Monday Night Raw – January 25, 2021: A Horse, A Haircut And Red Makeup

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 25, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Samoa Joe, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for the Royal Rumble and the big draw this week is the double return of Drew McIntyre and Goldberg. I’m not sure how much of an appeal that is supposed to have but WWE certainly sees something in it. Also we get a rematch from last week with Asuka defending the Women’s Title against Alexa Bliss, because WWE doesn’t like waiting on much. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Drew McIntyre to get things going. Drew is rather emotional to be back here and thanks everyone who sent him well wishes. The virus is a horrible thing but we are going to get through it together. Speaking of things we will get through, this Sunday it is going to be Drew McIntyre vs. Bill Goldberg for the WWE Title. Goldberg was 173-0 in WCW and ran through the Rock like he was nothing….and then he disappeared.

The last thing to go in a heavyweight fighter is his power but Goldberg has started a new streak. Every champion he has challenged since returning to WWE has gone down but on Sunday, Drew is ending the streak. Cue Miz and John Morrison to mock the idea of King Kong vs. Godzilla on Sunday because one of them could wind up injured after the match. That opens a door for a Money in the Bank cash-in because whoever wins is going to be a sitting duck.

Miz promises to win the title but here’s Goldberg to cut them off. Goldberg: “You, me, Sunday, you’re next.” The staredown is on so Miz and Morrison make some jokes from the apron, earning themselves a double beatdown, with Miz taking the spear and Morrison getting Claymored. Another staredown ensues as I beg of WWE to end the Miz thing on Sunday because it is managing to hurt a story that had almost nothing going for it in the first place.

Charlotte says she knows how to perform well under pressure. Tonight she wants Shayna Baszler to bring her invisible crown because it’s one thing to pretend to be a queen and another to actually be one. On Sunday, she is entering the Royal Rumble and defending the Tag Team Titles. As for Lacey Evans and Ric Flair, she has seen her father in some dark places before but this might be the darkest. She’ll be ready though, because she is Ms. Wrestlemania.

Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia Jax is here with Shayna Baszler but Asuka isn’t here because she and Charlotte are the most worthless Tag Team Champions in the history of the title. Charlotte starts fast by kicking Baszler down and hitting a baseball slide on Jax. The Figure Eight goes on in a hurry but Jax comes in for the DQ at 56 seconds. Good, as there is no reason to burn off Charlotte vs. Baszler in a real match here.

Post match the beatdown is on with Mandy Rose and Dana Brooke coming in for the failed save. Lacey Evans is in as well and the six woman is ready for after the break.

Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke/Charlotte vs. Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax/Lacey Evans

Mandy and Lacey exchange wristlocks to start before it’s off to Dana to knock Lacey down again. Shayna and Charlotte come in with Shayna kicking away at the leg. That’s enough to send Charlotte over for another tag to Mandy, who takes Baszler into the corner. The alternating beatdown is on with Charlotte kneeing Baszler outside. Charlotte stops to glare at Nia and Lacey but gets rammed into the apron. Shayna throws her back inside….and doesn’t beat the count at 4:44. Everyone seems confused and I can’t imagine that was the planned finish because it just ended out of nowhere.

And never mind as we come back from a break with the match continuing thanks to a decision made by Adam Pearce during the break. Jax runs Brooke over with a clothesline and taking her into the corner. Shayna does the stomp down onto Dana’s arm but Dana gets over for the tag to Mandy anyway. Everything breaks down and Charlotte chases Lacey over the barricade as Dana gets the tag again. Nia misses a charge into the post and Dana gets two off a running flip neckbreaker. A powerbomb into a chokeslam plants Dana again and the legdrop finishes for Nia at 14:05 (counting the break).

Rating: D+. Again. They did it again. One more time, Nia and Shayna beat Dana and Mandy because that’s all these four know how to do. The law of diminishing returns has been in effect for months with these teams but here we are again. Speaking of again, Charlotte and Asuka still might as well not be a team, so hopefully they lose the titles on Sunday and end this worthless idea.

We look at Mace beating Xavier Woods last week.

Mustafa Ali loved what he saw and is ready to destroy Kofi Kingston.

Earlier today, Ali talked about coming after Kofi because he had the greatest moment in his life after Ali had the worst moment of his life.

Xavier Woods vs. Slapjack

Woods charges at him to start but gets kneed down for his efforts. Slapjack bangs up his knee on a missed double stomp though and Woods strikes away. Woods nails a running knee to finish Slapjack for the pin at 2:49.

Post match Retribution beats Woods down, with Ali grabbing a chair. Instead he sits down in it though and says for someone who acts like a king, Woods looks like a peasant right now. Ali has heard that Kofi won’t be competing in the Royal Rumble, but don’t worry because he’ll take Kofi’s place.

Riddle is on his way to the ring when he runs into R-Truth, who has heard about a birthday party. Truth thinks it is for him because it was his birthday last week and they might have 24 karat gold carrots for him. Goat noises are shared.

It’s time for the talk show before a match involving the people in the talk show, this time featuring the Hurt Business in the VIP Lounge. MVP is ready to own the Royal Rumble and tells Cedric Alexander to focus on the task at hand tonight. Bobby Lashley talks about how the team is draped in gold (and silver) and they are just beginning. They have a present for MVP in the form of a THB chain. MVP is rather impressed but Cedric and Shelton argue over the design.

Cue R-Truth to ask about the surprise party, because THB must mean Truth Happy Birthday. Shelton: “Truth, now is not the time.” Truth: “Is it a dance break?” Lashley apologizes for forgetting his birthday last week but he has a gift inside the ring. Here comes the Menagerie of Numskulls to go after the title, with the Hurt Business getting involved. MVP isn’t impressed, but here’s Riddle with the Final Flash to knock him silly. It takes talent to squeeze in two stupid ideas into one segment so well done.

Edge is back tonight. Works for me.

R-Truth asks Adam Pearce if he can enter the Money in the Bank match. AJ Styles and Omos come up with AJ offering his services in a qualifying match. Styles says he’s benevolent, so Truth says he’s a Capricorn. Pearce says if Truth can beat AJ, he’ll consider a Rumble spot. Truth things Omos is a Taurus, like the one he had that broke down one time. Confused Truth is still one of my favorite things in WWE.

We look back at the opening segment.

Sheamus vs. John Morrison

Both are officially in the Rumble and Miz is in Morrison’s corner. Morrison takes him down with a headlock to start but Sheamus is back up with a hammerlock. The chinlock keeps Morrison down until he fights up, only to get backdropped right back down. Morrison gets in a shot to the throat and break dances over for a kick to the back. Sheamus pops up and grabs the Irish Curse for two before heading to the top.

The top rope clothesline is dropkicked out of the air with a shot to the knee, setting up a running knee to put Sheamus on the apron. Back in and Morrison works on the leg with a leg crank and an elbow to the knee. Sheamus uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom, setting up a release Rock Bottom for two more. The Cloverleaf is blocked and it’s a knee to the face to set up White Noise to finish Morrison at 9:33.

Rating: C. As usual, this worked out well and I’m not surprised by this. They’re always good together and that was on display again. It’s a little weird to have the heel as the speed and the face as the power, but they kept Miz to a minimum and let the guys do their thing, which is exactly the right idea.

Post match Miz wants a handicap match so that’s on as well, as we now have a third Miz and Morrison segment in the first two hours.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Sheamus

No tags here as Morrison takes out Sheamus’ knee to start so Miz can get a DDT for two. An enziguri into a clothesline puts Sheamus on the floor, with Morrison nailing a nice dive. Sheamus gets sent hard into the barricade for some running shots to the head. Back in and Miz stomps Sheamus down in the corner but Sheamus manages to send Morrison outside.

A running clothesline drops Miz and there’s a powerslam to the returning Morrison. Sheamus Regal Rolls Miz onto Morrison and then sends them outside for the double top rope clothesline. Morrison breaks up the Brogue Kick back inside but Sheamus shrugs off the Skull Crushing Finale. The Brogue Kick drops Morrison but it’s the Skull Crushing Finale to finish Sheamus at 6:49.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I thought I would have, and as much as I want to put Miz into that briefcase and send him to the planet Flaflooga, Sheamus got into the zone that he rarely reaches anymore and that’s a good thing. He really can do the power thing well and Miz and Morrison work well together in spots like this. Sheamus and Morrison have some very good chemistry together as well so I’m not sure why I’m surprised I had a good time here.

Ric Flair and Lacey Evans grapple a bit when Charlotte comes in. Lacey leaves and Flair says he’s doing what he wants to do. Charlotte says he spent his money on everyone but his family but this isn’t cute anymore. Flair is going from legend to old man and she isn’t the bad guy. Ric glares at her as Lacey comes back in and hits her with the Woman’s Right. Lacey asks Flair to explain the WOO as they leave Charlotte laying.

AJ Styles vs. R-Truth

Non-title. Feeling out process to start with Truth sending him over the top but getting caught in a staredown with Styles. Back in and AJ misses the Phenomenal Forearm, allowing Truth to start up the John Cena finishing sequence. There’s the Shuffle but the AA is countered into the Calf Crusher for the tap at 2:35.

We look back at Randy Orton being all masked and creepy. I think this is just airing the same segment from last week.

And now, Alexa’s Playground with Bliss reciting Mary Mary Quite Contrary. She loves what she and Fiend did to Randy Orton two weeks ago and looks at a video of last week’s promo (which we just saw). Bliss thinks he looks better now and says that she just wanted to have some fun with Asuka in her playground. Now we look at Bliss watching herself and Asuka from last week (after watching her talk on the big screens in the Thunderdome). Bliss throws in some Ring Around The Rosey and her face turns into the Fiend for the LET ME IN. Total time spent on watching recaps: seven minutes.

Riddle vs. Hurt Business

Gauntlet match and if Riddle wins, he gets a title shot at Lashley. Shelton Benjamin starts things off and counters a kick into a spinebuster for two. The chinlock goes on and Shelton adds a knee but gets pulled into a guillotine. Shelton tries to muscle him into a suplex so Riddle knees him in the head. A rollup should have Riddle pinned but Cedric Alexander gets on the apron. Shelton yells at Alexander and gets rolled up for the pin at 4:48. MVP is in next and, as he yells at Shelton and Alexander for arguing, gets pulled into a kneebar for the tap at 5:24. Cedric is in last and we take a break.

Back with Cedric putting a knee in Riddle’s back and cranking on the arm. Riddle fights up so Cedric hits a heck of a dropkick for two. The abdominal stretch goes on but Riddle reverses into a suplex, which is countered into a DDT. Back up and Riddle kicks him in the head to start the real comeback.

A t-bone suplex sends Alexander flying but he gets the knees up to block the Broton. Riddle grabs a German suplex to put Alexander down again, only to get pulled into a brainbuster for two more. A quick triangle choke is countered into a powerbomb but Riddle hangs onto the choke. Back up and Riddle grabs a rollup for the pin at 12:24.

Rating: C. Riddle vs. Shelton and MVP were about as nothing as you could get but Alexander had a good match. That being said, the whole Hurt Business in-fighting stuff is still one of the worst things going on around here as of late. It isn’t that surprising though, as the team is good, polished and feel like a threat so they must be stamped out.

Post match Lashley comes out to give Riddle the Hurt Lock to leave him laying.

The WWE Network is moving to Peacock. If it doesn’t increase the price and you get the same things, I’m good with it.

We look at the opening sequence again.

Edge joins us for the first time in several months to talk about how you aren’t guaranteed tomorrow. Ten years ago, he went to Wrestlemania XXVII and left as champion. Then he lost everything because of his neck and took nine years to get back. He remembers telling his mom that he wanted to be a wrestler and she told him you have to go do it.

With that in mind, he is entering the Royal Rumble. He doesn’t have much time left so he is going to fight with everything he has to make this far fetched dream come true. If you have been with him on this ride until now, you have to try. A world without dreamers and fighters is a much less magical place. He quotes Henry Ford, who said if you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right. Edge thinks he can, and he’ll see us at the Royal Rumble.

Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss is challenging in a rematch from last week. Asuka takes her down into an armbar to start but misses the hip attack. Bliss kicks her to the floor….and then gets on the rocking horse that appears in the ring. Back from a break with Bliss fighting out of a chinlock and getting kicked in the face. Asuka hits another kick in the corner but Bliss’ old music starts playing and now she has her regular gear on (and longer hair).

Bliss sends Asuka face first into the corner and then the lights go out, with Bliss going into the other corner. She does Bray Wyatt’s lean backwards and becomes Fiend Bliss. Asuka’s knee to the face just annoys Bliss and the Asuka Lock but Bliss powers out of it. The Mandible Claw goes on but here’s Randy Orton with red makeup because this company doesn’t know how burns work either for an RKO to Bliss and the no contest at 12:33.

Rating: F. I like Randy Orton, I like Alexa Bliss and I like Asuka. If you put all three of those people into a match and angle, I should like the product. Instead, this was like an eight year old on a sugar rush saying “And then this happens and then this happens but it doesn’t count and then this happens and then the show is over.” They had part of a match and then it was something about a horse and a goddess walking into an RKO. I would say I probably got some of the details wrong in there, but I don’t think there were any details involved in the first place.

Overall Rating: D. And yet, somehow it’s better than last week’s show. This show was going along somewhat nicely and then went FLYING off the rails in the end, with one dumb idea after another. Maybe it’s all the time that they have to fill, but the more I think about it, the more worried I am that this is really what they think is the best use of Raw every week. Between the wrestlers working multiple times, the people watching promos from last week and people doing completely stupid things just because the script calls for it, this was another shining example of how bad Raw can be and that’s a scary thought going forward.

Results

Charlotte b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Nia Jax interfered

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler/Lacey Evans b. Charlotte/Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Legdrop to Brooke

Xavier Woods b. Slapjack – Knee to the face

Sheamus b. John Morrison – White Noise

Miz/John Morrison b. Sheamus – Skull Crushing Finale

AJ Styles b. R-Truth – Calf Crusher

Riddle b. Hurt Business – Rollup to Alexander

Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss went to a no contest

 

 

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Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2015 (2016 Redo): They Came To Play

Royal Rumble 2015
Date: January 25, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 17,164
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Now this is one I’ve been looking forward to and dreading at the same time. I actually didn’t mind the main event the first time around but ever since then I haven’t been able to think of a single good thing that match did. It should be interesting (hopefully) to see how far this thing has fallen in just a year. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Talk about a year making a big difference. Cesaro and Kidd looked to be the hottest team in years and now they’re both out while New Day, who looked to be a horrible disaster, actually IS the hottest team in years. As usual, time can change so much in wrestling. As usual, Woods is the odd man out here. Adam Rose is here with Kidd/Cesaro for no adequately explained reason but the fans would rather cheer for Cesaro anyway.

Kidd and Big E. get things going as the announcers talk about the Rumble instead. Ok to be fair, it’s a pre-show tag match with nothing on the line so I can live with it here. Big E. grabs a few backbreakers to start before it’s off to Kofi for two off a dropkick. Cesaro comes in for a BIG reaction and you can tell who the star of this match is going to be.

It’s quickly back to Big E. who takes over with a shoulder in the corner, followed by a middle rope cross body from Kofi. Lawler: “I like New Day but I’m excited to see what they’re going to evolve into.” Cesaro and Kidd take Kofi into the corner and I still don’t get why Rose is on the floor. Like, I don’t remember that in the slightest and it’s bizarre to see a year later. The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick (still awesome) gets two and we take a break.

Back with Cesaro holding Kofi in a chinlock but Kingston comes back with a dropkick to Kidd. Big E. starts cleaning house with clotheslines and the fans are REALLY not pleased. Cesaro charges into a Rock Bottom (well close enough to one) out of the corner for two. Kidd is sent to the floor for a flip dive from Kofi, followed by Big E. spearing Cesaro through the ropes for a big crash.

It’s Cesaro on his own against both guys but Big E. is sent outside and Kofi gets kicked in the head, setting up a superplex into a springboard elbow from Kidd for a VERY close two. A sunset flip gets two on Kofi with Cesaro holding Kidd in place for a smart move. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Sharpshooter but Big E. makes the save with a belly to belly. Rose gets on the apron and gets kicked in the head, only to have Kidd grab a fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin on Kofi at 11:03.

Rating: B-. Well that worked. This is why having a hot tag division is so important: you can wake up the crowd in a match that really doesn’t matter either way because both teams looked great. New Day could clearly go in the ring but it would still be a few months before they really figured it out. Well that and until they were allowed to have some personality, which was the cure all along.

The opening video is about finding the moment that cements what you are. However, there can only be one. Tonight, someone’s moment becomes a reality. The triple threat gets a little attention as well.

New Age Outlaws vs. Ascension

This is fallout from the Outlaws, the NWO and Acolytes beating down the Ascension for not respecting the veterans enough or something. Yeah it ruined another act that was built up for over a year in NXT but HHH’s buddies got a pay per view appearance out of it. Gunn and Viktor get things going and all it takes is a hiptoss to draw the YOU STILL GOT IT chant. Fans get easier to impress every year. Dogg comes in for the shaky knee drop on Konnor but the young guys take over with a chinlock.

As the match slows down (likely so the Outlaws can breathe), JBL regales us with tales of Bullet Bob Armstrong vs. Buddy Colt. Konnor puts on a chinlock and Dogg taps, likely because tapping out wasn’t a thing when he started. The match keeps going anyway with Dogg avoiding an elbow drop, only to be chinlocked down by Viktor. That goes nowhere and the hot tag brings in Billy to clean house, only to miss the Fameasser and walk into the Fall of Man for the pin at 5:26.

Rating: D. And of course this launched the Ascension up the card and into the Tag Team Title scene forevermore. Yeah of course they never recovered after getting beaten down by a bunch of old retired guys and then winning a meaningless match against a long past retired team because…..yeah I think you know why this didn’t work, or at least you should.

We look at Sting saving Cena from Big Show/Kane/Seth Rollins on Raw. Sting isn’t on the show or anything but he had a cameo there of course. Cena winning however did get Dolph Ziggler, Ryback and Erick Rowan their jobs back but Rowan didn’t qualify for the Rumble. At least the match meant something.

The Authority isn’t pleased with Sting doing that WCW nonsense around here. Cue Paul Heyman who says Brock can help with their problems, whatever those are.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Damien Mizdow/Miz

The Usos are defending but Mizdow is the most over guy in the match. Speaking of things that have changed a lot in a year. The Usos took the titles from Miz/Mizdow to close out 2014 so this is the rematch. Jey and Miz get things going and the fans already want Mizdow. Something like a top rope Demolition Decapitator gets two on Miz as Cole recap Miz trying to get Naomi on their side with promises of Hollywood fame.

Miz gets crotched on top so Mizdow (gently) does the same, continuing the one idea act that somehow had fans cheering for him. Miz’s top rope ax handle is punched out of the air so Mizdow goes up and dives into a punch from no one. The fans think Mizdow is awesome, meaning it’s time for a chinlock from Miz himself. The Reality Check gets two but Miz won’t tag Mizdow in. Again, this doesn’t make a ton of sense as Miz is making himself wrestle the whole match by himself.

Anyway, Jimmy gets away and tags in Jey to take over with the running Umaga Attack in the corner but Miz grabs a DDT for two. Everything breaks down and both Usos hit a dive to take out both challengers, though Jey almost misses Miz, drawing a rather rude chant from the fans.

Back in and Jey misses the Superfly Splash, allowing Miz to get two off the Skull Crushing Finale. The second attempt at the Splash connects but Mizdow breaks it up, drawing the loudest pop you will EVER hear for a heel breaking up a cover. Mizdow’s Skull Crushing Finale gets two on Jimmy, who superkicks Miz into a powerbomb from Jey. Jimmy’s Superfly Splash retains the titles at 9:20.

Rating: C-. Nothing special here as Miz/Mizdow’s one joke is long past its point of interest and we’re just waiting on Mizdow to turn, which would of course take too long to mean anything as WWE would screw it up again. It really is amazing how far the tag division has fallen in just a year as all the injuries and screwiness have turned the division on its head. The Usos are still the Usos though and that’s all that matters.

The pre-show panel chats a bit and we look at the pre-show match.

J&J Security play the new WWE mobile game until Seth Rollins comes in to yell at them for not being serious enough. Rollins says he’s been called the future but he’s the right now.

