wall knocking Umaga down so fast.

Overall Rating: C-. The ending helped a lot but this was one of their weaker shows so far. The matches weren’t working for the most part and it just kind of kept going. What helps here is that the Originals vs. New Breed and McMahon involvement makes the show feel important. That has been lacking since ECW debuted and while it isn’t going to last forever, it is nice to see for the moment.

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ECW On Sci Fi – September 5, 2006: I Love It When A Show…Ok They’re Not There Yet

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 5, 2006
Location: Civic Center, Columbus, Georgia
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s time for more guest stars as a ticked off DX is here to face Big Show in a handicap match. For once this is actually part of a story as DX will be facing Show and the McMahons in the Cell at Unforgiven. Hopefully this serves as a good setup for the match, but you never can tell what you are going to get around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of DX surviving against the McMahons and company at Summerslam.

DX arrives and confirms that this is the right place (HHH: “Bingo.”). Good thing their travel arrangements were properly made.

Opening sequence.

Sabu/Rob Van Dam vs. Test/Mike Knox

Extreme Rules and Kelly Kelly is here with the monsters. Since it’s Extreme Rules, we start with Sabu vs. Knox because WWE doesn’t understand their own rules. Sabu gets in a shot to Knox and quickly brings in Van Dam, which is probably the best idea in the “extreme” portion. The first table is loaded up at ringside and Sabu grabs a chair for a bonus. Rob manages a spinwheel kick in the corner and Rolling Thunder gets two on Test. Sabu comes in for his half of a double springboard leg lariat for two on Knox.

Everything breaks down (at least they didn’t waste time) and Van Dam has to kick Test in the face to save Sabu from a gorilla press. Everyone but Sabu fight on the apron in front of the table so Sabu uses the chair as a launchpad to drive through all through said table. We take a break and come back with Test breaking up the Triple Jump Moonsault but getting chaired into the corner.

Van Dam skateboards the chair into Test’s face but Knox chairs him down to break up the Five Star. There’s a superplex to Van Dam, only to have Sabu hit Knox with a chair for two. Another chair shot gets one with Test making the save but Air Sabu hits him in the corner. The Triple Jump Moonsault connects for a rather delayed two and it’s time for a fresh table. Rob starts throwing the chairs and it’s the guillotine legdrop/Five Star to drive Knox through the table for the pin.

Rating: C+. The dumb tagging part aside, this actually felt like something involving ECW, which is one of the only times that has been the case so far. If nothing else, it would be a lot to take to see Sabu and Van Dam lose to these two goons. At least they seem to be starting to move in a slightly better direction, but it might already be too late.

Kevin Thorn and Ariel do their tarot card thing and decide it means something sexual.

It’s time for Striker’s Classroom with Striker telling everyone that they’re stupid. These people need to stop learning about Michael Vick and read more books by Rush Limbaugh. He’s too smart to be stupid though and as a result, he won’t swim in the ocean with stingrays (it was earlier in the week). Cue Sandman through the crowd (Striker: “You’re a little bit inebriated! Come on!”) to chase Striker off and write SUX under Striker’s name on the chalkboard. Striker says that just proved his point before leaving.

Video on the Marine.

Stevie Richards vs. Balls Mahoney

Before the match, Kevin Thorn and Ariel come to the commentary booth, where Ariel climbs onto Joey for a lap dance. Richards takes Mahoney down inside as Joey is sounding a little more nervous than usual. Mahoney fights out of a chinlock in a hurry but is right back down in it a few seconds later. This time the comeback actually works with Mahoney getting a rollup for two. Thorn and Ariel get on the apron for a distraction though and Richards hits a low blow for the fast pin.

Shannon Moore says he’s bringing sexy back. CM Punk comes up to call him a poser and slaps him in the face. Punk leaves and Moore starts crying.

Big Show vs. D-Generation X

Non-title and Paul Heyman and his security are here. Before the match, Heyman says he has made a mistake and this will NOT be under Extreme Rules. There are no tags here so HHH slugs away and helps Shawn get in a DDT. Show isn’t having any of this double suplex stuff though and sends DX into various corners.

The Vader Bomb misses but it’s time for the security guards to go after HHH. That leaves Shawn alone with Show in the ring, where a gorilla press cuts off the LET’S GO DX chant. We hit the bearhug on Shawn so he gets smart by going to the eye in a hurry. HHH comes back in for the facebuster and the spinebuster but Hardcore Holly comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was as glorified of a cameo as you could have had from DX but you have three main event stars in a match so it’s not like they were going to be too bad. Holly coming in for the DQ at the end was a lame way to go but it made the most sense given the circumstances. It was as good as it was going to be here and everyone carried their part well enough.

