Impact Wrestling – March 24, 2020: Who Booked This?

IMG Credit: Impact Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: March 24, 2020
Location: Sam’s Town Live, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews

It’s the final night in Las Vegas before we head over towards Atlanta for what is now the last set of TV tapings available. We’re on the way towards Rebellion and that likely means a lot more “show is canceled” graphics. It’s not like they have much of a better choice so it’s as good as they can do here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Sami Callihan being revealed as the Realityislost hacker and attacking Ken Shamrock, who had just been announced as the newest Hall of Fame inductee.

Opening sequence.

Willie Mack vs. Chris Bey vs. Acey Romero vs. Daga vs. Rohit Raju vs. Jake Crist vs. Cousin Jake vs. Trey

One fall to a finish and the winner is the #1 contender to the X-Division Title. It’s a brawl to start (of course) and soon it’s Romero running over Bey and Crist on his own. A backsplash crushes Bey but a double missile dropkick puts Romero on the floor. That leaves Trey and Bey to trade missed dropkicks and it’s a quick standoff. Bey knocks Trey to the floor but gets crushed by Raju’s running splash in the corner.

Jake takes Bey’s place and hits a running shoulder to Raju in the corner as the one on one sequence continues. Mack slams Crist and the standing moonsault connects. Mack’s running flip dive takes out Jake and Crist, meaning it’s Daga and Trey going back inside. Bey joins them and gets powerbombed by Daga with Raju making the save. Daga and Raju miss each other a lot so Romero replaces Raju. That means Daga tries to slam him for some reason of general stupidity, leaving Romero to go up top.

The Tower of Doom sends Romero crashing down and Daga’s top rope splash gets two. We go into the parade of strikes to the face until Trey ties up Crist’s legs and suplexes Bey at the same time. Raju makes the save but can’t tornado DDT Jake. Mack’s fireman’s carry spinebuster plants Jake instead but Daga grabs Mack in a northern lights suplex. The dives are on in a hurry but Crist breaks up Romero’s attempt. That just earns him a Pounce, setting up Romero’s big dive to take out everyone else. Back in and Jake spinebusters Crist, only to have Mack hit the Six Star Frog Splash for the pin at 10:44.

Rating: C+. There isn’t much else you can do in this kind of a match as it’s a bunch of insanity until one person finally gets the win. Mack going after Ace Austin could be interesting and it wasn’t like there was another realistic option, save for perhaps Daga. It was as good as it could have been and a nice way to start the show.

Dave Crist tries to fire up Mad Man Fulton. Jake runs in to say it’s time to get back on a winning streak. Sami Callihan is testing them you see, but Dave says no one has spoken to them in months. They won’t do the thumbs up, thumbs down because they’re waiting for Sami.

Announcers preview the show.

Moose vs. Chase Stevens

Fallout from last week’s backstage fight. Moose jumps him before the bell but No Jackhammer Needed hits the buckle. An ax kick gives Chase two and a powerslam is good for the same. Back up and No Jackhammer Needed finishes Stevens at 1:15.

Post match Moose beats him up a bit more, including some chair shots to the ribs. Moose loads up a Pillmanization of the face but Scott D’Amore comes in to say if Moose wants TNA he can turn around. Cue Suicide to take Moose out as I STILL can’t believe they want to relive the TNA days.

Rosemary is still at the bar and rants about spending two years extracting revenge from the dark side. Someone off camera says “Two years? That’s it?” and it’s….Raven. He doesn’t think much of two years of hatred. Take him for example: it’s been twenty years and sometimes he isn’t sure if he hates Tommy Dreamer or loves him. Raven describes it as “orgasmic” because it goes on forever. He can’t wait to be in the same nursing home as Dreamer so he can cut the bag on Dreamer’s IV.

Ace Austin and Reno Scum come up to Willie Mack in the back. Willie isn’t buying into the mind games because he’s taking the title. Johnny Swinger comes in to say that’s it for the Mack and Pack Connection, but the miz-arks really want to see the two of them fight for the X-Division Title. That’ll get him some rats.

Reno Scum vs. Rascalz

Dez and Wentz of course. A quick spinebuster plants Dez and it’s a catapult into a Death Valley Driver for a very early two. Dez gets sent into the corner before he can even take his hoodie off and there’s the Pit Stop to make it worse. A kick to the face allows the double tag to Wentz and Luster as the pace picks up. Everything breaks down and it’s Wentz being sent outside, leaving Dez to take a top rope Curb Stomp for the pin at 4:36.

Rating: D+. Just a nothing match here with Reno Scum continuing to offer almost nothing whatsoever, likely aside from working cheap. There have been very few moments where I’ve seen anything int hem and this was no exception. That being said, what the heck happened to the Rascalz? They were awesome when they came in and now they can barely ever win a match, even a clean loss like this to Reno Scum.

Another Tenille Dashwood video. Is there a point to these or are we just at the start of their version of Emmalina?

Flashback Moment of the Week: LAX beats Team 3D to win the vacant Tag Team Titles at Sacrifice 2008.

Joey Ryan gives something close to a PSA about keeping Katie Forbes safe from the Deaners.