Wrestlemania ad. I had forgotten how much I hated that theme song.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

No idea what the story here is but I’m sure it’s Total Divas related. Nikki and Paige get things going with Paige not being able to Irish whip her. It’s off to Natalya who gets two off a kick to the back of the head. Brie comes in to work on the arm as the announcers joke about which twin is older. I’m not sure why this is supposed to be funny but they certainly think it is. A double suplex puts Brie down and Paige does her slow, crawling cover for two.

Natalya comes in and covers as well but for some reason she isn’t legal. Even Paige is confused as she grabs Brie again and now tags Natalya in all legal like. Brie gets two off a quick slam and it’s back to Nikki for a Hennig neck snap. Lawler: “Name two countries and then a state.” Cole: “It was a joke.” It’s as random as it sounds. Now it’s off to Lawler approving of the Bellas’ looks as they take turns on Natalya for some near falls.

Brie puts on a chinlock for a bit before both Bellas grab a leg and roll forward to flip Natalya onto the back of her head. Nikki puts on a headscissors and does push-ups to drive Natalya’s face mere inches away from the mat. Natalya powers up and drops Nikki on her back for the break and avoids a clothesline, only to have Brie pull Paige off the apron. Nikki’s big forearm puts Natalya away at 8:02.

Rating: D. We don’t even have time for a hot tag? This wasn’t much to see but again, it’s all about the Bellas because they’re the stars on Total Divas and know how to act like the Kardashians or whatever. Nikki would get a lot better after another six months on top of the division or so, but that would be a very long six months.

Roman Reigns says he’ll beat his performance from last year.

Stardust does his usual and Goldust says he’s right.

Rusev says he’ll win and promises to crush whoever wins.

Miz says this is his year and Mizdow repeats everything. Again: that’s not what a stunt double does.

Big Show says he’s not mortal because he’s a giant.

Fandango says no one understands the power of the tango.

YES, Daniel Bryan thinks he can get back to the main event of Wrestlemania.

We recap the triple threat for the World Title. Rollins tried to cash in Money in the Bank on Lesnar at Night of Champions while Cena was challenging, triggering a feud between Rollins and Cena. Tonight they both get their shot in what should be awesome.

WWE World Title: John Cena vs. Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar is defending and this is one fall to a finish. The fans just explode on Cena with the JOHN CENA SUCKS song making its return. I was there when it debuted and that’s a pure thing of brilliance. Lesnar on the other hand is treated…..well about how you would expect Philadelphia to react to him. Rollins bails to start and there’s the first German suplex to Cena. Another one drops Cena again so J&J come in, only to get a German of their own.

Rollins kicks Cena in the head but gets pulled inside to face Brock all alone. It’s time for more German suplexes and the fans loudly applaud. There’s a regular suplex to Rollins and we get an ECW chant. Brock grabs a Kimura on Cena but John lifts him up, allowing Seth to springboard in with a knee to the champ. Cena and Rollins get smart and double team Lesnar, only to have Seth throw John to the floor for one off an AA.

Brock pops up like a daisy and sends both of them outside, only to have Rollins knock him into the steps. As J&J are in a heap next to the barricade, Cena starts his usual finishing sequence on Rollins but Lesnar breaks up the Shuffle with another German suplex. Seth breaks up the rolling Germans though as he needs Cena to help fight against Brock. Makes sense. A knee to the back puts Brock on the floor but the champ is right back in for the save as Seth covers Cena.

Back up and Cena throws Rollins to the floor and actually drops Brock with some clotheslines. Seth pulls Cena outside and tries a springboard, only to get caught in a big F5. That is some terrifying strength. Brock loads up a table for some reason so Cena gives him three straight AA’s for two with Rollins making a last second save. There’s a Curb Stomp from Seth and this time Cena has to dive in and break up the cover. The fans think this is awesome (indeed) as everyone heads outside, where Cena spears Lesnar through the barricade.

Brock keeps getting up so Cena throws him into the steps and blasts him in the face for good measure, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Rollins feels left out so he drives Brock through with a HUGE top rope elbow and Cena is the only one standing. The non-Lesnars head back inside and Seth hits a quick low superkick for two. The AA doesn’t work so Cena Batista Bombs him for a VERY near fall.

Not to be outdone, Rollins reverses a superplex attempt into a running Buckle Bomb for two more. Both guys are spent so Rollins tries a Curb Stomp, only to get caught in the STF. Cue J&J from their comas for the save as a stretcher comes out for Brock. There’s a TripleBomb for two on Cena but he ducks a briefcase shot and AA’s both J’s at the same time. He should not be able to do that twenty minutes into a match this physical. Or any match for that matter.

Another AA gets two on Rollins and the Curb Stomp gets the same on Cena as the fans are freaking out on these kickouts. We’re told Brock has at least a broken rib as Rollins busts out the Phoenix Splash on Cena. Not that it matters as a TICKED OFF Brock gets back in for some German suplexes, only to have Seth hit him in the face with the briefcase. Rollins loads up a Curb Stomp onto the case but you don’t try that on Lesnar, as he counters with a HUGE F5 to retain at 22:42.

Rating: A. Good grief what a battle. This was the night where Rollins became a star and people knew that he was going to be champion soon. Cena put in his normal amazing performance here as well, but good night Brock looked like a monster. This is the beast that WWE wanted to build up for someone to take down and it worked perfectly here. Just outstanding action here with all three looking like they had been through a war. This was the instant match of the year leader and it would take something special to knock it off.

Brock walks off as the medics are stunned.

Rumble By The Numbers video.

Royal Rumble

Good luck following that. Miz is #1 and R-Truth is #2 with 90 second intervals. They start slowly (smart here) until Truth gets in a few pelvic thrusts. Truth is sent to the apron a few times and gets crotched on the top until Bubba Ray Dudley makes a big surprise return at #3. You think that might wake the Philadelphia fans up a bit? Bubba is fired up to start and gives Miz the Dusty punches before R-Truth plays D-Von (I’m not touching that one) on What’s Up.

Now it’s table time but Miz gets up, only to be put back down with a 3D. There go Miz and Truth as Luke Harper is in at #4 for a hoss fight. They slug it out boo/yay style but Harper elbows out of a Bubba Bomb. A big clothesline drops Harper but Bray Wyatt is in at #5. Bubba isn’t sure what to make of him and Bray does his big freaky smile. The fans want D-Von (fair enough idea) but Bray sends Bubba into a clothesline and dumps him a few seconds later.

Harper and Wyatt stare at each other and Curtis Axel is in at #6, only to have Erick Rowan jump him from behind and destroy him, kicking off Axelmania because Axel was never officially eliminated. Rowan (not part of the Family at this point) gets in and teases a reunion against Bray, only to be quickly double teamed. Erick almost gets Harper out but Bray dumps them both and points to the sign. In another surprise return, the Boogeyman is in at #7. Cole: “It’s the eater of worlds against the eater of worms!” His entrance takes forever and Bray dumps him like the jobber that he is.

Sin Cara is in at #8 and gets in a few shots, only to get punched out of the air. Sister Abigail sets up another elimination and Bray is on a roll. With no one to fight, Bray grabs a mic and issues an open challenge to everyone in the back because this is his year. It’s time to sing until Zack Ryder is in at #9 (apparently returning from shoulder surgery), only to be eliminated even faster than Cara.

NOW things get interesting as Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to one of the loudest reactions you’ll hear since…..well since the last time Bryan was in a big match probably. Daniel speeds things up a lot with some running dropkicks in the corner as JBL tells Bryan not to go so hard because he needs to pace himself. Preach it JBL. A middle rope hurricanrana puts Bray down and it’s Fandango in at #11. Well that’s quite the drop in star power. He goes after Bryan but stops to dance, allowing Bryan to flip out of a belly to back suplex.

We go old school (way old school actually) with an airplane spin until Tyson Kidd (with his sweet theme song) is in at #12. A springboard missile dropkick drops Bryan and Fandango is quickly dropped into the corner, leaving Kidd and Bryan to slug it out in what could rock with about fifteen minutes. Stardust is in at #13, with Cole saying it’s his Rumble debut. No Cole, no it’s not. I get what he’s going for and no Cole, no it’s not.

Fandango and Stardust take turns skinning the cat before Stardust takes out the knee to get Fandango in trouble. Bryan eliminates Kidd but Bray is back up, only to be knocked through the ropes and out to the floor. You know that means a suicide dive from Daniel, followed by Diamond Dallas Page in at #14 for another surprise. Stardust is right on him but there’s the first Diamond Cutter. JBL: “Do they teach that in yoga class?”

Fandango takes Page down but gets crotched on top, setting up a super Diamond Cutter for a very nice pop. Bray pounds on Page but takes a Diamond Cutter of his own, which is one step too far. The guy is a monster and shouldn’t get dropped by a retired legend. Rusev comes in at #15 and superkicks Page before eliminating him. Side note: put Page in the Hall of Fame already. He has the resume and he’s worthy of canonization after what he accomplished with Roberts and Hall.

Rusev dumps Fandango and puts Bryan on the apron, allowing Bray to knock Daniel out. That right there is pretty much it for this Rumble meaning anything as we now know it’s all about Reigns, even though the fans aren’t going to be interested no matter what. I know you can’t have Bryan win here, but you could at least give him a run near the end. This was a bad idea and the DANIEL BRYAN chants starting up a minute after he’s gone don’t bode well for the rest of the show.

Goldust is in at #16, giving us Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. The brothers go after each other for a bit until Kofi Kingston is in at #17. Kofi goes after Bray as the fans are booing everything presented to them no matter how watchable it is. All five wind up in one corner for some reason with no eliminations until Adam Rose is in at #18. The Rosebuds do the full entrance and catch Kofi as he’s launched over the top for his annual save. Rusev dumps Rose with ease and kicks Kofi out a few seconds later to get us back to four. Roman Reigns is in at #19 and oh man this is going to be good.

The fans go nuts on Reigns as he fires off the running corner clotheslines and gets rid of Goldust and Stardust in rapid succession. Big E. is in at #20 and only gets kind of booed. Rusev is right on him and that gets booed loudly out of pure spite. Rusev hits a quick Cannonball on Big E. and it’s Damien Mizdow in at #21 for a bit of relief from the fans. Miz cuts him off and wants the spot but Reigns shoves him down and Damien, egged on by the crowd, goes in as well.

Mizdow cleans some house but is thrown out by Rusev in less than twenty seconds. Dang they really don’t want the fans to cheer anything tonight do they? Well other than Reigns of course. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and gets in a few nice shots until Bray cuts him off. We’ve got Wyatt, Swagger, Reigns, Big E. and Rusev at the moment until Ryback is in at #23. That means more power brawling with Meat Hooks and suplexes all around. Bray and Rusev continue their loose alliance to to get Ryback in trouble and there’s a CM Punk chant for the latest false hope.

Kane is in at #24 and you know the people aren’t happy with that. The match slows down a bit with Kane putting Ryback on the apron and Big E. doing the same thing to Swagger. Those attempts go as far as you would expect and it’s Dean Ambrose in at #25 to give the fans something to actually cheer for. Dean goes for Rusev to start but has to stop a charging Kane. The fans are WAY into Ambrose as he’s the first guy they’ve wanted to cheer for in about fifteen minutes.

Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and put out in four seconds by Ambrose and Reigns. So much for that one. The ring is getting too full and Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett makes it even worse at lucky #27. Everyone brawls against the ropes until it’s Cesaro in at #28. Cesaro fires off a bunch of European uppercuts but he can only get Ambrose to the apron. Rusev dropkicks Big E. out to clear a little room but Big Show takes his place at #29.

Everyone goes after him but Show throws them away before starting a chokeslam contest with Kane. There goes Ryback thanks to both giants and Show dumps Swagger. A chokeslam sends Rusev rolling out under the ropes and it’s Dolph Ziggler in at #30 (Remember when “who is #30” was the big question every year? Now it’s just another entrant. It’s kind of sad really.), giving us a final grouping of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler.

Here’s the thing: that’s actually a stacked final set of people. Wyatt, Rusev, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro and Ziggler are crowd favorites, Big Show and Kane are at least good monsters to conquer and Reigns is…..well that other group is really popular. The problem here is NO ONE but Reigns has a chance and the entire audience knows it, making this inevitable rather than anything interesting.

Ziggler superkicks the giants and takes them both down with the running DDT. Barrett is sent to the apron and superkicked out but Ziggler gets caught in the Cesaro Swing. Cesaro sends him to the apron but Dolph gets him to the apron for a superkick and an elimination, only to have Big Show and Kane put Ziggler out. That also gives Kane the all time record for Rumble eliminations.

The giants throw Bray out like he’s no one (thanks for the 47 minutes Bray) and the fans are getting even angrier than they already were. So it’s Ambrose/Reigns vs. Big Show/Kane with Rusev forgotten on the floor. Roman is bleeding from the mouth as he clotheslines Show down but he and Dean can’t get rid of the bigger giant. Kane boots Roman in the face and the KO Punch knocks Dean silly, giving the giants an easy elimination. Reigns is suddenly even less popular as the inevitability gets that much closer. Even Cole acknowledges that the fans hate this.

Reigns fights back and the booing gets even louder until Kane and Show start fighting, because the last SIXTEEN YEARS of these two fighting isn’t enough. They fight next to the ropes and Reigns gets up for a double elimination, actually sending the fans into silence for the win.

Kane and Big Show get back in and beat Roman down even more, complete with a double chokeslam. The fans remember that Rusev is still in but here’s the Rock to help save his cousin. He cleans house and drops both giants to a nice reaction until Reigns Superman Punches Show into a Rock Bottom. Rock leaves and Rusev gets back in, only to get speared and eliminated to really give Roman the win at 59:31.

Rating: D-. WOW. This is somehow so much worse than I remember it as WWE was clearly going out of its way to clear the path for Roman but the fans were having none of it. The problem here is a simple one: there was never any drama. Look back at 2012 for a second. The final two were Chris Jericho and Sheamus, neither of whom were interesting choices to win. However, the final three minutes of that match are AWESOME as you really didn’t know who was going to win and both guys had a real chance. That’s the easiest way to get fans to like the Rumble, or really most matches.

This Rumble is really more like 1993 than anything else. That was the year of Yokozuna and everyone knew it, though there was the slightest chance of the Undertaker winning it. However, Undertaker went out in the middle of the match and the rest was just a waiting game to see who was on Yokozuna’s victim list.

That’s exactly what happened here. Everyone knew Reigns was the heavy favorite no matter who they wanted to win and the ONLY person with a real chance of beating him was Bryan. This year Bryan was the twelfth man eliminated, leaving about thirty five minutes left in the match. That’s a long time for the fans to sit around with little to no hope as things get worse and worse. The best false hope they had for the rest of the match was Ambrose and that just wasn’t going to happen.

On top of that, you have Big Show and Kane as the big bads for Reigns to conquer. That’s fine on paper, until you look at all the papers labeled “Raw Results” where you see how many times he and everyone else has beaten both of them. Instead of some group of the popular guys at the end, it was Kane and Big Show for the first ending. Then there’s Rusev for the false hope spot but Reigns destroyed him too before winning.

So yeah, this was one big mess all designed for Reigns to look like a hero and it failed miserably. It boils down to a simple concept that actually takes me back to the Russo days to a degree: you have to earn it. The problem here is Reigns hasn’t really accomplished anything to earn this spot and the fans are rejecting him. Austin dominating the 1998 Rumble worked because the fans had seen Austin go through a lot of wars to earn the right to be the top dog. Reigns’ big moment was a win over Randy Orton at Summerslam 2014. That’s not exactly huge and the fans hadn’t forgotten.

Ignoring the Reigns part for a minute, this was a really dull match. Bubba was a cool surprise and Page was good for a Diamond Cutter, but Boogeyman? Other than that and Bray’s dominance (which went nowhere), this was really dull stuff. Kofi being caught by the Rosebuds was a good quick chuckle but really low on his list of saves. Just a horrible Rumble from start to finish with only a few bright spots throughout.

Rock poses with Reigns and the fans STILL boo. The Authority comes out to glare a lot as Reigns celebrates and points at the sign to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Oh yeah this was bad. The triple threat is the only thing keeping this from being a disaster as the rest of the card is a bunch of nothing tags and then a disaster of a Rumble for the last third. The Rumble itself really is that bad and drags an already bad show down even lower. It’s balanced out a bit by the triple threat but twenty two minutes of awesome can’t make up for an hour of horrible. Terrible show here and thankfully WWE finally figured out that Reigns wasn’t ready yet, because he just wasn’t here.

Ratings Comparison

Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. New Day

Original: B

Redo: B-

Ascension vs. New Age Outlaws

Original: D+

Redo: D

Miz/Damien Mizdow vs. Usos

Original: C-

Redo: C-

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

Original: D-

Redo: D

Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Original: A

Redo: A

Royal Rumble

Original: D+

Redo: D-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: D

How in the world did I add that one up last year?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/01/25/royal-rumble-2015-more-teasing-than-a-15-year-old-on-prom-night/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2015 (Original): The Ringing Endorsement

Royal Rumble 2015
Date: January 25, 2015
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the start of the Road to Wrestlemania and the top two contenders to challenge for the title at the biggest show of the year are Roman Reigns and Daniel Bryan. Both are in the Royal Rumble match tonight and there really isn’t another major favorite to win. Other than that we have John Cena and Seth Rollins challenging Brock Lesnar for the WWE World Title in a triple threat. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: New Day vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

This was originally a six man elimination tag with Adam Rose and Xavier Woods added. They may have been dropped due to Woods’ ankle injury. The fans are entirely behind Cesaro to start as Big E. throws Kidd around. Some backbreakers get two on Kidd before Big E. launches Kidd into the air for a dropkick from Kofi. Off to Cesaro and the fans are thrilled. Big E. comes back in and hammers away on Cesaro, much to the crowd’s chagrin. Oh yeah they’re white hot tonight.

Kofi is dragged into the wrong corner for a double stomp with Kidd going much faster than his partner. Cesaro won’t let Kofi tag but he does roll the Swiss man up for two. The Cesaro Swing into the dropkick gets two and we take a break. Back with Cesaro holding Kofi in a chinlock as the fans think New Day sucks. Big E. gets all fired up and wipes the sweat from his brow before slamming Cesaro down for two. Kidd is sent outside and Big E. launches Kofi onto him to almost no reaction. Big E. spears Cesaro through the ropes and off the apron to the floor. I miss that spot. Or any Big E. spot actually.

The referee doesn’t see a tag to Kofi at first but Cesaro backdrops Big E. over the top for a big crash. Cesaro superplexes Kofi for a springboard elbow from Kidd for a very close two. Kofi kicks Kidd to the floor to break up a Sharpshooter attempt but Cesaro gets caught cheating on a sunset flip attempt. Trouble in Paradise is countered into the Sharpshooter on Kofi but Big E. makes the save with a belly to belly. Cesaro knocks the big man to the floor and pops Kofi in the face with a European uppercut, setting up a swinging fisherman’s neckbreaker for the pin on Kofi at 11:00.

Rating: B. This got a lot better near the end but the match and commentary really tells you everything you need to know about the tag division at this point. With that one win, after about five losses, JBL thinks Cesaro and Kidd are in line for a title shot. Have we really sunk that low again? Win two matches and you should be the Tag Team Champions? Yet people still don’t want Ascension around? The near falls here were good and I wasn’t sure who was winning until the end, but that’s the first loss for New Day? Really?

The opening video talks about wanting to have your moment and being the one. We transition into a video on the triple threat and how everyone is fighting for the title.

New Age Outlaws vs. Ascension

Ascension needs some steps to come down during their entrance. Cole points out that this isn’t for the Tag Team Titles. That could be because neither team is champions. The fans think Billy still has it as he armdrags Viktor down. Off to Dogg vs. Konnor with the big man driving Dogg into the corner. Viktor’s chinlock doesn’t have much effect so it’s off to Konnor for one of his own. Dogg finally gets up and dives over for the tag to Billy as everything speeds up. The Fameasser misses though and Fall of Man ends Gunn at 5:23.

Rating: D+. This was exactly what it was supposed to be as they’re setting up Ascension against various legendary teams, meaning we’re likely to see Too Cool and maybe the APA laying down for them in the future, setting up the title showdown against Ascension. Granted it’s not like beating the New Age Outlaws means much at this point.