Post match the brawl is on with the security guards helping put Shawn down. HHH comes in with the sledgehammer (including swinging it down onto one of the heads of one of the helmeted guards) and the villains run to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was one of the better ECWs so far and a lot of that is because it wasn’t the villains running roughshod over everyone. At some point you have to have the good guys give you some hope spots and that is what they did here. The show still isn’t great, but after everything they have been doing so far, the last few weeks have been a nice breath of air. Who knew Hardcore Holly might have been the secret all along?

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ECW On Sci Fi – August 29, 2006: It’s Starting To Come Together

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: August 29, 2006
Location: Sovereign Center, Reading, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Believe it or not, this week’s show is about Paul Heyman, who is the big evil around here and therefore has to deal with Sabu. I’m not the biggest Sabu fan, but if they want this show to have anything to do with the original ECW, Sabu is one of their best options. Granted I have no reason to believe WWE is going to have him do anything but challenge for the title so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Big Show beating Sabu again last week but getting put through a table after the match.

Paul Heyman talks about how this is his ECW and now, for the first time ever, he is wrestling in an ECW ring. Like Dr. Frankenstein, he has to destroy his old creation by pinning Sabu 1-2-3.

Opening sequence.

Rob Van Dam vs. Hardcore Holly

Van Dam starts fast with a monkey flip to send Holly to the floor so Rob gets the chance to finger point. A slugout goes to Van Dam and he hits the spinning kick to the back with Holly over the barricade. Back in and some right hands in the corner have Holly staggered but he manages to toss Van Dam to the floor for the big crash. The chinlock goes on back inside but Rob fights up because it’s a chinlock, meaning we get the clothesline comeback. The standing moonsault into Rolling Thunder gets two but the Five Star misses. Holly goes to get a chair but Rob takes it away and draws the DQ.

Rating: C-. Holly does fit the smash mouth style of ECW, but he’s also not the kind of name who would have ever been allowed in the original ECW, which is where things start to go downhill. He’s been known as a low level guy for so long that suddenly presenting him as someone who might matter doesn’t work. Just having him beat up Van Dam for a few minutes doesn’t make him a star, and neither does being around for thirteen years and being best known as part of a mostly comedy division.

Post match Rob chairs him away again.

Rene Dupree likes to be in shape because he’s extreme.

Here’s Big Show to talk about how awesome and dominant he is, both here, at Summerslam, on Raw and at Unforgiven. He’s so confident that he challenges DX to face him in a handicap match next week.

Shannon Moore says fight the power.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Joey says Richards should be Punk’s toughest challenge in ECW to date. So is it not official ECW history that Justin Credible was a lame ECW Champion? Richards misses a charge to start and winds up on the floor, allowing Punk to take him down with a suicide dive. Back in and Richards strikes away with some knees to the ribs, followed by a kneeling bearhug of all things. Punk comes back with a leg lariat into a butterfly backbreaker for two. The Anaconda Vice finishes Richards in a hurry.

Rating: D+. The fans weren’t impressed with Punk here but it makes sense to give him win after win. It has worked as a way to establish new wrestlers for the better part of ever and it will work with him. You can see the star power in him as he looks and carries himself like a far bigger deal than almost anyone else around here. That’s one of the best things someone can do and Punk does it as well as almost anyone in ECW.

Video on Sabu.

Here’s Matt Striker for Striker’s Classroom. Striker thinks people should cheer for him but instead they cheer for the Sandman, who is ossified from his giggle water. See, Striker is an intellectual giant drowning in a cesspool of derelicts. Here’s Sandman for the brawl, with Striker hitting him in the head with a stapler. That’s enough to leave Sandman bloody so Striker can run off.

Kelly Kelly interrupts Balls Mahoney and lets him see what is underneath her robe. Mahoney heartily approves.

Commentary talks about Kurt Angle being released. That’s still a weird way to send him off.

Speaking far too calmly, Sabu promises to massacre Paul Heyman.

Sabu vs. Paul Heyman

Extreme Rules and Heyman’s security is here with him. The guards jump Sabu to start but he manages to get a chair and clean house. Heyman knows he is in trouble but Sabu dives onto the invading Big Show instead, though Show pulls him out of the air. A DDT on the floor drops Show but he’s right back up to beat Sabu down, albeit with the guards’ help. Sabu is beaten down and Heyman screams at Sabu about how he made him. The beatdown continues, with Heyman getting a right hand in on Sabu’s bloody head.