The Deaners aren’t sure what it means to be canceled, or what toxic masculinity means.

Sami Callihan is in a small room and asks why he did what he did. Impact has made him wrestle Shamrock one on one on pay per view and that’s not cool. Shamrock was the World’s Most Dangerous Man but now that’s him, because he sees everything.

Dave Crist/Mad Man Fulton vs. Sabu/Rhino

Old School Rules and Super Genie is here with Sabu and Rhino. Dave and Sabu start things off with a clothesline sending Dave to the corner. It’s off to Fulton vs. Rhino as I try to figure out why we are having tags in a match under ECW rules. Everything breaks down in a hurry and they all wind up on the floor, with the fight heading to the ramp. A chair is dropped though and Fulton sends Rhino into the corner back inside.

Rhino fights back on Dave without too much trouble and hands it back to Sabu. That means a slam from Fulton and Crist yells at the referee over a near fall. Sabu is back up with a cutter and the hot tag brings in Rhino to clean house. Genie throws in a chair so Sabu can hit Fulton, setting up a dive to the floor. Dave hits Rhino low and grabs the chair, but stops to swing at the referee. That means a Gore from Rhino to pin Dave at 8:14.

Rating: D-. So they barely used the weapons, the match was sloppy, they stopped in the middle of the brawling segment, and then Rhino pinned Crist. I know Callis wants to keep his old buddies around and give them a payday but could they get something close to decent in the ring? Or beat up less important opponents?

Su Yung uses the coffin to go to the Undead Realm to face Havok. She finds some people tied up, James Mitchell, and Havok herself. Mitchell says Yung has to go so Havok grabs a crowbar. Yung has a sword and the fight is on with Yung choking with the noose. One of the chained up men breaks free and hits Yung with a pipe and various other things to keep her down….until she cuts his throat with the sword.

Havok saves Mitchell from the save fate but gets caught with the Mandible Claw. Mitchell stops them and says Yung has proven that she should have been with him the whole time. The minions come in to grab them both though and Mitchell sends them to the Wastelands, which look like a desert.

Tessa Blanchard/Eddie Edwards vs. Michael Elgin/Taya Valkyrie

John E. Bravo is here with Elgin and Valkyrie. Eddie and Elgin start but Tessa wants to come in instead. That means it’s off to Tessa instead, with a quick leg trip taking Taya down. A spear drops Tessa as well, but she’s right back up to face Elgin. Some shots to Elgin’s knee slow him down and it’s off to Eddie, who has to slip out of a suplex attempt.

A Bravo distraction lets Taya pull Tessa off the apron and Elgin’s pop up powerslam gets two on Eddie. Back from a break with Eddie still in trouble but turning it into a slugout with Elgin. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets Eddie a breather and the hot tag brings in Tessa to clean house. Both men save their partners from getting slammed down but Tessa hurricanranas her way out of a superbomb. Eddie comes back in for the rapid fire chops to Elgin, followed by the overhead belly to belly to put him on the floor.

Bravo gets knocked off the apron and there are the double dives to take out the villains. A Codebreaker out of the corner into a tiger driver gets two on Elgin with Taya making the save. Eddie kicks Taya to the floor but Magnum is countered into a powerbomb onto Eddie’s back. Tessa is back up with a reverse hurricanrana and tornado DDT to Elgin but Elgin blasts Tessa down. The Elgin Bomb doesn’t work on Eddie, who strikes Elgin down instead. Taya’s distraction sets up the buckle bomb into the Elgin Bomb for the pin at Taya cuts Tessa off at 18:04.

Rating: B. Good, hard hitting match here as Impact has figured out how to do man vs. woman without it being hard to accept (granted having Tessa and Taya can make that a lot easier). This sets Elgin up as a monster going after the title at Rebellion and I’m not sure how that whole thing would have wound up. Odds are we’ll see the match at some point and I’m curious to see how it goes, so well done on that front.

We go back to the Wastelands….and Rosemary just happens to be there. She doesn’t care what Mitchell did to them and the alliance is formed. They wind up back in Mitchell’s lair, with Rosemary putting on sunglasses and going off on her own. Mitchell tells Havok and Yung that it was just a test and they can be a unit. Mitchell stabs him in the stomach with a dagger and Mitchell dies, only to wake up in Heaven with….a cat and Abyss? Mitchell: “Who booked this s***?”

Overall Rating: C+. This show worked out rather well with most of the show working out well. They did some good stuff to get rid of Mitchell (you knew that was going to be something zany) and it was an entertaining enough show. I’m not sure what they’re going to do in four weeks when we get done with what should have been the go home show for Rebellion. This was good though, and that’s what matters most at the moment.

Results

Willie Mack b. Cousin Jake, Trey, Daga, Acey Romero, Chris Bey, Rohit Raju and Jake Crist – Six Star Frog Splash to Jake

Moose b. Chase Stevens – No Jackhammer Needed

Reno Scum b. Rascalz – Top rope curb stomp to Trey

Rhino/Sabu b. Dave Crist/Mad Man Fulton – Gore to Crist

Michael Elgin/Taya Valkyrie b. Tessa Blanchard/Eddie Edwards – Elgin Bomb to Edwards

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

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