We recap Sting debuting on Raw and staring down the Authority, allowing Cena to pin Rollins to save his spot in the title match tonight and get Dolph Ziggler, Erick Rowan and Ryback their jobs back.

HHH and Stephanie are annoyed that they weren’t told about Sting debuting. If he walks in here again, HHH is going to destroy him. Heyman comes in and the ECW chants begin. His solution to the Sting problem: Brock Lesnar.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Miz/Damien Mizdow

The Usos are defending and these teams have been trading the titles for the last few months. Mizdow is just ridiculously over. Miz shoves Jimmy into the corner but eats a shot to the face. The corner clothesline puts Jey down but he’s able to crotch Miz on the top. Mizdow does the same but in slow motion for a funny bit. He one ups it by diving into an invisible punch to the ribs before Miz throws Jimmy throat first into the ropes. The Reality Check gets two but Miz still won’t tag out.

The not very hot tag brings in Jey but Miz takes him down for the figure four as everything breaks down. Miz and Mizdow head outside and Jimmy dives on Mizdown with Jey taking out Miz a few seconds later. Back in and Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale for two on Jimmy. Jey comes back in for a double superkick and the Superfly Splash but Mizdow makes the save. He follows it up with the Skull Crushing Finale to give Miz two on Jey. Miz’s superplex attempt is broken up for a sunset bomb from Jey, followed by the Superfly Splash from Jimmy to retain at 8:22. Mizdow didn’t seem interested in making the save.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here as these teams have run out of things to do to each other. Miz and Mizdow’s split seems imminent and I can’t imagine they make it out of the Rumble without a major showdown. It wasn’t a great match though and they would have been better off with this on the pre-show and the New Day vs. Kidd/Cesaro on the main show.

The expert panel (Booker T., Corey Graves and Alex Riley) talk about the show so far.

We look at the pre-show match.

The Stooges are playing the new WWE Immortals game when Seth Rollins comes in to ask why they’re not helping him get ready. He’s tired of being called the future and wants to be the present.

Bella Twins vs. Paige/Natalya

This is the Total Divas match over who are the real stars of the show. Paige throws Nikki down to start as JBL says the Bellas have been twins their whole life. Off to Brie who walks into a double suplex, allowing the slow crawling cover from Paige. Natalya comes back in and slams Brie down before the Bellas start choking to take over.

The Brie Mode running knee to the chest gets two but Natalya fights out of a headscissors by lifting Nikki into an electric chair. Nikki misses a clothesline in the corner but Brie breaks up the hot tag to Paige. A big forearm to Natalya’s jaw is enough for the pin at 8:06 to end this far too long match.

Rating: D-. Oh come on now. A FOREARM??? They can’t even have Nikki hit her finisher for the pin? If you’re going to have Nikki pin Natalya, at least make this a title match. Oh wait that would be stupid because we’ve seen that match like 19 times now. Again, stop running through matches and save them for shows like this.

Roman Reigns says last year’s elimination record was cool but it’s nothing compared to this.

Stardust talks about the Cosmic Key and Goldust breathes a lot.

Rusev will crush everyone at Wrestlemania.

Miz says he’ll win and Mizdow agrees, but accidentally says he’ll win instead.

Big Show says he’s an angry and motivated giant. Roman Reigns and everyone else in the match will find that out for real.

Fandango says everyone underestimates the power of the tango.

Daniel Bryan thinks he can make it back to the main event of Wrestlemania this year. YES he does.

We recap Lesnar vs. Cena vs. Rollins. Cena had defeated Orton to earn a title shot against Lesnar but the Authority added Rollins to the match to thank him for bringing them back. Rollins has started to stand up to Lesnar and even Curb Stomped him, meaning Lesnar wants to kill him too.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena vs. Seth Rollins

Lesnar is defending and we get big match intros. Rollins immediately bails to the floor and Lesnar hits the first German suplex on Cena. There’s the second German as Rollins comes in, only to get caught on Brock’s shoulders. The Stooges make the save so Brock suplexes them at the same time. Brock launches Seth back into the ring and Germans Cena again. All Lesnar so far.

Both challengers are easily suplexed again and there’s the Kimura to Cena. Brock even climbs onto Cena but Seth makes the save with the springboard knee to the head and Lesnar is in trouble. A double suplex puts Lesnar down and there’s an AA but Rollins throws Cena to the floor and only gets one on the champ. Both challengers are thrown to the floor and you can see everyone laying as Brock walks around the ring. Seth knocks Brock into the steps for a breather, leaving Cena to beat Rollins up inside.

The fans absolutely hate Cena, only to have Brock break up the Shuffle with rolling Germans. Rollins breaks it up for some reason though and knees Lesnar out to the floor. Now it’s Cena getting all fired up and cleaning house, only to have Rollins knock him outside. Seth tries a springboard onto Lesnar, only to get caught on Brock’s shoulders for an F5. John has to make a save so Brock feels the need to throw him down with another German suplex.

That’s not enough for Brock though as he loads up the announcers’ table (and destroys a monitor), only to walk into the AA. Brock doesn’t even stay down so Cena hits another, only to have Lesnar pop up again. A third AA gets two as Rollins makes the save, followed by the Curb Stomp for two with Cena making a save. Now the fans are impressed. Lesnar throws them both down again and goes outside, only to have Cena follow him out and spear the champ through the barricade.

Cena slams him hard into the steps and blasts him in the face with the same steps, knocking the champ onto the announcers’ table. Seth kicks Cena down and goes up for a top rope elbow through the table to put everyone down. That was one heck of a crash as the war continues. Back in and Rollins hits the low superkick for two on Cena but John grabs a popup sitout powerbomb for the same. Lesnar is receiving medical attention as Rollins counters a superplex attempt into the running buckle bomb for two.

Everyone is down again but Cena grabs the STF, only to have the Stooges come in for the save. Rollins plays Reigns in a Triple Bomb as a stretcher comes out for Lesnar. Cena kicks out at two so Rollins grabs the briefcase, only to miss the charge and fly out to the floor. The Stooges take a double AA and Rollins gets the single version but kicks out at two. We cut back to Lesnar who says he wants to stay out here. Cole says Lesnar has at least a broken rib. Rollins enziguris Cena down and the Curb Stomp connects for another near fall.

Rollins busts out a Phoenix Splash but Lesnar CHARGES back in for some German suplexes as Beast Mode is on. Seth flips out of a German though and knocks Lesnar silly with the briefcase, only to have Lesnar pop up with an F5 to counter the Curb Stomp onto the briefcase to retain the title at 22:45.

Rating: A. If there’s one thing WWE can do like no one else, it’s organized carnage. These guys DESTROYED each other for twenty two minutes and I would have believed anyone could have won at any time. Lesnar going into that other level is absolutely terrifying and you believe he could beat anyone at that point. Great stuff here and well worth going out of your way to see. They’re making Lesnar out to be unstoppable, meaning whoever gets to take the title off of him will be a huge star. You might even say they’ll be Reign(s)ing. And yes that was as stupid as it sounded.

Rumble by the numbers.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals and it’s Miz at #1 and R-Truth at #2. The fans immediately want Mizdow but get a headlock from R-Truth instead. Feeling out process to start until Truth gets crotched on top. In at #3 is BUBBA RAY DUDLEY, complete with taped up glasses. It’s Miz getting the big beating and the wind-up elbow has Miz reeling. Truth (appropriately) helps with What’s Up and is even told to get the tables. You know the Philadelphia crowd is up for that. Miz gets back up and eats 3D, allowing Bubba to easily eliminate him.

Luke Harper is in at #4 as Bubba throws out Truth. They immediately start hammering on each other and Harper fights out of the Bubba Bomb before kicking Bubba in the jaw. A big lariat puts Harper down though and the ECW chants revive Dudley. Bray Wyatt is in at #5, complete with lantern. Bubba stares him down but Harper gives us a Wyatt Family reunion as the fans want D-Von. Harper throws Bubba out and it’s time for the big staredown.

They stand in place until Curtis Axel is in at #6 but Erick Rowan (who didn’t qualify for the Rumble) jumps him from behind though and whips him into the barricade, apparently stealing Axel’s spot. Harper looks at Rowan and wants a team up, much to Bray’s excitement. Bray and Harper join forces though and Rowan gets double teamed, only to have Bray dump both of them out to clear the ring.

The Boogeyman returns at #7 and Cole informs us that the guy coming out to I’M THE BOOGEYMAN is in fact named the Boogeyman. Bray smiles at him and stops a charge with a big clothesline, setting up the easy elimination. Sin Cara is in at #8 and Cole sounds bored out of his mind. Cara gets in a kick from the apron but Bray just decks him with a right hand. Sister Abigail connects and Bray is all alone again a few seconds later.

Bray grabs the mic and issues an open invitation because he has the whole world in his hands. Zack Ryder returns at #9, hits the Broski Boot, and is quickly Bray’s fifth elimination. Daniel Bryan is in at #10 to really pick things up. He immediately starts the kicks and has Bray in trouble in the corner. Even more kicks put him down as Fandango is in at #11. Bryan busts out even more kicks and an old school airplane spin but doesn’t throw Fandango out.

Tyson Kidd (complete with his addictive theme song) is in at #12 to slug it out with Bryan before a double cross body puts both guys down. Stardust is in at #13 as we’re firmly in the midcard portion. Cole says this is Stardust’s first Rumble to split a few hairs. We currently have Wyatt, Bryan, Stardust, Fandango and Kidd in the ring. Stardust and Fandango trade skinning the cat saves before Bryan belly to back suplexes Kidd out.

Bray gets knocked through the middle rope and Bryan follows with the Flying Goat, meaning both guys are still in as Diamond Dallas Page is in at #14. Stardust jumps him upon entry but eats a Diamond Cutter. Fandango takes the middle rope version, followed by Wyatt missing a charge and taking one of his own. Rusev is in at #15 and it’s time to clear out some space. He blocks a Diamond Cutter and dumps Page and Fandango, setting up a showdown between Rusev and Wyatt.

Daniel breaks it up with a top rope dropkick and unleashes more kicks, only to have Bray pop up and dump him out far earlier than I was expecting. Goldust is in at #16 as the crowd is just dead. Stardust tries to throw out Goldust (with Cole mentioning that Goldust was eliminated by his brother last year, despite saying Stardust was in his first Rumble. Like I said, splitting hairs) but Goldust saves himself. The fans start chanting for Bryan and them switch to booing.

Kofi Kingston is in at #17, giving us Kingston, Goldust, Stardust, Rusev and Wyatt. Bray catapults him over the top but Kofi skins the cat and comes back in with a springboard shot to the head. Everyone gets into one corner until Adam Rose is in at #18. You can hear every word of the songs now as the crowd just does not care at the moment. Kofi is thrown out but the Rosebuds catch him and walk him back to the apron. Rusev dumps Rose and Kofi a few seconds later and Roman Reigns is in at #19 to a lot less booing than I was expecting.

Roman starts cleaning house and dumps both Dust Brothers, only to get double teamed by Rusev and Wyatt. Big E. is in at #20 to clean house and give us a very powerful foursome of Big E., Rusev, Wyatt and Reigns. Mizdow is in at #21 but Miz runs out to say it’s his spot. Damien finally stands up to Miz and goes in to a good reaction, only to be dumped by Rusev. Jack Swagger is in at #22 and everyone keeps brawling until Ryback is in at #23.

Ryback busts out everyone with spinebusters as JBL incorrectly says Lex Luger is the only man to win the Rumble but never win the WWE Title (Duggan). The fans chant for CM Punk but get Kane at #24, giving us Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Big E., Swagger, Ryback and Kane. Dean Ambrose wakes the crowd up again at #25 and goes right for Wyatt. We get more brawling around the ropes until Titus O’Neil is in at #26 and is dumped in about thirty seconds (counting intro) by Reigns and Rusev.

Ambrose dropkicks Wyatt up against the ropes and Bad News Barrett gets lucky #27. The ring is getting full but no one is in any real danger of being eliminated. Cesaro is in at #28 and joins the fray. Rusev sends Big E. to the apron and then kicks him out to clear the ring a bit. Big Show is in at #29 and everyone stops to stare him down. They all gang up on him but Show shoves everyone down as Kane chokeslams Ambrose. Show does the same to Reigns before the monsters dump Ryback with ease.

Swagger is dumped by the power team as well, tying Kane for the all time record at 39 eliminations. Dolph Ziggler is in at #30, giving us a final group of Wyatt, Rusev, Reigns, Kane, Ambrose, Barrett, Cesaro, Big Show and Ziggler. Dolph has to fight out of the chokeslam from Big Show and dumps Barrett. Cesaro swings Dolph around and gets him to the apron, only to be pulled out for the elimination. Ziggler goes up top and dives right into the KO Punch, allowing Kane and Show to easily dump him, giving Kane the all time eliminations record.

Big Show KO’s Wyatt and dumps him as well, leaving us with Ambrose, Reigns, Big Show and Kane as the final four. Reigns is bleeding from the side of the mouth as the brawl is on. The Shield fights out of a double chokeslam but Ambrose’s rebound clothesline has almost no effect on Show. Reigns knocks Show down and the fans just are not happy. Big Show and Kane double team Roman though before a chokeslam is enough to get rid of Ambrose.

So it’s Kane and Big Show vs. Reigns and the fans are LIVID. Reigns gets sent to the apron but Show tries to dump Kane, triggering a fight that has been going on for over fifteen years now. Reigns sneaks up from behind them and eliminates both guys to go to Wrestlemania at 57:23.

Rating: D+. I’m surprised by this but I really shouldn’t be. They actually went with Reigns vs. the giants to end the Royal Rumble? This match felt like a big tease from the company as they were setting up Wyatt, Cesaro, Rusev, Ambrose and Ziggler for this big showdown but then snatched it away to go with Kane and Big Show as the big monsters. That’s really what they think is the smart idea? And you know we’re getting Reigns vs. Big Show at Fast Lane, probably without Big Show doing a job for him because he doesn’t get pinned you see.

As for the rest of the match…..yeah I liked it, but man alive it was obvious where they were going with about twenty minutes to go. Bryan going out that early is a waste, though I’m fine with him not winning it. He had his big moment last year and it would be foolish to try and recreate it. Bryan can get the title later on in his other big moment and that’s all he needs to do.

The returns were fine but there was no big surprise at the end (that’s fine), and Reigns was just so obvious as a winner. Also, the commentary was getting REALLY annoying with all their stats, some of which just didn’t make sense. I didn’t hate this match, but Reigns is getting wedged into a spot he’s just not ready for whatsoever. Wrestlemania better have an amazing undercard, because Reigns vs. Lesnar is not going to cut it on top.

Post match Kane and Big Show destroy Reigns until The Rock makes a surprise run in for the save. House is cleaned but Rusev is back in! He was never officially elimianted…..so Reigns throws him out to officially win about three minutes after he won in the first place. Again, more teasing.

The Authority comes out as Rock poses with Reigns before letting Reigns point at the sign to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This could have been far worse and the Rumble isn’t even very bad, but good grief it felt like they looked at all the cool possibilities they had here and ran away from them as fast as they could to go with the status quo. The World Title match more than saves the show and the Rumble has its moments (some of them at least), but that last ten minutes or so just crippled anything they possibly had out of this match. I actually liked last year’s Rumble better if you can believe that. Just……stop deciding your outcome before you think for two seconds WWE. It would make your fans so much happier.

I’m not even mad at this ending. It’s just…there. WWE decided months ago that Reigns was going to be the guy because of whatever reasons they have and that’s what we’re getting, no matter what else is out there. It’s very dull when you know what’s coming and there’s nothing you can do about it. I can live with that when there’s no better option, but there are indeed better, or at least far more interesting and prepared options, than Reigns here.

Results

Ascension b. New Age Outlaws – Fall of Man to Gunn

Usos b. Miz/Damien Mizdow – Superfly Splash to Miz

Bella Twins b. Paige/Natalya – Forearm to the face

Brock Lesnar b. Seth Rollins and John Cena – F5 to Rollins

Roman Reigns won the Royal Rumble last eliminating Big Show and Kane

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2010 (2013 Redo): Dang That’s A Cool Poster

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 16,697
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker

We’re getting close to the end of the run here with only three shows left. Tonight we’ve got the Rumble of course along with Undertaker defending against Mysterio and Sheamus defending against Orton. I remember really liking this one as the new generation had arrived and was rising up the card. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the Road to Wrestlemania is beginning and how it determines what happens for months to come. This is called the most star studded Rumble ever, which is a tagline that has been used before.

ECW Title: Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Christian is defending and man that ECW ring announcer has an annoying voice. Regal is with Jackson here. According to Striker, Jackson went to Columbia Law School. Now there’s a factoid that fell through the cracks. Jackson shoves Christian into the corner and then does it again into the ropes so the champion slaps him in the face. After a brief chase, Christian dropkicks Jackson out to the floor.

The springboard plancha takes Jackson out and we head back in. Christian finally gets caught in the corner and pounded on before having the Killswitch easily blocked. Instead Christian chokes away on the ropes and hits another shot to the face. Jackson throws Christian to the floor where Regal tries to throw him back in, earning himself an ejection. Off to a neck crank back inside which Jackson picks up into a kind of cobra clutch slam for two.

A vertical suplex gets two for Big Zeke and it’s time for more choking. A sunset flip is easily blocked by Jackson and it’s back to the chinlock. Striker tries to figure out what a peep is, as he knows it as a something made of chocolate. Some shots to the face get Christian out of trouble for awhile, or at least until a clothesline to the back of the head gets two.

Jackson hooks both of Christian’s arms back for another hold before putting the champion on top. The superplex is blocked and Christian hits a top rope back elbow for two (LOVE that move). Jackson’s big clothesline misses and a middle rope dropkick gets two for the champion. A spinwheel kick gets two on Jackson but a swan dive misses and gives Zeke a near fall as does a backbreaker.

The tornado DDT gets ANOTHER two for Christian so Jackson takes his head off with a clothesline. Off to a sleeper from Christian when the Killswitch doesn’t work but Jackson counters into a powerslam position to ram Christian’s back into the buckle. Christian slides down Jackson’s back and grabs the Killswitch out of nowhere to retain.

Rating: C+. Trim two minutes out of this and it goes WAY up in quality. The period of near falls went on too long without getting any significant heat from the crowd. Jackson would get the title in a little over two weeks on the final episode of ECW because if there’s one man that should be the final ECW Champion, it’s a musclehead that could barely get through a five minute match most of the time.

Cryme Tyme come in to try to get a second spot in the Rumble from Teddy and Tiffany. Khali says “no dice homeslice” to selling their spot because he’s keeping it real. Apparently he’s learned his English from Family Matters (Singh’s words, not mine). Ok then. Anyway US Champion the Miz comes in and laughs which causes him to have to defend against MVP.

Orton is in the back when Cody Rhodes comes in. He’s there for Randy in the title match tonight but that’s not all. Apparently DiBiase isn’t in on this because his mind is on winning the Rumble and taking the title from Orton.

US Title: The Miz vs. MVP

A quick clothesline gets two for MVP and he works on the champ’s ribs to start. Miz gets a boot up in the corner to slow him down but MVP comes right back with a belly to back suplex for two. They head to the floor for this gem from Striker: “Miz is one of the most recognizable faces on this planet.” I don’t think Miz is one of the most recognizable faces in this match.

Back in and Miz sends MVP to the apron and gets kicked into the table on the floor. Not that this is treated like anything of note because the announcers are laughing about Sherri Shepard from The View. Miz sends shoulders into MVP’s ribs in the corner followed by the running corner clothesline. A top rope double ax gets two for Miz and we hit the chinlock.

After that eats up some time, MVP pounds away with all of his usual stuff. Ballin hits and a running boot to the side of the head gets two for the challenger. A big shoulder block gets the same for MVP but he misses a running boot in the corner. MVP grabs three straight quick near falls but gets caught in a small package for the pin to keep the title on Miz.

Rating: D+. If there was a reason for this to be on PPV other than the show was running short, I don’t know what it was. Miz didn’t look like anything special out there but somehow he would be world champion a year later. MVP on the other hand would be out of the WWE but he did well enough in Japan. Nothing to see here other than a filler match.