That’s enough to send Heyman running around in celebration because he has blood on his hand. Heyman talks trash but Sabu gets a hand on him so Heyman screams for Show. Sabu is almost thrown through the table but here’s Rob Van Dam to make the save. A Van Daminator puts Show down in the corner and Rob dives onto the guards.

Sabu uses the breather to get in a few shots on Heyman but Show cuts off the springboard dive to put Heyman through the table. Cue Hardcore Holly to Alabama Slam Van Dam through the table, leaving Show to hit the cobra clutch backbreaker on Sabu. A legdrop from Show lets Heyman steal the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was a huge mess of course but I don’t think anyone was buying this as being anything else from the start. It’s smart to have Van Dam get back into the main event scene because he’s easily the biggest name ECW has outside of (maybe) Big Show. If nothing else, he is a bigger name than Sabu and that Show needs a fresh challenger after being Sabu multiple times.

Post match Sabu is chokeslammed through a table so evil posing can end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t very good this week but overall, the show was a leap and a bound better than what it has been doing lately. Above all else, it felt like something was happening for a change and that they had some goals in mind. That’s a lot better than having Show beat up some guest star, which he’ll likely get to do next week. It might not be a good show, but it’s at least a show that makes a bit more sense and that’s a big upgrade after the last few weeks.

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ECW On Sci Fi – July 18, 2006 (2020 Redo): Just Stop It Already

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: July 18, 2006
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

It’s time for another guest star, mainly because Kurt Angle is on hiatus and Rob Van Dam is suspended, leaving no one to challenge Big Show. This time around it’s the Undertaker, who seems like someone who could thrive in the hardcore stuff. Then again you never can really tell with this stuff so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

We open with Kelly’s Expose and it’s the same as always, with Mike Knox interrupting. They head to the ring, with Knox saying what is about to happen is due to her.

Mike Knox vs. Sandman

Fallout from Sandman attacking Knox last week. Sandman busts himself open with the beer can so Knox jumps him from behind to start and takes things outside for the brawl. A whip into the barricade sets up some elbow drops to keep Sandman down and they head back inside. Sandman hits a bulldog to send Knox outside and it’s time for the cane. Naturally he hits Kelly by mistake, allowing Knox to hit a low blow for the fast pin.

Knox leaves the unconscious Kelly at ringside. The replay shows that Knox pulled Kelly in the way of the cane shot.

Shannon Moore is coming.

During the break, Kelly was stretchered out.

Here’s Paul Heyman, flanked by the riot guards, for a chat. Heyman says his children all have to drink the Kool Aid from the same glass. Last week he explained suspending Rob Van Dam to protect himself but now he hears confusion. Cue Tommy Dreamer to interrupt, with Heyman looking a bit confused.

Dreamer says he has been with Heyman since the beginning and now he wants an explanation of what Heyman is doing. Everyone is confused so what is going on? Heyman kisses Dreamer on the mouth and here’s Test to run Dreamer over with the big boot. The TKO leaves Dreamer laying, as Joey thinks Test might be working for Heyman. Maybe. It’s possible.

Balls Mahoney says with his name, you have to be extreme. He may be a bit nuts, but he likes things that way.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Non-extreme rules (because that worked so well last time) rematch from Saturday Night’s Main Event (because that worked so well last time). The fans want tables but get a headlock from Sabu, who is driven into the corner for the break. Stevie stomps him down and puts on an armbar but that’s broken up in a hurry. A running leg lariat drops Richards for two and a tornado DDT plants him again. The camel clutch makes Richards tap.

Rating: D. I know you have to have these people on the show to make it feel like ECW (or at least in name only) but these guys feel so tacked on. The previous segment felt important, but Sandman felt like a pest for Knox to beat up and this felt like WWE saying “There. Happy now?”. They aren’t even hiding it that much anymore and the sooner they cut the cord, the better.

CM Punk talks about his background in various martial arts, which make him so much more of a dangerous wrestler. It’s almost weird to see him with the longer hair.

The vampire introduces the tarot card reader as Ariel, who shows us the death card and her bloody neck.

Video on Big Show’s path of destruction.

ECW World Title: Big Show vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is challenging and this feels so wrong. Show drives him into the corner and unloads with elbows so Undertaker evens things up with kicks to the ribs. The slugout gets the fans into things a bit so Show headbutts him down to cut them off. They trade big boots for a double knockdown and Show sends him to the floor as we take a break. Back with Undertaker hitting a Stunner over the top rope but getting kneed down for two. Undertaker’s own headbutt just hurts him again and Show takes it to the floor for a second time.