Post match MVP hits the Playmaker on Miz and gets booed LOUDLY. He lost completely clean so the booing is deserved.

Show and Jericho, the former tag team champions, run into each other. Show accuses him of being jealous of the chemistry Show and Miz have but Jericho brushes it off. He calls the crowd gelatinous worms before pointing out all of the similarities he and Miz have. Show says he’ll throw both Miz and Jericho out to win the Rumble. R-Truth pops up and says he’ll do the same. Show leaves Jericho standing there much to Jericho’s chagrin.

DiBiase wishes Orton luck and says he’s got Randy’s back. Orton asks where Cody is but DiBiase doesn’t know. This was during the time when Legacy was about to die and both members were trying to get on Randy’s best side. DiBiase claims that Rhodes only wants to win the Rumble but Orton has heard enough. He doesn’t want anyone’s help and gets a clear face pop in response.

The National Guard is here.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Sheamus won the title in a shocker last month at TLC and is heel here. He’s also still not that good and wouldn’t really hit his stride for about a year and a half. They stare at each other to start and my goodness is Sheamus pale. A dropkick puts the champion down but he comes right back with a running ax handle. Sheamus gets in a shot to the arm and we head to the floor where said arm is sent into the steps.

Back in and Orton goes for the knee and things slow down a bit. Orton wouldn’t really pick up the pace of his offense until about the following year which made his matches pretty hard to sit through. Sheamus comes back by sending Orton’s shoulder into the post twice and hitting some shoulder blocks in the corner. That gets him nowhere though as Orton takes out the knee again and knocks Sheamus to the floor.

They head inside again and yet AGAIN momentum shifts back to Sheamus as he hits a DDT on the arm for two. Off to an armbar for a bit before they slug it out to the boo/yay chants. Orton wins the slugout but walks into the Irish Curse for two. The High Cross is escaped and Orton kicks Sheamus in the head to send him to the outside. Orton gets ready for the RKO but Rhodes jumps the guardrail and blasts Sheamus in the back before running away. The referee sees it though and despite Orton hitting the RKO, he’s disqualified and Sheamus keeps the title. Lame ending to a pretty lame match.

Rating: D+. Like I said, Sheamus just wasn’t very good yet. He was still this big imposing brawler who pounded on people and that’s about it. There was indeed a story in the match but it wasn’t a very entertaining one as they just kept beating on each other’s limbs but when there’s no difference because of the beating, the story doesn’t work. The ending didn’t help either but it did set up something in the future.

Post match Orton snaps on Cody as DiBiase comes down to save his partner. While Orton yells at Cody in the corner, Sheamus comes back in and lays out Randy with a Brogue Kick.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool. This was an awkward feud as Mickie won the title shot in a triple threat and then Laycool made fun of Mickie for being fat. This is of course odd as Mickie is a professional athlete and gorgeous and would only be called fat by a crazy person. It’s also pretty disturbing when you consider how WWE pushes the Divas as role models. The final bit of it was a segment where Mickie got beaten down and covered in food.

Women’s Title: Michelle McCool vs. Mickie James

Pre match Michelle runs her mouth about how fat Mickie is and accuses her of skipping out on the match. Michelle offers cake and here’s Layla in a Mickie Pig costume. The real Mickie sprints to the ring and hits a Thesz Press on Layla on the floor. She heads inside, sends Michelle into Layla and hits the MickieDT for the pin and the title in 20 seconds.

Post match the other Divas bring out a cake and smash it into Laycool’s faces.

We recap Mysterio vs. Undertaker. Rey won the shot by slamming a cage door onto Batista’s head to escape because that’s what heroes do. Taker said he’ll show no mercy on Mysterio so Rey uses the same line everyone does on Taker: he isn’t afraid. Batista beat up Mysterio as well, claiming that Undertaker and the world title was his.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Undertaker

Mysterio, in the deep south, comes out wearing a white hood. Striker talks about Lawler being in the ring with Kamala and Lord Humongous (Sid) because he thinks it makes him sound interesting. He’s trying to make a comparison to being in the ring with Undertaker, but if he was as smart as he thinks he is, he would ask Jerry what it’s like to be in the ring with Undertaker himself, which would save a lot of headaches.

Rey fires off some shots in the corner before Taker grabs him by the neck and throws him up and over the top and out to the floor. That looked awesome. Back to the apron and Rey fires off strikes to the face, only to get punched right back down to the floor by a single shot. Taker misses the legdrop on the apron but hits it the second time before heading back in. Rey counters a chokeslam into the 619 but Taker easily grabs the legs. Tombstone is countered and Taker misses an elbow drop.

Rey tries a springboard cross body but jumps into a boot to the chest. We head to the floor again and there’s another big boot to the head to take Rey down. A third big boot keeps Rey down but the fourth misses and Taker sends his leg around the post. Rey hits a baseball slide to send the leg into said post and Taker is in trouble. The seated senton off the apron is caught and Taker puts him back on the apron, only to be caught by an Asai Moonsault to put both guys down.

Taker grabs Rey by the throat and slams him into the barricade. The champion’s nose is busted a bit. Taker does that lifting wristlock of his to crank on the arm a bit before punching Rey down in the corner for a bit. A big side slam gets two for the guy who would use a side slam in this match as Striker goes into this big speech about how the blood shows that undertaker is mortal. Seriously, it’s a BLOODY NOSE. Watch the freaking Lesnar match in the Cell when the blood is literally dripping from Taker’s head and down onto Lesnar’s body.

Rey starts firing off some punches but a single shot from Taker is enough to put him back down. A jawbreaker finally staggers the big man and they do a kind of cross body, although Taker counters into something like Langston’s Big Ending, so it’s hard to say which hurt worse. Taker sits up so Rey kicks him in the face. Why has no one done that before? Rey drops the dime (springboard legdrop) for two but Taker kills him with a big clothesline. The Last Ride is countered and the 619 hits as does a second one, but the West Coast Pop is countered into the Last Ride to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was solid stuff for the most part for a few reasons. First of all, they didn’t make Taker look ridiculous to get into position for Rey’s moves. That’s my biggest issue with most of Rey’s battles against giants: how stupid the big men look. The other good thing here is that Taker wasn’t knocked silly after just a few moves. Rey only hit maybe a dozen offensive moves here other than basic strikes and it wouldn’t have made sense to have Taker in major trouble. Finally, Rey can bump like crazy when he’s trying to. The only issues here are the lack of a threat to Taker and Striker’s commentary. Chill out already man.

Shawn is watching in the back when Kane comes in and says Shawn’s obsession with Taker is unhealthy. This is KANE calling something unhealthy. He warns Shawn to cool it with Taker because it won’t end well. Kane leaves and HHH comes in. Shawn apologizes for whatever happened on Raw which apparently isn’t important enough to specify. HHH agrees Shawn vs. Taker is meant to be, but it won’t be by wining the Rumble.

Rumble by the Numbers time:

23 Winners

627 entrants eliminated

36 eliminations by Austin

11 eliminations by Kane in 2001

2002 was the last Rumble in Atlanta

62:12 Rey was in the Rumble in 2006

2 seconds was the record for 20 years until Santino broke it last year

3 wins for Austin

2 win for #1, the same as #30

70% of the winners win at Mania

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is #1 and Evan Bourne is #2. Bourne snaps off a headscissors to start and follows up with a spinwheel kick to take Dolph down. Ziggler comes back with the Zig Zag but can’t throw Evan out. Bourne decks Ziggler and hits Air Bourne as CM Punk of the Straightedge Society is #3. He slams the other two guys’ heads together and dumps them out one after the other. Punk gets a mic and says that tonight is the greatest night in the history of the Straightedge Society. These two are just the first of 29 men who will challenge him, but they can be saved.

The clock starts running down, so Punk gives us the line of the night: “Excuse me, it’s clobberin time.” JTG is #4 and after a few clotheslines, he poses like an idiot in the corner and gets dumped. Punk gets the mic again and says that not everyone can be saved because they don’t have his dedication. Great Khali is #5 and Punk immediately says he can make Khali greater by saving him. He asks Khali to raise his hand for the Straightedge Pledge but Khali lowers the hand onto Punk’s head for the chop.

There’s the Khali Vice and in less than 90 seconds, Beth Phoenix of all people is #6. She stares down Khali and gets picked up and placed on the apron. Beth kisses Khali but in the process pulls him over the top to eliminate him. Phoenix gets back in and BEATS UP PUNK, only to get caught in a GTS to the chest. Would that really knock her out? Before she’s dumped out, here’s Zack Ryder at #7.

As Ryder gets in, Punk grabs the mic and says Zack has potential. PREACH IT BROTHER! Punk starts offering him a spot but his Ryder with the mic before he gets done with it. The fans are going nuts for Punk now and there goes Ryder. Punk talks about how great he is and wants to know who is next, but whoever it is, they’re inferior to Punk. In at #8 is HHH as we enter the second segment of the Rumble.

They stare each other down and HHH starts punching. The facebuster has Punk staggered and a spinebuster puts him down as Drew McIntyre is #9. That gives us a tag champion in HHH and the IC Champion in Drew at the moment. HHH is looking a bit flabby here. He hits the high knee on McIntyre and escapes the GTS to eliminate Punk. DiBiase is #10 as we’re flying through this.

HHH gets double teamed down in the corner until John Morrison, the guy that lost the title to McIntyre, is #11. He takes both heels down and pounds away on them before hitting a jumping DDT on Drew. Starship Pain almost completely misses Drew and HHH clotheslines John down. Kane is #12 and comes in with the top rope clothesline to HHH. There’s a double chokeslam to McIntyre and Morrison before Kane tries to dump DiBiase.

Rhodes is #13 and saves Ted as he comes in. Morrison is sent to the apron and springboards back in, only to get dropkicked out of the air. Legacy goes after Kane but HHH saves him for no apparent reason. Cody saves himself from being eliminated and MVP is #14. Miz runs up behind him though and blasts MVP with the US Title. Morrison hits the Moonlight Drive on McIntyre to break up the Future Shock on Kane. HHH is in trouble in the corner and MVP is carried to the back.

Carlito is #15 and the ring is starting to get full. There’s a Backstabber to HHH and one for Drew and Ted as well. Miz is #16 and hits a quick Finale on Carlito. Cue MVP to clothesline Miz out and eliminate himself in the process. Matt Hardy is #17 and lasts about 20 seconds before Kane puts him out. HHH immediately dumps Kane too and the ring is a lot more empty all of a sudden.

HHH starts laying out everyone and Shawn is #18. Carlito is backdropped out, Rhodes and DiBiase are tossed, Morrison gets dumped, and DX puts out McIntyre to get us down to DX. Before anything can happen though, Cena is #19 to get us to the final third of the match. Cena cleans house and hits a double Shuffle before getting caught in the Pedigree. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks HHH out to pop the crowd BIG.

Shelton Benjamin in that stupid gold period is #20. He hits Paydirt on both guys but gets dumped by Cena in less than 50 seconds. Yoshi Tatsu is #21 and doesn’t even make it 30 seconds. Big Show is #22 and Cena is shaken. Big Show RUNS down to the ring and house is cleaned. Shawn and Cena try to eliminate each other but Show pulls Shawn back in for some reason. What’s up with that tonight?

Mark Henry is #23 and we get a quick battle of the giant. Who would think those two would have a world title feud a year and a half later and be REALLY popular? Henry slams Show and falls on Cena as he tries an AA. Show spears Henry down and Chris Masters is #24. Masters tries the Masterlock on Show and gets dumped for his efforts. Now Henry goes after Show but Shawn breaks it up for some reason. R-Truth is #25 and actually dumps BOTH big guys. There’s something you wouldn’t expect.

Truth hits a Stroke on Cena and Jack Swagger is #26. All three guys get Vader Bombs and Swagger goes old school with a very slow Oklahoma Stampede. Jack knocks Michaels to the apron but can’t get the elimination. Kingston is #27 and cleans house on Swagger, hitting the Boom Drop and dumping him out with a nice leverage move. Truth puts Kofi on the apron but gets pulled out by a reverse headscissors.

Jericho is #28 but after cleaning about half the house, Cena grabs an AA to put him down. Shawn adds the top rope elbow and tunes up the band but Kofi hits Trouble in Paradise to take him out. Cena dumps Kofi but walks into a Codebreaker. Everyone is down and EDGE makes his big return at #29. That’s rather brilliant instead of waiting for the big surprise at #30, we get a SWERVE that actually makes sense.

Everyone gets a spear and Jericho is out. Edge is back about six months early and it’s Edge-O-Matics all around. Batista is #30, giving us a final four of Shawn, Cena, Edge and Batista. Not bad at all. It’s power all around but Edge spears him down. Everyone is down now Shawn gets up first and hits the forearm on Cena followed by the nipup.

Shawn slams every American in sight and drops the top rope elbow on Cena. Batista takes one too as Edge is still down in the corner. Sweet Chin Music hits Cena and there’s one for Batista as well. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and Michaels superkicks Edge back in, only to get knocked out by Batista. The crowd gasps HUGE at that and Shawn is about to cry. Shawn gets back in and superkicks the referee to vent some frustration. Shawn FINALLY leaves and Cena escapes the Batista Bomb before dumping Batista out. Edge misses the spear but throws out Cena a second later to go to Wrestlemania.

Rating: A-. This is kind of a hard one to grade. They definitely followed the three act structure which helped a lot and the match was VERY fast paced. I mean, the longest anyone was in there was Cena and he barely broke 20 minutes. The problem with that is it doesn’t give anything time to develop. The main story was Shawn which is fine and he would get to Mania at the end of the day anyway. It’s a really fun Rumble but not one of the best ever.

Overall Rating: B. The Rumble is very solid and the rest has nothing terrible so we’ll call it a good show overall. Things would get a lot more interesting soon after this with the rise of the Nexus and a very solid Wrestlemania. This was also a time of transition for the company as a lot of the guys in this show would be gone by the end of the year. Anyway good show here and worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Miz vs. MVP

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D+

Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

Dang I liked Sheamus a lot more than I thought I did.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/29/royal-rumble-count-up-2010-one-of-the-best-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs




Royal Rumble Count-Up – 2010 (Original): Gotcha!

Royal Rumble 2010
Date: January 31, 2010
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Matt Striker, Jerry Lawler

First off, love that announcing trio. Having 6 guys was WAY too much for PPVs. I’m excited for this Rumble. Yes the title matches are easy to see, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be bad. Sometimes you need predictable matches and this is one of them. The matches look good on paper and the build was all there. The Rumble winner is pretty up in the air actually. That being said the show is starting so it’s time to shut up. Actually it isn’t but you get the point. Let’s get to it.

The video is what you would expect: a look back. Basic but well done as usual.

ECW Title: Ezekiel Jackson vs. Christian

They’ve built this up great as it finally feels like the night Christian is going down. I’m not so sure though. Jackson is a freaking scary man indeed. My stream is very choppy so this is kind of like a fast moving slide show mixed with good audio. There goes Regal after a few minutes. Striker talks too fast at times. Cole sounds sick or something. We hit the formula based stuff which is likely the best way to do this.

Since Jackson is still limited in the ring, it’s probably best to have him be carried by the far more experienced and better Christian. We’re in our second chinlock of the match already. Seriously Striker: CALM DOWN! Christian hits the jumping reverse elbow making him awesome. And then he does those stupid claps to take that away. “Hmm, I have him down and I’ve walked around in a circle so he doesn’t know where he is.

I’ll clap since that doesn’t give him a tip at all.” Jackson hits a big clothesline and we get LARIOTO from Striker. Jackson is really limited. Like Monty Brown levels of limited. I love that slingshot kick that Christian does in the corner. Why should I care about who last won the title where? No one says a word and Striker says nothing? That’s very amusing. Sleeper time. And there’s the Killswitch out of freaking nowhere for the pin. What the heck was that???

Rating: C+. This was your run of the mill big man vs. little man and the more I think about it the more I like the ending. Christian couldn’t hang with Zeke going head to head so he stopped trying to and got a quick win. I actually like that one.

Cryme Tyme both want to be in the Rumble but only one spot is available. Apparently they’ve managed to trade Khali’s spot for a kiss from Tiffany. Apparently not. Gender stereotype humor fails and Khali imitates Urkel. Shad is almost able to look eye to eye with Khali. This is stupid on so many levels. Miz comes in and Teddy, who has no authority on this show, makes the US Title match.

Rhodes sucks up to Orton and throws Ted under the bus. I’d bet on the same thing happening later with Ted,

US Title: MVP vs. The Miz

Talk about two guys that have gone in completely opposite directions. Miz used to look like a joke and is now awesome and MVP used to look awesome and now is a borderline joke. Something tells me he’s winning tonight though. MVP was US Champion what, back in 2007 and he’s still in the same place how long later? There’s a big MIZ IS AWESOME chant. Or was it AWFUL? Either one is a good sign.

MVP is all over him to start which points to Miz hanging onto the belt. Ok, we get it: MVP hung out with some chick from The View. It means nothing at all. Ah there we go. Miz is back now. He’s grown more than anyone else I’ve ever seen in the past two years. We get it also: MVP used to be in prison. Let it die already. MVP is just a failure as a face. His character is designed to be a heel but we can’t have street wise heels that look like stereotypes of course.

Ok, so MVP hits a face crusher and literally 12 seconds later the Ballin Elbow hits. Are we supposed to believe that Miz isn’t going to get up in that amount of time? Seriously? There’s a Pounce from MVP and called so much by Striker. Oh, period. Wouldn’t want to forget that.

I actually don’t know who’s going to win here which is rare in matches like these but it’s a nice plus. And Miz hits a rollup as MVP is getting back in for the pin. And that’s what he needs: wins, even by fluke, that are clean. MVP attacks him after the match and is heavily booed. Please let that be a heel turn. Cole implies it’s not. Blast it.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all. The ending was great here as it literally came out of nowhere. Miz needs more wins like these but it gives him more and more credibility every time which is what his character needs at the moment. I haven’t seen them get a character’s development much better than his in a LONG time and I’m loving it.

Jericho and Show continue their bromance. R-Truth laughs at Jericho and says it’s every man for himself. It’s better than it sounds but it’s still dumb.

Orton is walking. Yes indeed he is. And there’s Ted to say he’s here for him. No Cody in sight though and I was right with my prediction.

Ad for Raw. I love that they feel the need to advertise a show that you likely would have had to see in order to buy this show.

Soldiers are here. Oh they’re from the National Guard.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

And the champion comes out first for no apparent reason. Sheamus is another character that has gotten a solid push from nowhere and I’m liking it. It’s working bette than Bradshaw’s when they did the same thing and I think that’s because there’s nothing of his past to compare it to. Bradshaw had nothing to go off of in the main event either but we had known him for years and he sucked. Orton gets a bit of a pop.

Please: give him a face title run. It could work. A heel vs. heel title match isn’t something I would have guessed on but it should be awesome. I’m pulling for the Irish dude just to prevent anything resembling Orton vs. HHH or Cena again. We get the big match intros too. Orton gets a straight up face pop. Sheamus gets heat but it’s mild. Still though, likely his best ever. It’s weird seeing Orton not being taller.

Sheamus is getting a bit of heat here. I like it. MASSIVE Randy chant. The fans Vince. LISTEN TO THEM. Yep, he’s wrestling life a face too. Sheamus is dominating here as he should. I’m glad they never went anywhere with the kick he gave Lawler. Orton goes for the knee which makes a lot of sense here. There has been talk of Sheamus holding the belt until Mania. I like it. We’ve begged for a new main event guy and we’ve gotten one.

Giving him a long reign is making him far more credible as a champion and main event player. It’s a brilliant move and I think it’s working. Orton STAYS ON THE KNEE! Oh blessed psychology how I love you! Sheamus works on the arm of all things. It’s different if nothing else. There’s the boo/yay thing. Fans are more or less completely behind Orton which is something Vince needs to listen to.

Sheamus goes for the Razor’s Edge but his knee gives out. See what psychology can do for you? Orton hits that elevated DDT that is varying degrees of awesome. They’re trying so hard to have him be heel in this and it’s failing epically. The Punt, which again is more of a freaking place kick but what do I know. Vince started the XFL so obviously he’s smarter than I am. It misses of course because that never hits on PPV for some reason.