Undertaker is sent head first into the steps but he’s back with elbows to the face. Another headbutt takes Undertaker down back inside but this time he pulls Show into a kneebar. That’s broken up as well and Show pounds him down, only to charge into a boot in the corner. Old School is broken up though and it’s a superplex to give Show two….as Undertaker sits up. Undertaker’s chokeslam is broken up and there’s another headbutt. The cobra clutch is countered as well and now Old School can connect. Cue Great Khali to go after Undertaker, with Big Show joining in for the double countout.

Rating: C-. It was your run of the mill Undertaker vs. Big Show match and that’s your first big problem. These two work out well enough against each other but at the same time, it’s something that has been done so many times that it doesn’t exactly draw much interest. Undertaker down in ECW feels like one of the times he would challenge for the Intercontinental Title, as it almost feels like he got lost on the way to his real match.

Post match Undertaker isn’t having any of this and starts wildly swinging a chair, only to get beaten down again. A double chokeslam through the announcers’ table ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show really felt like they didn’t have any idea what they were doing and just threw a bunch of stuff together to fill in their allotted time. ECW really doesn’t serve much of a purpose and it isn’t getting much better, meaning I’m not sure where this show is going to go. Wherever it is, it needs to be an upgrade from here though, because things are getting rough.

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Saturday Night’s Main Event #33 (2020 Redo): And It’s Over

Saturday Night’s Main Event #33
Date: July 15, 2006
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Attendance: 17,343
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time for another special, which is really code for a commercial for the Great American Bash and ultimately Summerslam. These shows don’t mean much in the days of Raw and Smackdown, but there is something about that name that makes it feel special. It helps that the card is fairly stacked so hopefully it works out. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here are Hulk Hogan and his daughter Brooke (Lawler approves) to open things up. Brooke says it has always been her dream to be here with her dad. Hulk says thank goodness she looks like her mom and talks about being on the first ever Saturday Night’s Main Event. Cue Randy, with a rose, to interrupt. He says Hulk is the biggest legend anywhere and says Brooke is beautiful, even presenting her with the rose. Randy is a Hulkamaniac as well, so he would like to respectively challenge Hulk to a match at Summerslam. Hulk respectively accepts, but doesn’t seem to like how Randy is looking at Brooke. Short and to the point.

Video on Batista.

King Booker/Finlay/Mark Henry vs. Rey Mysterio/Bobby Lashley/Batista

Lashley sends Finlay into the corner to start and it’s a six man standoff as we take an early break. Back with Finlay slapping a chinlock on Rey before it’s quickly off to Booker. Various things start breaking down, allowing the Leprechaun to slip Finlay the shillelagh to deck Rey for two. Rey is fine enough to kick Henry down (oh dear) but the referee doesn’t see the hot tag to Batista. Booker comes in but Rey dives between their legs and NOW the hot tag brings in Batista. House is cleaned and it’s a 619 to Booker, setting up the Batista Bomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. And that’s going to be Henry’s last televised match for about ten months as Henry completely destroyed his knee (the patella was split completely in two) so forget about Batista’s big revenge. The injury shook things up a lot as you can only get so much out of the good guys being up 3-2, but they did what they could. They did what they could, and it could have been a lot worse.

Vince McMahon gives the Spirit Squad a pep talk but DX takes over the audio, turning it into Vince giving the team spanking instructions.

We see highlights of the first round of Diva Bull Riding from earlier today. Victoria and Michelle McCool made the finals.

Melina/Johnny Nitro vs. Carlito/Trish Stratus

The men start but Nitro tags Melina in, meaning Trish has to do the same (come in, not tag Melina). Nitro trips Trish down early on and Melina adds a thumb to the eye (JR: “You wouldn’t see Meredith Vieira doing something like that.”), setting up a double hair takedown. That bangs up Melina as well so it’s a double tag to the men as everything breaks down. The women fight to the floor and the Backstabber gives Carlito the fast pin. This was really rushed so it didn’t have the chance to go anywhere.

Earlier today, Kevin Von Erich got to make a quick appearance. Nothing wrong with the local legend.

Spirit Squad vs. D-Generation X

Non-title elimination tag and there is a cell on either side of the ring for eliminated members. Shawn says the following thrashing of five male cheerleaders is brought to you by DX, and if you’re not down with that, catchphrase. Shawn gets taken into the corner to start but he manages to grab the megaphone and clean some house. The Squad bails to the floor for a huddle, which HHH breaks up with an air horn. Back in and Shawn superkicks Mitch for the first elimination.