Oh wait forgot HIAC. There’s likely a reason for that one. Rhodes runs in and attacks Sheamus but the RKO hits, meaning Sheamus keeps the belt. YES! Came out of nowhere but whatever. The fans are calling for the RKO on Rhodes but they settle for a choke instead. Ted comes down and gets that whipping. Grr and there goes the stream again! Orton more or less fires them, HOPEFULLY turning face. And Sheamus kicks Orton in the head and everyone leaves him there. Not bad at all.

Rating: B. I liked this a lot more than I should have. The psychology was all working here and it played into the match later on which is nice. The DQ ending kind of sucked as I would have preferred Sheamus to get a pin but this worked just fine I think. Legacy is FINALLY over though which is the far more important thing.

We recap Mickie vs. McCool which is by far the best build to a match I’ve seen in a women’s match in years . It’s even better than the Mark Henry vs. Viscera match. Short version: McCool and Layla were saying that Mickie was fat and it led to this. It’s a lot better than it sounds, trust me.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Michelle McCool

I’m actually pumped for this thing if you can believe that. Odds are it’s going to suck but whatever. The video had Beth in it which implies she’ll be here tonight. Sweet goodness change Michelle’s music. I freak can’t stand it. McCool cuts a bad promo before the match. Mickie isn’t here apparently?

And here’s Layla in the fat suit. This was stupid Friday but cute I guess and now…never mind as Mickie is here. And it’s a 20 second match as Mickie freaking murders her. Ok then. And they bring out food and poor it on the heels. Good to know.

Rating: N/A. Not sure if I like this or not. Mickie dominating is good as it ends this quickly, but it feels flat otherwise. I think I like it though. Yeah let’s go with that.

Ad for Elimination Chamber. Yeah nothing says SPECIAL gimmick match more than two in one night baby!

We recap Rey vs. Taker, which more or less is Rey won a contender’s match and then Batista is a whiny man. Something tells me that’s your ending because he has muscles and therefore he’s a good wrestler, at least in Vince’s eyes.

Smackdown World Title: Undertaker vs. Rey Mysterio

They call this the biggest match in Rey’s career. Yep, far bigger than winning the title at Mania I’m sure. As bad as a champion that he is, that belt looks awesome on Taker’s waist. More big match intros which while they’re usually good, they kind of don’t work for Taker for some reason. This is likely to rock or suck with no real in between. This is like a wet dream for Vince: both guys are big faces so why wouldn’t this work?

Taker at 299 pounds sounds odd for some reason. Rey gets freaking launched to the floor but lands on his feet. Nice indeed. Taker has done maybe two moves and he’s put Rey on the floor twice. This is all Taker so far. Thankfully the 619 misses. Taker goes for the Tombstone but Rey uses the ancient Chinese principle of kicking his feet to get out of it. Taker of course messes up his knee because that’s all he can do in most matches anymore.

His hip is in a lot of legit pain at this point so it’s likely not a ton of acting. We get the Asai Moonsault for the Japanese fans out there. Taker’s chest looks the same as Michelle’s used to look like. I wonder if they got them done in the same place? They seem like they’re killing time, which screams BATISTA to me.

Surprisingly enough though it doesn’t come as Taker just more or less casually hits the Last Ride after countering a flippy. Where’s Norcal when I need him? Oh yeah at a bar with muscle guys.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t thrilled here at all. The only good thing was that there was a clean ending which was my main concern here. It’s two more old guys in the main event but at least they’re popular so that’s all I can ask for. Not awful, but underwhelming.

Shawn and Kane talk. HHH and Shawn talk. Greatness personified.

I freaking LOVE that video package about the numbers.

Royal Rumble

Dolph Ziggler is first and Evan Bourne is second. Ok then. And the Zig Zag hits a few minutes in. He pulls a Davey Boy Smith though and doesn’t make sure he goes over. The Shooting Star hits and Punk is third. With the roll he’s been on lately he needs a LONG run here. He starts off hot by throwing out both guys and has time to cut a promo. The heat is there, the look is there and the ability is there.

He has to job to the old guys though right? Number four is one of Cryme Tyme. Oh it’s JTG. Please….make it quick. Hey I got my wish! It lasted just a few seconds as we get our second promo of the night. I love Punk in case I didn’t make that clear. Fifth is Khali. Don’t you freaking put Punk out to this imbecile! You know they will though. Please, sacrifice Serena or something. I beg of you Vince, use your freaking brain.

Nope, Punk gets his the beating. Oh I get it: Khali is a “fun” character so that makes the idiocy ok. He gets the vice but it doesn’t last long enough and…Beth Phoenix is 6th? Well ok then. It’s different if nothing else. Beth gets picked up and placed on the apron where she kisses Khali before ELIMINATING HIM!! Punk hits her with the GTS after a brief skirmish. Didn’t see this coming. Seventh is Zach Ryder. This is odd indeed.

Beth is odd as we get some awesome music from Ryder. Punk tries to recruit Ryder and then hits him to MASSIVE face pops. He’s alone again as this is awesome. It’s another promo. Kane or Show will put him out soon enough. He says he’s better than whoever is next and you can smell the elimination coming from here. And it’s HHH. Bye Punk. Have fun in the belly of HHH’s ego. His intro takes the better part of ever so at least he’s consistent.

Hey Punk actually lasts until McIntyre is 9th. And HHH puts out Punk to get his ego up again. Yep, can’t have these young talented and over guys taking the place of guys like HHH. HHH is called the future of the company. That’s a scary thought. DiBiase is 10th. We’re 1/3 of the way through this. Oh great. Morrison is 11th. Nothing of note is happening at all. McIntyre takes Starship Pain and here’s HHH to take his head off anyway.

Kane is 12th, To recap it’s HHH, Kane, DiBiase, Morrison and McIntyre in there at the moment. The IC Title boys take a double chokeslam and it’s all Kane meaning he’ll be out soon or last a long time. And HHH saves DiBiase. Ok then. I guess the whole end your career thing is forgives. Cody Rhodes comes up on the monitor and Striker says it must be Rhodes. What would we do without you Matty? Legacy dominates…kind of. Morrison is incredibly acrobatic.

Rhodes underrated in the ring. Striker says he’s the seed of the Dream. BAD IMAGE MAN! Kane of course is moving and Cole can’t tell McIntyre and HHH apart. MVP is 14th. Miz jumps him in the aisle and blasts him with the belt. Know what would be nice now? A shot of the ring. Oh there it is. Morrison hits a SICK springboard spinkick to the head of McIntyre. MVP is taken out as I’m pretty sure HHH is going to win here.

My guess is Shawn vs. HHH somewhere down the line because of Shawn’s incessant ego. Carlito is 15th and apparently he’s interesting. Yeah that’s nonsense if I’ve ever heard it. He hits a nice springboard reverse elbow to Legacy. That was nice. MVP will likely run in and attack Miz later. Nothing predictable at all there. HHH takes the Backstabber as do a lot of people. Holy crap he’s dominating. Sixteenth is Miz. Amazingly MVP doesn’t jump him. That’ll be next I guess.

The Skull Crushing Finale hits Carlito. The fans pop like a cherry pie for Miz vs. Morrison and here’s MVP to put himself and Miz out. Legacy has HHH in trouble and of course he doesn’t go out. Carlito hangs onto the rope and stays in. Number 17 is Matt Hardy to a huge pop. This crowd is awesome. To continue the trend he dominates and hits a bunch of people before Kane puts him out and Kane is out by HHH.

You really can see it coming. I hope I need glasses. Spinebusters all around. A hot crowd pops for him so that validates this I suppose. HBK is 18th and I think I feel a showdown of 1990 proportions coming. Rhodes and Carlito and DiBiase are gone. Ok we have Shawn, McIntyre, Morrison and HHH in there at the moment. Ok take out Morrison and the showdown is pretty clear.

Shawn has the second most eliminations in Rumble history apparently. Yep it’s showdown time and there’s the clock. It’ll be a jobber and…never mind it’s Cena. Vince the Survivor Series bombed with this main event so why wouldn’t this do it too? And of course he beats up DX. A double You Can’t See Me is booed to an extent. HHH stops an FU and takes a Pedigree AND HHH IS SUPERKICKED OUT OF THE MATCH! I am STUNNED as all goodness. TAKE THAT MELTZER!!!

Shelton is in now and I’m switching my bet to Cena. Shawn has put Shelton out like three years in a row or something. This is his eighth consecutive Rumble. Wow I wouldn’t have guessed that one. Cena ends Shawn’s streak and puts out Shelton. Holy Mania rematch Batman. Yoshi Tatsu is 21st. I like this guy for some reason. Of course Striker has a dumb name for him: the Poison Fist of the Pacific Rim. Cena dumps him in a few seconds and we’re back to Shawn and Cena.

Nothing overdone about that AT ALL is there? Ok Atlanta is allowed to do the WOOs. Big Show is 22nd. Show almost goes out but saves himself. Cena goes for an FU but it misses. Shawn has to skin the cat (what a name I tell you) because Chin Music misses. Mark Henry is 23rd. Well they’re having some big names in there at least. I still can’t get over HHH being out already. It’s a curveball if nothing else. Henry goes for a slam can can’t get it.

Why do I have a feeling he’s not the world’s strongest man? He gets the slam a bit later but then almost gets an FU. Masters is number 24. Have to have some jobbers I guess. He press slams Shawn and of course doesn’t throw him out. Instead he puts the Masterlock on Show and he gets tossed for it. Henry and Show go at it again as we have a clock. It’s R-Truth….AND HE PUTS OUT SHOW AND HENRY.

I guess there is a youth movement. It’s Truth, Cena and Michaels here. He shows his TNA connection by hitting Cena with the Stroke. The fans are chanting boring. This hasn’t been bad at all. Swagger is 26th as Norcal pops. This is his first Rumble. I wouldn’t have guessed that. Vader Bombs all around. NO! Stream went out! Never mind it’s back!

Kofi is 27th. There goes Truth. Jericho is 28th. Kofi put out Truth in case you were wondering. He follows that up by kicking the heck out of Shawn and then gets thrown by Cena. All three are down and here’s 29. HOLY CRAP IT’S EDGE! Ok it’s not really shocking but still cool moment. Oh yeah he’s a face. Just like he should be. Spears all around and we might not have a surefire winner now.

There goes Jericho and Edge is domination. Sweet the Edgecution is back! Fans are WAY into this. Shame Batista will be 30th. It would have made sense to just have it be Edge in at 30. Ok final four are Cena, Shawn, Batissta and Edge. Naturally Batista is dominating. Anyone of these guys could win. Edge spears him down and Cena FUs Edge so everyone is down. Shawn nips up to another great pop. That’s one of those moves that just plain works.

Shawn is dominating here and Striker screws up again by saying that Edge has had no vigor. Shawn is dominating here and this is exciting me. Cena gets kicked and si does Big Dave. Edge clotheslines Shawn to the apron and then gets superkicked back in. DAVE PUTS SHAWN OUT! The crowd just goes dead silent. That came from nowhere. This is wide open at this point. WOW I haven’t heard a crowd die like that ever.

That…might not have been what was supposed to happen. He goes nuts an goes back in, beating up referees. Could this be a Shawn HEEL TURN??? I certainly freaking hope so. More referees come down as Shawn looks freaking crushed. Striker says this is heartbreaking (no pun intended I’m sure) as he says Shawn has never achieved this. If he means beating Taker he’s an idiot. He’s also never achieved a good buyrate but we’ll ignore that.

Ok so it’s Edge, Batista and Cena. Cena reverses the Batista Bomb and Batista reverses the FU and there goes Batista! This would suggest Edge winning but I’m not so sure. He sets for the spear with those great visuals of his and it misses of course. Cena goes for a clothesline and EDGE WINS IT! YEAH!

Take that people screaming this was going to be predicable! Love that ending, even though it’s the same thing they did with Cena but not as exciting/sweet. This is what we needed too: a FRESH face that is going to get some POPS. Great move all around and a great Rumble match.

Rating: A. Very solid Rumble here. Edge winning was a very pleasant shock and I liked it a lot. They had the star power in there tonight and no Santino or Duggan or jokes like that who are just going to waste time and spots. The formula works great when it clicks and this was no exception. I was bored until HHH got dumped but it wasn’t awful before that. Once he’s gone though, it’s straight through the roof. Very good Rumble and likely in the top five ever of them.

Overall Rating: A-. I was going back and forth between B- and C+. The whole show was indeed nothing great, but there was nothing that bad really. The right people won, for the most part they won clean, Orton is a face…I think, Shawn is snapping, Legacy is OVER, and Edge is back as a top level face.

This was a very good show and if you want to say it was predictable, let me know so I can laugh at you. Fun show and worth checking out, just don’t expect a classic. Edited: what the heck am I thinking? This show was great. A-.

 

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – January 18, 2021: I Need A Double Yoo-Hoo After This Show

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 18, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

We’re less than two weeks away from the Royal Rumble and that means it is time to start adding in some new names to the lineups. There are several spots still available and that means we can fill in a few more of them over the next two weeks. And there’s the whole Randy Orton getting hit with a fireball deal. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Martin Luther King Jr. Day video.

From the shadows, Randy Orton talks about people who fight fire with fire usually wind up with ashes. We see a mask over his face as he says the voices in his head have never been louder. He talks about needing to redirect his pure hatred and we see Alexa Bliss throwing the fireball last week. The fire that melted the skin off his face will never go away. He is wearing his mask to protect himself but to shield everyone else from the horror.

The burns could have been much worse or could have disfigured him forever. Orton doesn’t blame her though because he blames the Fiend. Orton blames the Fiend for this because he knows what the Fiend wants. The Fiend wants to stop Orton from achieving the inevitable. We see clips of Orton’s two Royal Rumble wins as Orton talks about how he would be a threat to win the Rumble even if you chopped off all of his limbs.

He enjoys the pain and you can blame the Fiend when he burns everyone’s Wrestlemania dreams to ashes. Orton lights and the blows out a match. That was certainly different, though would it have been too much to wait more than a week after he was burned to appear again? That’s not enough to be gone for another show?

We look at Ric Flair intentionally costing Charlotte a match against Lacey Evans last week and then leaving with Evans.

Ric Flair and Lacey Evans arrived earlier today, with Lacey asking to hear a Horsemen story. Lacey doesn’t like being interrupted to ask about what is going on between them because she is just learning from the best. They’ll be watching Charlotte vs. Peyton Royce tonight.

Charlotte vs. Peyton Royce

Peyton (now with purple hair) jumps her from behind during the entrances and we take a break. Back with the match officially starting and Royce jumping her again. This time Charlotte knocks her to the floor for the big chops but one of them hits the post to let Peyton get a breather. Back in and Royce gets in a few shots until Charlotte chops her into the corner.

A neckbreaker out of the corner gets two but here’s Ric Flair (Tom: “Oh not this again.” Amen brother.) with Lacey Evans, in her own Nature Boy robe. Royce uses the distraction to hit a spinning kick to the face for two. Back from a break with Charlotte chopping her to the floor for a nine count. Charlotte goes for the leg and the Figure Eight makes Royce tap at 12:06.

Rating: D+. Longer than it needed to be here (and thank goodness Peyton jumped her before the bell, only to have everything settled down for the opening bell) and thank goodness they managed to find a way for Ric Flair to appear again. It had been a few months since he had some kind of an angle and that’s just too long to be without him. Anyway, nothing to see here, other than WWE trying and failing to make me feel sympathetic for Charlotte.

Riddle pops in to interrupt the Hurt Business. He compliments their clothes, including saying that MVP looks like Gordon Gecko (Riddle does not seem like a Wall Street guy). Lashley compliments the flip flops and then stomps on (or near) Riddle’s foot.

Post break Riddle insists that he’ll be good to go for his six man later.

We get a promo from earlier today with Mustafa Ali talking about Kofi Kingston having a broken jaw. Ali wants to break Kingston’s spirit by breaking someone Kofi cares about the most in Xavier Woods. This is tied into Kofi taking Ali’s spot in the Elimination Chamber back in 2019. That’s a story I didn’t think we would revisit.

Mace vs. Xavier Woods

The rest of Retribution is here and Woods hits Ali in the mouth before the bell. Back from a break and things get started with Mace taking Woods down. The choking is on until Mace sends him into the corner, with Woods looking rocked. Woods gets in a few shots to the face and dropkicks the knee out to put Mace down for a change. Ali gets knocked off the apron so he tells the team to do it now. Retribution surrounds the ring and Mace hits a side kick. A fireman’s carry spun into a slam (with Mace dropping him on the landing) finishes Woods at 4:04.

Rating: C-. The ending didn’t help things but the idea of building to Kofi vs. Ali is interesting, as they have actually waited two years for an interesting match. If nothing else, actually giving Retribution an interesting feud is a different way to go. I doubt it gets there, but a Wrestlemania match could certainly be interesting.

Post match Ali tells Woods that they’re coming for Kingston.

Asuka is asked what to expect in Alexa’s Playground. Asuka: “I don’t know.” After a look at Bliss burning Orton last week, Asuka says she doesn’t want to see Alexa’s dark side.

We get a special report, featuring HHH (Henry E. Panki) and Stephanie McMahon (Anita Reelman) as news reporters. Weatherman Sunny McCloud (Roman Reigns) and Paul Heyman announce that Wrestlemania XXXVII will be in Tampa. Hailey Mary (Sasha Banks) is in Dallas, where Wrestlemania XXXVIII will be held in 2022. Then Hugh Kantseeme (John Cena) is in Los Angeles, where Wrestlemania XXXIX will be held in 2023. Then they’re off the air and HHH and Stephanie take off their costumes to say they were both awesome. This is….uh….well it’s different. We’ll go with different.

Here is Alexa Bliss for Alexa’s Playground. She wants to address the viper in the room. Things got a little heated with Randy Orton last week but she knows someone if he is interested in some sunblock. As for tonight though, her guest is Asuka, who looks scared of where to sit. Bliss says that isn’t your seat, but she wasn’t talking to Asuka. For now though, Bliss has some special news.

After asking the invisible person in the swing if she should tell them, she announces her entry into the Royal Rumble. That means she could go on to Wrestlemania to face Asuka, who says she is a big fan of Bliss. Asuka, sounding rather nervous, says yowie wowie. Bliss apologizes to whoever is next to her and Asuka starts dancing. Bliss shouts to stop it and talks to the swing. Asuka tries to calm Bliss down by saying he is still here, but Bliss says not to say his name. A scared Asuka leaves.

Goldberg vs. Drew McIntyre is set for the Royal Rumble. Tonight, JEFF JARRETT will break the match down.

Miz and John Morrison promise some shenanigans with Goldberg on the Dirt Sheet.

Shayna Baszler is ready to destroy Mandy Rose tonight, just like she’ll do to everyone at the Royal Rumble. Then Nia Jax bickers with Shayna about carrying her. WHY ARE THESE TWO STILL FRIENDS???

Jeff Jarrett picks Goldberg to defeat Drew McIntyre at the Royal Rumble.

We look at last week’s tag match with Shayna Baszler/Nia Jax beating Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke.

Mandy Rose vs. Shayna Baszler

It should be noted that Rose’s entrance took place before Shayna’s interview, which was followed by a break. Nia Jax is on commentary as Shayna takes Mandy down for a neck crank. Mandy fights out and is taken right back down into the neck crank again. Shayna stomps on the arm but Mandy grabs a rollup for two. The clothesline comeback is on but Baszler kicks the bad arm again. Shayna pulls her down by the arm and finishes with the Kirifuda Clutch at 3:43.

Rating: D. This match made me think of Hulk Hogan vs. Earthquake at Summerslam 1990. After Hogan beat Earthquake, he promised to drag him all around the country and beat him over and over. That’s a cool thing to say, but what difference does it make to beat the same person over and over again? Baszler and Jax have beaten Rose and Brooke time after time now and I’m not sure what WWE thinks they’re getting out of doing it again.

Post match Jax and Baszler argue AGAIN, with Dana Brooke dropkicking Jax into Baszler.

Post break Jax and Baszler argue AGAIN, with Charly Caruso interrupting to point out that they’re arguing. Jax says they never get along, but no one around here does. This is the perfect time for them to get their rematch for the Tag Team Titles because Charlotte and Asuka aren’t even speaking.

We look at the opening match with Ric Flair and Lacey Evans ticking Charlotte off and Charlotte taking it out on Peyton Royce.

Charlotte is sick of people saying she is living off of her last name when you have Lacey Evans living off of her family’s last name. She’s sick off all the trash, because Evans can wear the robe but she can never take the crown.

We look at Adam Pearce signing the contract to face Roman Reigns at the Royal Rumble but then swapping in Kevin Owens in his place.

Ricochet is with Adam Pearce, who is giving him an opportunity tonight. AJ Styles and Omos come in with AJ saying he has never gotten a chance. Ricochet compares it to 50 First Dates because AJ can’t remember anything. He starts to explain it but AJ says he knows the movie (AJ: “It’s in my top ten.”). Ricochet says AJ is forgetting TLC but now it’s time to go to the ring.

Ricochet vs. AJ Styles

After Ricochet’s entrance, AJ is still in the back with Pearce and threatens him with Omos. That takes us to another break and now we’re ready to go. AJ’s headlock doesn’t get very far as Ricochet hits a Japanese armdrag into a jackknife rollup for two. Ricochet sends AJ outside, stops to glare at Omos, and then slides down for an anklescissors to drop AJ again.

Another dive is pulled out of the air by Omos, who then just drops Ricochet with a thud. We take a break and come back with Ricochet still in trouble until a spinning DDT drops AJ. Ricochet muscles him over with a German suplex but AJ is right back with a brainbuster for his own two.

The fireman’s carry backbreaker gets the same so AJ heads to the apron. The Phenomenal Forearm is countered into the Recoil for a slightly delayed two and they’re both down again. Back up and Ricochet tries a springboard but gets countered into the Styles Clash for the pin at 13:00.

Rating: B. This was the kind of match that the show needed as they had two talented guys going out there and doing their thing while getting some time. I’m not wild on Ricochet losing again but you can’t let false hope ruin the few good things about this show. It’s by far the best thing on the show tonight and the kind of thing that helped boost the rest of the pretty weak night up.

We look back at Alexa’s Playground.

And now, the Dirt Sheet, because we need another talk show. Miz and John Morrison talk about how great things could be for Goldberg if he wins the title one more time. That brings us to their guest tonight: Goldberg! Uh….make that Gillberg! As cliched as that might be, it’s nice to see Gillberg after his recent health issues. Anyway, Gillberg talks about everything he does in his entrance, but here’s…..a mini Drew McIntyre to interrupt.

After putting in the mini sword (Joe: “That’s the Clayless.”), mini Drew (with his kilt a bit too low and having to adjust his hair) says he is here to address his Royal Rumble opponent face to face. Drew promises to kick Goldberg back to 1998 and then go home and eat some haggis. Morrison mocks Drew’s accent and Drew breaks character, asking if we can do it again. Miz snaps on Morrison for getting an actor from New Jersey instead of New York, LA or Cleveland. Morrison: “CLEVELAND???”

Gillberg interrupts with his goofy face and gets a double shut up. They decide to wrap it up with Miz saying Drew and Goldberg will both lose at the Rumble because Miz is cashing in, because he’s the Miz and he is……next. Miz and Morrison bickering was funny but after everything else on this show, this was a really bad idea. Except for Gillberg, because Gillberg is awesome.

Hurt Business vs. Lucha House Party/Riddle

Cedric Alexander beats on Gran Metalik to start but Shelton Benjamin won’t tag in while not looking happy. Lince Dorado comes in to take Alexander down and hammer away on his back but Shelton and Bobby Lashley still won’t tag in. Shelton finally comes in and sends Dorado into the corner, followed by a double shoulder with Lashley’s help.

Alexander tags himself back in but Shelton does the same, ordering Alexander to get out. The argument lets Dorado hit the Golden Rewind (MVP: “You see what happens??? You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes!”) but Alexander breaks up the tag. Shelton shoves Alexander outside and MVP talks some sense to him as we take a break. Back with Alexander holding a chinlock on Dorado as we look at the pre-break bickering.

Alexander reaches for a tag to Shelton, pulls his hand back, and tags Lashley in instead. Lashley is willing to tag Benjamin, who snaps off a suplex. Dorado finally gets away and brings in Riddle to pick up the pace, despite his taped up foot. The good foot kicks Shelton upside the head and the Final Flash connects for two. Alexander comes back in and argues with Shelton, so Lashley spears Metalik and finishes with the Hurt Lock in a hurry at 12:36.

Rating: D+. Why? Why the heck does WWE insist on doing this nonsense? The Hurt Business has been one of the best things going for the last eight months and now they’re teasing a split just after they win the Tag Team Titles? Why? What good does this do other than messing with something that is working? I know I’m no professional wrestling writer, but sometimes it’s ok to just let something that works keep going rather than throwing in some kind of screwiness for the sake of messing things up.

Post match Riddle cheap shots Lashley, who has to keep Shelton and Alexander apart.

Elias tells Jaxson Ryker to not screw up again this week, because this isn’t Thomas The Tank Engine. Tonight, Jeff Hardy needs to be beaten down until he accepts the universal truth.

Drew McIntyre joins us from his home and says he is still asymptomatic after being diagnosed with the Coronavirus. He has been watching Raw and it makes him think of the circus. You have the clowns like Miz and Morrison but then you have the lions. It’s a little something for everyone and that includes Goldberg. Drew may be gone, but Goldberg better be ready for him at the Rumble because if he isn’t, Drew will drop him in two minutes. Check his title record, because he doesn’t miss. He’ll be back next week.

See this right here? It’s a promo. It doesn’t sound scripted and it doesn’t sound like 14 people who have never been in a ring wrote it. This sounds like Drew McIntyre being told “Talk about Goldberg for two minutes” and then doing just that. Why is this so complicated? It wasn’t even anything great, but it felt natural and had a point, including the circus metaphor. McIntyre is a good talker, but I can’t imagine he’s the only person who can do this.

Jeff Hardy vs. Jaxson Ryker

Elias is here with Ryker, who hammers on Jeff to start. A dropkick puts Ryker down though and Jeff’s legdrop between the legs and basement dropkick get two. Ryker is right back with a belly to back suplex and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Jeff hits a quick Twist of Fate. The Swanton is loaded up so Elias shoves him off for the DQ at 3:10.

Rating: D+. This is another feud that is still going and feels like no one remembers that it needs to end at some point. Haven’t we seen them do all of this stuff already? I’m not sure if just swapping the roles makes that much difference, but at least Ryker and Elias are teasing a breakup after…..six weeks or so?

Post match Ryker is mad at Elias, because he said not to help him. Elias: “I thought you meant ‘don’t’ help me!” Ryker plants Hardy with a Boss Man Slam. To recap, this is the third team that has argued in two hours and forty minutes.

Asuka vs. Alexa Bliss

Non-title. Asuka starts fast and doesn’t seem so scared this time around. An early Shining Wizard connects and Bliss is rocked, but the lights go out Fiend style. Bliss smiles a lot as we take a break. Back with Bliss seemingly transformed (and maybe with different lipstick) into the serious version and Asuka not being sure what to do.

Bliss blocks and dodges a bunch of strikes before shouldering Asuka down without much trouble. Back in and the Mandible Claw is loaded up but Asuka manages to block it. The rapid fire kicks rock Bliss but she grabs Sister Abigail and, with a blank stare, finishes Asuka at 11:36.

Rating: D+. And so we have another example of WWE doing their storytelling thing. I get the idea they’re going for here and it does make Bliss out to be a monster, but Asuka being scared or whatever is not like her whatsoever. She can go with the silly and such, but having her be scared feels out of character. Also, can anyone give me a logical reason why she and Charlotte are Tag Team Champions at the moment other than Charlotte getting another title reign?

Post match the lights flash and Bliss’ makeup changes because she’s the happy version again. Fiend’s LET ME IN ends the show.

Overall Rating: F. Last week officially started the 29th year of Raw and I don’t remember the last time I was this angry while watching the show. This episode had more bad acting, bad ideas, bad segments and bad pretty much everything than I can remember. Outside of AJ vs. Ricochet and McIntyre’s promo (which wasn’t great but it sounded like him saying his own words), there was nothing on here that either made me want to watch another thing this show does.

Where do you even start? First of all, we’re getting another Ric Flair story. I know we just saw him involved with Randy Orton about six months ago, so it must be time to see him again. WWE just got done with their big Legends Raw a few weeks ago. Why is it that only Flair can get these roles? You mean to tell me that NONE of the other Legends would be able to be put into a spot like this? It seems that we get at least a Flair story a year and other than HHH loving the guy, I have no idea why that needs to be the case.

Then you have the double talk shows, which served the following purposes: to show that Alexa, who has been creepy for months, is creepy and to show that Miz and Morrison, who are known to be bragging idiots, are bragging idiots. It comes off as a blatant way to fill in three hours a week, all while you have how many people sitting on the sidelines for months on end?

Maybe we could put some of them into a team so they can argue. I mean we only did it with Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler, the Hurt Business and Elias/Jaxson Ryker this week so there’s plenty of room for more. It nothing else it frees up creative from having to come up with something fresh, so maybe they can think of something else for Flair to do so he can have a bonus check.

Why are so many people having to do the same things over and over again, often on the same show? Every show but Raw has the ability to come up with a storyline for people (even 205 Live can pull off the bare basics). Here though? Same people doing the same stuff every week. If you need Flair around that often, ask him to tell you two angles he remembers from 1983 and redo them, then go talk to Flair again when they’re done.

This show didn’t make me want to see the Rumble and it didn’t make me want to watch Raw next week. I know NXT isn’t what it once was, but it’s still miles better than this. Smackdown is one of the best shows on television every week and they make stuff like this look easy. I can’t imagine that adding an extra hour in is that much of a game changer, so please find a way to fix this. It’s a Raw problem instead of a WWE problem, so figure this stuff out already.

Results

Charlotte b. Peyton Royce – Figure Eight

Mace b. Xavier Woods – Spinning torture rack slam

Shayna Baszler b. Mandy Rose – Kirifuda Clutch

AJ Styles b. Ricochet – Styles Clash

Hurt Business b. Riddle/Lucha House Party – Hurt Lock to Metalik

Jeff Hardy b. Jaxson Ryker via DQ when Elias interfered

Alexa Bliss b. Asuka – Sister Abigail

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Backlash 2016 (2021 Redo): History Has Been Made (x3)

Backlash 2016
Date: September 11, 2016
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Mauro Ranallo, David Otunga

For some reason someone wanted me to look at this again and I’m really not sure why. I don’t often get requests for modern shows and while I can remember the show, I’m not sure what to expect here. It isn’t quite a major card but for the main event does have some meaning. This is also the first Smackdown pay per view after the Brand Split so there are some inaugural champions to be decided. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Apollo Crews vs. Baron Corbin

Both of them have only been on the main roster for about five and a half months at this point and this is WAY before Corbin became a thing. Corbin shoves him around to start and then does it again for a bonus. An exchange of shoulders goes to Corbin so Crews goes to the apron. One heck of a right hand puts Crews on the floor and we take a break. Back with Crews kicking away and hitting his jumping clothesline. The Stinger Splash connects but Corbin hits the under the rope clothesline to take Crews down.

One heck of a clothesline gives Corbin two but Crews is right back with a dropkick. The standing moonsault gets two and an Angle Slam gets the same to put them both down again. Deep Six catches Crews for another near fall as they’re going back and forth here. They head outside with Corbin crashing hard into the steps and Crews hammers away back inside. Corbin shoves him off the ropes though and the End of Days is good for the pin at 9:55.

Rating: C+. I’m really not big on Corbin but these two had a heck of a nice match here, which I wouldn’t have expected from these two in this spot. They were going back and forth for just under ten minutes and both guys looked rather nice in the process. I can see why Corbin went somewhere, but it went in such a completely wrong direction that the whole thing fell apart. Crews…..yeah I still can’t explain the whole thing.

The opening video is a text crawl talking about the September 11 attacks from fifteen years earlier. It couldn’t be anything else.

The regular opening video talks about how Smackdown is crowning two inaugural champions here, plus looking at the bigger matches. All as usual in other words.

Here’s Smackdown Commissioner Shane McMahon to get things going because that’s how you open a pay per view. General Manager Daniel Bryan (erg the days of two bosses per show) comes out to join him and it’s time to welcome the fans to the show. Shane talks about all of their ratings success and Bryan runs down the card, in case you just strolled into a pay per view.

Women’s Title: Becky Lynch vs. Natalya vs. Naomi vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Carmella vs. Nikki Bella

This is an elimination match for the inaugural title. Becky gets a big pop and Carmella has been attacking Nikki coming into this. It’s a big brawl to start until Becky and Naomi are left alone in the ring. Becky’s armbars don’t get her very far so Naomi does her dancing kicks, which still aren’t the best idea in the world. A big kick to Becky’s head works a bit better but she’s fine enough to backdrop Naomi outside. Carmella catches Becky on top though and a Stratusphere gets two.

Natalya and Alexa break up the Nikki vs. Carmella standoff so Nikki hits the spinning kick to Alexa for two more. Bliss sends Nikki outside so Natalya runs Bliss over but Becky is back in. Naomi comes back for a Bubba Bomb into Cattle Mutilation on Natalya but that’s broken up as well. Carmella gives Nikki a Downward Spiral into the Cone of Silence to stay on the bad neck. That’s broken up and Nikki takes her up top, only to have Natalya turn it into the Tower of Doom.

Bliss clears the ring until Becky comes back in to go after her arm. Now it’s Nikki cleaning house but Carmella breaks up her big dive. Instead Naomi hits a springboard dive onto everyone, leaving Nikki to frantically adjust her gear. Back in and Natalya loads up Bliss in a powerbomb with Naomi adding a Blockbuster for the first elimination at 9:39.

Naomi headscissors Natalya out to the floor but Nikki punches her out to the air. Natalya sends Nikki outside and the Sharpshooter makes Naomi tap at 10:46. That leaves Natalya and Carmella to team up against Nikki, who fights them both off and hits the Rack Attack 2.0 to finish Natalya at 11:53. Carmella immediately rolls Nikki up for the pin at 12:00, leaving us with Carmella vs. Becky for the title.

Hold on though as Nikki slaps Carmella first, leaving the fans to cheer for Becky even more. Carmella spends a lot of time shouting so Becky comes back with the suplexes to take over. A shot to the face drops Becky but she easily pulls Carmella into the Disarm-Her for the tap and the title at 14:15.

Rating: C+. The match was kind of all over the place at first and focused way too much on Carmella vs. Nikki (I’m as shocked as you are) instead of almost anyone else involved. They did well enough once things started clearing out a bit, but the rest of this fell into the trap of two do stuff and then the others take their place with rather limited transition. Becky winning was the only choice given her competition so at least they got the ending right.

Post match Becky thanks the fans for everything and says this is what Becky Balboa is all about.

Bray Wyatt has attacked Randy Orton and injured his knee. They face each other later tonight.

Tag Team Title Tournament Semifinals: Usos vs. Hype Bros

This is a second chance challenge match for the right to fight for the titles……or a semifinal match for all you normal people out there. American Alpha was supposed to be in the finals but the Usos attacked Chad Gable’s knee and put him on the shelf to force this match. Mojo drops into a three point stance in front of Jey and scores with an early backdrop. Back in and Mojo slams Jey down, setting up a slingshot splash to give Ryder two. Ryder hammers away in the corner but Jimmy breaks up the Broski Boot.

That’s fine with Ryder, who hits a dropkick off the apron and Mojo runs Jimmy over for a bonus. Jey sends Ryder into the buckle back inside though and it’s time for the evil Usos to take over. A backbreaker/running knee combination gets two and we hit the chinlock for a bit. The running Umaga Attack (with Mauro actually getting the name right) connects for two and the chinlock goes on again.

Ryder counters a suplex into a neckbreaker for two but Jey kicks Mojo in the head like a smart villain. As usual, that’s about it for the beatdown though as Ryder clears the ring and makes the hot tag off to Rawley to clean house. Ryder gets two off a super hurricanrana but Rawley gets sent into the barricade. That leaves the Usos to take out Ryder’s knee and the Tequila Sunrise makes Ryder tap at 10:06.

Rating: C+. I wouldn’t have expected the Hype Bros to do this well but it helps when you’re in there with the Usos. The Usos have to be in a match to crown some new champions for the sake of credibility, so it wasn’t like this was the biggest shock. It was quite the surprise that the match worked out this well, but the Hype Bros could rise up to another level when they had the chance.

Rhyno and Heath Slater are ready for the Tag Team Title match but Heath’s stomach is a bit messed up because of bad crab meat. Rhyno: “We’re still live.” Heath: “You’ve been SWERVED!”

Connor’s Cure video.

We recap the Miz defending the Intercontinental Title against Dolph Ziggler. This comes off of the near legendary Daniel Bryan “you wrestle like a coward” promo on Talking Smack, which somehow set up Ziggler getting a shot. See, Ziggler needed to prove himself (again) because being a multiple time World Champion didn’t count because….uh, reasons.

In the back, Miz tells Daniel Bryan that he wants to renegotiate his contract and that’s going to get even worse after he retains the title.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler

Miz, with Maryse is defending. Ziggler spinebusters him down to start and hammers away, sending Miz bailing to the floor early on. Back in and Ziggler easily wrestles him down for some near falls so Miz wisely goes to the ropes. A slam plants Ziggler and Miz stomps away as the pace slows a bit. Ziggler isn’t having that and snaps off some dropkicks but Miz is back with a catapult to send him throat first into the bottom rope. The bow and arrow works on Ziggler’s back before Miz catapults him out to the floor.

Miz drops him onto the barricade for two back inside as things slow down for real this time. The chinlock goes on and the comeback attempt earns Ziggler a face first toss into the corner. Miz grabs the surfboard ala Daniel Bryan and then stomps down onto Ziggler’s knees, also ala Bryan. We’ll keep up the Bryan tribute with the running corner dropkicks and YES pose, followed by the running corner clothesline.

The Skull Crushing Finale is countered though and Ziggler nails a dropkick. The clothesline comeback is on and it’s a spinebuster into right hands on Miz. Ziggler gets two off a sunset flip and sends him shoulder first into the post. Miz is right back with a sitout powerbomb before starting in on Ziggler’s knee. The Figure Four is broken up though and Ziggler grabs the sleeper as the submissions continue their trip back to 1982.

Miz slips out so Ziggler grabs the jumping DDT for two more. The superkick is countered into Miz’s short DDT and now the Figure Four can go on. Ziggler gets to the rope so Miz kicks him in the head, earning himself a superkick for a VERY close two. Miz has to be thrown back inside, allowing Maryse to get in some hairspray to the face. That’s enough to set up the Skull Crushing Finale to retain Miz’s title at 18:20.

Rating: B+. Yeah they were using a lot of basic stuff here, but they were using it in a way that made you want to see how it was going to go. Miz worked on Ziggler’s leg and Ziggler tried to set him up for the superkick. It became a bit of a chess match as they were trying to get to that final moment and that’s how you build to a climax. Heck of a match here, as Miz is still able to have this kind of a match under the right circumstances.

The Kickoff Show panel recaps the Kickoff Show in a panel discussion.

Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton

I forgot how much I missed Broken Out In Love. Actually hang on as Orton has a bad knee and can’t win, so after the ten count, Bray wins by forfeit.

Hold on though as we have a replacement for a No Holds Barred match.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

No Holds Barred. It’s a slugout to start with Kane taking him to the floor for a clothesline. Bray gets sent into the timekeeper’s area but comes out with a bell shot to the head. Back in and Bray hammers away before getting in a hard shot to the knee to cut Kane off. Some chair shots put Kane down again and then some chair shots put Kane down again. Kane comes back with a DDT onto the chair but it’s way too early for the chokeslam.

They head outside where another chokeslam is broken up, this time with a right hand to the face. The announcers’ table is loaded up and there’s a running backsplash to send Kane through it for the big crash. Back in and Sister Abigail is countered into a quick chokeslam for two. Bray manages a release Rock Bottom onto the chair but here’s Randy Orton for the RKO. Kane adds a chokeslam for the pin at 10:57.