Back from a break with HHH getting rid of Johnny with a spinebuster. Shawn chases Kenny up to the stage, where Vince gets in a chair shot to put Shawn in trouble. They head back to the ring where Shawn suplexes his way out of a sleeper. It’s off to HHH to clean house, including another spinebuster. A double clothesline sets up the Pedigree to get rid of Nicky and it’s 2-2. The superkick gets rid of Mikey and it’s a top rope elbow, followed by Sweet Chin Music into the Pedigree to complete the shutout.

Rating: D. You could say this about any match involving these two sides, but what were you expecting? It’s a pair of the best of all time against five goons. It’s almost a miracle that the Squad lasted this long and it isn’t hard to believe that Shawn and HHH could dispatch them this fast. There was no reason to believe this would be a competitive match and it wasn’t but it also wasn’t anything more than a DX workout session.

Post match Vince tries to unlock the cage but Shawn superkicks him inside with the rest of the Squad.

Video on Sabu.

Here are Great Khali and Daivari for a chat. Daivari talks about how awesome Khali is….and here are Big Show and Paul Heyman to interrupt. Show lists off his size and resume and says one day they’ll have to see who the real giant is. That’s for later though, as he wants to put Khali over tonight. He brings up the Punjabi Prison match but here’s Undertaker to interrupt. Undertaker goes after Khali and clotheslines him to the floor before going after Show. Khali gets back in and a double chokeslam leaves Undertaker laying.

Post break, Big Show says Undertaker can come face him on ECW if he has the guts.

Stevie Richards vs. Sabu

Extreme Rules. Sabu wastes no time in throwing a chair at Richards, setting up the Triple Jump Moonsault for two. Richards misses a charge in the corner and gets laid on a table, setting up the….flying something with a chair kind of in the same area to drive Richards through an already broken table for the pin. This was vintage WWECW: take away any story, feud, reason for these two for fighting and the character that made Richards work and have a match with weapons for the sake of having weapons, because that’s all ECW was about.

We get Brooke Hogan’s About Us music video.

Randy Orton is talking to Brooke Hogan in the parking lot but Hulk comes in to break that up. The Hogans go to leave but Orton runs back in with an RKO onto the trunk to leave Hulk laying.

Michelle McCool wins the Diva Bull Riding contest. Much like the Diva Search, it’s an excuse to have the Divas in various outfits doing various things that involve a lot of shaking.

Video on John Cena losing the Raw World Title to Rob Van Dam, who lost it to Edge, setting up tonight’s title match (which isn’t a triple threat for Van Dam’s title because Van Dam screwed up).

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Edge is defending and has Lita with him. We get the Big Match Intros and Edge drops straight to the floor, only to have Cena cut him off in a hurry. Edge low bridges him to the floor though and we take an early break. Back with Edge hammering away in the corner and loading up a superplex, only to slip off the ropes and crash down hard. The referee makes sure they’re both alive and Edge gets two off a big boot. Cena pops up and initiates the finishing sequence but Lita pulls the referee out. The referee is down and Edge misses a spear, setting up the STFU. Lita slaps the referee to send him back inside to call the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was nothing with barely five minutes factoring out the commercial. The biggest problem was the time, which only gave them a chance for one memorable deal, which wound up being Edge nearly killing both of them (it was just a slip). They’re destined for the real match at Summerslam so for now, this worked out fine for the “we’re out of time but here’s what we promised” main event.

Cena celebrates but thankfully understands what the word DISQUALIFICATION means and immediately knows he didn’t win the title. That’s not cool with Cena, who hits a pretty good looking FU off the steps and through the announcers’ table.

Overall Rating: D. Completely skippable show here and you can see how unimportant this series has become. There is no need for some big special when you have the same thing done every Monday and Friday night. The wrestling wasn’t important, the Undertaker appearance was to set up a guest star spot on ECW and there was a bull riding contest for obvious reasons. Nothing to see here, and thankfully WWE/NBC seemed to understand that, as the next one wasn’t for almost a year.

 

 

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Ring of Honor TV – January 6, 2016: Rise Above Spoilers

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Date: January 6, 2016
Location: 2300 Arena, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 600
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Mr. Wrestling III

Opening sequence.

TV Title: Roderick Strong vs. Stevie Richards

Will Ferrara vs. Caprice Coleman

Prince Nana comes out and looks rather happy.

Cedric Alexander vs. Jonathan Gresham

Anniversary show ad.

Michael Elgin vs. Donovan Dijak

Elgin is staggered by a boot to the face but runs Dijak over again. A pretty impressive gorilla press puts Donovan down again and an even longer delayed vertical suplex gets two. Back up and Donovan sends him to the apron for a discus big boot (yes a discus big boot) and we take a break. We come back with Donovan dropping him with a release suplex for two and putting on a cravate.

Elgin and Lethal stare each other down to end the show.

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