Rating: C. Not much to see here but the point was to have Orton get one over on Bray and that worked out well enough. Kane is fine for a fill in spot like this and him beating Wyatt isn’t the biggest stretch in the world. If nothing else, it’s weird to see Wyatt in this old deal after his crazy transformation just a few weeks later.

AJ Styles talks to a few young guys and knows it by looking at them: they are destined for failure, but at least they got to meet him!

We look back at the Usos winning earlier.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Heath Slater/Rhino

For the inaugural titles and Slater/Rhino are the wacky thrown together team. The fans are behind Slater as he forearms Jey down to start. Rhino and Jimmy come in for the ECW chants and Jimmy gets knocked down with a knee to the ribs. Slater comes back in and is quickly knocked out to the floor in a heap.

We hit a….sliding chinlock (ok then) back inside but Slater it out even faster. That earns him something like a top rope Demolition Decapitator and we hit the chinlock. Slater gets driven into the corner and a legdrop makes it worse. A clothesline gets Slater out of trouble and it’s back to Rhino for the hot tag so house can be cleaned. The Gore only hits the buckle so Slater tags himself back in to DDT Jey. Jimmy makes the save but walks into the Gore, allowing Slater to get the pin and the titles at 9:56.

Rating: C-. This was just a TV match and nothing more, which isn’t exactly the most thrilling thing to see on a pay per view. Slater and Rhino winning is the right way to go as you can only get so far with the Usos winning. They’re the established team, so why waste your time with having them get another title win here? Not a bad match, but I won’t remember it in half an hour.

Post match Slater is rather pleased at getting the title (and a contract on Smackdown) because this is the biggest moment of his life. Slater: “Aside from a couple of my kids being born.” What matters most though: HE’S GETTING A DOUBLE WIDE!!!

And now, a KFC ad featuring Dolph Ziggler as Colonel Sanders beating up Miz in a chicken suit.

We recap AJ Styles challenging Dean Ambrose for the World Title. Styles beat John Cena at Summerslam and wants the World Title, though Ambrose isn’t exactly taking this seriously. He keeps telling AJ that he isn’t getting a trophy for being second best, but Styles wants the WWE Title.

Smackdown World Title: AJ Styles vs. Dean Ambrose

Ambrose is defending and is taken down in short order. Some rollups give Styles two each and it’s another early standoff. Styles wrestles him down and tells Ambrose that he owns him so Ambrose is back up with armdrags. A slam sends AJ bailing to the floor as things stop for a breather. AJ gets Ambrose to chase him though and the stomping is on, only to have Ambrose knock him outside again.

Ambrose’s suicide dive is cut off with a trip and it’s time to work on the neck. The drop down into the dropkick gets a nice reaction from the crowd, along with a two count. The jumping knee gets the same and AJ knees him in the face a few more times. Ambrose fights back but charges shoulder first into the post to cut that off in a hurry. AJ misses his own charge though and Dean hits a top rope belly to back superplex, with AJ flipping onto his face to make it worse.

A swinging Rock Bottom backbreaker gives Ambrose two and the top rope standing elbow (I’ve missed that one) hits AJ on the floor. Back in and a double chickenwing facebuster gets two more but Styles suplexes him into the corner. It’s way too early for either finisher so AJ crushes the knee in the corner to take over again. The leg cranking is on so Ambrose uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom.

Not that it matters as AJ is right back with the Calf Crusher, with Ambrose having to make the crawl to the rope. The hold goes on again so this time Ambrose bounces his head off the mat for the break. Ambrose has to climb the ropes to escape the Styles Clash so they head to the apron, where a heck of a catapult sends AJ into the heck of a hard post. Back in and Ambrose gets two off la majistral, only to get caught in the fireman’s carry backbreaker.

AJ: “Let’s see if he gets up from this one.” The springboard 450 connects and we do see Ambrose get up from this one. Ambrose slugs away and hits a running dropkick to put AJ on the floor again. Now the big dive can connect and AJ is thrown over the barricade. The running dive from the announcers’ tables over the barricade drops AJ and the rebound lariat does it again back inside. Dirty Deeds is broken up and the referee gets bumped, allowing AJ to hit a low blow into the Styles Clash for the pin and the title at 24:57.

Rating: A-. I really liked this one as they built up the story of Ambrose being a wild brawler and AJ slowly reeling him in for the catch because Styles is that much better. The leg work was good, though Ambrose kind of dropped it near the end. Styles had to get the title here and WWE was smart enough to not do something crazy like try to stretch it out. This was the right call with the right choice and the match was pretty great.

AJ looks very pleased that he won and poses to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a rather good show here and Smackdown gets off to a nice start. They did the historical stuff with the title changes and there was nothing bad throughout the card. I wasn’t expecting much out of this show and I barely remembered the thing in the first place so this was a heck of a nice surprise. Very good show here and the main event is worth seeing for some nice storytelling.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – January 11, 2021: A Hot Ending To A Sad Coronavirus Anniversary

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 11, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

And then everything changed as Drew McIntyre was diagnosed with the Coronavirus, meaning that whatever was planned for this week has been thrown out the window in exchange for something to be named later. We have a few more weeks to go before the Royal Rumble and now they are going to need to have a backup plan just in case. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s HHH to get things going, complete with soaking in the canned cheers Before he can get very far, Randy Orton cuts him off. Orton says the office is here to do what Drew McIntyre couldn’t do. HHH confirms that Orton vs. McIntyre isn’t happening tonight so HHH has two options: make Orton #30 in the Royal Rumble or just hand him the WWE Title right now.

HHH says Orton is only going to be champion if he wins the Royal Rumble. The threats start but HHH doesn’t want to hear them because he’s glad to have the old Randy Orton back. He saw Orton light Bray Wyatt on fire and was never prouder, because he would have done the same thing.

At the same time though, HHH doesn’t understand Orton’s obsession with destroying legends like Big Show, Mark Henry, Shawn Michaels and Ric Flair. Why do it when it doesn’t even benefit you? All that did was take the pride away because it shows that Orton is a no good pr***.

Orton asks if HHH has it in him one more time, but HHH says no because there is no benefit to him. Before HHH leaves, Orton asks if that is because Stephanie isn’t here tonight so HHH can’t get his testicular fortitude out of her purse. A right hand puts Orton on the floor and he smiles, saying that must be a yes. HHH whispering a lot aside, this worked fine enough as a way to set up a makeshift main event.

We look back at Ric Flair costing Charlotte a tag match last week.

Charlotte doesn’t want to talk about Ric, because Lacey Evans isn’t the first or last woman to hit on him. She doesn’t understand why we’re talking about her dad when she is about to wrestle a match in 2021, meaning it’s time to go to the ring.

Lacey Evans says Charlotte needs to have a sweet tea on the front porch. Ric Flair liked the flirting last week and Lacey could go for that kind of sugar. She dedicates the match to Ric and blows him a kiss, complete with a bit of swooning.

Drew McIntyre joins us via video and says that it’s true he has been diagnosed with Coronavirus. He’s one of the people with no symptoms, but if he can get it, anyone can. So wear your masks and practice social distancing, and he’ll be back really soon. Has anyone in WWE officially announced a positive diagnoses on TV before this?

Charlotte vs. Lacey Evans

Charlotte knocks her down to start as commentary shifts into Royal Rumble hype. The Figure Four Necklock goes on with Lacey’s face being rammed into the mat and then Charlotte rolls her over a few times. Charlotte takes it into the corner to crash down onto the knee but Lacey bails to the floor. Cue Ric Flair, who is looking rather happy, as we take a break.

Back with Charlotte hitting some shoulders in the corner but Lacey knocks her down, throws in a strut, and drives Charlotte’s head into the mat. Charlotte fights back up and hits a clothesline into the neckbreaker. Lacey gets booted in the face and Natural Selection connects, but Flair puts the boot on the rope. Flair says he isn’t home and he’s not staying home before tripping Charlotte on a suplex attempt. He even holds the leg down so Lacey can get the pin at 12:24.

Rating: D+. This is another case where you kind of have to wonder who this is being booked for. Is it just that Flair was bored at home and wanted something to do? I only ask because this isn’t exactly boosting Charlotte and while it might help Lacey a bit, there are how many people sitting at home while Flair gets ANOTHER story? It doesn’t help that Charlotte was mostly destroying her until the finish, but Lacey did need the win.

Post break Lacey and Ric head to the hotel.

We look at Drew McIntyre retaining the WWE Title over Keith Lee last week.

Sheamus compliments Lee on his effort last week but Lee doesn’t want to hear it. Cue Miz and Morrison to brag about the briefcase so Sheamus calls them Dumb and Dumber. The match is made for later as Miz and Morrison remind me more of Bulk and Skull every week.

Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

Actually hang on as Elias says he got hurt in the recording studio, so Jaxson Ryker is taking his place.

Jeff Hardy vs. Jaxson Ryker

Ryker says Elias uses his music to create, but Ryker is going to destroy. Jeff gets stomped in the corner but avoids a charge. The Twist of Fate (swinging neckbreaker in this case) connects but Elias offers a distraction so Ryker can grab a rollup with pants for the pin at 48 seconds.

Post match Hardy tells Elias to bring it so Elias tells Ryker not to interfere.

Jeff Hardy vs. Elias

Joined in progress with Hardy kneeing him down but having the Twist of Fate broken up. The Whisper in the Wind gives Hardy two but Elias’ jumping knee into a swinging neckbreaker gets the same. Hardy is back up with the Twist of Fate and the Swanton connects for the pin at 3:56.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here as they already seem to be planting seeds for Elias and Ryker’s split. To be fair, it has been like a month or so already and that’s enough time for such a partnership. Hardy wrestling two matches (a stretch but true) in a row makes a bit more sense now, even if they’re to the split this soon.

We look at Orton/HHH again.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Keith Lee/Sheamus

Morrison’s headlock doesn’t work on Sheamus, who takes him down with a drop toehold. Lee comes in to work on Morrison’s arm but a quick forearm allows the tag to Miz. Morrison is tossed onto Miz on the floor and it’s back to Sheamus for a double clothesline off the apron. Back in and Lee sends Morrison flying, followed by a hard whip into the corner. That’s enough to break the turnbuckle so we take a break.

We come back with the turnbuckle repairman earning his pair and Lee whipping Miz into the same corner. This one doesn’t work as well so Sheamus knocks Morrison off the apron. That’s enough of a distraction for Miz to get one off his DDT, setting up some left hands. Morrison grabs a chinlock but has to switch to a gator roll to keep Morrison away from Lee.

A big boot rocks Sheamus but he hit the Irish Curse to cut Miz off. Lee comes in to start running people over with the big shoulders before just throwing Morrison at Miz. Morrison’s Flying Chuck is knocked out of the air but Sheamus tags himself back in to hit the Brogue Kick for the pin at 12:54.

Rating: C. This worked out well enough, including a unique enough spot with the rope breaking to send us to a commercial. Lee and Sheamus teaming for a bit before having a hoss fight is fine, as it gives them something to do and they could be a fun team. It’s nice to see Miz and Morrison get beaten up too, with Lee throwing Morrison at Miz being a cool visual.

HHH talks about how Randy Orton insulted Ric Flair and yeah, he’ll fight Orton tonight. He’s here in a business capacity, but he’ll fight because he wants to know if he would have lit the match.

Sheamus vs. Keith Lee

So much for the waiting. They chop it out to start with Lee getting the better of things, only to be sent out to the floor. Lee suplexes him into the timekeeper’s area but Sheamus dives back in at nine. Sheamus sends him shoulder first into the post and starts stomping away on the arm to keep Lee down.

The armbar goes on for a bit but Lee powers his way to freedom. That’s broken up with a kick to the face so Sheamus goes up, only to get caught on top. A superplex is broken up and Sheamus hits a top rope clothesline. Lee pops back up so it’s a jumping knee for two, followed by another armbar. That’s broken up with a powerbomb, followed by the Spirit Bomb to finish Sheamus at 6:53.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. So they’ve had a tag match and then a singles match, which I’m sure will lead to either another tag or singles match between the two of them. I can’t complain all that much here as it’s nice to see Lee win some matches, and Sheamus is good for a fight, but they can’t stretch this out for a few weeks?

We look at the end of last week’s show, with Goldberg challenging Drew McIntyre for the Royal Rumble title match.

We look at….the end of last week’s show, with Drew McIntyre defeating Keith Lee and then Goldberg making the Rumble challenge.

Drew talks about how he was surprised by Goldberg last week. He and his brother were both Goldberg fans growing up but Goldberg messed with his legacy last week. Goldberg put words in his mouth and then said Drew was thinking them. Drew respects the legends and if Goldberg wants to prove something, they’re on for the Royal Rumble. Goldberg is next.

Riddle compares winning the US Title to eating a pizza with a lot of cheese as the Lucha House Party is rather confused. They tell him to watch his back, but he thinks that’s impossible.

Xavier Woods vs. T-Bar

Woods is on his own (saying Kofi Kingston is injured) and T-Bar (with the rest of Retribution) shoves him around to start. A heck of a clothesline gives T-Bar two and we hit the nerve hold. Woods fights up and chops away before avoiding a charge in the corner. There’s an enziguri to rock T-Bar again, followed by a missile dropkick to the floor. Mace offers a distraction so T-Bar can work on Woods’ arm, setting up Feast Your Eyes (now known as Eyes Wide Shut) for the pin at 3:53.

Rating: C-. It’s nice to see T-Bar and Retribution on a bit of a winning streak for a change, though it’s still kind of hard to believe that anything is going to last. The team just feels so worthless anymore and there is a good chance that they are never going to get out of this hole. At least they’re doing something though, and maybe they can do something better in the future.

Orton is ready to channel his hatred into beating HHH.

We look at Orton challenging HHH again.

US Title: Riddle vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP, is defending and jumps Riddle before the bell. Riddle confirms he can go so we officially start, despite his mouth being busted open. Lashley drops him ribs first onto the top rope to send things outside but Riddle is right back with a Floating Bro to the floor. Back in and the Final Flash is countered into a spinebuster as Lashley is getting fired up. The Hurt Lock goes on and Riddle taps at 1:59.

Post match Riddle says he wants MVP, who is game for a fight of his own.

Riddle vs. MVP

MVP is in street clothes but is fine enough to hit Ballin for two. Riddle fights back with the forearms in the corner but Lashley comes in with the spear for the DQ at 1:23.

Post match Lashley beats Riddle down again.

We look at Adam Pearce becoming #1 contender to Roman Reigns thanks to Roman Reigns.

AJ Styles talks to Pearce and says if he catches lightning in a bottle, he can face AJ at Wrestlemania and lose the Universal Title. Drew Gulak pops up to ask to be in the Royal Rumble, but Pearce says Drew can’t just put himself in. Gulak: “Why not? AJ did.” AJ asks who Gulak has beaten so Gulak pulls out a flash drive of his victories. Instead Pearce says Gulak is in if he can beat AJ next.

AJ Styles vs. Drew Gulak

Omos is here with Styles. Gulak starts fast with a rollup for two, followed by a tiger driver for the same. Back up and AJ scores with the Pele kick before shoving Gulak over the top to the floor. Omos puts his foot down next to Gulak’s face (giving us a great bugged out eye look, plus a sweet panning up camera shot on Omos) until AJ comes over to throw him back inside. The Phenomenal Forearm finishes Gulak at 3:11.

Rating: C-. As usual, Gulak looked fine while he had a chance but it wasn’t that much of a chance. I like Gulak more and more almost every time I see him but I think he has firmly hit his ceiling. The match was slightly more competitive than I was expecting, even if the ending was never in any serious doubt.

Video on Goldberg.

Keith Lee offers HHH his services against Randy Orton but HHH has this. Lee hands him his leather jacket.

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke

Mandy and Dana are both in the Rumble. Dana’s headlock on Shayna doesn’t work so well as Nia tags herself in and runs Dana over. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Dana fights up and brings in Mandy. Shayna is driven into the corner but Nia gets in a cheap shot to cut her off again. The Samoan drop gets two as Dana makes the save so Baszler grabs the Kirifuda Clutch for the tap at 3:20.

Rating: D+. You know, for a show where the roster is so depleted, you might want to have a few more matches go longer than four minutes. Jax and Baszler continue to dominate while we keep waiting on Rose and Brooke to take over. Then again that might not make Jax look like the most dominant woman ever so why would we want to go in that direction?

HHH vs. Randy Orton

HHH is in street clothes and we have neither a bell nor a referee. They slug it out to start with Orton getting the better of things before heading outside. HHH whips him into the steps and then near the announcers’ table to take over. That means it’s sledgehammer time, but then the lights start going out. HHH pulls back the sledgehammer….which is now on fire. The lights go out and HHH disappears but we’ve got a distorted version of the Firefly Fun House theme. Cue Alexa Bliss in the corner and she throws a huge fireball at Orton’s face. Orton holds his face and screams a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I know it’s a show no one was going to watch with the football game on and they seem to have been wrecked by a mixture of Coronavirus and injuries, but sweet goodness people. Look at what you have available here and tell me how this is the best show you can put on.

There were ten matches on this show (not counting HHH vs. Orton which was a brawl instead of a match) and seven of them didn’t break four minutes. Maybe try a longer match instead of just replaying the same clips over and over for a change? I can expect that out of a budget promotion like MLW but this is supposed to be the top company around. You have enough people available here and yet four people have to wrestle twice? Even with the situation they were in, WWE can do so much more than this and seeing them punt AGAIN made for a very long three hours.

Results

Lacey Evans b. Charlotte – Pin with Ric Flair holding the foot

Jaxson Ryker b. Jeff Hardy – Rollup with tights

Jeff Hardy b. Elias – Swanton Bomb

Sheamus/Keith Lee b. Miz/John Morrison – Brogue Kick to Morrison

Keith Lee b. Sheamus – Spirit Bomb

T-Bar b. Xavier Woods – Eyes Wide Shut

Bobby Lashley b. Riddle – Hurt Lock

Riddle b. MVP via DQ when Bobby Lashley interfered

AJ Styles b. Drew Gulak – Phenomenal Forearm

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler b. Mandy Rose/Dana Brooke – Kirifuda Clutch to Rose




Monday Night Raw – January 4, 2021: Did They Forget To Change The Script?

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 4, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

It’s another major show with another Legends reunion. This time around the focus is on Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair and Torrie Wilson for some reason but other than that, it seems like they are in for a bunch of appearances. Other than that, we have Keith Lee challenging Drew McIntyre for the WWE Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a shot of Hulk Hogan’s picture on the back of a phone. Hogan introduces it as the H Phone, which can let you YouTube, Instagram, Tweet and even make a phone call. Hulk says you can even use it for a phone call. Posing ensues.

It’s time for MizTV with John Morrison listing off all of tonight’s legends. The guests this week are the New Day, who say they have their own talk show called New Day Talks. Xavier Woods serves as the band, with Miz not being sure what to make of this. Now it’s Woods turning into the bailiff for the first question: What are your New Year’s Resolutions? Morrison wants to graduate from hibachi school and take a photo every day so he can do one of those cool photo montages at the end of the year.

Miz isn’t pleased so Kofi asks the next question: which legend would you like to have dinner with? Morrison: “Tatanka. Definitely Tatanka.” That means it’s time for the cooking portion of the show but Miz erupt Miz erupts. Cue Teddy Long for our first cameo to say he has an idea: Miz and Morrison can face THE UNDERTAKER. That brings out Adam Pearce for a correction, so maybe we can just have a tag team match, next. Teddy didn’t exactly sound as usual here, as he was rushing through his stuff. If this is their best idea to open the show, they deserve to lose every fan they have.

New Day vs. Miz/John Morrison

Woods runs Morrison over to start and hands it off to Kofi for more of the same. It’s already back to Woods but Miz comes in to knee him in the ribs. Kofi comes back in with the spinning crossbody for two and there’s a kick to Miz’s chest. Morrison misses the running shooting star press though and a dropkick to the chest gives Kofi two. Miz and Morrison are sent outside for the big dive from Kofi and we take a break.

Back with Morrison kicking Kofi in the head and handing it to Miz for the left hands. Miz cranks on both arms so Kofi fights up, earning himself a knee to the ribs. The Figure Four is countered into the SOS, which is enough for the hot tag to Woods. House is cleaned, including the discus forearm to Morrison. Kofi dives off the steps with an ax handle to Miz and a Shining Wizard finishes Morrison at 13:16.

Rating: C+. The action was good but this wasn’t exactly an inspiring tag match to get things going. Miz and Morrison are a better choice in the ring than either of them on their own, though I could still go for more than this as a way to start off what is supposed to be a special show. It could have been on any given show and that’s not a good sign.

We recap Randy Orton almost setting Alexa Bliss on fire last week.

Orton says he wanted to do it last week but he couldn’t make himself go there. Maybe that is the change that the Fiend has brought on him because he showed restraint and compassion. He hates himself for it but that means he can sculpt that anger into being anything and everything. Can you imagine if he directs that newfound hatred for himself towards someone else? He doesn’t want to talk about the Fiend, because he wants to go talk to some legends about why he is the Legend Killer.

We look at Angel Garza winning the 24/7 Title from R-Truth at the New Year’s Eve celebration.

Garza hits on Alicia Fox but thinks that his title is more beautiful than she is. He moves on to Sgt. Slaughter, Tatanka and Mickie James, but Slaughter smells the rose and calls him a maggot. And that’s probably the last we’ll see of all of them.

AJ Styles vs. Elias

Omos and Jaxson Ryker are here as AJ takes him to the mat with a headlock to start. Elias comes back with some chops as we hear that AJ will be in the Royal Rumble. A Stun Gun cuts AJ off again and Elias gorilla presses him onto the turnbuckle. There’s a clothesline to knock AJ outside and we take a break.

Back with Elias hitting a chokeslam for two, with Ryker looking rather pleased at his influence. AJ gets in a shot of his own but the Phenomenal Forearm is kneed out of the air for a rather near fall. That’s enough for AJ, who counters an electric chair with a hurricane into the corner. A brainbuster sets up the Styles Clash to finish Elias at 7:35.

Rating: C. This was a good bit shorter than last week’s match and while it wasn’t great, it was a nice showcase for Elias. He might not be the most polished in the ring but putting him in the ring with AJ is going to make him look good. Having Ryker be a bit of an influence is a way to go and this worked well enough on most points.

Post match Ryker brings in the guitar but Omos comes in to kick it out of his hands. Ryker panics and leaves with Elias.

Charlotte is in the Royal Rumble.

Riddle tries to get Big Show to become the Big Bro. Show likes the idea and tells Riddle to keep thinking as Riddle leaves. Randy Orton comes in to remind Show what happened when they met last time. Show says he’s ready to go right now so Orton grabs him by the throat and Show sits down. He isn’t falling for Orton trying to get him to do something foolish because Show isn’t ashamed to be a legend. Orton leaves and Show simmers.

Charlotte/Asuka vs. Peyton Royce/Lacey Evans

Non-title and Ric Flair is here with Charlotte and Asuka. Lacey now has a Lacey The Legend hat to make it a special night. Charlotte takes Peyton down to start so Lacey comes in for a wave to Ric. The chase is on outside until Peyton gets in a few cheap shots on the way back in. The double teaming works for a bit but Charlotte hits Evans with a Downward Spiral in the corner.

Asuka comes in with a missile dropkick but gets knocked outside. That lets Evans seem to hit on Ric, earning herself a slap from Charlotte. The brawl is on and we take a break. Back with Asuka getting stomped down in the corner and Lacey grabbing a chinlock. Asuka fights up and hits a running clothesline to drop Royce, allowing the double tag to Evans and Charlotte.

Back to back fall away slams put Royce and Evans down, setting up the moonsault onto both of them. Asuka tags herself in though and hits a Shining Wizard for two on Royce. Charlotte tags herself in as well and it’s a Codebreaker from Asuka into a mostly missed Natural Selection on Royce. That’s broken up but Evans stops to hit on Ric again, who seems intrigued. Charlotte breaks that up but Ric accidentally trips her, allowing Royce to grab a crucifix for the pin at 12:33.

Rating: C-. Well at least one of the legends finally did something, even if it was a mistake. I would bet on this being more about Flair than anyone else, because WWE has a tendency to make every story about him in one way or another. Hopefully it means a way to get the titles off of Asuka and Charlotte, because it’s not like they need them in any way./

Post match Evans kisses Ric on the cheek as Ric is upset. Charlotte gets in his face and says stay out of her business. The crushed Flair leaves again, because we needed to do this story for at least a second time.

Sheamus fires Drew McIntyre up for the main event and says kick Keith Lee in the head one extra time. Cue Hulk Hogan and Jimmy Hart to say he’s a big fan of Sheamus. He also says Drew is a great champion who reminds him of himself. Drew thanks him for the praise and asks if Sheamus reminds him of Jimmy. Hart: “I can see the resemblance!” Jimmy Hart is a national treasure. Sheamus offers to have drinks with Hulk and Drew, but not Jimmy, earning himself a shouting from the megaphone. Drew and Hogan hit the catchphrase after a nice endorsement (ignore that Hogan’s arms are still bigger than Drew’s).

Riddle vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and MVP is here with Lashley. Riddle jumps him before the bell and we’re ready to go with Lashley sending him into the corner to start fast. A hurricanrana out of the corner puts Lashley on the floor but he catches Riddle in a fireman’s carry. Lashley drives him HARD into the post and we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of a chinlock but getting blasted with a clothesline.

Lashley hammers away in the corner but the spinning Dominator is countered, allowing Riddle to hit the kick to the chest. The Final Flash gives Riddle one but Lashley catches him on top. The Dominator connects for no cover as Lashley goes with the Hurt Lock. Riddle tries to fight out and bounces off the ropes, with the referee having to duck. That means the referee doesn’t see Riddle tap, making Lashley let go. Lashley doesn’t get why he didn’t win and gets rolled up for the pin at 9:07.

Rating: C. It was energized while it lasted and the ending likely sets up a title rematch at the Rumble. What mattered most here was commentary asking if Riddle was really giving up or if it was a way to sneak in a win. Just putting that idea out there makes Riddle look far stronger and keeps him looking a lot stronger going into the probably title match.

Mark Henry, on a scooter, tells Ricochet to stay with it. Ricochet leaves and here’s Orton to pop up and enter the Royal Rumble. He asks if Henry is entering as well but sees that he won’t be able to due to whatever is wrong with his leg. Henry is ready to leave but Orton threatens him. That means Henry can either leave right now or have Orton strike. A dejected Henry leaves.

MVP insists that Riddle quit so there is no controversy. Lashley promises punishment.

Mandy Rose vs. Shayna Baszler

Baszler jumps her during the entrance and beats the heck out of Mandy, meaning it’s Dana Brooke running in for the save. We have a replacement.

Dana Brooke vs. Shayna Baszler

The Kirifuda Clutch goes on but Dana reverses into a rollup for the pin at 36 seconds.

Post match Mandy has to save Dana from the Kirifuda Clutch and a flapjack plants Shayna.

Ric Flair talks to IRS and Molly Holly when Randy Orton pops up. IRS and Molly leave so Orton asks Flair to walk the aisle with him tonight. Don’t worry, because Orton isn’t going to let Flair screw up again. Flair says no because Orton has done it himself, sending Orton into a rant about how much better Charlotte is than Flair himself. Flair is crushed, again.

We look at Keith Lee becoming #1 contender.

Riddle comes up to Lee to give him a bit of a pep talk. Lee thanks him but doesn’t seem to want to talk.

Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy

Orton pokes him in the eye to start and takes it to the floor. That lets him drop Hardy onto the announcers’ table a few times before going after the arm back inside. Hardy hits a clothesline but Orton knocks him out of the corner and hits the circle stomp. The chinlock goes on but Hardy neckbreakers his way to freedom. Orton rolls to the floor so Hardy hits a running clothesline off the apron to send us to a break.

Back with Orton grabbing the chinlock again but this time he puts his finger in Hardy’s ear gauges to pull rather hard. With that let go, Orton drops the knee for two instead. We hit another chinlock before Orton just opts to hammer Hardy down again. Hardy fights up and this time hits a basement dropkick for his own two. There’s the Whisper in the Wind for the same and Orton is sent to the floor for a dropkick through the ropes. The hanging DDT catches Hardy on the way back in though and the RKO finishes Hardy at 12:12.

Rating: C. I’m going to have to downgrade this one a bit as the ear gauge thing was hard to watch. Orton beating Hardy is going to keep him strong and it’s not like Hardy is going to lose anything by taking a fall here. Hopefully there is something else from Orton with the legends later though, because this wasn’t much in the way of being more evil and violent.

Lucha House Party runs into Melina, who does their dance.

Lucha House Party vs. Hurt Business

Non-title and MVP is on commentary. Metalik headscissors Benjamin down to start but the rope walk dropkick is countered into a nice powerbomb. Dorado comes in with a middle rope hurricane on Alexander, who snaps off a Michinoku Driver. The Golden Rewind sends Alexander bailing to the corner for the tag to Benjamin and the pace picks up. A jumping knee sends Metalik tot he floor but Shelton and Cedric get in a bit of an argument over the tags. That’s enough to let Dorado crucifix Shelton for the pin at 2:52 (same exact way the other Tag Team Champions lost an hour ago).

Post match MVP yells at them to get on the same page. THEY HAVE BEEN CHAMPIONS FOR TWO WEEKS!

Nikki Cross is talking to Torrie Wilson when Angel Garza comes up to offer Torrie a rose. Torrie says she’s talking to Nikki but sends Garza down the hall to meet Kylie Jenner and Cardi B. It’s actually the Boogeyman, who scares Garza into a rollup to give R-Truth the 24/7 Title back. Truth leaves with the ladies and Ron Simmons comes up for the catchphrase.

Raw World Title: Drew McIntyre vs. Keith Lee

Lee is challenging and walks through the legends (including Booker T. and Jeff Jarrett) to get here. They shove each other around to start and run the ropes, with Lee not quite getting high enough on a leapfrog. He’s fast enough to drop down as Drew comes back though (that was a smooth save) and then forearm him out to the floor. Lee follows him out and hits the big Pounce to knock Drew over the barricade.

Back from a break with Lee driving in elbows and shoulders in the corner to keep Drew in trouble. Lee slams him down to stay on the bad ribs for two and McIntyre’s belly to belly attempts are blocked. McIntyre finally sends him into the corner though and NOW the belly to belly connects (for some Legends applause). A neckbreaker sets up McIntyre’s nip up but Lee plants him with a spinebuster.

They head outside again with Drew managing a powerbomb off the apron, with Lee’s back hitting the edge of the announcers’ table as he crashes through to take us to a break. Back with the two of them going up top, with Lee hitting a freaking Spanish Fly for two, because he can just do something like that. The Spirit Bomb is countered though and the Claymore retains the title at 21:13.

Rating: B+. This was the kind of hoss/how are they doing that kind of match and if you ignore the times where they nearly killed/horribly injured each other, it was a heck of a fight. I’m a bit surprised by the ending, but Lee got a lot out of this and looked like a threat. If they can follow up on that, it might go somewhere for him, but that hasn’t quite been the case yet. Heck of a match here though.

Post match McIntyre grabs the mic but here’s Goldberg to interrupt. Goldberg says McIntyre has a lot of things going for him, except for respect. McIntyre doesn’t respect those legends so that’s where Goldberg steps in. He isn’t demanding anything like a match at the Royal Rumble, but Drew seems interested.

They go head to head and Goldberg shoves him down….as we cut to Straight Up Steve Austin because we’re out of time. On a show that is THREE HOURS LONG, they manage to go over (for the second time in three weeks). That takes talent. Not as much talent as making up a character trait for McIntyre, but still talent.

This was horribly dumb, as McIntyre spent the entire summer defending the legends from Orton but now, because they need a story for the Rumble, he disrespects them? That’s not how writing a story works, but I don’t think WWE quite understands it that way. I did see a theory that said it was the script they had for Goldberg confronting Reigns and just changed the opponents. It’s just a fan theory but….would you put it past them?

Overall Rating: C-. The main event bailed out a lot of this show, but the ending segment brought it right back down. This was another one of those shows where the legends are just there for the sake of saying hi for two seconds and then it’s back to everything else, making them feel really out of place. If that’s the case, why bring them in? Was anyone going to miss Tatanka, IRS (who sure got over his son being burned alive a few weeks ago in a hurry) or Alicia Fox? Or about half a dozen other “legends?” Just say Hogan and Flair and a few others are back (and don’t have at least eight names advertised not show up).

Other than that, this was a pretty bad show otherwise, as it had four straight matches end with some kind of a rollup, with two of those having the same finish. The Rumble is looking all over the place at this point and Goldberg vs. McIntyre isn’t exactly a thrilling addition. Next week is going to get smoked by the college football title game, but after a show like this, how many people were going to be watching anyway? The show was much more lame than terrible, but that’s probably a lot worse in this case.

Results

New Day b. Miz/John Morrison – Shining Wizard to Morrison

AJ Styles b. Elias – Styles Clash

Lacey Evans/Peyton Royce b. Charlotte/Asuka – Crucifix to Charlotte

Riddle b. Bobby Lashley – Rollup

Dana Brooke b. Shayna Baszler – Rollup

Lucha House Party b. Hurt Business – Crucifix to Benjamin

Randy Orton b. Jeff Hardy – RKO

Drew McIntyre b. Keith Lee – Claymore

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

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Main Event – December 24, 2020: Merry Almost After Christmas

Main Event
Date: December 24, 2020
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe

It’s a holiday show and I doubt that actually means anything around here. This isn’t quite the show that is going to mean all that much but at least they have some Christmas trees. Granted I’m a week late watching it so the lack of Christmas makes me sad but maybe the show can make it better. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Reckoning vs. Nikki Cross

The rest of Retribution is here too. Cross grabs some armdrags to put Reckoning down but she’s right back up with a clothesline. Another shot in the corner gives Reckoning two and it’s time to choke on the ropes. A dropkick cuts off Cross’ comeback attempt and it’s off to an old bow and arrow. That’s broken up as well and Cross hits some clotheslines, setting up the running crossbody in the corner. Reckoning hits a dropkick into the corner though and she ties up Cross’ arm to drive a knee into the face for the pin at 5:15.

Rating: C-. Just a match here but it’s nice to see someone other than the same band of people they’ve had on this show for so many months now. The wrestling was fine enough but I’m still not big on that finish. It always looks weird and not exactly like a knockout, but at least Reckoning won something else.

We look at Charlotte returning at TLC.

From Raw.

Lacey Evans/Peyton Royce vs. Asuka/Charlotte

Non-title. Royce is caught in the Asuka Lock fifteen seconds in with Evans having to make a save. Asuka kicks Lacey in the ribs as we see Baszler and Jax watching from the back. Royce gets in a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Asuka in trouble but Lacey and Peyton get in an argument, allowing Asuka to suplex her way over for the tag to Charlotte. Chops abound and a big boot drops Royce. Charlotte gets pulled into a half crab though and Evans tries to play defense, only to have Asuka slip in for the save. Asuka kicks Lacey down and the Figure Eight finishes Royce at 8:03.

Rating: C. Just a quick win to keep Asuka and Charlotte hot after their title win last night. The team should be fine as a dream team for a little while, but I’m not sure who is supposed to take the titles other than Baszler and Jax. That can work for the time being though, as it’s not like the titles are regularly defended in the first place. On the other side, it’s nice to see that we are getting closer to the Iiconics reunion every single week.

We look at Randy Orton setting the Fiend on fire at TLC.

From Raw.

Here’s Randy Orton for a chat. He has been called sick, twisted, deranged and demented and last night, he showed he was all of those things when he burned the Fiend alive. Orton is not a normal man and he enjoyed every single second of what he did. He kneels down to look at the exact spot where it happened and says he can smell it if he closes his eyes. Orton: “Burning flesh has a tendency to linger.” Last night he couldn’t sleep because the voices in his head were gone.

All that he could hear instead was the Fiend gasping for breath and the flames got hotter. Orton says the Fiend is no more and he is the evil son of a b**** who took him out. Speaking of out, the lights go out and Alexa Bliss, on a swing set is in the ring. Bliss says he built this for her and now it’s Alexa’s Playground. Orton is probably wondering where He is. Maybe He is at a tanning salon or at the beach or maybe he’s at his favorite restaurant, eating his favorite food (Bliss: “Barbecue!”).

But Orton is right: it was right here where you can still see and smell what happened to the Fiend. It’s almost like Fiend was absorbed into the mat and now he’s home in the earth. But if he ever leaves home, he’ll come back to Alexa’s Playground and it’ll be like nothing Orton has ever seen. The lights go out again and…..we look at commentary. As usual, WWE is horrible at building up tension as this could have taken six weeks but instead it took one day. Just let us believe that Fiend could be gone instead of all but saying “yeah he’ll be back” the next night.

Lince Dorado vs. Akira Tozawa

Dorado works on the arm to start so Tozawa does the same thing. Another armbar takes Tozawa down so this time Tozawa hits him in the face. Back up and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker plants Tozawa but he knocks Dorado to the floor as we take a break. We come back with Tozawa chopping away for two and elbowing him in the face for the same.

Tozawa grabs a chinlock but Dorado fights up with a springboard moonsault press for two. An Iron Octopus has Dorado in more trouble but he pops up with a swinging slam into a faceplant. The high crossbody hits Tozawa for two (mainly because it hit Tozawa in the face) but he’s right back up with a top rope back elbow for the same. Dorado superkicks him down and the shooting star finishes Tozawa at 10:47.

Rating: C+. This was better than I was expecting because the two of them were given a chance to do their thing for more than a few minutes. These two are two rather talented guys but they aren’t going to get a chance on Raw. At least they have a shot here, and hopefully someone is actually paying attention. I mean they aren’t, but it’s nice to be hopeful.

We look at the Raw World Title match from TLC.

We look at MizTV breaking down to set up the night’s main event.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre/Sheamus/Keith Lee vs. Miz/John Morrison/AJ Styles

Holiday street fight, so Morrison and Sheamus start things off. Morrison elbows Sheamus in the head and takes him down by the leg in a bit of a surprise. Sheamus is taken into the corner for some triple teaming but Sheamus powers his way out without much trouble. It’s off to McIntyre, with Morrison taking him down by the leg. The Glasgow Kiss rocks Morrison though and Lee comes in for a double toss suplex to send Morrison flying.

A double shoulder drops Morrison as well and there’s a double hiptoss to AJ from Sheamus and Lee. Sheamus glares at Lee, who slaps him in the chest, causing Drew to have to separate them again and we take a break. Back with Miz and Morrison being shoved off the apron as things have calmed down a bit. Sheamus puts AJ in a chinlock but Styles gets up for the tag off to Morrison.

That’s fine with Sheamus, who knocks him down and goes up top, only to be shoved down through one of the tables at ringside. Back in and Miz takes over on Sheamus, even ripping at his face to make it worse. AJ comes in and cuts Sheamus off, only to get caught with White Noise. The hot tag brings in McIntyre to clean house with a bunch of suplexes. McIntyre nips up but tweaks his leg (which Morrison worked on earlier and AJ damaged last night) in the process.

It’s fine enough to hit a spinebuster for two as everything breaks down. Lee runs over Styles and Morrison takes the Irish Curse. AJ comes in with some candy cane kendo stick shots to McIntyre’s knee to take things outside. McIntyre throws him into a Christmas tree and then hits a powerbomb through a table of egg nog and cookies.

The Claymore is broken up but Sheamus tags himself in to load up the Brogue Kick. Lee tags himself in as well and shoves Morrison into Omos’ arms, allowing Omos to drop Morrison through a table (with the camera cutting to the ring and then back to the powerbomb). The Spirit Bomb finishes Miz at 18:25.

Rating: D+. What kind of a street fight was that? This was a regular six man for fifteen minutes with a weapons shot and some tables being broken in the last three, making me wonder why they bothered with the theme at all here. It didn’t help that they’re redoing the arguing teams from the Survivor Series deal (with two of the same people) a month later, but you can’t expect WWE to be that creative.

Post match Sheamus hits Lee with the Brogue Kick, causing McIntyre to yell WHY to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. All this show did was make me realize how fast this company goes at times. This was just over a week ago and it feels like years have passed. Other than that though, it didn’t exactly make me interested in where they are going, but that is the norm for the post TLC/pre-Rumble lull. Not a great show here, but Tozawa vs. Dorado did make me smile a bit.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

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